Why is my wife so intolerant to sexual activity?

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Since joining 69 , I've seen so many friends' wives in the blog posts, so alluring in bed, and I'm incredibly envious. As one friend said, women need to be developed. Shamefully, perhaps because of my lack of skill and size, my wife hasn't reached that level of maturity yet. The information I find online is all the same textbook-style nonsense; most of the friends on 69 are experienced professionals. Therefore, I sincerely hope to find someone to guide me; I would be extremely grateful. Below, I'll share our experiences from the beginning of our relationship, so that an expert can diagnose our situation.

My wife and I have been married for 10 years. We were each other's first love, and we each lost our virginity to the other. Because my wife is a good girl, she only allowed me to fully possess her after we got married; before marriage, I could only touch and lick her. Looking back on these 10 years, through long-term sexual activity, my wife gradually went from being inexperienced to becoming more skilled in bed. Below, I will describe the progress in sections.

My wife was very feminine even when we were in school; she was the epitome of a virtuous wife and loving mother, the kind of woman everyone wanted to possess. So, several men were always pursuing her. Winning her over was a feat of triumph over all the other suitors. When she agreed to be my girlfriend, those other men were heartbroken and devastated. Looking back now, it's quite a感慨 (feeling of mixed emotions). For the first six months after we got together, we basically only held hands and kissed, but at the time, I felt incredibly happy.

Six months later, my current wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, finally allowed me to touch her breasts and genitals, though she was somewhat reluctant. I remember the first time I touched the inside of her labia minora, even though she was already quite wet and I wasn't using much force, she still felt pain. This painful process lasted for about six months. After I touched her and gave her oral sex, it didn't hurt as much after six months.

Six months later, we finally had genital contact, but it was only external friction, no penetration. Since neither of us had experience, and I was terrified of my girlfriend getting pregnant, we always used condoms during external contact. Even though it was just external contact with a condom, it was incredibly pleasurable for both of us. Looking back, I was so naive, such an ignorant virgin. This process of contact lasted from six months of dating until we registered our marriage, about three years—it seems unbelievable now. The reason I didn't take her virginity was that my girlfriend wanted to save it for our wedding day, not before marriage. My thinking was that since we were both in school, and our majors didn't offer good job prospects, if I took her virginity but we couldn't live in the same city and broke up, she would be troubled or even abandoned by her future husband. I truly loved her, and if it would be detrimental to her, I would rather keep her virginity for the person who could protect her for life. Every time I thought about this, I felt immense pain.

Three years later, we finally found jobs in the same city. After three and a half years, we registered our marriage and held our wedding a month later. After registering, she finally went from being my girlfriend to my wife, and I could finally have sex with her without any worries. Because we didn't plan to get pregnant so quickly, we still used condoms. The first time failed; she was in pain and her face turned pale, but we still couldn't penetrate. Looking back now, it's really not suitable to use condoms when it's first time because our bodily fluids don't mix well, resulting in poor lubrication. But at the time, I was foolish enough not to dare not use one, and I didn't know about contraceptive suppositories or liquid condoms. Now, I think if someone had given me some guidance, it would have really reduced my wife's pain a lot and saved her from making the same mistakes. I really have to condemn the textbook-style, rigid, old-fashioned sex guides online, which almost all say that you should use a condom for the first time, when in reality, using a condom can make the woman suffer more. Since the first attempt failed, to reduce my wife's psychological pressure, I said we wouldn't pursue penetration anymore, but would try each time we had sex, and let nature take its course; we'd succeed when we succeeded. Each time, I would have my wife spread her legs wide open. After putting on a condom, I would hold my penis and try to part her labia minora, but every time I tried to penetrate, she would cry out in pain, so I would immediately give up to avoid traumatizing her. During this time, an incident occurred. Because I had just started working and was short of money, I was sharing a two-bedroom apartment with someone. Both bedrooms connected to a large balcony, separated by aluminum alloy doors and windows. We rented one bedroom, while another man, seven or eight years older than me, a very masculine married man, rented the other. That man was very enthusiastic about my wife, clearly lusting after her. Because that man was usually not around, I seriously overlooked one thing: the view into the bedroom through the large window from the balcony was very clear, especially at night when the lights were on, and the bed was right next to the window. Just as I was spreading my naked wife's legs by the bed, exposing her genitals, and clumsily trying to rub my penis against her, my wife's genitals were directly facing the window, only about 30 centimeters away. Just then, the man next door returned, but we didn't know it. He saw everything clearly from his balcony, and he looked down at us. He saw the whole scene unfold, and we realized he was seeing things all over the place. He looked at us from his balcony and saw the whole thing. He looked at us from his balcony and saw the whole thing unfold ... The text appears to be a jumbled collection of characters and symbols, possibly from a corrupted or garbled document. It doesn't form coherent sentences or paragraphs. A direct translation isn't meaningful without further context or clarification.
Finally, during our intimate moment, my wife seemed to have made a huge decision. She guided my penis, aimed it, and asked me to hold her tightly as I penetrated. I didn't look anymore and thrust in forcefully. I felt a soft, enveloping place inside, but even after only a small part of it went in, my wife was already in pain. I asked her with concern if it hurt, and she insisted that it was okay and to continue. I slowly inserted my entire penis. I was so excited at that moment, repeatedly telling myself, "I've finally slept with a woman! The wife I've been pursuing all this time has finally been with me!" Perhaps because I had experienced a lot of friction before and was mentally prepared, I didn't ejaculate prematurely the first time. I unleashed the primal instincts I had accumulated for over 20 years and the possessiveness I had felt for her for over 3 years, ravaging her to my heart's content, while my wife shed tears. I asked her what was wrong, and she said it was okay and to continue. This first time, I actually fucked her for an hour! Another reason was that my wife's vagina wasn't really tight at the time. She was afraid of causing more pain, so she tried her best to relax and didn't dare to tighten at all. Moreover, she said she didn't feel any pleasure, just pain. That day, I fucked my wife twice, each time for an hour. The second time, the pain was slightly less. We had sex once a day for a month until my wife finally stopped feeling pain. I thought she would feel comfortable after that, but instead, she didn't. Even though she was very wet during foreplay, penetration didn't bring her pleasure. Also, I always felt her vagina wasn't tight. To make her feel better, I would massage her clitoris after each time to help her reach orgasm.

For three years, my wife experienced a process that was neither painful nor comfortable. During those three years, although she was easily aroused, she simply didn't feel anything during penetration. She wanted it every day; if she didn't, she would get angry. This wasn't because of her physical needs, but because she felt neglected and emotionally unable to accept it, especially since I often found her vagina dry. Therefore, this couldn't be interpreted as a sign of high libido; it was merely psychological comfort. After three years, my wife gradually began to feel pleasure during penetration, even achieving a few vaginal orgasms. And it was at this point that I finally experienced the legendary tightness—it truly was tight. It turns out that a woman's tightness is predicated on her feeling comfortable.

The matter should have ended there, but three problems remain unresolved. First, my wife only has one orgasm; after that, she loses interest. But women can have multiple orgasms, right? I really wish I could bring her to multiple orgasms. How can I do that? Second, when my wife is feeling good, she's very tight, but this tightness is different from what many people describe. It's a tightness that forces the penis out; it's so tight that I can't penetrate unless it's fully erect. Finally, I've read a lot about how seductive women can be, but my wife is completely passive and somewhat lazy during sex. How can I arouse her? Third, during sex, the angle of penetration can't be too difficult, and the force can't be too strong, otherwise it will hurt. Don't women like it when it's intense? What should I do?

Friends with ID 69 , please feel free to offer your advice, thank you!

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Why is my wife so intolerant to sexual activity?

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