Sijin

Jingzhu ignored me for several days afterward, and I knew I was in the wrong and didn't dare to provoke her. After much persuasion, I went to the Wangfujing Hotel and bought her several LV bags and Valentino clothes, showering her with countless nauseatingly sweet words, before she finally gave me a warm welcome. I felt like a snake completely controlled by Jingzhu, left to her whims.
Sometimes I truly hate myself for humbling myself for an ordinary woman; where has my youthful ambition gone? Those who are too sentimental are destined to achieve nothing great. Thinking back to my lofty ideals of youth, they have all vanished like the mighty Yangtze River because of Jingzhu. She made me complacent and timid. Before marrying her, I thought I would give up everything for her, but I can't deceive myself. A man's most important thing is his career, even though it's mundane. We're all living in this world; who can be more detached?
It's been a long time since I visited my ex-wife, Wan Sijin. I wonder how my little Zichun is doing? I long to see her chubby little face, whether she still needs her mother to feed her, whether her baby teeth have all come in so she won't need her mother's milk anymore. Your mother is a dance teacher; she needs to maintain a good figure.
Looking at sleeping little Yang Ge, her adorable little face is exactly like Zi Chun's. Little Zi Chun, are you doing well without your father?
I don't want to watch TV at night, so I make a cup of coffee and turn on RealPlayer, but all I hear is Xu Ruyun's "If You Don't Love Me, Let Me Go," her voice plaintive and sorrowful. Thinking of innocent Si Jin, living a life of widowhood because of a promise I made, I know someone is pursuing her, but I just can't bear the thought of little Zi Chun having a stepfather, nor do I want my beautiful ex-wife lying in someone else's arms. Even though it's selfish, I just can't get over it.
I think I should go see Si Jin. She's living a cold and lonely life, yet I keep giving her empty promises, making her wait in vain for a hope she can't see.
Once again, I come to this familiar place, but I don't even have the courage to knock. I quietly take out a cigarette and hesitate at the door.
"Oh, isn't this... Director Yang? Why aren't you coming in?" It was the nanny, Aunt Liu.
Si Jin came to the door upon hearing the voice. Gone was her usual expectant smile; instead, I was met with confusion, resentment, and a cold gaze. Without a word, my heart ached with sadness and desolation, and I was at a loss for words.
"Jin, I've wanted to visit you for a while... You know, I've been busy with some things, and work has been quite hectic lately. I'm so sorry, I'll come more often in the future."
"No need, thank you for your concern, Director Yang. I won't be foolish enough to listen to your lies anymore. We're doing just fine without you. By the way, I have a boyfriend now, someone with a higher rank, more money, and more handsome than you. Please don't come anymore; spend more time with your menopausal wife." I knew she was just saying it out of anger; my friends at the military arts academy often told me about her situation. But I couldn't expose her lies, so I stubbornly continued the lie.

What Sijin said wasn't entirely false; recently, someone had indeed made a move on her, but it was still in its early stages, and Sijin hadn't fully realized it yet.
After verifying through various channels, I finally confirmed that a singer and actor from the General Political Department Drama Troupe was planning to pursue my ex-wife. Logically, I shouldn't interfere; that guy was quite good-looking, a first-class actor, divorced, and decent-looking, though a bit effeminate, he didn't seem like the type to play with feelings. But I just couldn't accept it. If Jingzhu hadn't come along, we might still be doing well. Besides, Sijin and I have a grown child; I couldn't let that guy get away with being a father so easily. I decided to find an opportunity to warn him.
At a celebration banquet after a large awards ceremony, I found my chance. Erothy and my ex-wife, Wan Sijin, were sitting at the same table, right next to each other. Erothy and my ex-wife were chatting and laughing, and Erothy kept putting food on her plate and getting her napkins. Looking at my ex-wife in her olive green dress, so dashing and spirited, no less so than Jingzhu, I recalled a passage: "Imagine her on Bright Summit, by the Green Pool, her smile as beautiful as a flower, her white robes whiter than snow, her long sword frosty, captivating countless heroes and warriors." A strong pang of jealousy welled up within me, but I couldn't show it in front of so many people.
As one of the guests, I went around toasting, greeting, and shaking hands at each table, offering some perfunctory words of encouragement. When I arrived at my ex-wife's table, I deliberately acted very friendly with her, even mentioning our child. Most of the people present knew about our relationship and didn't make a fuss, leaving Cream quite embarrassed.
As the banquet was nearing its end and most people had left, Cream said to my ex-wife, "Teacher Wan, how about I see you off?"
I sneered inwardly: Brother, my wife has a car, which I bought for her. Judging by Cream's address, he's only just getting started.
To my surprise, Sijin arrived by school bus. I panicked and rushed forward, saying, "Sijin, come with me, let's go see Zichun too." This made Cream's face turn green with embarrassment. I added a few harsher words to make him give up on Sijin: "Dude, listen up, we're definitely going to remarry, so don't bother. Don't come looking for Sijin anymore, there's no business between us, just go about your business."
"What are you saying? This is my right! You don't cherish it, and you expect others to? You're sick in the head!" Cream, having drunk some alcohol and already feeling irritated by me at the dinner table, was now venting his frustration.
"You little brat, are you trying to be difficult? Say that again and I'll beat you to death!" I was really getting angry. Sijin quickly pulled me back and said, "What are you doing? Lao Cai, go back first. He's just talking nonsense, don't mind him."
Seeing Sijin like this, Cream was even more provoked. "You come and hit me, I don't believe you dare to hit a soldier."
I didn't mean any harm to Cream originally, but these words enraged me. I pointed at him and said, "Pah! You don't even deserve to be called soldiers! Don't tarnish the word 'soldier.' With your kind of background, doing advertisements, doing gigs, driving sports cars, living in villas, and being famous..." "Gaining both profit and prestige, and then using the sanctity of military service to glorify yourself at a crucial moment—what a bunch of scoundrels! Oh, I didn't realize you were a colonel. Do you even know where the safety is on a gun? Actors have never entered officialdom, you know? You guys used to be actors, just singing ditties and entertaining people. How come you dare to be generals now? Don't be so smug for too long. Sooner or later we'll shut down your 'military playgrounds,' saving taxpayers some money for retirement."
Seeing that I was getting more and more excited, several of my companions dragged me away. Before leaving, I didn't forget to pull Sijin along, determined not to let her associate with the puppet soldiers.

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