Here are 6 more adult jokes

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1. The places my husband touched
The husband accidentally left his handprint on the freshly painted wall when he turned on the light.
The next day, the wife called the painter over: "I want you to see the places my husband touched last night."
The painter fainted while his nose was bleeding profusely...
Comment: Paint, you're overthinking it.
2 The most tragic affair
The couple having an affair were enjoying themselves in the woman's home when suddenly they heard the sound of a key unlocking the door.
"Oh no! My husband's home!" The man, upon hearing this, tried to run but was stopped by the woman. "It's too late, listen to me!" The woman grabbed a bottle of baby oil, smeared it all over the man, and made him pose. The husband walked in and immediately saw it, surprised: "What's this?" The woman calmly replied: "Oh, my new human sculpture."
Husband: When did you start liking this thing?
Woman: Last month I went to my neighbor's house and saw one in their bedroom, so I bought the same one.
Her husband then stopped asking questions.
The next day at noon, while his wife was out, the husband took a piece of bread into the bedroom and said to the "statue," "Brother, have something to eat. Don't end up like me, starving for three days and three nights at the neighbor's house..."
Comment: Why do women make things difficult for other women? Men never make things difficult for other men!
3. My wife has been won over.
Director Wang was invited out for drinks, with the plan to go to a karaoke bar afterward to "have some fun" with some women. But that night, Director Wang got too drunk, so everyone had to abandon their original plan and help him home. His wife helped him take off his clothes, helped him to bed, and then went to sleep herself.
Half an hour later, Director Wang's wife was suddenly awakened by a phone ring. She picked it up and heard her husband's voice: "Honey, I'll be home late...late...I'll be home a little later, I have...a social engagement..."
Director Wang's wife then realized her husband wasn't in bed. Getting out of bed, she saw him in the bathroom with his phone. As soon as he saw her, he said, "You go to sleep...go to sleep! I've...I've taken care of...take care of things at home..."
Comment: It's become so ingrained that I can no longer distinguish between cultivated and wildflowers.
4. Don't touch it anymore.
A couple was cuddling sweetly in the park. The man, seeing how smooth the woman's hair was, couldn't resist touching it. The woman said coquettishly, "Oh! You're so naughty!"
The man's desire intensified, so he secretly touched her again, but the woman said, "No, please!"
The man's heart leaped with excitement upon hearing this, and he touched it again. Suddenly, the woman stood up and said rudely, "Stop touching it! My wig is about to fall off!!!"
Comment: After all that, I still haven't found the right place.
5. Couples wearing the same color
During the banquet, a self-proclaimed charming man suddenly whispered to the hostess, Mary, "Mary, tonight's banquet is wonderful! If I could find a woman I click with, could we borrow your private room for a secret rendezvous?"
The kind and straightforward Mary replied, "No problem, but what about your wife?"
“Don’t worry, I’ll only be there for a few minutes, she won’t think of me,” the man said.
The hostess smiled and nodded, saying, "Indeed, I don't think she would have thought of you. She just asked to use my bedroom ten minutes ago."
Comment: Like husband, like wife. That's why they say birds of a feather flock together. 6. A happy one-hour school assembly, the discipline master gave the final remarks: "In short, I hope that no matter where you are, you will always remember that you are students of this school. You must never smoke while walking, you are not allowed to wear shorts in the classroom, and even in your own room, you must not talk about indecent topics."
"Also, ladies, if any lecherous boys harass you, don't pay them any attention. Ask yourselves, is it worth ruining your lifelong reputation for an hour of pleasure?" "Okay, any questions?"
Just as the entire room fell silent, a delicate voice suddenly rang out: "Excuse me... what can I do to make him last for an hour?"
Comment: An hour of happiness is already the ultimate happiness; I'd be willing to risk everything for it.

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Here are 6 more adult jokes

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