Themed Jokes - Flight Attendant Series 2-12

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[Joke 1] The flight attendant was serving meals when she approached a passenger and asked, "Sir, we have chicken rice and fish rice."
"What kind of food would you like?"
The passenger replied, "Spare ribs!"
The flight attendant repeated herself, and the passenger still answered, "Spare ribs!"
At this point, the flight attendant asked, "We have chicken ribs and fish ribs, which would you like?"
Comment: I keep asking for ribs, and then I'll give you cockroach ribs in a bit.
[Joke 2] The call bell rings. Flight attendant: Hello, how can I help you?
Passenger: Can I have a glass of water?
Flight attendant: Of course, would you like bottled water?
Passenger: Do you have juice?
Flight attendant: Yes, orange juice and peach juice, which would you like?
Passenger: Do you have Coke?
Flight attendant: Yes, would you like some ice?
Passenger: Then give me a cup of tea!
Comment: What do you want? Do you want the flight attendants to recite the menu? They're not comedians.
[Joke 3] One day, while flying a 737-700, a passenger in the rear cabin went to the lavatory. He stood at the lavatory door and shook it vigorously. A flight attendant kindly reminded him, "Sir, please push it in." The passenger then gently poked the door with his index finger. The flight attendant then said...
The flight attendant "pushed" the passenger and made another poke. The passenger, startled, took a deep breath and blew hard into the lavatory.
The flight attendants burst into laughter. They hurriedly opened the door for him, saying, "You're so funny! I meant push hard, not use..."
Blow it out!
Comment: Either the flight attendant has an accent, or this person didn't have ears.
[Joke 4] A flight attendant was bringing two pots of coffee to the cabin when a passenger pointed out the window and asked, "Miss, is this..."
"What lake is it?" the flight attendant replied, "A coffee pot."
Passengers burst into laughter
Comment: It seems that flight attendants need to strengthen their dialect education. Also, this flight attendant is a bit disrespectful.
[Joke 5] cc: Which do you prefer, beef or fish?
pa: Okay, I want beef and...
cc: refers to both cow and fish.
pa: Oh, then I want to have fish.
Comment: Alien passengers have arrived! I can't take it! Cabin manager, please take care of them.
[Joke 6] A male passenger was flying for the first time and pressed the call button. Flight attendant: Sir, how can I help you?
Right?
Male passenger: Silent
Flight attendant: This is the call button. Press it again if you need anything and we'll help you!
The male passenger nodded. Before the flight attendant could return to her seat, the call button rang again. The male passenger stood up and shouted loudly into the call button, "Coke—with ice!!!"
Comment: Thank goodness he didn't say, "I need to go to the restroom." Flight attendants really have it tough.
[Joke 7] The flight attendant was greeting passengers at the gate when a young man boarded: "Welcome aboard! What seat are you in?"
"I'm a Scorpio, what about you?"
I'm a Scorpio, and I'm asking which seat you'd like to sit in.
Comment: You need to ask someone's zodiac sign to board a plane? Haha. The passenger is so witty.
[Joke 8] A very annoying male passenger took the apple from the meal and asked the flight attendant, "How do I eat this apple?"
The flight attendant replied, "Gnawing on the skin."
Comment: The flight attendant was relatively kind; it would have been unethical to eat the nuclear matter.
[Joke 9] A passenger, holding a completely empty plate (not even a single vegetable leaf was left), said: Miss, you...
The food was terrible, it was practically dog food!!
Comment: Dog food, how come you haven't eaten any less? If it were human food, wouldn't you stop eating it?
[Joke 10] Flight attendant: "Chicken rice or pork rice, which would you like?"
Passenger: "We two want the pig, he wants the chicken!"
Comment: Want chicken? Haha, I'm afraid you're not in first class; airlines don't offer that kind of service.
[Joke 11] Passenger: "I'd like a Coke."
The flight attendant asked uncertainly, "Are you Coke?"
Passenger: "No!" Flight attendant: "Then who are you?" Passenger: "I'm a person, I want a Coke!"
Comment: The flight attendant probably didn't sleep well last night. Can't she even say one more word?
[Joke 12] One day, during a flight.
A security guard saw a passenger using their mobile phone and immediately walked over and said sternly, "Don't type 'fj' on your phone!"

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Themed Jokes - Flight Attendant Series 2-12

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