After Kuaibo was suspended

page views:1 Publication date:2022-05-28

1. A: I heard Kuaibo was shut down. What do you all think China's future development will be like?

B: The rate of sex crimes will increase again. C

: Tissue sales will drop significantly.

D: Hospital abortion business will boom.

Expert: The physical fitness of the Chinese people will surpass that of Europe and America.

2. After the cabbage caterpillar's "True Manual of Leeks and Celery" was stolen by the little white rabbit, the cabbage caterpillar had no choice but to retire from the business. Without the cabbage caterpillar's interference, the little white rabbit's leek garden grew greener and greener. Eating leeks every day, the little white rabbit's husband wanted to have sex every night, leaving the little white rabbit pale and bloodless except for her eyes. To get a good night's sleep, the little white rabbit shamelessly went to the cabbage caterpillar's house, begging him to return to the business!

The cabbage worm said, "I'm tired of the life of a wandering swordsman and will never leave the world again, but I can teach you a method!"

The little white rabbit said, "I'd like to hear the details!"

The cabbage worm said, "Give my book, *The Precious Classic of Leeks and Celery*, to your husband to practice, and then you can go to sleep!"

The little white rabbit said, "What if my husband castrates himself?"

The cabbage worm said, "I'm talking about *The Legend of the Condor Heroes*, but you're bringing up Dongfang Bubai. It's truly incomprehensible!"

3. The husband, while watching the TV series *Dream of the Red Chamber*, sighed: "I think Jia Baoyu is just so-so. How come so many beautiful women in the Grand View Garden like him and want him? It's really hard to understand." The wife, coming from the kitchen, overheard and interjected: "That's just the fake Baoyu. If it were the real Baoyu, wouldn't those women be fighting each other?"

4. The wife's cousin had been married for three years without conceiving. One day, the wife said to her husband, a doctor: "Could you go to your hospital's gynecology department and ask around? What's wrong with her not being able to conceive?"

Husband: I asked the gynecologist, and she said your cousin had a checkup last time, and they said it was a problem with her fallopian tubes being blocked. They said the problem could be solved by unblocking the fallopian tubes.

Wife: Oh, so it's a problem with the fallopian tubes. How come people have fallopian tubes?

5. The husband was intently watching the live broadcast of the Chinese women's football team playing against the Thai women's football team. Just after the Chinese team scored eight goals, he suddenly heard his wife shouting: "Oh dear, how can they be so fragile!"

The husband, annoyed, said: "Who are you saying isn't exciting? They've scored eight goals already, how many more goals do you want for it to be exciting?" His wife then

stretched out her foot, wearing a shoe with a broken sole, and said: "Look at these shoes, I've only worn them for two days, and the sole is already broken. And they're brand-name shoes! Even brand-name shoes are so fragile!"

Husband: ...

6. A fly, a mosquito, and a dung beetle were childhood friends. The dung beetle studied hard and got into university, while the fly and mosquito were playful and didn't even graduate from junior high school. One day, a fly and a mosquito came to the city to visit a dung beetle. They finally found the university the dung beetle was studying at, but there were so many colleges! The mosquito said in distress, "Brother Fly, what is the dung beetle's major? Which college is he in? Aren't we just looking for a needle in a haystack?"

The fly confidently said, "Sister Mosquito, the dung beetle is studying history, so he must be in the history college."

The mosquito asked in confusion, "How do you know, Brother Fly?" The fly said mysteriously, "Studying history means studying not only ancient dung, but also modern dung, and contemporary dung, not only our country's dung, but also the dung of all other countries. The dung beetle likes rolling dung balls, so he must be studying history!"

The mosquito asked again, "But, Brother Fly, the history college..." "Where is it? The university is so big, where can we look?"

the fly lectured the mosquito. "Little mosquito, use your brain, smell it, and you'll find it by the stench!"

The mosquito suddenly realized, "Hey! Brother fly, a dog is coming, it must be the dung beetle's classmate, let's ask it!"

The fly asked the mosquito, "How do you know the dung beetle and the dog are classmates?" The mosquito confidently said, "Brother fly, as the saying goes, a dog can't change its nature of eating dung. The dung beetle likes to roll dung balls, and the dog likes to eat dung, so they must both study history!"

The fly said, "Little mosquito, you're so smart!" The fly and the mosquito went up to ask the dog, and sure enough, the dog and the dung beetle were classmates. The dog led the fly and the mosquito to the dung beetle.

7. Coco came to the company looking dejected.

A colleague asked with concern, "What's wrong? Why are you looking so down?

" Coco: "Don't mention it, yesterday was April Fool's Day, and I lied to my dad that I wasn't his biological son, and my dad was very angry!

" Colleague: "Is that all?"

Coco: "Of course not!"我爸为了找到拆穿我的证据，就带我去做亲子鉴定了！

同事：结果…？

可可：结果我真不是我爸的孩子，他现在正和我妈闹离婚呢~

8、老兄，你知道我那天为什么挨揍吗？我看见那靓妹腰间有一个“黑点”，我十分好奇，就忍不住偷偷地点了一下，谁知那是一暗扣，结果胸罩全开了……

9、深夜，王老师批改完最后一份试卷，疲惫地拧开了收音机，想听音乐放松一下。收音机里传来了点歌台主持人的声音：“初~三~毕业班二班全体同学一同把这首歌奉献给他们敬爱的数学胡老师听，感谢他多年来给他们布置了做也做不完的数学练习题(尤其是今年)，使他们得到了宝贵的练习机会……”听到这，王老师的眼睛湿润了，心力交瘁的脸上露出一丝安慰的笑容。 The host continued, "...Now let's listen to this song together, Lao Mao's 'Can't Afford to Be Hurt'... I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you so much I'll forget you completely..." Suddenly, I felt dizzy and my vision blurred...

10. One day, I was standing on a bus stop laughing out loud, attracting the attention of passersby who stared at me like I was a rare animal. One of them asked me why I was laughing so foolishly. I suppressed my laughter and said smugly, "I tricked the ticket seller. I bought a ticket to the train station, but I got off halfway there, and he didn't stop me, he just kept driving!"

11. One day, Pigsy asked Tang Sanzang, "Master, how did you rank us brothers? Was it according to the time we joined the sect?"

Tang Sanzang shook his head and said, "No, it wasn't like that. I ranked you according to your value .

" Pigsy nodded, "I understand. The eldest brother can do seventy-two transformations, I only know thirty-six. So he's the eldest brother."

Tang Sanzang shook his head again and said, "I ranked you according to your value, look." Of the three of you, isn't the eldest brother's monkey brain the most valuable, then your pig's head, and finally Sha Wujing's fish head the cheapest, so he's ranked last?

Pigsy: .....

12. Host: This competition is about comparing the most difficult things... The most difficult thing wins...

Just as the host finished speaking, Tang Sanzang confidently walked onto the stage: Everyone, this championship is mine! As you all know, I went through eighty-one tribulations on my journey to the West... Before Tang Sanzang

could finish speaking, a middle-aged man walked up: What's that? Every time you encounter trouble, you have so many disciples and reinforcements. Look at mine... He put down the paper in his hand, saying that he had already stamped eighty-one seals for one project... There are still a few units to go, so the project hasn't even started yet...

Tang Sanzang: This... Yours is more difficult... I'm not as good as you, the championship is yours...

At this moment, an old man asked: What do you mean it's his? I've tried everything to get my wages: blocking roads, petitioning, climbing poles, even jumping off buildings, and I still don't know where my boss is...

Tang Sanzang and the middle-aged man: Old man, your challenge is truly remarkable... We are humbled...

The host announces: The champion of the difficulty contest is the old man demanding his wages...

13. In Wuhan, female college students, wanting to earn some pocket money, stuck advertisements on their thighs. Whenever someone scanned the QR code on the ad, the female students would earn pocket money. Thus, the following scene unfolded: a large group of female college students walking down the street with their thighs exposed. Suddenly, a male student saw the advertisement and called out to a girl, asking him to scan it. The girl stopped, and the boy crouched down. After a while, the boy finished and walked away. The girl said, "Wait." The boy asked, "Why?" The girl said, "Why didn't I hear the 'beep' sound of the QR code? Instead, I heard the 'click' sound of a camera?" The boy: ...

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After Kuaibo was suspended

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