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Stop wallowing in self-pity and resentment that your partner can't satisfy your desires. Instead of sitting there complaining, use your intelligence and effort in your sex life to find ways that benefit both of you. To alleviate your sexual frustration and make your sexual relationship with your partner more wonderful, the following methods are worth trying. If you're willing to explore each other's senses together, then massage can take you into a new realm of physical play and sexual space, enriching your relationship. You probably remember that during your dating days, you exchanged caresses as frequently as you kissed. However, once you establish a relationship—a very healthy and reciprocal one—life often lacks romantic excitement and mutual desire. Yes, in our society, many couples have lost the precision of touch and overlooked the vast middle ground between holding hands and making love. Actions in this middle ground can foster intimacy and enhance sexual pleasure, and massage between lovers is a worthwhile area to explore. Before we start massaging each other, let us tell you some little secrets about our senses. We have many pleasure points on our bodies that you haven't yet discovered or haven't noticed. These points, which we're emphasizing here, may be quite sensitive to touch because they are rarely exposed or caressed! 12 Pleasure Points:
● Gently massaging the breasts will bring intense pleasure and desire.
● The nipples respond to gentle caresses, increasing sexual arousal.
● The lips and mouth are very sensitive to touch, increasing sensuality.
● Massaging the lower abdomen has a relaxing effect, increasing sexual response and anticipation.
● Massaging the inner thighs can relieve sexual tension and help with the flow of sensuality.
● Touching the earlobes can quickly convey sensual stimulation and pleasure.
● Caressing the back of the neck can arouse very strong sexual arousal.
● Gently stroking the armpits and the soft inner upper arms will feel very pleasant.
● The buttocks are very sensual and respond to strong massage.
● The groin area near the genitals is a very sensual spot.
● The knees (behind the kneecaps) are also highly sensitive to gentle massage and touch.
● Massaging the big toe will trigger a full-body sexual response.
Before a massage, you can buy an inexpensive home massage mat or pad, or simply pull out a folded mattress and place it in the middle of the floor. If you have a sturdy dining table, you can also place a sponge mat or blanket on it. Use a folded pillow, blanket, or towel for the massage. You will also need some lubricant, massage oil, powder, or lotion. Of course, you can also use the currently popular essential oils, which will make your hands move smoothly during the massage. Most experts recommend using plant oils, such as grapeseed, sesame, almond, or vegetable oils. Make sure they are at room temperature when using them (cold oils will numb relaxed muscles). You can choose one or more volatile oils or buy blended oils. For fragrances, you can choose the following that are considered to have a stimulating effect: cedarwood, cinnamon, clove, rose, neroli, etc. However, please remember, never apply essential oils directly to the skin.
The first step in an oil massage is to have your partner lie face down with their arms hanging a few inches off their body. Their head and neck should be relaxed and not twisted. If you don't have a massage mat or pad, use a pillow, thick towel, or blanket to support their body. Cover your partner's back with a towel or thin blanket and rub your hands together for a few seconds to warm them. Then, pour a few spoonfuls of lubricant into your hands and prepare to gently massage your partner.
For the breasts: It's important to remember that the breasts are glandular tissue, not muscle, so never apply pressure. The method is to place your fingertips in the center of the bottom of the sternum, moving them outwards in short, horizontal strokes, smoothly pushing the oil upwards, but not beyond the breasts. Massaging under or around the breasts can moderately stimulate your partner's libido. Cup your hands and gently cup them around the sides and lower part of the breasts, gently stroking upwards, allowing the breasts to feel like they are in your palms. Circle your fingers around the nipple, then gently glide them over the nipple to gently arouse your partner.
Face: Gently massaging oil on your partner's face can bring a high level of security. Encircle their jaw and chin with your hands and fingers, then push oil up the jawbone to the ears, using your fingers to soothe upward and outward strokes across their cheeks, repeating this several times. Carefully trace the shape of your partner's lips with your fingertips, gently and slowly massaging oil around and on the lips.
Shoulders and back: Kneel next to your partner's head (or stand, if you are using a table), and spend 1 to 2 minutes massaging oil on the top of their shoulders. You will find a series of acupressure points that you can apply to relieve stiffness in the neck. The method is: gently pinch their shoulders, then press two points below their head with your thumbs (about 1 inch from the spine) for 5 seconds, then move down the neck 1 inch at a time, applying pressure. (After a while, your partner will tell you if you are pressing the right spots). Repeat these movements on six pairs of acupoints on the neck and upper shoulders, ending at the hollow of the shoulder bone. Then, place your hands directly on your partner's shoulders and slide your fingers outwards along the shoulders for acupressure.
Legs and buttocks: Move to your partner's lower body and massage their buttocks, firmly kneading the fleshy areas. Grasp and knead the muscles with your hands, and move your thumb and four fingers to the important, thicker areas. Use your two thumbs to separate the gluteal muscles from the hamstrings, and then massage this crease and the lower edge of the hip bone several times. Next, massage each leg from the buttocks to the toes, using a quick, alternating (interval) motion with your five fingers spread, applying slight pressure to the areas with thigh muscles. One point to note: If your partner has varicose veins in their calves, you must be very, very gentle when massaging and avoid pressing on the varicose veins. Next, bend one of your partner's legs and massage the calf with oil. Use both hands to encircle their ankle, pressing firmly
with your thumbs, and knead down to the knee. Finally, massage the entire foot and heel with oil. Repeat this process for the other leg. Arms: Use a back-and-forth flowing motion to massage the top of the arm, from the shoulder to the wrist, keeping your thumb at the top and the other fingers encircling the arm. Try a cross-massage technique and massage the largest muscle in the arm. Then stretch their arm to extend it, massaging the palm and wrist, gently pulling their fingers outward. Repeat the same movements for the other hand.
Head and Neck: Return your hands to your partner's shoulders and spend a few minutes massaging their neck. Then, massage upward into their hair, spreading your fingers out, massaging their entire scalp as if you were washing their hair. Next, with one hand on each side, place your thumb under the ear and the other fingers behind the skull, gently pulling towards you to relax the head. Then massage the ears, alternating between the temples, cheeks, and jawline.
A quick massage of the feet and hands: the feet are incredibly sensitive (and the most delicate), making them a top candidate for a small massage area in front of the TV. Here are two 10-minute routines you can do: Hands—Hold your partner's hands, palms up, and massage their palms. Then turn their hand over and press along the tendons and bones on the back of their hand with your thumbs. Repeat this movement, gently pulling their arm outwards and squeezing each finger like milking a cow. Now, massage the fleshy part of the palm, turning their palm upwards and exploring the muscular areas of their palm with your thumbs. Then, insert your two pinkies between their thumb and pinky, stretching their fingers to open their palm as high as possible. Finally, use both thumbs to massage from the palm to each finger simultaneously. Repeat the same movements on the other hand. Feet – Starting at the ankle, encircle your partner's foot with your fingers and massage oil onto the heel, sole, and outer edge of the foot. Then, use your thumbs to massage oil along the tendons and bones to the front of the foot, using a rubbing motion. Hold each toe with your thumb and forefinger, rubbing back and forth and gently pulling outwards. Press your thumb on the outer edge of their foot below the little toe, holding the pressure for a few seconds. This will stimulate acupoints that relieve shoulder tension. Repeat the same movements on the other foot.
Taking it to the next level: Here are some massage tips: Maintain physical contact with your partner throughout, moving your hands in a rhythmic, gentle motion, allowing each massage session to last a few minutes. The body has a memory for sensations and anticipates them, so repeating the same movements can be incredibly pleasurable. On joints and areas with thinner skin (such as behind the knees), massage along the contours of the bones, avoiding vigorous rubbing. Let your fingers follow the lines of the bone, like on the shoulders. A massage is like a journey of discovery, allowing your hands to feel and experience the contours of your partner's body.

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