In Memory of My Former Beloved (Part 1)

At 25, I had been running my own business for over a year, my life a whirlwind of activity, each day slipping by unnoticed. On my rare days off, I realized how lonely I was. I woke up alone, washed up alone, ate breakfast alone, lunch alone, dinner alone, watched movies alone, watched TV alone, daydreamed alone, living a solitary life in this city. Back then, I always had this saying to comfort myself: "Those on the road to success are all lonely," but I couldn't bear this loneliness. I wanted to be in a relationship.
I started joining some QQ groups, joking and laughing online with other equally lonely and carefree people. One summer evening in 2009, the weather was muggy. The once lively group chat was a bit quiet today, because it was Friday. Couples had all gone to the hotel, leaving only singles. I listened to music, staring at the screen. A message appeared in the group: "Anyone want to go to Chaoyang Park?" A girl, two years younger than me, replied: "I'm nearby." The girl said, "Let's find a friend and go out together." In China, beautiful swans are hard to find, but three-legged toads are plentiful. Instantly, someone volunteered to go on a date too, and the group was formed. We agreed on a time and place, exchanged contact information, took a shower, and headed out . I probably never imagined that this girl would teach me what true love is.
We met promptly at the south gate of Chaoyang Park at 6 pm. Both girls were quite cute; one was slim, had a slightly artsy vibe, and bangs. The other was fair-skinned, with big, pink eyes, and looked like a student (I later learned she really was a student, studying adult education at a university, and working as a cashier at a company affiliated with the university; she later became my beloved, my ex). The activities of a few bored young people were simple: strolling around Chaoyang Park, chatting, and making small jokes. Back then, we were young and passionate, and meeting a beautiful girl always gave us a lot of energy. My friend and I kept showing off, but strolling around the park wasn't very interesting. I suggested: let's go eat. Location: a restaurant in Sanlitun. Result: unanimously approved. Condition: I'll pay! There's not much to say about meals; it was basically about showing gentlemanly manners by asking the girl what she liked to eat and if she had any dietary restrictions, then constantly piling meat and vegetables onto her plate. A relaxed day passed just like that. Of course, adding each other on QQ and exchanging phone numbers was a must.
Later, I would intentionally or unintentionally chat with that pretty girl online, joking around, relaxed and happy. Our feelings for each other were slowly warming up, but I didn't realize it at the time; I was too busy. Another
day off came, and seeing her avatar lit up, I asked: "What are you doing?" "Staring blankly," she replied. "I heard there's a good barbecue place in Zhongguancun, let me take you there." "Do you want to go on a date with me?" she said. I thought for a moment: Yes, a date. Our relationship was established just like that, having only met once and chatted for almost two weeks. Fate is truly wonderful. It
was very hot outside, and I waited anxiously. In the distance, I saw a pretty, pink-haired girl walking towards me; she was still cute this year, slightly shy. I went up to her and held her small hand tightly. "Come on, let's go eat something delicious and drink something spicy."
We skipped the meal itself; she barely ate anything. After about half an hour, she said she was full. There was a watermelon at home that had been sitting there all day, and she was worried it would spoil. "Let's go home and eat watermelon," I thought. "Delicious watermelon, and after I finish the watermelon, I'll eat you," I thought.
She lived alone in her university dorm room, about 16 square meters, with a big tree outside the window. It was a bit cramped with a lot of stuff, but clean and tidy. I sat on the edge of the bed, playing on her computer, chatting, and watching movies.
The sound of rain came from outside; it was raining, the weather was perfect. I forget how it started, but I pressed my lips to hers, kissing this girl who was like a porcelain doll. Her saliva was sweet like honey; I thought it was the taste of love.

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In Memory of My Former Beloved (Part 1)

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