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My emotional troubles, part 2 

Later, when I talked about this with my classmates, it was quite funny (at the time, it seemed funny, typical of teenage boys and girls). They all envied me for having such a sister. Now, thinking about it, it's a sign of poor sex education. I don't know how schools teach this nowadays. In my third year of junior high, our homeroom teacher gave us a sex education class, saying, "You're about to leave school. Some of you will go to high school, some to vocational school, and some will start working, get married, and have children. How can you not understand yourselves and your partners?" Most of us blushed and didn't dare to look up. I was very grateful to our homeroom teacher. Many years later, when I met up with her after graduation, we talked about it. After we graduated, she also decisively resigned and went into business. At the reunion, she looked like a businesswoman and even called a prostitute at a karaoke bar. From the conversation, I felt she was a regular customer. But

I digress. Let's get back to that sex education class. Our homeroom teacher taught biology and had the advantage of bringing two plaster models of male and female genitalia from the lab and placing them on the podium. Most of us had our heads down. "Look up," she said. When he explained male genitalia, he made the girls look carefully, line up to touch it, and talked about reproductive hygiene and marital matters. He did the same when explaining female genitalia. Strangely enough, everyone was very serious and attentive in that class, which had a great influence on me later. I hated wearing condoms during sex afterward, feeling like I was having sex with rubber. Someone asked if I wasn't afraid of my partner getting pregnant. Yes, I was, so I've never stopped my sphincter muscle training. I'm used to it now, and with this foundation, I can control ejaculation at will, so I always use withdrawal later on.

I have a girlfriend in my class. She's not exactly beautiful, but I like her figure. Her breasts are developing, firm to the touch, and not very big. I remember we had sex once; we almost ate the forbidden fruit. If only I had been more forceful! But my penis was weak; I ejaculated before I even took my clothes off. Maybe that's how it is when you're young. That's when I developed a masturbation habit. The first time I masturbated, it hurt a lot. My foreskin wasn't completely separated from the glans; it was stuck together. I had to forcefully pull it off in the toilet. It was quite painful. After that, I did it at least once a day for many years. I only recently broke this habit. I read a news story about a guy in Guangdong who masturbated 40 times a day and died from it. Guys with this habit should be careful and moderate; once a week is ideal. I remember having a nocturnal emission once when I was a child, and then I never had one again. A few years ago, I did a test on myself to see how long it would take to achieve spontaneous ejaculation. It took me a little over two years—pretty scary, right? More than two years of abstinence before I could achieve spontaneous ejaculation.

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