Very Yellow and Violent 2, Unpayable Debt

Last time I used a clickbait title that everyone hates, and I regretted it deeply afterward. My heart is filled with a thousand knots, shame and annoyance are constant companions, when will this sorrow end, who will untie the knot… Having learned
my lesson, I've changed my ways and will not let everyone down again. Okay, let's get back to the point. Why am I writing this here? Is there any meaning to it? I can't help but ask myself repeatedly. To flaunt my romantic and sexual history? There's no need. To sell myself? That's even more superficial. What I want to do is perhaps just record something boring when I'm bored, and through sharing this boring thing, I'm searching for something not so boring. Okay, this is just a process. Just like the question, does love need a reason? Does it not? Does it? The same dilemma, the same answer that only yields no answer. At the same time, like many others who are searching and doing the same thing, I'm simply enjoying the process of sex. Undeniably, I also enjoy this process. Stroking her soft, curvaceous body, my palms felt her slightly upturned nipples, my fingertips traced the soft, fleshy flesh, my lower body responded with a warm, moist, tight, and exhilarating expansion, waves of alluring moans filled my ears, and my eyes met a pair of beautiful eyes, sometimes seductive, sometimes wanton, sometimes dreamy. Nothing around me mattered anymore. The past was forgotten. At that moment, there was only our merging, our penetration, our surging… how exhilarating! Paradise on earth, nothing could compare. This was a road of no return. Searching, enjoying, and losing myself.
Thinking back to the beginning of my lost path, it's been almost 15 years, and recalling it, every detail seems still vivid in my memory. Okay, let's begin! Let's get started, ensuring over 90% authenticity.
Shanghai, the Pearl of the Orient, a fashionable and modern metropolis, is a place where many people's dreams intersect. Girls in Shanghai back then were relatively traditional; let's not talk about those now. At that time, I was only 19, an art major with excellent grades. I was also the school's football star, a master of midfield breakthroughs and powerful shots, winning the hearts of countless cheerleaders on the field. But off the field, I was shy and not good with words. Back then, my life revolved around three things: painting, football, and StarCraft. I had no awareness, nor time, to date female classmates, let alone the casual hookups and hotel rooms that students take for granted now. Okay, let's get to the point. Starting with A, she was a woman four years older than me. Crucially, she was the girlfriend of a middle-aged divorced businessman, a friend of a relative—someone I called "uncle." She was 1.5 meters tall.She was 62, weighed around 50kg, and had a rather voluptuous figure. Years later, I finally understood a key term: waist-to-hip ratio. Her waist was slender, her hips were two sizes larger than her waist, and smaller than her bust. That's roughly how I measured her. Back then, I didn't think about all that; my understanding of women was limited to two things: breasts and face. She had a full bust, large, alluring eyes, a straight nose, and fair skin. We both lived in the alleyways of Shanghai, close by, and often walked past each other. Whenever we met, I couldn't help but glance at her a few times. In the summer, with thin clothes, our eyes would often wander, my gaze lingering on her curves, revealing my vulgar, base, and lowly nature. But, you know, youth is often lewd. Several times, I also noticed her looking at me with intense gaze, making me feel incredibly uncomfortable, as if she could see right through me. Those who could feign composure could only nod and slink away from her. Looking back now, after all these years of fleeting romance, that gaze, beyond its burning intensity, was more of a seductive, drooling expression. Yes, I meant drooling. As it turned out, back then we were all young and handsome, and people did have our eyes on us. Being at the mercy of others wasn't always a tragic fate. Those flirtatious days went on for a long time. Until one time, the alley's electrical system was being renovated, causing a two-day power outage, and things changed dramatically. That night, around 10 PM, I was walking home after playing StarCraft with my classmates. When I reached the alley entrance, I saw her pacing around. I asked her what was wrong, and she said it was too dark in the alley and she was scared. I said, "Why don't you just call your uncle and ask him to come pick you up?" She said he had gone out of town on business and had been gone for two days. I accompanied her into the alley and took her to her doorstep. She invited me in to sit for a while; she was still scared because of the power outage. She found two candles, lit them, and didn't say much, but the atmosphere was a bit ambiguous. It turns out I'm not exactly a good person either, or rather, I'm really bad at conversation. I said it was so dark, what if something or someone ran out at night? She became even more nervous. After hesitating for a while, she finally spoke, asking if I could stay with her until she fell asleep. Before I could reply, she went to the inner room to change into her pajamas. It was already autumn, and the pajamas were a bit loose, clearly showing her full breasts. It was just that the lighting wasn't good enough to see them clearly. She lay on the bed, and seeing that she seemed to be asleep, I really planned to leave, innocently and foolishly. She noticed and said she wasn't asleep yet, and to wait a little longer. Okay, after a while, I dozed off, and she said, "Why don't you stay with me while you sleep tonight?" Holy crap, this was blatant seduction! I asked where I could sleep, and she said anywhere was fine. Holy crap, my heart was pounding. While I was at a loss, she said, "Go wash up first." I felt like I was hypnotized, my mind blank, and obediently groped my way into the bathroom in the dark, quickly washing myself. Then I put on my old tracksuit and came out, still debating whether to sleep or where to sleep. She asked me, "What are you standing there for? It's so dark, it's terrifying!" I said, "Where do I want to sleep?" She actually asked, "Where do you want to sleep?" Of course! I thought about it, but didn't dare say it. Back then, I was an innocent young man, unlike the frivolous middle-aged man I am now. I hesitated for a long time, thinking I should take the initiative, not really like a lamb to the slaughter. Even if it's sending a lamb to the tiger's den, I should do it with style. Various heroic figures came to mind: Jing Ke? Liu Hulan? Really… In the end, I timidly said, "I want to sleep in your… bed." It wasn't intentional; the pause was due to nervousness. It made her laugh, saying that she could tell from the way I looked at her that I wasn't a good person. She shifted her body slightly, and I leaned closer. Between men and women, it's like a thin line; once it's crossed, all sorts of modes and positions are unlocked. She asked if I usually sleep in my workout clothes. Without a word, I took them off, leaving only my underwear, panting heavily, waiting for her next command. She turned slightly, her arm around my chest, stroking it up and down, telling me not to breathe so loudly, it was too noisy. Damn, so coquettish! I wasn't going to be polite either, telling her not to touch my breasts or take advantage of me, or I'd touch her too. She said, "You dare?" Damn, why be polite now, I've already sent out invitations. I reached out and, damn, so big and soft. Maybe it's because the first time felt so good, but afterwards, I became particularly conscious of women's breasts. She gasped, and my scalp tingled; I was afraid someone would call the police… Be gentle! So rough, has she never touched one before or what! "Um, sorry, it's my first time..." Her laughter reminded me of the scene in Stephen Chow's film where Wei Xiaobao is violated by Princess Jianning, and Jianning's smug smile... Still a virgin? Let me see. She then reached down and touched my chest. Damn, a virgin! I'd never seen anything like it. I bent my legs, pulled back, and grabbed her hand. "No, I can't take it," I said. She laughed again. She propped herself up, pressing herself against me, I could clearly feel two soft mounds of flesh pressing against my chest. Our noses were almost touching, and she asked if I'd been eyeing her for a long time. Damn, this position, this situation, she's saying I...! I'm innocent! ...I hugged her waist, and she naturally slung herself over me, me standing between her legs. Don't tell me you don't know what "standing" means; if you don't, go back and brush up on your high school physiology. Then, without further ado, we kissed passionately. The girls at school were kind enough to teach me. I held her tightly; it felt so good. She seemed to be deliberately thrusting her lower body against me, and I thrust back hard. It felt so good. My mind was replaying all sorts of pornographic content, and I quickly crammed on all sorts of knowledge about men and women. Suddenly, my mind went blank, my whole body trembled, it felt so good… I came… Damn, is this my first time? I haven't even gone inside yet… Years later, I still can't figure out if this counts as my first time. Okay, never mind. There'll always be a second time. We'll experience the truth of life again, no, I mean, the physiology of life. She clearly sensed something was wrong and stopped kissing. I said embarrassedly, "I think I came." She laughed nonstop, "Damn, director, what kind of actor is this? He's so out of character! He's not doing his job properly! We're talking about professionalism!" She rolled over and lay to the side, still laughing, "You slut…" She slapped my thigh hard. Damn, I almost came a second time. "Go wipe yourself off," she said with a smile. I quickly hid in the bathroom and wiped myself clean. When I got back into bed, she was naked… "Sister likes you," she said. We were side-by-side, I was pressing against her lower abdomen, and I couldn't help but thrust in and out, really wanting to penetrate her. She sensed my desire and chuckled in my ear, "Sister will teach you..." As she spoke, she touched down and grabbed my penis. "So big and hard..." She chuckled and lifted her thigh, guiding my penis to the entrance, "So wet... Slow down, come in gently." I thrust in hastily, but it didn't go in. She slapped my arm, "You're so clumsy, listen to me, slowly..." Okay, first I pressed against the entrance, slowly squeezing through the doorway, later I learned that it was called the labia, and once it went in a little, I immediately felt a different sensation, so warm and wet, so smooth, so comfortable... It felt so good that I thrust all the way in, and she let out a sound, then fell silent, panting heavily, not saying a word. I was shocked, "What happened? What happened?" She slapped my arm again, "I'm going to die, I told you to be gentle and slow..." Okay, if I fail the exam I have to retake it, I'll retake it slowly... Retake it... Even the teacher wouldn't be able to stand it. She hummed softly, but half a minute felt like half a century to me. I wanted to finish quickly, but I couldn't, I couldn't take it, I'd ejaculate. I wanted to ejaculate, but I couldn't, it had only been a short while, it felt so good… a battle of wits lasting 300 rounds… I said I wanted to ejaculate, and she said, "Hmm, it's okay." I thrust a dozen times, and damn, I got a cramp… my penis cramped, I foamed at the mouth, and lost consciousness… Maybe it was because this time it felt so good, for many years afterward, I preferred to have sex with women a little older than myself. Once comes twice, twice comes three, three comes endlessly… the wisdom of the ancients is invincible. That night we did it six or seven times, but not for long, my penis was too tender, it couldn't withstand the friction. I ejaculated, and soon I got hard again. Once hard, I wanted more. I went in and only thrust a few times before wanting to ejaculate. One moment heaven, the next hell. Especially when she was on top of me, watching her two large, bell-shaped breasts swing back and forth, it was so lewd. I had to hold back… I wanted more, I couldn't hold back… I couldn't take it anymore… I really couldn't… Sigh… Life lessons learned, a sigh from then on… After dawn, she asked me to buy emergency contraception, and that's when I realized the importance of birth control. Later, I learned that it could alter a woman's menstrual cycle and cause discomfort. I also gradually learned about withdrawal and calculating menstrual cycles, so I tried my best to prevent her from taking emergency contraception. She was very touched when she learned this, and whenever she had the chance, she would spend time intimately with me. Until a year later, when our house was demolished, we went our separate ways. Actually, we kept in touch by phone, but we didn't contact each other; perhaps it was a kind of helplessness. Many years later, I met the man I called Uncle, and when I asked, I learned that they had broken up a long time ago. Before parting, he told me, "Now that you're older, be careful, don't do anything too crazy anymore…" I instantly understood; he knew, I had implicated her…! From then on, I never touched a married woman again. I no longer want to enjoy a woman's tenderness and devotion in the name of true love or non-love, through ambiguous or sexual behavior, while simultaneously implicating or hurting her. This is a burden you cannot bear, a debt you cannot repay!I no longer want to enjoy a woman's tenderness and devotion in the name of true love or non-love, through ambiguous or sexual behavior, while simultaneously implicating or hurting her. This is a burden you cannot bear, a debt you cannot repay!I no longer want to enjoy a woman's tenderness and devotion in the name of true love or non-love, through ambiguous or sexual behavior, while simultaneously implicating or hurting her. This is a burden you cannot bear, a debt you cannot repay!

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Very Yellow and Violent 2, Unpayable Debt

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