I'm tired (continued)

Why make things difficult for yourself? Perhaps only I am still entangled and unable to let go.

From initial resentment to current letting go, I've decided to gradually implement my plan, calmly laying the groundwork step by step. I don't know if this is a path to survival or suicide; the choice has never been in my hands. Past infidelities were either confessed to by me or told to me by others; I never witnessed them myself. The following plan is nothing more than finding actual video recordings. After she found out about the affair through the dashcam, she stopped using the car; after she knew I could check her hotel records, she stopped booking hotels. Women become increasingly guarded!

So all of this stemmed from one night when I secretly looked at her Didi (ride-hailing) records. The records showed that she only took taxis to the house she bought a few years ago for her mother's retirement. Later, her mother-in-law took care of her brother-in-law's children and never moved into the house again. So why did she go to the house several times a month? The most bizarre thing is that the taxi records only show the destination and not the return trip! This clue is suffocating me; even a fool could tell that this house is very likely her love nest. The next day, when I went to open the door with the spare key, my suspicions were confirmed. Besides the security door, which could be opened, the lock on another door had been changed. Standing at the door, pondering for the time it takes to smoke a cigarette, I decided I had to open this door. After calling a locksmith, he arrived and delivered devastating news: the lock was a special type, impossible to open without forced entry. Even copying the key was extremely difficult; I'd need to go to a locksmith to get a duplicate! This house hadn't even had basic renovations or appliances yet—was it really necessary to be so cautious? To avoid alerting the locksmith, I let him leave and sheepishly went home to look for the key. Clearly, this idea was naive; over a week later, I'd found nothing. My plan to sneak in and install surveillance equipment was completely ruined! Video recording was hopeless!

While searching for surveillance equipment, I came across GPS location recording devices, but unfortunately, they were too large. To avoid advertising, I won't elaborate on the equipment, but I can only say that as long as it moves, I can know its location and record audio at any time. Now, many readers might wonder why I didn't follow and catch these monsters. My initial intention wasn't to block their door and arrest them; my goal was to gather evidence for negotiation. Having leverage meant I was willing to gamble. If I lost, we'd go our separate ways; if I won, I'd still want to maintain the marriage, but I'd decide how things went.

With the necessary conditions in place, now I just had to wait for her to go out and meet her lover. That night, watching her sleep, I was filled with mixed emotions, pondering who that third man could be. After all these years, she'd only had affairs of no more than three nights. Who could it be? There are many reasons for these three-night affairs: some lost passion, some had ulterior motives, and many were insatiable demands and a little afraid of her—something that hadn't changed over the years. Upon closer examination, the only one who could stand against her for so long was her ex-boyfriend, and the timing was perfect—only someone with a regular work schedule would be so consistent, meeting on Saturday afternoons. The taxi fare matched perfectly. And she never denied having an on-and-off relationship with her ex-boyfriend; for over a decade, he'd been a persistent ghost.

Here, I feel I need to give a special heads-up about what might happen later in the story. As the saying goes, you can guard against your ex all day and night, but you can't guard against them all! Before we got married, my wife had already confessed about her ex. The main reason they broke up was because she cheated on me; in fact, I was the third party in their relationship. At the time, they were already living together, and their parents were old friends. In the eyes of the public, they were a couple without a marriage agreement, and then I, in a very dramatic way, appeared between them. It escalated to the point where I took my wife, broke our marriage agreement, and moved away to a distant place—not far, just a small town in the city. While my wife was living a life of debauchery with me, one afternoon she received a phone call and locked herself in the bathroom, crying for the entire afternoon. Then I learned that her ex-boyfriend had registered his marriage with someone else. I clearly remember the look in her eyes—desperate to find another honest man to take her place after losing a good one—crying pitifully that she wanted to get married too. Looking back, this scheme was incredibly sophisticated: first, she faked a pregnancy and threatened suicide, then her crying and tantrums alerted her parents… and then she told me, like a saint, that she was more virtuous than any other woman! She bullied me, an honest man!

Less than a month after our marriage, she disappeared for half a month. After searching desperately without success, I went to her ex-boyfriend's house for the first time, accompanied by her parents. Upon seeing each other, it was like meeting long-lost friends. Being honest men, we immediately started fighting. When the two of us, honest men, finally calmly discussed her whereabouts through the iron gate in the detention center, I asked my wife if she was with him. I was met with a mocking and angry rebuke. In front of all the brief acquaintances in the detention center, I was told I had been cheated on, and he wasn't the only one. When asked if I was easy to get away with, I was told there were two others before him, and he counted on his fingers, mocking me for being much more honest than him. In the end, it was her father who bailed him out, ostensibly to let me calm down. When he left, he smiled broadly, saying, "Don't worry, I'll be back when the money's gone. They only had a week together, and now she's gone to another province with an online friend." There was even a "thank you"... From that moment on, a grudge was formed, a vow of eternal damnation taking root in both our hearts. In the long years of being constantly cheated on, I forgot about him, but he always lurked in my life. Even during my wife's interrogation, he was still there. When we discussed a threesome in 2016, the plan was abruptly halted because my wife suggested he be with her. She was also told that he had been with multiple men before she met me. From then on, any mention of men in my life was met with silence. That icy state of being suffocated me. Who

can I cry to about this injustice? Once I have evidence, I'll pray that I'll run into someone I know at the Civil Affairs Bureau.

I have everything I need; I hope the outcome is as I wish. I urge everyone to end things decisively, because women become increasingly cunning.

Writing this wasn't easy; to be continued.

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I'm tired (continued)

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