The first time was when he couldn't get an erection.

That was in 1997, 22 years ago. I wonder what things would be like now if history had been different back then, I think about it from time to time.

That year, I had just graduated and started working. The company converted the roof of one of its restaurants (they didn't serve food) into dormitories (they removed the air conditioners and appliances, leaving only the beds), two people to a room. The wages were very low back then, so the only thing we did after work was chat with the waiters downstairs. The waiters were divided into two categories: one was the family members of the company's middle and lower-level managers, who were just there to clock in; the other was recruited from outside the company, who were there to do the work. We didn't dare to mess with the former unless they greeted us first, but in those years, I never encountered anyone who greeted us. The latter were very kind, always smiling, and these were the only people we chatted with. There was a girl named Xiaoliang, who was a little over a year older than me. We got along well. She told me that her family worked for a mining company in the city, mining in the mountains. She didn't want to follow in her father's footsteps and work in the mines, and since she couldn't get into the government offices, she ran away. At the time, I imagined him dressed all in black, wearing a miner's helmet.
A few days after Hong Kong's handover, the weather was still very hot. One night around nine o'clock, I went downstairs to buy something at the nearby night market. I ran into Xiao Liang, who wasn't on duty, and asked her if she wanted to go. She called someone else to come along. After buying the things, that person met an acquaintance on a motorcycle and hitched a ride home. Xiao Liang and I were

left to wander around aimlessly, and somehow we ended up in the neighborhood park. We sat on a bench to rest, chatting idly, when suddenly, an unexpected thing happened. A man and a woman walked onto the grass ahead and started embracing and kissing passionately, oblivious to everyone else. Xiao Liang and I stared at each other, stunned. Xiao Liang stood up and tried to pull me away, but I was too stunned to react. She couldn't pull me away and then her body tilted and fell down. I grabbed her, and my hands were holding something soft. We struggled for a few moments, and just like the couple in front of us, our teeth clashed. It hurt so much! The two quickly separated and walked back one after the other in silence.
After that incident, we would make funny faces and tease each other whenever we met
. Two or three months later, although it was winter, Liuzhou was still very hot, and the top-floor room was unbearably stuffy. One Saturday, my roommate went out early, and I went downstairs to call Xiaoliang up. We sat on the bed chatting, and as we talked, we started talking about that night. Xiaoliang stood up awkwardly, and I thought she was leaving, but she went to close the door! Close the door! When she came back, we were both blushing and staring at each other blankly. Then we hugged and kissed. This time it was much better; I got an erection, so I pulled her down onto the bed. Xiaoliang closed her eyes and didn't move, letting me strip her clothes off. It was the first time I had seen a woman's naked body. The veins on her breasts were clearly visible. I was staring blankly when Xiaoliang tugged at my clothes. I snapped out of it and quickly took off my own and lay on top of her. Her body seemed stiff, like a piece of wood. Tragedy struck; my penis went limp. No matter how I moved, it wouldn't respond. Xiao Liang gave me her usual strange look. I grabbed my clothes and ran to the bathroom—even if it was limp, I could still pee. When I came out, Xiao Liang was already dressed and gone. My first time was impossible!

A few days later, Xiao Liang suddenly disappeared. Back then, there were no cell phones or pagers. I spent half a month feeling utterly dejected. Then, one noon, Xiao Liang returned. She stood at the entrance of the hall and stopped me, saying that her miner father had become an official and was going to work at a mine in Guizhou, and she was going there with him. I blankly said, "I wish you well," and did nothing more. And just like that, she left. It turned out her family owned a mine.

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The first time was when he couldn't get an erection.

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