Real experience (1)

Let me share my experience. My wife and I married in 2011, and in 2018, we broke the conventional rules of marriage. That is, when she was 28, she had a sexual relationship with another man. This decision was something we wouldn't have dared to imagine a few years ago. But even now, it doesn't seem to have affected our family or relationship. Let me start from the beginning. In the summer of 2017, we had a huge fight over some family matters, followed by a cold war where we didn't speak to each other for days. I tried to compromise at night, but she would push me away ruthlessly whenever I touched her. I remember back then, WeChat account verification wasn't so strict; you could register a WeChat account with a QQ number. That night, I suddenly had the idea to register one. Thinking that adding her so suddenly would definitely arouse suspicion, I first added her to a WeChat business group. A few days later, I added her through the group. After asking where I added her, she accepted. And that's when everything unexpected began. At first, I deliberately chatted with her very little, and she seemed unwilling to talk much to this stranger. In real life, because of our last argument, her attitude towards me wasn't very good, which led to another argument. This argument, however, brought about an unexpected situation. The next day, after she went to work, I chatted with her on WeChat out of boredom. At first, she seemed reluctant to talk much to a stranger, but later she chose to confide in me, and I won't go into details. We talked about family and her bad mood after our recent argument. I listened patiently, offering comfort and guidance. This formal chatting continued for a while. The biggest takeaway was that I gained a better understanding of her perspectives and how she handled things. In real life, I also tried to consider things from her point of view, and everything returned to happiness and peace. As we got to know each other better, she started to want to know what this stranger looked like and why we only chatted via text, since she sometimes sent voice messages. For several days, I couldn't figure out what to do and didn't dare to chat. Later, I boldly asked a friend from another city whom I met through online gaming for help. I helped him log into WeChat and asked him to video chat with me, but I didn't tell him the truth. I remember that after I helped him log in that day, I deliberately put down my phone and said I was going to take a shower. My wife answered but didn't say anything, and hung up after a few seconds. Then he actually sent a few voice messages. Actually, my wife's thinking was quite simple; this person had just appeared out of nowhere. She wanted to confirm if the other person was someone she knew. There were a few more video chats like this later. Then I didn't want to chat so politely anymore because we were almost out of things to talk about. I started asking about her private matters and sending her some pornographic photos and videos. At first, she was very angry and refused to answer, threatening to block me. But no matter how much I went too far, she would at most not reply to my messages; she didn't block or delete me. I was busy for a couple of days and didn't chat, but she messaged me saying: "Wow! The sun rose in the west? You've learned not to send pornographic things these past two days?" At that moment, I knew she wasn't really disgusted, but rather that she wanted to slowly wear down her sense of shame. Then one day, we had a deeper conversation. She talked about what positions she liked, that she liked gentle yet rough sex, and asked me many questions about my sex life. I talked to my girlfriend a lot, pretending to be someone I'd lived with for two years but had broken up with. That day, she remarked that she'd never discussed these topics with anyone before and mentioned that she was aroused. In reality, we had sex that night, and she was much more enthusiastic than usual. Undeniably, my libido was also high, and I performed very well. This chain reaction of conversations started to amplify my sexual desire. In subsequent WeChat conversations, I started buying her sexy lingerie and female vibrators. To clarify, we'd used vibrators in real life, so it made sense that she bought them online. Later, I stumbled upon a set of photos online of domestic couples engaging in sexual activity and threesomes—hundreds of them. I mentioned that I'd recently met a married woman and participated in their activities. I sent her a lot of photos, fabricating stories about my interactions and sexual experiences with them. Her reaction was surprise, curiosity, and a barrage of questions. After she understood everything, she said it was disgusting and shameless. After months of talking to my wife like this, pretending to be an outsider, I'm starting to feel lost. What am I doing all this for? She's mine anyway, we sleep in the same bed every day, why bother? But I also feel a little excited. Maybe this is the beginning of cuckoldry thoughts. As for my wife's behavior, it's easier to understand. The mature, stable, and understanding chat at the beginning already made her like him. As for the flirtatious chats later, as long as they weren't insulting to women or used vulgar language, most women wouldn't immediately delete you. Of course, some women are pure and steadfast. So I don't think my wife is a bad woman. Human nature is complex. From the chat, I can tell she has some curiosity about men other than her husband. But she's still very cautious and restrained. For example, how many men who have been married for 7-8 years only have sex with their wives? I don't think any of my friends do, including myself. And when you see a beautiful woman, you think, "Oh! If only I could sleep with her." There's nothing wrong with that thought. It's just fantasizing. In marriage and life, she's praised by everyone; she's good at managing the household, thrifty, and not scheming. She doesn't talk much and is sincere. I usually tell her she's a bit naive and not very shrewd. After a long internal struggle, I decided to bring this fantasy back to reality and find an opportunity to expose her flirtatious chats with other men. Because continuing this conversation through a third party is pointless. Ugh! Writing this makes me feel so despicable.

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Real experience (1)

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