My May-December Romance with a Girl (1-4)

(True story, all names are pseudonyms)

1.
Several years have passed, but whenever I think about it, it feels like yesterday.
I am a university English teacher. One morning in late May 2015, I, then forty years old, met her for the first time when she was seventeen.
That day, I went to visit my son at school. He was in the second year of junior high school and boarded at the school. Every Wednesday was the school's open day for parents, who could enter the campus to visit their children and bring them food, clothes, or other items.
Around noon, after saying goodbye to my son, I walked around the campus. I noticed that men around me were staring at me—parents, teachers, and students. Although I was middle-aged, I was quite confident in my appearance and was used to these kinds of looks.
As I was walking, I heard a girl's voice, "Auntie..."
I stopped and looked over. A tall, graceful young woman was walking towards me. She was wearing a white, fitted, sleeveless short dress, her long, black hair cascading over her shoulders, and low-heeled sandals.
My first impression of her was, "Wow, she's so beautiful! She has a great figure, as beautiful as a saint from the Temple of Zeus in Greek mythology." But I didn't know her, and I didn't know why she called me.
The girl walked up to me and cautiously asked, "Excuse me, Auntie, could you do me a favor?"
I was quite surprised; we were complete strangers, and I didn't know what she wanted me to do.
"What is it?" I smiled slightly.
She looked around and said to me, "Could you... take me out of the school grounds?"
I understood her intention. My son had told me before that because many students were tired of the school cafeteria food, on Wednesdays, parent-teacher meetings, some students without parents would ask other parents, whether they knew them or not, to pretend to be their parents and take them out so they could have a meal and play outside for a while. My son and his classmates had done something like that.
Faced with this violation of school rules, I hesitated and said, "This... I'm afraid it's inappropriate."
"Please, Auntie, just take me out for a bit! I promise I'll be right back after I buy what I need, please!" the girl pleaded earnestly.
Seeing her pitiful appearance, and given my good first impression of her pretty face, I couldn't bear to refuse, so I sighed, "Alright! This won't happen again."
"Thank you, Auntie, you're so kind!" the girl said happily, then waved to a girl of similar age nearby. That girl came over and thanked me with a smile. She was almost a head shorter than the first girl.
I was slightly annoyed, thinking, "I only agreed to take you out alone, not your classmate!" I said to the taller girl, "I didn't agree to take two people."
"Auntie, please be kind, taking one is the same as taking two, isn't it?" she smiled and winked playfully at me.
I felt I couldn't refuse her, and sighed helplessly, "Let's go!"
"Thank you, Auntie," the two girls said in unison.
When we reached the roadside outside the school gate, I noticed the security guard's gaze following the three of us. This was understandable; it happened frequently that parents would bring unfamiliar children out of school, so the guard naturally had to be vigilant.
To avoid being noticed by the guard, I said to the two girls, who were about to thank me again and say goodbye, "Where are you going? I'll give you a ride."
The shorter girl quickly smiled and said, "No need, Auntie."
The taller girl probably understood my intention, tugged at her companion's hand, and smiled at me, "Then thank you, Auntie."
"You're welcome," I smiled slightly, and led the two girls into my car under the guard's watchful eye.
On the way, the taller girl told me to just drop them off at the nearby shopping area, where they would buy two milk teas and two sandwiches before heading back to school.
I asked them, "Why go to all this trouble when we could just order takeout?" The taller girl said the school didn't allow students to pick up takeout at the school gate, and besides, they wanted to get some fresh air; staying at school all
the time was too boring. I asked them what grade they were in, and they said they were in their second year of high school. After the two girls got out of the car and said goodbye, they walked towards a bubble tea shop. I was about to drive away when it suddenly occurred to me that the security guard at the school gate had seen them get into my car, and besides, there were security cameras at the school gate. What if these two girls didn't get back to school on time and something happened to them outside? Wouldn't I be implicated?
Thinking this, I got out of the car and stood by it, silently watching the two girls buying bubble tea. They were chatting and laughing, occasionally playfully hitting each other. I smiled to myself, marveling at how wonderful youth is. My own youthful days, like theirs, are long gone, and before I knew it, I was a mother of a fourteen-year-old boy and a middle-aged woman.
The two girls turned around after buying their milk tea and saw me. They were both a little surprised. The taller girl asked, "Auntie, why didn't you leave?"
I smiled and said, "Since I brought you out, I have to take you back. Otherwise, if anything happens, I can't take the responsibility."
The shorter girl said, "No, Auntie, don't worry. We'll go back by ourselves in a bit, so we won't trouble you."
I knew the two little girls wanted to play a little longer, but I couldn't let them.
"What else do you want to buy? Hurry up and buy it, then we'll go back," I said firmly.
The two girls looked at each other, and the taller girl said, "Okay! Auntie, you wait for us here. We'll buy two sandwiches at that shop."
She pointed to a bakery next door, and I nodded. They went inside.
After a while, they came out after buying their milk tea and got into the car. I drove to the school.
When we got back to the school gate, the two girls and I got out of the car. The security guard from before was still watching us. The shorter girl waved to me and said, "Thank you, Auntie. Goodbye."
I smiled and said "Goodbye," looking at the taller girl. She smiled at me for a moment, then waved, "Goodbye, Mom."
I was taken aback, then immediately smiled and said, "Okay, goodbye."
She smiled sweetly at me, turned, and walked towards the school with her friend. I called out to her retreating figure, "Study hard and get some rest."
She turned back and cheerfully said, "Okay, Mom."
Then the two girls looked at each other and giggled before entering the school gate. Watching their youthful and beautiful figures disappear into the campus, my heart overflowed with warmth, and I silently said, "Goodbye, daughter."
Actually, I've always wanted a daughter, and my husband and I had planned to have another one. But at that time, the country hadn't relaxed the two-child policy, and now that it has, my husband and I are both getting older, so it's just a dream.
At this moment, I have to admit that today's encounter with this beautiful girl awakened my maternal instincts.
At dinner, I told my husband about what happened today, and he laughed, "You brought them out, so why send them back? Isn't that troublesome?"
I explained my considerations, and my husband said I was overthinking it; what bad luck could possibly happen?
I rolled my eyes at him and said, "What if? What if I run into them? I'd be in big trouble, and it might even have a bad influence on our son."
My husband sighed, "Since you're so worried, you shouldn't have pretended to be a good person and agreed to their request. You should have just refused them from the start."
I said, "When I agreed to their request, I didn't think much of it. I only remembered it after we left campus. You wouldn't believe it, that security guard was staring at us like a lecherous old man, his face practically screaming 'class struggle.' I
had no choice but to do it." My husband scoffed, "Mind your own business, always looking for trouble."
I retorted, "Don't you have any sympathy? Your son did something similar, claiming parents randomly. I thought of Mingming back then."
"Anyway, don't do it again..." My husband shoveled a mouthful of rice into his mouth, chewing as he spoke, "This kind of thing violates school rules. If something happens, you'll be held responsible."
"I know! I won't do it again," I said, feeling his warning made sense.
That night, my husband and I had sex. He always does the same few things: kissing, kissing breasts, kissing genitals, then penetration. It's basically always missionary until he ejaculates, maybe doggy style sometimes. Over the years, I've gotten tired of his routine.
It's not that my husband can't satisfy me, it's just that we've been dating and married for over ten years, and our relationship has become increasingly bland and unfulfilling. But I've never considered being unfaithful, even though many men have admired me or even hinted at it.
I often think that most middle-aged couples like us are like this, right?
After we finished, I sat on the edge of the bed and wiped myself with a tissue, complaining that he shouldn't have ejaculated inside. He laughed, "Didn't you say it was your safe period?"
"You can still get pregnant even during the safe period,"
my husband said, hugging me from behind with a grin. "If you get pregnant, just have the baby, right? Haven't you always wanted a daughter?"
"You'll raise the baby?" I rolled my eyes at him, throwing the wet tissue into the trash can next to the bed.
I put on my underwear and a shirt, then walked out of the bedroom. My husband asked me where I was going. I said I was going to have a cigarette.
My husband laughed, "Only men smoke after sex, why would a woman like you do that?"
He never smokes. I smiled and said, "You go to sleep first, I'll be back in a bit."
Actually, I'm not a smoker; I just like to have a cigarette or two when I'm thinking.
Standing on the balcony, I took puffs of my cigarette, my mind involuntarily drifting to that girl. Ever since our chance encounter today, I've thought about her more than once.
I felt strange, wondering why I was like this. Was I attracted to her? I thought, maybe it's because I've always wanted a daughter, and she's so beautiful, so lovable, that's why I'm like this?
At that moment, I thought that I and that girl would probably never see each other again in this lifetime.

2.
I didn't expect that a little over a week later, that girl would contact me.
That day, I had just finished class, and looking at the unfamiliar number on my phone screen, I assumed it was just another sales call and hung up without thinking. A little while later, she called again, and I had no choice but to answer.
"Auntie, it's me..." her voice came from the other end of the line.
I was surprised; I hadn't expected her to contact me. I didn't know why she was calling me. I was even more confused as to how she knew my number.
"You are...?" I asked deliberately. Although I recognized her voice immediately, I pretended not to remember her.
"I'm the girl you took me out that day, do you remember me?" she explained.
I feigned recall and said, "Oh! It's you! What's up?"
I maintained my composure. She said on the phone, "Auntie, can I ask you for another favor?"
"What is it? Want me to take you out of school again?" I laughed.
"No..." she hesitated, then said, "This time it's much more troublesome than last time."
She then told me she wanted me to impersonate her mother and go to the school to see the teacher. The reason was that two boys who liked her had gotten into a fight outside the school because of jealousy, but luckily a classmate reported it, and the school stopped it in time. So the teacher planned to invite her, the mother of one of the boys involved, to the school for a talk.
"What about your mother? Why didn't you ask her to go?" I asked, puzzled, thinking maybe she was afraid to tell her parents.
There was a moment of silence on the other end of the phone before she said, "I...I don't have a mother."
I was startled and asked, "What's wrong?"
She told me that her mother had passed away when she was very young, and her father had always worked in another city. For many years, her aunt had taken care of her.
A wave of pity washed over me, and I asked, "Then...why didn't you tell your aunt?"
She said she didn't want her aunt to know; she had already troubled her enough. I asked her again if no one at school knew her mother was gone.
She said she attended a different school for middle school, and when she enrolled in this school's high school, she still wrote her deceased mother's name in the mother's section of her registration form. Only in this way could she feel that her mother was still with her.
"I'm sorry..." I thought for a moment. Although I sympathized with her, I felt I shouldn't get involved in this kind of thing, and said to her, "I can't help you, because it would be irresponsible of you."
There was another silence on the other end of the phone; I could sense her disappointment. After a while, she said, "It's okay. I know this request is too much trouble for you, but I still want to thank you. Goodbye, Auntie."
She then hung up the phone. I felt a pang of guilt for this girl who had lacked maternal love since childhood and hadn't received any fatherly care during her upbringing.
I felt I was probably the only person she could think of willing to help her in this situation. She trusted me so much, even relied on me, and yet I had refused her. On the surface, it was out of responsibility towards her, but in reality, I didn't want to get myself into trouble. If things were exposed, my son was still studying at that school, and the consequences would be terrible.
After a moment's thought, I called her back. I did this partly because she had stirred my innate maternal instincts as a woman, and partly because the moment she hung up, I felt I might never have any contact with her again. But I didn't want that. Since our encounter, she had been on my mind every day.
"Auntie..." she said with surprise. She was clearly happy that I had called her back.
"There's a question..." I said bluntly, "My son also studies at your school. I don't know if your homeroom teacher has met me? And does she know that I'm actually another student's parent?"
"Auntie, what grade is your son in?" she asked.
"Second year of junior high."
"That's no problem. The teachers in our high school and junior high are two separate groups, and we have a lot of students, over ten thousand. Our teachers definitely wouldn't know you."
I finally put my worries aside and asked with a smile, "I have another question..."
"Go ahead, Auntie," she said with a smile, seemingly in a very good mood.
"How did you get my number?" I asked.
"Oh, this?" she laughed, "I saw it on the sign under the windshield when I got into your car after buying milk tea and a sandwich that day."
Then I remembered that there was always a sign with my phone number on my dashboard, so that if I blocked someone's way while parking, they could contact me. I
thought to myself, she only glanced at it, but remembered it; her memory is really good, and she's really thoughtful.
Before leaving, I deliberately put on some light makeup in front of the bathroom mirror, and even turned around to examine my body in the mirror when no one was around.
That day, I wore a tight-fitting long-sleeved T-shirt, tight jeans, and Adidas sneakers.
Although I'm a middle-aged woman approaching forty, I still maintain a good figure, slender yet full and toned, coupled with a fairly pretty face and stylish chestnut-colored medium-length hair, making me a rather charming mature woman.
I don't know if I cared so much about my image and even put on some makeup because I was going to meet the teacher at school and didn't want to embarrass my child? Or was it all because of her?
After meeting her on campus, she smiled and said, "Auntie, you're here?"
I smiled and said, "Yes, it's my first time pretending to be someone else's parent, I'm a little nervous."
She chuckled and said, "There's a first time for everything, you'll get used to it."
I affectionately scolded, "You little rascal, do you want to keep calling me your mom to fool your teachers?"
"No, just kidding," she laughed, taking my arm and walking into the campus. Our affectionate behavior really made us seem like mother and daughter.
I noticed she was quite tall. I'm not short, 1.63 meters, even considered quite tall, but I'm at least half a head shorter than her, so I guessed she was over 1.7 meters.
"You're probably taller than 1.7 meters, aren't you?" I asked.
She took my arm and said, "Yes, 1.72 meters."
"That's really tall," I laughed. "By the way, what's your name? Don't give yourself away in front of the teachers."
"Ji Meishan, Ji as in discipline, Mei as in beauty, Shan as in arriving late," she smiled.
What a beautiful name. My first thought was, "She truly lives up to her name."
"What year and month were you born?" I asked again.
"January 11th, 1998, I'm seventeen this year," Ji Meishan giggled, then asked, "Auntie, I haven't asked your name yet!"
"You silly girl, how old am I, still asking for a name?" I teased.
"Auntie, you're not old, and you're so beautiful, why can't I have a name?" Ji Meishan said seriously.
"In front of you, I'm old and ugly," I said self-deprecatingly, but I didn't forget to tell her my name, "Auntie's name is An Mei, An for safety, Mei for rose."
"That's not how you see it!" she said, "Auntie An, I've remembered your name, it's quite nice."
All the way there, I was anxious, afraid of being seen by my son, but thankfully I didn't run into him.
Arriving at the teaching building, Ji Meishan said, "Auntie An, could you ask our teacher for leave later? Will you take me out to dinner tonight?"
I asked her if she wanted to go out again. She said no, she mainly wanted to treat me to a meal to thank me for helping her twice, especially this time when I helped her a lot.
I laughed and said, "No need, Meishan. Besides, it's rush hour now, and it will take a lot of time to go there and back. Don't let it interfere with your evening self-study."
By now, I had unconsciously started to call her by her name affectionately, like I would call a junior or even a daughter.
After leaving the teacher's office, I smiled at Ji Meishan and said, "Meishan, you're amazing! At such a young age, you've already got two groups of boys fighting for you. When you're a few years older, you'll be a heartthrob! Are you some kind of reincarnation of Su Daji from 'Investiture of the Gods'?"
"Auntie An, look at what you're saying..." she said coquettishly, clinging to my arm. "I didn't provoke them. They wanted to fight, and I couldn't do anything about it. Besides, I didn't know anything about it."
I patted her hand and laughed, "Auntie was just joking with you. I know you're innocent. But in the future, when you're with boys, try not to let them misunderstand. Don't leave them with any lingering thoughts."
I spoke to her like I was instructing my own daughter.
"Okay, Auntie An," Ji Meishan replied obediently.
She insisted on treating me to dinner another day, and I didn't refuse, because I also wanted to have another chance to see her. So we added each other on WeChat.
At that time, I didn't realize that this action would later plunge us into the tangled mess Li Qingzhao described—a knot that's impossible to untangle, a knot that lingers in the heart even after the knot has been untied.
Reaching the school gate, I said, "Meishan, you should go back now! Auntie's leaving."
"Okay, goodbye..." Ji Meishan waved to me, smiling slightly, "Goodbye, Mom."
I was startled again, then smiled and said, "Okay, goodbye."
As I left the school, I looked back; she was still standing inside the gate, watching me go.
I waved to her, signaling her to go back, and she waved goodbye again. I noticed she wiped away a tear.

3.
That night, after making love with my husband, I told him about it. Normally, we make love twice a week, but sometimes when he's busy with social engagements, we might not even have it once.
My husband laughed, "Mind your own business! You really treat her like your daughter?"
I said, "There's nothing wrong with that. What's wrong with getting a daughter for free?"
My husband reminded me that maybe the little girl was intentionally getting close to me, that she had her own motives. I laughed and said, "You're overthinking it. What does she want from me? Money? From what I've observed, everything she wears and uses is designer brands; her family must be very well-off..."
I thought for a moment and said, "At most, she's lacking maternal love and wants some from me!"
As I said this, I couldn't help but ask myself, from the first moment I saw that girl, I liked her, but did I really like her as a daughter?
A few days later, on the weekend, Ji Meishan indeed called me, inviting me to go shopping and have dinner. I readily agreed.
I dressed up carefully, changing into a light blue floral sleeveless tight-fitting short cheongsam, which accentuated my curves, making my breasts appear even more shapely. The cutouts at the chest revealed a hint of cleavage, and my two beautiful legs were on full display, exuding the charm of a mature woman.
I felt as if I were going on a rendezvous with my lover, and I even felt a flutter in my heart. I don't know what's wrong with me.
We met on a pedestrian street. Upon meeting, I noticed that Ji Meishan had also dressed up nicely, wearing a pale yellow halter-neck mini dress that revealed a bit of cleavage, and her long legs were particularly eye-catching.
I thought she was incredibly beautiful; even I, a woman, was stunned by her, let alone a man.
I jokingly asked, "Won't your teacher scold you for dressing so revealingly?"
Ji Meishan laughed, "I wouldn't dress like this at school. At most, I'd dress like when you first met me."
She still affectionately linked her arm with mine, and we strolled along the pedestrian street. The little girl kept chattering away, as if she had a lot to say to me.
"Auntie An, your breasts are so big!" the little girl suddenly exclaimed, staring at my chest.
I blushed and scolded, "You silly girl, why are you saying that?"
“We’re all women, what’s there to hide?” she laughed. “By the way, you didn’t put anything in your bra, did you?”
As she spoke, she reached out to touch my chest. I quickly pushed her away, blushing, and said, “You brat, others will see.”
Ji Meishan giggled, “Aunt An, I didn’t expect you to be so shy.”
That made my face turn even redder. She asked again, “What size bra do you wear?”
I suddenly realized that she no longer addressed me with the formal “you” and said, “Thirty-six D.”
“That’s really big…” she said, “much bigger than mine.”
I laughed and asked, “So what size do you wear?”
She sighed and said, “B cup, thankfully not an A, otherwise, in the words of those guys, a pair of A’s is too much.”
I couldn’t help but burst out laughing, “Meishan, you’re so funny.”
Her breasts were a bit small, but she hadn’t fully developed yet, and probably hadn’t been touched by guys before, so naturally they weren’t big.
She laughed too. The way we chatted and laughed, anyone who saw us would probably think we were a mother and daughter, and a charming mother-daughter pair at that.
Because I noticed that many of the men nearby, whether passing by or standing still, were giving us stares.
I accompanied Ji Meishan to the shopping mall and bought several pieces of clothing, all quite expensive. I noticed she spent money lavishly, unlike a high school student; I guessed her family was indeed quite wealthy.
While browsing in a shoe store, I saw a pair of sandals I liked and asked the sales clerk to bring them to me to try on. After the sales clerk brought them, Ji Meishan had me sit on a leather stool. She took the shoes from the sales clerk, squatted down, and personally helped me try them on.
The sales clerk smiled and said, "Sister, your daughter is so kind to you!"
Ji Meishan looked up at her and smiled, "Sister, you go ahead with your work? We'll call you when we're done."
The sales clerk left, and Ji Meishan helped me tie the shoelaces. At this moment, her cleavage was fully exposed. Because the opening of her strapless mini-dress was already quite low, and now that she was leaning over, her beautiful breasts, encased in her bra, came into my view.
They were indeed a bit small, but round and full, and exceptionally smooth and white, just like the rest of her skin. For some reason, my heart suddenly raced. It wasn't the first time I'd seen a woman's breasts, yet I felt this way. I didn't understand why I, as a woman, would feel this way. I couldn't help but feel flustered.
Even so, taking advantage of the fact that no one was around and she was looking down, my gaze lingered on those beautiful breasts. Suddenly, she looked up and smiled at me. I quickly looked away, wondering if she had noticed me peeking at her. I felt quite embarrassed.
At the same time, I noticed her gaze fall between my legs and freeze. I knew I was also accidentally exposing myself. Because the hem of my short cheongsam was too short, and I was sitting, she must have seen my underwear.
To make matters worse, that day, because the short cheongsam made my hips very tight, I had specifically worn a thong to hide my underwear. The crotch area was very narrow, and that area was completely exposed.
My face flushed and my heart pounded. I cursed inwardly, "You brat, we're both women, why are you staring at me like that?"
I instinctively closed my legs, and she quickly lowered her head as well. For a moment, the air between us seemed to freeze. To ease the awkwardness, I said, "Meishan, don't squat like that, your skirt is short, you'll expose yourself."
She looked up and smiled sweetly at me, continuing to tie my shoelaces. After trying them on for a while, I decided to buy them. Ji Meishan took out her bank card and said to me, "Aunt An, let me buy them for you? Consider it a thank you for helping me."
I quickly stopped her, "Meishan, you see, I didn't pay for you when you bought things, so don't pay for me either. Let's each pay our own."
She lowered her head a little sadly. I smiled and said, "How about you treat me to dinner later?"
She smiled and nodded.
We went to a Western restaurant, still chatting and laughing. I couldn't help but affectionately stroke her face; we really were like mother and daughter.
Ji Meishan told me about her past. Her mother passed away from cancer when she was in elementary school. Later, her father went to Guangzhou to do business, and in recent years he has done very well, owning his own company and marrying a new wife there. He gave birth to her a three-year-old half-brother.
She also said that after her father had a son, he returned to Changsha even less often, only giving her money and communicating with her less. As she spoke, a hint of melancholy appeared in her eyes.
From the first time I met her, I had sensed a trace of melancholy in her expression; it turned out to be because her mother had passed away early, and her father had given more love to her brother. Although she lacked nothing materially, I felt quite sorry for her and felt even more pity for her.
I asked Ji Meishan if she lived with her aunt. She said she did in junior high school, but after starting high school, she lived at home, usually boarding at school, and often going to her aunt's house for meals on weekends. Sometimes her aunt would come over to tidy up her house and buy her some daily necessities.
I asked her if her aunt was good to her. She thought for a moment and said, "Well, it's alright! But after a while, I could sense that Auntie was getting a little annoyed, so last time I didn't want her to go to school."
Her words made me feel her sadness and loneliness even more. I think that's why she and I, an auntie I'd never met before, hit it off so quickly and became so close.
Ji Meishan then asked me what year I was born. I said I was born in April 1975, and I'm already forty years old. She said I'm two years younger than her mother, the same age as her aunt.
I couldn't help but think that she was indeed like a daughter to me, but deep down I didn't want to treat her as a junior; I preferred to treat her as a friend of the same generation, and a very close one at that.
I excused myself to go to the restroom and quietly paid the bill. As she left, she complained, "Aunt An, why are you like this? You said I was treating..."
"You're still a student, how could I let you spend money?" I said, gently patting her cheek and laughing, "It's okay, you can treat me next time."
She smiled sweetly, "Sure, hehe..."
I deliberately teased, "Look how happy you are, so you weren't really treating me sincerely? Just saying it?"
She looked at me and smiled, "Because this way, I can have another chance to be with you."
Her words and gaze made my heart race again.
On the way home, driving Ji Meishan home, she said she was very happy today, the happiest day since her mother passed away.
I smiled and didn't say anything, focusing on driving. She then asked if she could play with me often. I laughed and said, "Of course!"
She smiled sweetly and looked at me, asking, "Your husband won't be jealous, will he?"
My heart skipped a beat, and I stared at the windshield, laughing, "Why would he be jealous?"
She laughed, "I mean, will he be unhappy because I'm taking up too much of your time?"
I laughed, "How could that be?"
All the way there, despite trying to force myself, my gaze kept drifting involuntarily to her cleavage and bare thighs.
Outside her apartment complex, she kissed my cheek, waved, and said, "Goodbye, Aunt An."
I smiled back at her, "Yes, goodbye, go to sleep early."
Watching her figure disappear into the night, I was still in a daze, and I couldn't help but touch the cheek she had kissed, feeling a little burning there.

4.
As soon as I got home, I received a voice message from Ji Meishan on WeChat, asking if I was home yet.
Since my husband was home, I hid in the bathroom of the master bedroom and replied that I was home. I then asked her why she wasn't asleep yet, as it was quite late.
She said she couldn't sleep. I asked why, and she said she missed me. My heart skipped a beat, and I thought for a moment before replying, "You silly girl, why are you missing me again after we just parted?"
She said she didn't know, she just missed me. I became increasingly distracted and asked, "How much do you miss me?" She said, "
I miss you so much." I said I missed her too. She asked, "Really?" I said, "Of course." She seemed to be pressing her advantage, suggesting we meet again tomorrow.
I really wanted to say yes, but reason told me I shouldn't. I said I was going to my in-laws' house with my husband and son tomorrow. I wasn't lying; I really did have that planned for tomorrow.
She was clearly disappointed and sent an "Oh." I could only say, "We can meet next weekend."
She giggled and said, "Okay, it's a deal then." As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted it. I asked myself if I shouldn't have agreed to see her again .
I tried my best to sound like a mother, saying, "It's getting late, go to sleep." She said, "Okay! But I want you to hold me while I sleep." I was truly going crazy for her, and said, "Okay, I'll hold you while I sleep.
Hehe, goodnight." She said that last thing.
Putting down my phone, my heart was still pounding, and I unconsciously reached into my underwear.
I realized that those few sweet words from our WeChat conversation had already aroused me. I was frantic. How could I have such feelings for someone of the same sex? In my forty years of life, this was the first time, and it was with a girl almost twenty-three years younger than me, old enough to be my daughter?
Still in a daze, I turned on the water to fill the bathtub and then took off my clothes and lay down inside. I began to caress myself, starting with my breasts and gradually moving downwards, exploring between my legs…
I gently kneaded and rubbed there, my mind filled with Ji Meishan's beautiful and delicate face, her tall and graceful figure, her small and exquisite breasts and cleavage, her long, bare, snow-white legs…
After the climax, I calmed down and wondered if I should see her again. I tried to convince myself that I only saw her as a daughter, and that she was only seeking maternal love from me. But I knew that at least my feelings for her weren't as simple as I thought.
Reason told me that this was dangerous, but I was already somewhat unable to stop myself. Moreover, lacking maternal love, she seemed to be unable to live without me now, and if I were to end our relationship abruptly, it would undoubtedly be cruel to her.
I felt that perhaps this was the only reason I should continue to see her.
The next weekend came quickly, and Ji Meishan and I met up again.
In recent days, we had often chatted on WeChat, talking about everything under the sun, sharing interesting stories, and even joking around, like mother and daughter, yet also with a hint of romance.
I hesitated for a long time about whether to meet her, but reason repeatedly gave way to my desire to see her. I looked forward to this weekend, yet I dreaded its arrival.
In this situation, I could only tell myself that as long as I kept my feelings for her within the bounds of my feelings for my daughter, and treated her like a mother and daughter, everything would be fine. But I was too naive back then.
That day, we arranged to meet in another shopping district. We had a buffet lunch, and then went to see a 3D movie. Everything was natural and within control.
But during the movie, Ji Meishan took my hand, and gradually our fingers intertwined. My heart skipped a beat, and I glanced at her furtively. She looked at me too, and we couldn't see each other's eyes through our 3D glasses. She smiled sweetly at me.
I comforted myself, thinking that perhaps many close mother-daughter relationships are like this?
After the movie, she invited me to her home to cook and eat together. I agreed without much thought because I felt it was normal between two close female friends, and I had been waiting to meet her for a week; I didn't want the meeting to end so abruptly.
We went to the supermarket first, then drove back to her apartment complex, carrying bags of groceries upstairs. We chatted and laughed all the way, just like any ordinary mother and daughter.
I felt that our relationship was as close as that of a mother and daughter, but with an added layer of open communication, like best friends, or perhaps even a friendship across generations. I liked this feeling and was happy to define our relationship this way because it made me feel no pressure.
When we arrived at Ji Meishan's home, she asked if I wanted to take a shower. It was already June, and the weather was quite hot; I really wanted to shower, so she put her arm around my shoulders and led me into the bathroom.
She pointed out the towels—which one was for washing my face, which one was for showering—as well as the shower gel, shampoo, and so on. She then asked if I minded using her towels. I laughed and said, "Of course I don't mind!"
"Okay, go ahead and shower! I'll go out first," she laughed, leaving the bathroom.
I closed the door, took off my clothes, and started showering. I didn't press the lock button on the spherical door because I felt it was unnecessary since we were both women, and I didn't want her to feel like I was guarding against her.
But as I was applying shower gel, Ji Meishan suddenly came in. I scolded myself inwardly; I should have locked the door earlier.
I felt quite embarrassed being naked in front of her, covering my chest with one hand and my lower body with the other, turning slightly to the side, and muttering, "What's wrong?"
She laughed and said, "I want to take a shower too."
"Wait a minute, I'll be done soon..." I could only say, meaning she should leave first.
Unexpectedly, she laughed and started taking off her clothes, laughing as she did so, "Why don't we shower together? We're both women anyway, it's okay!"
She quickly stripped naked and walked towards me. My heart pounded, and I couldn't bear to look directly at her naked body, so I moved aside a little to make it easier for her to shower. She openly displayed her naked body in front of me, and I couldn't help but look at her.
The girl's figure was truly stunning—tall, slender, with long, enviable legs, not an ounce of excess fat on her body. Her breasts and buttocks were petite yet full and perky, and her flat stomach was covered in soft, lush hair. She was incredibly alluring.
I relaxed; after all, we were both women, and if she was so natural and confident, why should I be shy in front of her?
We chatted and laughed as we washed. I laughed, "Your figure is amazing!"
She laughed back, "Your figure is great too!"
"Great? Compared to you, I'm practically fat," I said.
"You're not fat at all! Just a little plump, and with such big breasts, men would absolutely adore you," she giggled, suddenly touching my chest.
I blushed instantly, pushed her groping hand away, and spat, "What are you doing, you brat?"
She laughed, "We're all women, what are you shy about? Your husband can touch me, so why can't I?"
I laughed and scolded, "Touch your own if you want! It's not like you don't have any."
"Not as big as yours..." she said confidently, thrusting out her small breasts towards me, "If you feel you're being taken advantage of, I'll let you touch me back."
I reached out as if to touch her, but stopped, laughing, "I'm too lazy to touch you."
"Oh! Still shy?" she laughed, and touched my chest again.
"You brat, aren't you done yet?" I feigned anger and reached for her chest.
She quickly crossed her arms and turned away, laughing, "I won't let you touch me..."
I pulled her back, laughing, "Don't dodge..."
She continued to dodge, giggling, "I won't let you touch me, I won't let you touch me..."
In the midst of our playful banter, we stopped, standing very close, gazing at each other, as if we could hear each other's heartbeats. She was half a head taller than me, looking down at me as she kissed me.
My heart pounded even harder; I wanted to pull away but couldn't move.
Just as Ji Meishan's lips were about to touch mine, reason returned to my brain in that instant. I turned away, grabbed a towel and clothes, and fled the bathroom.
I quickly dried myself and put on my underwear. She came out, still naked, and asked, "What's wrong?"
I didn't answer, quickly dressed under her gaze, grabbed my bag, and headed for the door. She grabbed the hand holding my bag and asked, "Anmei, what's wrong with you?"
I looked at her, surprised and uneasy. Surprised that she no longer called me "Auntie" but addressed me by my first name, and uneasy about the intense look in her eyes. I said, "We shouldn't see each other anymore."
This time it was her turn to be surprised. She said blankly, "Why? Because I kissed you just now?"
"Not only that..." I said, "but also because..."
I paused, then added, "I don't want to continue this ambiguous relationship with you."
After saying that, I pushed away her hand that was gripping my wrist, opened the door, and left.

(To be continued)

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My May-December Romance with a Girl (1-4)

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