After knowing each other for 20 years, I am finally his lover!

Today is Qixi Festival (Chinese Valentine's Day), and typhoons have been raging through the Yangtze River Delta region, bringing torrential rain and strong winds! YZ City is truly experiencing a whirlwind of wind and rain. It's also the first time I've realized that even my voluptuous figure could be swept away by the wind.
On such a festive day, I was surprised to receive a message from T, and I'm writing this to commemorate the most wonderful person in my heart. T doesn't live locally, so we rarely see each other. When I think of him, I just send him a message. This afternoon, he sent a simple greeting and blessing, then asked if I'd done anything wrong lately, and repeatedly warned me to stay calm. I'm definitely more obedient in front of him, but when we're having sex, I'm never obedient.
T is my high school classmate. Twenty years ago, during that summer vacation, I spotted him at first sight in the crowd of people doing military training. A tall, thin scholar, fair-skinned, with captivating eyes, he fulfilled all my budding sexual fantasies. To get closer to my dream man, I often hung around him. He neither took the initiative nor rejected me. I knew he didn't like me at all, yet I still pursued him relentlessly for three years, even going so far as to play the role of someone helping him woo his girlfriend. There was no "however"... no "later"... but we had a more direct relationship. In my opinion, this relationship was happier than being lovers.
The year we graduated from university, T and I were both going through relationships that were about to end. Two restless souls, two passionate bodies, inexplicably decided to have a passionate release. For me, it was like winning the lottery, absolutely perfect. Heaven knows how much I wanted to have sex with T, even just once, I'd be happy just to beg him to look at me.
Skipping the complicated courtship process, on the day we met, we dated like a couple, or rather, like old friends. I remember ordering a medium-rare steak, and T asked in surprise how much I liked raw meat? Yes, he was implying I was a young, fresh-faced guy. Seeing me finish my meal so quickly, he hurriedly led me to a hotel. That year was August 2004, our first time, but neither of us was each other's first.
For over 2000 days and nights before this, we hadn't even touched a finger, yet because of our own desires, we were about to strip naked and roll together, sharing a passionate lovemaking. He said he was nervous, and I said I was too, but there was also a sense of triumph at finally getting what I wanted. In his presence, I always seemed to be a lustful figure, drooling unabashedly.
He went to take a shower first, and I sat on the edge of the bed, lost in thought. Back then, I was a little shy, feeling it was a shameful thing. But I truly didn't want to miss out, I wanted to satisfy him, and I thought that even if I couldn't win his heart, at least my body could make him like me, make him unable to let go… A little while later, he came out wrapped in a towel, his hair wet, the faint scent of a man making my face instantly flush and burn. I turned and hid in the bathroom. When I finished showering and dried myself, hesitating whether to come out wrapped in a towel, he said he had already seen me naked in the mirror, and there was no need to hide anymore.
The two beds in the room were pushed together. He lifted a corner of the blanket and said, "Come in, don't get cold under the air conditioner." I felt like a puppet on a string, nervously crawling in with my bath towel still on, nestled next to him. I swear, that was the first time I'd ever been so close to the man I loved. I was terrified he'd think I wasn't a virgin, and even felt a deep sense of guilt. T gently pulled away the towel and began a passionate kiss. I never knew kissing the one I loved could be so sweet. A strong dizziness washed over me, making me moan involuntarily… Every cell in my body was throbbing, bursting forth with passion, radiating from my hairline. My scalp tingled with excitement, and I was lost in T's caresses and kisses. His fingers were long and slender, with distinct knuckles. Wherever they touched, I would moan softly. He loved hearing me moan, shy yet excited, which thrilled him.
From lips to chest, T kissed and praised, "I knew you were well-developed, but I never expected you to be this beautiful!"
"Do you like it? Are you starting to regret not taking me sooner?"
...
I didn't expect that as we talked, T would suddenly shift his focus, kissing my vulva directly, sticking out his tongue to tease my clitoris and lick my labia. My whole body trembled as if electrocuted, and I shyly squeezed my legs together, both excited and wanting to refuse, caught in a situation that was both irresistible and embarrassing. Before him, I had never properly experienced something so wonderful, so much so that in that instant, I believed that T also liked me and had feelings for me. My lower body was already wet, and T couldn't wait to penetrate me. I said, "Let me serve you." Then, I awkwardly touched his penis, which was thick, hard, and quite large. I later learned that he needed a 56mm Durex to feel comfortable.
I wanted to give T all my love, licking his glans like in porn movies, occasionally putting it in my mouth. Every time my lips enveloped his penis, my tongue swirling around the glans, he couldn't help but moan. Then I took it in a little deeper, not knowing it was called deep throating, but I knew he was about to reach his limit. He held me passionately, saying his ex-girlfriend had never made him feel this good. I rolled over, pressed down, and thrust in. The lubrication from his semen made it easy for him, and the wetness and tightness inside made him cry out too. In that moment, it sounded like his soul had left his body.
Youth always leads to reckless, frenzied thrusting. We kissed, changed positions, but T was always in the dominant position, pinning me down and fucking me fiercely. Maybe it was release, maybe it was stimulation, maybe it was revenge on his ex-girlfriend, maybe it was a little bit of affection for me… In the end, it all came out inside him, his penis still hard, blocking the entrance, unwilling to come out. After a while, thick semen mixed with his vaginal fluid, gushing out… That time, I had the urge to have a child with him. After struggling for a day, I succumbed to the "emergency contraceptive."
This experience is the most unforgettable for me, and I'm incredibly grateful that I gave my best sexual experience to the person I loved most during the best years of my life. Although it wasn't the first time, and although many techniques were still untapped... that year, we were so young, we didn't talk about love, yet our sex was so harmonious and intense!
After that, we tacitly lived our single lives, each dating, getting married, and having children, silently avoiding each other. We thought we could live peacefully, keeping our secrets. But a few years later, misunderstandings arose, we had unpleasant experiences, and we even lost contact... But now, we're back together.
I often feel guilty for seducing a decent man, and he always comforts me, saying it wasn't my initiative, but his passion to be with me. He says he can't accept just anyone's advances, and then he always puts on a haughty expression!
Now, I am indeed a woman who craves sex and lacks love, promiscuous but not promiscuous, with no intention of hiding my primal desires, which has deeply hurt him. But I found myself unintentionally opening another window: he really enjoys listening to my stories about other men (five times), even offering to see videos and photos of me making love with others, yet he doesn't want to hear the fact that I've had another affair. This process is agonizing, both heartbreaking and exciting…
I'm confused: should I continue enjoying casual sex within safe boundaries, or become his only lover? It seems only he can make my heart return! Should I continue to cling to him?

PS: Original content, please do not repost, please do not disturb, and do not question the authenticity. Thank you for your understanding!

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After knowing each other for 20 years, I am finally his lover!

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