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A true record of my interactions with my older brother and sister-in-law in Beijing (Original Part 2) 

About three or four days later, my brother asked if I was free on the weekend to meet up and chat. I said Saturday would be fine, since I have to work Monday through Friday. He told me, "Your sister-in-law's period ended a week ago, and I haven't touched her. I want to, but I fall asleep as soon as the lights go out at night. Try touching her on Saturday and see how she reacts." I said, "Brother, it's our first meeting, shouldn't we get to know each other a bit?" He said, "It depends on how you feel. If you both feel good during dinner, find an opportunity to buy some lubricant or something after dinner." I said, "I know massage, but I don't." He said, "If you don't know how, just touch her randomly." I said, "Okay, I'll learn." Now I understand why so many people in 69 (a Chinese online community for men and women) start with a spa. It really is the most direct way for strangers to break down their last line of defense. I have to admit that this method can lead to a natural and effortless relationship. Anyway, let's continue. With two more days, I watched various spa videos on different websites, even grasping the core idea of Kato-sensei's two-finger massage technique. He was more diligent than I was when I took the college entrance exam. He knew exactly how to start, the process, and the techniques. In two days, I felt I had the theory and process covered, and I'd mastered the techniques. All that was left was practice. On Saturday afternoon, I embarked on my journey to Tongzhou with incredibly mixed feelings—excitement, a little fear, in case I fell for a honey trap. My brother said he was staying in Ximazhuang and asked me to come to the vicinity. I asked him what we wanted to eat that night, and he said that since we're all from the north, barbecue and drinks are the best way to build rapport. He said that we're often too reserved to chat properly over a proper meal. I said okay. I asked what my sister-in-law liked, offering to buy her something. My brother said, "Don't buy anything indiscriminately; it feels bad, like selling your wife. I'll treat you to a meal, young man." I was so touched I almost cried. But in the end, I paid the bill. I felt that if I always paid for meals, where would I put my face? It wasn't about the extra 500 or 800 yuan for the meal; it was about the way things were done, and I couldn't be careless. I drove all the way to Ximazhuang on the Tongyan Expressway, making sure to get a haircut and shave beforehand. I found a barbecue restaurant near Ximazhuang in Tongzhou. I prioritized the ambiance when searching on Dianping (a Chinese review platform), because these days, the environment is the most important thing when eating out; the taste is secondary. A clean and stylish look is paramount. With so much food available now, who cares what they eat? When I arrived, I found a small, secluded booth. I texted the waiter, who said it was nearby, only 10 minutes away, and everything was ready. Actually, it was only 8 minutes when a rather chubby, fair-skinned man with tattoos on his arms and a necklace of various stones and beads entered. He looked quite imposing, and he had some kind of beaded bracelet on his wrist. I knew I was in trouble. I texted him which table I was at, and he walked straight towards me. I wasn't afraid at first, because I'm a retired reconnaissance soldier. Even though it's only been two years, I can easily take on an average person, even if I don't have a decisive advantage, at least resulting in a draw. But I was still a little nervous, worried that someone else might be behind me. Although the older brother looked rather fierce, he came over with a smile, so I pretended to be calm and stood up. "Brother, you're here, have a seat." I proactively extended my hand to shake his. The older brother gestured towards the door, "Over here, over here." I looked towards the door, (let me describe from bottom to top, beauty is judged by the thighs) a beautiful woman dressed for early summer, wearing flat sandals with bows, and short hot pants, very short, almost reaching her upper thighs, not tight-fitting, more like casual loungewear. Two straight, slender, white legs, the kind of white that shows faint purple veins. She wore a loose hip-hop T-shirt, so the shorts were barely visible, practically invisible when she sat down. She wore very light makeup, and her hair seemed to be casually tied up in a rough knot and then draped over her chest from one side of her shoulder. She had bright, single eyelids, and beautiful features, mainly fair skin. My first impression was that her chest wasn't large, but it was very proportionate to her figure. She was about 1.63 meters tall, definitely under 100 pounds. He was wearing a diamond ring over 1 carat on his hand, and carrying the latest iPhone from back then, which he upgraded to the latest iPhone 12 Pro this year. Apparently, he buys every new model since the third generation, and never sells his old one. Although I was already on the verge of high blood pressure from looking at him, I forced myself to remain calm and respectfully said, "Hello, sister-in-law." Unexpectedly, he replied, "Are you Leonardo DiCaprio?" He's been using eunuch-like terms in the game. I had no choice. I called out to order. This barbecue restaurant uses QR codes on the tables to order, and I scanned mine first. Then I said I didn't need to use a gun, and I covered the QR code with my hand. His wife said, "You're eating at our doorstep, how can you pay? You can pay when we get to your house." I said no, you can pay later if you want, but I have to pay for the first meal. The older brother said it doesn't matter who pays, hurry up and order, order less, it'll be a waste if we can't finish. We ordered meat skewers, tendons, peanuts, edamame, and some oysters to replenish our energy. I ordered 12 oysters. My sister-in-law said the oysters were expensive and wouldn't let us order them, but I said it was fine, how expensive could they be? It was clear that although they weren't short of money, they were very genuine. This couple was truly sincere in every way. I asked my brother what he wanted to drink, and my sister-in-law said, "What else can we drink with barbecue skewers but beer?" Then she ordered three bottles of Taishan 7 Days. She likes beer, especially craft beer, and never drinks soft beer because she says it's too bitter. My brother said, "You drink beer first today, and my brother and I will get some baijiu." He told the waiter to bring four bottles of strong liquor, two small bottles each. My sister-in-law said, "With oysters and strong liquor, aren't you afraid of going bald?" I said from the side, "No wonder my brother likes Huang Zhong (a famous Chinese general), the artilleryman needs replenishing." My sister-in-law replied, "Huang Zhong isn't here to drink, he's here to replenish his cannonballs." This kind of genuine and unpretentious humor and affability is truly exceptional; I wonder how my brother managed to find such a wonderful person. He's incredibly lucky. It's also clear that he dotes on his wife. As the dishes were served, we began our meal amidst lively banter and laughter. (To be continued)

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