A mixture of feelings

I don't know if my situation is unique, or if every husband goes through this at the beginning.

I've been involved in this cuckolding stunt for almost ten years now, from initially asking my wife about her sex life with her ex-boyfriend, to now filming sex tapes. From initially calling me a pervert every time I asked, to now her fantasizing about cheating, fantasizing about being the female protagonist in a sex tape, fantasizing about becoming a wanton woman! I must admit, this process has been long and arduous.

And I, as the instigator, have gone from occasionally asking to being unable to live without it. From initially getting an erection instantly just from talking about it, to now needing a specific person and specific stimulation to ejaculate. I feel that even fantasies are no longer enough to satisfy me; I really need my beloved to actually do it, to actually seduce a man, to rekindle my passion for sex.

Of course, during this process, there will be periods when I think about it intensely, and periods when I feel guilty. The hesitation and uncertainty are gradually diminishing. I've asked myself countless times: Are you really sure you want to do this? Are you sure you'll still love her more if she becomes a slut? These
repeated questions have made me absolutely certain: Yes, I'm sure I want her to go find someone else, to add new fuel to our peaceful married life.

Of course, I know I'll feel heartache and reluctance when she's actually in someone else's arms. But I'm certain these feelings won't outweigh the passion I need.

Wife, I am absolutely, truly certain I want to send you to someone else's feet, and I'm certain you'll be even more satisfied.

In this process...

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A mixture of feelings

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