A month of living together as a couple and a single man

It's been a long time since I've been to the amusement park. Lately, I've been troubled by many things. Therefore, I've come back to the amusement park to vent... I might be criticized, but for me, it's a way to release my frustrations...
On November 24, 2013, with my girlfriend's consent, I wanted to hang out with a single guy over the weekend… I was a little excited, so that evening I chatted with all the single guys I knew online. Ultimately, I chose two single guys I'd been chatting with for a while, just in case they were busy, so I could be selective on Saturday. The next day, after talking to my girlfriend at noon to check if she was in a good mood and if we could hang out. In the afternoon, while resting with my eyes closed, I scrolled through my phone and found a single guy. I asked him a few more questions (basic information), and after chatting for a while, I learned he was a college student, 185cm tall and 65kg, with a pretty good build and good looks. At the time, I thought this kind of single guy definitely met my girlfriend's requirements (given that my previous single girlfriends hadn't been satisfied), so we continued chatting… Time flew by, and before I knew it, it was evening. It was raining a little outside. I seemed quite curious about this single guy, and without thinking much about it, I called him and asked him to meet me at a nearby KFC…
When my phone rang, he was already at KFC. I had been busy for a while and didn't have time to go to KFC, so I asked him to come to my rented apartment to chat for a bit (actually, this was a bit irrational at the time). We talked for a long time in my apartment, including work, studies, hometown, sexual experiences... It felt pretty good, even better than I had imagined. Thinking that my girlfriend would be getting off work soon, I took him (out of consideration for students) downstairs to KFC to get something to eat... When ordering, I asked him what he wanted to eat and if it was enough... He wasn't coy or pretentious and honestly told me that he was a little hungry and the portions were a bit small, so I deliberately ordered more... While eating and chatting, we talked about many topics other than sex, including English and some other languages that we both liked, design that he and his girlfriend got along with... and so on! We talked a lot like that. We originally planned to go to a hotel, but then I thought that going to a hotel might make things too direct, so I bought some red wine and we went straight to the apartment.
Back at the apartment, we continued chatting and drinking, and even downloaded some porn to watch together. He was very considerate of my feelings, so his movements and actions weren't overly exaggerated... Seeing how much my girlfriend enjoyed it, I didn't feel much resistance myself. Perhaps it was at that moment in bed that my long-dormant bisexuality was awakened; I found myself unable to control my hands, my eyes... My girlfriend, who hadn't had an orgasm in a long time, reached climax after climax under his efforts... It lasted an hour and a half before the passion gradually subsided... That night, only my exhausted girlfriend slept soundly, while he and I suffered from insomnia...
On Sunday morning, we had another passionate encounter, but I didn't participate much. I only flirted a little... at the time, just wanting my girlfriend to be happy... Later that day, I wasn't in a rush for him to go back to school. In the afternoon, we were bored, so we watched a movie, went shopping, and had dinner... Until evening, the three of us returned to the apartment... That night, the three of us inexplicably talked about many things: his hidden secrets, false information, and I even inexplicably brought up my homosexual feelings for him (I kissed his forehead during sex, and my girlfriend felt it)... He neither rejected nor accepted... We talked like this until dawn before we finally rested, ending our first threesome.
Later, I would invite him to my apartment for three days every week… Actually, we didn't have much sex during those three days; we mostly chatted, ate together, and then slept together. Suddenly, I felt a strangely good feeling… From his initial refusal to kiss or touch me, to our later passionate exchanges, even oral sex… I realized my feelings for him were stronger than for my girlfriend. During this time, I was also jealous of his ambiguous relationship with my girlfriend (her feelings for him were obvious; she really liked him), which created an awkward and unpleasant atmosphere. But who would be so open and honest in the face of love…? At one point, I thought he accepted me because he wanted to enjoy my girlfriend's body more… However, I later discovered that even when we were asleep at night, he wouldn't take the opportunity to touch my girlfriend inappropriately…
And so, the three of us have been together for almost a month. There were many awkward situations along the way, but they all eased up later… I've discovered I really like him, and my girlfriend likes him too. He'll take off his coat for me on the street in winter, he'll get drunk with me, smoke with me, and work out with me to build muscle… He'll also get up at 6 a.m. to make breakfast for my girlfriend and get up in the middle of the night to get her water… All of this suddenly makes me, someone who's usually very rational, feel confused… I can't tell if this is a game or what… My girlfriend and I are constantly distracted, and he's not focusing on his studies… I'm caught in a dilemma.
So I suggested ending the game, afraid of getting too involved and also afraid of betraying my girlfriend... But it seems I've hurt someone's feelings in the process...
Everyone says you can take it and put it down... but it's easier said than done. For over a week since we separated, I've been dreaming about the three of us every day...

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A month of living together as a couple and a single man

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