"Scent of Incense" - Chapter 148: If I Were Not Me

Everything unfolded just like a story; Fei Yuan desperately wanted to reject Song Wen, but she couldn't bring herself to say it. She even felt herself becoming increasingly infatuated with the occasional sweet and romantic gestures he made.
Her parents even seemed to have already decided that they would be together. Even Song Wen's mother wanted to have dinner with her, but she declined with various excuses.
The Lunar New Year is approaching, and the festive atmosphere on the streets is growing stronger. Everywhere is decorated with lanterns and colorful decorations, all in anticipation of the long holiday that is a rare treat during the year.
“The New Year is almost here.” Naturally taking Fei Yuan’s hand, Song Wen stole a glance at her.
He could sense that she was no longer as distant as before, but every time he finally felt that she seemed to have softened, she would arm herself up again the next moment.
"Yes, that's right," she replied softly, without shaking off his hand.
His palms were warm, and they warmed her hands, which were not easily warmed. They strolled around aimlessly, without any destination in mind, but they didn't feel bored.
After stealing another glance at Fei Yuan, Song Wen couldn't help but clear his throat before mustering his courage.
"Um... I didn't mean anything by it." He hesitated before speaking, then couldn't help but glance at her again.
"Hmm?" His expression piqued Fei Yuan's interest, and she wanted to know what he wanted to ask.
"Um, I just wanted to ask. After the New Year, are you going back to work in the city?" If so, will she only be able to come back once in a long while?
He didn't mind seeing her only once in a long while, but he figured there would be many outstanding men around her. What he feared was whether she would slowly forget him.
Fei Yuan, who hadn't thought about work for a long time, stopped in her tracks. She forgot that Song Wen was still holding her hand, so she naturally grabbed Song Wen's arm as he walked forward. Song Wen, who was being pulled back, first looked at her hand, and then looked at her in the same direction.
Song Wen's face, brimming with worry yet also a hint of expectation, seemed ridiculous to her, as if she knew exactly what he was thinking. Was he worried? Worried that she would forget him once she went back?
"Song Wen, I'm not actually the person you think I am. I'm not as good as you imagine." The words slipped out unconsciously. She wanted him to know that she wasn't as wonderful as he thought.
But then what? What happens after he finds out? Will he leave, and then what will become of her?
"Oh, okay, I know. I asked too many questions." He scratched his head and immediately stopped asking. Was her question a veiled rejection? "Are you tired? Well, it's so cold, and I dragged you out here. How about I take you home?"
Song Wen led her to where he had parked his car. Ever since that rainy day, he would drive to her house to pick her up every time he asked her out, and then take her home.
Looking at Song Wen in the driver's seat, she knew she had caused him to misunderstand again. In the past, she would have let him continue to misunderstand, thinking she was starting to distance herself again.
But……
“Song Wen, what I just said wasn’t what you thought.” This time, she wanted to explain and lay her cards on the table. “I really didn’t think of you as well as I thought. Five years have changed me so much.”
The car stopped at the traffic light, and it started to drizzle again. Perhaps it will snow soon.
Song Wen gripped the steering wheel tightly, waiting for Fei Yuan to continue, his heart pounding, wondering what she would say.
“Actually…” she mustered her courage and decided to say it, “Actually, I’m not a virgin anymore. I lost my virginity a long time ago.”
Having said that, she turned her back to the window, refusing to look at him again. There was nothing more she could say. As for the rape and the lactation consultant, please allow her to remain hidden as she leaves.
Staring in astonishment at Fei Yuan's profile, Song Wen was only jolted awake when the car behind him pressed down on the lama. He immediately started the car again but remained silent.
Song Wen's silence convinced Fei Yuan that he minded. But it was for the best; she felt relieved to have spoken up. Some things are better ended before they fully begin. But how could she explain to Song Wen that things hadn't worked out when she went back?
"Feiyuan, I have a question for you." The silence in the car was broken as they approached their destination. "Is your previous rejection, and your continued aloofness, all because of this?"
"Yes." She closed her eyes and leaned back in her chair, making no attempt to hide her feelings.
The car slowly came to a stop at the intersection where she always made him stop. Opening her eyes, Fei Yuan immediately prepared to get out, only to find the electronic lock was engaged. She naturally turned to look at Song Wen, only to see him smiling!
"Why didn't you say so sooner?" It was all for this reason! "I don't mind, I don't mind at all!"
Startled, Fei Yuan opened her mouth, unsure what to say; this was completely unexpected. Perhaps things were more open-minded in the city, but shouldn't everyone here mind?
"Silly Fei Yuan, as long as I can be with you, I won't mind. I know that man must have hurt you, and you didn't do it willingly, right?" Otherwise, why would she have kept quiet about it and even rejected him because of it?
This time, the tears in her eyes finally couldn't be held back and slid down her cheeks. She nodded heavily, then shook her head repeatedly, no longer knowing what she wanted to express.
"Fei Yuan, be my girlfriend, with marriage in mind!" He mustered his courage and pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. This time, he wouldn't let go.
"Song Wen..." Can I still refuse?
It seems I can't refuse anymore...

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"Scent of Incense" - Chapter 148: If I Were Not Me

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