Memories for Myself: PART 1

I've been on 69 for a long time, but always just as an observer. I've never actually done anything like threesomes, but my mind has been deeply influenced. In society, we all wear heavy masks, but when I open 69, I'm my true self. Many people on 69 have written many good articles from the bottom of their hearts, not just about sensory stimulation, but more about achieving spiritual liberation through physical release. Some people are there purely for pleasure. In 69, no one is wrong. But in reality, everyone is a pervert without moral boundaries. So, masks are a necessity for us. Today, I'm taking off my mask and revealing my own story. Because I feel that memories are the entirety of our lives, and if I don't write down my story, when I forget it all, I'll have nothing left.

Below is what I've written about my memories.

(This is my true recollection. As the title suggests, I'm writing this for myself. If any reader finds it fake or boring, just consider it the ramblings of a madman. Commenting is easy, typing is hard. I typed all of this out word by word. If you don't like it, please move on and be kind. Thank you.)

PART.0

As a man, I simply enjoy sex, having sex, indulging myself, losing myself in the moment, seeing my female partner's expression of pleasure, and hearing her screams of ecstasy. I started masturbating from a young age. However, my family was very strict, and I always suppressed my sexual urges. Later, I came across the harmful "masturbation is harmful" theory, which added to my psychological burden. I was afraid that excessive masturbation would harm my body, yet I couldn't control myself, and I even had the urge to castrate myself. Sometimes I hated myself for not being able to be a person without desires, or simply becoming a morally depraved sex fiend. It wasn't until I went to university and started researching legitimate information and learning about psychology and physiology that I gradually gained a correct understanding of sex. The psychological burden was finally lifted, and I finally realized that most Chinese people, like me, had gone through that struggling and conflicted youthful period.

PART 1

After starting graduate school, I was no longer satisfied with my girlfriend. My own love of sex was one thing, but more importantly, she was very traditional and not enthusiastic about it. It was like I was craving it, but my wife's cooking wasn't great, so I had to eat out occasionally. However, I knew this wasn't an excuse. Every time I cheated, I would treat her extra well. In fact, she said she was always very happy. I started searching for people nearby on WeChat and met Baozi. Baozi was, of course, a pseudonym; it was just a word that flashed through my mind, probably because of her large breasts. She had just started working and was alone in the city. Baozi was artistic and idealistic, but her rural upbringing and poor family background forced her to be materialistic, creating many contradictions within her. I'm a good listener and a good friend. We had a great conversation, from literature to film, from school to society. Finally, we talked about sex.

We chatted for about three or four months before she agreed to meet. That evening, as we exited the subway, my heart pounded. I tried to appear calm as I greeted her, then we walked hand-in-hand under the orange streetlights. Baozi lacked confidence because of her short stature. But I happen to like shorter girls. When we arrived at Baozi's apartment, she didn't turn on the lights. We sat awkwardly on the sofa, chatting by moonlight. My heart was racing, my mouth was dry, and I could smell my own breath. I smelled hers too. Then, naturally, I slowly embraced her and gently kissed her, just like that. She wasn't a good kisser; she probably wasn't skilled. My kisses were more aggressive. After forcing open her lips, I greedily sucked on her tongue, lips, and juices, each kiss deep and intense. She seemed lost in the moment and began to moan softly. While kissing her, I kept my right hand warm on my stomach. Because of my nervousness and the weather, my hands were cold, and I didn't want them to touch her warm body. Once my hands warmed up, I slowly slipped them under her clothes. Her breasts were large, something she was proud of. As someone who's into breasts, seeing an E-cup filled me with surprise and primal adoration. Baozi's breasts, though large, were firm. Unlike the softness of most women's breasts, Baozi's were particularly elastic. Her nipples were also large, which I liked. I French kissed her while kneading her large breasts through her thin bra. I love foreplay, I love kissing and caressing. Compared to sex, foreplay allows us to experience the tenderness and the sweetness and love melting into each other's hearts. She also slipped her hands under my clothes; her cool little hands made me feel the reality of the moment even more. We continued to kiss and caress each other, embracing and breathing heavily in the moonlight streaming through the window. I reached down and was surprised to find that the warmth of her body had already penetrated her thick jeans. I gently pressed down, and her whole body trembled. She whimpered, "Let's go to bed."

I love girls' beds, I love the scent of the blankets. The moment I slipped into bed and pulled the covers over myself, the blankets pushed out the air, and a girl's unique fragrance wafted over me. Because the lights were off, we both took off our clothes, leaving only our underwear. In the darkness, two nearsighted people taking off their glasses was like having a built-in filter, filtering out the imperfections of the world, filtering out each other's imperfections. Besides foreplay, what I remember most vividly is the moment when our naked bodies first touched and embraced. After the foreplay, Baozi and I felt like we had a bad cold and a fever, our bodies were hot, even our breathing was hot. But the moment I held her on top of me, I felt that her body was cool. I ran my hands through her hair and kissed her passionately. Gone was the initial awkwardness; Baozi responded passionately. Because Baozi had a firm chest, I could clearly feel two large, round mounds pressing against my chest when I was on top of her. Our bodies were both very hot, and when we kissed, it felt like two people who had been thirsty for a long time were desperately sucking water from each other's mouths. I turned the steamed bun's head to one side, then slowly... (The text abruptly shifts to a seemingly unrelated anecdote about a steamed bun and its head, followed by a series of seemingly random characters and symbols.) The text appears to be a jumbled collection of characters and symbols, possibly from different sources. A direct translation isn't meaningful without further context or clarification. 惺艿讲灰谎拇炭ぁH缓蟠幼钔饷嬉蝩σ蝩ν锾颍酱锶樵蔚霓焙蚩焖倩Γ嗤泛妥齑脚级室余龃ヒ幌氯橥罚坏愦炭ず妥急浮L蛲耆樵沃笠幌伦佑昧≌鋈橥罚蒙嗤范プ湃橥返亩ゲ浚薄0拥枇怂频谋ё盼业耐罚教跬鯪盼业难 My lips left her chest, passed over her lower abdomen, and reached the edge of her pubic hair. I don't like overly thick pubic hair; it affects the texture and has a peculiar smell that can't be washed off. I'm sensitive to smells
. Baozi's pubic hair was just the right amount, normal—so normal I'd almost forgotten it. Slowly, I pulled down her panties; Baozi's little butterfly-shaped pubic hair is something I'll never forget. Yes, Baozi is the legendary Butterfly B. Her BB isn't big, but her labia are very long, truly like a butterfly. I immediately took both wings into my mouth, sucking hard and licking every inch of her labia with my tongue. Baozi's labia are really long, and it felt strange in my mouth. I used the two butterfly wings to hold her opening, thrusting my tongue in and out. My tongue isn't particularly long, so this was quite tiring, and after a while I switched to her clitoris. Unfortunately, Baozi isn't a clitoral type. She still prefers vaginal stimulation. Then, quite naturally, I aimed my penis at her opening, slowly rubbing it, gently inserting it a little bit, and then withdrawing it. The head of my penis was already covered in her semen; I knew she was already aroused.

I love the feeling of going in without a condom, skin to skin, and being penetrated directly. That satisfaction is irreplaceable. We agreed not to use a condom at first, and to use one when we changed positions. Baozi's vagina is small, and her opening is small too. Because we hadn't had sex for six months, it was very tight inside, so tight it hurt a little. I usually look at my partner during the first penetration, then slowly insert myself. I gently say to Baozi, "Darling, I'm inside, we're making love, I love you." Then I kiss her, and then, with a thrust, I penetrate all the way in. I push in with all my might, without pulling out or withdrawing, just enjoying the feeling of our bodies melting together, the heat and envelopment of her vagina. She opened her mouth, closed her eyes, tilted her head back, enjoying the pleasure of her vagina being filled and swollen. I placed her hands on her head, then lowered my head to kiss her breasts. The stimulation from penetration made her breasts even tighter. Baozi's breasts are my favorite—big, round, and firm. I kissed her as I slowly pulled out, then thrust in with all my might when only half of my glans remained at the entrance. Baozi's vagina was short, and my penis was rather long, so when I went all the way in, I didn't feel that complete sensation of the base of my penis being enveloped by her vagina—that was arguably her only regret. Other girls usually experience cervical pleasure when being penetrated, but Baozi was strange; her clitoris and cervix weren't sensitive, only her vagina was, making it very difficult for her to reach orgasm, and she had never experienced one. But, as she put it, as long as it felt good, that was enough; not having an orgasm was her fate. I started with nine shallow thrusts followed by one deep one, and Baozi was exhausted. Then she pushed me down and mounted me. She liked being on top, liked taking the initiative. I reached out and kneaded Baozi's large, bouncing breasts, and said to her, "Darling, I was fucking you just now, now you're fucking me, fuck me hard, fuck my pussy, come on, fuck me to death." Baozi responded, "Yes, I'm fucking you, fucking your pussy, fucking you to death." Baozi's bed creaked and groaned, not because of poor quality, but because Baozi was thrusting too hard. Baozi's ex-boyfriend, according to her, was a bit short, and he'd ejaculate quickly if she was on top. Making love with me was to let her enjoy herself. I don't know how much time passed, but Baozi ran out of energy and I started to tormenting her. Baozi's second favorite position was doggy style, which I also liked, except I couldn't appreciate her large breasts anymore. She knelt by the bed, and I, wearing a condom, stood on the floor, supporting her waist and buttocks as I thrust, saving energy. I could control the angle of her vagina, so this position caused less friction on my penis. When I got tired of thrusting, I pulled out, squatted down, and took her vulva into my mouth, sucking on her clitoris. Her vulva rubbed against my nose and face. I licked it for a while, then continued thrusting. This repeated many times. The room was filled with a lewd smell. Sweat streamed down my forehead, sometimes getting into my eyes from the movement, stinging slightly. My back was covered in sweat. Baozi was like a girl who had just taken a shower but hadn't dried herself properly.

She couldn't take it anymore and begged me to cum quickly. I said, "You slut, beg me." Baozi, in a daze of passion, started spouting those dirty words I'd taught her on WeChat, shouting loudly, "I'm your slut, husband, you've fucked my cunt raw, please cum inside me, my cunt can't take it anymore!" When the emotions are right, that's when sex is most pleasurable. I flipped her over, straddled her, and, holding her breasts, began to thrust wildly. Baozi's body was rather stiff; her legs couldn't lift as easily as other girls', so I never quite penetrated her properly. So I pulled over a pillow and placed it under her buttocks. From then on, a pillow became an essential item for Baozi and me during sex. With the pillow's help, the discomfort of rapid thrusts disappeared, and I, holding her large breasts, began to thrust hard. During thrusts, I was quite "violent," each thrust particularly forceful. Because I knew that at this moment, there was no need for tenderness, because a woman's body and mind needed a man to thrust into every inch of her vagina with all his might. The room was filled with her cries, my cries, the creaking of the bed, and the slapping sounds of our bodies colliding. When I finally ejaculated, I felt like I was going to crush Baozi's nipples. My penis used the last of all my strength to penetrate deep into her vagina, but Baozi's vagina was short, and during ejaculation, I lacked that warm and secure feeling of being completely enveloped by her vagina. But this was also a sex experience I would never forget. After ejaculating, I leaned down and kissed Baozi. We started kissing wildly, as if we wanted to devour each other. The tips of her hair were already wet with sweat, and her bangs were stuck to her forehead. Her arms were tightly wrapped around my back, and I could feel the slippery sweat between her hands and my back. We were both covered in sweat. We kissed for a long time. She let go of me, and I fell to Baozi's side. We lay side by side, the blanket on the floor. The sticky sweat on our bodies and the sheets was incredibly uncomfortable, but we were both too lazy to move. We didn't even bother to take off the condom. I had one hand on her breast, my fingers touching her nipple, but I didn't have the strength to rub it. Baozi had one hand on my penis, but she didn't have the strength to touch it

either. We were panting heavily, trying to calm our breathing and heartbeats. My throat felt a little sore, probably from when I ejaculated. Baozi struggled to get up, took off my condom, and then took my penis in her mouth to clean it. I was incredibly moved, thinking I had to do something, and then, almost unconsciously, I sat up, cupped her face, and kissed her passionately. I used to absolutely not be able to stand the taste of my own semen, but this time, I took the taste as a reward for myself and gratitude to Baozi.

Baozi is now married and has a child. We occasionally chat on WeChat, never saying anything inappropriate, tacitly avoiding any boundaries. Only two or three times, when her husband wasn't home, would we talk about our first time. I miss that crazy time we'll both never forget, talking about our embarrassing, sweaty state, and then exchanging a laughing emoji. Then we say goodnight and go to sleep. She doesn't want to cheat, so I won't say or do anything out of line. Respecting her is my way of loving her.

To be continued.

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Memories for Myself: PART 1

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