How long has it been since you last had sex?

Sexual activity is declining sharply.
Sexual survey data shows that 10% of people aged 27-35 in China have never had sex. This number is increasing year by year… Furthermore, the "Report on the Quality of Sexual Life of Post-80s and Post-90s Generations in China" released by the National Health Organization in March of this year shows that among those born in the 1980s and 1990s, especially those currently working, a staggering 93% have sex less than three times a month; and a whopping 71% have sex less than once a month, meaning they have no sex at all. Human sexuality is often awkward; either you can't find someone to have sex with, or you have a partner but no time for it. Previously, I wrote an article titled "Whether a Man Loves You or Not, His Sex Life Will Tell You," and a reader left a message saying, "I'm 28 this year, married for a year, but I haven't had sex for six months now." Why not? “We’re both exhausted from work every day, sometimes not getting home until the early hours of the morning. He has no energy, and I have even less. The mortgage and car loan payments are suffocating us; we have no energy left for anything else!” “Before marriage, I felt sex wasn’t something to be openly discussed. Now that it’s open, there’s no time or energy.” I think most people are in a similar situation. High life pressures and long working hours lead to a sharp decline in communication and sex between couples. Without communication, there’s a lack of understanding; without sex, there’s a lack of intimacy.
No sexual happiness, no happiness .
“Can you imagine? Two people claiming to be in love lying naked in bed, yet there’s no intimacy at all,” reader Linlin once commented. Married for five years, every sexual encounter for Linlin has been nothing but pain. Just as she starts to feel something, her husband finishes and falls asleep, leaving her with boredom and sadness… She doesn’t know how to communicate with her husband, and gradually she loses interest in sex, mostly just going through the motions to fulfill her wifely duties. Whenever her husband showed interest, she often felt impatient, even somewhat disgusted by his touch. Gradually, she began to reject him. After a while, both of them became unhappy, creating an inexplicable distance between them. They felt a lot of frustration and often argued. Their marriage became dull and tasteless. The two people who once loved each other became like caged animals under the same roof, unhappy and isolated. For them, there was no sexual happiness, let alone joy. The story of
passive vs. active sexlessness
didn't end there. Recently, Linlin discovered her husband's infidelity. Without the expected anger, Linlin calmly went through with the divorce proceedings. When they left the civil affairs bureau, her husband asked her, "Do you hate me?" "No" didn't mean she didn't hate him, but rather that she no longer loved him, so there was no point in talking about hatred. The moment she chose a sexless marriage, she had already stopped loving him. In fact, a sexless marriage boils down to two situations: active and passive sexlessness. For women like Linlin who actively choose a sexless marriage, there are many reasons: loss of love, unsatisfactory sexual experiences, etc. These are all reasons why they choose a sexless life. For them, a sexless marriage is a relief, but it also makes them lose hope in their marriage. Women who are passively asexual are often overwhelmed by life, work, and children, unable to manage everything, or their marriages lack passion or are even in trouble, with their partners actively neglecting them. These passively asexual women often look haggard, have a sallow complexion, suffer from insomnia, night sweats, and even estrogen imbalances. Whether passively or actively asexual, it is extremely damaging to a marriage.
Sexual happiness is essential for overall happiness. It's important
to understand that what distinguishes a marital relationship from any other relationship is sex. Sex is the foundation and core of a marital relationship. With harmonious sex, big problems can become small problems, and small problems can disappear. Of course, a sexless marriage can still be lived in, but it will always feel dull. The mundane realities of daily life can distort the love between two people, even eliminating the most private sexual intimacy. The couple no longer feels like a couple, but more like partners living together. If you truly love someone, you'll want to be closer and closer to them; this is due to the sexual attraction brought about by the hormones of love.
Therefore, without physical intimacy, the absence of love is not far off.
Wang Xiaobo said: "Sex is humanity's most primal natural need, as simple and beautiful as eating and sleeping." Beautiful sex is about mutual appreciation and understanding. For men, sex may just be an orgasm, but for women, it's about communication, observation, appreciation, and tenderness. It's the most intimate form of communication between lovers and one way to prove your love. In China, at least half of wives neither desire nor appreciate their husbands' sexual skills. They especially resent their husbands treating them as some kind of "tool" or "stage." In such cases, couples will only grow increasingly distant, indifferent, and even conflicted. As a woman, you need to master marital skills, because mastering these is equivalent to mastering a man's heart!

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