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His two younger sisters 

This article is based on my own true experiences. I'm currently a university student, and to my shame, I'm studying logistics at an ordinary, third-rate university. I wear glasses and am reasonably good-looking. I just want to write down some of my real experiences. I have two younger sisters. My cousin is 19 this year, three years younger than me. In June, she experienced a major turning point in her life, taking the Shanghai college entrance exam and ending up in a second-tier university, which was quite frustrating. She has a lot of acne on her forehead, but her face is fairly standard for a beautiful woman, except for her rather large nose. My other cousin is 21 this year, seven months younger than me. She's studying at a junior college, majoring in secretarial studies, and will be graduating soon. She has a very good figure, though a bit plump. Without makeup, her face is only average, but with makeup, any man would be attracted to her. Since childhood, the three of us siblings have had an excellent relationship. Sometimes they would come to visit me, and sometimes I would visit them. Because my cousin lives with my grandmother, the three of us grew up together. I remember it was when I was in the first year of junior high school. The three of us were playing hide-and-seek at my aunt's house. My cousin was looking for someone, and I hid in the closet. As soon as I hid, I noticed something behind me—a bunch of videotapes. I randomly picked one up and watched it in the dim light. It said it was some kind of comedy, but I'd forgotten the title because it's been so long. I left it there. After playing for a while, everyone got bored. I remembered the videotapes, put them in the VCR, and as soon as I saw them, my penis got hard (you all know what that means). Later, my two younger sisters came in one after the other. They saw me watching and started watching too. They were curious, and I was thinking about women's genitals. Honestly, back then I never thought about my two younger sisters. I just suddenly remembered the girl in my class, Hua, and felt incredibly hot and uncomfortable. At that time, I didn't even know how to masturbate… They glanced at it and left. I spent the whole afternoon watching it, and then I realized my aunt and uncle were coming back, so I immediately put the tape back. For the next few days, I often watched those tapes repeatedly by myself. My two younger sisters found it disgusting and went to play Monopoly. Until one day, my cousin went back to school, and my cousin was so bored that she stayed with me watching those things. (I swear, most of the incestuous acts happened naturally; there was no seduction involved, absolutely nothing like what's written in novels.) Later, my cousin asked why a man's penis sometimes gets bigger and sometimes smaller. I replied: Because women have licked it, and it's stimulated. My cousin said, "It looks like extra flesh. Why would a woman lick that?" I said, "I don't know. Maybe it's because men lick women's private parts." My cousin said, "Ugh, how disgusting! Why would you lick a woman's private parts?" Within six months of this conversation, the controversy surrounding the videotape had subsided because people were tired of watching it and had memorized it. Some time later, one day, I went to my aunt's to see my cousin. When she opened the door, she was deathly pale. I asked her what was wrong, and she said her lower abdomen hurt. Then I noticed blood on her pants, which startled me. I quickly made her take off her pants, and then I saw blood on her underwear too. By then, she had already developed, and her genitals were a bit dark with a few hairs. I leaned close to my cousin's genitals to look, and then pulled her underwear down a bit. I almost vomited blood at that moment, and my penis jumped up. She was sobbing. Although I had thoughts of touching her, I called my aunt. The girl had started her period. Later, my aunt changed her sanitary napkin. The next day, I kept thinking about my cousin's genitals, so I went to see her again and asked her directly if it still hurt. She said it didn't hurt anymore because she had used the sanitary napkin her mother had bought for her. I asked to see what kind of sanitary napkin it was and how to use it. She said what was there to see, that it smelled awful down there, and told me not to look. I said I'd let her see too, and she actually agreed. She even said I should see first, then it would be my turn. My penis shot up high again. I took off my pants, and she immediately touched it with her hand. I said, "Okay, it's your turn." She obediently took it off, revealing a sanitary napkin and some bloodstains on her underwear. Seeing this, I poked my cousin's vaginal opening with my hand, and she blushed immediately. I asked if it hurt, and she shook her head. I imitated what I saw on the videotape and licked it with my tongue; it tasted very fishy. But my curiosity got the better of me, so I kept licking and poking. My cousin's face was incredibly red. I put my penis in her hand and asked her to lick it too. She leaned closer and said it smelled awful. I said I'd go wash it, and I used shower gel to wash my penis. Then, finding the smell gone, she used her mouth to put it on me. We did 69, her licking me and me licking hers. She kept biting me with her teeth, which really hurt, but I didn't mind because the pleasure kept rushing to my head. Suddenly, I felt something about to burst out of my penis, and then I put it on myself and ejaculated a lot of semen. My sister and I were both shocked. We immediately cleaned up the scene and got dressed. A deep sense of remorse overwhelmed me; I felt it was incest, and I realized I was no longer human. But afterwards, whenever desire arose, I still couldn't resist licking my cousin and me, and the regret lessened each time. Because I never penetrated, keeping our boundaries clear, my sister was always in pain. Sometimes, when she got impatient, she wouldn't let me do it anymore. Then one time, I learned to insert it slightly at the vaginal opening, but at first it always slipped out. After trying more, I was able to get in a little. I suddenly realized that a woman's vagina really felt much better than her mouth, but it was me who suffered terribly because I could only penetrate less than halfway. I would stop when she cried out in pain, and then she would absolutely refuse to let me go any further. When I wanted to ejaculate, I would ejaculate on my cousin's stomach or her breasts. Looking back now, I realize how perverted my cousin and I were. We did it right in front of my cousin, and she always called us shameless. At the time, I had absolutely no interest in my cousin; she was only in sixth grade, incredibly young, and even naked, she looked like a child. After that, my relationship with my cousin lasted for almost four years, and I became even more indifferent in front of her. Later, both my cousin and I were in our second year of high school, and my cousin was in her third year of junior high. That year, my cousin went to work on a farm for ten days. For the first three days, I masturbated every single day. On the fourth day, I couldn't stand being without my cousin any longer. I asked her if she could help me masturbate like her older sister. She said she'd wear gloves, but I said no, I'd wear a plastic bag instead, so I could feel it a little. She agreed. Later, she sat on my lap and helped me masturbate with the plastic bag, and I supported myself with my hands behind me while enjoying it. Later, my hands couldn't stay still, and I gently touched my cousin's breasts. She said it was itchy, so I simply turned her over and hugged her while touching her breasts. The girl in her third year of junior high was starting to grow up quite gracefully. She hadn't gotten acne yet, and she was as clean as a lotus emerging from water. I pinched her nipples, and she said it hurt. I knew she wasn't rejecting me. I'd been practicing on my cousin for four years, and I could tell what was wrong by a woman's expression. I pulled down her underwear and treated her the same way I treated my cousin. She was much quieter than my cousin, who always screamed and yelled. She just breathed softly, without showing any of the wantonness that comes with a woman's pleasure. Just like my cousin treated me, my other cousin, like her sister, only allowed penetration to the vulva. When I got back, I told my cousin. She didn't really think much of it, because what happened between the three of us wasn't love, just a mutual satisfaction of physical desires within family. So, pursuing physical intimacy is a completely different concept from romantic relationships. Sometimes I wanted them to have a fake "threesome" with me, but they always refused, saying it would be too chaotic. I didn't think much of it, because when I was having sex with my cousin in front of my other cousin, and vice versa, the other person could concentrate on other things. That year, my cousin studied while her sister and I were having sex, and she still scored 497 on her high school entrance exam. However, it wasn't until the summer after my cousin and I finished our college entrance exams that one afternoon, the three of us went to the gym to play badminton. When we came back, we were all incredibly hot, and the three of us rushed to take a shower. I politely offered, "You two go first," but they, not wanting me to feel uncomfortable, showered together. Suddenly, I got excited. Just as they were halfway through their showers, I suddenly rushed in, followed by two screams. I yelled, "I'm going to rape you!" Hehe, it was truly a scene of passion, but actually, it wasn't anything special. There was just one more person watching, then touching one and kissing the other. That was my only "threesome." The two of them didn't even exchange a word… Until last year, my cousin got a boyfriend and couldn't resist giving him her virginity. But then he dumped her. She came back crying very sadly and was very resistant to me touching her. For more than a month…It's been a month, and I was just trying to get a feel for things with my cousin. I felt like my cousin was really hurt and wouldn't let me touch her again. During that time, I felt like my cousin had dumped me; I was unhappy every day, really, it felt almost like a breakup. Until one day, she took the initiative to come to me. There was a two-month awkwardness period at first, which wasn't easy to break. Later, I kissed her, and seeing that she didn't resist, I used my tongue to tease her. That day, like before, I only went in to her vulva and didn't go any further. But when I went in halfway, my cousin grabbed my buttocks and wouldn't let me back out. To my surprise, I actually put my penis all the way in. You probably can't imagine how I felt at that moment. The feeling of happiness was so strong; I felt like I had really fallen in love with my cousin. However, until more than half a year ago, on my cousin's birthday, we talked a lot that night. We said that our relationship was really abnormal. Before, we always kept things within limits, but now we actually did the whole thing. My cousin, with tears in her eyes, said she'd help me find a girlfriend. I remained silent, saying I hadn't thought about it. My cousin said we'd always have to separate eventually, and ending this relationship sooner would be better for both of us. I casually asked, "Shan, are you in love with me?" My cousin immediately hugged me and cried, and I hugged her and cried too. That night, because we had nowhere to go, we went out and got a hotel, making love like it was the end of the world. The next morning, we knew that we'd have fewer and fewer of those days. I felt terrible every day; we were trapped in a vicious cycle. During sex, we were blissful, never using condoms, deeply feeling each other. Afterwards, waves of regret from our youth would wash over us. Sometimes we'd just hold each other for hours, neither of us saying a word. My cousin and I were both wounded. Later, I hardened my heart and didn't see her for over a month. She didn't call me either. I couldn't bear it anymore, so I called my uncle and asked if my cousin was alright. My uncle said my cousin looked haggard and seemed constantly anxious. My heart clenched, tears streaming down my face, but I calmly hung up the phone. Later, I couldn't bear it any longer and went to her house. She opened the door for me. Strangely, I hadn't made love to her for over a month, but when we met, I didn't want to touch her at all. I just looked at her. She gently stroked my face. I noticed how much thinner she had become, her lips pale. I couldn't resist kissing her. She flinched, but then leaned in, and we embraced and kissed deeply, as if we were swallowing each other whole. Afterward, she pushed me out the door and said, "Brother, I love you. In the next life, I want to be your wife." I felt utterly dejected, as if I had fallen into an ice cave. For the next few months, I was consumed by longing for my cousin, my love, day and night. My cousin knew about our relationship, and all she could do was comfort me physically. Several times, she told me to hold back, to let the physical pleasure overshadow my longing for my cousin, and to forget about my sister. I know what my cousin is thinking, but I really can't do this. Even now, the wound in my heart, as time fades, gradually seeps into my stomach, causing persistent, unnatural spasms. I know my cousin is the love of my life, and also my lifelong wound; I can't wipe it away, I can't erase it. I think writing it down will make me feel a little better, a way to commemorate the first 20 years of my relationship with my cousin…

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