This is not the fate I wanted (687)

Word count: 3052
(687) But now is not the time to think about such strange things. As the person who loves her most, Kana knows her brother's personality very well. The pain he's showing now is probably because he's taken all the blame upon himself, and that's why he's in so much pain. If she hadn't been there to guide him with words, he might have kept these feelings completely suppressed inside, silently bearing the burden alone. Thinking of this, Kana couldn't help but sigh deeply. Her brother is sometimes excessively kind and excessively prone to overthinking. This is why she often suffers from pain. In the past, she might have chosen to respect her brother's decision and silently support him, whatever he chose. However, after his serious illness last week, and after witnessing his unspeakable suffering, she silently resolved never to let him bear such pain again. Whatever burdens he might face, she would shoulder them herself. She no longer wanted to see her beloved brother, whom she loved most deeply, defeated by such suffering. Besides, when she expressed her deepest, most forbidden feelings to her brother, she had already prepared herself to face all the setbacks, difficulties, and misunderstandings of the world with him. Now, when trouble arises, they must help and support each other. Seeing the tears still streaming down his face, and the look of self-reproach on his face, Kana reached out her white fingers and gently wiped away the remaining tears from the corners of his eyes. She continued in a gentle tone, "Brother~ don't be so sad and in pain~ it's not your fault, so you don't need to blame yourself like this." "No, Kana... it's all my fault... if it weren't for me... if it weren't for me not being able to refuse... not being able to persist... even though I already had Shirane, Shirarei, and Maki... I still ended up in this relationship with Ririna... otherwise... this wouldn't have happened... it's all my fault... it's all my fault..." However, Kana's words of comfort didn't have much effect. The current Ketsuno was still in a state of self-reproach. Even though she wiped away his tears with her fingers, he still couldn't help but let them flow again the next moment. "Brother, you're completely wrong. You're taking all the blame and responsibility upon yourself! There's no right or wrong in matters of the heart. Just like Kana likes you, loves you deeply, or Shirane, Shirarei, and Maki love you deeply, can you say that's wrong? And brother, has Lilina regretted her feelings? Didn't she protect you so steadfastly and defend you because she liked you? Do you want to completely deny Lilina's feelings for you?" Kana's tone remained gentle, but she couldn't help but raise her voice slightly, because these were things she needed her brother to understand. "But... I already have girlfriends... I have them... yet I still ended up in this kind of relationship with Lilyna... I..." "Brother, Kana already said it, right? Feelings aren't something one person can control. Like when Shirane and Shirare confessed to you and became your girlfriend, didn't Maki make the same choice? In the end, she bravely expressed her feelings to you. If you had rejected Maki back then, things would have been much worse, and Maki would have lived a painful life ever since, wouldn't she? Brother~" "This is different from... Maki's situation..." "How is it different, brother? Lilyna and Maki are very similar; they both like..." "My brother, and he already had a girlfriend when he fell in love with you and wanted to be with you~ So there's no right or wrong in matters of the heart~" "No... Lilyna's situation is different... Because of me... her mother saw this scene, making her so angry, and because of me, Lilyna argued with her aunt, making their relationship even worse... It's all my fault... Her relationship with her mother was starting to improve, but now because of me... it's become such a terrible situation... I... completely destroyed her family..." Although Kana's words initially made Yukino Kawa accept it, for him now, there was more endless guilt and self-blame. Hearing Yukino Kawa's words, Kana's fingers paused slightly. Now she understood another reason why her brother was so remorseful and in pain. Deep down, perhaps her brother hadn't completely gotten over the shadow of the past. It was precisely because of his past experience of losing his parents that he unexpectedly valued and cared so much about family relationships and harmony. While other cynical people might envy those with harmonious and complete families for this reason, the kind-hearted Yukino felt only genuine joy and blessings upon seeing other families' harmony, without any jealousy. Similarly, for this reason, his actions had caused a rift in Lilyna's family, with the relationship between the mother and daughter rapidly deteriorating, naturally making him deeply resentful and blaming himself. This was precisely what caused him extreme pain. However, Kana also knew that her brother had fallen into a mental trap, or rather, become somewhat stubborn, ignoring right and wrong and taking all the blame upon himself. So even though many thoughts flashed through Kana's mind, she maintained a gentle expression and continued to persuade her, "Brother, you're completely wrong. Don't take on everything so easily. Kana believes that even Lily herself doesn't want to see things like this. Besides, because of her ideals, Lily's relationship with her family was initially strained, but because of your help, brother, tutoring her and improving her grades, it's thanks to what you've done that Lily has been able to ease her tensions with her mother recently." This gradually led the other party to stop opposing Lilyna's ideals. Lilyna's improved grades weren't solely due to her brother's guidance; it was also related to her growing affection for him. Otherwise, if it weren't for her brother, Lilyna would have been extremely resentful, completely ignoring his teachings. How could her grades possibly improve then? "Doesn't this just prove that you, brother, have helped their family?" "I don't have that credit… it's entirely due to Lilyna herself… her good comprehension…" However, Ketsuno's words didn't… Before he could finish speaking, Kana interrupted him, gently pressing her finger to his lips to stop him from saying anything more. In a gentle and sincere tone, she said, "Brother, don't rush to answer or deny anything. Please listen carefully to what Kana has to say. There's a saying, 'The onlooker sees more of the game than the player,' so let Kana convey everything clearly now. Brother, you say you think it's all your fault that caused the rift between Lilyna and her mother. But have you considered Lilyna's own opinion? Will she blame the world?" "What about you, brother?" Kana thought the outcome was obvious without much thought. If Lilyna truly blamed her brother, she wouldn't have confronted their mother so directly, even threatening her own life when she tried to call the police. Wasn't that a testament to how much she valued their relationship, a feeling that surpassed everything else in her life? Did she really still doubt his feelings? Wasn't that a blatant trampling on them? If Lilyna knew her feelings for her brother were being denied and doubted like this, she would be incredibly heartbroken and distressed.
"I..." Kana's words made Yukino Kawa waver, and confusion flashed in his eyes. Seeing this, Kana breathed a sigh of relief. It meant her words were having an effect, preventing him from blaming her and continuing down a dead end. However, her previous words of advice could be seen as deliberately exploiting his weakness—knowing his reluctance to hurt girls—to drastically shake his initial resolve. Therefore, Kana continued, gently saying to help Yukino Kawa escape his current pain, "Brother, so now, please believe in Kana, believe in Lilina, and don't continue to suffer like this. And Kana can assure you, things aren't as bad as they seem. If we try, we can still slowly make amends for our past mistakes."

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This is not the fate I wanted (687)

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