I Became the Matchmaker Between My Father and Wife - Chapter 195

Another month later...
My father's funeral arrangements are complete, and the mourning period is over. I brought Xiaoying, Haohao, Duoduo, and my mother, Aunt Zhang, to Beijing. This was the trip I had planned with Saoga, though it had been delayed for over five years. During those five years, we had been looking for an opportunity to visit Beijing, but the first year I lacked the enthusiasm due to my emotional state. Subsequent opportunities were delayed because of having children and the birth of Duoduo. Now, we finally have the chance. I just want to offer Aunt Zhang some comfort and help the whole family move out of our grief and relax together.
However, of the people who had originally made the appointment, my father was the only one missing. After meeting with Sao Ga, he was also deeply saddened. When my father passed away, Sao Ga flew in from Beijing specifically for this purpose. Officially, as the regional general manager of the power company, he needed to come to arrange matters related to my father's work and salary after his death. Personally, he had to attend his good friend's father's funeral. Actually, he didn't have to come at all. I am extremely grateful for his kindness. Before he left, he sincerely invited me to come to Beijing to relax, which led to this trip to Beijing.
Throughout the journey, I focused on accompanying Aunt Zhang, while Xiaoying stayed by Hao Hao and Duo Duo's side, since Duo Duo was still quite young. After her father's death, Aunt Zhang hadn't recovered from her grief, unable to eat or sleep well. The once plump and charming woman had become much thinner and listless. It was only during her first trip to Beijing that she was able to somewhat forget her sorrow.
This time, we visited the Summer Palace and saw many historical sites and exhibits. This once magnificent imperial garden has now become a place for modern tourists to visit. No matter how opulent it was, or how high the emperors once reigned, it is all history now. Those emperors have long since turned to dust and disappeared from this world forever, leaving only memories and historical topics for children to learn and study.
Like my father, he and Xiaoying gave me so many unforgettable memories, some painful, some exciting. And now? He's long gone from this world, turned into a small pile of ashes. Slowly, the ashes decomposed into nature, leaving me only with memories. At first, I had a little resentment towards my father, but after he fell ill in his late stages, all I saw was pity and heartache. After his death, all I felt was regret and sorrow for him. You could say that although I wasn't the culprit, I was the catalyst for the whole thing.
The passing of my mother, and now my father, has deeply affected me, especially now that I'm at the Summer Palace, a place steeped in history. Before, I was utterly indifferent and irresponsible when it came to life and my own health. I cared for others, but not myself; I would tell my family, "It's getting cold, remember to wear more clothes, remember to take good care of yourself." Yet I myself didn't know how to take care of myself. I forgot to add clothes when it got cold, forgot to bring an umbrella when it rained, never ate breakfast, refused to see a doctor when I was sick, and even when I did, I forgot to take my medicine on time… My family would say, "Just take care of yourself. Don't worry us." I would always just smile and say, "I'm fine."
I always thought I was young, full of youthful vigor and energy, feeling that even the biggest problems could be overcome. Wasn't that the courage I had when I brought my father and Xiaoying together? Now, however, I've paid an unbearable price, one I have no choice but to bear. As the years rush by, swiftly passing through life's highs and lows, tasting its joys and sorrows, laughter and tears; when I stand before the mirror and see a few gray strands in my once-black hair, I suddenly realize I'm no longer young. The cycle of life, the signs of age, tell me I'm slowly growing old.
If my fate is destined to be one of withering and decay, if all my brilliance is destined to be fleeting like fireworks, then I pray that it all ends as soon as possible, that I don't have to live in such pain, and that I can wait patiently for the next cycle of life in my suffering. Youth is wonderful; youth brings victory! Alas, I am no longer young. No matter how much resentment I harbor, I am powerless to sculpt time, the signs of life, or the cycle of fate. Everything can only be changed by time. This is an immutable law of nature. Faced with life, I can only sigh: It's truly wonderful to be alive!
"Honey, what are you thinking about? You seem so engrossed." Just as I was reminiscing and marveling at the fragility and beauty of life, I was interrupted by an increasingly mature voice beside me.
I turned my head and saw Xiaoying standing beside me, holding a child's hand in each hand, smiling at me. Xiaoying had lost a lot of weight recently; after all, she was partly responsible for her father's tragic fate, and she knew it herself. Countless times, I saw her secretly shedding silent tears, her eyes filled with endless regret and guilt. Since her father's death, she had been chanting Buddhist prayers more and more frequently, for longer periods each time. But she had become increasingly kind to me. No matter how much pain she was in, she would always face me with a smile, showing me care and concern, trying her best to help me through my grief. I knew, in truth, that her sorrow was no less than mine.
Thinking back to that night, when she discovered halfway through that the man beneath her wasn't me, but her father, she was able to resist the temptation of lust and leave him halfway. This shows her determination to sever ties with him. If she hadn't succumbed that night, I wouldn't have worried about anything. I never imagined that fate would sever things so completely, taking my father's life. God, are you helping me?
"It's nothing, just a lot of feelings and insights..."
When it was time to eat, we found a fast food restaurant. We originally wanted to have stir-fries, but Aunt Zhang was taking care of the two children, and kids, you know, prefer fast food, like pizza and hamburgers. At the table, the three of us adults only ate a few bites and then stopped. In the month since my father passed away, everyone's appetite has decreased. Only the two children ate heartily, especially Duoduo. She's still young and doesn't fully understand the meaning of death. We just told her that Grandpa had gone on a long trip and wouldn't be back for a very long time. After all, my father was very good to Duoduo when he was alive; that's how it is in Northeast China—the youngest is often the most pampered.
Dodo has gained a lot of weight and is currently eating voraciously. She finished a large hamburger and is now sitting in a chair, holding a cup with both hands, her cheeks puffed out as she gulps down juice through a straw. Xiaoying and Aunt Zhang are taking care of Dodo, as she's only four years old. Looking at Xiaoying and Aunt Zhang, they are unaware of Dodo's true identity; they would never imagine that this child is her father's offspring, his late-in-life child. Originally, my father and mother only had me as their only son, but now they have a daughter.
Watching Duoduo eat and drink carefree and playfully adorable, I was filled with mixed emotions, and a deep sense of reluctance. All the blame lay with us adults; Duoduo was just a child. If I had confronted them then, the biggest victim wouldn't have been me, but this four-year-old Duoduo. No matter how terrible the mistake, the child was innocent. If I had laid everything bare, revealed Duoduo's true identity, the family might have fallen apart, but it could have been rebuilt, and life could have continued. But what about Duoduo? She became the product of incest between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. How would others view her when she grew up? She would suffer criticism and disdain for the rest of her life, even being gossiped about behind her back. In short, one wrong move, and Duoduo's entire life would be ruined.
Now that my father and mother have passed away, I've lost both parents. My only remaining blood relatives are Duoduo and Haohao. Aunt Zhang, Xiaoying, and my parents-in-law are all very close to me, but we're not related by blood. Duoduo isn't my daughter, but she is my sister, my closest blood relative. I initially thought that knowing Duoduo's true identity would create distance between us, but in reality, every time I see her chubby, adorable, and innocent face, I can't suppress the love in my heart. She's so innocent; I simply can't bring myself to hurt her. It's because of Duoduo, and my father's passing, that I've temporarily abandoned the idea of revealing everything.
Now that my father has passed away, everything has vanished, and the past will never happen again. What's the point of pursuing it now? In the end, it will only lead to separation from family.
We had all finished eating, except for Duoduo. Seeing how happily she ate, we couldn't bear to stop her; she ate more than any of us adults. Looking at Duoduo, I thought back to my journey as a matchmaker for my father and Xiaoying: their first touch, their first leg-to-leg sex, their first oral sex, their first intercourse, their first kiss, their first exploration of different positions, their first time making love over the phone, the first time I heard their sounds of lovemaking, the first time I witnessed it with my own eyes…
The two of them made love, I saw them having sex in the wild for the first time, I saw them making love in wedding dresses for the first time, and it all ended now, and then I unexpectedly got pregnant with Duoduo. I realized that the role of "matchmaker" I had assigned myself was incredibly fitting. Although my father is no longer here, before he died, he and Xiaoying had almost everything a married couple should do: sex, making love, having a child, a wedding—oh, the only thing missing was a legally binding marriage certificate. You could say that in the end, I, the "matchmaker," truly was a matchmaker, but I paid the price myself. Cause and effect, retribution is inevitable—I finally believe in the Buddhist concept of karma. With so many followers, Buddhism must have some truth to it.
After the trip, I returned home and resumed my demanding work. My daughter, Xiaoying, also started working. Due to my father's passing, I brought Aunt Zhang to live with me. From then on, Aunt Zhang helped me take care of the children, do laundry, and cook until she grew old. Life slowly returned to normal, and every day was filled with laughter and joy, allowing me to gradually forget the past. Although I didn't completely forget, the memories began to fade.
That afternoon, I didn't go to work. After returning home, I took something from my briefcase that had been in the company safe for a long time—the paternity test report. I hadn't made it public, nor had I destroyed it. The report for Duoduo and her father was visibly damaged and yellowed, not because I had deliberately damaged it, but because I had opened and closed it countless times at the company. I glanced at the results on the report again, then turned to look at the sunset outside the window. Aunt Zhang had already gone to pick up Duoduo from kindergarten. I watched from the entrance of the community as Aunt Zhang held Duoduo's hand in one hand and carried a shopping basket in the other.
Turning my gaze away from the window, I took out a lighter and set several paternity reports ablaze. All the secrets began to slowly vanish as the reports burned, finally turning to ashes and falling into the fire-resistant trash can. When all the reports were completely burned to ashes, my heart suddenly felt a great sense of relief. I felt as if all the pressure had been released, and I slumped into my computer chair, savoring this long-lost sense of relaxation.
"Ah... Daddy, how dare you play with fire! The teacher said playing with fire is wrong. I'm going to tell Mommy so she can spank you..." Hearing that childish voice, I instantly jumped up from my chair. I turned around and saw Duoduo standing in the doorway, one hand covering her little nose, the other on her hip, her little face puffed up in anger. Oh no, I forgot to open the window for ventilation; the room smells strongly of burning paper. Looking at Duoduo's sulky face, I couldn't help but smile wryly...

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I Became the Matchmaker Between My Father and Wife - Chapter 195

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