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My sister's lover (1) 

My older sister is five years older than me. When I was in college, she was already working for a foreign company and lived alone in a small apartment on Roosevelt Road in Taipei. She didn't get married until I graduated.

Since I had just been admitted to a graduate program at a university in Taipei, to save money and be closer to my family, and because the apartment was conveniently located near the school, my family asked me to move in with my sister.

People say "the eldest brother is like a father, the eldest sister is like a mother," and from a young age, my sister has always been incredibly protective of me. Whenever I was short of money and couldn't ask my parents, I could always get money from my sister. She meticulously took care of my clothing and accessories, which were a major concern during my adolescence. Even with all the difficulties I faced in relationships, she would offer advice based on her own experience.

While she was working away from home, she never forgot about me. Every Sunday, she would come home to talk to our parents, take me to a movie or a restaurant, and ask about my studies and relationships.

I admire my sister's shrewdness, her seemingly omnipotent nature, and especially the vibrant energy emanating from her beautiful figure.

She always wore a well-fitting suit and sleek high heels, walking hand-in-hand with me down the street, her silvery laughter recounting the various facets of life in the workplace: who used connections to get promoted to manager, who made unwanted advances towards her, and who always made lewd jokes.

Although those stories were far removed from my own life, I always listened with fascination.

Ever since my first relationship ended in high school, I hadn't had a girlfriend. For most people, university should be a time of flourishing romance, but I failed miserably, not even finding a woman to hold hands with. Successfully getting into graduate school was a bonus, a "loss on one front, gain on another."

It wasn't that I was unattractive or lacked the skills to pursue women; ultimately, it was simply because I didn't want to. I couldn't find a woman better than my sister, and I couldn't help but compare the women around me to her, comparing their eloquence and sophistication. I compared their unique tastes in colors, clothing, even utensils and paintings, and also the warmth they gave me when they smiled.


My first relationship ended similarly, simply because I wore a pale yellow turtleneck sweater my sister bought me, and she criticized me, saying, "So effeminate! Like a girl!" She said that, and I never asked her out again.

Criticism was acceptable, but criticizing my sister was absolutely unacceptable, especially everything she had done for me. I always thought that it was better to go out with my sister than with her. It wasn't until

I went to university and truly understood love that I realized I had fallen in love with my sister.

Falling in love with one's own sister is unacceptable to society, a very taboo love. So I could only suppress my feelings, only finding solace in casual conversations over a few phone calls a week.

And I couldn't let my sister see through my thoughts, so I avoided mentioning my love life. Even if my sister would ask me a few questions out of concern, I would always give vague answers or make up a woman out of thin air to deal with her questions.

(2)

Being able to move to Taipei to live with my sister made me excited for half a month. Although I was about to face the heavy coursework of graduate school, the thought of being able to be with my sister day and night and share her life was overwhelming.

On the first day I moved into the apartment, my sister had already decorated my room. There was a warm quilt, a large bookcase covering half of the wall, a computer, a wooden desk, and brightly colored imitation oil paintings on the wall. She had put a lot of thought into it. There were even a few wool coats in the wardrobe.

My sister said, "It's getting cold in Taipei, so I bought everything for you first."

I felt a little jealous when I saw my sister standing with her boyfriend.

My sister's boyfriend, A-Jie, said, "Xiao-Xin has never been this good to me. Knowing you were moving in, I became your laborer. A week ago, I finally managed to move all this wooden furniture in, and these past few days, she even wanted me to go with her to buy a coat. Heaven knows how difficult it is to buy winter clothes in the fall; we went to so many places!"

"And she's never even bought me a tie," he complained.

The weather was just starting to get a bit chilly, so buying winter clothes was indeed a bit early. Thinking of my sister's doting on me, my jealousy immediately vanished.

I tidied up my luggage a bit and then went out to eat with A-Jie and my sister. Perhaps because we hadn't seen each other for a while, my sister had a lot to talk about. She asked me about my exam results, my new school, and I asked her how she and A-Jie met and if her work was going well. My sister held my arm the whole way, making it seem like we were the couple.

After dinner, A-Jie drove us back and left first. I went into my room and continued my unfinished work, putting away all the clothes and books from my luggage.

In the small drawer of the wardrobe, I found that my sister had thoughtfully bought several sets of underwear and socks, all neatly folded together.

I examined them one by one; they were all the close-fitting briefs I usually wore. The fabric wasn't thick, but it tightly covered my masculine features, and the colors were mostly neutral tones that I preferred. My sister had already shaped my unique likes and dislikes.

A warm feeling flowed through my heart, tinged with intense affection.

Sister! My dearest sister, you haven't neglected even the most private parts of a man, just like my heart for you, never missing your every move.

I called out to my sister in the next room, "Thank you, sister!" My sister didn't respond; I didn't know if she hadn't heard me or didn't know what I was thanking her for.

That day, I tidied up the room, sweating profusely, and then went into the bathroom to wash away the stench. I chose a black tank top and gray underwear that my sister had bought for me and changed into them. All night long, I seemed to feel my sister's warm body embracing me.

(3)

For the first few days, my sister went to work as usual, while I took advantage of the break before the start of the semester to visit some classmates who were studying or working in Taipei and reconnect with them.

Every day when I got home, my sister had already prepared a sumptuous meal for me. She had already learned to cook well in high school, and in this day and age, where women are generally neglecting housework, my sister's cooking skills are truly rare.

Before I got off work, my sister would ask me if I was going home. If not, she would eat something quick outside, but I liked the time I spent with my sister and would usually force myself to be home before six o'clock.


"Whoever marries my sister must be blessed in their past life. She can make money and cooks so well. You can't find a woman like that even with a lantern." I would always praise the delicious food my sister cooked.

"Really? Once I get married, no one will cook for you anymore!"

"That's right! If I could find another sister... no! A woman with the looks and virtues of a sister, I would definitely marry her." "

Is your sister really that good?"

"Yes! Your sister's goodness is beyond description, and words can't do it justice!"

"Then your sister will cook for you for the rest of her life. After we get married, we'll live together... oh... no! We'll live next door to each other. Whenever you're hungry, I'll bring your whole family over to eat your sister's cooking, okay?"

"Okay! I'm just afraid I won't be able to find a woman as good as my sister to marry, and I'll be a bachelor for life. Then I'll shamelessly stay at your house!"

Actually, what I really wanted to say was that rather than living next door to each other, it would be better if we just lived together like this. I could eat delicious food and see the woman I love, day after day, year after year. And could I say that?

"What do you think of Ah-Jie?" I asked my sister.

"It's nothing special, just ordinary. A girl living alone in a big city can't do without a man to help her. He can help her fix her car when it breaks down, help her carry appliances when she buys them, change light bulbs, and fix water pipes. That's why I had to find someone."

"I think Ah Jie loves you very much! He listens to you and obeys you."

"Hmm! You know it again. He is indeed a good person, but I lack a certain feeling for him, I lack the passion of love. I can go a whole week without thinking about him until he appears at the door of my company. Is that love? I know it isn't, so I have no intention of marrying him."

"But you're almost thirty, and you'll have to get married sooner or later, won't you?"

My sister was silent for a while, and after a long time, she asked quietly, "Are you in such a hurry to marry me off? Can't you help me change light bulbs or fix water pipes? Do you have to find someone else?"

"I can... but..." My heart was pounding, and I had many things I couldn't say.

(4)

One day I came home late, and as soon as I entered the door, I saw my sister squatting in the bathroom washing clothes with her hair tied up.

Her fair neck was white and flawless, with fine beads of sweat. I secretly kissed her fair neck from behind, which startled her.

My sister playfully scolded, "Why are you sneaking around like a thief? Didn't we agree you'd be back at ten?"

"I was worried it would be dangerous for you to be home alone, so I slipped away without even having a drink!" It was a university reunion that day. I told my sister it would probably end around ten, but after the meal, everyone was clamoring to go to a hotel. I wasn't interested, so I drove back to my place.

"Why are you hand-washing? Don't we have a washing machine?"

"Some pure cotton fabrics are less likely to deform if hand-washed, and washing machines don't clean them properly, so they're uncomfortable to wear!" my sister replied, her small hands still rubbing.

I saw that among the soaking clothes were several of my shirts and trousers, including my underwear stained with yellow ink, mixed together with my sister's small, lace-trimmed panties.

I stammered, "Sister! Aren't my clothes in the laundry tub in my room? I was planning to wash them myself."

"I washed all the dirty clothes when I was tidying up your room. Who knows when you'd wash them? You're so lazy!"

"But...but those are men's underwear..." I saw that the underwear my sister was rubbing was also mine. There were yellowish stains on the crotch area, the fluid from my own genitals. I couldn't help but blush and protest.

"What? Are you afraid I'll touch your underwear? I don't mind it being dirty..." A blush also crossed my sister's pretty face, but she didn't stop.

"I'm...I'm sorry! Otherwise, I'll help too." I grabbed a stool and sat down next to my sister, casually picking up one of her panties and rubbing it like she was doing.

It was a pair of pinkish-white silk panties, semi-transparent at the back, with many roses embroidered on the crotch, shimmering with a pink hue. The fabric was quite delicate. I spread them out and rubbed the faint stains inside. Thinking that these were marks left by my sister's private parts, my crotch involuntarily swelled.

My sister blushed deeply, and she said shyly, "No! That...that's dirty..."

"I don't mind being dirty! On the contrary, I love washing it!" I replied, echoing my sister's words. She scolded me, not knowing what to do. The two of us, brother and sister, finished washing all the clothes with flushed faces.

During the process, her shy face was so beautiful that I almost forgot she was my sister. I wanted to pull her into my arms, press my skin against hers, and gently touch her delicate body with my burning penis. My erect penis expressed my lust for her, but I wondered if she was as hot as I was inside her panties.

(5)

Since most of my time in the second year of graduate school is spent on writing my thesis, the workload in the first year is quite heavy, far exceeding that of my undergraduate years. I had only just become familiar with the environment and facilities of the new school when the exams and reports that followed quickly overwhelmed me.

Near the end of the year, I had a subject report on market consumer behavior that I had to submit, which included actual data from a market survey. I estimated that I would need at least one hundred valid questionnaires. During a break, I prepared the questionnaire and planned to conduct it randomly on the streets of Taipei on a day off.

To lighten the workload that day, I asked my sister to take five of the questionnaires to her office to ask her colleagues for help. My sister asked when the submission deadline was and readily agreed.

Since the questionnaires were due in class the following Thursday, I calculated that as long as I could get the questionnaires by Sunday, plus four days of analysis, organization, typing, and formatting, it wouldn't be difficult to complete the task on time.

If my sister could help with half the work, we could probably finish the questionnaire in less than half a day, leaving us with extra time to watch a movie or go for a walk. My sister loves me, she'd definitely agree.

With this plan in mind, I continued to focus on my studies, making the most of every minute at school to get home early and spend more time with my sister. I wanted to be able to spend time with her easily and comfortably at home.

I remember it was Thursday night. I didn't leave the lab until after 8 pm. It was drizzling, and the air was damp and chilly. For convenience, I didn't wear a raincoat and rode my motorcycle along Roosevelt Road. The raindrops created halos in front of my glasses, reducing visibility, so I didn't dare ride fast and only dared to stay in the motorcycle lane.

The temperature wasn't low, but the dampness brought a chill, especially with the biting night wind. I pulled my neck into my turtleneck sweater, thinking of my sister at home, and a warm feeling welled up inside me.

My sister must have eaten out before coming home, right? She would definitely take a shower first, then change into a silk two-piece nightgown, and watch TV with her bare feet tucked in. She would be nonchalant, sipping fruit tea while keeping track of the time, perhaps her half-wet hair still carrying a strong musky scent.


I laughed as I rode, because I remembered the scene of washing her underwear that day. My sister's underwear was so smooth and cute. If she wore it, it would be incredibly alluring, captivating everyone's attention. And her shyness back then, was it just sibling embarrassment? What I held in my hands was fabric that was in contact with her private parts 24/7. Didn't she feel it carried an ambiguous hint of male-female desire?

The red light came on! I stopped at the intersection in the bustling mansion area. It was a little past eight o'clock, and there were many people and cars. Cars were parked on the road, while people hid under the arcades.

Colorful umbrellas formed a sea of flowers, almost drowning out the crowded people. After the green light came on, I moved forward with the traffic, and vaguely, I thought I saw my sister in the crowd.

I peered closer to the damp arcade from the roadside. Was that woman with long, black hair, a blue woolen coat, and tight black trousers my sister? Yes! It was my sister! That round, pert, narrow bottom must be her. What was she doing on the street on such a damp and cold night?

I parked my car by the roadside and watched her from a distance. She was holding a stack of white papers, approaching passersby one by one. Most people shook her off, ignoring her. A few stopped, whispered a few words, and then left, but she persisted, asking each person one by one.

I took a few steps forward and saw that my sister's hair was wet, her bangs were wind-up, and her light blue sweater had several patches of sea blue stains. Suddenly, my nose stung with tears, and I shouted to my sister, "Sister!"

My sister heard me and waved at me while continuing to talk to the passersby. I went up to her and asked, "Sister! What are you doing?" She gave the passersby an apologetic look and replied, "Didn't you see? I'm helping you with a questionnaire!" The white paper in her hand was covered with lines of fine print—it was the questionnaire I had designed!

"You...you...on such a cold night, instead of staying at home, you're out on the street handing out questionnaires. How can I bear this..." I felt both heartache and anger. I snatched the questionnaire from her hand and pulled her hand, trying to leave.

"I was thinking that since I'm free tonight, I might as well help you finish this first..." she murmured, being pulled along by me. Before she could finish, I interrupted her loudly: "You don't know how much it hurts me to see you like this. From now on, I'll handle my own affairs; you don't need to worry about me!"

"Oh...are you angry? I was thinking that if I finish this first, you can go out with me on Saturday and Sunday!" My sister, like a child who had done something wrong, obediently followed me.

Hearing her say this, I couldn't help but burst into tears. Sister! Why are you so good to me? Why do you let me indulge in your tenderness? Aren't you afraid I'll become addicted and be doomed? Or is your love for me as deep as my love for you? I wanted to scream, to hug my sister tightly, and tell her not to spoil me with such doting affection, because it would make me misunderstand!

I wandered around for a long time, my thoughts racing, when my sister suddenly asked me, "Brother! Where are you going, wandering around like this?" I looked around and was stunned. "Yeah! Where am I going?" My sister chuckled and took my hand, leading me back. "Silly boy! The car is over here!"

Although the rain was getting heavier, I didn't feel cold at all with my sister by my side. After a few steps, my sister snuggled into my arms and whispered, "Don't get angry!" I pouted and replied, "Who's angry?"

Of course! If you understood my heart, you would know that I wasn't angry, but heartbroken!

(6)
My sister and I maintained this ambiguous relationship. Although I suspected that my sister also had romantic feelings for me, I couldn't test her, because no matter what the answer was, it would be an unbearable result for me.

I love my sister, and my sister loves me. The two of us should have been a blessed union, but the fact that the object of our affection was siblings made it an unforgivable relationship. Once I misunderstood my sister's feelings, mistaking familial affection for romantic love, I was met with even greater heartbreak.

Rather than be heartbroken or bear the stigma of incest, it was better to let things take their natural course.

Until one day, I was drinking with my professor and senior classmates to celebrate his sixtieth birthday. That night, I drank too much and could barely walk. My sister called me, and I could only mumble for her to come pick me up, because I couldn't even ride a bike. As soon as

she arrived, I collapsed onto the back seat of the car, and with the bumpy ride, I vomited all over the car and myself. I vaguely heard my sister complaining repeatedly, telling me to drink less, saying it made her sad.

When I woke up again, I was back in my room. I felt like I was sleeping in a warm, cloud-like place, with a warm current flowing over me. When I opened my eyes, I saw my sister.

My sister was holding me, her head bowed, wiping my body with a hot towel. She was so focused that she didn't notice I was awake. By the touch of her skin, I knew I was completely naked, my entire bare body pressed against her chest.

I didn't dare open my eyes, afraid she would be embarrassed if she knew I was awake. I felt the hot towel slide over my armpits, over my lower abdomen, even my penis and scrotum. Finally, she gently parted my legs and carefully wiped my buttocks.

Through her silk nightgown, I could feel her rapid breathing, her body burning hot. Her heart was restless, her desire surging. How could her mind and body be free as she caressed the naked body of a mature man?

The thought of being naked before her, while she was gently and carefully wiping me clean, made my mind race. My penis became erect. I felt embarrassed and dared not open my eyes.


My sister probably noticed too; her delicate body trembled. Seeing that I hadn't opened my eyes, she softly called out, "Ah Sheng! Ah Sheng! Are you awake?" Her rapid heartbeat pounded against my arm.

I didn't open my eyes. My sister held her breath for a long time, then suddenly gently grasped my penis and said softly, "You're still so naughty even when you're drunk! You scared me to death! If you woke up, I really wouldn't know what to do." Her warm little hand held my penis firmly, so smooth and slippery. The more comfortable I felt, the harder my penis became. I really wanted to jump up and hug my sister, forgetting all about incest and twisted love.

My sister held my hand for a long time before her breathing gradually calmed down. Suddenly, she sighed, "Oh! Can I tell you I love you? Good heavens! You're my brother, my own brother... I... what should I do?"

I felt my eyes welling up with tears, and my heart warmed. I finally knew that my sister loved me, not just as a brother, but as a woman. A sister could caress every inch of her brother's skin, even his private parts and anus, without a care. That transcended the usual sibling affection; it was a sincere and profound love.

With joy, I fell asleep again. Because I had drunk quite a bit, pretending to be asleep easily turned into real sleep. It was better to be asleep; there were some things I needed to think about carefully, and I couldn't let embarrassment, awkwardness, or impulsiveness hinder my love for my sister.

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