Beautiful Meat Tree

The first ex-girlfriend I reminisce about in "Private Anecdotes" is Yao Yao. I mention her first simply because she
was my first girlfriend, out of respect for that "first." But if we're talking about
the ex-girlfriend who left the deepest impression on me, and with whom I still maintain friendly relations in real life, she doesn't come to mind. It's
the woman I'm going to talk about now, let's call her Xiao Mu.

I have countless memories of Xiao Mu, but this article mainly focuses on my memories related to sex. The most profound impression she
left on can be condensed into three sentences: "I don't want to be a virgin anymore."

"Anus? I'll lick it, isn't that what you call 'poison dragon'?"

"If I ejaculate inside, do I need to take birth control pills immediately, or is it okay to wait until daytime?"

These three sentences span almost ten years.

Xiao Mu, like Yao Yao, was also my junior in school, but she was younger, two years younger than me.

Although it's no longer fashionable now, in some cities with historical background, there are still some old and prominent families.
Xiaomu's mother's family was a prominent clan in our city, tracing their lineage back to a
famous minister of the Song Dynasty. Her father was a high-ranking administrative official, though I won't go into his exact position. So Xiaomu
was a typical "rich, beautiful, and successful" girl. However, when she first entered high school, few knew about her family background. Instead, they all
thought she was a typical oddball—beautiful, with a great figure, but a quirky personality, always keeping to herself,
and not getting along well with her classmates; even the boys didn't want to get close to her.

How we met was complicated and uninteresting, so I'll skip the details. After we met, because
my family background was similar to Xiaomu's, our personalities were somewhat alike, and we clicked easily, and more importantly—which I
realized years later—this oddball actually needed a lot of care from those around her, and at that time,
I was probably the first person to approach her and show concern. So, little by little, I quickly became one of her rare friends
. She would often wander into our classroom after class, completely ignoring the strange looks from the upperclassmen,
to chat with me. Looking back, I realize I had a strange kind of patience for her back then, and perhaps that patience
earned me a special place in her heart for quite some time.

When I went to university, I temporarily lost contact with Xiaomu. We only reconnected by chance in my junior year
. We were both single at the time, so we naturally started dating. But this time it was a long-distance relationship; I
stayed in my hometown studying at a 211 university, while Xiaomu went to a nearby second-tier university.

After we became a couple, I often visited her in her city. Whenever I went, she would stay with me in a hotel.
All her roommates were gone, leaving her still a true virgin. Suddenly discovering that the usually conservative Xiaomu
was willing to spend the night with a man in a hotel caused a frenzy among the girls, who offered countless terrible suggestions.

Actually, the most we did in the hotel was kiss.

Xiaomu was terrified of sex at that time. She had a terrifying memory from elementary school: a pervert had molested
her, ejaculating in her palm and smearing semen on her face and mouth. This memory put
immense pressure on Xiaomu. Until she was with me, she remained fearful and averse to sex.
When she was with her first love in college, she couldn't even bear to hug him because the feeling of her breasts being pressed against a man's chest
terrified her. So they rarely hugged during their relationship (a silent sympathy for her ex-boyfriend).
She was at least willing to kiss, but only occasionally.

I can't remember exactly how I gradually dispelled
Xiaomu's fear of sex over that nearly one year. Slowly, Xiaomu was able to hug me, accept my touch, be naked in front of me,
masturbate me, give me oral sex, and let me ejaculate on her breasts and face, although she still disliked
the smell of semen.

I'm certain that one day Xiaomu will completely overcome this trauma. I maintained remarkable patience, making sure Xiao
Mu didn't develop any new aversion to sex. We were only one step away from taking
that final step, and I felt it would happen soon.

Sure enough, one winter, Xiao Mu suddenly texted me, "I don't want to be a virgin anymore!"

So, that Valentine's Day, with the mission of taking Xiao Mu's virginity, I went to the city where her university was.
That night, we ate Italian food, watched a movie, went shopping, and didn't return to the hotel until almost midnight. Many years
later, Xiao Mu said she never imagined that even though she had actively asked me to take her virginity, I would still
patiently accompany her through the Valentine's Day rituals, just like those young men trying to please their girlfriends and hoping to successfully trick them into bed.

Back at the hotel, we went to bed. Xiao Mu didn't hug her pillow and snuggle under the covers to
talk to me while looking at me, as she usually did. Instead, she lay flat on her back, slightly nervous, her legs slightly apart, her eyes fixed on the ceiling.

I asked, "Do you still want to do it?" Xiao Mu pursed her lips and nodded stubbornly.

We performed oral sex on each other. At that time, Xiaomu was actually somewhat resistant to oral sex. She said that her imagined
sex was a beautiful intertwining, but the thought of a hairy, smelly penis being inserted into her mouth
and licked with her tongue, especially considering that the same penis also served the function of urinating,
made it impossible for her to associate this kind of sex with beauty. However, she always considered my needs, overcame her
discomfort, and never refused when I put my penis in her mouth.

Looking back now, Xiaomu never cared whether I washed my penis before oral sex. Although she would
always mutter a few words about it being dirty and smelly, a few times when I was eager for her to give me oral sex, she never cared
how much I sweated or whether I had just been to the bathroom. She would always frown but swallow my penis without hesitation.

I understand that washing is necessary for a good sexual experience, and most of the time I would prepare.
But sometimes being too particular can ruin the mood. Later, many women, no matter the occasion, insisted that I wash them
inside and out three to five times, practically spraying them with perfume before they would perform oral sex. I always politely declined such women and
kept my distance.

Let's go back to the moment I was about to transform Xiaomu from a girl into a woman. Xiaomu's vagina was quickly
soaked ; she was always like that, her juices always flowing profusely, emitting a faint, musky fragrance.

Xiaomu's cheeks were flushed, as red as if she had a fever. She squeezed her legs together, staring nervously at the painting on the wall. I was slightly rough...
I spread her legs, teasing her clitoris with my fingers. Xiaomu began to writhe her waist and hips. I slowly increased
the pressure, and she began to moan.

I removed my hand, about to make my next move, when I saw Xiaomu's hair falling down and obscuring her
eyes. I reached out to brush her hair back. Xiaomu, however, thought I wanted her to lick my fingers clean, and immediately
took my finger into her mouth. Suddenly, I became aroused, jumping on top of her, spreading her legs wide, and
pressing my penis against her vaginal opening. Xiaomu's breasts were flattened by my chest. She closed her eyes tightly. I gently thrust, and
her brows furrowed.

I sighed silently again.

I whispered in her ear, "Open your eyes." Xiaomu opened her eyes like a baby. I stared at her and asked, "Are you
scared?"

She looked at me for a long time and said yes. I said, "If I move forward a little, it will be different for you. But for me,
nothing changes, nothing is lost. Do you really want that?"

Xiaomu didn't speak.

I rolled off her and lay down beside her. I knew it would be like this. I understand Xiaomu. Regardless
of the reason for her sudden impulse, she didn't truly want it. She was just stubborn, just willful; once she
said it, she'd grit her teeth and persevere. Even if she regretted it, she'd still
stubbornly hold on until the very end. If I didn't stop, although Xiaomu would regret it, she'd most likely let me turn her into a woman
.

I didn't want Xiaomu to have an unpleasant memory of losing her virginity someday.

Xiaomu nestled into my arms, silent for a long time. I stroked her smooth back and dimmed the bedside lamp to its
lowest setting.

Honestly, regardless of what awards I'd won, what achievements I'd made, or how much money I'd earned before or after that—in university, abroad, or after starting work
—I've always felt that what I did that night was the most
difficult and precious thing I'd ever done.

For months after the failed attempt to lose my virginity, it seemed like Xiaomu and I remained stuck on that night. We
both became very calm and rational, giving our relationship a thorough review.
A few , my relationship with Xiaomu ended without

a clear resolution. Even now, neither of us can pinpoint the exact reason. We both vaguely
felt that continuing the relationship wasn't the right choice. It had nothing to do with the nature of our feelings for each other; we just
felt incompatible. Even though we still loved each other and cared for one another, it just didn't feel right.

So we broke up, and it really happened, even though both our parents wanted us
to stay together. When we first started dating, Xiaomu jokingly said we were destined to be together because of our perfect understanding.
Even after we were no longer lovers, this understanding often manifested itself.

Years after our breakup, she said again, "We weren't destined to be together." I know this might not be a joke.
Because I've been trying to correct my nature with reality, while she's been trying to resist reality with her own nature.
Perhaps we were naturally compatible, but we slowly drifted apart.

I tried to influence her with my corrected personality, which is exactly what she dislikes and is least comfortable
with. Although her father said he was grateful that I
was with , and although I was completely oblivious to this difference,
the reality that I was at a 211 university while she was only at a second-tier one actually put pressure on her. Her father said that it was during that time that he noticed his daughter suddenly
becoming serious about her life, suddenly caring about her studies and future, thus creating
a Xiaomu in university who was completely different from the one in high school. I don't think her change was necessarily related to me; people always grow. And regardless of whether I
had a good or bad influence on her, my attempt to regulate her with my own rules was selfish.
We might not have been suitable to be together.

Later, I went abroad, and then she went abroad too, though not to the same country, so we didn't keep in touch. A few years later
, I returned to China, and then she returned as well. This time, we both returned to the cities where we grew up,
five or six years after our breakup. We reconnected in a QQ group, followed each other on Weibo, and slowly started to interact
normally as friends again.

Most of the time, we communicated via text message, MSN, QQ, and Weibo, rarely meeting in person. I
don't think I had started using WeChat yet at that time.

Until then, I had no idea what the future held for Xiaomu and me.

When we first reconnected on QQ, neither of us knew who the other was, but our QQ signatures were exactly the same
: "Like a boat adrift." This amazed one of her friends who later followed me on Weibo
. But honestly, for me, that phrase was just sentimentality; for Xiaomu, it was a reflection of her reality.

Xiaomu was still as eccentric in some ways as she was in high school. A girl from such a family background
insisted on dating a small bar owner. This was unacceptable to her parents. Her

father said to her, "You've earned two master's degrees from a prestigious university. Even if our family isn't materialistic, we're
not so stupid as to say something like, 'You can't marry anyone except a PhD graduate from overseas,' but you shouldn't be dating a
high school graduate who's tried two or three businesses and failed at them all, right?"

One Dragon Boat Festival, Xiaomu brought her boyfriend home, but before she could even have a cup of tea, her father politely asked her to leave.

Xiaomu's response was to move out and live with her boyfriend.

I asked her, "Why did you have to cause such a fuss with your family? What is it about this boyfriend that attracts you?"

She replied, "Freedom." Okay, I don't completely accept that, but at least I understand.

Because we used to be boyfriend and girlfriend, and we occasionally joked around in private—we were the kind of
friends where my penis had even been pressed against her vaginal opening—we chatted quite freely.

Perhaps because there were some experiences and thoughts that were indeed inconvenient to discuss with others, Xiaomu and I chatted countless times, and
little by little, I learned a lot about her sexual achievements after our breakup. For
example, she lost her virginity to a Dutch boyfriend after going abroad; she had a threesome with a man and a woman, the woman being a lesbian, wearing
a dildo and having sex with her boyfriend; Xiaomu wasn't opposed to anal sex at all, but because she suffered from hemorrhoids...
One of her regrets was that she had never tried it. She had hoped to fully explore all
the virgin territory on her body, but the doctor told her that her hemorrhoids were too severe for anal sex… Xiaomu even told me once
, after getting drunk, that she had been kidnapped and raped by strangers abroad for a whole day. Of course, she didn't go into details, and later I
realized she didn't seem to remember telling me about it while drunk.

The previous stories only made me sigh occasionally. But the last one made me admire her even more.
She has truly overcome the trauma of childhood sexual fears. Even with the added trauma of being raped,
she hasn't developed new fears and maintains a healthy and enthusiastic attitude towards sex.

Once, I met her on MSN, and we were talking about the past. I jokingly asked her if she was still
afraid of sexual contact like before. She actually denied ever having been like that, retorting that when had she ever been afraid of
sexual contact? Being her boyfriend was the best thing ever; even lying in bed doing nothing, she could make him feel completely
satisfied.

I said, "After we get into bed, it's so boring for a man to just lie there doing nothing."

Xiao Mu sneered and said, "I'll climb all over him, lick his whole body, for as long as he wants me to lick
, and wherever he wants me to lick, I'll lick. How could he possibly be bored?"

I sent three ellipses and said, "I believe you'll work hard. But I
don't quite ."

Xiao Mu countered, "What's there to doubt?"

I said, "At least one thing is questionable."

She sent three question marks. I countered, "What do you think I have doubts about?"

Xiao Mu replied, "I can't think of anything. His asshole? I lick it, you know, what you call the 'dragon'? Lately, after he
showers every day, I lick it for him for ten minutes or so. How about that? Not difficult, right?"

I was slightly surprised, but then said, "I meant his feet. You lick his feet too? Very few girls are willing
to lick feet."

Xiao Mu didn't react for about half a minute, then laughed twice and said, "I've never actually licked that. It's not that I'm
unwilling, it's just that my boyfriend doesn't seem to have that kind of interest. He doesn't ask for it, so I don't feel obligated to lick it."

Then we chatted idly, seemingly venturing into cocktails. Our conversations are always like this, ranging from all sorts of things
, vague and ambiguous, not specifically about sex, nor deliberately avoiding the topic, and always quite
frank.

When Xiao Mu first said these things, I didn't feel anything unusual. A few days later, I suddenly remembered that
conversation, and then I thought of that nervous little girl from years ago, the little girl who was afraid even when being hugged,
now able to roam over a man's body, intently licking his anus for ten or twenty minutes. I couldn't help but
feel a little sad, lamenting the impermanence of life.

About a year later, I suddenly heard that Xiaomu and her boyfriend had been cheated on by a third party. But I only
heard her mention it once on MSN, it seemed her boyfriend had a physical affair, and I knew nothing else.

For more than a month afterward, Xiaomu rarely appeared in any communication tools, vanished without a trace, her current situation unknown.

One late night, I was rushing to finish a job. By the way, I'm not suited for an office job, nor do I have
the patience for one, so I chose a freelance job, making a living with my skills. When there's work, I might be busy for ten days or half a month, and
when there's no work, I'm very carefree. That day I was busy, working until dawn. The work I was doing required meticulous
skills; once I started, I had to be very careful, and it was very energy-consuming. Around 2 AM, I suddenly received
a text message from Xiao Mu.

"He ejaculated inside. Do I need to take the birth control pill immediately, or is it okay to wait until daytime?"

I was feeling groggy and my thinking was a bit slow. Reading her message, I assumed she and her boyfriend had a fight in bed
and were making up in the middle of the night, so I half-jokingly replied, "Why didn't you have your boyfriend wear a condom? You
're a veteran; don't you know when to take the birth control pill?"

Xiao Mu quickly replied, "Men always wear condoms. I've never been ejaculated inside before, and I've never taken it. It wasn't
with my boyfriend."

I was a little stunned by the last sentence and couldn't think of anything else to say, so I replied, "Is it usually
okay within 72 hours afterward?"

A little while later, Xiao Mu asked again, "If I've been ejaculated inside many times, should I increase the dosage of the pill?"

I was really scratching my head at this question. I only know that emergency contraception can solve the
problem in an emergency, but I don't know how the drug works, so I can't guarantee whether there's
a relationship between the dosage and the amount of ejaculation. However, I've never heard of a woman needing to take more contraception if she's ejaculated a lot at once. So I replied,
"It shouldn't have anything to do with how much was ejaculated, right? Just read the instructions after buying the pills and take them as directed within the prescribed time, and
there shouldn't be any problem. By the way, I'm worried about whether I should increase the dosage. How many times were you ejaculated on? Excessive
indulgence is harmful to your health, kid." At this point, I was still joking.

Xiao Mu said, "I ejaculated once at the bar. Then at the hotel, they called another guy, and the two of them ejaculated
four or five more times in total. Once he ejaculated in my mouth, and the rest inside me."

I finally realized this wasn't a joke and quickly asked, "Are you sure the guy is safe? It's not just about contraception
. Should I buy some pills and bring them to you now?"

She said, "He's definitely safe. There are no strangers, just friends I know. You don't need to come over; we're not finished yet
, still at the hotel. I'm in the bathroom now. I just showered."

While pondering what to say at this moment, I carefully wrote a reply. After typing just over ten words,
Xiao Mu sent a final text: "I'm not saying anything more. They've rested, and I'm about to get fucked again." I was stunned for a few minutes. It's hard to describe my feelings. Hearing this kind of news, it's probably impossible for someone in a million

not to feel anything . 　　But I absolutely understand that I have no right to comment on this matter. Xiao Mu is an adult. And I can be sure she's perfectly sober right now. She made the decision herself, so no one else had a say. 　　I could only stare blankly for a while, then realized I wasn't in the right state to continue working, so I quickly finished and went to bed . 　　About two weeks later, Xiaomu invited me to dinner. We chose a Friday evening and went out for a full-course meal.

A vegetarian meal. Although we've kept in touch for years, we've only met a handful of times.
That's modern city life; you might feel very close to someone, but it could be a long time since you last met face-to-face.
That's how it is with Xiaomu and me. The last time we met was when she had just moved out to live with her boyfriend.

We talked about newly released movies, new laptop models, the latest online talk shows, and we both
praised Xiaomi and scorned iPhones. Towards the end of the meal, I noticed Xiaomu was laughing more than at the beginning.

I knew she needed to vent her frustrations. But the root of her frustration was her cheating boyfriend, and there were
things she couldn't easily discuss with her regular friends. As a
man straddling the roles of lover, senior, and friend, and who usually maintained a proper distance from her, I was probably the most suitable
person to talk to at times like this.

So I never asked her about her boyfriend. I just talked about interesting things, said things that
resonated , and we could discuss them excitedly together. Or I'd tease her and banter with her, offering
opinions that were clearly the opposite of hers, and then let her criticize me mercilessly. Pretending to be a confidant and insisting
on discussing breakups at times like this was pointless. She'd talk about these things if she wanted to, so
it was best to let her chat at her own pace.

Xiao Mu hadn't expected me to take her to a vegetarian meal, and considering the possibility of drinking, she hadn't driven.
So after the meal, I drove her home. She was still temporarily staying in the apartment she used to share with her boyfriend. On the way, I asked her
why didn't move back to her parents' house, so they would feel more at ease.

Xiao Mu answered me with those same two words: "Freedom."

Xiao Mu lived on the 17th floor of a high-rise apartment building. High-rise apartments always give a feeling of insecurity at night
. I insisted on walking her home.

The moment she opened the door, her expression changed visibly. She just waved hurriedly, didn't say a word,
and closed the door. From her actions, I immediately understood that there was probably someone else at her house, most likely her boyfriend returning.

Of course, I wasn't naive enough to think that her boyfriend's return meant they were back together. Xiaomu's expression when she entered
made me uneasy, so I remained cautious and didn't go downstairs, instead staying at the elevator entrance on that floor, browsing
the novels saved on my phone.

Xiaomu's apartment wasn't far from the elevator, and I kept an eye on her unit. After waiting for about twenty minutes without any
movement, I prepared to leave. Just as I entered the elevator and went down about four or five floors, I suddenly received a call from Xiaomu:
"Where are you now? Are you close to my place?"

As soon as my phone rang, I saw it was Xiaomu calling. Before answering, I immediately got off the elevator at the floor I could reach fastest and
walked back down the stairs. I calmly told Xiaomu that I was at the elevator entrance in her building.

Xiao Mu was genuinely surprised to find me still standing in her building's hallway. She stood there stunned for several seconds, only managing to say, "Take
me with you."

When I returned to Xiao Mu's floor, she had just come out of her apartment, carrying a small duffel bag. Her boyfriend
followed behind her, saying a few words, which I didn't quite catch. He had never seen me before and didn't know who I was
. Under his unreadable gaze, I took Xiao Mu's duffel bag and we went into
the elevator together.

Xiao Mu remained silent until we got into the car. I asked her if we were going to her parents' house. Her parents hadn't moved
; I had visited them when we were still dating. I had even taught her how to give me a blowjob in her small bedroom, which she found
very fun and enjoyed, saying it was like sharpening a knife.

Xiao Mu shook her head, not saying where we were going. I had no choice but to start the car and slowly drive along the main road,
waiting for Xiao Mu to speak and give me a destination. It was a little past eight in the evening. Although the streets were still
bustling, traffic was relatively smooth as long as you avoided particularly congested areas.

Xiaomu remained silent for over ten minutes before suddenly bursting into tears. I didn't disturb her, letting her cry.
She cried for six or seven minutes before gradually calming down. Seeing that she was a little better, I asked, "What happened?"

Xiaomu said her boyfriend had come back to collect the last of his luggage. She couldn't help herself and asked
again the question that had been bothering her most: why did he choose that woman?

Her boyfriend had never clearly explained the reason. Xiaomu always felt it might be because that woman
was excellent in bed, making it hard for her boyfriend to let her go. Otherwise, she couldn't think of any other reason.

"Guess why he chose that woman?"

I was also struggling with this question.

Xiaomu had beautiful features and excellent skin. Her height is average, just over 160cm. Her breasts
aren't , but they're quite full relative to her height. What's especially remarkable is their shape;
they're basically two perfectly round hemispheres, the kind of "spherical breasts" I've seen on a handful of times, with excellent elasticity
. Her buttocks are also very perky. Aside from her height, she's the kind of woman with a perfect figure.

Her aura is even more captivating than her body. Some people, when they talk about aura, either describe it as a pretentious, artsy type or a
dignified, aristocratic woman. In my opinion, aura is an attraction formed by a blend of inner and outer qualities.
Whatever the style, as long as it's attractive enough, it's a unique aura. Xiaomu's aura is
a mix of one-third mature woman, one-third fresh and innocent, and one-third rock 'n' roll girl.

Xiaomu can take photos, mix drinks, ride horses, and even program. She's good at badminton and was
the women's 3000-meter champion for three consecutive years in college. She was a true daughter of a wealthy family, but she wasn't spoiled at all. She
lived a very down-to-earth life, so much so that none of her former college classmates could tell from her daily life
what her family background was.

Xiaomu has always been the most unique and attractive woman I know.

With such personal charm, plus her family background, honestly, what kind of angel could possibly
surpass Xiaomu, who is elegant in public, capable in the kitchen, charming in the bedroom, and successful in the workplace, and steal her man away?

Xiaomu smiled bitterly and said, "He told me that the reason he ultimately chose her, not me, was because he felt that the other woman
loved him more and valued him more."

I curled my lip and said that was fucking ridiculous. Could such a load of rubbish be a reason for a breakup?

Xiao Mu said, "He just gave an example, saying that at first he wanted to stay with me, but that woman
knelt down and begged him not to leave her, while I probably would never do that for him. And that woman promised that
she would do things she was reluctant to do before, like anal sex or drinking urine, right away. As for me, he said even
when we were playing pretend, even though he was the master and I was the bitch, he still felt like I was teasing him
, giving him a bone."

I was speechless. But I really understood.

Xiao Mu rubbed his face hard twice, tidied his slightly messy hair at his temples, looking completely bewildered
and helpless. "So I cried, I feel like I'm such a fucking failure."

I had something I needed to say, but I didn't dare to get distracted while driving. After circling around twice,
I finally found a place to park. During this time, Xiao Mu stared blankly out the window, without saying a word.

I stopped the car, silently rehearsing what I wanted to say in my mind. Suddenly, I reached out and cupped Xiaomu's cheeks,
gently turning her face towards me. Looking into her eyes, I said earnestly, "I don't know if I understand correctly
. A pheasant gets a phoenix, of course it's happy, because it's a phoenix, it's got the phoenix!
But even the pheasant knows that if one is always a pheasant and the other a phoenix, it's really hard for them to
be together . When you're passionately in love, anything goes, but for a long, steady relationship,
the gap between the two can't be too big. There are two ways: one is for the pheasant to try to become a phoenix, and the other is to persuade the phoenix to degenerate
into a pheasant, that's a match. But it's too difficult for a pheasant to become a phoenix. So for it,
the best way out is for the phoenix that's already in its hands to willingly degenerate into a pheasant, so it can
savor the pleasure of having the phoenix while living peacefully with the phoenix that has become a pheasant."

Xiaomu let her face be cupped in my hands, listening to what I said, and a smile appeared on her face. I continued,
"But the pheasant doesn't understand that it encountered a phoenix who didn't mind being a pheasant, but also wouldn't allow itself to become
one. It always waited for the phoenix to please it, and then willingly fell into depravity; it had probably been anxious about this for a
long time. Then, it suddenly met another pheasant, who was also somewhat attractive, and more importantly, very considerate.
This other pheasant probably admired and loved the one who could only eat the phoenix, making the pheasant feel that perhaps this was a more
suitable partner. Xiao Mu, you are just a phoenix who doesn't want to fall into pheasant form. If, as he
says, you really lost because you didn't want to fall into pheasant form, I don't know where you failed. If I had to say what you
failed at, it would probably be that you initially chose a pheasant who lacked courage and confidence, and now
you feel like you've failed because you insist on being a proud phoenix—these two things are truly failures."

Xiao Mu moved its face away from my hands, turned its head, stared blankly for a while, let out a long breath, and asked:
"Am I really that good?"

I said what was on my mind. "You're a wonderful woman."

Xiaomu turned her face, and I couldn't quite put my finger on what her expression and eyes meant at that moment. I was just
a little puzzled. Even if what I said had no effect, it shouldn't have made Xiaomu go from being sad to
acting so strangely. She suddenly smiled as if she had let go of everything and said, "Well, I'll tell you something.
Everything that happened the day I texted you about the birth control pills. Everything. You have to listen carefully because I have a question
for you."

I was conflicted. To be honest, I couldn't completely ignore what happened that day; I really wanted to know the cause and
effect. But I didn't really want to hear it, especially since she emphasized that it was everything.

But Xiaomu was simply unstoppable.

Especially since she said she had a question for me. I figured the question she was going to ask at this point must be very important, and
if I had to hear those things to hear the question, I had no other choice.

Xiaomu stared into my eyes as she began to speak, her eyes fixed on mine, forcing me to keep
my gaze fixed as well.

"That noon, my boyfriend officially told me for the first time that he wanted to break up. I was depressed all afternoon
and inexplicably got into two big arguments with my colleagues. I really love him, and I don't want to break up, especially since I
can't understand where I went wrong. He just won't tell me directly. What did I do wrong?
What ? Even if he just told me directly how that other girl is better than me, I would
understand. But how long has he known that girl? He's only slept with her a few times. In such a short time,
what does he see in her? Is she particularly good in bed? I think I'm pretty good in bed too.

I'm so depressed, so very depressed. I felt that if I just went home after work and stayed in the house we used to live in together
, I would definitely die of depression. So, near the end of the workday, I invited a handsome guy who had pursued me in college
to a bar. You've met him before; he played a game of tennis with us and lost badly." "

I nodded, indicating that I did remember that handsome guy. Actually, in my memory, he was quite pitiful.
It was probably the first time I took Xiaomu to her school for registration. This handsome guy texted her casually, asking when she was coming back to
school, and then excitedly ran to the train station to pick her up. I wanted to surprise Xiaomu, but instead, I saw
her walking out of the train station arm in arm with me.

Later, he invited us to play ball, probably wanting to show off and embarrass me in front of Xiaomu. His
skills were quite good, but I was alright too, at least I wasn't completely outmatched by him, it was about a tie. Later, when
the girl he invited to play with Xiaomu joined them on the court, making it a mixed doubles match, they were utterly defeated.
Xiaomu is so strong... A side note: there are many women with athletic talent, but beautiful women with athletic talent are truly
rare..."

"We started with beer, then switched to spirits. I drank quite a bit, but I was still relatively sober. Maybe when I felt
I'd had enough, that handsome guy sat down next to me in a rather suggestive way, making flirtatious jokes. I
didn't get angry with him. He then took the opportunity to touch my hand and put his arm around my shoulder, and I didn't stop him.

He suggested playing dice, but after two rounds, I said it was boring, and the loser had to drink, and he could
n't outdrink me. The handsome guy said he couldn't afford to play other games, and I could roughly guess what he wanted to play, so I pretended to be..."
I wasn't satisfied and let him decide how to play. He said whoever lost had to absolutely obey one condition from the other. I had no objections.

I won the first round, and I made him hop around the private room like a frog, croaking. I lost the second round, and
he asked to kiss me, which I agreed to. He thought I was lucky to even touch his lips, but I took the initiative
and stuck my tongue into his mouth. The kiss lasted quite a while, and the handsome guy took the opportunity to hug me and put his hand on my
butt, but I didn't react much. I didn't go home that night because I wanted to do something a little outrageous; otherwise,
why would I need to find a handsome guy? I have girlfriends. He probably felt that my initiative gave him a good chance,
so he suggested changing the game. This game was perfect for me to mess with him, and he was afraid that if I won, he would come out of the private room to see me as a complete
idiot. I didn't care anyway, and asked him how else he wanted to play.

He asked if I dared to bet with him to take off my clothes, one piece for each loss. Whoever was naked first lost completely and had to fulfill
one condition for the other. I laughed and said that he was the one who couldn't afford to play this game! It's summer now, and men
usually only wear three or four layers, right? That handsome guy came over wearing sandals and no socks, while I had
seven layers to take off, including socks. The advantage was obvious. He said that if a man and a woman bet on taking off their clothes, the man should have the advantage, but since the woman
had more layers, it should even things out. "Nobody's taking advantage of anyone else..."

I actually know what happened in the end that night, but I don't know the details. But I don't want to hear
the details. What I really want to know is what Xiaomu is thinking. As her ex-boyfriend, and someone who still genuinely cares about
her, and of course, she still cares about my ex-boyfriend, I can't accept hearing the details of Xiaomu's interactions with other men
. On the other hand, in my experience, it's best not to listen to a woman's secrets,
especially . You never know when trouble might arise. We're all out there, and I've managed to
stay relatively safe so far, partly because I try to avoid unnecessary trouble, whether it's
when I'm driven by lust or inexplicably moved—safety first. If it were another woman wanting to tell me this, I probably
would have already cracked a joke. But with Xiaomu, I can only let her continue. Firstly, it's obvious she's very determined to
do this; I don't think I've ever objected to anything she insists on. Secondly, I really want to know what the problem she's talking about
is.

"I lost the first round and took off one sock. He lost the second round, and the handsome guy
threw aside. I said, 'Taking off shoes counts, but I took off my shoes before taking off my socks, what about that?' He said
, 'I didn't say beforehand that shoes didn't count, you can take off your shoes even if you lose.' Then he grinned and asked me, 'Do you really want to see
my naked body? Do you want to see the top or the bottom? If he loses, you'll have to follow my instructions.' I said, 'I want
you to take your clothes off as soon as possible so you can go out and run naked.'

In the next few rounds, I lost more than I won, and I took off all my socks and shoes. The handsome guy also threw off his other shoe
. Then I lost another round, and he was very excited, grinning and asking me which item I was going to take off. When I took it off, he was dumbfounded
because I had a small lace shawl over my t-shirt. Because the color was similar to the t-shirt, he always
thought it was just a pattern on my clothes, not a separate piece. It turned out I only took off the shawl."
In the next round , it was his turn to lose. He thought for a moment and surprisingly took off his t-shirt. I had always thought he would take off his pants, and I'd be
thrilled to see his underwear and his bulging penis. This surprised me a bit. He's a little
chubby, but he's in pretty good shape; he probably exercises regularly. In the next round, I lost again.
This time, he didn't urge me; he just looked at me. "In this situation, which should I take off?"

I was listening attentively, but I didn't expect Xiao Mu to want to interact with me like this. I
choked for a moment, laughed awkwardly, and thought for a moment before saying, "I hope you didn't take off either of your clothes. "

Xiao Mu shook his head and laughed: "A bet is a bet. I was thinking of taking off my underwear since I was wearing a skirt, and he
couldn't see anything. But when I put my hand under my skirt, I regretted it a bit. I should have taken off my t-shirt instead; it's like being seen at the pool."
Okay , it didn't make much difference. I was in a really bad mood those few days, staying out late at work every day, not cooking,
just eating takeout and fast food, showering and going to bed, or playing games if I couldn't sleep. I hadn't done any laundry for days, and
all my usual underwear was just sitting in the bucket unwashed. Normally, I'd just wear a nightgown after showering at home,
putting on my underwear the next day before leaving the house. But that morning I overslept and was going to be late, so I hurriedly grabbed a
thong and put it on. Taking off a thong at that moment felt like I was seducing him. I
don't mind doing things randomly, but I couldn't let a guy think I was seducing him; that would immediately weaken my confidence.

I just froze there, and the handsome guy looked at me and smiled. Actually, although my private parts weren't completely exposed,
because I was taking off my underwear, my skirt was basically already lifted up, and my thighs weren't covered. I wanted to stay frozen for just one more second...
I just wanted to give him one more second of an advantage, so I gritted my teeth and took off my thong. The handsome guy immediately got excited
and said I should take off my skirt; he wanted to see me in my thong.

I lost the next round, and this time I took off my t-shirt. Then I lost again. This time I really hesitated,
unsure to take off my bra or my skirt. The handsome guy said that since I couldn't decide, he'd be flexible and I could leave it on for now.
" Let
he has to take them off for me." I tried my luck, but lost again. The handsome guy said, "Oh well
, I was lucky. A bet's a bet," and gestured for me to stand up. I stood in front of him. He walked behind me,
touched my waist, and unhooked my bra, but didn't take it off. Instead, he suddenly leaned against me, pressing
his back against mine, and whispered that after I took my clothes off, I had to fulfill one condition. He asked if I wanted to know
what it was.

I pretended not to know. He chuckled and said there were no conditions. Seeing
how upset I was, he asked if I wanted to have sex with him to release some tension. I knew he'd only come out to see if there was a chance
to have sex with me. His talk of releasing tension resonated with me. Anyway, I was already thinking of messing around, and...
Since I was already stripped down like this, I figured, "Let's do it!" I told him, "Fine, let's do it, who's afraid?

" The handsome guy was excited and asked if I wanted to go to a hotel or just do it there. I suddenly had a thought; I often hear about
people having sex in bar restrooms, so why don't we go to the restroom? I've never been there before anyway. The handsome guy, of course, had no objection, so...
He took me to the men's room. When we left the private room, we both had to put our clothes back on, but he took my
thong , saying he wanted to keep it as a souvenir. The bar's restrooms were separated into men's and women's sections. I asked him
if we wanted to go to the men's or women's room. The handsome guy said, "Of course, the men's room, the women's room is boring."

He went in to check; the men's room was occupied, so we waited. But before everyone left,
new people came in, so I had to go into the women's room for a bit before coming out, otherwise waiting outside would seem strange. Finally,
I found a quiet spot, and went in. The men's room smelled quite strong. We went into
a stall, and the handsome guy didn't take off his clothes, just pulled out his penis. But he wanted me to take off all my clothes. I
whispered, "Do other people take off their clothes when they have sex in this situation? The stall is so small, there's nowhere to put it,
I can't just leave it on the floor, can I? Anyway, I wasn't wearing underwear, I could just lift my skirt, so let's just get started."

The handsome guy insisted I take off all my clothes, saying he'd wanted to see me completely naked for years, even if he just held them up for me
. I had no choice but to take them all off, using my skirt to wrap my shawl, t-shirt, and other clothes together for him
to hold. People kept coming in during this time, and honestly, it was quite exciting.

He got hard immediately when he saw my naked body. He sat on the toilet, and I gave him oral sex for a while.
Then he told me to sit on him and move around. I moved a couple of times, and then he said I should turn around so
he could play with my breasts. Since I'd already done it with him, I figured I could do whatever he wanted. So I
turned around and sat on him again. The handsome guy squeezed my breasts hard and kept rubbing my nipples. Maybe he was trying
to stimulate me, but my nipples weren't actually my most sensitive spot.

His penis was long, able to go very deep, and with each thrust, it went in
very deep . Actually, I could control the depth myself, I didn't need to exert myself so much, but what was I doing? Like the handsome
guy said, it's just releasing, right? Since it's releasing, I had to go all the way. Every time I
sat down, it was harder and harder, like I was slapping his thigh, making a slapping sound. At first, the handsome guy was whispering
sweet nothings in my ear, saying that having sex with me was great, but then the sound got louder and louder, and he asked me if I wasn't
afraid of being heard? He asked me to be gentler. Guess what I suddenly thought of at that moment? "

I really admire Xiaomu's ability to seize the opportunity for interaction. She couldn't possibly not realize that telling me all this
was actually a kind of 'torture.' The problem is, even if it's torture, you can't torture me while also
discussing the details with me, right?" I told her somewhat awkwardly, "I don't know."

"I suddenly wondered, what would my boyfriend think if he knew what I looked like now? That girl only
stole him because she's taller than me, has bigger breasts, and might be better in bed,
right? You don't need to say..." She stopped me when she saw I was about to interrupt. "I know what you're going to say. Later, I understood some things
, and you just mentioned some things, I understand, it's not entirely about that. But at that time, I
just couldn't understand it, that's just how I felt. I felt I was already very good to my man, and if that still
didn't keep , then I'd just be even more seductive. I won't lose in a seductive contest!

The handsome guy told me to be gentle, but I refused. I had been holding back, not making a sound. To be honest,
the handsome guy was quite good, I actually felt very comfortable, but at that moment I suddenly didn't want to hold back anymore, and I didn't care about the men's restroom."
Are there any other people in there
slut, you want to go this far?" Then he pushed me up, made me hold onto the toilet tank,
put my back, and then fucked me from behind.

He lasted quite a long time, I think at least twenty minutes. Later, half of me was thinking,
"I want to be even more slutty, even more slutty," and half of me was really enjoying it, and to be honest, I'd never
done it in a public restroom before, so I had no experience. Usually when I have sex, I always moan, but this time the pleasure was so strong
that I didn't pay attention to the fact that I was in a public restroom, and I kept moaning louder and louder.

Suddenly, the handsome guy asked me, "It's a waste to cum outside, can I cum in your mouth?" At that moment, I suddenly...
"Chao , just shoot inside me, shoot it all inside me." The handsome guy got excited and fucked me even harder.
After my second orgasm, I was a little short of breath, and I couldn't come up with any new moans, just kept repeating "Shoot faster, shoot faster, shoot inside,
shoot inside!" In the end, the handsome guy ejaculated a lot, it flowed down his legs, and I had to use tons of tissues to clean it up
.

The handsome guy told me that he hadn't had sex with anyone for over a week, and he had saved up for ten days to ejaculate all of it into me. He even said...
I knew I was bold, but I didn't expect me to be this slutty. I guess that's a compliment, and I suddenly felt a little smug.
I told him to change the name he saved of me in his phone to "slut" from now on. The handsome guy said "slut" wouldn't do, it had to be "big
slut." I felt much better after venting like that than during the day.
When we came out of the cubicle, several men were urinating, looking at me and laughing. I felt like they could see my
bare butt under my skirt... "

Xiao Mu recounted casually, as if talking about someone else, using very direct language. Her boyfriend called
twice during this time, but she hung up both times.

I handed her a cigarette and lit one for myself. I don't usually smoke, only
occasionally when I need to socialize, but I always carry a pack with me. Xiao Mu is similar; she can go
to extremes, playing board games all night with a cigarette in her hand. She could go for months without smoking a single cigarette and be completely unaddicted. At this
point, I smoked, actually to let her rest and to give myself a break.

Xiaomu hesitated a bit; she seemed to want to smoke too, but she probably wanted to finish what she had to
say in one go. If we smoked in the car, we'd have to open the sunroof or the windows. Sitting in the car with the doors and windows
closed felt like being in a separate world. She spoke, and I listened; whatever she said, she wasn't worried
because I was the one listening. But with the windows open, we were connected to the outside world. While we
couldn't see anyone around, and her voice wouldn't carry far, that sense of security might be gone.

Sure enough, Xiaomu took the cigarette, opened the window, and then stopped talking. Instead, she turned her face to the side, looked out
the window, and smoked quietly. I finally didn't have to maintain a composed demeanor and meet her gaze. I glanced inside the car...
The electronic clock showed it was just past nine. I wasn't sure if Xiaomu would continue talking after I finished my cigarette.

After stubbing out her cigarette, Xiaomu didn't speak immediately
. Instead, she took out her phone and checked her messages and emails. Just then, her phone rang again. She glanced at it and immediately hung up; it was probably her boyfriend again.

While fiddling with her phone, Xiaomu suddenly asked me what I felt.

This was a difficult question to answer. Xiaomu is the kind of person whose thoughts and actions often speak directly to the truth. In her current
workplace, due to the prevailing atmosphere and traditions, a few flattering words to her superiors and a few polite exchanges with colleagues
are basically her limit. Back in her personal life, in front of her friends, she's basically true to herself.
Speaking indirectly in front of her is neither flattering nor respectable. But there are parts of the truth that can and cannot be said
, and I had to find the right balance, which was quite difficult. Actually, I felt a little wronged. Xiaomu and her boyfriend had broken up and gotten back together so many times, and now
I was the one trying to appease them and find a solution?

After thinking for a moment, I said, "I don't have any particular ideas yet. It's just a little unconventional sex
. Men and women, having sex with a handsome guy, nothing wrong with that, right? It's just that doing it in a bar bathroom
isn't very careful. A hotel room is better." I immediately added jokingly, "And don't go to budget hotels, those are
basically just hookups, the sheets are probably covered in all sorts of men's and women's fluids. A four- or five-star
hotel is better. Why didn't you come to me that day? Didn't you want to give me a free ride? You never think of me for good things!" I felt that
a mix of serious and joking was probably better at this point.

Xiao Mu smiled and said, "I would never come to you for something like this."

I put on a defeated look and joked again, "You sound very relaxed when you moan, I have to
admire you..."

Xiao Mu rolled her eyes at me: "What's that? I'm not a kindergartener. Women my age
, I can't say much, but at least half of them, it's not about whether they want to talk about it or not."

I believed that. I can't speak for other places, but in my city, which is considered a major metropolis in China,
more than half of ten women Xiaomu's age are definitely like what she described. I was just
chatting with her casually, intending to laugh it off.

Unexpectedly, my casual remark gave Xiaomu a new topic to discuss, and she actually brought the subject back: "
I'll say even the most disgusting things, and I said them all night long." She rolled up the car window as she spoke, "My
boyfriend suddenly sent me a text message."

I inwardly cursed myself for making conversation. That one sentence actually brought Xiaomu back to the original topic. Then I had to continue listening to Xiaomu's recounting. This time, she didn't stare intently into my eyes, but she still kept looking in my direction, occasionally meeting my gaze. I still couldn't relax for a second.
"I still had another man's semen inside my vagina. I wasn't wearing anything under my skirt. I was in the men's restroom with several men around when my boyfriend suddenly texted me! I saw it was from him and immediately opened it. He said he had just returned home and taken most of his belongings. He said it was good I wasn't home, to avoid the awkwardness of seeing him after the breakup. He wouldn't be back for a while, but he would come back to take the rest of his things. He sounded like he was moving out of a shared apartment with a friend. And he even said it was good I wasn't home. It is good, though; while I was looking for someone to vent to, my boyfriend had already successfully moved all his things to that woman's place. I really..." I don't know what to say.
After that handsome guy and I slept together once, he seemed to have figured out what I was feeling that night. If it were during our drinking and dice-rolling game, he would have been cautiously looking for an opportunity, but this time he suddenly got bold and loudly asked me if I enjoyed being fucked by him. We hadn't even left the bathroom yet, and there were still many men around. I didn't back down and asked him back, "Did you enjoy being fucked?" The handsome guy chuckled and said, "It was great, probably one of the best."
Looking at him, I suddenly felt that I wasn't so bad after all. "Then why didn't my boyfriend want me? I had a falling out with my parents, I had a falling out with some friends, and now they're asking me, 'Do you know why we objected in the first place? It didn't end well, did it?' Tell me, if you loved him so much, why did you break up with him?" What did I say?
I listened quietly, without saying a word. I felt that Xiaomu wasn't as calm as before; perhaps her current mood was somewhat similar to that of that night. That day, she was probably just as unwilling, just as lost, unable to accept the outcome, yet powerless to salvage it, even clueless as to why it had turned out this way. I remember there was another man later. Actually, I've begun to understand Xiaomu's state of mind. With her straightforward, frank, and uninhibited nature, in that state, even if she indulged in self-destruction and recklessness, she would be more thorough than others.
"Nobody wants me. So I'll go find someone who does. If I'm a little slutty, a little cheap, someone will want me. I'll be slutty, I'll be cheap, who can't do that? I originally just wanted to come out and mess around that day to relieve my stress. If it were according to the original plan, I could have finished work and gone home. But suddenly I changed my mind.
The handsome guy was much more explicit at this point. On the way back to the private room, he kept describing how slutty I was in my ear and asked me repeatedly what I thought of him. After we got back to the private room, he saw that it was getting late, almost midnight, and asked me if there would be any chance for us to go out again. I said, 'Do you really like fucking me that much?'
He laughed and said, 'Of course, I wanted to when we were in college, but you didn't pay any attention to me back then. You're really different from all the sluts in your department. You only had two boyfriends in four years of college. And you probably only slept with the guy we played basketball with, right? I asked ** later, and he said that the most he did with you was kissing. Don't even mention sex, you never even masturbated him...' The
** he was talking about was Xiao Mu's ex-boyfriend." I first learned that Xiaomu hadn't dated anyone in college since then. It was through her relaying a conversation with a guy she'd just slept with, who was now actively trying to hook up with her again. Life really is unpredictable.
Especially since the guy thought Xiaomu and I had slept together—that left me speechless. Maybe he was jealous that I had Xiaomu's virginity? I smiled wryly. Xiaomu seemed to suddenly realize she'd mentioned me in her earlier conversation. The guy, of course, never imagined Xiaomu would repeat his words to someone else. He certainly didn't mean me any harm; on the contrary, he might even have envied me. But Xiaomu probably felt that repeating those words was hurtful to me, and immediately smiled apologetically, patting my knee with a gentle expression. I indicated it was alright.
Xiaomu's pacing became slightly off at this point, probably because she was distracted by those few sentences involving me, and started mentally checking if there were any other conversations that touched on my behalf. So she glossed over her conversation with the handsome guy in the private room and went straight to the end.
"...I've made up my mind. Tonight I'm going to find a man who wants me. If he wants me, I'll give myself to him. I told the handsome guy, 'Let's not wait for next time. Don't you want to fuck me as much as you want? I'll give you the chance today. Fuck this slut a few more times, okay?'"
The handsome guy readily agreed, but since it was late and he had to work the next day, he hesitated. He asked if we should have another round of fun on the weekend, since it would be the weekend in a couple of days. He also mysteriously said he would bring some tools, and I should bring some sexy lingerie, and he could make me reach my peak.
I said no, only tonight. He said he could fuck me all night long, until dawn, and it would be void after that. He gritted his teeth and said he would just take the day off tomorrow. I said okay, but there was one more condition. I had to bring one of his good friends, another handsome guy who had pursued me in college.
The handsome guy was surprised and said, "You want to do a threesome?" I said, "Didn't you say I was a slut? Isn't a slut the more men the better?" At that moment, I was thinking of finding all the men I could think of who had wanted me and would definitely come, and I wanted them to fuck me, nonstop. I wanted it to never stop that night. That way, my mind wouldn't have any space to think about anything else.
The handsome guy probably really wanted to fuck me a few more times, so after thinking about it, he immediately agreed and then called another handsome guy to come over right away. That guy didn't believe him at all, saying, "If you want to play with me, don't use such an obviously fake excuse. If I fall for this, my IQ is definitely negative." The handsome guy then had me put our heads together, took a picture, and sent it to the other guy to show that we were indeed together at that moment. The other guy still didn't believe me, saying that the two of us were definitely teaming up to trick him.
The handsome guy then asked if he could take some more exciting pictures. I said yes, but absolutely no pictures of my face; if that was against the rules, we'd be done. Then I took off my clothes, and the handsome guy took pictures of my breasts and my vagina, then sent them to me, saying, "This is what Xiaomu took of you naked, don't push your luck!" The handsome guy finally agreed with some skepticism, and then called me again, asking if I really wanted to do it with them. I said directly, "Yes, come and fuck me quickly." He immediately became very enthusiastic, saying he was nearby and we should go to a hotel first.
We found a hotel, booked a room, and sent the room number to the other handsome guy. While waiting, the first handsome guy wanted to start with me, but I insisted that both of them arrive before we could begin.
The other handsome guy seemed to have been at another bar nearby, so he arrived in less than twenty minutes. From then on, there were two guys. The first handsome guy was called K, and the second handsome guy was called Z, probably the first letters of their surnames.
Once the three of us were together, we didn't know how to start. I've told you before that I've tried doing it with three people, but back then, the other person was also a woman, and she was with my boyfriend at the time. As long as my boyfriend and I started normally, it was okay. That woman was very playful and would join in herself. These two handsome guys usually go out quite a lot, but I don't think they've ever had a threesome.
If only one of them were there, they probably would have said and done everything already; but now that there was another person, they were both hesitant. I thought, who cares? I just need to let loose, so I'll do whatever feels good, whatever's outrageous.
Z hadn't done it with me before, so he was a little reserved and tentatively asked if we should take a shower first. I sat on his lap and said, "Why take a shower? Today I'm a slut, and I'm covered in slutty smells that can't be washed off. I don't care if you guys smell, I'll lick you all clean later."
Z was a little stunned after I said that. I lifted my skirt to show him that I wasn't wearing underwear and said that the guy over there had already fucked me, and he hadn't showered before. Z laughed and said, "You guys didn't even wait for me before you started." K took my underwear out of his pocket, twirled it in his hand, and laughed, "We did it at the bar, and then we came over here. Xiao Mu was waiting for you to arrive before we started."
I stood up from Z's lap, stood in front of them, and said bluntly, "You two can start fucking me now." From now until dawn, you can fuck me however you want, fuck me hard, fuck me nonstop, fuck me to death. At that moment, I even thought to myself, who cares about hemorrhoids, let me suffer the pain, if they want to fuck my ass, let them fuck me too.
Z was startled by my fierce and explicit words, after all, it was so different from how I usually acted in front of him. K, because he had drunk and chatted with me for a long time before, and had also slept with me once, seemed to understand my feelings that day, and immediately got into the mood, putting on a nonchalant look, leaning back on the sofa, and said to me, of course it's fun to play together, but everyone has to work tomorrow, it's not good to play all night, right? Besides, health is still very important, a drop of semen is worth ten drops of blood, I'm a slut, of course it's great to be fucked by them, but it's very tiring for them to fuck me, let alone fuck me hard and nonstop, it's too hard, if you want them to go through so much trouble to satisfy this slut, you have to see how I perform.
At first, I didn't understand what he meant, thinking, at a time like this, what performance does he need? It's not like I asked him for a favor. He wanted me to "show off," but that was just a way to blackmail me into sleeping with him. I've already said they can do whatever they want with me, so
what's the point of "showing off"? Then Z wasn't in a hurry anymore and just sat there watching me with a grin. I guess they wanted me to seduce them a little more, to do some foreplay or something. So I jumped onto the bed, took off my skirt and t-shirt, leaving only my bra on, and started twisting and caressing my body. They watched me excitedly, and I licked my lips and spread my labia for them to see.
Z stood up, wanting to come over, but K stopped him, saying, "What's the rush? If I had seduced my boyfriend like this before, he would have pounced on me long ago, but those two..."
Just then, Xiao Mu's phone suddenly rang. It wasn't a ringtone, but a text message. Xiao Mu glanced at it and smiled, saying to me, "Speak of the devil, and he appears. My boyfriend said that seeing how I left just now, he's conflicted again, and he feels he still loves me. He's starting to not want to break up with me." What do you think he means by saying this now?
I shook my head, thinking that it might be a long time before I could finish listening to Xiaomu's story, which she insisted on telling but which I didn't really want to hear. Xiaomu herself might interrupt my interaction at any time, and her boyfriend is here to interfere! The one sitting here now should be this bastard, listening to the details of his girlfriend having sex with another man. Why am I the scapegoat?
I said a little irritably, "He's your boyfriend, how would I know what he means?"
Xiaomu pointed at me with her index finger, laughing, "You're a man too, ask a man's opinion."
Actually, it's really hard for me to get angry with Xiaomu. If I say something and see her smile, my anger subsides a lot. After thinking it over carefully, I patted my knee and slowly voiced my guess: "He originally just wanted to come back to get something, and you came home. After you asked that question, he revealed his true feelings. At that moment, all he had to do was grab his things, storm out, and pull off a classic dump, ending the relationship smoothly and delivering the final blow to his ex-girlfriend.
But the plot suddenly took a turn. You, the woman who had just been hurt, didn't cry and beg him like some other woman, unlike what he secretly hoped would happen. Instead, you made a phone call right in front of him, and less than two minutes later, a man showed up and took you away.
Now it was his turn to be dumbfounded. You were the one who walked out of the house first, and not crying, but holding your head high as another man took you away. Of course, he couldn't see you crying in my car. He just felt like it was all a dream, as if he himself had been the one dumped. Of course, he was sure he wanted to break up with you, but it was him who dumped you; he definitely didn't like being dumped by you."
This feeling makes him a little anxious, and he probably won't leave immediately, but will wait in the room. He wants to see if you'll stay outside for a while and then go home. But now, about an hour has passed, and you haven't returned. He starts to worry that you've really left and won't be coming back. If that's the case, you'll have to find a place to stay that night. If you went to your parents' house, he might feel a little better. The problem is, he watched you leave with a man. He'll instantly have the thought that you might go home with that man, or go to a hotel and sleep with him.
He just cheated on himself, and even a fool would think the probability of you going home or going to a hotel with the man next to you is almost certain. Then countless details of sleeping with you in the past will flash through his mind, and he'll replace the man in those details with the person he just saw. Then he'll feel very depressed, and because he knows how good that feeling is, he'll feel particularly angry now.
Then he'll desperately want you to come home immediately. Even the slightest sound will make him think you've gone back and opened the door. Only by seeing you right away, or at least contacting you immediately, can he be sure you haven't spent the night with another man. And he'll increasingly want to have sex with you because after another man appeared, he suddenly feels he absolutely must conquer you. Even if you break up, he wants you to still only want to sleep with him in your heart…”
At this point, Xiaomu was laughing so hard she could barely contain herself: “Brother, in your mind, is the man I chose really that low-class? Sigh, never mind… Now it seems he really is… well, you know. So what do you think I should do…” Before she could finish, she received another text message.
After reading it, Xiaomu stared at me with a teasing look and said, “Then guess what he said this time?”

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