My cuckolded husband's diary

October 20, 2013 Today I finally confirmed my wife's affair with her colleague. They had sex over a month ago. I'd suspected it before because they always traveled for work together and were quite flirtatious. To be honest, that guy is more handsome and more accomplished than me. More importantly, my wife says he's much better in bed than me. However, my wife doesn't plan to divorce me. I should be angry, but I'm not. I know I have no right to deprive a woman of the happiness she can't get from me. My wife won't be home tomorrow night; it's the first time she's accepted another man's love without my knowledge. I hope I can get over this.

November 1, 2013 Our story is simple. My wife is 33 this year, not exactly a great beauty, and I'm just an ordinary person. We've been married for four years and don't have children yet. Her colleague is two years younger than both of us, still unmarried, and considers my wife his older sister. Now their relationship is semi-public in my eyes. They spent Halloween together again yesterday, and my wife still hasn't come home. She just called to say she'd be back after lunch. However, my wife hasn't abandoned the family; she still spends most of her time at home. A couple of days ago, I had a serious talk with her about this issue. I advised her to be careful. While I don't object to their relationship, or to her seeking pleasure or even excitement, that man (let's call him H) doesn't seem to truly love my wife or genuinely want to marry her. My wife said she understands. She just enjoys the feeling of being pampered by a tall, handsome, and wealthy young man; physical satisfaction is secondary, and she's not after material things. There's no need for her to abandon her family, so she refuses the money and expensive gifts H gives her and doesn't agree to be his mistress openly. As for their sexual encounters, my wife doesn't want to tell me the details, only saying that H is indeed very skilled (the kind with good physical attributes), and once he brought her to orgasm six times. But even then, she takes precautions, absolutely refusing to let him ejaculate inside unless it's 100% safe.

November 1, 2013: My wife just called, saying she'll be back tonight. H took her all morning. My feelings are complicated; I don't know whether I should be happy for my wife or sad for myself. Every time my wife comes back from H's place, she's like a completely different person, radiant with energy. It'll probably be the same tonight.

November 6, 2013. I argued with my wife yesterday because she said she agreed to be H's mistress—appearing in his social media circle as his mistress. I'm angry not because H made such an outrageous request, but because my wife actually agreed, going back on her promise not to make it public. My wife argued that my social circles and H's don't overlap, but secrets don't stay hidden forever. I feel I've been very tolerant, allowing them to enjoy all the pleasures of being lovers, but my wife said she doesn't want to keep doing this secretly. Tonight, H is going out to dinner and karaoke with friends, and my wife said she wants to go too, asking H to take her...

November 20, 2013. I finally convinced my wife not to reveal their relationship to anyone. However, I promised to allow them to travel together in the future, either alone or in a tour group, so they can be carefree during the trip. My wife said she still loves me and knows I'm good to her.

November 20, 2013: My wife just called to say she won't be home for dinner tonight. I asked if she'd be home to sleep. She said it depends. I said, "Then have fun." She then said she'd already "had her fun," left work early today, and was secretly calling me from H's house, planning another round tonight. I said, "Why are you two so eager? It's not like you can't see each other often." She said her period just ended yesterday, and H didn't want to miss the chance to "go all out." It made my heart ache.

November 23, 2013: My wife only got home yesterday afternoon. She and H had been crazy for two days and two nights. My wife told me H had sex five times, and she came inside every time. I asked how it felt, and she said she'd never felt so good before, and she couldn't even remember how many times she orgasmed.

November 25, 2013: I had a good talk with my wife last night. I think we both know what the other is thinking. My wife said she knew there was no future with H, that H didn't truly love her, and that he had never said he wanted to marry her, even if he had, she wouldn't have abandoned her current family. Sometimes she felt H was toying with her, yet she was unconsciously attracted to his charm, charisma, and physique, especially in bed—she was completely captivated. My wife believed H wasn't a bad person; at least he wouldn't exploit a woman's affection for him to hurt her. My wife said H wanted to see me, to come to our house, at an appropriate time, in a way that was acceptable to both of us. Perhaps possessing an ordinary woman and possessing someone else's wife felt completely different. My wife didn't immediately agree because she didn't know if I could accept it. If I hadn't proactively talked to her, she might never have conveyed such an "absurd" request. I was speechless for a moment… I asked my wife, "Do you want a strange man to walk openly into our home?" My wife replied that she was no longer a stranger to this man; the strangers were me and him—she no longer wanted to secretly move between two men, even with my tacit approval. Besides, it's not like we're asking him to move into our house permanently. What else could I say? Actually, all my hesitation stemmed from my pathetic inferiority complex. I'm just an ordinary man, with a moderate income, unassuming looks, a mild personality, and mediocre in that area. And I was about to face a man who could attract with his charm and conquer married women with his body. What I feared wasn't meeting my enemy, the bloodshed, but my own pale life under the bright sun. But what reason did I have to refuse? My wife still loved me, and I still loved my wife. I smiled and nodded: "He's always welcome in our home; this is our home." November 27, 2009 Tonight, H is coming to our house! December 1, 2009 Last weekend, H came to our house, along with my wife after work. The three of us had a simple dinner together, chatted about our respective workplaces, and after dinner, I tidied up while my wife chatted with him and watched TV, aimlessly changing channels. When I joined their conversation, I slowly realized that H seemed to have more in common with his wife. H was very understanding and found some topics that everyone was interested in. Before I knew it, it was past ten o'clock. H said he had to go back, but his wife said to stay a little longer, and then looked at me. I said, "Why don't you rest here? I don't have to work tomorrow anyway." Between declining and being persuaded, H stayed. His wife tidied up the guest room for H. I took a shower and went back to the master bedroom to sleep. Outside the bedroom door, I could hear the two talking and the sound of water running in the shower. I couldn't sleep. Less than half an hour later, his wife pushed open the door and got into bed. I asked, "Where's H?" She said he was asleep. "Did you take a shower together?" "No way!" His wife pinched me hard. There was a long silence. I couldn't sleep, she couldn't sleep, and I thought he in the other room must be asleep too. I could almost hear his wife's heavy breathing. I asked softly, "Missing him?" There was no answer. A few seconds later, his wife gave a faint "hmm." I reached out to explore that paradise, but it was a vast expanse of water... ...I know, it's not because of me. "Go on, it's okay." My wife turned around and whispered in my ear, "Really, you don't mind?" "Really." My wife still didn't move. I nudged her, but she didn't react. "Then I'll go to sleep first." I turned away. A few minutes later, I heard my wife getting out of bed, footsteps, the door opening and closing, opening and closing...

2013-12-3 That night, I don't know when I fell asleep. I only remember initially trembling uncontrollably, and I could hear my own heartbeat. I listened intently for a long time, but I didn't hear any movement from that room. Gradually, I calmed down and eventually fell asleep. I woke up at 9 o'clock the next day. My wife was already up, making breakfast in the kitchen, and H seemed to still be sleeping. I walked to my wife's side and looked at her mysteriously. She smiled and avoided my gaze. I quietly asked how the battle went. My wife said she was afraid I'd hear her at night, so she didn't dare to go all out. Plus, she forgot to get a condom from the room, so she only did it halfway before stopping. When she woke up in the morning, H couldn't hold back any longer and had sex with her intensely. (How could I have slept so soundly this morning? I didn't hear a thing!) What's even more infuriating is that H ejaculated inside my wife again this time. My wife said she's going to take her medication.

December 4, 2013 When my wife mentioned she was going to take her morning-after pill, I was furious. The harmful effects of such pills are obvious, and I've never let her take them in years. But she casually dismissed it, saying it was fine and that she only let him put it in to avoid soiling the sheets. "Are the sheets more important than your health?" I yelled angrily. "Don't be so loud, he might hear you!" she said, pointing to the guest room. "He's been awake, but he didn't get up because he was embarrassed to see you." I asked if she meant for him to just sleep like that. Then she told me to go outside and avoid her. Good heavens, this is my home! Why should I avoid her?! December 4, 2009 My wife noticed my displeasure and pulled me aside, whispering that she didn't mean anything by it, but H felt awkward having just slept with my wife and then having breakfast with me, and was worried I'd feel uncomfortable. She told me to go out for breakfast and wander around, and that she'd text me after H left. My wife spoke very sincerely, repeatedly thanking me for being good to her. Looking at her eyes, I nodded, put on my clothes, and went out. But it was a cold day, and there wasn't much to do. It was almost 11 pm, and my wife still hadn't texted me. She didn't answer my calls either. I figured H must be gone by now, so I decided to go home.

December 7, 2013. When I got home, I found the door locked from the inside. I called my wife; she didn't answer at first. Ten minutes later, I called again, and she answered. She begged me to stay away for a little longer, to come back in 20 minutes. My mind went blank… I went downstairs. Thirty minutes later, I got home. H was gone, the bed was made, and my wife was dressed neatly, but her hair was still a little messy.

December 9, 2013. I don't know if what I did was right. I didn't orchestrate this, nor did I make it up. I only know that my wife was happy with H. Last night, my wife told me that her happiness came from both H and me. She loves H, and she loves me too.

December 14, 2013: H came to our house again this weekend. This time, all three of us were much more relaxed. I wasn't kicked out, H didn't hide under the covers, and my wife didn't forget her condoms. My wife even brought her underwear and everyday items to the guest room, and H brought a few changes of clothes. We even watched a movie together on Saturday. However, they were still very restrained, not acting too intimately in front of me, and I didn't hear anything I shouldn't hear at night.

December 21, 2013: My wife has her period these past few days, but H still came over. It seems he considers this place home. The two of them gradually became more casual in front of me. A few scenes made my heart ache: 1. Watching TV at night, my wife was reclining on the sofa, her feet tucked into H's lap. 2. My wife and H discussed menstrual cramps and flow levels in front of me, oblivious to everyone else. 3. My wife said her mouth tasted bland. H grinned mischievously and asked if she tasted anything last night. My wife pretended to be annoyed. 4. My wife was changing clothes in the bedroom without closing the door. H and I were in the living room at that moment. 5. H casually adjusted my wife's bra strap, and she looked perfectly natural.

2014-4-3 H has moved into our house. To make it easier for my wife to change clothes and put on makeup, they moved into the master bedroom, and I slept alone in the guest room. So much has happened these past few days; it feels like a lifetime ago.

2014-4-3 From a medical perspective, perhaps I'm not impotent. Erection and duration are fine, and although the size is a bit small, it's within the normal range. My libido is also normal. But according to my wife, I lack passion in bed and don't give her any pleasure. Compared to her ex-boyfriend and H, I'm far inferior.

2014-5-5 Last night, I got up in the middle of the night and vaguely heard two people making love in the master bedroom. I couldn't sleep all night. Although I felt a pang of jealousy, my penis was rock hard, and I couldn't help but masturbate. H has brazenly gained the right to mate with my wife. He can openly and openly possess her for a long time without any worries. Even after so much time, I still can't calm down. H is becoming more and more natural at home, and my wife is in a good mood. When will I be able to completely accept all of this? May 14, 2010: Yesterday, H bought my wife a set of underwear costing over 400 yuan. My wife washed it and hung it on the balcony. I've always disapproved of their excessive financial dealings, but my wife said it was a small, commemorative gift. What was it commemorating? She didn't tell me. I only know that my wife was very happy. Perhaps, that's enough.

August 1, 2014: I accidentally discovered that my wife was using an early pregnancy test, and I felt terrible. We haven't had sex in a long time. If my wife is pregnant, it's undoubtedly H's child. I suddenly wondered if they planned to have the baby. This is a difficult question for me, because it's not uncommon for women to have children with their lovers, but I don't even have children of my own yet. H and his wife went out early this morning, apparently to meet up with H's friends. His wife is slowly becoming part of H's social circle, though I don't know under what pretext.

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My cuckolded husband's diary

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