love

I exhaled a long, slow puff of smoke, and it seemed I could see through the smoke, through the monitor in front of me
, and see you on the other end of the network, your smile as radiant as a blooming flower.

...

I reached out and turned off the monitor, lay down on my beloved lazy boy, and slowly closed my
eyes. I let the music flow around me. I seemed to enter a dream.

I saw you again, I dreamt of you, your tears flowing like a spring.

I flicked the ash from my cigarette. In the dark room, only the red glow of the cigarette butt shone. The roar of an engine
approached —a modified 1998cc V6 DOHC MIVEC
engine, a dedicated engine for the GPX model. The unique, powerful engine sound of the Mitsubishi FTO, mixed with the piercing siren,
swept past.

I got up, drew back the curtains, and opened the window. The scent of grass from the courtyard, mingled with moonlight and
fresh I took a deep breath, looking at this utterly unfamiliar little town at night.

The night deepened.

Looking up at the sky, gazing at the dazzling Milky Way, I couldn't help but think of the saying, "Love is like a shooting star in the sky, brilliant and
dazzling, leaving only memories."

...

Do you still remember me?

(I) Love is a luxury (1)

I was speeding along the streets of a small town in Jiangnan on my bright red Kawasaki ZZ-R1200 motorcycle. My unruly long hair
danced wildly at 90 mph, accompanied by the powerful roar of the motorcycle's 1164cc engine. I sped along,
attracting the attention of passersby.

Perhaps it was fate that led me to meet you at this corner. I have no regrets.

...

You like white. The first time I met you, you were wearing a white t-shirt, sky-blue jeans,
and white sneakers. You were carrying a comic book by Jimmy Liao and running lightly along that small road.

I knew that was a shortcut that would allow me to skip three traffic lights. I turned into the small road without hesitation,
at 60 mph. In a small area, the rear wheel swayed to the side, leaving a bluish-black mark on the ground. But what greeted me
was a white figure.

...

I still remember your panicked eyes, so pitiful, I almost fell for you immediately.

A car accident brought us together, a very old-fashioned plot, just like in Hong Kong and Taiwan soap operas, we met
and then fell in love.

That summer was so blissful.

Spring came and autumn went, and in the blink of an eye, it was the second summer since we met. I finally had you completely. That
night, I can't forget.

Love is a luxury (2)

I gently hugged your waist, whispered sweet nothings in your ear, let your little hands pound my chest, felt the warmth of your skin under your thin clothes through
my fingertips , the fragrance of your virginity made me lose myself in it, your slightly red cheeks
rested on my shoulder, I slowly stroked your hair, and made a vow with you for a thousand years.

I kissed your red lips, my palms stroked your waist and back, looking at your increasingly red face, looking at
the love shimmering in your eyes, and your slightly parted lips, I gently said "I love you", and then,
we hugged each other tightly. The friction of our bodies ignited a fire within us. I kissed your lips wildly,
our tongues entwining, exchanging our love. The mingling of our fluids, and your aroused body, made me
want to possess you more than ever before.

I kneaded your full buttocks forcefully, letting your body writhe against my chest. Your two full breasts
rubbed against my chest, your hands tightly holding me, your lips whispering my name. I lowered
my head and kissed your lips again, then took control of your soft, full breasts.

Everything was so natural. I removed your white dress, revealing your snow-white, jade-like skin, radiating a dazzling
light. The white lace bra couldn't conceal your full breasts. I embraced you from behind, my hands exploring your
lower abdomen, then moving upwards, gently caressing your breasts.

You breathed softly, saying, "I want to hold you, I want to hold you from the front." I didn't understand then, but
years later I understood: back then, what you lacked was a sense of security.

Love is a luxury (3)

Our hearts have never beat so passionately. Every beat is a perfect combination of love and desire. You
are in me, and I am in you.

After the passion, you lay on my chest, gently stroking my skin and looking at me tenderly.
I hugged you, smiling, smiling happily, as if I had the whole world.

I don't know who said, "Love is a shooting star in the sky. It shines and sparkles, leaving only memories."
Happiness is probably like that. It comes and goes as it pleases.

The wave of going abroad swept in, and I, from a well-off family, was also pushed onto the plane by this wave. My family had already
made everything for me, and the procedures had already been completed. As the first
student in the whole family to have the opportunity to study abroad, it was naturally treated as a top priority. When I learned of this, it was like a bolt from the blue. What is the future
? What road lies ahead? I don't know, and I don't want to know. Without you by my side, I can't breathe
.

You didn't shed a tear. You smiled slightly and encouraged me to embark on my study abroad journey, saying you would wait for me, always, forever
. But I could see the scars in your heart, the tears you didn't shed. I fell silent. I could only
soothe the scars in your heart with kiss after kiss, and in our lovemaking, let us forget the impending separation,
let your teeth marks cover my chest, and let my marks be deeply engraved in your body time and time again.

You said to me, "Love is a luxury." I didn't understand then, but many years later I understood that
for you, love could not be expected to be perfect, but only to be granted forever.

Love is a luxury.

(II) Love and the Kiwi (1) The plane landed in a country of blue skies and green grass—New Zealand. The cold wind made me suffer

in the small town airport . 　　That July, it was so cold, so cold.

Hearing your slightly trembling voice through the phone receiver, a thousand words in my mind could only be summed up in three:
"I miss you."

Every call with you was so mesmerizing; I could almost feel your joyful breathing.

I wanted to know everything about your daily life. I only wanted you to be beautiful for me alone, and I even swore with a smile
that I would remain chaste for you.

Studying abroad was incredibly dull and tedious. Six months passed, my car went from a GTO to a BMW
530i, and our phone calls dwindled from five or six hours to just a few minutes. A simple "Goodbye
" changed everything.

At that moment, everything in the world seemed to vanish. The dial tone sounded strangely harsh.
I hung up the phone helplessly, looking at the calendar on the wall. Our love ended on
the third day

fade? Was it because I didn't care enough, or did you fall for someone else and not cherish me
...?

That summer was so cold, so very cold.

Love and the Kiwi (2)

Yu Hongming - Searching for You

I loved you, and with that feeling, I decided to fly to find you.
The old address, just by taking a letter that was sent home last year.
I hesitated, I really wasn't sure how you would react,
whether you would be shocked, sad, or indecisive.
How could I start so you wouldn't cry?
How could I break this deadlock?
I dared not make things too complicated.
You have your family and your worries.
How could I admit that I was so foolish back then?
How could I say that I still miss you?
I just wanted to tell you in person that
the rain outside would stop, but
the emotion in my heart
would not stop.

You seemed to disappear into the sea of people. I put everything down and returned to Jiangnan, searching everywhere for the love that belonged to me in the past
.

Riding a faded Kawasaki streetcar, I shuttled through the streets again and again, hoping that you could see the figure that belonged only
to me. I waited in the bookstore you loved to go to, and appeared on the long street you loved to stroll. Every time I looked back, I hoped to see
you; every time I turned a corner, I hoped that the old plot would start again.

You did not appear.

Back in New Zealand, I said, I should forget you.

I said, I want to forget you.

Can you hear me?

Love and the Kiwi (3)

I drove alone to the depths of the mountains on the outskirts of the city, set up a simple tent in the old forest, and let
myself go in the moonlight. I turned off my phone, turned on my laptop, played an MP3, and closed my eyes to think of every
little thing .

Perhaps it was God's mercy that allowed me to meet the kiwi.

I said, "Kiwi, I'm so lucky to have met you."

You raised your proud long beak, and your little eyes sparkled. You, the pride of New Zealand,
comes from you to some extent.

I asked, "Kiwi, what do you think of love?"

You lowered your head and pecked at the damp earth, turning over a small earthworm. In your 7,000-year history,
love has become a thing of the past, and survival is the meaning of your existence.

I thought, "Kiwi, how do you pursue love?"

You said, "I have no wings, no feathers; flight is beyond my reach, love in the sky I can only dream of. I
have two feet to stand on the earth, I can run and chase love."

Opening my eyes, your pear-shaped figure fades into the distance, disappearing into the bushes.

Yes, love isn't the only thing in life, so why should I make things difficult for myself?

Closing my eyes, your figure appears and disappears in the darkness; I can't forget you.

But I still must pursue the love that belongs to me.

Perhaps, this world no longer has you.

(Note: Kiwi – The kiwi gets its name from its call, “kiwi,”
and is considered a symbol of New Zealand's nation, designated as its national bird. They often proudly say, “I am a kiwi,” meaning
“I am a New Zealander.”

The kiwi, also known as the sandpiper, is one of the most primitive bird species of sandpipers. Shaped like a pear, it is covered in fluffy, dense
feathers. It has neither wings nor tail feathers and cannot fly. However, its legs are short, thick, and powerful, allowing it
to run at speeds up to 10 miles per hour. When angered, it can kick another kiwi five feet away.

The kiwi's beak is sharp and long, serving as a third leg for balance when resting, resembling a tripod
. Its nostrils are located at the very tip of its beak, giving it a unique sense of smell, capable of locating objects up to 7 feet above the ground.)
Tiny insects beneath the soil
tree root holes during the day and only come out to forage at night.

They have small eyes and poor eyesight. Sometimes, when they encounter a fence blocking their way in broad daylight, they do not avoid it and
rush into it like a blind person.

Female kiwis usually lay eggs only once every one or two years, one or two eggs each time. Although they are
about the same size as ordinary hens, their eggs are five times larger than chicken eggs, equivalent to 1/3 or 1/4 of their body weight. In terms of
the ratio of bird weight to egg size, kiwi eggs are probably the largest eggs of all birds in the world.

Season: The seasons in New Zealand are different from those in China. December to February is about summer, and June, July, and August
are already winter.

(III) A Rusty Engine Without Love (1)

A fallen man may always evoke sympathy. I, who have lost my way, am like a rusty engine.

But some women just like to claim a rusty engine.

The city lights at night, a dazzling spectacle, have created countless lovesick men and women.

I found a corner in Golden Castle, reached out and ordered a special martini
. Under the bar's lights, the martini shimmered like a sapphire,
topped with a vibrant red cherry, looking exquisite. The unique vanilla flavor mingled with the aroma of the liqueur seemed to tantalize me.
A flame flickered in my heart.

I gently picked up the glass, just looking at the liquid inside. I remembered you saying, "
Boys who love martinis are fickle. With me, will you still drink martinis?"

I replied, "I love martinis because of the feeling,
the satisfaction of possessing something wonderful. Now you are my martini, an inexhaustible martini
."

"Sir? Are you all right?" A sweet female voice disrupted my
memories. Hmm, a waitress, short hair brushing her ears, a typical Asian woman's oval face, a small nose, and
bright, intelligent eyes. A cute Chinese exchange student, perhaps?

I smiled at her, "I'm fine. Thanks."

She looked at me as if she had seen a new toy, "Is this your first
time coming to my uncle's castle right
? I've never seen you before."

I nodded.

"Are you from China?"

I nodded, and she jumped up with joy. "Wow, this is the first time I've seen a Chinese
person wearing a suit to drink. Are you a student?"

I smiled wryly, took a sip of wine, and let the taste spread in my mouth. "Surprised? I'm Messi's student."

When she smiled, her eyes were like two crescent moons. She extended her right hand to me. "My name is Yoyo. It's
nice to meet you." I shook her hand gently. Her hand was a little cold, and I couldn't help but use a little force. "Brendon
, call me Brendon."

A rusty engine has no love (2)

Yoyo was undoubtedly a girl with outstanding qualities. Her suitors always waited
at the bar entrance in all kinds of super cool sports cars. With such a young and beautiful girl to serve, Golden
Castle's business was naturally booming.

Yoyo's uncle, Chen, was quite my type. He liked to wear jeans under a beige casual
suit jacket, a white-filtered bottle of 555 (a brand of instant noodles), and lean against the left side of the bar, swirling a
crystal glass in his right hand, letting the amber liquid flow slowly inside.

Chen and I got to know each other first. Our views on things, objects, and women were surprisingly similar in
some ways . After a few drinks, we started calling each other brothers.

Over the next few weeks, Yoyo started calling me "Big Brother" all the time, and she knew everything about me.
I became her best shield, or, to put it more politely, her protector.

Yoyo is also a student at Messi University, having enrolled four weeks ago. She even chose Information
Technology! This girl, for convenience, switched two core papers, essentially
making me her personal chauffeur. Chen treated me to a nice meal because of this, and since then, he's been sleeping in every day
…

The way she looks at me from afar tells me that a girl who's never been in a relationship has fallen for a
dreamer she shouldn't be loving.

Late at night, when no one's around, Yoyo always calls to remind me to pick her up early the next morning. Sometimes
we'll have breakfast together. Yoyo's sometimes blatant gaze makes me feel uncomfortable;
I, without a heart, can't bear her burning love.

Chen talked to me several times, essentially wanting to entrust Yoyo's future to me. I said,
"Chen, how long have you been wearing that chain around your neck? Can you take it off?"

Chen fell silent…

…

Yoyo's birthday arrived. This simple Leo girl insisted I go to Sydney with her
. We rented a yacht to cruise the Sydney night view. The lights on the bridges and railings shone brightly, like
a rainbow connecting the sea and the Milky Way, coinciding with the midnight chimes.

"Happy birthday." My gift was a bunch of lavender I had grown in my yard
.

Yoyo jumped and cheered happily on the yacht, like a child. I peered out at the Milky Way,
so beautiful in the black velvet night sky. I wondered, which star is watching over you? Do you know how much I
miss you ?

Yoyo suddenly hugged me, her young, hot body pressed tightly against my back. I shuddered. The girl
's body had a great attraction for me. I am not a saint, nor am I incompetent, but I am like a
rusty engine.

A rusty engine does not need love.

A rusty engine has no love (3)

I gently patted Yoyo's hands, and she hugged them even tighter.

"Brother, I don't want to let go."

I sighed. "Brother, I just want to hold you like this. I can hear your heart."

She didn't know, but I could feel her heart, that heart that was beating.

I didn't know how to refuse. Maybe I was afraid of hurting this innocent girl's heart, or maybe I wanted to forget
you through her. I didn't know what to do. When Yoyo faced the sky and the sea and loudly confessed her feelings for me,
I became weak and scared. How can a rusty engine regain love?

The moonlight on the sea was exceptionally bright, illuminating two different hearts on the yacht. The girl's red lips clumsily
kissed me , her shy, fragrant tongue searching for an attractive partner in my mouth. I dared not look into her dark, bright eyes,
where too much naked love lay, like a sharp knife, cutting into my already
darkened heart, slice by slice.

The waves gently lapped against the yacht, rocking it from side to side, the slight sea breeze carrying the salty smell.
Yoyo lifted her blushing face, her eyes filled with shyness, "Brother, take me? I love you so much." At that
moment, I was speechless.

What exactly is fate? Where is love? Fate made her fall in love with me, but my love
was not with her.

The youthful body held too many secrets, beads of sweat seeped from her fair, smooth skin, Yoyo's eyes...
Besides love, there was also lust. A soft moan escaped her slightly parted lips. My left hand gently kneaded Yoyo
's full breasts, while my right hand explored her crotch, a place teeming with moisture.

"Brother...it hurts!" a delicate cry rang out. My heat broke through the tight barrier, completely taking over that
place.

Yoyo shed silent tears, kissing my lips tightly, like a thirsty traveler frantically sucking at
his saliva. I looked at her tenderly, gently wiping away the tears on her face. At that moment, I couldn't distinguish whether the person before me was
her or you.

Once she had adjusted to my entry, she wrapped her arms tightly around me and whispered in my ear, "Brother, I'm so happy.
I love you."

I held her earring in my mouth and replied, "I love you too."

My heart ached.

She moaned softly beneath me, my thick, hard penis moving slowly back and forth. Her burning, wet vaginal
walls writhed, and she bit her lip, savoring the new sensation. Her hips
swayed involuntarily with my movements, her legs wrapping around my waist, her slender waist twisting beneath me. My movements, gentle at first, gradually intensified
; how could a young girl resist the onslaught of a seasoned expert?

Yoyo shuddered, her first climax arriving. Her eyes were glazed,
her face flushed crimson. I bit her lip, exchanging saliva as we shared the pleasure of sex.
"Brother, am I ascending to heaven?"

I forgot everything; only the friction and stimulation of flesh against flesh reminded me of my own existence. I
thrust rapidly, her virgin vagina so tight and burning hot, my hands kneading her exceptionally full
breasts, shaping them in my hands.

She closed her eyes, waves of intense pleasure washing over her, causing her to moan incessantly. I growled,
gripping her breasts tightly with both hands, thrusting my hips forward, the tip of my penis penetrating deep into her, reaching the very
depths , ejaculating violently. Yoyo bit my shoulder, slowly calming down, leaving only
our rapid breathing in the cabin.

Yoyo fell into a deep sleep in my arms. I opened my eyes wide, afraid to fall asleep, afraid to dream of you.

Even afraid to think of you.

The rusty engine has no love (4)

...
Where have all the flowers gone?
Where have all the flowers gone?
Where have all the young girls gone?
Where did they all go?
Where have all the young men gone? Where have
the soldiers gone?
Where have all the graveyards gone?
Where have all they gone?
...

Yoyo sang softly, a faint melancholy lingering in her voice. I woke up. "Brother, morning
kiss!" Yoyo childishly hugged me, demanding a good morning kiss. I pulled her into my arms,
a long French kiss making her weak all over.

"Little girl, do you know how powerful your brother is?" I tapped her little nose. She gently stroked
my chest with her small hands, burying her head in my chest. "Brother, I was so happy last night."

Another fierce battle ensued.

...

By noon, we were both starving and finally remembered it was time to return the yacht. Before going ashore, I deliberately took
a picture of the white sheets stained with virgin blood. Those dark red bloodstains kept replaying in my mind
, questioning my soul. I looked at the sea, at the seagulls soaring in the sky. Could I let go? I asked
myself.

Chen saw Yoyo nestled nestled behind me like a little bird, and was taken aback at first, then smiled and gave me
a thumbs up, "You little rascal, my Yoyo is all yours now."

I smiled wryly, "Chen, you're really that confident?"

Chen poured me a beer. Yoyo went back to her room to change. Watching her retreating figure, Chen
looked into my eyes and asked, "You've let go? You've accepted her wholeheartedly?"

I shook my head, "Chen, I don't know."

Chen got angry, "Then how could you agree? Have you thought about the responsibility?"

I downed my beer in one gulp, looking firmly into Chen's eyes, "I don't want to hurt her heart,
I just want her to be happy like before. I can't bear to reject her, I will love her well."

Chen was silent. I said, "Chen, I will try to forget the past and cherish the present. It's not that I
don't understand love, but that I can't bear it."

I am that rusted engine, will Yoyo be the rust remover?

Even a rusted engine yearns for love.

(IV) The Lost Kiwi (1)

Yoyo's days with me seemed filled with laughter. I accompanied her on a journey through New Zealand from south to north.
From Bluff at the southern tip of the South Island to Cape Reinger at the northern tip of the North Island, from golden beaches to glacial landscapes, from volcanic
hot springs to the world's highest waterfall, and the adorable New Zealand dolphins and penguins, I forgot everything, indulging
in sightseeing…

Although my family is wealthy, my parents started out frugally. This trip
nearly depleted my annual living expenses; in less than a month, I had spent over 100,000 RMB.
Even I, who am used to spending money lavishly, felt a little ashamed.

One evening after dinner, after swiping my card, I shrugged and smiled, saying, "Baby, it's time to go back."

Yoyo smiled and hugged my arm, saying sweetly, "Thank you for spending so much time with me… I love
you…"

I smiled, looking at the beach outside the holiday villa window, gazing at the sunset on the horizon, and suddenly felt weary
. Is this the life I want? Is this the love I want?

The Lost Kiwi (2)

I sat in front of the computer and opened my email account, which I hadn't used for over a month. My fingers skillfully entered the password, typing
in that familiar string of characters, forming a rather glaring string of asterisks, a few letters, and a few numbers. Before my eyes,
the red words seemed to appear: "Lan Aixin for life."

A sudden, sharp pain shot through my heart. I stared blankly at the computer screen, my face pale, my hand tightly
covering my chest, as if I could cover the deep wound and stop the blood from flowing...

I still can't forget...

"Hmm..." Yoyo turned over, exposing her round, smooth shoulders to the air. Her quiet
little face was buried in the soft pillow, a faint smile showing. It must be a sweet dream.

I snapped out of my reverie, got up, poured myself a glass of gin, and let the bitter taste of juniper and the rich
aroma of alcohol stimulate my tongue, throat, and all the way to my stomach. I squinted my eyes, letting the alcohol linger in my mind and
its aroma waft in my nose. The clear liquid seemed to give me some strength. I got up, put down the glass,
walked to the bedside , gently hid Yoyo's slender hand under the covers, and kissed her hair.

I sat quietly on the edge of the bed, quietly watching Yoyo, and dialed Chen's number.

The Lost Kiwi (3)

arranged to meet Chen at the bar. Chen was sleepy, with stubble on his face and yawning
. When he saw me, he muttered, "Hey Brendon, you woke me up so early in the morning. You didn't want to have a drink with me, did you
?"

I smiled slightly, found a high chair to lean against, ordered a glass of ice water, and sat there quietly,
gently .

After a brief silence, Chen shook his head, seemingly trying to shake off some of his sleepiness.

"About Yoyo?"

I nodded.

The ice cubes gently collided and melted in the glass; the small, crystal-clear ice cubes were my favorite. I
gently placed one in my mouth, the icy coolness rolling on my tongue, then chewed it a couple of times, my mouth full of ice shards, which quickly
melted into my chest—extremely refreshing. For the entire morning, Chen and I sat quietly at the bar
, not saying another word.

Stepping out of the bar, the warm sunlight shone on my face. Not far away, wild ducks on the shore of Duck Lake were still chasing and playing happily
. Children laughed and scattered breadcrumbs into the sky. Unidentified birds spread
their wings and soared in the clear blue sky. A gentle sea breeze blew from the west, ruffling my hair. It seemed as if I had an epiphany.

The Lost Kiwi (4)

Night deepened.

Looking up at the sky, gazing at the dazzling Milky Way, I couldn't help but think of the saying, "Love is like a shooting star in the sky; it shines brightly,
it sparkles, leaving only memories."

...

Have I forgotten?

Yoyo sat quietly beside me on the garden bench, her head resting on my right shoulder. A few strands of her hair playfully
tucked into my collar. I lowered my head, greedily inhaling the girl's delicate fragrance.

The bright moon in the sky quietly cast its cool light, dispelling the layers of dark clouds, and the Milky Way seemed within
reach.

Yoyo childishly raised her hands, mimicking a camera lens, cheering at the Milky Way. I tenderly
embraced her waist. At that moment, my mind was filled only with Yoyo, her every smile and gesture; my heart had
been completely occupied by her...

"Ah! Honey!! Look, look!" Yoyo suddenly exclaimed excitedly, "A shooting star,
a shooting star!"

I looked up and watched a streak of light flash across the sky, disappearing into the heavens and earth. I kissed Yoyo's
lips and whispered, "Make a wish, a wish that we'll be together forever."

"I love you! My dear wife."

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