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"I Became the Matchmaker Between My Father and Wife" - (31) Confidant 

My scream echoed in the bedroom, startling my father-in-law, who was in the throes of desire. He stood there nervously, at a loss for what to do. I, too, was bewildered by my own sudden outburst; time seemed to stand still, and the atmosphere became incredibly tense.
I was the first to break the silence. I thought of many things to say, but the first question I asked was "Why?" because it was also the question in my heart: why did my father-in-law suddenly walk into my room? I desperately wanted to know the answer.
My father-in-law pondered for a long time, hesitant to speak. But the answer that followed was completely unexpected. It turned out that he hadn't been drunk and asleep that night; he had woken up halfway through the act and witnessed everything. I was astonished. I had assumed he hadn't discovered what happened that night. Suddenly realizing he knew everything, my face burned with shame. I wanted to escape and deny it, but I couldn't find an excuse or reason, and could only stammer, unable to utter a word.
Perhaps freed from the oppressive atmosphere, my father-in-law began to confide in me, little by little. It turned out he had known all along about my husband's sexual problems. Combined with my masturbation on him that night, he had started to worry about me and our family. Furthermore, his unresolved sexual needs in his later years after my mother-in-law's death, coupled with the influence of alcohol, led him to his impulsive actions that night. At this point, everything became clear to me.
Gradually, I was moved by my father-in-law's sincere emotions and words, and I believed that everything he said was genuine. My husband and I hadn't provided him with much happiness in his later years, yet he, at his advanced age, still toiled and worried for this family. My husband's family wasn't wealthy when he was young, and his mother was seriously ill. At that time, my father-in-law single-handedly supported the family, and he never gave up. That required such immense willpower. Thinking of this, I suddenly felt that my husband and I had failed him. Seeing his tears streaming down his face filled me with unbearable sorrow. Especially when he tried to leave the family to escape what had happened that day, I finally couldn't suppress my emotions anymore; I couldn't find a reason to blame him.
As my father-in-law turned to leave the room, I suddenly grabbed him without thinking; it was truly an instinctive reaction. Thinking of his tearful apology and frail body, I couldn't bring myself to blame this poor old man. I decided to do something for this kind and simple man.
I started masturbating my father-in-law, wanting to help him release his pent-up emotions and do something for him. Gradually, his previously limp penis became erect again. Although I had seen it once before, I was still shocked by its large size. Perhaps because of the alcohol, my senses were dulled; my hand was getting tired, but my father-in-law still showed no signs of ejaculating. At the same time, my own desire grew stronger. I couldn't just satisfy my father-in-law alone; I needed to satisfy myself too.
Just then, I suddenly remembered a form of mutual masturbation I had seen in a pornographic article a while ago: using one's legs to masturbate another while simultaneously rubbing one's own genitals. Without penetration, it was considered the most stimulating and pleasurable form of masturbation. Thinking about this, I suddenly felt an itch, my genitals became increasingly itchy, and I felt myself becoming wet.
Thinking of this, I lay down and, following the method described in the novel, slowly moistened my legs with my vaginal fluid, sandwiching my father-in-law's penis between them. My father-in-law wasn't too oblivious; he immediately understood and began thrusting. Instantly, a wave of pleasure surged from my genitals. The friction between my father-in-law's thick, long shaft and egg-sized glans during the thrusting was countless times more stimulating than masturbation. However, due to ethical considerations and restraint, I suppressed my moans, perhaps afraid of being dissuaded by my father-in-law, or perhaps still feeling some inner resistance.
Just as I was secretly enjoying myself, I suddenly saw a pair of dark shadows slowly reaching towards me on the bed. I felt strange and turned around to see that it was my father-in-law reaching out to grab my breast. A sudden feeling of resistance welled up inside me. I don't know why I resisted my father-in-law touching my breast. Logically speaking, he had already kissed my genitals, so what did it mean for him to touch my breast? But my body's instincts still rejected him. After thinking it over carefully, I realized that I still wanted to reserve another private space for my husband, perhaps this would lessen my guilt. Seeing my refusal, my father-in-law gave up.
My father-in-law's thrusts became increasingly powerful and varied. The intense stimulation and pleasure finally made me unable to suppress my moans. I began to let out loud moans, the stimulation and exhilaration making me feel like I was about to fly into the blue sky, my body floating. The feeling was indescribable. My father-in-law's thrusts became more and more vigorous, and finally, with a powerful thrust, we both reached orgasm simultaneously. I climaxed, and my father-in-law's semen filled between my legs, flowing down onto the bed.
After the passion subsided, what followed was guilt and self-reproach upon regaining my senses. After my father-in-law left, I couldn't suppress the guilt and sorrow I felt towards my husband. I wanted to cry out loud, but I couldn't. I tried to grab a tissue to wipe away the semen, but I underestimated the amount of semen my father-in-law ejaculated. The thick semen covered my legs, and when I stood up, it flowed down my legs, onto my heels and slippers. It seemed I couldn't wipe it all away with tissues. I could only suppress my grief, keep my legs together, cover my groin with my hands, and try my best to prevent the semen from flowing down my legs and onto the floor, as I slowly walked to the bathroom to give myself a thorough cleansing.
After washing up, I saw my husband in the photo. Overwhelmed by longing and guilt, I burst into tears. I couldn't suppress my desires, nor could I bring myself to hate my father-in-law. This complex and contradictory emotion overwhelmed me, to the point that I couldn't concentrate at work today. After get off work, I sat quietly in the community garden for a long time, thinking about the times my husband and I would take selfies and stroll there, and also about last night's passion—both blissful and painful. Ultimately, I had to face it. I mustered my courage and went home. When my father-in-law saw me, he didn't greet me as usual. I knew he was probably feeling even more guilty and remorseful than I was. I decided to take the initiative and try to mend the relationship between him and me. I asked him to make me noodles, and I saw relief and relaxation in his eyes.
Back in the bedroom, I called my husband with a guilty feeling. He was still as optimistic and cheerful as ever, and even though he was so tired from work, he couldn't help but make me laugh. Hearing his voice, all my grievances welled up and I couldn't control my emotions, so I cried. My husband almost noticed that something was wrong with me. But before we could finish talking, my father-in-law suddenly walked in and interrupted us.
My father-in-law and I were having dinner when he suddenly suggested that we stop having intimate contact. Hearing this, I felt a little comforted, because he's still a good father-in-law; the fact that he was willing to give up showed that our family is the most important thing to him, and that he could overcome his desires. At the same time, I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed, as if I didn't want to give up the wonderful and satisfying experience of the previous night. Since he had brought it up, I couldn't say anything, and it was a good opportunity to end this illicit affair. However, my feelings for him deepened; I felt an even stronger appreciation for him—a kind of appreciation for men. His image suddenly became much more imposing in my eyes.
After washing the dishes, my father-in-law and I watched TV and chatted. Through our conversation, we had resolved our differences. We hadn't actually talked much before, but at that moment, we talked a lot. Chatting with him made me feel more relaxed than ever before. I never realized before how well we could connect; it was as if we were meeting for the first time, and we had so much in common. Suddenly, he became a confidant in my eyes, and so incredibly charming. Even as it was time to go to bed, I felt a lingering sense of satisfaction.
Now that things have come to this, I really don't know what my relationship with my father-in-law will be like in the future. Maybe it will go back to how it was before, but our relationship is closer than ever. However, there's a problem I find difficult to talk about: how am I supposed to satisfy my physical needs? How am I supposed to deal with my sexual desires? ...

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