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I only love dogs, not immortals. 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-03-24  
Chapter One:
The immortals in the celestial realm, spending their days idly, were incredibly bored, thus providing fertile ground for gossip.
Listen, early in the morning, several immortals were running around announcing:
"Did you know? His Majesty the Jade Emperor's ninth prince—Prince Jingyan—has a sweetheart."
"Poor thing! Of all the bad luck, Prince Jingyan has fallen for Yang Jian, the disciple of Jade Cauldron Immortal, the handsome young man with the immortal title 'Pure Source Wondrous Dao True Lord,' poor thing!"
"Poor thing? You really don't know, or are you pretending? Although Yang Jian is handsome with rosy lips and white teeth, like a porcelain doll, he has a terrible quirk: he loves dogs more than people!"
"Yang Jian's mount is still the divine dog Xiaotian, but in reality, their relationship is ridiculously close; someone even saw them kissing! Sigh, these young immortals these days, they really will do anything!"
"Yesterday, Fairy XX happened to witness Prince Jingyan confessing his love to Yang Jian! Yang Jian rejected him on the spot, embracing his dog, Xiaotian, and saying, 'I want to love him and stay with him for life.' Poor Prince Jingyan, I wonder if he cried."
"Hey, Prince Jingyan was just summoned to the palace by the Jade Emperor. I wonder what will happen. Quick, quick, let's go and guard the palace gates. If we can bribe a few of the Jade Emperor's personal maids, that would be even better."
A large group of idle and bored immortals rushed to the Jade Emperor's Golden Palace, determined to get the latest gossip.
Meanwhile, in the study of the Golden Palace—
"You are my youngest son, my most beloved son. I want you to be happy and joyful, but why did you fall in love with him? Sigh—!" The Jade Emperor rubbed his tightly furrowed brows, looking extremely troubled.
"Why can't I fall in love with Jian? There's no rule in the Heavenly Decree that says male immortals can't fall in love with other male immortals," Jingyan retorted, then switched to a very gentle tone. "The moment I first saw Jian, I knew he was my true wife. He's the only one whose soul resonates with mine. I will marry no one but him!"
"You... he's not saying he's only going to marry you. He's already made it clear he loves someone else. Shouldn't you step aside and let him have his love?"
"Father!" Jingyan pressed closer.
"W-what are you doing?" The Jade Emperor was terrified. Although he was his son and incredibly handsome, such an imposing aura still made the father a little bit afraid.
"He likes a dog! Can a person and a dog marry? Besides!" He slammed his hand on the desk. "Look at him from every angle, where am I inferior to that stinky dog? No! I'm far superior! If Jian loves him blindly, he'll regret it and be heartbroken one day. I absolutely will not allow that to happen, so I'm going to steal Jian's heart, make him love me, and marry me!"
"...Your words are so domineering." Had his parenting methods gone wrong? The Jade Emperor wondered to himself.
"Father! You don't object, do you?"
"What will you do if I object?" the Jade Emperor asked timidly. Would he commit patricide?
"I'll tell Mother about your youthful crush on xxx, and Mother will give you a good scolding." Jingyan grinned, revealing his gleaming white canine teeth.
"Haha! You're my most beloved son, how could I possibly object to your happiness? Child, charge for love! I'll cheer you on!"
"I knew Father was right, Your Majesty, I take my leave!"
Heavenly Palace.
"Your Highness, you're back!" Shi Yan stood respectfully at the entrance of Chunhui Palace .
"Why are you awake?" Jingyan asked curiously.
His servant's true form was a water lily, capable of transforming into human form without changing his nature. He spent eight or nine hours a day sleeping, with the remaining time devoted to eating. Every time he returned from outside, without exception, he found Shi Yan fast asleep, unless Shi Yan was out playing and hadn't returned.
"Princess Yu Chen is here. She kicked me awake," Shi Yan said, rubbing his bottom, soundly aggrieved. "She's waiting for you in the living room!"
"I see."
Princess Yu Chen was the fourth daughter of the Queen Mother of the West, exceptionally beautiful, and loved watching excitement, but her weakness was a tendency towards violence.
Jingyan entered the living room and saw the princess elegantly sipping tea.
"You're back!" she said softly. "I heard you experienced something very exciting yesterday. Can you tell me?"
"The gossip spreads so fast, even the Jade Pool knows?" No way!
“I’ve been visiting the Heavenly Consort—your mother—recently, which is why I got the news so quickly.”
“Since you already know, why make me repeat myself?” He picked up the tea Shi Yan offered and blew on it lightly.
“Hearsay is disjointed and can never compare to the accounts of those involved. Tell me, Yan!”
Her tone was almost coquettish; anyone unaware of the situation would think she and Jing Yan were lovers, flirting and teasing each other! But she was definitely defending her position as the Queen of Gossips.
“Sorry, I cannot disclose personal information!”
“You’re so stingy! If you don’t tell me, I won’t tell you the secret to making Yang Jian give you a kind look.”
“Hmph, you don’t need to teach me that. Jian will definitely succumb to my charm.”
“Ha! I’ll be waiting for you to beg me at the Heavenly Consort’s. Until we meet again.” With a charming smile, Yu Chen transformed into a ray of light and flew towards the Golden Palace.
"Looking down on me! Humph!" Jingyan finished his tea in one gulp. "Shi Yan, hurry up and prepare these things for me." He took out a large piece of paper from his pocket, which was covered with tiny writing.
Daily Gossip Broadcast Schedule:
Day 1 –
“Prince Jingyan played the flute outside Jinyin Palace (Yang Jin's immortal abode) all night, his lips swollen from playing. He was chased by Yang Jian because the flute music caused Xiaotian Dog to have insomnia.”
(Qingxuan: Don't ask me, “Do dogs have insomnia?”)
Day 2 –
“Prince Yingyan personally picked 999 roses and scattered them from the sky into Jinyin Palace. He was chased by Yang Jian again because the fragrance triggered Xiaotian Dog's chronic illness – pollen allergy, causing him to sneeze all night.”
(Qingxuan: Don't ask me, “Do dogs have pollen allergy?”)
Day 3 –
“Prince Jingyan wrote a beautifully written love letter of ten thousand words, but Yang Jian used it as a mattress for Xiaotian Dog, commenting, “No class.”
…………
…………
…………
Day 30 –
“Prince Jingyan plunged into the Golden Cloud Palace and didn't come out for a whole day. He probably gave up! He's been working hard for a month, that's about it!”
"The best strategy is to win hearts. Yang Jian's heart is with Xiaotian Dog. You've only been trying to please him this month, of course you can't win his heart. Remember, you have to fawn over Xiaotian Dog, show absolute sincerity, don't wear a bitter face, and definitely don't act like you're meeting a rival, all murderous and glaring at him, you stupid man!"
Yu Chen's smug smile and defiant words churned in Jingyan's mind, confirming once again that women were indeed irritating creatures, because they were relentless when they were right.
Clutching the gold-threaded dog collar she had sewn herself, he felt utterly disgusted. To actually make him fawn over a dog? It was an insult to the immortals! But a month of failed courtship left him with no choice but to try again, even if it meant another failure.
"Oh! Isn't this Prince Jingyan! Wait for this old man!" An old man hurried after Jingyan, who was walking with his head down.
"Laozi, what is it?" He was in a hurry to find Jian and didn't have time to deal with this annoying old man.
"That's right! This morning I refined a magic pill that will make one radiant and glowing, and I specially presented it to Your Highness for your enjoyment."
"I don't need it." This should be suitable for an old man, especially the kind of dead old man going through menopause, looking like a wilted eggplant.
"You will need it." Laozi chuckled, "Because you're going to see your sweetheart, right? Of course, you want to show your most charming side, but right now your complexion is ashen and your forehead is dark, so you can't show your charm."
"Really?" Jingyan touched his face, thinking: It's probably because I've failed too many times.
"Eat it quickly!" He took out a brocade box and opened it.
"Alright! Thank you so much for thinking of me, Your Majesty." Jingyan took out the elixir from the brocade box, spat it out, and a refreshing sensation immediately entered his heart and lungs. "It's very effective! How can I repay this kindness?"
"Hehe, Your Highness, what are you saying? We're like family!" He patted Jingyan's shoulder playfully. "It's my blessing to serve Your Highness, an old man who spends all day holed up in the dilapidated alchemy room!"
"Don't worry, I'll have Father send someone to renovate the alchemy room as soon as possible."
"Oh! How can I possibly accept that!"
"It's nothing, nothing at all! Goodbye!"
After bidding farewell to the Supreme Lord Laozi, Jingyan quickened his pace and arrived at the Jinyin Palace, gently knocking on the door knocker.
"It's you again!" Yang Jian opened the door, immediately frowned, but didn't want to slam the door shut, thinking that he had already given up.
"Jian, long time no see, I missed you so much."
"It's only been a day, I wouldn't have thought of anything. What are you up to now? Haven't you bullied 'my' Xiaotian enough?" Yang Jian glared at him.
"How could I bully it? It's so cute, I love it more than enough." Jingyan said insincerely, "I came to apologize for what happened before, and I even prepared a gift for it!" He immediately pulled out a dog collar.
"Ah! So beautiful!" Yang Jian took it, admiring it in surprise, revealing a charming smile without realizing it, "Xiaotian will look so beautiful wearing it, thank you!"
"N-nothing!" You're the one who's beautiful! Jingyan almost drooled.
"Hey, come in quickly, let's give Xiaotian a surprise."
It seemed Yu Chen's idea was pretty good, Jingyan followed the beaming Yang Jian into the hall.
"Xiaotian, come here!"
"Woof! Woof!" Xiaotian wagged its tail and ran to its master's feet, rubbing against him obsequiously.
"That stinky dog, how dare it take advantage of my adorable Yang Jian!" Jingyan clenched his fist inwardly.
"Xiaotian! Let me get you a new collar." Yang Jian squatted down, removed the old one, and put on the new one. "Xiaotian is so majestic, Xiaotian is so cute, Xiaotian, I love you to death!"
Saying this, Yang Jian hugged Xiaotian, showering its face with countless kisses.
Ugh… I'm so envious, so jealous of that dog! Jingyan almost shed tears of joy.
After hugging and kissing enough, Yang Jian finally remembered there was a living person standing beside him. "Sorry, I forgot to entertain you. I was so focused on Xiaotian that I completely ignored everything around me." Two blushes rose on his handsome face.
"It's alright." So cute, I want to pounce on it, take a bite, and kiss it sweetly! (Qingxuan: I wish I could too!)
"Please sit down! I'll make you some tea."
Jingyan chuckled foolishly, watching Yang Jian's busy back. It really resembled a beautiful and gentle wife taking care of household chores for her husband. Of course, it would be even more so if that dead dog, like a fly, fawning over Yang Jian were removed. I wish this moment could last forever.
Chapter Two:
Chunhui Palace
"Your Highness is quite pleased with yourself!" Princess Yuchenguang said indifferently.
Still immersed in the joy of being accepted by Yang Jian, Jingyan grinned foolishly without realizing it, and of course, he didn't hear anything.
"Your Highness! I'm talking to you!"
"Ah? Princess Yuchenguang, you've come?" "
I've been here for a while. I'm asking you, wasn't my idea good?" She was as proud as a little peacock.
"It's alright!" Jingyan stopped her silly grin. "Yang Jian smiled at me and even invited me for tea. But, the thought that it's all thanks to the dog collar makes me feel uneasy."
"Yang Jian's feelings for you are just a case of loving the dog because of the collar, hehe!" She chuckled strangely. "Anyway, you can transform into seventy-two things, so why don't you become a dog? Maybe then he'll take you seriously!"
"Princess!" This idea was even worse than giving him a dog collar. Jingyan couldn't imagine herself wagging her tail, sticking out her tongue, and competing for favor with the Celestial Hound.
"No—no—! Your Highness, something
bad has happened!" Shi Yan scrambled in, looking as anxious as if the sky were about to fall. "Watch your mouth! What's wrong with me!" Jingyan, still annoyed, roared at Shi Yan.
"Howl, howl, howl..." Unable to catch her breath, Shi Yan stammered.
"What are you laughing at?"
"Eight, eight..."
"Want me to skin you alive?"
Shi Yan shook his head frantically, took three deep breaths, and said, "Today's latest gossip: Lord Yang Jian..."
"I know, he accepted me, which surprised everyone, right!" Ha! Ha! Jing Yan enjoyed the thrill of winning after repeated defeats.
"No!" Shi Yan waved his hand, "It was his celestial dog, Xiaotian, who went behind its master's back to pick up girls and got one pregnant. She's almost due."
"Ah!" Jing Yan and Princess Yu Chen were both shocked and asked at the same time, "Which lady?"
"Ninth Prince! Princess! Xiaotian is a dog! How could it go and seduce 'women'? The one who got pregnant is Eighth Prince Jing Luo's pet—the golden retriever Beibei!" They actually thought it could have relations with people. It seems that the master and Princess Yaochi have something wrong with their brains.
"A perfect opportunity!" Yu Chen slammed her hand on the table. "Xiaotian is eating roadside weeds, Yang Jian must be heartbroken and feeling empty inside. Go comfort him now, and you'll easily win him over."
"Great minds think alike, hahaha! Shi Yan, guard the house, I'm off!"
Ningyin Palace (Eighth Prince Jingluo's residence)
"I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry, Your Highness Jingluo!" Yang Jian knelt down, Xiaotian beside him drooping its head in dejection.
"Don't be like that, Jian!" Jingluo was extremely nervous. "You didn't do anything wrong, you don't need to apologize."
"I was wrong, I didn't discipline Xiaotian properly, I made it, I made it become a big lewd dog, defiling Beibei, I, I..." He was speechless for a moment, and his large eyes slid down.
"Woo-woo-woo-woo!" Xiaotian whimpered mournfully.
"Don't cry! Jian, I beg you, we can talk this over!" Jingluo pulled him up, wiping away his tears with her sleeve. "We're good friends, I won't blame you no matter what happens."
"Jingluo," Jian sobbed, clutching her sleeve, "I'll make Xiaotian take responsibility, I'll definitely marry Beibei properly into the Yang family."
"Woof!" Xiaotian excitedly looked up, meeting his master's red eyes, then lowered his head in shame.
"Uh, then I'll thank you for your kindness on Beibei's behalf."
"I...can I see Beibei?"
"Of course, come with me!"
The two people and the dog entered the inner room. The golden retriever Beibei, with a big, round belly, lay in its fragrant bed.
"Woof woof!" Xiaotian ran to its side, sniffing and licking it.
"Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof!" Beibei nuzzled her future husband gracefully.
A deep affection flowed between the two dogs.
Yang Jian felt dizzy and swayed, grabbing the wall to keep from falling.
"Jian! Are you alright? Your face is so pale."
"I...I'm fine, nothing...I'm fine..."
"Jian..."
"I—I..." Yang Jian fled Ningyin Palace as if his life depended on it. Disappointment, sadness, pain, and jealousy surged within him, turning into hot tears that streamed down his face, blinding him as he buried his face in a warm embrace.
"Oh! Jian, what's wrong?" Jingyan stumbled back three steps before regaining his balance.
"Who are you? Oh, Ninth Prince, I'm sorry, I didn't see you." He quickly wiped away his tears with his sleeve.
"It's alright. Jian, why are you crying? Is it because of Xiaotian Dog?" Jingyan asked cautiously, "It's not worth your tears!" It certainly doesn't deserve Jian's boundless affection.
"I hate myself so much. Why am I not one of Xiaotian's kind? If I were, Xiaotian would definitely fall in love with me; if I were, Beibei would never have a chance to get Xiaotian... But I'm not. My one-sided love will only make Xiaotian feel sad. I can only bless them like their master. I don't want that! I'm so jealous, I'm in so much pain, I'm going crazy!" Yang Jian pulled at his hair and shook his head desperately.
"Jian! Jian! Calm down! Xiaotian doesn't love you, but I do!" He grabbed him and hugged him tightly, as if trying to convey all his love to him.
"I only want Xiaotian! I only want Xiaotian, let me go!" Yang Jian pushed Jingyan away with all his might. "I hate you! You're so awful! You'd better disappear from my sight forever!" He activated a spell and vanished in an instant.
"Jian!" Jingyan stretched his hand out into the empty air, stunned.
Why? He just wanted to comfort him, just wanted to tell him that it didn't matter without Xiaotian, there was still someone who loved him deeply.
"Jian! It hurts!" He pressed his hand to his chest, unable to suppress the throbbing pain. He crouched down, "Jian, don't hate me, don't... Waaah..."
A tearing pain overwhelmed his consciousness.
"...Jian..."
Hiding high in the tree branch, Yang Jian let his emotions run wild, crying for a long, long time. Slowly, he calmed down.
Although the grief still lingered in his chest, it seemed to have been washed away by his tears, no longer so unbearable.
He knew there was no future with Xiaotian, yet he refused to face this reality, indulging in his stubbornness. Today's outcome was the retribution for his stubbornness. It was time to wake up, to leave this false dream, to let go. Xiaotian deserved his own happiness.
"It seems... I went too far." He sighed, the image of Jingyan deeply hurt by his words flashing through his mind. "He just wanted to comfort me, but he ended up like this. He has to apologize!"
He lightly leaped from the branch back to the ground. "After apologizing, I'll go back to Master. Seclusion and cultivation will help me forget all this unhappiness."
With these thoughts, he moved like a swallow, leaping and bounding towards the place where he had just met Jingyan.
For some reason, he had a hunch that Jingyan, whom he had scolded so harshly, was still there.
Huh! No, his intuition was wrong.
That's true, no one would stay there any longer; it's not like they're asking for trouble. Just as he turned to leave, he heard the rustling of tree ferns in the grass.
He turned back and saw a small, black-furred creature curled up there, shivering as if from the cold.
Sensing someone approaching, it raised its small head, its large, dark eyes wide open.
"Xiaotian!" Yang Jian exclaimed, picking it up. "No, you're not. You look so small. Xiaotian is already an adult. But you really look exactly like it when it was little."
"Woof-woof—! Woof-woof—!" The little black dog waved its limbs, as if trying to express something, something urgently welling up in its moist eyes.
"Are you cold? Don't be afraid!" He unbuttoned his shirt, revealing his smooth, white chest, and placed the little black dog against his chest, covering it with his clothes to warm it with his own body heat.
After a moment of stunned silence, the little black dog adjusted its position and closed its eyes to rest.
"I'll apologize another time!"
Chapter Three.
How should I put this? There seems to be a proverb among humans: Every cloud has a silver lining.
Jingyan openly admired Yang Jian's slightly melancholy sleeping face, and this thought popped into his mind.
That day, Yang Jian angrily disappeared in front of him, and he fainted from heartbreak, thinking that Yang Jian's words had come true and he would really disappear from this world!
He woke up to find himself transformed into a little black dog, shivering in the wind, and had to run to the bushes for shelter. His clothes, scattered on the ground, were picked up by a flower fairy.
Just when he thought he was about to become the first prince in Heaven's history to freeze to death in the slight chill of the wind, Jian appeared and found him.
Although he wasn't satisfied with his new appearance (he was nothing like that stupid, smelly dog! He was much more handsome and dashing), he was very fond of Jian's warm chest. That warm feeling, that smooth touch, Jian's unique scent—oh! He couldn't take it anymore, he was going to have a nosebleed! He
covered his nose with his front paws, finally managing to stop the bleeding. (Qingxuan: Don't ask me if dogs get nosebleeds.)
He looked up and stole a glance at Jian, who was so close, from his long, glossy black hair to his slender neck, everything about him was endearing, making him wag his tail excitedly.
He was sleeping soundly now, a kiss wouldn't hurt, right?
Jingyan leaned closer and licked him with his tongue.
No reaction.
He licked boldly, even trying to penetrate Jian's tightly closed lips, knowing he wouldn't wake up.
"Mmm—! Xiaotian, no! Xiaotian—!" he murmured softly in his sleep.
Ah—! Jingyan was struck dumb. So, so that damned dog had already done such a filthy thing to his Jian. That meant Jian's first kiss was gone, but, but it was his first kiss!
"Woof—Woof! Woof woof! Woof—Woof!" Too saddened, Jingyan had to vent—in dog language. (Special service, simultaneous translation in dog language: Howling Celestial Dog, go to hell! Woof--!)
"Hmm? Ah! It's dawn." Yang Jian sat up, and was startled when he saw Jingyan—the little black dog. He immediately remembered, "How did you end up on my bed? Are you hungry? I'll prepare some food for you right away."
He threw off the covers and got out of bed, heading towards the kitchen. The morning sun streamed in through the door and window, shining on him. His thin robe subtly outlined his well-proportioned curves, making the little lecherous dog drool.
"Here, you're still young, eat something liquid first."
Jingyan looked at the plate in front of him. It contained a yellowish, rice-paste-like substance. It didn't smell good, but it wasn't smelly either. He wondered if it tasted bad.
He didn't want to eat it, but when he thought that Yang Jian had "personally" made it for him, he had no choice but to swallow it.
"Is it good?"
"Woof woof!" Thank goodness, it wasn't bad! Jingyan wagged his tail.
"You're so cute." Yang Jian smiled as he looked at Jingyan, who was happily eating, but then his smile faded as if he remembered something.
"Is Your Excellency Yang Jian, the True Lord of Qingyuan Miaodao, here? Yaochi Yuchen has something to discuss." A gentle knock sounded, followed by an elegant female voice.
Huh? What does this woman want with Jian? Jingyan dropped her food and followed Yang Jian to the front door.
Yang Jian opened the door. "Princess Yuchen, hello," he said with a polite smile, "What can I do for you?"
“It’s nothing,” Yu Chen smiled sweetly. “Did Lord Yang Jian see His Highness the Ninth Prince yesterday?”
“He saw him once,” Yang Jian said coldly.
“Then do you know His Highness the Ninth Prince’s whereabouts? He didn’t return to Chunhui Palace last night, and there’s no sign of him anywhere in the Heavenly Palace.”
“I don’t know.”
“Woof!” (I’m here!) Jing Yan stretched out his cute front paws and grabbed at Yu Chen’s white skirt.
“Hey! Where did this little dog come from?” Daring to grab her skirt, he has a death wish! Without thinking, Yu Chen stretched out her slender hand, ready to slap Jing Yan away a hundred and eight thousand miles away.
Fortunately, Yang Jian reacted quickly, catching Jingyan in his arms and saving him from a potentially fatal slap. "Princess Yuchen, I'm so sorry, my Xiaotian has offended you."
"Xiaotian!!" Yuchen's voice suddenly rose, pointing at Jingyan, "Is this Xiaotian? How did it shrink so much?"
"It's not Xiaotian, it's Xiaotian, the 'xiao' of 'howling'." Yang Jian gently stroked Jingyan's small head.
"Woof...woof!" (No!) He didn't want to be called Xiaotian anymore; it felt like he was being used as a substitute for that stupid dog.
"Oh! It's Xiaotian!" Yuchen suddenly realized, "So cute!" She reached out to touch Jingyan's black fur.
"Woof! Woof-woof!!" (Get away, violent woman!) He hadn't forgotten that this was the woman who had almost killed it with her hand just now, and Jingyan had lowered its head, making Yuchen unable to touch itself.
"How unlovable." Yu Chen withdrew her hand. "Since Lord Yang Jian doesn't know, I'll go inquire elsewhere. Farewell."
She bowed gracefully, turned, and drifted away, muttering softly, "Gone, Xiaotian's here, Xiaokai. I think Prince Jingyan has no hope in this life, unless he immediately enters the dog's cycle of reincarnation, then there'll be a tiny sliver of hope."
Though her voice was soft, it still reached Jingyan's perked-up ears.
This woman! Always undermining his prestige and boosting the dog's morale! She actually said he had no hope, humph! Once he recovers, the first thing he'll do is beat her up, beat her into a pig's head, so she'll never be able to get married again.
"Jian—!" Jing Luo rushed over, arriving before Yang Jian closed the door. "Jian!"
"...Your Highness Jing Luo." Yang Jian lowered his head; he didn't want to see anyone related to Xiaotian Dog right now.
"Jian, are you alright?" Jingluo asked with concern. "Xiaotian was worried about you, but he was afraid you'd be upset to see him, so he sent me to check on you in his place."
"...Thank you, thank you. I'm fine. Um, please...please don't worry about me, Xiaotian."
Held in Jingyan's arms, Jingyan could clearly feel Yang Jian trembling, a very weak, sorrowful trembling.
If...if he weren't a puppy right now, he would definitely hold Jian close, kiss him fiercely, and make him forget his sorrow.
"Jian..."
"I'm really alright."
"Alright." Jingluo sighed. "If you're sad, don't forget me, your friend. My chest is always there for you to lean on."
"I won't forget." Yang Jian forced a smile.
Huh—? Could it be that besides Xiaotian, he has a hidden rival in love? Jingyan glared at Jingluo with high vigilance. So that bastard Eighth Prince also had designs on "his" Jian Feng! How could this be? Jian is his; no one can take him away!
It's decided, he'll stay in puppy form, always by Jian's side, keeping out any lecherous wolves!
Chapter Four:
Jingyan stands in front of the mirror, striking poses—ah, correction, it should be grooming his fur.
He licks his black fur until it's as smooth as black silk, making it look incredibly cute and noble. Because—it's going to visit Jian's master!
The beautiful and charming Jian has been separated from humanity and entered the tutelage of the Jade Cauldron Immortal in the Golden Cloud Cave of Jade Cauldron Mountain for over a thousand years. His relatives in the mortal world have long since disappeared, and the only immortal he is close to in the celestial realm is his master, the Jade Cauldron Immortal, who is like a father to him.
In order to successfully marry Jian in the future, it must flatter this future "father-in-law"!
"Xiaotian, are you done?" Yang Jian leans against the door, smiling as he watches the little black dog diligently grooming itself.
"Woof woof!" (Alright, alright!) Jingyan wagged its tail and jumped to Yang Jian's feet, nuzzling him affectionately. "Woof woof—! Woof woof!" (Hug me, Jian!)
"Little guy, you're all dressed up so nicely, are you trying to seduce a female dog?" The smile in his tone suddenly faded, replaced by a touch of sadness. "Xiaotian is the same way, he always spends a long time getting ready before going to see Beibei." And he had been so careless as to not realize what its actions meant.
Yang Jian gently took Jingyan into his arms.
"Woof...woof..." (Jian, don't be sad, I'm not Xiaotian, you're the only one in my heart. He cursed Xiaotian Dog to the core once more, and also wished that all its babies would be born without an anus. (Xiao Xuan: You, you're so vicious!)
"...Let's go!"
Yang Jian murmured a spell, and a snow-white cloud flew in front of him.
Stepping onto the cloud, he flew like an arrow, tracing a graceful arc across the sky, heading towards Jade Cauldron Mountain.
Jian stood upright in the wind, his slender body stiff, his robes fluttering wildly beside him, a faint sadness etched between his brows—a beauty even Chang'e of the Moon Palace couldn't match—truly breathtaking, Jingyan secretly drooled.
In the blink of an eye, Yang Jian had landed steadily on the platform atop Jade Cauldron Mountain.
"Jian, welcome back!" A deep, middle-aged male voice came from behind him.
"Master!" Yang Jian put Yingyan down and immediately threw himself into her arms. "Master, I missed you so much!"
Wow! Jingyan looked at Yu Ding Zhenren with his bright, starry eyes. He truly was Jian's master—a handsome man indeed! Unlike Jian's porcelain doll-like appearance, he possessed a mature and alluring sexiness, the perfect choice for female fantasies. No wonder he resolutely left the Immortal Realm to cultivate in the mortal world; he definitely couldn't stand the sexual harassment from those fairies.
But—old man! Have you hugged enough? A master should act like a master, not be so groping your disciple!
"Hmm... Jian, what's this?" Yu Ding Zhenren looked bewildered, pointing to the dog at his feet that was desperately tugging at his robe.
"Ah, Xiaotian! Don't be so presumptuous!" Yang Jian gently patted Jingyan's head, making it release its grip.
"Ouch..." (Ouch...) Jingyan, with his watery eyes, threw himself into Jian's arms.
"It is..."
“It’s Xiaotian, the Xiao of howling. I found it yesterday. It probably doesn’t have an owner, so I want to adopt it.”
“Xiaotian?… Hmm, with proper training, it should be able to replace Xiaotian Dog as your mount, although Xiaotian isn’t old enough to retire yet.” Master Yuding patted Jingyan amicably.
“Woof! Woof! Woof──!” (Hey, do you think you can just touch my head like that? Get lost!) Jingyan barked and bared his teeth at Master Yuding.
“Xiaotian! Don’t be rude!”
“Woof…woof…” (Okay…) Jingyan shut his mouth in grievance, retracting his sharp canine teeth.
“By the way, you’re back just in time. I have someone to introduce to you.” Master Yuding smiled as he watched his disciple train the dog.
“Who?”
“It’s…”
“Master──!” A dark shadow grew larger and larger, approaching from afar, and instantly landed in front of Master Yuding. “What did you call me back for?”
"Your master is back. Let me introduce you," Master Yu Ding turned to Yang Jian. "Jian, this is Shui Wu, my disciple whom I recently took on."
"Hello." Yang Jian's smile was polite but tinged with coldness, showing his lack of interest in his newly arrived junior brother.
"Greetings, Senior Brother!" Shui Wu's eyes lit up. "I've wanted to see you for so long!"
Those shining eyes, that excited emotion—no doubt, this was a classic sign of love at first sight. Jing Yan immediately glared at Shui Wu with a fierce look. How dare he covet his precious Jian! Kid, you don't want to live anymore!
"...Master, I'm tired. I want to rest for a bit." Compared to Shui Wu's enthusiasm, Yang Jian's attitude could only be described as icy.
"Go back to your room and rest. Shui Wu will continue his cultivation."
"Ah? No, I've only just spoken a few words to Senior Brother!"
"Trying to disobey your master's orders?" Master Yu Ding narrowed his eyes.
"Alright, I'll obey." Shui Wu sighed and flew towards the training ground.
Yang Jian returned to his private room, which was spotless and awaited his arrival because it was regularly cleaned.
Yang Jian sat on the bed. "Xiao Tian, come here."
Jing Yan, who was wandering around Jian's boudoir, immediately ran over, jumped onto the bed, and sat down next to Jian.
"Would you like to be my mount? The training is very strict, so you can shake your head and refuse."
How to put it? As a prince, he certainly didn't want to lower himself to become someone else's mount. (Little Xuanxuan: It's a spirit beast, what "mount"? It's easy to get the wrong idea!) But when he thought of Jian's slender body sitting on him, his smooth and bouncy buttocks pressed against his back, all his reluctance vanished.
So, Jing Yan, imagining a beautiful future life in his mind, nodded repeatedly.
"...Before, when I wasn't an immortal," Yang Jian's voice wavered, "Xiaotian accompanied me in my cultivation. No matter how bitter or tiring it was, it always looked at me with gentle eyes, silently supporting me."
Jian... Jingyan was so jealous. Why didn't he meet Jian sooner? Let that rotten dog Xiaotian get there first.
"It stayed in my arms with me through countless dark nights, and now... I've gotten used to its companionship, but it will never be with me again." Crystalline tears silently gathered, overflowing from his eyes and sliding down Bai Xi's cheeks.
"Waaah..." (Jian...!) Don't be sad for it anymore. Look at me, I love you so much! Why can't you feel it? Jingyan almost cried too.
"If, if I also got used to your companionship, and you met a female dog you liked, would you leave me like Xiaotian did?"
"Woof! Woof woof!" (No! Absolutely not!) Jingyan shook his head like a rattle-drum.
"...Thank you, Xiaotian!"
Chapter Five.
He—Jingyan, the ninth prince of the Jade Emperor, possessed unparalleled magical power from birth. His effortless cultivation granted him magical abilities far beyond the reach of ordinary immortals, so he had no idea what hardship was, nor had he ever had the chance to learn. However, things are always unpredictable—
under the careful guidance of Master Yuding, Jingyan had been undergoing arduous training for three days.
"Hey, you're dead after only a hundred jumps? You're useless!" Master Yuding lightly kicked Jingyan, who was lying on the ground pretending to be dead.
"Ugh..." (Bastard...) Jingyan curled up, refusing to stand up.
"Alas—!" Master Yuding sighed deeply. "You're truly useless. Back in the day, Xiaotian could jump five hundred times in one go. A divine dog is a divine dog after all; you, a mongrel, can't compare."
"Woof! Woof! Woof woof woof woof!" (Pah! Don't compare me to a dog!) Gritting his teeth, Jingyan shakily stood up, staring at the obstacle in front of him—a hundred long benches lined up in neat rows.
Deep breath, another deep breath, okay, jump!
What that dead dog Xiaotian could do, he could do too, and he would do it better!!
"Hmm—! This little dog is teachable!" Master Yuding leaped and sat cross-legged on a boulder, enjoying the cool breeze while watching the dog jump around.
One hour, two hours, three hours…
The moon climbed to the treetops, and the stars winked mischievously.
Finally, after five hundred jumps, Jingyan swayed like a drunkard, finally collapsing to the ground, his little tongue lolling out, panting heavily.
When he finally rested and stood up, the moon was already high in the night sky.
"Woof..." (Old man...) Jingyan looked at the boulder and saw that the Jade Cauldron Immortal was solemn, eyes closed, breathing evenly—he was asleep.
…He really wanted to jump up and bite him hard, but…he simply didn't have the strength.
Jingyan whimpered and walked towards the mountainside, where there was a small waterfall. He wanted to wash himself clean, then climb into Jian's arms and let Jian gently massage him.
There was a small waterfall on the eastern side of Jade Cauldron Mountain, and the rushing water was said to purify the soul.
Whether it could purify the soul, Jingyan didn't know, but the clear water could definitely wash away the dust and mud on his body.
Stumbling to the water's edge, Jingyan plunged in and didn't surface for a long time.
What a close call! He almost drowned while asleep. He climbed ashore, shook off the water, and was about to head towards Jian's boudoir when he caught a glimpse of someone out of the corner of his eye—a person sitting cross-legged amidst the rushing current.
Who is it? Engaging in this wet practice in the middle of the night? Wait… it's Jian! It
really is Jian! Jingyan's eyes widened. His Jian looked even more radiant in the splashing water, his white Taoist robe soaked through, almost transparent, clinging tightly to his delicate skin, outlining Jian's alluring curves.
Really, really… so cute!!! I want to pounce on him and devour him! Oh… if only he weren't in dog form right now!
Jingyan tucked his tail between his legs and spun rapidly in place, partly out of annoyance with his current body, and partly, of course, due to the shameless lust that was spreading rapidly within him.
He spun and spun until he was dizzy.
He decided that he would go over and pretend to be cute to secretly take advantage of Jian's tender tofu to satisfy his craving, otherwise he would definitely be too depressed to sleep tonight.
Jian—! Here I come! Ouch!
He had just taken a mischievous step when, unfortunately, someone grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and lifted him off the ground.
"Woof! Woof woof...woof!" (Who? Put me down...hey!) Struggling wildly, Jingyan was surprised to find that the person who ruined his happy life was actually Shui Wu—this Shui Wu who was supposed to be in seclusion for half a year!
Shui Wu carried Jingyan to a secluded grove and threw him into the bushes.
"Ouch—! Woof! Woof woof woof! Woof!" (Ouch—! You bastard! You sneaky idiot who dared to abandon me, I'll bite you to death!) Jingyan, wincing in pain, scrambled to his feet and assumed a fighting stance against Shuiwu.
"Xiaotian!" Shuiwu suddenly crouched down, looking into Jingyan's fiercely protective eyes. "You're in heat!"
"Ouch…" (Ah…) How did he know?
"Just smell it. You exude a rich, sweet scent of desire, even in my seclusion I can smell it clearly."
What was he trying to do? Looking at the face that suddenly approached, Jingyan unconsciously took two or three steps back, sensing impending danger.
"Let me help you satisfy your needs!" Smiling, Shuiwu grabbed Jingyan's slender neck.
"Woof—!" (Don't even think about it—!) Is this guy kidding me? He's a dog now, and he actually wants to... How disgusting, get away!!!
"What are you afraid of? We're the same kind anyway!"
Huh?
"Can't you tell? You're adorably stupid!" As he spoke, Mizuki emitted a gentle golden light, slowly lowering his body.
When the golden light dissipated, Mizuki had transformed into a large, strong dog, his clothes scattered around him.
"Woof? Woof? Woof woof...?" (Are you a dog demon? Why do you have a fox face? And a fox tail too...?) Is he a dog demon or a fox spirit?
"Woof! Woof woof woof... woof!" (I'm a fox-dog, my dad's a dog demon, and my mom's a fox spirit.) Shui Wu said smugly, pointing to his chest, "Woof woof... woof woof!" (Come on, little cutie! I'll use the fox clan's most mysterious man-taming technique to make you feel like you're dying of pleasure, hehehehe...!)
"Woof—woof woof! Woof...!" (No! Get away! Help!)
Jing Yan struggled desperately, but unfortunately, he was too small (about the size of a cat), while the other party was a tall and strong adult fox-dog. In addition, he had over-exercised today, and all his muscles were out of control, so he was easily pinned down by Shui Wu.
"Woof... woof..." (No, no! Let me go!) Jing Yan twisted his body helplessly, but he couldn't break free from the guy on top of him. He was truly on the verge of tears!
"Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof!" (Little cutie, relax, I'll make you happy, because you're the one I fell in love with at first sight!)
"Woof?" (Huh?) Could it be that his reaction that day was because of me? Jingyan couldn't help but beam with joy. So he wasn't spying on Jian! Great! One less rival!
"Woof! Woof—!" (Looks like you love me too, little cutie. Look how happy you are! Let's do it! After we're done, I'll marry you right away!) Shuiwu pressed down on Jingyan's thin shoulders, his erection searching for the secret spot.
"Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof!" (I'm male! If you want to... go find a female dog!) Jingyan made a last-ditch effort.
"Woof! Woof…" (Little cutie, I, Shuiwu, only love male dogs, not female dogs, hehe, here I come!)
Oh no, my chastity is going to be in danger!
"What are you going to do to my Xiaotian?" A sharp, clear roar rang out, and a strange gust of wind blew Shui Wu several feet away, while Jingyan beneath him remained completely unharmed.
"Woof...woof woof—!" (Jian...Jian ah!!!) Jingyan, with tears of excitement in his eyes, rushed into the arms of Yang Jian, who had just arrived to save him from being violated.
Thank goodness, his chastity was preserved! He hadn't lost face as a member of the royal family! Jingyan could no longer hold back his tears, which streamed down his face.
Chapter Six
"Ah—sneeze!" "Ah—sneeze!"
Ever since the attempted rape by the lecherous Shui Wu, Prince Jingyan—who had never been sick and had been hailed as the healthiest immortal baby in the celestial realm since childhood—now, as the little black dog Xiaotian, unfortunately developed a high fever and caught a cold, spending half a month bedridden, feeling dizzy and sneezing constantly every day.
What utter misfortune! The only thing that brought him happiness amidst this misfortune was that the bastard Shui Wu was locked in a cave by the Jade Cauldron Immortal, forbidden to come out unless he could rid himself of his lustful (or rather, perverted) desires.
Abstain from lust? Hmph! Could that bastard possibly do it? Ah! Perhaps only when he's too old to act will he be forced to suppress his lustful thoughts! Jingyan thought mischievously.
"Xiaotian, come drink your medicine!" Yang Jian pushed open the door.
"Woof!" (Jian! My Jian! Beautiful Jian! I love you to death!) It dragged its sickly body over.
"Good boy, I know this doesn't taste very good, but please finish it." Yang Jian said tenderly.
"Woof! Woof!" (I'll finish it, Jian, don't worry!) This was brewed for him by Jian himself; even if it contained ten catties of bitter herbs, he would drink it all like honey.
Yang Jian watched with satisfaction as Xiaotian frowned, yet drank the bitter medicine without hesitation. Unconsciously, he began comparing Xiaotian to Xiaotian again.
They had many similarities: obedient, well-behaved, and loyal. But Xiaotian was good at being affectionate, liked to cling to him all day, and always fulfilled his requests with great enthusiasm. Xiaotian wasn't like that. Xiaotian…
Suddenly, the sound of flapping wings interrupted his thoughts.
A snow-white carrier pigeon flew into the room, instantly transforming into a handsome young man.
"Greetings, Qingyuan Miaodao Zhijun!" The young man bowed to Yang Jian. "I am here on my master's orders to invite you... to attend Xiaotian and Beibei's wedding."
"..." Yang Jian trembled slightly, trying to keep his voice from betraying his feelings. "When?"
"...Today."
"...Today?"
"Uh, yes." The young man became uneasy. "If, if you have something to do and can't make it, you don't need to go. My master will arrange everything."
"...Your Highness Jingluo is truly thoughtful." Knowing that attending would break his spirit, he delayed in informing him until now, giving him an excuse not to go. But... "I will go."
"My lord..."
"What must be faced must be faced." He gave a poignant smile.
"...Yes, the wedding will be held in my master's Ningyin Palace. I will take my leave."
The young man transformed again, flapping his wings and flying away.
Yang Jian turned around, but stopped after taking only one step. "Xiaotian?"
Jingyan tugged at his sleeve, looking at him pitifully with his big, watery eyes, as if saying: Don't go, don't go!
"Xiaotian!" His tone became slightly stern.
"Woof—!" (Jian woof—!) Jingyan had no choice but to give in, lying down dejectedly.
Don't go! Jian! Jingyan whimpered. He hadn't won Jian's heart yet, and if Jian were to see Xiaotian now, it would be too dangerous. Perhaps a shocking "handsome young man snatching a dog groom" incident would unfold.
He didn't want to! He didn't want to! He didn't want to woof—!
"Xiaotian, you're sick, you should rest."
"Woof woof…" (Jian, I…I don't want to…)
"You!" Yang Jian helplessly picked up the stubborn little black dog who was staring at him. "Then let's go together!"
Hmm—! Alright, with him by Jian's side, there's no chance Xiaotianquan will have the chance to break off the engagement and return to Jian's side.
So, Jingyan comfortably lay in his beloved's arms and went to attend the dog's wedding.
The Eighth Prince Jingluo's residence—Ningyin Palace—was bustling with activity, and congratulations could be heard everywhere.
"Qingqingqingqingqingqingyuanmiaodao Zhenjun has arrived!" The guarding heavenly soldier announced in a trembling voice, instantly silencing the entire Ningyin Palace.
Under the astonished gazes of everyone, Yang Jian walked step by step towards the dog groom sitting in the center, with a small black dog—Jingyan—frantically shuffling along at his feet.
"Ah, Jian, you're here!" Jingluo cleverly blocked his way, "Today is Xiaotianquan and Beibei's big day, we must have a good drink!" Saying that, she tried to pull Yang Jian aside to pour him some wine.
“Your Highness Jingluo,” he politely pushed the other’s hand away, “I will not do anything to disrupt Xiaotian’s wedding. Please allow me to speak with Xiaotian for a few minutes. Please, for the sake of our past relationship as master and servant…”
"Uh, of course." Even though this was his territory, he had no reason to stop them from meeting. At Yang Jian's pleading, Jing Luo blushed and backed away.
"Thank you!" Yang Jian walked up to Xiaotian and squatted down.
"Woof!" (Useless, stinky brother!) Jing Yan growled at Jing Luo, immediately running to Yang Jian's side and quickly going into battle mode.
Hmph! Xiaotian, you stinky dog, if you dare to molest my Jian, I'll bite you to death on the spot! It grinned, revealing its healthy, white fangs.
"Xiaotian, I've come to bless you," Yang Jian said with a touch of sadness. "You've found a partner you can love wholeheartedly, you'll have the baby you've longed for, you've embarked on the road to happiness, I bless you!"
"Woof..." (Master...) Xiaotian was moved to tears, rubbing its large head against Yang Jian's chest.
"Woof!" (You damn dog!) Don't you dare take advantage of my Jian! Jing Yan jumped up and down in anger.
“Beibei,” Yang Jian turned to the pregnant golden retriever next to Xiaotianquan, “I’m entrusting Xiaotianquan to you from now on.”
Beibei, the golden retriever, nodded obediently.
“Jian…” Jingluo leaned closer.
“Let’s go have a drink. I need to drink properly today.” Yang Jian stood up and walked towards the banquet not far away.
“Ah, okay, okay!” Jingluo immediately followed.
“Woof woof!” (Hey, little guy!) Xiaotianquan called to stop Jingyan, who was about to chase after him.
Hmph, what? Jingyan glared at his rival with extreme hostility.
“Woof woof, woof…” (Master will be in your care from now on. Master isn’t someone who can take care of himself…) Xiaotianquan said earnestly.
"Woof!" (I'll do it even without you saying it!)
"Woof woof..." (That's good, that's good...)
Jingyan, who had turned and taken two steps, looked back at the suddenly silent Xiaotian Dog and blurted out, "Woof woof woof?" (If you're so reluctant to part with Jian, why did you marry another dog? Don't you know how much Jian loves you?)
Xiaotian Dog became even more silent.
Realizing that the golden retriever Beibei was watching him, Jingyan realized he shouldn't have upset the pregnant woman and quickly tried to salvage the situation, "Woof woof, woof!" (Never mind, never mind!)
"Woof woof—woof woof," (I know, I know everything, but—humans and dogs are different, and besides, Master... how should I put it,) Xiaotian Dog peeked at the bride Beibei, "Woof, woof, woof woof woof... woof." (From a canine perspective, Master is really, really, really ugly!)
Uh, wait, did he hear wrong? He had just heard a dog say that his Jian was ugly—a hallucination, a hallucination, it must be a side effect of transforming into a dog.
"Woof! Woof...woof...woof woof!" (He's really ugly! He doesn't have soft fur, his ears aren't pointed and erect, he's only a tiny little thing, and most importantly...master...master doesn't have a beautifully curved tail!)
This...this...this is what they call judging people by their own standards, it's unbelievable that such a beautiful Jian was found to have so many flaws.
"Woof! Woof..." (Beibei is much prettier, she's the number one beauty in our dog clan, I'm so lucky to have married her...) Xiaotian gazed affectionately at the golden retriever.
The golden retriever returned the gaze with equal affection.
Shaking off the goosebumps that had suddenly appeared on his skin, Jingyan pounced.
"Oh no! It's terrible, the dogs are fighting!"
"Quick, someone pull them apart! How can such a rare wedding be in such chaos!"
"First it was Lord Yang Jian, now it's a little black dog, is this marriage cursed?"
The numerous immortals were in complete disarray.
*Ptooey! Ptooey!*
Jingyan spat out a few dog hairs, taking unsteady steps, indicating that it hadn't fared much better in the dog fight.
Although it had been kicked a few times by the Howling Celestial Hound, the thought of how it had bitten the dog bald patches made its anger subside, and it felt its injuries were worthwhile. But
where was Jian?
Jingyan searched high and low, and after a long time, finally found the missing Yang Jian under a large tree in the quieter back garden of Ningyin Palace.
"Woof! Woof..." (Jian! I taught that blind dog a lesson for you...) Wagging its tail, it ran towards him.
Wow! The strong smell of alcohol was overwhelming; it seemed Yang Jian had drunk quite a bit. A slightly tipsy Jingyan, intoxicated by the fumes, sat obediently beside Yang Jian.
"Xiaotian! Xiaotian! Waaah—!" Yang Jian suddenly hugged Jingyan, bursting into tears, disregarding his image.
For the first time, Jingyan, mistaken for that stinky dog, didn't resist, letting Yang Jian hold him tightly, even if it hurt.
Cry, cry your heart out! Jingyan silently told himself, letting out all his resentment, all his grievances, all his love for Xiaotian. This wasn't shameful. After you've cried it out, please be strong, forget the past, cherish the present, and keep the one who truly loves you in your heart! After
crying for a long time, exhausted, Yang Jian fell into a deep sleep on the grass, while Jingyan, having inhaled too much alcohol, also fell asleep.
The three men quietly approached the sleeping man and dog.
"Is this really alright?" The first to speak was the current Jade Emperor, the father of Jingyan and Jingluo.
"Of course," came the mature and handsome Jade Cauldron Immortal, "Everyone needs to experience a deeply unforgettable love to mature. Jian is going to undergo this trial."
Jade Cauldron Immortal squatted down and wiped away the remaining tear stains on Yang Jian's face with his sleeve. "I'm glad he cried. The fact that he can cry means he can start a new relationship in the future. Although Xiaotian Dog will forever leave a lingering image in his heart, but—that's how most first loves end."
"You sound just like a father," the Jade Emperor remarked in surprise. You see, in the celestial realm, Jade Cauldron Immortal was a famously cold and handsome man, quite unlike the image of a doting father.
"Except for blood ties, Jian is simply my child."
What a great father! The Jade Emperor made a face in his mind. Hmph! I'm going to hold a contest to determine the most doting father in the celestial realm, and I'll embarrass you!
"Hmm...that's fine too." The Supreme Lord Laozi, who had remained silent until now, muttered to himself, "This way Lord Jian won't want that thing anymore, right? Good, good! I'm really embarrassed to tell him I lost it..."
"Laozi, what are you muttering about?" the Jade Emperor asked.
"Heh...nothing, nothing, it's a common ailment of the elderly, always liking to talk to themselves for no reason, don't mind it!"
Yu Ding Zhenren softly chanted a spell, shrinking Yang Jian and Jing Yan and putting them into his arms. "I'll take Jian back to Yu Ding Mountain, farewell."
He flew away from the celestial realm on a whirlwind, occasionally hearing the excited screams of fairies he encountered along the way, clearly revealing the reason why Yu Ding Zhenren resolutely settled in the mortal realm and refused to return to the celestial realm.
"Now is a good opportunity to take advantage of the situation, where has that rascal Yan gone to hide?" the Jade Emperor said regretfully.
Chapter Seven
: As the saying goes: Life lies in movement.
After his fierce battle with the Celestial Hound, Jingyan's long-standing ailment—a cold—was miraculously cured without any medicine!
But that wasn't the most gratifying thing. What excited him the most was that after experiencing his first love's wedding, he didn't lose his composure. Although he would sometimes space out and think about his own thoughts, most of the time he wore a warm and gentle smile, like the spring sunshine.
Clearly, this was his golden opportunity—a perfect chance to take advantage of his proximity. He had to work hard and quickly capture Yang Jian's heart.
That day, Jingyan accompanied Yang Jian to a pavilion halfway up the mountain for tea.
To be precise, only Yang Jian was enjoying the tea; the little black dog Jingyan had no interest in the bitter stuff. It jumped onto the stone table, wagging its tail and striking various poses that it considered elegant and alluring.
Yang Jian almost spat out the tea he was holding.
"Xiaotian, what are you doing?" He reached out and affectionately patted the dog's head.
"Woof!" (Jian!) You're so annoying! I'm trying so hard to seduce you! How can you not see that? Jingyan nestled somewhat dejectedly into Yang Jian's arms.
"Are you being naughty? Or is it..." Yang Jian stared at Xiaotian, who had suddenly lost its spirit.
Judging by Xiaotian's size, it's still small and wouldn't be in heat. But judging from its behavior just now, it looks exactly like a male dog in heat trying to attract a female. How strange!
And there aren't any female dogs around here. Who is it showing off to? It's so strange.
Could it be that it's practicing? So that when it encounters a female dog it likes in the future, it won't be at a loss and heartbroken?
Hmm, that's very likely.
A dog's heart is like a needle at the bottom of the sea, unfathomable. Yang Jian smiled and gently stroked Jingyan's back.
Suddenly, as if sensing some danger, he picked up Jingyan, nimbly flipped over, and leaped out of the pavilion, floating into the air.
The once elegant pavilion collapsed completely in the next second.
Staring at the rubble at his feet, Jingyan was so shocked that his mouth opened wide, unable to utter a single bark.
If, if it hadn't been pulled away by Yang Jian in time, it would definitely be a dog meat pie by now, its dog life ending in a muddle.
Who wanted to kill it so pathetically? When did it make such a vicious enemy?
"Long time no see, Great Sage." Looking ahead, Yang Jian's beautiful lips parted slightly, his words devoid of warmth, revealing his brewing anger. "No, I should call you 'Fighting Buddha' now."
Ahead, a handsome young man also floated in the air, holding a slender staff, his face bearing an arrogant smile that made one want to rush up and beat him up, his cute white tiger teeth faintly visible.
"Jian! Do you know how much I've missed you? How much I want to have a proper showdown with you!" As Sun Wukong spoke, he felt his blood surging, every cell in his body boiling, his adrenaline surging, his heart reaching a fever pitch.
"..." Yang Jian lowered his eyes, gently stroking the little thing in his arms.
A rival in love! A rival in love! A rival in love—!
Another rival in love? Jian's charm is just too boundless! Jingyan glared resentfully at Sun Wukong. What to do? He looks so powerful, he could flatten a pavilion with a single blow. What can he possibly use to compete with him?
Jingyan looked up at Yang Jian. Hmm, very good. Jian's expression didn't waver at all, meaning that the boy meant nothing to Jian! Very good! Very good! Excellent!
"Let's have a good, passionate battle!" Sun Wukong extended his right hand towards Yang Jian, as an invitation.
He really wanted to fight him! Sun Wukong stared intently at Yang Jian with almost feverish fervor.
In the celestial realm, there were plenty of weaklings, but only this guy could rival him. During the last time he wreaked havoc in the Heavenly Palace, they fought to a standstill, a truly exhilarating battle. If it weren't for that old geezer's interference, throwing a cheap iron ring at him and knocking him unconscious, he probably would have had his first truly satisfying battle, and even managed to determine a victor.
Later, he was imprisoned under the Five Elements Mountain for five hundred years, not only without time to practice his skills, but he also nearly suffered a back injury—who could blame him when that mountain was so heavy? In contrast to his miserable five hundred years, Yang Jian was in high spirits, his skills improving several levels.
Later still, he escorted that beautiful monk on his journey to the West. Although there was constant fighting along the way, those demons always used underhanded methods, flaunting their magical weapons, and none of them were willing to fight him with true skill, leaving him exhausted and unsatisfied.
Now, he serves under the Buddha, accompanying the still-beautiful and enlightened monk, chanting sutras until his tongue is tied and he's drowsy. Today, he finally gets a chance to show off his skills, and he's determined to have a fierce battle with Yang Jian!
A truly intense battle? Jingyan scrutinizes the other's piercing gaze again. Could his so-called battle refer to…
“Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof!” (Pervert! Shameless! Pervert! Beast! Get out of here! Jian is mine! I won't allow you to like him or lay a finger on him!) Jingyan barks sharply.
The smile gradually freezes, the hand that was meant to invite him clenched into a fist, and swiftly and heavily struck Jingyan's head, leaving him with a lump.
"What are you yelling about? You filthy bastard with bad tendencies, how dare you slander my character! Who likes him? I'll skin you alive, I swear I'm not human!!!" With that, Sun Wukong was about to strike again.
"Sun Wukong, why are you hitting my Xiaotian?" Yang Jian shielded Jingyan and took a few steps back, asking sharply.
"Ouch—ouch…!" (It hurts so much! It hurts…) Tears welled up in his eyes from the pain. Jingyan carefully touched the newly grown "little head" on his head. He had momentarily forgotten that this guy's previous life was that of a monkey, and he could speak various animal languages. (ps. Other immortals who are not born from animals communicate with animals through telepathy, and it doesn't matter if they can't understand or speak animal languages.) However, judging from his tone, he didn't like Jian. Great!
"Hit him? I'm not only going to hit him, I'm going to chop off his disgusting dog head so he won't pollute the environment!" Sun Wukong snatched the golden cudgel and attacked without mercy.
"This is outrageous!" Yang Jian conjured a small cloud, carrying Jingyan to the safety of a large tree. He then drew his sword and engaged Sun Wukong in battle.
In an instant, the world changed color; sand and stones flew across Jade Cauldron Mountain, shrouded in a heavy killing intent.
Wow! Jian is so powerful! Jingyan's eyes shone with admiration. His Jian's every move was not only breathtakingly beautiful, but he also completely neutralized Sun Wukong's attacks.
In the rapid exchange of blows, glimpses of Jian's curves, usually hidden beneath his wide robes, could be seen.
Truly…how wonderful!
"Really, I knew I shouldn't have let them meet, otherwise my Jade Cauldron Mountain would be doomed!" Silently, Jade Cauldron Immortal appeared behind Jingyan, bent down, and picked him up. "To save Jade Cauldron Mountain, please sacrifice yourself!"
Sacrifice? Sacrifice yourself? Sacrifice yourself for what? Instinctive fear made Jingyan tremble uncontrollably.
"This is a game quite similar to 'highball,' I hope you like it."
A sly smile crept onto Yu Ding Zhenren's sexy lips. With a flick of his wrist, Jingyan, trembling, shot into the sky like a cannonball.
"Whoosh—!" (Jian, save me—!) He flew past Yang Jian with a low whimper, continuing to rise at an incredible speed!
After a long while, just before crashing into the gates of the Immortal Realm, he stopped, and a second later, plummeted downwards at an even faster speed.
Waaaaaah—! Why is he so unlucky? (The answer is: Little Xuanxuan wants to play you to death! Any objections?) Jingyan frantically grabbed at the invisible air.
"Xiaotian!" Feinting a move to deflect Sun Wukong, Yang Jian immediately leaped after him, carefully catching the continuously falling Jingyan.
“Woof woof...woof woof──!” (Woof...Jian! Jian...woof woof──!) Jingyan, still shaken, cried in Yang Jian's arms.
"Jian! How could you be distracted saving a dog during a duel?" Sun Wukong jumped up and down in anger.
"Alright, stop destroying my Jade Cauldron Mountain." Jade Cauldron Immortal blocked Sun Wukong's path. "Weren't you here to deliver important news? You're not here just to fight, are you?"
"Important news? Oh, right, I have something urgent to tell Jian." Sun Wukong scratched his forgetful head.
"Master!" Yang Jian's beautiful eyes looked at Jade Cauldron Immortal. "Please stop bullying 'my' Xiaotian, no matter the reason!" "
My" Xiaotian—hearing this, Jingyan burst into laughter. He belonged to Jian, exclusively to Jian! It seemed he held a high position in Jian's heart; the fright he had just suffered wasn't in vain.
Chapter Eight:
The Immortal Realm had always adopted a turn-ahead attitude towards the demons living in the human world. As long as they didn't do anything that would anger heaven and man, everyone lived their peaceful lives.
But there's always a group of demons, seemingly born with an inability to be peaceful, who occasionally cause trouble, declaring their existence to the celestial realm.
The celestial realm is quite used to this intermittent, almost manic, disturbance, so when His Majesty the Jade Emperor heard that things were a bit unsettling again, he nonchalantly said to Li Jing, the Heavenly King, "Thank you for your trouble." That was all.
Thus, Sun Wukong rushed to Jade Spring Mountain to fight, incidentally informing him to join the battle in the mortal realm.
"When are we leaving?" Jade Cauldron Immortal watched with pity as Sun Wukong was dragged away by the ear by Tang Sanzang, his figure gradually disappearing into the distance.
Thank goodness Tang Sanzang arrived in time to take away his disciple, who was always ready to destroy the environment; otherwise, his precious Jade Spring Mountain would surely have been reduced to a pile of rocks.
“Now,” Yang Jian stared at Jingyan, “as for Xiaotian…”
“Woof! Woof…” (Take me away! I’ll help you…) Jingyan wriggled and snuggled into Yang Jian’s arms, acting spoiled.
“Xiaotian will come with me then,” Yang Jian said helplessly.
“Jian, do you think your master can’t protect a dog?” Yu Ding Zhenren frowned, finding the black dog increasingly annoying. Hmm… It’s been a long time since I’ve had dog meat; a taste now and then wouldn’t be bad.
Whoa! What a scary gaze! Jingyan instinctively curled his tail and shrank back.
“Master is powerful; no one can harm what you protect, but…” Yang Jian sighed softly, “Who else but Master would bully Xiaotian?”
Yes, yes, Jian, you absolutely can’t hand me over to him! He’s so mean! Jingyan clung to Yang Jian desperately, refusing to leave.
"Jian, you truly understand your master. You are indeed my most devoted disciple."
"Thank you for the praise, Master. I'm leaving now."
Gazing in the direction his disciple had disappeared, Master Yuding sighed, "Having spirit is a good thing, but Jian, you shouldn't have your heart set on another dog, especially a mongrel dog with neither good looks nor good manners. At least it should be a well-mannered, pedigree dog..."
After a moment of contemplation, he made a decision: "Once the war is over, I will find a way to get rid of that annoying black dog." Jingyan
, who was fighting while secretly watching Yang Jian, laughed with a lecherous grin.
What does it mean to be invincible, unbeatable, and unstoppable? Just look at his Jian! One sweep of his sword and a whole group falls; one kick and a string of others collapses. Ah—! He is truly invincible.
In the more than ten days of battle, his Jian's achievements were the most outstanding, greatly boosting his own prestige as Jian's mount (although Jian never actually rode on his back, because he was still too young). At the same time, he was even more worried.
The demon army, having lost many generals, regarded Jian as their number one thorn in their side, always swarming to surround him, attempting to defeat him with sheer numbers. The other immortals, however, were incredibly disloyal, retreating far away, completely disregarding whether their comrades were trapped in the encirclement.
So worried! So very worried! Jingyan worked diligently—biting the demons that Jian had beaten so badly they could only lie on the ground, struggling for their lives, hoping they would die sooner and be reincarnated.
"Xiaotian, watch out behind you!"
Hearing Yang Jian's urgent warning, Jingyan instinctively delivered a beautiful hind kick, sending the half-dead demon behind him, who still had a sliver of mobility, onto the direct train to the underworld.
Try to hurt me? No way! "Jian, thank you...
Oh no! This is terrible!" Distracted by his surroundings, Jian hadn't noticed a menacing demon charging at him with a large sword.
"Woof woof!" (Jian, watch out!) With a powerful kick of its hind legs (thanks to that bastard Yu Ding for training its leg strength so well), Jingyan shot forward like an arrow, clinging to Yang Jian as armor.
And so, in an instant, a blink of an eye, a flash of silver light, a long, deep gash appeared on Jingyan's small back, blood splattering out with great gusto. "
Ah, it hurts so much, such red blood..." His eyes rolled back, and Jingyan released his grip, falling to the ground. Ah—he's hemophobic! (ps. The blood here must be Jingyan's own blood.)
"Father, Mother, farewell forever! Jian, forever... forever... Waaaaah, I don't want to say goodbye to you forever! I don't want to, I don't want to!" —These were Jingyan's last thoughts.
"Xiaotian! Xiaotian!" After decapitating the monster with a single sword strike, Yang Jian gently embraced the bloodied little black dog. "Wake up, don't scare me, Xiaotian—!"
Chapter Eight (Part Two)
"There's a gap! Brothers, charge!" The monster leader waved his hand, and a swarm of monsters rushed towards Yang Jian. With
a boom, the monsters were torn to pieces and shattered into pieces.
"My god, it's that guy who's armed to the teeth and even more terrifying than Yang Jian—Nezha is here! Brothers, retreat!" The remaining monsters retreated like a receding tide.
"I haven't had enough fun yet, don't run!" Riding on his Wind Fire Wheels, Nezha charged forward.
"This kid!" Taiyi Zhenren sighed at his rough disciple, then turned to Yang Jian and said, "Let me see him, okay?"
"Taiyi Zhenren, please, please save Xiaotian." Yang Jian, his hands trembling, handed Jingyan to Taiyi Zhenren.
Taiyi Zhenren's hands glowed with golden light, enveloping Jingyan. After a long while, he withdrew the light, his expression grave. "Yang Jian, I need to return to the rear camp for a full treatment, to do everything I can to save its life, but..."
"..." Yang Jian looked at Taiyi Zhenren nervously.
"But please prepare yourself mentally." With that, Taiyi Zhenren flew towards the rear camp.
Mental preparation... mental preparation... mental... Could it be that Xiaotian is going to die?
No! No! It can't be! He had finally recovered from Xiaotian's blow, he had finally gotten used to Xiaotian's presence, even begun to rely on it, he absolutely could not allow Xiaotian to leave him now.
The corpses of monsters flashed before his eyes.
It was all these monsters' fault! If it weren't for them, Xiaotian wouldn't have had to go to the battlefield, if it weren't for them, Xiaotian wouldn't have been injured, if it weren't for them...
A strong killing intent rose in his eyes, at this moment Yang Jian had only one thought in his mind—kill!
Back in the camp, Taiyi Zhenren looked at Jingyan in amazement.
The wound had stopped bleeding, and the damaged bones and muscles were slowly healing on their own.
It was the most formidable dog he had ever seen in his life.
He really needed to be prepared; this dog's self-healing and regenerative abilities were beyond the norm.
"I hope Yang Jian won't be shocked by its healthy appearance when he returns," he thought, poking the dog's head and tugging at its tail. "How can I get Yang Jian to agree to let me dissect this dog for a bit?"
Taiyi Zhenren was lost in his own worries.
Chapter Nine
Waaah, I don't want to die! Waaah, I haven't won Jian's heart yet! Waaah, I haven't tasted Jian's flavor yet! Waaah... Waaah...
Hmm, who's touching me? Is it Jian? Jingyan opened his eyes. Huh, Taiyi Zhenren? So I'm not dead! Wahahaha...
"Make a cut here, cut open the skin here..." Taiyi Zhenren said with ecstasy, his hands not idle either, lingering and gently stroking the place where he wanted to make the cut, "The sharp blade cuts through here, the blood-red muscle and pale bone reveal a bewitching luster from the opening, ah... it's so beautiful, hehe!"
What is he saying? And what kind of look is that! It's as if he wants to devour him alive, my god! It's too terrifying! Goosebumps rose all over Jingyan's body. Ignoring that the wound had just stopped bleeding and been bandaged, he shook off Taiyi Zhenren's extremely perverted ghostly claws, wanting to jump off the table and escape from the tent.
"Don't run away!" Taiyi Zhenren reacted swiftly, grabbing Jingyan's tail and thwarting his escape plan. "Why do you want to leave my side? Haven't I been good enough to you?"
Taiyi's voice grew increasingly mournful. "I so carefully tended to your wounds and even generously tied a bow for you." He touched the bandages on Jingyan's body. "I'm not that kind to others!"
I don't want this kindness!!! Jingyan was on the verge of tears, wishing he were a gecko with the special ability to detach his tail and escape.
"You'll be grateful to me, won't you? You absolutely must be grateful! So when I ask Yang Jian for you later, you have to be incredibly affectionate towards me!" Taiyi Zhenren forcibly pulled Jingyan into his arms. "That way, I'll be confident I can persuade Yang Jian, and then, hehe, then I'll dissect you thoroughly, slice by slice, with meticulous care! Ah—imagining you soaking in formaldehyde is so exciting, hehehehe!"
(Qingxuan =_=: Did formaldehyde already exist in that era?)
"Woof! Woof woof woof woof woof! Woof woof!" (Oh heavens! Father, Mother! Come and rescue me from this super pervert's clutches! Hey—why are you hugging me so tightly? You're pressing on my wounds, woof...it hurts so much! Someone, come quick, or I'll die!!)
The tent flap was lifted, and Yang Jian walked in. "Xiaotian...Xiaotian! Thank goodness, you're still alive!" He had just managed to rescue Jingyan, who was about to die, from Taiyi Zhenren's arms.
"You, you came back so quickly." Ugh, I haven't hugged you enough yet! Taiyi Zhenren was furious inside.
"I'm sorry, Xiaotian, you were so badly injured for me. I, I'm not a good master. I couldn't even protect you."
"Woof woof, woof!" (Jian, don't be sad. You protected me well—you saved me from this pervert Taiyi!) Jingyan knew how to be affectionate at the right time—sticking out his tongue and licking Yang Jian's smooth, rosy cheek. (What coquettishness? He's just taking advantage!)
"Xiaotian!" Yang Jian returned Jingyan's kiss, sending Jingyan into a blissful daze.
"Taiyi Zhenren, thank you so much!" Yang Jian said politely.
"Not at all, it's my pleasure, Yang Jian, I..." wanted the dog.
"Xiaotian is still too weak, and the battle is basically won, so I must return to Yuquan Mountain. Taiyi Zhenren, farewell." After saying that, Yang Jian immediately stepped out of the tent.
"Ah... goodbye!" Ugh... he hadn't even asked for the dog yet, how could they just leave like this? It's so sad not having anything to dissect, so so sad!
At this moment, directly above the tent, Nezha floated, "Master, here's a big guy for you, enough for you to dissect for ten days or half a month."
With a wave of his hand, a huge monster corpse, following the laws of free fall, flattened the tent with a thud.
"Hmm, let's go find Sun Wukong to play with. He looks strong enough to fight me."
A resentful voice echoed from underground. "Nezha—! You've treated your weak master like this again! When I crawl out of the ground, I'll definitely reassemble your disrespectful head!!!! Ouch, it hurts so much! Someone save me!"
Chapter Nine (Part Two)
The injury was indeed worthwhile. Jingyan wagged his tail and lay on Jian's beautiful legs.
Jian was being incredibly good to him now, giving him delicious food and drinks, personally applying medicine and changing bandages. His gentle movements and voice made him feel no pain at all. He even drove away Yu Ding Zhenren, who was always eyeing him and wanting to kill him. Most importantly: Jian would kiss him from time to time!
Sometimes on the cheek, sometimes on the wound. Such a large wound healed so quickly must be thanks to Jian's sweet kisses. Jian was truly his destined one!
"Jian," Yu Ding Zhenren swaggered into the quiet little world of the man and dog with an extremely joyful expression, "Princess Jingluo has sent a messenger with a letter."
"Princess Jingluo?" Yang Jian looked confused. What could it be?
"Princess Jingluo must have something important to tell you to send a messenger," Yu Ding handed the letter to his disciple, "This prince is different from that prince who has been missing for some time."
The prince who has been missing for some time—could he be talking about me? Jing Yan looked up at Yu Ding Zhenren. Of course he's different! I'm so excellent! It proudly increased the speed of its tail wagging.
"That bastard prince, with his title of Spring Messenger, idles away his time, accomplishing nothing of substance. He leaves all his duties to his subordinates to decide, a complete waste of food. Prince Jingluo, on the other hand, is reasonable and fair, treats everyone equally, and often helps others in their difficulties. He's truly a model of a good man in the immortal realm! And he hasn't married any women..."
How infuriating! "How dare you belittle me like that, and... why does that tone sound like a father-in-law evaluating his preferred son-in-law?" Jingyan stopped tailing in annoyance, his face puffed up with anger.
Yang Jian unfolded the letter and read it for a while. "Beibei gave birth to seven children for Xiaotian. His Highness Jingluo asked if I wanted to go see them."
Of course not, you have nothing to do with those dogs! Jingyan shook his head firmly.
"You and Xiaotian have been master and servant for a time, you should go see them." It would also be a good opportunity to strengthen your relationship with His Highness Jingluo, and it would be even better if it led to mutual affection. Yu Ding smiled at the idea in his mind. Although His Highness Jingluo was a man, it was still better than Jian's heart being stolen by a dog again.
"Okay, then I'll go." Yang Jian handed Jingyan to Yu Ding Zhenren. "Master, you absolutely mustn't hurt it, for the sake of it being injured for me, okay?"
"That's because it's too stupid, it has nothing to do with you... Alright, if it doesn't provoke me, I won't provoke it either, how about that?"
Yang Jian nodded and turned to Jingyan. "Xiaotian, be a good boy, okay?"
"Woof woof...!" (Woof... I don't want to, Jian, don't leave me...!) Jingyan's eyes immediately welled up with tears, trying to hold Jian back with her glistening eyes.
"I'll be back soon, be good!" Yang Jian placed a light kiss on Jingyan's forehead and left.
"Woof... woof woof!" (Jian, Jian woof... Don't go! Don't go! Don't go!)
Watching Jian's rapidly receding figure, Jingyan cried loudly in grievance.
"So this is what a dog's cry sounds like. It's awful." After confirming that Yang Jian had entered the Immortal Realm, Yu Ding Zhenren tossed Jing Yan onto a chair without any pity.
Not bothering this stinky dog didn't mean he had to take good care of it, so he didn't break his promise to Jian.
"Woof—woof woof! Woof!" (You arrogant Yu Ding! I'm going to tell my father to kick you down to the mortal realm and reincarnate you as a donkey!) How could you treat an injured person like this? You have no conscience! After barking wildly at Yu Ding, Jing Yan listlessly lay down on the chair, immersing himself in the loneliness of being abandoned by Jian.
"I'm telling you..." Yu Ding Zhenren patted Jingyan's head disrespectfully, like a child bouncing a ball, "You should just give up. You and Jian are not a good match."
Taking advantage of Jian's absence, he would persuade him thoroughly, severely damaging the dog's confidence, letting it know how ugly it was, how utterly unworthy of Jian, and hopefully making it leave Jian on its own.
Chapter Ten
The wind that brushed past his ear dispersed the crying, but Yang Jian felt that Xiaotian's crying still lingered in his ears.
With a sigh, Yang Jian flew towards Prince Jingluo's Ningyin Palace. He was happy that Xiaotian was clinging to him, but this time he really couldn't take it with him. If something went wrong on the way, it might really leave him with incurable aftereffects, which would be terrible.
"Jian!" Jingluo waved to him in front of Ningyin Palace.
Yang Jian gently landed. "Long time no see, Your Highness Jingluo."
"It has been a while. I heard the other day that you had decisively defeated the demon rebels. Your skills are clearly even more impressive now. When
will we have a friendly spar?" "Your Highness flatters me," Yang Jian followed Jingluo into the inner hall. "It would be my honor to spar with you! How are Xiaotian and Beibei?"
"Xiaotian... Ah, look, it's here to greet you!" Jingluo pointed ahead.
"Xiaotian... Xiaotian!" Yang Jian crouched down and hugged the rushing Xiaotian dog, but didn't kiss it as he usually did. "How are you?"
"Woof woof!" Xiaotian rubbed against its former master's chest.
Jingluo looked away. Sigh—he really couldn't stand this master and servant pair, always so affectionate.
After a long hug, Yang Jian smiled and released Xiaotianquan. "Your Highness Jingluo, let's go see Beibei and the babies."
"Ah...okay, okay."
Jingluo led Yang Jian to an elegant room—Xiaotianquan and the golden retriever Beibei's bedroom.
Beibei was lying on her side, six puppies vying for their mother's nipple. The smallest one, unable to squeeze past its siblings, lay dejectedly to the side.
Yang Jian picked up the youngest and examined it closely. Unlike its siblings, it was much smaller and more delicate than others, born around the same time. But being all black, it was the only one that completely resembled Xiaotianquan.
"Woof woof..." it barked softly in its tender voice, its adorable, tiger-like face incredibly cute.
"It really looks exactly like Xiaotianquan when he was a puppy, so adorable!" Yang Jian affectionately stroked the little creature in his palm, thinking: Was Xiaotian a lot like it when it was little? It must have been. Xiaotian was so well-behaved; it must have been very lovable as a puppy. I wonder how Xiaotian is doing now. Is it still crying? Master didn't mistreat it, did he...?
"...Jian! Jian!" Jing Luo gently nudged him with concern.
"Huh?" Yang Jian snapped out of his reverie.
"What are you thinking about? You're so lost in thought."
"Nothing, I just think it's so cute. What's its name?"
"Its name is Haotian. Do you like it? I'll give it to you after it's weaned, to compensate for the inconvenience caused by Xiaotian's early retirement," Jing Luo also reached out to pet the puppy. "This is also Xiaotian and Beibei's shared wish; they hope you can choose one of the seven puppies to adopt."
"But..."
"With you, the puppy will definitely be raised to be a mighty mount."
"But I already have Xiaotian." "He had already made a master-servant oath with Xiaotian. If he took this little puppy back now, Xiaotian would definitely cry so hard that the heavens and earth would change color.
" "Xiaotian? Is that the fierce dog?" Jinglu recalled the super arrogant dog that had recently given him the cold shoulder. "That one is no good. It doesn't know any manners and has a bad temper. It's not suitable for you." "And it even acts like it wants to ride on its master's head and act arrogantly.
(Qingxuan: The great Prince Jingluo is indeed insightful. Jingyan's ultimate goal is indeed to ride on Yang Jian's back. =_=)
Yang Jian shook his head with a helpless smile. Xiaotian may look a bit fierce, but it is very kind at heart and also knows how to be affectionate. Why can't others see its true nature? Oh well, as long as he knows it in his heart, it is his, and belongs only to him.
Thinking of this, Yang Jian's chest warmed, and an urgent desire welled up from the bottom of his heart: he wanted to return to Yuquan Mountain immediately, he wanted to hold Xiaotian tightly in his arms and feel its warm presence.
"Prince Jingluo, Xiaotian, Beibei, I have to go back to Yuquan Mountain. I will visit you next time I have time." "No sooner had he finished speaking than he soared into the air, flying towards Jade Spring Mountain at an unparalleled speed.
Jingluo stood there dumbfounded, his mouth agape in astonishment. Jian was always so polite, yet this time he flew away without even saying goodbye. What... what... what could have happened to make Jian so disregard etiquette?
Lost in thought, a dark shadow rushed in from outside, knocking over the unsuspecting Howling Celestial Dog.
Had Jian remembered his rudeness and returned? Jingluo looked closely...
hurriedly flying back to Jade Spring Mountain, Yang Jian rushed back to the room he shared with Howling Celestial Dog.
"Howling Celestial Dog, Howling Celestial Dog, Howling Celestial Dog..." The calls abruptly stopped.
Yang Jian stared blankly at the mess in the room: books were scattered everywhere, chairs were askew, tables were overturned, and the only living being in the room—his master, Jade Cauldron Immortal—sat expressionlessly on the edge of the bed.
"Master, where's Howling Celestial Dog? Did you bully it again? Where did you hide it?" "Could it be that he's poisoned it again, Master?!" Yang Jian rushed to Yu Ding Zhenren, unleashing his unease like a machine gun.
"..." Yu Ding Zhenren looked up at his disciple.
"Master, say something, Master! Master!!!" Forgetting all about respecting his teacher, Yang Jian shook Yu Ding Zhenren frantically.
"Jian..." Yu Ding uttered a single word, its tone thick with the sourness of grapes.
"Master!" Yang Jian was so anxious he was almost crying, glaring angrily at the slow-moving Jade Cauldron Immortal. "Where is Xiaotian?"
Jade Cauldron Immortal solemnly raised his left hand, pointing to his chiseled, handsome face. "What is this?"
"Uh...claw marks?" Yang Jian said uncertainly. He knew that Jade Cauldron Immortal's skills were well-known in the Immortal Realm. The only ones who could have injured his face, besides the naturally born martial god Dragon King and the Phoenix Clan Chief, were His Majesty the Jade Emperor. "Did the Dragon King, the Phoenix Clan Chief, or His Majesty the Jade Emperor come to cause you trouble?" But it didn't seem like the marks those three would leave.
Upon closer inspection, Master Yuding's clothes were also disheveled, with black plum blossom marks more clearly visible on his robes. This…
“Yes, claw marks!” Master Yuding gritted his teeth and said, “It was your stupid Xiaotian who scratched me.”
Yes, it was that stubborn dog. A fierce rage ignited in Master Yuding's eyes, and his memories began to rewind:
after his earnest admonitions, Xiaotian had actually sprang up and scratched six straight lines on his face with its claws, and thus, a battle between man and dog erupted instantly.
If it weren't for the fact that it was Jian's beloved pet, if it weren't for its injury, if it weren't for the fact that even the most arrogant dog was still just a dog, he would have used his magic to punch it away—probably either sending it flying to Mount Everest to become a dog popsicle, or sending it flying into a volcano to become a hot dog—and what did he get in return for his conscience? A room full of mess and his own disheveled state. If he had known this would happen, if he had known this would happen, he should have…
“Master! What about Xiaotian? You…you killed it?” Yang Jian asked, trembling.
Yu Ding Zhenren snapped out of his reverie and saw not his disciple's concern for him, but worry for the dog. He was so angry he almost twisted his nose.
“Master, Master!!!” Yang Jian stamped his feet anxiously, “Tell me quickly! If you don't tell me, I…I'll cry for you!”
Yu Ding was speechless. Was this... this his most prized disciple? He was nothing but a little brat who never got candy.
Jian wasn't like this before; it must be that dog that corrupted him, it must be! Yu Ding clenched his fists in anger.
"Master!" Jian bit his lower lip, his eyes suspiciously welling up with tears. He refused to believe his master would truly bear to see him cry.
With a long sigh, Yu Ding raised a white flag of surrender and muttered, "It ran off to the Immortal Realm to find you. Didn't you see it when you came back? Maybe you missed it..."
Yu Ding watched his disciple's departing figure, speechless once more. This time, he felt an urge to find a blanket and cry his heart out.
A disciple grows up and leaves home! His master's charm was indeed no match for a dog. It seemed he had to prepare himself for his beloved disciple to marry a dog.
Chapter Eleven:
Ouch! Yu Ding, that big jerk! Jing Yan staggered towards the Immortal Realm, his bottom swollen and red, all thanks to Yu Ding's powerful kick.
"Ouch, it hurts! I can't fly anymore. I want to rest, but... but... what if Jian is snatched away by Xiaotian Dog right now? No, no! It has to stop it, it has to bring Jian back."
Entering the Immortal Realm, Jingyan stretched out its limbs and headed straight for Jingluo's Ningyin Palace.
"What a pity, you had a bright future ahead of you, but a vicious dog beat you to it." Jingluo sighed regretfully to the youngest dog—the little black dog Haotian. He didn't need so many guard dogs. If he didn't want Jian, who would be a suitable recipient? Lu Dongbin, one of the Eight Immortals? No, that guy has a severe phobia of dogs.
"Woof woof!" Xiaotian Dog barked worriedly twice.
"Ah, don't worry, Jian is very kind. He'll definitely change his mind in a few days and abandon that annoying Xiaotian Dog for the lovely Haotian!"
What? Upon hearing this, Jingyan, who had just arrived, nearly exploded with rage. His stinking eighth brother actually wanted to drive him away from Yang Jian! Unforgivable!
Jingyan stormed in, shoving aside the Howling Celestial Dog, and barked furiously at Jingluo before turning to Haotian. "
So, you little brat, you want to replace me? You wretched little thing, I'll eat you alive!" Jingyan grinned, revealing his gleaming white teeth.
"Woof...woof!" (Oh, so scary! Mommy, save me...waaaah!) Haotian trembled with fear, turning back to run into the golden retriever Beibei and whimpering.
"Woof woof!" Beibei, acting on maternal instinct, warned Jingyan.
The Howling Celestial Dog charged over and began fighting with Jingyan.
Jingluo watched the dog battle dumbfounded, somewhat making up for missing the scene at his beloved dog's wedding.
Just as the two dogs were locked in a fierce struggle, Yang Jian returned in time.
"Xiaotian!"
Hearing his voice, the two dogs simultaneously stopped attacking, wagging their tails happily and rushing into Yang Jian's arms.
"Xiaotian!" Almost shedding tears of joy at their reunion, Yang Jian caught Xiaotian firmly and held him affectionately in his arms.
Poor Xiaotian, however, was not caught and ended up eating a mouthful of mud in a classic dog-face-poop pose, whimpering sadly as he returned to his wife for comfort.
"Xiaotian, Xiaotian! I love you!" Jian said excitedly, "I'm sorry, I only realized my true wish now. I want to be with you. When you grow up a little more, shall we get married?"
Oh my god—! Jing Luo almost fell over, pulling out a handkerchief to wipe the cold sweat from her forehead, thinking: Although Xiaotian has fallen for someone else and quickly got Bei Bei pregnant, Jian, you change your mind even faster! Like master, like dog.
Really? Really? Jing Yan's heart was pounding with excitement.
(Qingxuan: Watch out, you might burst your chest!)
"Do you agree? Will you marry me?"
"Woof woof!" (Yes!) Jingyan nodded frantically.
"You're so good!" Yang Jian kissed Jingyan passionately.
His long-cherished wish was finally fulfilled, and Jingyan returned the kiss.
This was Jian's slender neck, this was Jian's rosy cheeks, this was Jian's full forehead, this was Jian's delicate eyebrows, this was Jian's eyes filled with fear... Huh? Fear?
"You...you..." Yang Jian's voice trembled, as did his body.
"Jian, what's wrong with you? Huh—" He can speak now, Jingyan thought, looking at his reflection in Jian's fearful pupils.
He had a handsome face, long black hair, sword-like eyebrows and tiger-like eyes... He really had recovered!
"Jingjingjingjingjingjingjingjingjingjingyan..." Yang Jian's teeth seemed to be chattering.
“戬,是我,我爱你,我们结婚……”
“你去死!”杨戬一拳揍在景琰下巴上,将他的人打趴下,将他的话打断。
“戬,我……”景琰捂著肋梆子,为什麽会这样,上一刻他们还在深情款款地缔结婚约,下一秒就被打,美丽的仙界与阴森恐怖的十八层地狱也太接近了吧!
(Qingxuan: I originally wanted to write it at "Between Heaven and Hell," but I guess Jingyan doesn't know about the Western
concept of Heaven and Hell, so...) "Is it so fun to tease me?" Yang Jian's eyes involuntarily welled up with tears. "You know I hate you the most, yet you still cling to me! And you even went so far as to transform into a dog to deceive my heart!"
"Jian, no, I..."
"Stop talking!" Yang Jian roared, cutting off Jingyan's attempt to explain. "Your Highness Jingyan, if before I simply found you annoying, simply hated you, and didn't want anything to do with you, then now I can clearly tell you: I will not forgive everything you've done! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"
"Jian..." It hurt so much, as if a knife had been plunged into his chest. Jingyan reached out to Yang Jian in agony, "No, I don't want you to look at me like that. I just want you to fall in love with me. Why is it so hard? Why..."
Ignoring his pleading hand, Yang Jian turned and stormed off.
"Jian! Jian! Jian!" Jingyan cried out in anguish, wanting to chase after him, but was stopped by Jingluo, who had just recovered from the shock. "Eighth brother, let go! I'm going after Jian!" "
Don't chase him. Let him calm down on his own. Going there now will only make things worse for him and make him hate you even more."
"..."
"It's better to go to Yuquan Mountain to explain after Jian calms down."
Jingyan nodded helplessly.
"Now... I'll go find you some clothes to wear. It's not shameful to become a dog. If you run around naked in the Immortal Realm, Father and Mother will be so angry they'll cry." Jingluo sighed. How fortunate he was to witness a dog become his naked younger brother, and this was the very dog he had just called a "vicious dog."
It was utter chaos.
Yang Jian rushed back to Jade Spring Mountain, throwing himself into the arms of the still grieving Jade Cauldron Immortal, hooking his arms around his master's neck, letting all his pent-up grievances turn into endless tears and mournful sobs.
"Jian, what's wrong?" Jade Cauldron Immortal, his heart breaking from Yang Jian's cries, embraced him, feeling the overwhelming sorrow emanating from his rising and falling back.
Yang Jian cried and cried, desperately, as if trying to shed all the tears he had in his life.
"Jian..." Jade Cauldron Immortal almost wept as well.
"Master... Master... Xiaotian... Xiaotian it..." Yang Jian stammered, his sobs breaking the words.
"What happened to Xiaotian?" Had something happened? Master Yuding felt remorseful. After all, it was just an injured dog; if it encountered danger, it would surely die. He should have protected it and gone to find Jian instead of getting angry with it. Now Jian was so heartbroken; it was all his fault.
"It...it...tricked me...tricked my feelings."
"Jian?"
"Master..." Yang Jian hugged Master Yuding tightly, "I hate it. How could it reveal its true form only after I had taken my heart...I...I want to take back my feelings, but...but how can I take them back? Master, tell me! Master—!"
"Jian, be good, don't cry!" Master Yuding comforted his disciple like a child.
Although he didn't quite understand what had happened, he would not forgive anyone or any dog that had hurt Jian. Xiaotian, I will kill you! Master Yuding gritted his teeth and made up his mind.
Chapter Twelve.
A bruised and battered Jingyan sat listlessly in the courtyard of his Jinghui Palace, staring blankly at the clear sky, reminiscing about the joyful times he had spent with Jian when he was Xiaotian.
One day, two days, three days… seven days! Good heavens! A whole week had passed without seeing Jian. Each time, he had been thwarted by Yu Ding Zhenren's tight security, and… he firmly believed that if he didn't have a father who was the Jade Emperor, Yu Ding Zhenren wouldn't have just beaten him up; he would have surely torn him to pieces and fed him to turtles.
If he could, he truly wished to be a dog for life, to lose his handsome appearance, as long as he could be with Jian, he would be willing to endure any sacrifice. But… God, why are you playing such a cruel trick on me?
"Oh! Why is Your Highness Jingyan so listless? This won't do," Princess Yuchen (do you all remember this guy? If not, please refer to Chapter 1, oops) swaggered over and patted his head. "Cheer up, look what good stuff I brought you."
She handed Jingyan a bone with meat on it.
"Princess Yuchen!" He's not a dog anymore, how could she give him something like this! Jingyan's eyes reddened with anger.
All he could do was blame his eighth brother, Jingyan, for his loose tongue; now the entire immortal realm knew that the handsome and dashing Jingyan had once been a dog.
"Don't be angry, I can let you see Jian!"
"Really?" Jingyan's eyes lit up. Although this woman often belittled him and made him angry, she had a lot of clever ideas and always kept her word. Perhaps she really could help him.
“Of course,” Yu Chen said smugly, “your biggest obstacle is Yu Ding Zhenren, and Yu Ding Zhenren is, of course, madly in love with my mother—the Golden Mother of Yaochi. He dotes on her in every way. Among all my sisters, I am the most similar to my mother. It’s no problem for me to hold Yu Ding Zhenren back, and you can take the opportunity to see Yang Jian!”
“Okay! Let’s go right now.”
“Hey, what’s the rush? I haven’t even seen you gnawing on the bone yet.” Yu Chen didn’t budge.
“Yu Chen, you…”
“I won’t go if you don’t eat.”
“…”
A true man can bend and stretch. What’s a little thing compared to seeing Jian? Jing Yan opened his mouth wide. Yu Chen, I’m keeping this in mind. You better watch out and don’t fall into my hands again, or else… Hmph!
Jade Spring Mountain
“Hi! Yu Ding!” Yu Chen waved from the clouds.
Yu Ding Zhenren looked up and couldn’t help but be stunned for a moment.
“How about that? I wasn’t wrong, was I?” Yu Chen said arrogantly.
"Yes, yes, then please try your best to keep that troublesome Yu Ding occupied!" Jingyan, still resentful about what had just happened, pushed her down from the clouds.
"Ah—!" Yu Chen fell headfirst, completely unprepared. Waaaaah—! If I'm disfigured, I'll kill you.
"Go!" Jingyan patted the clouds and rushed straight to Yang Jian's courtyard. He wasn't worried about what would happen to that wicked woman; anyway, Yu Ding Zhenren was there to catch her, so she wouldn't die. Yu
Ding Zhenren, with his superb skills, caught Yu Chen without causing her the slightest injury.
"Are you alright?" he asked the still-shaken Yu Chen with concern.
"No… I'm still alive." Luckily, she hadn't fallen. "
Princess Yu Chen, you're much, much heavier than before," Yu Ding Zhenren said seriously.
"..." Several black lines appeared on Yu Chen's face. "Master Yu Ding, when you hugged me last time, I was not even a hundred years old (equivalent to about six years old in human years)!" She now understood why her mother hadn't chosen Yu Ding as her husband back then. This man was so bad at talking.
"Is that so...?"
"Yes! By the way, Jing Yan just went to find Yang Jian. He dared to push her. Hmph, she's going to sabotage things and take Yu Ding to catch them in the act.
" "I saw it." Yu Ding said calmly.
"Then... why didn't you chase after him?" Could it be that he was moved by Jing Yan's sincerity? Yu Chen stared at his slightly mocking eyes. Hmm, probably not.
"It's okay, he won't change anything when he sees Jian," Yu Ding raised a cold smile, "He will obediently return to the Immortal Realm, never set foot on Jade Spring Mountain again, and never have any more crooked ideas about Jian!"
"Why?"
"...Giving up is also a virtue." Yu Ding watched a cloud drifting closer from the horizon, and two figures on it. "
Jian! Jian! Jian! Jian! Jian! Jian! I'm here!"
Jing Yan jumped off the cloud, his heart pounding, and rushed into the courtyard, just in time to see Yang Jian standing by a tree, lost in thought.
Still so beautiful, still so elegant, still so alluring to every cell in his body, the only change was that his rosy cheeks had turned pale, as if he had just recovered from a serious illness; he must have been missing him terribly…
"Jian—!" "Have you forgiven him? Have you accepted him?" Jingyan was so nervous his tongue almost tied in knots.
Yang Jian looked up from his reverie, seemingly surprised, but quickly regained his composure.
Thump, thump! Jingyan felt his heart pounding. Ah, his Jian smiled at him, his Jian walked towards him, his Jian parted his rose-red lips and called out "Xiaotian."
Sure enough, Jian couldn't leave him anymore, he was so moved! Jingyan opened his arms and stepped forward, wanting to give Jian a hug of the century to end the painful torment of their long-distance separation.
Just as they were about to reach each other, Yang Jian stumbled, leaving Jingyan with empty air.
"Jian..." How could you do this? You've become so mischievous! Jingyan turned around, both amused and exasperated, only to be dumbfounded.
Jian—his Jian—was actually crouching down and embracing the Xiaotian dog that had appeared out of nowhere, and was even kissing its furry face affectionately.
"Xiaotian!" Jian called out sweetly.
So, so Jian hadn't called "Xiaotian" but "Xiaotian" earlier! All that joy he'd felt, thinking the clouds had finally parted and the sun was shining, was wasted. Jingyan felt increasingly wronged and heartbroken, and the more he watched Jian kiss Xiaotian, the more his chest heaved with jealousy (jealousy!). He even coughed up blood on the spot to show his miserable state.
"Jingyan, are you alright?" Jingluo looked worriedly at his only brother's face, which turned white, then blue, then red, then purple, not understanding why his complexion was so varied.
"Why...why did you come here? And with this dog." Was he deliberately trying to cause trouble? So lacking in brotherly love.
"Well...Master Yuding said Jian wasn't feeling well, so he asked me to bring Xiaotian to play and keep Jian entertained. I've been here every day without fail these past few days, didn't you know?"
"No!" "That Yu Ding fellow has come up with another dirty trick. Didn't he clearly oppose Jian having an affair with Xiaotianquan? Why is he now... Could it be that in his eyes, the son of the Jade Emperor is not even as good as a dog?"
Having cast aside the despicable Jade Cauldron Immortal, Jingyan, unwilling to give up, walked to Jian's side and said softly, "Jian, I've come to see you. I'll play with you, I'll help you solve this, okay?"
Jian seemed not to hear, gently stroking the back of Xiaotian Dog.
"Jian..." Don't ignore him.
Yang Jian stood up, "Your Highness Jingluo, thank you so much for bringing Xiaotian to see me. Let's go inside and have some tea."
Leading Jingluo and Xiaotian Dog, Yang Jian dodged past Jingyan like a pillar that had fallen into the wrong place, and walked into the house.
In the next few hours, Yang Jian's "solemn indifference" completely shattered Jingyan's confidence.
It was better to hate and resent him than to ignore him. Jingyan, his heart aching, flew back to the Immortal Realm crying without any regard for his image.
Everything was under Jade Cauldron Immortal's scheme.
Back at Chunhui Palace, Jingyan wept for seven days straight, disturbing the peace of the surrounding neighborhood. To appease the anger of the immortals and restore their peaceful living environment, the Jade Emperor ordered Jingyan to annihilate a remnant of the demon rebels.
So, Jingyan, his eyes swollen from crying, sobbed as he went to the mortal realm. However, this unreliable prince was captured within half a day.
His attendant, Shi Yan (do you all remember this guy? If not, please refer to Chapter 1, lol), who was quite adept at escaping, reported to the Jade Emperor like this:
"My lord was really brave at first, probably to vent his suppressed feelings of being completely abandoned by Yang Jian. He beat those monsters to a pulp. But the good times didn't last long. The monster leader came out. That leader could read minds and transformed into Lord Yang Jian's appearance. My lord, my lord... just like that, he abandoned his weapon and ran over to hug the monster leader's leg, crying and shouting, 'Jian, why don't you like me?' and so on." How embarrassing for a master to act like this. "The monster leader knocked my lord unconscious with one punch and easily dragged him back to the cave."
(P.S. For the image of Jingyan hugging the demon leader, please refer to the scene in *Ranma 1/2* where Mu Jing hugs his bicycle and shouts, "Pu Shan, why don't you like me?")
The celestial realm was in an uproar. Jingyan was rightfully crowned as the most incompetent and foolish prince in history, and one of the candidates who disgraced the celestial realm the most.
It seems Jingyan has been bullied terribly again!
Chapter Thirteen: Chastity Crisis
. Golden Palace of Clouds.
Yang Jian, dressed in court robes, knelt on one knee before the Jade Emperor.
"Your Majesty, what urgent matter do you have to order me to attend to?" His voice was completely devoid of emotion.
"Have you heard about the capture of my Ninth Prince, Jingyan?" The Jade Emperor sighed inwardly. This brat of his, who always brought shame and disgrace upon him, he should never have given birth to him.
"I have heard a little." His tone remained icy.
"Oh..." It seems Jingyan's pursuit has had absolutely no effect. The Jade Emperor silently mourned for his son for three seconds. "I hope you can rescue him."
"...Is this an order?" Yang Jian looked up at the Jade Emperor high above.
Does that mean he won't go unless it's an order? "I suppose so."
"Your subject Yang Jian obeys!" He bowed, rose, and flew out of the Golden Palace.
Jian, I love you!
In a daze, Jingyan felt someone kissing him, not a simple kiss on the cheek or forehead, but a passionate, lingering, and captivating kiss, lips to lips, tongues intertwined.
Ah! Is it Jian? But is Jian's tongue that long and narrow? Is Jian's mouth that wide? Are Jian's lips that thick? Is Jian's skin that cool and damp?
Could it be... that the person molesting him isn't Jian?!
Jingyan opened his eyes in terror, nearly fainting the next second.
Good heavens! Good heavens! What a shockingly close-up of a face! Plump, round eyes, sausage-like lips, a mouth splitting wide to the ears—it was the face only a toad demon would have.
"Boss, he's awake," a henchman beside him called out.
The demon leader finally ended his long kiss, stroking Jingyan's face with his fleshy, webbed hands. "My little handsome man, my little darling, you're finally awake, hehe!"
"Don't touch me!" It was too nauseating; Jingyan barely managed to hold it in. He twisted and struggled, only to find his limbs tightly bound. Why was he here? Why was he being treated like this? He should be on the battlefield, fighting demons.
"Good, good, good! I love strong-willed kids. Watching you struggle between physical desire and reason is a truly beautiful sight!" Drooling, the leader ripped open Jingyan's clothes, lewdly caressing him and licking his lips.
"Bastard! Get away! You're disgusting! Ugly monster! Disgusting!" A chill ran through Jingyan; he wanted nothing more than to kick the leader into the deepest hell, never to be reborn.
"Disgusting? How could it be disgusting? Oh! Right, I haven't given you your medicine yet. Someone, bring the medicine."
"Yes!" A little demon scurried away, then immediately returned, handing the leader a cup of wine.
"Come on, little darling, quickly drink this cup of 'Blooming for You'!"
"No, I won't…"
Deprived of his freedom, Jingyan had no right to resist. His chin was forced down his throat.
Jingyan's face grew increasingly pale; he instinctively sensed that this 'Blooming for You' was no good.
"Can you feel it?" The leader breathed into Jingyan's neck.
His body grew hotter and hotter, and a part of him that he rarely touched began to itch. Could it be...?
"Yes, it's what you're thinking of. This is the magical potion that turns a chaste and virtuous man into a wanton virgin."
"...Get away! Pervert! Despicable! Shameless! I, I don't want to be intimate with anyone other than Jian!" And the other person was an ugly monster. God, he was about to throw up.
"Hehe, what's so difficult about that?" The leader transformed into a handsome young man—Yang Jian.
The leader gently untied Jingyan, but he was too weak to escape due to the effects of the drug. "Little darling, are you satisfied? Come and beg me for pleasure! I love proactive children the most."
Although he knew the other person was an imposter, Jingyan still couldn't resist the temptation of that face (Yang Jian's face). Ignoring the warnings of reason, his body snuggled up to him like a kitten, rubbing against him and moaning softly.
"Boss, go!" "Boss, hurry up and take him down!" The numerous lesser demons excitedly jumped around, eager to share the beauty after their boss had finished.
"Good, good, good!" The leader's hand reached for Jingyan's belt.
"Stop—!" A loud shout came from the cave entrance. In the next instant, a figure darted into the cave, snatching the already delirious Jingyan back with lightning speed and hoisting him onto his shoulder.
"Give me back my little darling!" The leader, furious that his prize had been snatched away, ordered his lesser demons to fight him. If they succeeded, he could get another pink and tender little darling.
However… who knew the newcomer was exceptionally skilled? He quickly subdued all the lesser demons and carried Jingyan away.
Yang Jian carried Jingyan to a secluded lakeside and splashed him with lake water.
"Ninth Prince! Ninth Prince!" Why is he so blank and lifeless? How can he take this Ninth Prince back to report? He should at least make him a little more normal.
"Ah... um! um..." Jingyan finally reacted, hugging his chest, turning around, not daring to look at Yang Jian.
"Is Your Highness alright?" Yang Jian reached out to turn him around, but was startled by his burning body temperature. "Your Highness, you..."
"Don't...don't touch me," Jingyan said hoarsely. "You go quickly, I...I'll go back to the Immortal Realm on my own."
"...Alright, be careful." Yang Jian activated a spell and flew away.
Although he was once again hopelessly wounded by Yang Jian's indifference, it was better than things falling into an irreversible state.
He plunged into the cold lake water, and it was hard to tell whether the liquid flowing down Jingyan's face was tears or lake water. He hoped his high body temperature would drop quickly, or he might just grab any man and do something that would damage the dignity of an emperor.
"Jian's gone, that's for the best...for the best..." The leader
of the demon cave
(who had reverted to his toad face) sat on a chair, crying sadly, "My little darling, I haven't even had a chance to enjoy him yet! Waaaaah!"
"Don't be sad, boss, we'll immediately go to a nearby village and catch a handsome young man to serve you." The little demons suggested considerately.
"Waaaah—we've already taken advantage of any good-looking guys in the surrounding area! There aren't any fresh handsome young men left, and even if some escaped, none of them are as handsome as that little darling from before!"
"Boss..." The little demons could only loyally cry along with their leader.
"Ah!" A sharp-eyed little demon shrieked, pointing a sharp finger at the cave entrance.
Ah, isn't that the handsome young man who snatched him earlier? He's so clever, get out of there! The little demons retreated in perfect unison, leaving their heartbroken, sobbing leader oblivious.
Yang Jian walked over, grabbed the leader by the collar, lifted him up, and glared at him angrily. "Tell me, what did you do to that man just now?"
"Ah? You're back? Let me go!" The leader struggled and thrashed about.
"Tell me—!"
"Ugh...it was just a cup of medicinal wine that turns men into virgins, it won't kill anyone," the leader said timidly.
"Aphrodisiac, you actually..." He made the Jade Emperor's son drink an aphrodisiac. If he hadn't arrived in time, then... The thought sent a chill down Yang Jian's spine. "Where's the antidote?"
"There isn't one," the leader said bitterly. "Just find a man to have sex with him, what antidote do you need? You know, there's never been an antidote for aphrodisiacs..."
"...What if no one does 'that' to him?"
"Uh, well..." Usually, the handsome young men he drugged would have... you know... what would happen if they didn't? The leader racked his brains. He had it! The prescription said, "They'd probably go crazy from the lack of relief."
"I'll kill you!" Yang Jian's eyes reddened with rage, and he gripped the leader's thick, fat neck tightly.
"Ah... I'll transform!" The leader used his ultimate move: mind-reading and transformation. Heh heh, becoming the person the other person loved most would prevent injury.
"...You imposter!" Did you think I wouldn't strangle you if you became Jingyan?
“You…how could you…do that? I am…your most beloved…ah, just now…that person couldn’t do it, couldn’t…no, I can’t…” The leader rolled his eyes.
“Don’t lower me to that idiot’s level!” Yang Jian punched the leader, sending him flying against the cave wall, turning him into a “wallflower” (such an ugly flower).
Jingyan was wondering what was going on now, had he gone mad? Thinking of this, Yang Jian could no longer care about the scattered little demons and rushed straight to Jingyan’s side.
Only Love Dogs, Not Immortals Chapter Fourteen (h)
Jingyan…
Yang Jian rushed back to the lakeside and saw that most of Jingyan’s body was submerged in the lake water, but his skin was still flushed from the heat.
“Ninth Prince! Ninth Prince…” Yang Jian ran over, pulled Jingyan out of the lake, and touched his forehead, which was alarmingly hot.
"Ugh—um..." Struggling weakly, Jingyan tried to crawl back into the lake, otherwise he would...
"Don't move, I... I'll think of something!" What to do? The icy lake water couldn't cool him down, and he wasn't proficient in healing spells. Could he only grab a man...? No, he was the Jade Emperor's son, he couldn't bear such humiliation.
"...Ah...Jian, let go...go...um..." After struggling to finish speaking, another strong desire surged up, and Jingyan could only bite his lower lip desperately, biting it until it turned blue, white, and bled, but he dared not stop.
"Ninth Prince...Jingyan, Jingyan..." What to do? What should he do? He looked so painful, could he only watch him go mad? No! Absolutely not! Then he had no choice but to...
Yang Jian tore open his clothes, revealing his naked upper body.
Heavens! Such intense stimulation! Jingyan almost succumbed to his desires completely. Did Yang Jian not realize that his actions would turn him into a lecher? Regardless of whether he had been drugged or not.
Yang Jian reached out and touched the small green glass bead on his chest. He had inserted it to prevent himself from growing too big, fearing that the weight gain during puberty would burden Xiaotianquan. Now it was time to remove it.
Softly chanting a long incantation, the glass bead slowly fell from his chest. The next instant, it shone with golden light, and Yang Jian shed his slightly childish appearance, transforming into a handsome young man.
"Ah…!" Seeing this change, Jingyan momentarily forgot his desires, only able to stare wide-eyed and frozen.
Was this… was this the true form of Yang Jian he had been pursuing? Narrow phoenix eyes, sensual thin lips, slightly slender yet broad and thick chest, long arms and legs—the only thing that hadn't changed was his fair skin.
“Jian…Jian, you…”
“Your Highness Jingyan, my apologies.” After apologizing, Yang Jian pounced on Jingyan, kissing him passionately, giving him no chance to refuse, while simultaneously unbuttoning their clothes.
Jingyan weakly responded, inwardly vomiting. It always seemed like he was the one on top between him and Jian, but now he was the one being pinned down by the 180cm tall Jian. (ps. Jingyan is 173cm tall)
Yang Jian flipped Jingyan over like a fish, (ps. don't blame Jian for not being gentle, he's a novice, a virgin, inexperienced!) and lay on his back, licking the long knife scar with his tongue.
“Ah…mmm!” Good heavens! The skin there was newly grown, extremely sensitive to external stimulation. Jingyan trembled, the desire to be penetrated instantly surpassing his unwillingness to be the dominant one. He twisted his waist, but was too embarrassed to express his desire.
"Jingyan, do you love me?" Yang Jian licked down his back.
"Ah! Ah—um, I, I…um! I love you the most—um!" God! He was getting closer and closer to that place filled with desire.
"Then…" Yang Jian looked at the chrysanthemum that was constantly dripping sticky white fluid, thinking that this was also one of the effects of the drug.
"Then…" What? Jingyan breathed heavily, feeling Yang Jian spread his legs wider and hold his waist.
"Then let's get married!" Yang Jian thrust into Jingyan's body.
"Ah—!" It really…it hurt so much. Although his body was full of that desire, that place that no one had ever entered could not be expanded so easily. Just thinking about accommodating Jian's clone meant he had to be prepared to die of pain. Of course, because it hurt too much, Jingyan did not hear Jian's words clearly.
"Relax."
Relax, you make it sound so easy. Jingyan started to sob, but because his crying sounded so much like a soft moan, Yang Jian thought he was enjoying it and continued his piston-like movements without stopping.
It hurts, but it feels so good too. Jingyan sheds passionate tears, moaning and swaying his hips to Jian's rhythm. Suddenly, a strange thought pops into his head: if he were still Xiaotian, and if Jian and he, as a dog, were to consummate their marriage in this position—him on all fours, Jian riding on top of him, or vice versa?
The
morning light's alarm clock—the noise of a sparrow chorus—awakens Jingyan.
So warm, so comfortable, so safe. He can't help but sigh contentedly, clearly showing his satisfaction with the arms and chest embracing him.
Huh? He always sleeps alone, where did this bedmate come from?
Jingyan turns his head and almost screams in surprise. Who...who is he?
His muddled mind explodes, a flood of memories from yesterday rushing in.
Ah—yes, it's Jian, the Jian who suddenly grew bigger for some reason, and yesterday he did *that* with this Jian. He remembered him lewdly moaning "More, more," and they made love seven or eight times, until he finally fainted from excitement.
Good heavens! He was too ashamed to face anyone. He'd better slip away before Jian woke up. Jingyan gently moved Jian's arm away from him, wincing as he stood up. It was fucking painful; this was the consequence of excessive indulgence.
He hastily threw on some clothes and staggered away. He simply didn't have the strength to summon a cloud to carry him.
Feeling guilty, Jingyan didn't even turn his head, so he was completely unaware that Yang Jian was quietly watching him flee in such a disheveled state.
"Yan, I will take responsibility for you," he whispered, "You won't escape from my grasp.
Those who are heartbroken run to the sea, while those who have lost their virginity naturally climb to the mountaintop. "
Exhausted, Jingyan lay sprawled on a boulder like a dog. He dared not sit, for sitting would put unbearable pressure on a certain part of his body.
After a good, cathartic cry, his gloomy mood eased a little.
Although it deviated slightly from his initial goal, it was still better than being violated by a toad spirit, and better than spending his life yearning for Jian, who didn't love him, becoming a perpetual virgin. Jingyan comforted himself, thinking, at least… he had tasted Jian's flavor, though not with his little brother, but with his tender hands… Little chrysanthemum, sob sob... And he also had the good fortune to see the super stylish adult version of Jian.
But... he knew very well that if he hadn't been in that helpless situation, Jian would never have touched him in his entire life. And now that Jian had touched him, it must be because he couldn't hide his suggestive advances. He didn't think this derailment would change the already hopeless relationship between the two of them. Jian, with his ascetic face, probably hated him even more because it was Jian who did this. Jian would hate him, hate him...
sob... But he couldn't be blamed. It was all that toad's fault, it was all its fault...
A rustling sound came from nearby, accompanied by a familiar, or rather, a voice that Jingyan could never forget, a voice that made him want to vomit:
"Oh my! That handsome young man is too powerful. I have to hide. Hehe! Who would think that a wounded and disadvantaged monster would not flee to a distant place but instead hide in the nearby mountains? I, Lord Hamo, am truly the most intelligent monster in the world, hahahahaha!" "
It's him, that toad demon!"
Jingyan Qingpan roared, ignoring his injuries, and rushed towards the source of the voice, "Where do you think you're going, you monster!"
"Ah—" Startled at first, Hamo immediately changed his expression to that of a lecherous wolf after recognizing the person, "My little darling, are you alright! You look so pale, you must have been devoured alive. That guy's technique wasn't very good, I can tell from the way you walk. Come, come, come into my arms, I'll give you a perfect sexual experience, making you feel good from head to toe!"
"You...you...divine punishment!" Enraged, Jingyan quickly gathered his spiritual energy, raised his killer weapon—a ball of lightning—and hurled it at Hamo.
"Waaaaaah—!" "After a scream, Ha Mo was smashed to pieces, leaving not even a corpse.
The revenge was taken, but how would things end with Jian? Who could tell him?
I only love dogs, not immortals, Chapter 15 (The End)
Jade Spring Mountain
"You... are Jian?" Jade Cauldron Master asked uncertainly.
"Yes, Master, I have removed the growth-suppressing glass bead," Yang Jian calmly accepted his master's repeated scrutiny, after all, no one could accept their disciple going from a boy to a young man in the blink of an eye. "I have something I would like to ask of Master."
"Just say it, whatever your request, Master can do anything." As expected of his disciple, handsome enough, he did not disgrace his master.
"I hope Master can act as matchmaker for me, and ask His Majesty the Jade Emperor and the Heavenly Consort for a marriage decree."
"You finally came to your senses?" In the end, you and Prince Jingluo were in love, that's great.
"Yes, I have decided to marry Jingluo."
"Ah? Not Prince Jingluo?" "Are you kidding me?
" "It's the Ninth Prince, Prince Jingyan. I think there's no one else in this world who would love me so foolishly. And although my feelings for him are not even one ten-thousandth of what he feels for me, in my heart, he is the only one who can make my heart ache and make me worry."
"You've fallen in love with that foolish prince?" What a tragedy!
"I don't know if I've fallen in love with him, and I can't say the word 'love' to him, but when I think about him leaving me and having physical intimacy with someone else, I can't help but want to take him back, lock him up, and not let anyone see him." Yang Jian sighed, then said with regret, "If only he could always be Xiaotian."
"..." What is this if not love? Master Yu Ding sighed. His disciple seemed to have only grown taller, and his understanding of love was still very shallow, but his feelings were pure.
"Please help me, Master. I must take on the responsibilities of a man for Jingyan."
"The responsibilities of a man?" This statement...
"I already embraced Yan yesterday, by the lake in the mortal realm." "
Master Yu Ding believed that today was the only day in his life he had ever been truly frightened.
Jingyan stayed in the mortal realm for a few more days, waiting until his body (especially his private parts) had recovered somewhat before finally flying back to the celestial realm.
Was it to celebrate the successful exorcism? Jingyan looked at the usually quiet celestial realm, now filled with festive cheer, decorated with lanterns and streamers, as if a grand banquet was about to begin.
"Your Highness!!! We've finally found you!" Shi Yan rushed in, grabbed his sleeve, and pulled him towards the Golden Palace. "Quick, quick, His Majesty and the Empress have been looking for you for ages."
Really, what urgent matter could there be? Couldn't they have talked about it tomorrow? Right now, he just wanted to go back to the Spring Blossom Palace to rest and recuperate.
Dragged along listlessly by his attendants, Jingyan didn't notice the smiles and strange looks he received from the immortals he encountered.
Arriving at the Jade Emperor's personal study, Jingyan faced his father and mother alone.
"Your subject greets Father and Mother." He bowed, thankfully he had rested for a few days, otherwise he really wouldn't have been able to perform the ceremony.
"Yan'er, you..." The Heavenly Consort had just opened her mouth when she immediately sighed softly, turned her face away, and her eyes were filled with tears.
"Mother, what's wrong?"
"Jingyan, you slept with Yang Jian?" The Jade Emperor went straight to the heart of the matter.
He...he knew it. Jingyan's face turned pale instantly. "Jian and I, Jian and I didn't...we didn't sleep together...we were on the grass..." God, he was going to be torn apart by his fierce father, even though he was his most beloved son.
"Who was on top?" The Jade Emperor's face was ashen.
“It was Jian…” Fearing his father would punish Yang Jian, he immediately defended Jian, “I begged him to do it. This… has a very deep reason. Jian had no choice, and I, too, was not in control. Well… it’s a long story. I wonder if Father has the patience to listen?”
“No need to say more,” the Jade Emperor sighed, “Everyone who needs to know already knows. Things have come to this point, and there is no other way.”
It seemed his father wouldn’t punish Jian, and Jingyan breathed a sigh of relief.
"Yan'er, you're truly remarkable." The Heavenly Consort spoke again, tears still glistening in her eyes. "To sacrifice yourself so much for the one you love, even abandoning your manly dignity, I... I'm so moved. You're far superior to your father. Of course, he'd rather die than abandon his position as Jade Emperor to travel the world with me." She then gave her husband a resentful glare. "I support you."
"Thank you, thank you, Mother."
"Jingyan, listen. I have issued a decree to bestow a marriage upon you and Yang Jian. The wedding will be held today. From now on, you will be Yang Jian's woman." The Jade Emperor said calmly.
"...I... I want to be Jian's 'woman'?"
"Yang Jian has already taken advantage of you. You want to be his groom instead of his bride? Nonsense!" The Jade Emperor slammed his hand on the table. "Guards, take him away, wash him clean, change him into wedding clothes, and stuff him into the sedan chair."
"Yes!" A group of heavenly soldiers rushed in and restrained Jingyan, who was trying to escape.
"Remember, tie him up tightly, this kid's good at running away."
"Yes!"
"Father, you can't! Mother, Mother, save me!" Jingyan struggled.
"Yan'er, take care. A married son is like water spilled from a cup, you must serve your husband well!" The Heavenly Consort cried tears of joy.
Forced to bow to heaven and earth, Jingyan was tied to the large bed in the bridal chamber, listening to the immortals drinking and making merry outside.
Those bastards used the Immortal-Binding Rope to tie him up and even gagged him, how dutiful!
After several rounds of drinks, those with low alcohol tolerance had long since passed out, and even the good ones were dazed. Yang Jian finally managed to escape the group of unruly immortals who were determined to get him drunk, and walked unsteadily into the bridal chamber.
"Yan! Yan..." Yang Jian pulled off the red veil, "I've kept you waiting."
Such a strong smell of alcohol, was Jian drunk? Jingyan looked at Jian, who was smiling handsomely, and he had to admit that Jian was indeed very handsome now, even more handsome than him.
"Come, let's consummate our marriage." He began to suck and bite Jingyan's neck.
"Mmm! Mmm..." Jingyan shook his head desperately.
"What's wrong with you? Is there something you're unhappy about with me?" Yang Jian removed his gag, his narrow phoenix eyes narrowing, a little displeased.
"Jian, you don't have to marry me out of responsibility. I don't mind that incident. Let's pretend it never happened, okay?" Jingyan hurriedly persuaded him. He had let go of the fact that Jian had taken him, but that didn't mean he could accept being Yang Jian's wife.
"Yan, my Yan," Jian's voice seductively alluring to the listener, "Didn't you clearly say you loved me? If you love me, why won't you give yourself to me? Could it be... you're lying to me?"
"No, I really love you, but..."
"But you won't let me be your wife, is that it?" What a mournful voice.
"Jian, I'm a man, I..."
"Fine, if you don't want to, then forget it!" He abruptly left Jingyan's side, pretending to walk towards the door. "I'm going to find Xiaotian. I refuse to believe I can't beat Beibei. Or I can snatch Haotian, raise it, and then marry it. I refuse to believe I can't settle down!"
"Jian, no!" Jingyan was sweating profusely, struggling between losing Jian and becoming Jian's wife. Finally—"Jian, I'll marry you, I'll marry you, okay? Don't go! Please!"
"Yan!" Yang Jian pounced back, kissing Jingyan's ashen face passionately. "I'll cherish you, you little rascal." Saying this, he started to strip him of his clothes. You know, a moment of passion is worth a thousand pieces of gold!
A man's word is his bond, so Jingyan had no choice but to half-heartedly and reluctantly let Yang Jian bury his member inside him.
"Ah... um Jian..." Perhaps having experienced it once, he understood the trick, so Jingyan didn't feel much pain.
"Hurry up? I understand!"
"Ah—" No, not at all! He had something to say…
but Yang Jian's rapid attacks left him only able to moan and groan, unable to form a complete sentence.
Halfway through, when he finally finished gathering the strength needed for the second phase, Jingyan was finally able to speak, "Jian…"
"Hmm?" Yang Jian focused on licking the knife scar on his back, for some reason he really liked the feeling of licking it.
"Occasionally, let me be the top, okay?" That's quite a concession, at least let him taste Jian's flavor as a man once.
"Okay!" The answer was straightforward.
"Really?"
"When you're taller than me." Yang Jian smiled wickedly, "I'm looking forward to it!"
¢£@#! ! ζ He's already fully developed, he's not growing anymore, Jingyan wanted to cry but had no tears, was he going to be pinned down by Jian in the negotiation room for the rest of his life? No way! His fate was so tragic, boohoo… who arranged this, he wanted to kill someone!
(Completed)
Appendix: Character Introductions:
Yang Jian: Qingyuan Miaodao Zhenjun, the most prized disciple of Yuding Zhenren. Originally a handsome young man, he later grew into a dashing man.
Jingyan: The ninth son of the Jade Emperor, madly in love with Yang Jian, and prone to jealousy.
Xiaotian: Jingyan turned into a puppy for unknown reasons, named by Yang Jian. He was fortunate enough to fall in love with Yang Jian, but it was short-lived.
Xiaotianquan: Yang Jian's original mount and dog lover, but he fell in love with another dog and got her pregnant.
Beibei: Jingluo's pet, who had an affair with Xiaotianquan, later married him, and had seven puppies.
Haotian: The youngest of Xiaotianquan and Beibei's seven puppies, originally intended for Yang Jian, but in the end...
Jade Emperor: The leader of the celestial realm, the father of Jingyan and Jingluo.
Tianfei: The wife of the leader of the celestial realm, the mother of Jingyan and Jingluo.
Yu Chen: One of the daughters of the Queen Mother of the West, a supporter of Jingyan's love.
Shi Yan: Jingyan's attendant, whose true form is a water lily, and whose hobby is sleeping.
Taishang Laojun: An old geezer from the celestial realm, whose hobby is making pills.
Taiyi Zhenren: Well… you all know him, no need to say more, just a weirdo with a dissection fetish.
Yu Ding Zhenren: Yang Jian's master, has a slight obsession with his disciple, but it's not serious; he likes to bully Xiaotian.
Nezha: Taiyi Zhenren's disciple, a fighting maniac.
Tang Sanzang: A handsome monk from the Buddhist realm. Sun Wukong
: A fighting maniac from the Buddhist realm.
Lü Dongbin: One of the Eight Immortals, has a phobia of dogs.
Shui Wu: Yu Ding's new disciple, fond of men.
Ha Mo: A toad spirit with mind-reading abilities, who almost sexually assaulted Jingyan.
Wu Ye Xiongling: One of the great readers of "Dogs," loves seeing Jingyan get pranked, supports Jingyan getting pranked, hopes Jingyan will suppress Yang Jian, but the result is... In short, she is the advocate of Jingyan's tragic fate.
Appendix: Everyone's Comments on
Yang Jian: So-called being loved is always fruitless, so you can only pick someone pleasing to the eye and marry them. Life is full of disappointments. (Sighing)
Jingyan: Why am I so unlucky? Turned into a dog, raped but not completed, injured, heartbroken, became a bride... Is there anyone in the world more miserable than me? (Repeated n times)
Howling Celestial Dog: Woof woof woof! Woof woof woof woof! (The dog language translator broke down due to overwork, please use your imagination.)
Beibei: Woof woof! Woof woof woof! (Same as above)
Haotian: Woof woof woof woof woof!!! (Same as above)
Yuding: My Jian is truly a beautiful flower stuck in cow dung! How could a scoundrel like Jingyan… (36,987 words omitted)
Taishang Laojun: Thinking about it, that pill that was supposed to be given to Lord Jian, to make Lord Jian and Howling Celestial Dog become of the same kind and work together to rule the heavens, was probably mistakenly given to Prince Jingyan… Hmm, let's keep it a secret! Jade Emperor
: Marrying off a son, how novel! Oh well, anyway, I still have eight sons, I don't care about marrying one off. (Things are valued for their rarity, if you have too many sons, they naturally become worthless.) Heavenly
Consort: I am the greatest woman in the celestial realm, why did I only appear once and have so little description? Why... (Gossipy woman, don't talk so much, not the main character! Shut up!)
Yu Chen: Why describe me so much? I'm so good, so beautiful! Can't you all see that? (Same as above)
Taiyi: Has no one dug me out? I'm so cold, so dark, so scared. Nezha, baby, have you forgotten your master?
Nezha: Where did your master go to play again? Humph, I'm going to travel the world too. (Nezha has severe amnesia, Taiyi, you'd better pray for yourself!)
Shi Yan: So sleepy, I want to sleep. (As expected of a water lily)
Jing Luo: Who wants to adopt a puppy? Excellent quality, elegant manners. (Selling)
Shui Wu: Are there any handsome young men? Preferably from the fox or dog clan, in the xx cave on the west side of Yuquan Mountain, the most handsome man of the century is waiting for you to come and play kissing! (Still lustful)
Lü Dongbin: I haven't even appeared yet, and I haven't done anything bad, don't spread rumors about me, I don't have a fear of dogs. (Haotian jumps to his feet, and with a single blow, Lü Dongbin faints.)
Sun Wukong: I really want to fight.
Tang Sanzang: Wukong, you can't, monks can't... (558,972 words omitted) (Grabbing Sun Wukong by the ear)
Hamo: ... (Has already descended to the eighteenth level of hell)
Wu Yexiongling: I'm innocent, I'm not the culprit, I'm not the culprit... (Repeating n times)
Shangguan Qingxuan: Thank you everyone for watching "Dog," did you laugh? (If you didn't laugh, I'll commit seppuku—of course, it's fake!!!! Making a face)

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