The years I was trafficked

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

I came from the countryside and spent four years studying diligently in the ivory tower.

I know I might be good-looking—1.65 meters tall, with naturally curly, slightly brown hair, fair skin, and slightly sunken eyes with willow-like, soft slits. Several boys in my class seemed to be completely captivated by me.

However, my goal wasn't that; beauty was insignificant to me. My biggest ambition was to earn a good job after graduation through knowledge and hard work, so that my parents and younger brother back in the countryside could live a decent life.

22 years ago, my mother gave birth to me prematurely and named me "Yin Xiamo": born in summer, almost gone like a bubble.

Later, I often thought how much better it would have been if I hadn't been born then; at least I could have escaped the calamity fate had dealt me 22 years later.

I graduated and started looking for a job. I went to the job market, and many companies seemed interested in me, but upon closer inspection, the positions were mostly limited to things like being a hostess in a restaurant. I don't care about that kind of job. What I want is an opportunity that can provide me and my family with continuous security. Since I don't value my looks, relying on my youth is definitely not my best choice.

While waiting for responses from several companies, I planned to go back to my hometown to visit my parents. As I got on the bus, a middle-aged man with glasses, a robust build, and a kind face sat next to me. When I struggled to carry my luggage to his side, he politely stood up and helped me put it inside. After sitting down, he generously handed me a wet wipe. After I wiped my hands, he asked if I was studying or working. I said I had just graduated from university and was looking for a job. He then asked what I studied in university, and I said Russian. He was surprised and then enthusiastically chatted with me about doing trade in Russia, even speaking a few sentences in Russian. We had a very pleasant conversation. When the bus arrived in Suining, he handed me a business card, saying he worked in the human resources department of a company trading with Russia and was recruiting someone fluent in Russian. He thought I was a good fit and hoped I would contact him. His surname was Wang, so I called him Brother Wang. We agreed to return together in three days, and he would take me to visit his company.

Back home, my parents asked about my job prospects. I briefly mentioned that I might go to Northeast China, perhaps to work for a trading company dealing with Russia. My parents were delighted. That night, my mother had a long, heartfelt talk with me. I secretly vowed that if I could stay at that company, I would work hard, starting as an employee and eventually starting my own business in three to five years to earn more money. Three days later, Brother Wang took me as promised, and we headed to Northeast China to investigate the trading company. After several days of travel, I started to experience acclimatization issues and developed a fever. Brother Wang treated me with great care and respect throughout the journey, and I couldn't help but feel grateful to have met such a kind person. I was in a daze, and I don't know how many times I changed trains.

Trusting Brother Wang's guidance, I watched the scenery outside grow increasingly unfamiliar, the road becoming more and more remote. I grew a little confused and couldn't help but ask Brother Wang, who kindly replied, "We're almost there, almost there. Everyone from the company is at the station, we're here." Finally, we got off the bus, where a tall, robust, and shrewd-looking middle-aged man met us and arranged a hotel. Brother Wang gave me a fever reducer, and I drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up, I found myself lying on an unfamiliar earthen bed. A middle-aged woman with a long, narrow face sat beside me. Seeing me awake, she hurriedly called out, "Dad, she's awake! Quickly call Gouwa over to check on her!" The first person to enter was the shrewd-looking middle-aged man who had met me at the station. Following him was a short man, about half his height, with a wrinkled, dark-skinned face, huddled in a group. The long-faced woman excitedly shoved the short man, "Go see your wife!" I stared at this scene in astonishment, wondering if it was just my fever still making me hallucinate. A short man with a limp walked over and sat on the kang (a heated brick bed). He looked at me shyly, then turned to the woman with the long face and said, "Mother, is this my wife? She's so beautiful!" Even if I were naive and foolish, I understood at that moment: I had been sold!

I had been sitting on the kang numbly for two days, neither eating nor drinking. Gouwa had come to check on me many times, but I chased him away each time. Gouwa's leg was weak, and every time I chased him away, he would flee in terror like a hyena trying to steal food. Finally, I collapsed again. The woman with the long face brought over a bowl of thin porridge and, with tears streaming down her face, forced me to drink it spoonful by spoonful. Her tears fueled my resentment. Through her sobs, I understood: Gouwa was born disabled, unable to marry, and his only son and grandson would die out. I also understood that Brother Wang had earned the 70,000 yuan that this family had saved through frugality from me. Suddenly, I understood: I needed to eat; I needed to escape. After finishing a large bowl of porridge brought by the long-faced man, I felt energized. I said to him, "Go get me a basin of water to wash up." Watching him excitedly run out, I jumped out of bed, opened the door, and dashed out like lightning. But as soon as I reached the door, I crashed into a thick wall with a thud: a middle-aged man with striking features blocked my way. He frowned at me, grabbed my hands behind my back without a word, shoved me into the room, and locked

the door with a click. In the middle of the night, the lock clicked softly a few times. By the moonlight, I saw a short, scrawny figure slip in.

I scoffed: "Looks like a dwarf, yet he dares to mess with me." I kicked Gouwa out a few times, then moved a cabinet to block the door. Exhausted, I fell asleep. The next day, the long-faced man moved the cabinet out. That night, Gouwa sneaked in again, this time with a rope. I punched and kicked him out again. After a while, the door opened. Gouwa's mother came in first, and she said to me apologetically, "Girl, now that we've bought you, you belong to my Gouwa.

Our Gouwa needs a wife, and our Shen family needs to continue its lineage. As long as you sincerely stay with Gouwa, we won't mistreat you." I sat in the corner of the kang

(a heated brick bed), glancing at her out of the corner of my eye, and gritted my teeth as I squeezed out a hateful sentence: "Get out." Gouwa's mother's face hardened, and she suddenly shouted outside, "Father!" A man with striking eyebrows and a gloomy expression flashed in, and Gouwa's mother hurriedly shouted, "Quickly, hold him down!" I immediately understood what this family wanted to do, and I jumped up from the kang in fright. However, Gouwa's mother pounced on me like a hungry dog, firmly pinning me to the corner of the kang. I kicked and struggled, and Gouwa's mother screamed in alarm, "Father, Gouwa, attack him together!" "Dogwa's father rushed up and pinned my hands behind my back. This burly man's jaw gripped the top of my head tightly, rendering my struggles futile.

Dogwa entered like a hyena. Dogwa's mother sat on my stomach, her two hands, accustomed to farm work, tightly controlling my legs. I tried with all my might, but couldn't kick Dogwa even once. 'Dogwa, take it off, take it off!' Dogwa was stunned by the scene. Suddenly, his face flushed red, he rushed forward and slapped me hard across the face. Tears streamed down my face. I couldn't imagine this scene happening to me.

My hair was already disheveled, and my teeth bit down hard on the fat flesh of Dogwa's mother's back. She screamed in pain, but only became more determined." Soon, my pants were pulled down, leaving me only in my white underwear. I began to wail, "Please, please let me go! I'll pay you back! I'll pay you back!" This cursed family of three showed no mercy. Gouwa pulled down his pants, revealing his underdeveloped penis, which lay limply between his legs like a burnt corncob. I bit my lip until it bled; I couldn't imagine being raped by this hyena-like dwarf. My body was stretched to its limit; I was using every ounce of my strength to preserve my virginity and purity. However, my underwear was still pulled down. I saw my long, white legs tightly spread apart by his long face, my thighs immobile, my feet kicking weakly in the air, clinging to my last line of defense.

Gouwa was excited; his ugly, dark red face gleamed with oil. He had received immense encouragement from his parents.

Gouwa lunged forward, pouncing between my legs. I was desperate. I screamed for help at the top of my lungs, hoping someone outside would hear me and come to my rescue. I felt Dogwa's father stiffen behind me. He used one hand to control my upper body and quickly covered my mouth with the other.

I was desperate; I wanted to die. I searched my tongue, wanting to bite down. Dog-wa's father noticed my attempt and shoved his fist into my mouth. His massive fist forced its way through my oral cavity; I felt like my cheeks were going to burst. Dog-wa continued thrusting into me, his soft penis pounding against my body, cold and limp, like a snake. I felt like vomiting. I used all my strength, and I collapsed. Dog-wa was covered in sweat; he looked at his mother pleadingly, not knowing what to do. Suddenly, Dog-wa's mother turned to her husband and said, "Father, come help the child." Dog-wa's father froze. The hands binding me loosened slightly. He stammered, "No way, the child has to do this himself." Dog-wa's mother said bitterly, "You show the child how it's done." Dog-wa's father hesitated for a moment, then grabbed a rope and tied my upper body securely. He stepped back, and standing between my legs was Dog-wa's father's towering figure. Dogwa's father sighed, pulled Dogwa aside, and said to me,

"Girl, my son and I can't be unfilial. Dogwa has never done this before; I'll teach him." I stared in disbelief at the scene before me. What were they planning to do? However, the struggle and the binding had exhausted all my strength. Tears streamed down my face as I looked at the father and son, screaming frantically, "No, no, you can't do this!" Before I could finish speaking, Dogwa's father had already pounced between my legs. He lowered his head, and under the gaze of Dogwa's mother and Dogwa, his thick lips covered my genitals.

A soft, warm little snake slithered through my genitals, and I felt utterly ashamed. I felt the snake powerfully licking from bottom to top, penetrating my entire labia. I heard a "tsk tsk" sucking sound as the snake's head slowly pushed deeper into my genitals. It grew hotter and hotter, and the snake began to move inside, writhing and twisting. A few pubic hairs were pulled, causing a slight pain. My consciousness began to fade, and tears streamed down my face. The little snake burrowed deeper, and then, a sensitive spot above my genitals was suddenly pressed down by a tall, powerful object. Dog-wa's father was stroking my clitoris with his nose. I heard Dog-wa's mother's rapid breathing on top of me, and I heard Dog-wa's urgent calls from the side. The little snake slithered outside and began to lick heavily, each lick pressing down on my clitoris. I felt a surge of heat in my lower abdomen, itchy and stinging.

I writhed restlessly, desperately trying to throw Dog-wa's mother off me. Suddenly, Dog-wa's mother lifted my legs higher: "Daddy, lick down there too." Dog-wa's mother's voice was panting, her body twisting incessantly on my abdomen. The little snake moved down and pressed against my anus. My whole body tensed, and I couldn't help but cry out, "Ah!"

"Daddy, that's enough, that's enough, let Dog-wa do it!" the long-faced man exclaimed in surprise. The little snake didn't stop; it continued to swim upwards, penetrating my vagina again. This time, the thrusting was even more violent, as if trying to burrow its entire body inside. The little snake became hot inside my vagina, so hot that I couldn't help but want to curl my legs up. I tightened my thigh muscles, clamping the head buried between my legs. I felt all the muscles in my body tense, and the inner walls of my vagina began to churn with the little snake. I felt my head throbbing, and I was about to faint. I tried to push the little snake out, lifting my hips and twisting forward repeatedly, but the little snake wasn't thrown off. Instead, it cooperated with my twisting, contracting and attacking again and again. In a daze, I felt a hand pressing on my most sensitive spot, kneading it incessantly. In an instant, my soul seemed to fly to the heavens, and I really fainted!

When I woke up the next day, it was already bright. The scene of last night felt like a dream. Looking at myself, I was dressed properly, except that my underwear had been changed to a pair of baggy floral-patterned trousers. I sat blankly in the corner of the kang (a heated brick bed), unable to tell which was the dream and which was reality. The door creaked open, and Gouwa's mother came in carrying a bowl of noodles. She sat on the kang (a heated brick bed) and looked at me, then suddenly said, "Girl, Gouwa failed to get things done last night, and you've suffered." Tears welled up in my eyes, and I scrambled to my feet, kneeling before Gouwa's mother. "Auntie, please have mercy and let me go. If you had a daughter, could you bear to see her treated like this?" Gouwa's mother was silent for a long time, then said, "Girl, if you leave an heir for the Shen family, we'll let you go, okay?" I thought of running away again.

For several days, I ate and slept obediently, sometimes even talking to Gouwa's mother. Gouwa, thinking I had resigned myself to my fate, gradually lowered his guard and stopped locking the door. One day, while Gouwa's mother was working in the fields, I took out my bag. My money and ID card were gone, but I found fifty yuan in a hidden compartment. I ran.

I didn't know the way, so I just ran wildly along the farm road. That day, Lady Luck seemed to smile upon me. I managed to catch a tractor and, after asking around, arrived at the town's bus station. I jumped onto the first vehicle, not caring where it was going; I just wanted to get away from this awful place. As soon as the tractor arrived at the station, a group of people suddenly surrounded it. Leading them was none other than Gouwa's mother.

I was captured and locked up again. I began my hunger strike again.

In the evening, Gouwa's father appeared. This middle-aged man, with his striking features, square face, straight nose, and upright posture, looked up at me helplessly. He seemed to have appeared in my dreams. Gouwa's father stood on the edge of the kang (heated brick bed) watching me for a long time, then suddenly said in a hoarse voice, "Girl, it's better to live than to die. Only by living will you know that there are good days ahead!" I lowered my head, tears streaming down my face. The man sighed, sat down on the kang (a heated brick bed), and suddenly reached out to ruffle my hair. "What happened that night, blame me. Gouwa can't get a wife, and our whole family can't hold our heads high in the village. From now on, I won't do anything to make things difficult for you." I looked up at the middle-aged man through teary eyes. How could such a heroic man have a despicable son? Was the terrifying spasms that kept appearing in my dreams caused by this man? The man's hand froze on my head. Suddenly, he pulled me close and hugged me tightly. I felt extremely weak, as if my whole body was being baked in a scorching furnace, and suddenly felt an indescribable warmth and comfort. My tears flowed incessantly, but my body involuntarily pressed itself against that warmth. The little snake from my dream came again, first licking my eyes, then my nose, and then crawling into my ear canal. My whole body went limp, and I even heard my own weak moans incredulously. I was utterly astonished and ashamed, staring at myself in disbelief. Was this really me? Did I make such a sound in front of the person who humiliated me? Before I could even process what was happening, the little snake suddenly pressed against my lips. I cried out in surprise, and the snake took the opportunity to slip inside. The little snake was so warm and thick, swirling around my tongue and licking my gums. I had never tasted anything like it. I remembered my first kiss with a boy, his cold, thin tongue pushing me away as soon as it entered my mouth. But this little snake was so domineering, so determined, slowly gliding in and conquering me. My tongue was taken by the snake, swirling together, and my soul seemed to have flown off somewhere else. Yet, I found my hands slowly wrapping around the back of that iron tower.

(XIV)

Gouwa's mother came in and saw what was happening. Gouwa's mother walked out without saying a word, closing and locking the door behind her. I felt the room was as hot as midsummer, the kang (heated brick bed) so hot that my lower body was melting into water. The man lifted me up and placed me on the kang (a heated brick bed), staring into my eyes. Suddenly, he asked, "Girl, what's your name?" I murmured,

"Xia Mo." The man buried his head in my chest, rubbing against my breasts. He unbuttoned my shirt one button at a time with his mouth, then lifted my bodice with his mouth. He cupped my breasts in his hands and sucked deeply. I felt a burning, stinging pain in my lower body. I squirmed restlessly, and images from my dream flashed through my mind.

The little snake writhed wildly, and I felt that soul-stirring, bone-melting dizziness. My breasts swelled, and my nipples ached from being sucked. I pressed the man's head firmly against my chest, a mixture of pleasure and pain surging within me. The man's breathing grew more rapid, his eyes red, pressing against my chest until he almost suffocated. I smelled a scent like wormwood emanating from me, a scent that filled the air. That man—he'd gone mad!

My first time was with the man who bought me to be his son's wife. He sucked directly from my breasts, his sucking and biting sending shivers down my spine. That hallucination returned; my vagina tightened, a sharp pain shot through me, and I groaned, unconsciously pressing the man's head down until I felt that little snake burrow back into my vagina, writhing inside. What was this feeling? Why was my blood surging, why was I so dizzy I felt like I was going crazy? My clitoris was constantly being teased by that little snake and the man's nose; I felt it swelling, engorged with blood, it strongly implying, "I want it!" Why those two words jumped out of my hallucination and escaped my lips, I don't know. The man didn't stop. He spread my thighs apart, his fingers prying open my labia. The little snake disappeared, replaced by something harder, more powerful, more stimulating. A series of rapid thrusts, and I cried out. My body arched back, the hard thing thickening, becoming even more powerful, thrusting faster. The man grabbed my protruding breast with one hand and kneaded it incessantly. Suddenly, he lunged at me, his teeth clenched close to my ear, and said, "If you yell 'I want it again,' I'll take you for Gouwa!" Gouwa, that lewd man. My blood ran cold, and my body relaxed. I regained my senses and suddenly remembered that I was a trafficked person. I bit down hard on his shoulder, biting harder and harder until blood filled my mouth.

The man didn't move, letting me bite him. Suddenly, he let out a long growl, flipped me over onto the bed, pinned my hands down, and quickly pulled down my pants, which were already down to my knees. I snapped back to reality and began to struggle desperately. The man held me down with both hands, and I knelt, face down on the bed, my genitals raised high. The man's large mouth immediately took my genitals into his mouth. He licked slowly, my vagina, my anus, and I melted little by little, my stiff body slowly going limp. He pulled down his pants, turned me over, and I felt, terrified, a huge, hard thing pressed against my genitals, so hot, so scalding, as if it were roasting me alive. I screamed, shouting "No!" but the sound was muffled by the small snake. The man licked my lips and whispered, "Xia Mo, I'll be gentle!" Then, the enormous object slid in, harder and hotter, until, in its final, desperate thrust, I screamed, "Ah!!"

I felt ashamed of myself, but I couldn't help but fall into a love for this game. It was as if the latent energy within my body was waiting to be awakened. The next day, I woke up refreshed, all the lingering unease gone. I looked in the small mirror in my room, and my eyes seemed to shimmer with a magical light, my fair skin glowing with an unusual luster. Thinking of the several nights of intercourse, of the frenzied ecstasy after the pain, my heart pounded like a deer.

On the third night, Gouwa's father came. He gently closed the door, came up and embraced me, showering me with a passionate kiss without a word.

Hair, eyes, nose, mouth, breasts, and finally, his large mouth enveloped my labia. I was no longer naive, no longer ignorant; every cell in my body yearned for his suckling, his penetration.

I became aroused, my vagina became wet, and I could feel the love juice slowly moistening the still slightly swollen inner walls. I spread my legs wide, wholeheartedly accepting every inch of his licking. Once again, I felt dizzy and disoriented, with only one thought in my mind: I want him, I want him inside me.

The moment came; something was inserted into my vagina. My aroused cells were stimulated, and my body struggled to rise and receive the penetration. It came, somewhat like a test, little by little, very carefully. My inner walls began to writhe, yearning for this envelopment to be larger and firmer. However, the object probed at the entrance of my vagina for a moment, then withdrew. I became suspicious, yet I felt the large hand caressing my chest still so strong, the fingers lingering on my clitoris still so alluring. I reached out with both hands, pressed my buttocks between my legs, and tried to push inward with all my might. Suddenly, I felt the muscles I was pressing were so soft, the skin so cold. I opened my dazed eyes and saw Gouwa and his father in front of me. Gouwa's father was kneading my breasts and my clitoris, while Gouwa, helplessly, tried again and again to penetrate my forbidden zone.

I came to my senses and understood what role I ultimately played.

I was pregnant, not with Gouwa's daughter, but with Gouwa's sister. Gouwa's father and mother devoted themselves to taking care of me during my pregnancy, while Gouwa was sent to work at an oil press. In winter, I gave birth to a baby girl. The man silently cared for me during my postpartum period, without touching me.

I spent more and more time in this place, and Gouwa's mother remained wary of me, afraid I would escape. Every time I sent a letter asking for help, it was secretly given to Gouwa's mother. The town's postman was also bribed; whenever he saw a letter I had sent, he would secretly give it to Gouwa's mother. Several children in the village who couldn't afford to go to school came to my home, and I taught them to read and write every day since I had nothing else to do. Finally, I took a liking to a clever little boy named Wu Xiaoqing. I wrote a letter and asked him to mail it to another town. Wu Xiaoqing completed this task, and my withered heart began to have hope again.

Six months after giving birth, my body often began to feel hot. Lying on the kang (a heated brick bed), I would sometimes be unable to resist gently stroking my genitals, slowly kneading the sensitive spot that I fantasized about taking me to heaven. Gouwa's father was under control and could not easily enter my room. Next door, I could often hear the "bang bang" sounds of Gouwa's parents colliding, and I could hear Gouwa's mother's pitiful moans. At these times, I would gently rub my clitoris, fantasizing about those few soul-stirring penetrations, sometimes also taking me to heaven. I often couldn't control my moans; the moans of a young woman already carried a unique melodiousness and viscous quality. I could feel that whenever my moans rang out, the "bang bang" of pounding next door would suddenly quicken, and Gouwa's father would let out a hateful growl.

Half a month after the letter was sent, the police came. On the day they were collecting evidence, the villagers all gathered at Gouwa's house, surrounding the police car, determined not to let the police take me away. The police asked me if I wanted to leave, and I said yes, with tears in my eyes, but asked for some time to talk things over. In the evening, the police went to town to rest, and the villagers dispersed. I boiled hot water and carefully washed myself. Gouwa's father stared at me blankly, an indescribable melancholy in his eyes. Gouwa's mother kept muttering, "Seventy thousand yuan, barely spent a few times, and it's all gone." That night, Gouwa's mother slept next door with her daughter, while I tossed and turned on the kang (heated brick bed). In the night, as I had hoped, the door opened. A man's towering silhouette appeared before the kang. Without a word, without a moment's hesitation, we mingled together like parched seedlings in a long drought, burning like a raging fire. My vagina seemed to burst forth like a floodgate, gushing forth under his sucking. He sucked frantically with all his might, afraid to miss a single spot, a single drop. A frenzy swept over me, and I knew that perhaps tomorrow, perhaps the day after, I would be gone. This madness, this excitement, was merely to leave a memory for the future. This strong and valiant Northeastern farmer, his hardness, his thrusts—everything about him filled me with ecstasy, everything about him made me yearn for him.

Again and again, I thrust my hips forward, offering him deeper and more powerful suction. His penis grew harder and harder, his thrusts more and more forceful. The man used all his strength to complete our union that night.

I didn't care about anything else; I screamed, I suspected the whole village heard my moans, my screams. My fingernails dug into his skin; those would be my marks. I can't remember if it was the fourth or fifth time, but I was panting as I embraced him, my soul soaring higher and higher, savoring this decadent pleasure. The man licked and sucked every inch of my skin, and when his tongue lingered at my anus, he stirred and thrust for a long time. My skin trembled, and a peculiar pleasure spread to my scalp. I jumped off the bed naked, went to the outer room to get soap, and after wetting it, I lightly applied it to my anus and his penis. His penis circled and probed at my anus, slowly, before pushing in a little. I gasped, a strong sense of tension gripping me. "Slower, slower," he said, continuing to advance, my anus being stretched open little by little, a little more, then a little more, until finally, my petal-like anus completely absorbed the entire thick penis. I took a breath, and the man began to thrust, inserting several fingers into my vagina, pumping in and out. Faster and faster, more and more thrilling. Finally, I collapsed onto the bed in ecstasy from the man's violent ejaculation.

On the third day, after much negotiation by the police, I walked step by step to the police car with their help as evening approached. Gouwa's mother, holding her daughter, followed behind me, tears welling in her eyes. I looked back at my daughter; she already bore my shadow—slightly brown curly hair, fair skin, large, sunken eyes. Goodbye, my daughter. I was leaving this place that had stripped me of my shame and soul. I was returning to my own world to pursue my life, my happiness.

Sitting in the police car, I looked back at the village. Under the locust tree at the village entrance, that towering figure appeared, the setting sun casting a long shadow. I knew that this figure, along with those soul-stirring nights, would be etched into my dreams, unforgettable, and needless to forget.

[The End]

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The years I was trafficked

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