The three essentials for sexual life

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Traditional Chinese medicine believes that excessive sexual desire damages one's essence, qi, and spirit. Essence, qi, and spirit are the three treasures of human
life. Inappropriate and excessive sexual activity is referred to as excessive sexual desire in traditional Chinese medicine. In addition to often causing sexual dysfunction, excessive sexual desire is also an important factor in causing physical weakness, fatigue, and premature aging. Because essence generates qi, and qi generates spirit, to maintain health, one should first preserve essence. When essence is abundant, qi is strong; when qi is strong, spirit is vigorous; when spirit is vigorous, the body is healthy, and the body is less prone to illness. Internally, the five internal organs are radiant; externally, the skin is moist, the complexion is radiant, and one remains vigorous even in old age. Therefore, health practitioners regard essence, qi, and spirit as the three treasures, especially essence. To preserve essence, one must first abstain from sexual desire. In this regard, our predecessors have many discussions and practical experiences, which are briefly introduced below:
(I) Sexual activity should not be abstained from
. Sexual activity is a normal human nature. Normal sexual activity brings pleasure to both men and women, harmonizes yin and yang, and is beneficial to physical and mental health. The *Zunsheng Bajian* states: "The Yellow Emperor said that the balance of Yin and Yang is called the Dao, and an imbalance of Yin or Yang is called disease. When Yin and Yang are not in harmony, it is like spring without autumn, or winter without summer. Therefore, to harmonize them is to regulate the sage's measure. The perfect man does not sever the Dao of union, but is content with seclusion to preserve his innate nature." This means that sexual intercourse between men and women is a normal physiological phenomenon. A life of celibacy (i.e., an imbalance of Yin and Yang) can lead to negative emotions and even various diseases. The way to live well is not about abstaining from sexual intercourse, but about not overdoing it, so as to avoid the wasteful depletion of vital essence and to preserve the tranquil innate energy.
(II) Sexual activity should not begin too early.
The ancient Chinese philosopher and educator Confucius once said, "In youth, the blood and qi are not yet settled; one should be wary of lust." According to the discussion in *Suwen: On the Primordial Innocence of Antiquity* regarding the physiological processes of human growth and development and the important role of the kidneys, a boy's kidney qi begins to accumulate around age eight, and reaches its peak at age sixteen. Based on kidney essence, this promotes the production of Tian Gui (a concept in Traditional Chinese Medicine), the essence overflows and can be released, allowing for sexual intercourse and the birth of children. However, if one relies too heavily on this period of abundant blood and qi and engages in sexual intercourse too early... Early sexual activity, or even excessive sexual activity, will damage one's essence and vital energy. Like flowers in a garden, those that bloom too early will wither first. Therefore, the *Wan Family's Four Essentials of Health Preservation* points out: "Many men today, before the age of sixteen, engage in sexual intercourse to release their essence. Their essence is not full before ejaculation, leaving the five internal organs deficient, leading to various unsightly illnesses in the future." It further states, "If the kidney essence is insufficient, it draws from the internal organs; if the internal organs' essence is insufficient, it draws from the bone marrow. Therefore, when the essence of the internal organs is exhausted, there will be painful urination and dry stools; when the bone marrow is exhausted, there will be weakness in the head and legs, and pain in the lower back… How can one last long?" This illustrates that early sexual intercourse affects the growth and development of other internal organs and can even lead to various diseases. The famous Song Dynasty gynecological treatise *Complete Collection of Effective Prescriptions for Women* states: "Even if a man is sixteen and has developed sexual function, he must marry at thirty; even if a woman is fourteen and has her first menstruation, she must marry at twenty." It also states, "Only when yin and yang are complete can intercourse lead to pregnancy, and the child will be strong and long-lived…." "From the perspective of eugenics, it proposes that sexual intercourse should not be too early, as well as the age and benefits of late marriage. This is consistent with the spirit of the marriage age stipulated in China's Marriage Law, which stipulates that men should not marry before the age of 22 and women should not marry before the age of 20.
(III) Sexual life should not be excessive .
Many health preservation literature in China emphasizes that sexual life should not be excessive. For example, the "Sanyuan Canzan Yanshou Shu" says: "Excessive worry will damage the essence. What people cherish is life, what they should not cherish is the body. What is important is essence. If the liver essence is not firm, the eyes will be dizzy and dull; if the lung essence is not sufficient, the muscles will be thin; if the kidney essence is not firm, the spirit will be reduced; if the spleen essence is not firm, the teeth and hair will be loose and painful. If the true essence is not dissipated, disease will follow and death will follow." It points out the harm of excessive sexual life to the body and internal organs. The book also points out: "In the way of Yin and Yang, the essence is empty. Be careful and calm, and you will not grow old after birth." It believes that maintaining essence is one of the important measures to prolong life.
(IV) Sexual life should be avoided.

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