10 moderately heavy-handed jokes

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1. When I was a child, I was a naughty eater. An old farmer, in an attempt to teach me a lesson, said to me: "Life was tough in the 1960s. There was no food to eat, and people never threw away the boogers they picked from their noses!"
Comment: Um, well, you might as well just say you even ate the manure used for irrigation.
2. A wealthy man was hiring a maid. The interview question was about using the toilet. The first few maids came out without washing their hands, so the wealthy man dismissed them. Only one maid washed her hands, so the wealthy man hired her. However, one day, the wealthy man noticed that she hadn't washed her hands afterward. The wealthy man asked her why. The maid replied, "I brought toilet paper with me today..."
Comment: No matter how meticulous you are, what you can't see is the most real.
3. A man took his friend to visit his grandmother. While he was talking to her, his friend started eating the peanuts on the coffee table and finished them all. As they were leaving, his friend said to his grandmother, "Thank you for the peanuts." His grandmother replied, "Oh! Um! Sigh! Ever since I lost all my teeth, I can only suck off the chocolate coating. Getting old, cough..."
Comment: If you keep talking so rudely and eat things without asking, you'll get your comeuppance.
4. One day, Little A-Ku was bored and went to the park to play. Suddenly, he saw an old man selling those little chubby candies from his childhood, so he bought one. He was so happy! He even took a nice picture of the candy, and then he ran to a corner and secretly ate it all… But soon after, he felt uncomfortable in his stomach. He thought, “Damn it! That lousy candy, I need to find a place to poop…” He hurriedly ran to the park's public toilet, pulled down his pants, and there was a loud rumbling sound… An old man walking by the toilet was startled… He thought, “Could it be… going to rain on such a sunny day? I have to go home quickly…” A little boy passing by was also frightened… He thought… “On such a sunny day… could a monster be appearing? I have to go home quickly.” The scene shifts back to Little A-Ku… At first, his pooping was smooth… but then a terrifying scene occurred… He discovered a pale, slender finger sticking out of his cute bottom! Ugh! Another pig-slaughtering sound... He quickly pulled up his pants and ran as fast as he could, until he reached a secluded corner. Catching his breath, his hands trembling, he pulled down his pants and took a closer look! Hey~ what the heck... it was a giant roundworm...
Comment: I don't care what you think, I really find this joke disgusting.
5. A boy logged onto QQ and found a girl online, so he sent her a message.
Man: Are you free tonight?
Woman: Yes, what do you want to do?
[A Minute of Calm]
Man: Yes!
Comment: The internet is harmful; look at what's going on in people's minds these days.
6. A country girl who came to the city to work went to the telecommunications bureau to make a phone call to her mother back home. A male clerk said she had to pay fifty yuan first. The country girl said, "I don't have that much money, but if you let me make the call, I'm willing to do anything for you."
"Really? Then come with me," the salesperson said.
He went into the next room and said to the country girl, "Come in, and close the door."
The country girl did as he said, and then he added, "Kneel down."
The country girl did as he was told, and he continued, "Unzip my zipper." After the country girl unzipped her zipper, he said again:
"Keep going, take it out."
Hearing this, the country girl took out the thing and held it with both hands. At this moment, the male sales clerk said impatiently, "Hurry up, start already!"
So the country girl brought her mouth close to the thing and said, "Hello, is this Mom?"
Comment: What era are these country girls and sales clerks from?
7. A man was surrounded by cannibals in the forest. In despair, he cried out, "God, I'm doomed!" Just then, God's voice came from the sky: "Child, still not? Do you see that big rock ahead? Pick it up and throw it at the elder, kill him!" The man did as he was told, and the cannibal elder was indeed killed. The cannibals all looked grotesque. Then God said, "Now you're truly doomed..."
Comment: This thing is definitely not God, it must be from an enemy tribe.
8. Question: Superman and Superwoman were flying in the sky when they suddenly fell down.
After Superman fell to the ground and walked away, there was a hole in the ground.
After Supergirl fell to the ground and walked away, there were two holes in the ground.
Why?
Answer: Superman lands on his head, Superwoman lands on her feet.
Comment: Whoever is wrong should go stand in the corner and reflect on their actions.
9. Sun: "Fuck you? I'll fuck you."
Grass: "What the hell are you?"
Sun: "Damn it!"
Damn it: "Who the hell are you?"
Sun: "Damn it, you son of a bitch?"
"Damn it, who the hell are you?!"
Sun: "I'm suning! I'm suning!"
Grass: "Holy crap!"
At that moment, the sun's mother answered the phone: "Fuck your mother, you're grass, aren't you? Where's your mother, grass?"
Comment: It seems that the invention of some words still greatly hinders communication.
10. A couple went hiking in the countryside and suddenly encountered a savage. The savage said, "Eat each other's excrement and I'll let you go." So they did. The savage let them go. On the way back, neither of them spoke. After a long time, the woman started wailing and said, "You don't love me." The man was puzzled and asked why. The woman said, "If you loved me, you wouldn't have pooped so much."

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10 moderately heavy-handed jokes

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