Eight adult jokes

page views:1 Publication date:2022-07-17

Top 1:
I came to the cafeteria without my meal card. Seeing a girl who looked friendly, I said, "Beautiful lady, I don't have any cash. Can I pay you ten yuan with WeChat to buy me a meal?"... That's how I got her WeChat. Then, I won her over. Technology is true power!
Top 2
: The Little Match Girl: Uncle, buy a bag of matches. Uncle: No. The Little Match Girl: Grandpa, buy a bag of matches. Grandpa: No. The Little Match Girl: Auntie, buy a bag of matches. Auntie: Get out of the gas station!
Top 3:
Me: "Wife, go wash the dishes."
Wife: "Okay, husband."
Me: "Wife, mop the floor."
Wife: "Okay, husband."
Me: "Wife, give me a blowjob tonight."
Wife: "Okay, husband."
Me: "Okay, the boss wants the one that can talk."
Top 4:
Taking the bus to work, the bus was crowded. When we passed under the bridge, it was dark, and I felt someone touching my butt. I didn't pay much attention. After a while, someone started touching me again. I couldn't help but yell at that person: "If you're going to molest someone, at least find a woman! Look carefully, I'm a man!" The person paused for a second, then grabbed my clothes and said: "Don't you dare insult me, I'm a thief! "
Top 5:
During military training after school started, the instructor was counting. A big boy came out and said to the instructor: "Instructor, my back hurts. Can I ask for leave?" "Yes," the instructor replied. Just then, a guy said, "Instructor, my anus hurts. Can I ask for leave?" The instructor said to the two guys, "You're from the same dorm, right?"
Top 6
: Xiaoming was peeing in the toilet when Xiaoqiang pulled down his pants from behind. Then he ran away laughing. Xiaoming ran to the principal's office to complain. Xiaoming: Principal Wang, Xiaoqiang pulled down my pants... Principal Wang: Uh, let's talk this out. Pull your pants up first...
Top 7:
Just now at the gym, a guy asked the trainer: "If I want to attract pretty girls, which machine do I need to use?" The trainer replied: "The ATM outside..."
Top 8:
I just got beaten up by a big guy from Northeast China. I saw him looking miserable in a corner, so I went over and asked him why. He said his girlfriend thought he was ugly. As a man, could I tolerate that? I said, "What are you ugly about!" The big guy immediately slapped me, "What are you looking at?"

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Eight adult jokes

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