Women's Self-Protection Collection

The sexual associations evoked by Van Gogh's "Wheatfield with Crows" under dim lighting and the aroma of coffee.

Step 1: Clean the crime scene thoroughly, adjust the lighting to the extreme of ambiguity, immersing yourself in this
light to reach the climax.
Step 2: Select the CD and put it in the turntable. To avoid interrupting the experience, use the program button to select the desired
track and enjoy it all at once.
Step 3: Put on a comfortable bathrobe.
Step 4: Make coffee. Suggested method: three spoons of coffee powder, one spoon of sugar, and five spoons of creamer. Place it at the crime scene as soon as possible after preparation
.

Association 1: Focus your gaze 60cm from the "straw" and on the winding path. You'll find it's actually
as deep as a vagina, or perhaps a penis bent at an abnormal angle.
Judging by the angle of the bend, it was probably
slowly , breaking off at the front fifth and thrown into a swill ditch, alongside
a gnawed pig thigh bone.
Because the straw is golden, we can assume it's the penis of an Algerian
truck driver who, due to long hours of driving, had no time to clean it, resulting in
pubic lice—like crows on the straw pile. Observing the crows flapping their wings,
we can conclude that their growth is quite good, with ample nutrition.

Association 2: Adjust your gaze to 45cm from the image.
In the lower right corner of the picture, above the path next to the straw, there are a few green things, possibly weeds.
Keeping the distance from the image the same, adjust the angle to 37.2 degrees to the left. This evokes the image
of a man who, unable to bear the friction of teeth, ejaculated
and fled the crime scene, leaving behind a few drops of semen on the seventh step of the stairs.
Based on the experiment with the water clock, this man may have been
rubbed by the canines of some mammal for nearly one hour, nineteen minutes, and forty-one and a half seconds before fleeing
. He also likely emitted a 98-decibel scream, the result of his sixth ejaculation
after .
Because the green in the image is not pure, it may be semen mixed with red blood cells.

Third association: Keeping the distance at 45cm, but changing the angle to a 63-degree right tilt, focusing on the left side
of the image.
The weeds on both sides of the path resemble a pair of open female thighs, and the color of the path appears
to be a mixture of semen and menstrual blood flowing from the vulva. Judging from its consistency, this is semen ejaculated
on the second day of a woman's menstrual period and by a man who has not had sex or masturbated for four months, only experiencing nocturnal
emissions. The smell is the kind that would attract many desert hyenas and maggots to
lay their eggs . It won't be too intense.
From the angle of the spread thighs, these two animals have been going at it like crazy for about a week, and
have convulsed and foamed at the mouth several times. The clitoris is partially necrotic.

Association 4: Turn the picture upside down clockwise, and the deep blue sky will be on our right.
There are two clouds in the sky, one above the other, the upper one smaller and the lower one larger. Imagine it as
two open mouths of lesbians, and imagine they are using a double-headed vibrator.
The time is the second when they reach orgasm simultaneously. The deep blue sky is
the color of the bedroom walls, and the golden straw is the pasta spread out on the ground, and it's expired,
with some parasites crawling on it. The women's bodies are submerged in dough and
parasites , which linger near their anuses like impatient sperm trying
to burrow into the eggs.
The open mouths emit excited moans, one after another, like a carousel. Because of equality,
the intensity of the orgasm on the lesbians is the same.

Association 5: Invert the image, and the deep blue portion transforms into the Caribbean Sea—and it can only be
the Caribbean . The golden rice paddies now become a beach, with waves lapping against the sand, and the long red
dots are sea foam, the kind that mermaids transform into.
The green weeds in the image now represent men, and the red paths represent women. The men
are Cuban drug dealers, and the women are the 29-year-old daughter of a ramen shop owner, a solo Japanese tourist hoping for a romantic encounter
. Their bodies overlapped on the beach, the woman on top. Unable to achieve an erection
, she resorted to rubbing her clitoris with the man's testicles in an attempt to reach orgasm.
A crow, now a seabird, circled overhead, drawn by their movements.
The seabird 's calls affected the woman's pace. The man's testicles
split open to satisfy her, revealing bright red oval spheres. She continued her actions without
stopping . In the upper left corner,
a green weed was a venomous snake; if you looked closely, it was
slithering along the man's calf,
undecided unrelated comment: "Masturbation

is not suitable for a double bed . Listening to Prokofiev's cellos is an excellent time for masturbation, but only the first movement of the Opus. If you are troubled by not finding an ideal penis, you can refer to hrgiger.") The book contains images of figurative and non-figurative figures, those with and without condoms , alien heads, curved snakes, and skulls with mouths that look like they could be licked for a long time. Completely naked except for a nightgown, one can feel their own sensuality, especially the barely concealed legs and cleavage. It's best not to try Sharon Stone's leg-spreading style; the pleasure will be greatly diminished due to its lack of originality. A spring mattress might be more comfortable, but a hard bed can satisfy the desire to be raped. Open the blinds and invite the men who peek out the opposite window all day to watch. Having someone participate in masturbation, even just grooming pubic hair can cause flushing and swelling. If enough fluid has been secreted, apply a little to the area above the anus and imagine someone teasing it with their tongue. Use baby oil or Vaseline and your index finger to slowly insert it . First-timers may experience some discomfort, so use the more sensitive index finger more forcefully than the middle finger. The speed of thrusting depends on personal preference. After wiping the excrement off your fingers with a wet wipe, set it aside without getting up to throw it away immediately to avoid interrupting the sensation. After cleaning your fingers, lie down in a comfortable position and pinch your nipples to make them hard and erect, like the penis of the man opposite you. If you want someone to nibble on them, pinch them with your thumb and forefinger.

Spread and bend your legs, use your left hand to pry open your labia, and your right hand to knead your breasts. Imagine yourself
being watched by a man you've long wanted to rape; this will help with lubrication. Next, use your left hand and labia
to firmly grasp your clitoris and move it back and forth. If you feel aroused, you can let out soft breaths. If your vagina is still not wet,
use your right hand to moisten it with saliva and gently probe your clitoris. However, because the lubrication of the two fluids is different, and the level of comfort
is also different, try to avoid using saliva or artificial lubricants. Once you reach
the clitoral stimulation stage, it's best to rely on yourself; otherwise, you might develop a dependency or
a habit of needing a penis.

Stop using your left hand to pinch the clitoris and instead press down on the pubic bone. Use your right index finger with some lubricant to
stimulate the clitoris. Patiently wait for lubrication before continuing. Don't
neglect lubrication because you're reluctant to leave the clitoris; otherwise, dryness and excessive friction will cause stinging, defeating the purpose of masturbation.
Coordinate this with up-and-down hip movements, and you can also increase your breathing rate. If lying down becomes boring, try a knee-bent position
or standing with one leg straddling a chair. Stop when you're close to orgasm and silently recite the names of three men you want to have sex with
before continuing. Repeat this until you reach orgasm or feel like you're committing suicide. Shout freely during climax without feeling
guilty.
After calming your breathing, lick your index finger clean; don't waste this precious liquid, it's like a man's
semen . Memories of excessive caressing, kissing, and biting on a double bed can be disturbing and unsuitable for masturbation. The cafe named "

Tomato

" has nothing to do with tomatoes except for the tomato pattern on its exterior wall and signboard; even the tomato juice isn't authentic.
The bright red tomatoes on the white wall exude an ignorant allure; those hoping to feel the ripeness and fullness about to burst through the thin skin will be disappointed upon entering, until
they see the waitresses' crescent-shaped eyes. Each table is covered with a checkered tablecloth in a pastoral red, blue, and green pattern, the same checkered fabric appearing on the seat cushions.

"Isn't it too big?" a man with a large penis asked me. Unable to sense his intentions, I didn't react. His long face,
long body, and long penis didn't surprise me, only the excessively large glans looked somewhat frightening. I stroked it gently, slightly slower than usual.
It pondered why every man is different, and why this secret had to be kept hidden in his crotch for a lifetime. I mean, everyone can
see a person's hair, facial features, and fingers at a glance, but this is something you can never guess.

The music in the shop reminded me of canned tomato juice, which tasted bland and unappetizing. The waitress, her eyes crinkling into crescent moons, asked if I needed a lighter and
an ashtray. Perhaps I was too eager for her to bring out a tomato, because when the five-pointed star appeared, I had the urge to run out the door. The chef's salad was served on a blue-green
plate, and the tomato that finally appeared was a relief, so I immediately ate it all. The only downsides were the overly salty Thousand Island dressing and
the corn kernels on top. What I thought was a white slice of fish turned out to be cheese. My brain and mouth were already prepared to eat fish, but once it was in my mouth, I couldn't switch back
. So, I chewed half a slice of cheese with the mindset of eating fish. The rest, I refused to touch.

When I placed that enormous penis inside me, I was overwhelmed with a tremendous shock, a magnificent dizziness rising up, overcoming my previous tension and unease. The hardness
that erupted inside me completed the incompleteness of being a woman, and I wanted to cut off his penis to make up for God's oversight, but since I hadn't explained things to him, I
thought my sudden action would startle him. Different positions brought different pleasures, and he expressed the intensity of his desire through changes in speed, accompanied by
shouts, waves of trembling. At the moment of climax, he gave me his fluids, and I soaked the sheets with sweat.

The two ladies at the next table were discussing the source of the "nectar," and I drank a whole glass of ice water because I was so thirsty.
Four YSL remnants lay in the star-shaped ashtray, and an unused spoon on the table still gleamed. The fat chef wearing a scarf wandered around the restroom, and
the waitress with crescent-shaped eyes refilled my water glass for the third time and examined the cheese on the chef's salad. As I got up to pay the bill, I wanted to go home and shower.

Meanwhile, the man with the enormous penis was rushing off to work.

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