The secret my daughter and I can't tell even if we go to hell.

Self-reproach, guilt, ethical dilemmas, and the allure of pleasure and stimulation intertwined. We did things we shouldn't have done, and couldn't extricate ourselves from them, finding all sorts of reasons to justify it.

Yesterday was my 55th birthday. Only my daughter was home with me. My wife passed away two years ago, my son-in-law is serving in the military far away, and my granddaughter is in boarding school. My greatest pride in life is having a beautiful daughter who graduated from university; she is also my dearest. In the evening, my daughter cooked a few dishes, opened a bottle of dry red wine, and opened a bottle of Ningxia red wine for me. I can't drink alcohol; I usually only drink the health wine my daughter buys, and sometimes a little dry red wine. I drank one glass of Ningxia red and two glasses of dry red wine, and my daughter also drank quite a bit. I felt a little dizzy and sleepy, so I went back to my room to sleep.

Later, my daughter came over and asked if I was okay. I said I was fine and went to bed early. I woke up at 2 a.m., still half-asleep, and felt someone hugging me. I shivered and immediately became fully awake. There was no one else at home; my daughter must have drunk too much and was lying there. I quickly turned on the bedside lamp and woke her up, saying, "You've had too much to drink. Go sleep at your place." My daughter said, "I haven't slept at all. I'm worried you'll get sick if you drink too much." I said, "Then go sleep at my place." My daughter jokingly said, "I'm not going. Let's see what you can do to me." I sat up and said, "If you won't leave, I will." My daughter turned off the bedside lamp, grabbed my neck, and pushed me back onto the bed, saying, "Can't you just leave?" I had no choice but to say, "Fine, I won't leave." I said, "Then keep Dad company and chat with him." My daughter whispered in my ear, "Dad, I love you. Do you love me?" I said, "Yes, I do." My daughter said, "Then love me well." At this moment, my daughter pressed her large body against mine and whispered in my ear, "Dad, please take me. This is the best birthday gift I can give you."

I thought that my daughter and son-in-law had been living apart for a long time, and my daughter was probably too lonely. I said, "I didn't hear what you were saying." "If you want to be with someone else, Dad knows you're suffering." My daughter said, "I don't like everything. There are only two men in my life, a husband and a father. No one else has a place in my heart. I've wanted to give myself to you since I was 16, but I didn't dare. I was afraid you would scold me, and I was afraid of my mother. Now I'm older, my mother is gone, and Feng is gone too. What are you afraid of, Dad?" I was telling the truth, my brain can no longer control my lower body. I said, "Do you know, this is called incest." My daughter said, "This is called a double marriage. Dad, no one will know." At this moment, my daughter turned on the bedside lamp, lifted the blanket, and two naked bodies were intertwined under the light. My daughter used her hands to pull down my underwear, and my thing was standing straight up. My daughter also took off her panties and threw away her bra, pressing her two breasts against my mouth. "Dad, don't you want me?" I said no. My daughter said she didn't believe me. "Dad, look how hard it is." I said I wanted to, but I couldn't do it.

My daughter turned off the bedside lamp and climbed on top of me, kissing me passionately. I couldn't control myself anymore; my 185-pound body pressed her down, kissing her breasts. Then, she casually turned the bedside lamp back on. I told her to turn it off, but she said she wanted to see how I would kiss her. I said, "Dad can't control himself either, but aren't you worried about getting pregnant? There are a few old condoms in the drawer." She said, "No need. I want to give myself to you completely; it's a safe period now." Facing my 30-year-old daughter, a beautiful and alluring young woman, I revealed my penis. My daughter said shyly, "Dad, I want to put a pillow under me, is that okay?" I said, "Sure," and grabbed a pillow, placing it under her buttocks. I inserted my penis. My daughter said, "I see, it's in! Dad, lift your body a little, I want to see you fuck me." I thrust wildly, saying, "Can you see it?" My daughter said, "Yes." I said, "See what?" My daughter said, "Dad is fucking me."

My daughter writhed, crying out, "Daddy, it feels so good! Fuck me to death! Fuck me to death!" I gripped her breasts with both hands, my 185-pound body slamming against her mound. Her legs straightened, and I thrust even more wildly, a warm stream shooting out. Everything stopped. My daughter said, "Daddy, you're amazing! I love you so much! You're even better than Feng! He only lasts 10 minutes at most, but I checked the clock on the wall, and we lasted over 23 minutes!" I said, "It's all thanks to following your advice to exercise every morning and evening, and drinking your health tonics. That's why I have such a great body." I said, "We did something we shouldn't have done. How will we face each other afterward?" My daughter said, "You're still my dad, and I'm still your daughter. You wouldn't know who Dad is, but I've always been very attached to you, though others can't tell." I said, "Daddy, shouldn't you find another woman? Otherwise, this wouldn't have happened." My daughter said, "I don't want anyone else to take advantage of my dad!"

I said, "Actually, Daddy also wants it to be just the two of us at home." When you were 16, it was raining heavily and there was thunder. You were afraid to sleep in the same bed as your father. Your mother was away on a business trip. Your father wanted to do that, but he just thought he couldn't. If you were his stepdaughter, your father would have done it long ago. The daughter said: Dad, you are so bad. Actually, my fear at the time was fake. There was thunder often when my mother was at home. Letting you sleep together was just an excuse. I said: Seeing how clingy you are to me every day, how could your father not see it? The daughter said: If we had done it then, I would hate you for the rest of my life. It means you are not close to me at all. I said: What about now? The daughter said: Now I am older, I am married and have children. Feng is not around. I have nothing to worry about.

(2)

It is not a fantasy or a novel. It is real. My guilt and self-blame were intertwined with pleasure and happiness. I leaned towards the latter. The breakthrough in the father-daughter relationship in that instant determined that we could never go back to the way things were. I knew before that this kind of thing was bound to happen. My daughter was too clingy to me and admired me a lot. My family is at least middle class in this small coastal city. My daughter is attracted to older, more mature men and has a deep-seated father complex; her husband is 12 years older than her. She

developed those complicated feelings for me around the age of 14. I remember one summer night when she was 16, during a violent storm with thunder and lightning. Her mother was away studying in Jinan, and my daughter, saying she was scared, insisted on sleeping in the same bed with me, wrapped in a sheet, and wanted me to hold her. I didn't sleep at all that night, pretending to be sound asleep. My daughter thought I was really asleep and gently moved me around, using the lightning to lift the sheet and look at my penis. I pretended to be asleep, but I was already hard and wet, and my mind was desperately trying to control it. In the end, nothing happened. I was afraid it would leave a lasting trauma on her life, since she's still so young. It's a lie to say I didn't want that; I just didn't want to hurt my daughter.

Now my daughter is 30, turning 31 next year. She's a mother of a 7-year-old, 166cm tall, and very beautiful. In our small town, she's considered one of the most beautiful women. On the night of my 55th birthday, my daughter gave me that special gift in that way. No matter what, my daughter's love for me is still sincere, even if it is unconventional. I can't resist it. Actually, I want it too, because my daughter is 30 years old and she can take responsibility for what she does. Now my daughter seems to have never had anything happen. Every morning she accompanies me to run on the beach, and every evening she accompanies me to walk on the beach. On weekends, I accompany her to the supermarket. Wherever we go, we attract envious glances. We are like a loving father and daughter. Sometimes at night, when we are deeply in love during the day, my daughter calls out "Dad... Dad..." and I am afraid that others will hear it. People may say that this is incest. But we are really sexually happy and excited. The feeling of being even closer is so wonderful! I can only confide in her here.

(3)

Ten days have passed in a flash. The weekend has arrived again. In the afternoon, I accompanied my daughter to the supermarket. We came back after 5 o'clock. My daughter was busy in the kitchen. Today, I will eat my daughter's good braised fish again. Soon, the fish and several plates of green vegetables were served. Dinner began. As usual, I had a little Ningxia Red wine, and my daughter had half a glass. I said, "My granddaughter will be back next weekend. Staying at school for half a month is too long." My daughter said, "It'll be soon. The holidays are in a few days. Dad, it's too cold and windy tonight, but we still want to go for a walk on the beach." I said, "Of course we have to go. It's been a habit for decades. If we don't walk for a day, I feel like something's missing." My daughter said, "Then I'll go with you. It'll be good for losing some weight."

I said, "Go ahead if you're not afraid of the cold!" Soon we arrived at the beach. We walked south along the seaside path. The wind was strong today, and the waves kept crashing against the shore, splashing up and freezing into a thick layer of ice. We were the only two walking along the entire seaside path, with only a few cars occasionally passing by on the nearby seaside road. My daughter held my arm and leaned against me. Although my daughter often walks with me at night, today I felt a sense of upheaval. For the past ten days, I felt like I was living in a dream, and now I'm finally back to reality. We will never return to that pure, unattainable kind of kinship. My daughter asked me, "Dad, what are you thinking about so deeply today?" I said, "Nothing."

My daughter said: Can you hide it from me? Dad, I know what you're thinking. It's so late today. Blame your daughter if you have to. I said: Dad doesn't blame you. My daughter said: Dad, I really love you. I will always be your good daughter. After walking for a while, we walked back. It took us one hour and ten minutes to walk. We got home at 8:50. I watched a financial program on CCTV2 for a while. My daughter was online. She came over and said: Dad, you go to sleep first. I'll go online for a while. I said: Don't stay up too late. I went to bed at 10 o'clock and didn't wake up until almost 8 o'clock the next day.

(4)

After walking on the beach on Sunday, I turned on CCTV1 to watch a TV series. My daughter was online. My daughter called from the study: Dad, the hot water is ready. The TV series will end at 9:30. Go take a shower. You haven't showered for several days. I'll shower first and then you can shower. I said: Okay! I realized that I hadn't showered for several days without realizing it. My daughter came out of the shower after the TV series ended. She said, "Dad, wait a minute, the water's not quite hot yet. I'll watch TV with you for a bit." She sat down beside me wrapped in a towel, her head resting against me, her long, wet hair clinging to my chest.

She said, "I often think back to when we were little, every night you'd hold me and Mom while we watched TV. It was so wonderful." My thoughts drifted back to those times. The evening news announced the time; it was 10 pm. I went to take a shower. The bathroom was nice and warm with the heater and radiator. Lying in the big bathtub was so comfortable; I didn't want to move and just wanted to sleep. My daughter called from outside, "Dad, let me scrub your back." I said, "No need." She said, "Really? If you don't let me scrub your back, I'll scrub it for you."

She went into the bathroom wrapped in a towel. I had my back to her, but I saw her scrubbing her back vigorously in the large mirror opposite me. She said, "It's so dirty! Can't you not scrub my back?" Perhaps finding it in the way, she took off the towel, leaving her only in her underwear and bra. The three lights in the bathroom heater were so bright; I could see everything clearly in the mirror opposite. Daughter: Dad, I'm done scrubbing. Let me rinse you off with the showerhead. (After rinsing) Daughter: Dad, stand up, let me wipe your back. Daughter: (Dried, Dad) I saw in the mirror that my daughter was naturally hugging my neck from behind, looking blissfully happy. Daughter: Dad, look down in the mirror. There it was, my thing, standing there. Daughter: (Whispering in my ear) Dad, you're thinking bad things again.

She then grabbed my thing from behind. Daughter: Let's go to hell! I turned around and picked up my daughter, who was about 166cm tall and weighed around 100 pounds. Daughter: Dad, I want to be here. I sat on the edge of the bathroom. Yanzi lay in my arms. I pulled down her panties, ripped off her bra, kissed her two firm breasts, and kissed her pubic area, playing with her pubic hair. Yanzi also kissed my thing. We hugged each other, and my thing slid into her pubic hair. Yan: I want to come from behind. She crawled on the edge of the bathtub, raised her buttocks, and put her hands into the bathtub. I grabbed two steamed buns with both hands and entered that little grass from behind. Yan moaned comfortably. I was using all my strength to thrust into that little grass.

Yan and I both looked at the big mirror in front of us. Yan: I saw how you kissed me. It felt so good. Harder. Me: I can't take it anymore. Yan: I want more. I made a final sprint. We both collapsed there.

The secret that my daughter and I can only take to hell (a true story) (5) I was half-awake and half-asleep.

I vaguely felt someone beside me. My subconscious thought was my wife. The light coming through the curtains pulled me back to reality. My beloved daughter went to another world two years ago. It must be my daughter Yanzi. I went to bed at 10 o'clock yesterday and have been sleeping until now. I don't know when Yan will come. I looked at my watch. It was 5 o'clock. There were still two o'clock before my 7 o'clock exercise. As usual, I was thinking about how to operate the stock market today. I have been waking up at this time every day for 16 years to think. I remembered that I had basically gone all-in two months ago, and I felt both fortunate and relieved about the recent market crash. Although most of my funds are in a private placement mainly held by relatives, I still feel the pressure. Most of my funds are currently invested in IPOs. With the recent crash, it's time to act again in the next few trading days before the Lunar New Year.

My darling daughter Yan is awake. "Yan, Daddy, aren't you going to sleep?" I said. "You're awake at this hour? When were you coming over last night?" Yan replied, "A little after 11. I saw you were sleeping soundly, so I came over with my blanket." Yan said, "Daddy, it's only 6:10 now, let's chat for a bit." Yan playfully burrowed into my blanket, and I could only pretend to passively accept it. Facing Yan's long legs, her shapely figure, her fair skin, her two firm breasts that seemed ready to burst out at any moment, her long hair, and her pretty, doll-like face like a girl in her early twenties, I couldn't refuse, I couldn't resist. It felt like I was back when I was dating Yan. Actually, Yan was considered a beauty in our time, but Yan was taller and prettier than her. Yan and I kissed again. I pulled down Yan's underwear from behind with both hands. The underwear was too tight, clinging to her thighs. I held Yan's round, firm little bottom with both hands, my underwear bulging high, my penis pressing against the slightly raised mound of Yan's white underwear. This was my hand tearing at the half-pulled-down underwear. Yan finally let go of me. Yan: "Dad, let's go tonight. I'm afraid you'll be too tired. I want you to live a few more days." Yan quickly got out of bed, ready to go to work.

I said: "Take your passbook and transfer 5,000 yuan to your uncle from your bank. Your uncle said he needs money for the New Year. Dayilong won the lottery on the 30th. We won three prizes, so transfer the money to him today. We can calculate the details later after we sell the stock. Make sure it's a transfer, and keep the receipt as proof." Yan: "You're so professional, Dad. I'm going to work!" Yan went downstairs. I saw Yan open the car door with a flourish from the window. The car drove out of the community gate and onto Guanhai Road. I watched Yan's car gradually disappear into the distance.

The Secret My Daughter and I Can Only Take to Hell (Factual Serial) (6)

The sea has changed from the fierce winds of the past few days. Waves crash against the soft sand, making a harmonious murmur. The lights of thousands of homes are on the west side of the sea-viewing road, and the sound of ship whistles can be heard from the sea. It seems so peaceful and leisurely. Although this is one of the earliest coastal development cities, it is still less noisy than the coastal cities in the south. Now, at 7 pm in winter, there is little smoke on the streets and by the sea. My daughter Yan and I are taking a walk along the seaside path. Not far away, the scene that appears almost every day appears again: a child is carrying a girl on his back. They seem to be students from a nearby college. The two gradually move away from our sight. Yan: Dad, you used to carry me and me when we went for walks. We would walk for a long, long time. Even if we carried each other, you could never carry us. We could only walk about ten steps at most.

I said that I was only about 160 cm tall back then. Now Dad is almost 185 cm tall. Daughter Yan: But you don't look fat at all, you can't tell at all. It seems like all your daily exercise has paid off. Dad, let me carry you and see how far you can go. I said, maybe five steps at most. Yan really wanted to carry me, but I said, "Forget it, I'm so old, what would I look like if people saw me like that?" Yan: "Then carry me." I said, "Okay." Yan: "How far?" I said, "500 meters." I carried Yan forward, and she kept wanting to get down, saying she was afraid I'd get tired. I said, "Let me show you what Dad is capable of." I carried Yan for a long way before putting her down. At 9 o'clock, we returned to our home on Guanhai Road. I was watching the news on TV, and Yan came over to watch TV with me. Yan, her face slightly flushed, sat on my lap a little shyly, and I hugged her small waist from behind.

The TV was reporting that Hubei and Hunan were experiencing heavy snow, and 100,000 soldiers were working to clear the snow and ice. I suddenly remembered something and asked Yan if she wasn't supposed to come home for the Chinese New Year this year. Yan: "This afternoon they said they couldn't come back. The army is working on snow removal, and the forecast for the next few days is for more heavy snow. They'll come back during the first month of the lunar calendar." I said our little princess should have a holiday. Yan said, "I'll pick her up on Saturday morning. I can't be too clingy with you when Qianqian comes back." Yan stood up, turned around, and sat on my lap again, her legs on the sofa. We intertwined, her firm breasts pressed against my front. Yan leaned back, and we kissed passionately for a long time. I picked Yan up and carried her to the bedroom, placing her on the large bed. We both quickly took off our clothes, ending up in our underwear. We hugged each other before we could even take them off.

We both lay on the bed, our white bodies rolling and kissing under the soft light. I pulled off Yan's and my underwear, and climbed onto Yan's long, white legs. Yan was ecstatic, her eyes half-closed. Yan grabbed a pillow from the side, and I casually placed it under her round, firm buttocks, making her mound even more prominent. This way, Yan and I could clearly see how my penis entered her anus. Yan and I watched as my penis entered her anus. Yan watched greedily as my penis went in and out of her anus. T was pounding heavily against that small hill, the impact of our lower abdomens making a slapping sound. It felt like the end of the world was coming for Yan and me; we were both going crazy.

The secret my daughter and I can only take to hell (a true story series) (7)

Returning from the beach, as soon as I entered the community gate, I saw the soft light from my fifth-floor window. My darling daughter must be busy preparing dinner. I had just settled down on the sofa when my daughter, Yan, quickly brought the food up. We ate and chatted. Yan: "Dad, I bought you a suit today. Try it on after dinner, and if it doesn't fit, you can exchange it tomorrow. I bought it based on your height of 1.80 meters, so it should be about right." I said, "I'm getting old, why buy these things?" Yan: "Who said you're old? The latest saying is 50 or 60 is middle age." After dinner, Yan turned on the hallway light and had me try it on in front of the large floor-length mirror on the wall. Yan: "Dad, guess what brand I bought? They advertise it all the time on CCTV."

I said, "Yageer. Shanshan." Yan said no, "Meierya, Baoxiniao." Later, I mentioned many brands, but Yan said no to each one. Finally, Yan told me: "Xinlang Xinuer, a well-known local brand. Dad, most importantly, it comes with two pairs of pants, so you don't have to worry about the shirt being good while the pants are already worn out." I tried on the black striped suit and it fit well. I looked in the mirror and felt pretty good. I joked, "I'm not the groom, and I don't have a bride." Yan hugged my neck from behind and playfully said, "I am your bride."

I said, "You're talking nonsense again." Yan said, "Dad, do you know? There are some popular novels online where the daughter is the father's past life." I asked how much the suit cost, and Yan said, "Not much, a little over 1700." I said, "What should I get you for Chinese New Year, Dad?" Yan said, "Nothing." I said, "I planned to earn money for Chinese New Year to buy you a mid-range car, but I only made half the money. The day before yesterday, I sold all 4000 shares of Dali Long at 21.50, making 17 yuan per share, for a total profit of 34,000 yuan. But today, 3000 shares of China Coal only make 5 yuan per share. I won't sell until it's under 30 yuan, so I bought another 8000 shares of China Coal at 21.60 today." Yan said coquettishly, "Dad, write a blank check." I said, "Dad, you're my only child. Who else would I spend money on? Let's get a new car before the New Year."

Yan laughed and said, "Dad, I'm just kidding. My car is still in its best condition, just broken in. I'll get a new one in a couple of years." Yan said worriedly, "Dad, Qianqian, our little princess, is on holiday tomorrow. I can't be too clingy with you." I said, "We'll still be the same as before in front of Qianqian. Yan, go to sleep early, you have to pick her up tomorrow morning." Yan hugged me shyly and whispered in my ear, "Dad, I don't want to sleep now. Let's listen to some music and dance." I said, "Okay!" In the living room, I wrapped my arms around Yan's small waist and moved gently to the soft music. Yan's two firm breasts pressed against my chest, her arms around my neck, and she leaned on my shoulder. I stared at Yan's beautiful, innocent face, and my penis hardened, pressing against her pubic area. We moved to the bedroom to the music.

My daughter and I's secret that can only be taken to hell (a true story series) (8) I'm

a little tired tonight, but my mind is still wide awake, repeating the joy and warmth of family life from the daytime. My granddaughter Qianqian's return has brought a rare new look to this spacious house. Qianqian's English level impressed my daughter Yan and me. Although I don't understand foreign languages, I can tell from Yan's expression and affirmation. It seems that it was worth it for us to send Qianqian to a private school. At this moment, lying in bed, I'm dreaming about where Qianqian will study abroad, whether it's Yale or Cambridge, etc. The more I think about it, the less sleepy I feel. At 10 o'clock, as usual, I should go online to browse the financial news that will be released today and tomorrow, and answer some questions from friends. I never read stock market commentary. Today I wanted to make an exception and go to bed early, but I really couldn't fall asleep.

I had no choice but to go to the study to go online. I opened QQ and looked at my friends' messages. The little icon at the bottom of QQ was flashing. It turned out that my daughter Yan was contacting me. Yan went to university and took a family visit to Hubei. We have been communicating online. I clicked on the message Yan sent. Yan: Dad, I saw the study light was on and I know you're online. Go to sleep early. Me: In a bit, you go to sleep. Yan: I can't sleep. Me: Qianqian's asleep. Yan: Asleep. Yan: I'm not used to sleeping and can't fall asleep. I'll come over later.

Me: Are you crazy? You forgot our promise. Yan: I remember. This bottom line won't be broken. I just really want you to hold me while I sleep. Me: There's plenty of time in the future, as long as you're willing. Yan: Of course I'm willing. Yan: Qianqian will go back to school in a month, and then she'll go to university, and maybe even study abroad. Me: Qianqian must study abroad in the future. Yan: That's all I can hope for in my life. I'm a technical official, I might not retire until I'm 60, and maybe I'll have to work for a few more years after 60. Me: You regret it? Yan: A little before, but not now. Me: Why? Yan: Knowing it's a consultant. Yan: She called and said she'd be back in January. Me: Okay then. We can get together again. Yan: I'm a little unfamiliar with him and don't know how to face him.

Me: After all, he's your husband and Qianqian's father. And he's an excellent soldier. Yan: Then I'll try my best. Yan: When we come back, we'll go back to his hometown in Muping to live. Anyway, it's not too far from work. Me: Doesn't he live at our house every year? Yan: She makes me go back every year. Let's go back this year. Yan: I don't want to live at our house. It feels a little awkward. Me: Is that so? Yan: You're pretending to be confused again. Yan: Dad, I can't let you go. It's the kind of affection that comes in a different sense. Me: Yan, Dad feels the same way as you. But Dad's principle is not to sacrifice your family. Me: I love you, Yan. Don't think so much. Go to sleep early. Yan: Okay. Me: Good night! Yan: Good night!

(9)

On the morning of the 30th of the lunar year, the sky still fell a thin layer of snow. The sun jumped out from the sea. The sea was vast and the earth was covered in red and white. It really felt like the New Year. As the sun rose higher, a thin layer of snow slowly melted away. I ran and walked along the beach, feeling truly refreshed and invigorated. A soft yellow Chevrolet pulled up beside me, honking its horn. I was startled to see my daughter, Yan, emerge from the car. Yan was wearing a tight-fitting black mink coat and black camel hair trousers, with black boots on her feet. Her 166cm frame appeared even taller, and a small woven red and yellow hat added to her charm. Yan walked quickly towards me. "Dad, I'll walk with you." I said, "Don't you have to work?" Yan replied, "I have a holiday on the 30th."

We walked for a while and then turned back. Yan said, "Dad, you're free today, why don't you drive me to the beach?" I asked, "Where to?" Yan said, "Just drive along the coast." I said, "Okay." I turned around and drove north along the coast, following the direction Yan had come from, and soon entered the development zone. Yan said, "Dad, our house in the development zone hasn't been rented out yet." I said no, the rent is too low, let it stay vacant. I bought it for a little over 800, and I can still sell it immediately for 4000. Yan: Let's go take a look. I said it's been a long time since I've looked at houses, let's go take a look.

I bought this house in the early 1990s, not long after the development zone was established. Now, the development zone is full of modern buildings along the sea, and although my house is also a sea view house, it still seems a bit outdated, but on the other hand, it reflects the mark of the times and the homeowner's foresight. My house faces south, I'm on the fourth floor on the east side, there are six floors in total, and the east-facing window faces the sea directly. Our car drove into the community, and like the streets, there were hardly any people. Most of the people here are from the surrounding areas, and they've all gone home for the New Year. Yan and I went into the room, and the sight of the house brought back memories of the past. Yan opened the curtains on the east side of her room and then turned on the air conditioner.

I looked at the sea, and Yan hugged my neck from behind and said: Dad, let's sit on the bed and look at the sea. I said okay. Yan and I sat on the bed. Yan took off her mink coat and leaned against me. Yan grabbed my breasts with both hands and placed them on her chest. Yan murmured, "Dad, hug me like you did when I was little." I instinctively hugged Yan. Yan unbuttoned her shirt, and her pink bra covered her two firm breasts. Yan murmured, "Dad, take all my clothes off." I slowly undressed Yan without thinking. My mind went blank, and I lay stiffly on the bed.

Yan: "Dad, let me take your clothes off." She quickly stripped me naked, and my thing was standing there. Yan stroked me and said, "Dad, your flesh is so soft, you can't even press it down. It's amazing!" I drew the curtains, and Yan opened them again. Yan: "There are no buildings in front of us, no one can see us." At this moment, the warm winter sun shone on us.

(10) Heartfelt Confession

Whether you believe it or not, whether you curse it or not, whether you understand it or not, I will continue writing in this virtual space, and I can only speak here. I reiterate that 99% of the information mentioned in this article is based on nicknames and addresses used by the parties involved, otherwise people would make assumptions. I used to write a lot about finance, and I may have been too blunt here. That's my background. Years ago, Yan's mother passed away from a disease that is very harmful to women. Later, I also had a brief period of being a woman, but girls born in the 80s are too selfish and too tired. My daughter didn't explicitly object at the time, but she didn't support me either. My daughter and I later tacitly felt that no other woman could enter our lives.

This stemmed from my daughter's feelings for me, her admiration for me, my careful planning for her career and life, the happy environment I created for her, and my love for her. It was inevitable that Yan and I would cross the line from father to daughter. Yan has a deep Oedipus complex, and I love her very much. We had many opportunities to have sex before. I don't want to be a hypocrite. Facing Yan, a beautiful girl who doesn't even need to offer a hint, I really want her. But I try my best to control myself from doing so. I don't want to leave a shadow on her. I don't want my daughter to look down on me. My birthday might be an opportunity for Yan, but I would never take the initiative. I accepted that feeling because Yan has grown up. She will be 31 years old in 2008. I think Yan's feelings on my birthday were not just a momentary impulse. Since that day when Yan and I broke through the father-daughter relationship, we have been more exciting than other men and women. The way she calls me "Dad" makes me feel both pity and excitement. The feeling of being even closer is unforgettable. Yan is God's daughter and angel. I want to be close to her for 20 years! I'll write "20 years" here.

(11) Valentine's Day

, February 14th. With the rise in temperature, this Western holiday has also gained warmth and atmosphere. I took a walk on the beach in the morning and saw several young men and women holding roses, which added to the romance and charm of the coast. Before I knew it, it was time to go back. Turning around, I saw a cream-colored Chevrolet drive onto the seaside promenade and head towards me. I knew it was Yan looking for me. I got in the car without asking Yan where we were going, and Yan didn't say we were heading north, even though we both knew where we were going. Finally, Yan broke the silence, "Dad, do you know what holiday it is today, the eighth day of the lunar month?" I said, "Even if your dad is out of touch, he can't possibly not know it's Valentine's Day on February 14th." Yan said, "I was just teasing you."

Yan stopped at a flower shop by the roadside and playfully said, "Dad, buy me a rose." I joked, "It's Valentine's Day, and nobody's giving me flowers." Yan pretended to be very serious and said, "A daughter is her father's lover from a past life. That's what everyone says online. A daughter can't do without a rose from her father." It seemed that his daughter had no choice but to get out of the car to buy the rose. Yan wanted to get out with me, but I persuaded her to stay back; it was better to keep it private. I hurriedly left the flower shop with the rose and got into the car. Yan smiled contentedly and placed the rose under the windshield, where it looked beautiful in the sunlight. We arrived at our home in the development zone shortly after. We closed the door and hugged each other without thinking. Yan said, "We're finally free!"

I picked Yan up and placed her on her old bed. Yan drew back the curtains, and warm sunlight streamed into her bed. Yan said lazily, "Dad, I touched the radiator under the window just now, and it's not very hot. Turn on the air conditioner. I have my laptop in my bag; you can use it later." Yan was so thoughtful. I turned on the air conditioner and then the water heater, then put the laptop on the bed, opened Neptune, and Yan and I lay on the bed watching the stock price of China Coal. Yesterday, I bought several thousand shares at 21.56. Today, after a brief dip at the opening, it went straight up a little over a dollar, almost making a profit. I quickly sold them. This stock market and individual stocks... 2008 was like a monkey market; it came down again in a minute. I turned off the computer. Yan asked, puzzled, "Aren't you going to watch anymore?" I said, "Dad basically cleared out all our family and relatives' stocks two months ago. Now we're only doing IPOs and short-term trading in stocks like China Coal." Yan said lazily, "Dad, I'm a little sleepy. I haven't been sleeping well these past ten days since Qianqian came back. I'm used to you holding me while I sleep. Dad, can you hold me while I take a hot shower?"

As she spoke, Yan lay down and took off her bra. I helped her unhook the back of her bra, and it slipped down, revealing her two firm, perfectly sized breasts. I helped Yan take off her panties. I carried Yan to the bathroom. A few minutes later, Yan called from inside, "Dad, I'm done showering!" I went in and picked Yan up. Yan closed her eyes, wrapped her arms around my neck, and murmured, "Dad, you should shower too." I put Yan on the bed and showered for three minutes.

I put on a long bath towel and got into bed. Yan suddenly stood up and pulled off my towel. We stood there naked, embracing each other. I cupped Yan's face in my hands and kissed her passionately. Yan stopped moving, closed her eyes, and let me kiss her. Yan slumped down and whispered to me, "Dad, I'm tired." I sat on the bed with Yan on my lap, facing me, kissing her. Yan leaned back, my right hand supporting her waist, my left hand cupping her breast, my mouth sucking on her nipple, kissing her breasts repeatedly. Yan's juices flowed onto my thighs. I released my right hand, and Yan lay down between my legs, her most private area exposed to the sunlight. I parted her legs, looking at it; a little bit of fluid was flowing out. I grabbed Yan's old teddy bear and placed it under her bottom, raising her private area higher, closer to my eyes and mouth. I parted her legs and kissed her there with my mouth and tongue. Yan kept writhing, moaning softly. I stopped kissing; there was too much fluid there. I carried Yan to the bedside. Standing on the floor, I held Yan's two shapely thighs in each hand, her long calves wrapped around my waist. I spread her legs as wide as possible, and my penis entered her small patch of dark grass. I thrust in and out, my arms opening and closing, pounding against her. The sounds of her thighs hitting each other were harmonious and rhythmic. Yan kept crying out, "Dad, it feels so good! Is it me, Dad?" I heard a mixture of pity and excitement in her voice, and I thrust in and out even harder.

After about 30 minutes, Yan and I made our final thrusts. We lay on the bed for a while, then went to the bathroom to shower. It was 11:30. Yan said, "Dad, let's eat something simple. I have some pastries and sausages in my bag." I asked, "What about Qianqian?" Yan said, "I prepared some for her when I left this morning." Yan and I ate a little something. Then I carried Yan to bed. Yan said, "Dad, I'm sleepy, can you hold me and let me sleep for a while? I have to go to work at the bank at 2:30." Yan set the time on her phone. I held Yan and fell into a deep sleep.

(12) Untitled

Tonight, I accidentally turned on CCTV5 and watched half of a football match. Actually, the ending was already predetermined, but I still watched it to the end. What was gratifying was that Yan and Qianqian accompanied me to watch the game. Especially when Qianqian came back, she brought life to this spacious and dull room. Every night around 8:30, the kiss goodbye with Qianqian before going to sleep was indispensable and was also the warmest moment for the whole family. At 9 o'clock, I turned on CCTV2 to check the financial news. Yan told me, "Dad, the oil price has gone up to 100 again. One of my colleagues bought PetroChina shares at 44 and is still stuck.

Will it fall further?" I said self-deprecatingly, "Today, your dad saw injustice and helped out. He bought 6,000 shares at 24.16 at the end of the day." Yan said, "Dad, I heard from my colleague that we can only buy when it falls below 20." I said it's possible, but the probability is very small. Even if it breaks 20, it will only be for a moment. In the long run, it's still worth holding. Yan asked why. I patiently explained to Yan, letting her know the deeper aspects of the stock market. After all, my wealth still needs to be left to Yan; it's not good if she can't manage it. I gave a few examples: first, oil prices are constantly hitting new highs, and the US dollar is constantly depreciating; second, stock index futures are about to be launched. Without PetroChina, it's like not having nuclear weapons. Don't think that institutions have set a trap at 48; trying to manipulate retail investors at 24 is just being overly clever and foolish. I asked Yan if she knew about the 1997 Asian financial crisis.

Yan said she was a sophomore in college, and her teacher asked each of us to write an analysis article. I said it was a guy named Soros who stirred up trouble in Hong Kong, manipulating the stock market, stock index futures, and exchange rates by using HSBC, the largest weighted stock in the Hang Seng Index. If it weren't for Tsarist Trump using mainland funds, Hong Kong would have been completely plundered. If stock index futures are launched tomorrow, harming PetroChina retail investors and institutions that are clamoring that PetroChina should only be invested in below 20, PetroChina will have at least three consecutive limit-up days. Yan said that if stock index futures are launched later, wouldn't institutions still try to drive the price down to 20? I said that institutions currently hold very few PetroChina shares. Even if the price drops to 20, their holdings of PetroChina would be negligible. Once the stock index futures are launched, PetroChina will only rise unilaterally. Those trying to manipulate retail investors will only be able to watch helplessly. Thirdly, the performance is good. Despite the manipulation by the speculators, a performance of nearly 1 yuan is still quite good.

There are still many oil fields overseas. I told Yan that these three points alone made it worthwhile to buy around 24. Yan enjoyed listening, and of course, I enjoyed talking too; the stock market is where I made my fortune. Yan had known some things before, but never discussed them in such depth as today. Later, I also told Yan about some stock selection methods and my investment experience. I entered the stock market in 1992 with 10,000 yuan. Before that, I speculated in government bonds; back then, 100 yuan could almost yield 180 yuan in three years. At that time, I had a job and went to the stock market, but I didn't have the courage of Yang Baiwan to leave his job—I was too conservative. However, I still made some gains in the stock market.

My stock selection principle is to always choose industry leaders and second-tier leaders, mainly focusing on the chairman of the board. From 1999 to 2000, I heavily invested in Harbin Pharmaceutical Group (600664), buying it from 6 yuan to 24 yuan. A month later, it was 32 yuan, meaning I missed out on 8 yuan. I felt I had overextended myself; let others profit from any further rise. Later, I stopped paying attention to Harbin Pharmaceutical Group because its founder, Liu Cunzhou, had passed away. It seems my judgment was correct; the company has been slowly declining. I invested in Shuanghui Development (000895) from 2001 to 2003, starting at 9.50 yuan, and reaped considerable profits. My heavy investment was based on my confidence in Wan Long, the 60-something-year-old "godfather" of Shuanghui. From 2004 to 2007, I held a large position in Lutai Textile (000726), selling it at 27 yuan after it rose from 6 yuan, only to see it rise to 48 yuan in a month (before ex-rights). My reason for buying 000726 was my confidence in Liu Shizhen, the 67-year-old "godfather" of Lutai. I believe that when choosing stocks, it's crucial to select a good chairman. Similarly, why did Xingfu Industry, another leading listed company in the textile industry, fail? It's long gone now. Zhou Zuoliang, a 1.47-meter-tall disabled man, ruined Xingfu, but Xingfu Real Estate in Wuhan did. The so-called booming taxi industry is a typical example of a bad guy with a halo.

Another example is Lantian, which boasts about buying over 2 billion yuan worth of wild lotus root juice annually. I've checked many supermarkets and there's no product there at all. They only distribute large amounts of stock every year, never paying cash dividends. Less than two years ago, I told people in the industry that Lantian had problems! Zhai Zhaoyu (phonetic) later sent bullets to Liu Shuwei, a female professor at the University of Finance and Economics who exposed Lantian. Liu is also my daughter Yan's teacher at the university. With such a leader, you're guaranteed to lose money if you invest in such a company. I also told Yan that market research is very important. The simplest way is to go to the supermarket. I've intentionally and unintentionally visited several supermarkets in major cities before, researching Shuanghui (000895). I went to these supermarkets every day for several days in a row. Just observe the products for a while during peak hours, and you'll know how good they are. Later, the sales staff at the Shuanghui supermarket were afraid of me and immediately worked very hard. They all treated me like a regional undercover inspector for Shuanghui, and even people from Shuanghui avoided me. Because I'm quite strong, I look a bit imposing in a suit. Continue to increase your purchases after conducting research.

I told Yan with relief, "Our 150-square-meter apartment on Guanhai Road was bought with money earned from Shuanghui. During the major bear market of 2000-2004, there were 5-6 stocks that soared, and Dad owned 2 of them. Dad loves bear markets; he laughs out loud when they happen!" I asked Yan, "Is Dad a madman?" Yan smiled and said, "Dad, he's a young old madman." Before I knew it, it was past 10:30. I told Yan to go to sleep. Yan said, "Dad, I'll stay here." I said, "Are you crazy? It's too late. Go over there; don't let Qianqian be alone and unable to see you." Yan said, "Then give me a kiss." I put my arm around Yan's waist and kissed her deeply. I said, "Dad will kiss you another day. Go over there." Yan obediently went back to her and Qianqian's room.

(13) I

stood by the study window and looked out at the small hill behind me. Fine, intermittent snowflakes were falling outside the window, and the hill was covered with a thin layer of snow. The lights shining from the windows of the houses on the hillside and at the foot of the hill looked so soft and warm against the backdrop of the snow. At this moment, Yan came up behind me, hugged my neck, and casually pulled the curtains closed. Then she rested her face on my right shoulder, her long, beautiful hair falling over my shoulder. In the soft light, Yan looked charming. Yan murmured in my ear, "Dad, Qianqian is asleep." I said, "Aren't you afraid that Qianqian will find out something?"

Yan said, "Dad, your room and our room are two enclosed spaces. Don't you lock the door to your outer room at night? If you lock the bedroom door, no one outside can hear anything." I said, "Don't stay here too long." I carried Yan from the study into the bedroom. Yan and I lay naked on the large bed. My strong, slightly overweight 1.78-meter-tall body lay on my back, and my penis stood erect. I said, "Yan, climb on top of Dad." Yan was slightly shy, her face a little red. The shapely, slender Yan climbed onto my body. I caressed her firm little buttocks with both hands, and Yan cupped her breasts to feed me. I kissed her nipples vigorously. Yan's juices flowed onto my lower abdomen. I rolled over, pinning Yan beneath me, and inserted my penis into her pubic mound. Yan said, "Dad, I want to see."

I placed a pillow under Yan's head so she could see clearly. I pulled my penis out completely and then inserted it again. "Yan, Dad, slow down." I had to slow down. I said, "What did you see?" Yan said, "I saw Dad fucking me." I said, "Do dads fuck their daughters?" Yan said, "I don't know." I said, "Isn't Dad fucking you?" Yan said, "I only want you to fuck and kiss me, I don't know anything else." "Yan, Dad, rest if you're tired," I said, inserting my penis and ceasing my thrusts while I lay on top of Yan. We kissed. We kept stopping and starting like this, and before we knew it, almost an hour had passed. It's almost 10:30, time to finish, Qianqian is still at home. I increased the frequency and force of my thrusts.

(14)

Although it was noon today, it was still noticeably cool. The sea was very rough, and the waves crashing against the embankment splashed onto the sidewalk. Yan drove me out of Guanhai Road and headed towards Yangma Island. Along the way, we stopped to watch where the waves could reach the shore. After a while, we drove into a wide mudflat, where the seawater couldn't reach the shore and the sea breeze was gentler. To the left of the road was a long, deep green belt, and in the distance, there were beautiful peaks of varying sizes. Yan turned the car onto a small dirt road in the green belt and drove towards the nearby peaks.

Later, we stopped in the middle of a large grassy area. This was completely our own world. We put down the backrests; this American car was really spacious. I lay half-reclined and Yan nestled in my arms. We were silent for a moment, and then Yan broke the silence, "Dad, Qianqian will be starting school at the end of the month." I said, "It's so late." Yan said, "Qianqian's private school is different from other schools, but their holidays start late too." I said, "Feng hasn't said he'd be back." Yan said, "He said this morning he might come back the day after tomorrow, but Feng said the heavy snow disrupted many people's holiday plans, so they had to reschedule, hence the lateness." I said, "Qianqian and Feng can spend a few more days together." Yan said, "Feng kept explaining to me, and I said, 'I understand, why explain so much? Don't I even have that much awareness?'"

I said, "Yan, Feng is a good soldier and a good man, you should treat him well." Yan said, "Dad, I know that, but I feel a sense of estrangement from Feng." I said, "I don't want you and Feng to have any problems, especially with Qianqian. It's all Dad's fault." Yan said, "Dad, don't think so much. Feng trusts me a lot. After I graduated from university, I started dating Feng, and I told him I'd never been in a relationship before. Feng didn't believe I was still a virgin after graduating from university. Later, it turned out I wasn't lying to him, and he swore to be good to me for life. Now he has no reason to doubt me, and I don't have any scandals at work." I said, "That's good, let's go back to how things were before." Yan said, "That's impossible. Once we've taken that step, there's no going back." Yan said emotionally, "Dad, you don't really understand how I feel about you. I don't know why I've always been so attached to you since I was little. Maybe you're my pillar of support. Dad, I know that two years ago you gave up that woman who was younger than me because you didn't want to give me another brother or sister. That's why she left you. You didn't want anyone else to take what you gave me." I said, "Let bygones be bygones." I asked Yan how long Feng would stay.

Yan said, "About 20 days. In July, when Qianqian is on vacation, we'll go to Feng's place together. Then Feng will come back for the Chinese New Year, and he might come back once more in between." I said, "Yan, when Feng comes back, you and Qianqian should go back to Muping with him for a few days, so your in-laws can enjoy some family time." Yan said seriously, "Dad, I need to ask you for a favor, you have to agree." I said, "Do I need you to ask me? Just say it." Yan said, "Dad, Feng and I have agreed that when Feng comes back, Qianqian and I will both go back to Muping. Anyway, it's not too far for me to drive to work." I said, "Feng didn't stay at our house for most of last year's Spring Festival." Yan said, "Feng also wanted to come back, but he couldn't persuade me otherwise. When Feng comes back, we'll go and stay there to balance things out for him." I said, "This was your idea, wasn't it?"

Yan said Feng praised me for being sensible. Yan playfully whispered in my ear, "Dad, I'm afraid you'll be unhappy if you stay with us." I said, "Why would I be unhappy?" Yan pretended to be serious and said, "If you're happy, I'll be unhappy." I generously said, "Okay, whatever you want then." I laughed and said, "You brought me out here just to talk about this, right?" Yan said, "Dad's so bored at home. I don't dare cling to you. Before, when Qianqian was here, I clung to you, but now that I don't, Qianqian feels uneasy, saying, 'Mom, you've grown up!'" Yan said, "Dad, the main reason we came out today is to take you for a drive. It's a little past 2 now. Let's go for a quick trip around Yangma Island and then head back. On the way back, we'll walk right along the coast and see the big waves." I said, "Okay!" Yan said sweetly, "Dad, then give me a kiss." I kissed Yan below the forehead. Yan exclaimed, "That doesn't count!" I held Yan's face in my hands and kissed her... At 4 pm, we drove onto Guanhai Road. We were getting closer and closer to home. I got out of the car and went for a walk by the sea. I let Yan drive home first.

(15) Facing

the snow that had fallen all day, it stopped in the evening. Standing on the balcony, the sea breeze mixed with the slightly cool and humid air brushed against my face. The sea was so calm and peaceful, unlike the raging waves of the previous days. At this moment, I felt relaxed and confident. Just now at 18:30, I finally saw the China Securities Regulatory Commission (CSRC) make a fuss online. It was too late. It's like a breach in a dike. When it's small, it can be plugged. But when it's big, it's hard to plug, or it can't be plugged at all. The best outcome of this fuss is that the market will rise slightly. This time, the main force's dumping was not only against raising money, but also had a bigger intention: to reduce the tax on inflows. The means was to dump the market and even break the issue price of new shares. Today, I bought 5,000 shares of China Coal at 19.81 and sold them at 20.42 15 minutes later. This was a great deal. Tomorrow, the large amount of funds I used to apply for new shares will be unfrozen. Main force, you can dump them all you want. You should be happy that someone is sabotaging your business. Let's have another half-glass tonight. Just then, Qianqian called me to dinner. I couldn't linger any longer.

Tonight, I drank an extra half-glass of health wine, Yan drank a glass of dry red wine, and Qianqian, encouraged by Yan and me, also drank a small glass of dry red wine. Yan can't drink much; one glass and her face turned a little red. Actually, I can't drink much either; I usually only drink health wine. After dinner, we watched a diving competition for a while. Before we knew it, it was 9 pm, and Qianqian went to bed first. Yan and I watched CCTV2 in the living room, and after catching up on the main content, we went to the study. I always close the living room door at night, then close the doors to my outer room and bedroom; the study is behind the bedroom. This apartment seems to be divided into two apartments by the living room, with bathrooms on both sides. Yan and I had a very private time inside. I lay on my back on the bed, and Yan turned off the computer, got into bed, and gently climbed on top of me, her head nestled against my chest. Yan's usually fair face was flushed; she looked even more charming at that moment. I laughed and said, "With this level of skill, you'd blush after just one cup."

After a while, Yan said seriously, "Dad, Feng is coming back tomorrow afternoon. He takes a plane from Changsha at 10:45 am, arrives in Jinan around 12 pm, and then takes a car back." I said, "If it weren't for this snowstorm, he would have come back much earlier." Yan said shyly, "Dad, do you really like him coming back?" I said, "Of course." Yan said, "Dad, you're not telling the truth." I said, "If you want Dad to tell the truth, Dad will tell you. I liked him 100% before, and I still like him now. It's impossible to think about the past. Men are selfish in that aspect." Yan said, "I feel a sense of estrangement towards Feng, even though we were deeply in love before." I said, "Feng hasn't done anything wrong. We must treat him well." Yan said confidently, "Dad, don't worry, your daughter knows what to do." I said, "Yan, you two go back to Muping and don't come back. Take your laptop with you and chat online when you have time. Call if you need anything." Yan said angrily, "But I still have to come back to work. I can always come back from my neighborhood." "I'll come back to cook for you when I have time, Dad. The more you do this, the worse it gets. Feng thinks you and I are having a conflict. Dad, Feng and I will come back when we need to." I said, "Then you decide, as long as you're happy."

Yan and I snuggled together, her face pressed against my chest, her beautiful hair cascading over my chest. I tenderly stroked Yan's forehead. Yan murmured, "Dad, you have to take good care of me tonight." I said, "Dad, I will take good care of you." Yan took off my clothes, and quickly took off her own. We stood up and hugged each other on the bed, kissing passionately. Yan whispered in my ear, "Dad, fuck your daughter!" I put Yan on the bed, my thing standing erect. Yan looked at it. I asked Yan, "Is Dad's penis big?" Yan said shyly, "Yes." I said, "How did you know?" Yan: "Yours is bigger than Feng's." Yan pretended to be angry and said, "Dad, you're bad."

My strong body climbed onto Yan's fair, slender, and shapely body. I placed my hands on Yan's small breasts and watched as my penis powerfully penetrated her vagina. Yan let out a soft cry, "Ah," and said, "Dad, be gentle." I removed my hands from Yan's breasts to support my body. Yan raised her head and leaned back, supporting herself with her elbows, watching me thrust into her. Yan and I always watched me thrust into her. I watched as my penis was fully pulled out and then inserted back into her vagina. I said, "Dad, was it good?" Yan: "Yes." I thrust into Yan's vagina frantically. After about half an hour, Yan's two shapely long legs stood up, and then her two slender legs wrapped around my waist. I knew the final moment was approaching. I thrust into Yan's vagina with all my might. Yan's whole body twisted, and she closed her eyes and remained still. For some reason, I haven't ejaculated yet today, and I keep thrusting into Yan. Yan closed her eyes, with two small tears hanging from them, and kept saying: Dad, no, have pity on your daughter.

I inserted my penis into Yan's vagina, supported myself on the bed with both hands, and gently climbed onto Yan's body. Yan suddenly raised her head and bit my shoulder. I said to Yan, do you still dare to let your dad drink health wine every day? Yan pretended to be pitiful and said, Dad, I will never dare to do it again. I gently pulled Yan's two little ears with both hands, and gently kissed Yan's eyes and red cheeks, and then kissed her mouth to mouth. My penis was gently wriggling in Yan's vagina. Yan then let out a soft moan. I slowly and forcefully inserted my penis into Yan's vagina.

(16) Midnight Thoughts

Another day is about to pass, I am enjoying solitude, I like solitude, I can read and think quietly, maybe the inspiration for wealth will come. I am still savoring the noise and warmth of the day.

Today we agreed that Yan and Feng would bring Qianqian to eat at around 10 am. I took Qianqian to school in the afternoon. Around 10 a.m., I was checking the market when my phone rang. Qianqian's sweet voice came through: "Grandpa, we're almost there! We're on Guanhai Road!" I watched from the balcony for a moment, and then I saw Yan's cream-colored Chevrolet drive into the compound. Yan got out of the car and gave me a stunning look. My once long-haired, well-behaved daughter had transformed into a young woman with her hair piled high. Her 1.66-meter-tall figure looked even taller, and a platinum necklace adorned her long, white neck, giving her an air of elegance and charm. Feng was still wearing glasses, a little taller than me, maybe 1.80 meters, slightly thin, but with a good spirit. I thought to myself that my daughter must have won over Feng, this "officer," and of course he'd obey her every command.

Yan and Feng cooked lunch. I can't cook; sometimes when no one cooks, I just make oatmeal with milk and bread. Yan, who learned to cook from her mother, is quite good at it; she quickly prepared the food. None of my family drinks baijiu (Chinese liquor), so we only drank dry red wine and beer. Actually, we didn't drink much of either; the four of us finished a bottle of Changyu beer and three cans of Tsingtao beer. Feng and I talked about everything from the military to information technology, then to national defense modernization, and then to modern high-tech warfare. Later, we moved from politics to economics, then to education, and finally settled on our educational plans for Qianqian. To be honest, I don't dislike Feng. Every time we meet, we have a great conversation, and it feels like we're evenly matched. After all, Feng is a master's student and is the person Yan and I have chosen for us. Time flew by, and at 2:30 PM, Yan and Feng took Qianqian to school. Before leaving, Feng said he and Yan would come over to keep me company that evening. I said, "You only stay home a few days a year; spend more time with your parents. Don't listen to everything Yan says." Yan pretended to be angry and said, "Dad, what's wrong with me?" I said, "I don't want to talk to you about it." Feng smiled. The three of us went to school.

At this midnight hour, I feel relieved. There haven't been any obstacles between Feng and me. Perhaps it's selfish of me, but the most important thing is that Yan is my daughter, and both Feng and I love her. Knowing this, I won't be so petty. Yan moves freely between Feng and me, which impresses me. I had a girlfriend before, but I left her. Girls born in the 80s are too selfish; she wanted me to buy a house with her parents, a car, and then she wanted to marry me. I don't want my beloved daughter to fight over inheritance and go to court after my death. Although I can't compare to the wealthy, I'm still richer than most. Most importantly, my wealth is sunshine, earned penny by penny. Xu Yan might choose to give it up, but I will never let that happen. Because I love my daughter. I'm a very strong man. Some people think 55 is a bit old, but I don't see it that way. 55 is still middle age. I need women, even when I'm old. I can still find them. As a man, you could say that the more wealth you have, the more privacy you have, and the more privacy you have, the more women you have. Since my birthday, Yan and I have had that special love, and I have decided to give up other women. Yan and I have a feeling of kinship and romantic love. It is too intimate, too private, too immersive, and too exciting. The reason why I did not bury my secret with my daughter, but wrote it in my blog, is that I just used the blog as a diary to put my secret here. If you happen to see it, no matter what you think or say, it will go with the wind for me, because I am too happy and can't care about anything else!

(17) I opened my daughter's blog (1)

The sky is not very clear today. It has been like this since morning until now, almost 11:30. The sun can't get out of the thin clouds. Standing in front of the French windows in the living room, looking at the vast sea, the sea is particularly calm today. It is another rare day of leisure. The ringtone of the mobile phone broke the silence of this moment. My daughter Yan's voice came from the edge of the city: Dad, is dinner ready? I said it will be ready soon, the rice will be cooked in a while. Yan said anxiously, "Dad, I work both the morning and afternoon shifts today. I'll come home after work." I said, "Don't come back unless it's important."

Yan said coquettishly, "What could be wrong? I just miss you, Dad. Feng and I haven't been home for so long. Feng even thought I came home every day on my way to and from work. Dad, you're so heartless!" I asked, "Where's Feng?" Yan said, "He went to the supermarket downstairs to buy some things." I said, "How long will Feng be gone?" Yan said, "After the 13th, no later than the 15th." I said, "There are still 4 or 5 days. Bring him back tomorrow so we can get together and have a good chat. We'll have one last meal together on the day he leaves." Yan said, "Dad, I know, I just miss you so much."

I said, "Silly girl, Dad misses you too." Yan teased, "Of course! Who else would I miss, Dad? How much do I miss you?" I said, "A lot." Yan pressed, "How much do you mean by 'a lot'?" I said, "I mean, an overwhelming amount." Yan said, "Then look at me online first." I said, "Video." Yan said, "No, go to my blog." I said, "Okay." Yan said, "My Sina Weibo address is the pinyin of my name. As for the password, Dad, I can't tell you right now." I said, "I regret it, I don't want you to see it."

Yan said aggrievedly, "Dad, what are you saying? The password is the first 10 letters of the English alphabet corresponding to your birthdate. That's why I can't tell you right now." I said, "Is it that mysterious?" Yan said mysteriously, "Dad, you'll know once you see it. Don't be angry after seeing it, and definitely don't scold me." I said, "Is it that serious?" Yan said seriously, "Of course, by the way, Dad, the address and password are both lowercase." I said, "I know, silly girl, what other secrets do you have?" Yan continued patiently, "Dad, that blog isn't public, other people can't see it, don't change anything, and remember to log out after you see it." I said, "What else?" Yan said, "Dad, are you annoyed with me?" I said, "I wouldn't dare, I just feel a bit confused." Yan chuckled on the other end of the phone and said, "Then you can see how many clouds and how much fog there are. Dad, it's almost 12 o'clock, let's eat!" I said, "Okay."

(18) I opened my daughter's blog. (2)

Tonight, at this moment, I opened Yan's blog for the fourth time since yesterday. Perhaps the thoughts at midnight can be clear and long-lasting. I pasted my daughter's blog posts into my blog so that I can often recall those beautiful times in the past and deeply savor my daughter's love for me.

Dad, I love you

. Dad, this blog is our rest stop. We can stay and rest here. If we are no longer in this world many years later, let all our eternity be here.

Dad, before your birthday, we maintained the image of a loving father and a good daughter. The only change after your birthday was that passion made us closer. We took baths together, in the bathtub, on the sofa, in the car, and in our old house. Dad, I like it best when you kiss me from behind. At that moment, I am not your good daughter, but your woman. Dad, I secretly took these photos with our family's mini camera and put them on this blog. There are also a few nude photos of your daughter on your blog, and a picture I casually took of you this morning—very sexy, with your penis still erect while you were sleeping. There are also photos on the blog of you visiting me at the University of Finance and Economics after you retired from your job, photos we took in Beidaihe. My mom has never seen them, and I don't dare let her see them. Dad, I rediscovered you then. Before, I only admired you; from then on, I worshipped you. It was a kind of worship where I desperately wanted you to kiss me.

I never imagined you could guide me in writing my thesis. Actually, I only knew some basic concepts of cash flow, quick ratio, inventory turnover, etc., and my understanding of judging a company's quality from financial statements and how to distinguish between genuine and fake financial statements wasn't very thorough. Dad, you didn't study accounting either; I didn't know you could use it so skillfully. You even provided me with many examples, making my defense unexpected, unique, and perfect. In Beidaihe, we had a blast, acting more like lovers than father and daughter. In the sea, I asked you to swim with me, to hold me, to carry me. Actually, I can swim; after all, our home is right by the sea, how could I not swim? I think you were pretending not to know, Dad. Our skin was pressed together underwater. Dad, we were in our swimsuits on the rocks, me sitting in your lap, and you posted a picture of me holding you on your blog. That night in that quiet mountain village of Beidaihe, I hoped something wouldn't happen, but it still didn't. I still gave my first time to Feng. Dad, if your daughter wasn't a virgin, would Feng not want her? Feng didn't expect to find a college student who was still a virgin as a wife.

Dad, speaking of Feng, if you were compared to Feng, Dad, your body is a bit heavy for me. I can feel your strong muscles. Your broad chest. Dad, I have so much love and devotion for you. When you knelt between my legs, lifting them up and placing them in your arms, it was the first time I'd seen you so strong, with a penis much larger than Feng's. The moment your penis entered me, it really hurt; I felt so full. Only Feng had ever touched me there, and Qianqian had a C-section; I'd never had anything so big inside me. Dad, you didn't even show me any tenderness; I felt like your penis was going to lift me up. Your wild thrusts, lifting my legs and opening and closing them, made me writhe comfortably, feeling like I was about to fly. It felt like when you held me around the waist as a child, and I'd grab your clothes and spin around, flying... Dad, when I think of other women burdened by love and life, I feel comforted and proud. Of all the men in this world, my father is the best, the closest to me, and my strongest support. Dad, I love you, and I want to be your daughter and your woman for life.

Daughter Yan

wrote this at 3 PM on March 9, 2008, on the lawn by the roadside on the way to Muping. Dad can only write this in the car.

(19) Back to our world as a couple

Taking a walk on the beach every evening is something I never miss. The sea breeze was gentle today, so comforting on my face. The sky was blue, the water was blue, and seagulls were calling overhead. Every day I wait to see the sun sink into the sea. To be honest, I can't describe that scene; it's so beautiful, evoking the imagery of the ebb and flow of the tide and the countless sunsets. Today, my heart is filled with both excitement and peace. Right now, my thoughts are on my daughter, Yan. She's at home, busy cooking. It's been over half a month since she came home, and Feng left today too. I'm a little melancholy. Can Yan and I ever be like before? After all, Yan and Feng have a bond. Although my daughter is very close to me, I still maintain a passive position. Most importantly, Yan is my daughter, and I don't want her to feel neglected. Before I knew it, it was getting dark. Time to go home for dinner. I've been walking longer than usual today. Just then, my phone rang. Yan said urgently, "Dad, dinner's ready! I've been waiting for you." I hurried home. The moment I heard my daughter Yan's voice, my earlier worries vanished.

Yan had prepared a very thoughtful dinner; seafood was a must, and we had to have some wine. Yan quickly brought out a plate of wild bitter greens. She said, "Dad, we don't have any scallions yet. I've been to several places and haven't found any. Just eat the bitter greens with dipping sauce." I said, "Bitter greens with dipping sauce are delicious and good for cooling down." My four favorite foods are seafood, I used to drink Yantai and Tsingtao beer, now I drink health wine, sometimes beer and red wine, and scallions with dipping sauce and bitter greens with dipping sauce. Today I have all four! I haven't had them for half a month. Yan kept blaming me for not letting her come home to cook for me for the past two weeks. Yan said, "Dad, you're worrying unnecessarily." I said, "Okay, okay, it's just Dad being petty." Yan quickly cleared the dishes. I turned on the TV, but there wasn't much content; it was just some rich and powerful people spouting nonsense. I decided to go online instead.

Yan was tidying up the house and doing laundry. I still don't know how to use the washing machine, and I've accumulated quite a few dirty clothes over the past two weeks. Yan finished in no time. She came to the study to tell me that the water was boiled and that I should take a shower. I said, "Yan, you go ahead and shower. I'll rinse off the rest." A little while later, Yan called me. I went to the bathroom and stood outside the glass door of the bathtub, jokingly asking, "What do you need?" Yan said, "Dad, come in and give me a back scrub." I went in and saw Yan lying comfortably in the bathtub. Yan said pitifully, "Dad, I haven't taken a bath for two weeks. Feng's house doesn't have a bathtub, so I can only use the water heater to rinse off." I pretended to be reluctant and said, "Okay then, Dad will scrub your back." Yan said angrily, "How can I scrub it? You didn't even change your clothes, and my head is all wet." I went out, took off my clothes, wrapped a towel around my neck, and came back in. Yan rolled over in the bathtub and braced herself against the edge. I gently rubbed Yan's back; it was still dirtier than usual. I teased, "You're such a jerk." Yan said, "It's all your fault. I'll deal with the rest myself. Dad, you should wash now. I'll scrub your back later. It's been half a month since anyone scrubbed your back, it's bound to get dirty." I didn't want Yan to see my erection, so I tried my best to distract her and make it go down. Yan reached out from the tub, pulled off my towel, and said, "Dad, hurry up and wash." My erection could no longer be hidden, and Yan paused for a moment.

I had no choice but to pretend to wash. Yan came out of the tub and scrubbed my back, then rinsed it clean with the showerhead. My erection still wouldn't go down. Yan wrapped her arms around my waist from behind, resting her head against my back, her long, beautiful hair cascading down my broad back. Yan murmured, "Dad, I want you to bathe me like you did when I was little." Without saying anything, I turned around, picked up Yan, and placed her on the edge of the bathtub. Yan softly lay down on her back along the edge of the tub, one leg in the tub and the other leg outside. Her two firm breasts were even more perky, especially the little mound below her abdomen, which was so prominent. I took the showerhead and rinsed Yan with water, then applied bath gel, and then gently massaged Yan's breasts with bath gel, and then massaged Yan's little mound with bath gel from light to heavy.

Yan couldn't help but say: Dad, okay, rinse it off. I turned on the showerhead and rinsed Yan's body. I picked Yan up and walked towards the bedroom. Yan hugged my neck and said emotionally: Dad, my body is clean now. This is the only way I can be your woman again. I also whispered emotionally in Yan's ear: Dad really wants to kiss you to death.

(20) Separation makes the kiss even stronger

I gently placed Yan on the bed and turned on the bedroom ceiling light. Yan's eyes were slightly closed, her slender body perfectly integrated, her entire form exposed before me like a piece of jade sculpted from stone. An unparalleled beauty. Was this the daughter I embraced every night? I didn't want to touch my daughter Yan too soon, even though my penis was so hard and full. I calmly admired Yan. I wanted to savor this beautiful sight a little longer. Yan's beautiful hair cascaded down the pillow like a waterfall, her delicate eyelashes fluttering slightly, her small mouth round, her chin slightly pointed, her nose straight, her neck neither too long nor too short, her shoulders neither too thin nor too fat, her skin as white and smooth as jade, her two firm breasts like ripe peaches. Her graceful waist, her long, flawless legs, without an ounce of excess fat, and the mysterious mound between her legs, with its fine downy hair like a spring meadow, guarded the place that drove me wild.

I gently knelt between Yan's legs. Yan's eyes, still slightly closed, opened slightly. She smiled shyly at me and whispered, "Dad, have you seen enough?" At that moment, I leaned down on Yan, supporting my weight with my elbows. I whispered in her ear, "Dad can never get enough of you. Have you missed Dad these past two weeks?" Yan whispered, "Yes, I missed you terribly!" I said, "Dad missed you too." I gently kissed Yan's forehead, then her slightly closed eyes, and her earlobes. Then, I gently held her head with my hands, my thumbs and forefingers lightly tugging at her ears. Yan wrapped her arms around my neck, and we kissed each other spontaneously. Even though I weigh nearly 190 pounds, I couldn't bear the weight of her; my elbows supported most of my weight. I couldn't hurt Yan. I lay down and turned her over. I said, "You can kiss Dad on top." Yan was shy

, but still climbed onto my strong body. I asked Yan, "Is Dad strong?" Yan quickly replied, "Yes." I asked, "Is it comfortable?" Yan blushed and said, "It feels so good, Daddy, it's like sailing a ship at sea." I stroked Yan's smooth skin and her two firm little buttocks. Our legs were intertwined, rubbing against each other—it felt so good. I truly understood that even a short separation from Yan could cause a feeling of hunger in our skin. Yan was sucking on my nipples. I pushed Yan back with my hand, and she retreated to my lower abdomen. I propped myself up halfway, looking at my erect penis. I asked Yan if it was big. Yan obediently said, "Yes." I said, "Then kiss it." Yan was still a little embarrassed. I said, "It's okay, we just took a shower." Yan still obediently listened to me and kissed my penis.
My penis was practically about to burst. I laid Yan flat on the bed, and I spread her legs apart. The view of her mound was so clear. I parted her labia with my hands and couldn't help but kiss inside. Yan cried out, her body twisting wildly. I opened the gates of her vulva with both hands, my elbows and arms wedging her thighs. My tongue entered the second entrance, moving frantically. Yan moaned in pleasure. She pleaded, "Daddy, I can't take it anymore!" I had to stop kissing her vulva. My penis plunged into her wet vulva. The pent-up desire and longing of the past two weeks flowed into my penis, making our passion even more intense and enduring than before.

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The secret my daughter and I can't tell even if we go to hell.

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