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My cousin is healing her heartbreak. 

Chapter One: Heartbreak

This breakup truly devastated Zhang Zhengyu! Although it wasn't his first time experiencing heartbreak, he had never felt so heartbroken and angry as he had this time. He had given his heart and soul to Chen Huijia, but he never expected that his sincerity would be so ruthlessly trampled on. It could be said that he had never been so devastated since he was old enough to understand things, making him completely doubt whether there was any justice left in life.






Although a friend's sister introduced Zhang Zhengyu to a female classmate before he joined the army, and the two had been corresponding for over a year, their relationship remained lukewarm and distant. Whenever Zhang Zhengyu tried to take things further and become a couple, she would ignore him. When Zhang Zhengyu decided to give up, she would write to him as if nothing had happened, rekindling his hope and prompting him to continue corresponding with her. However, when Zhang Zhengyu felt the time was right and began to pursue her passionately, she would ignore him again. After this chase-and-run situation played out several times, Zhang Zhengyu lost interest and didn't want to waste any more time with her.






Later, he was sent by his company commander to receive non-commissioned officer training. The non-commissioned officer camp was not far from the home of one of his junior college classmates, Xiao Jian. Because Xiao Jian was too thin, he was classified as a Class D soldier during the physical examination and was exempt from military service, so he could start working as soon as possible. He spent most of his weekends resting at home. Therefore, every Sunday when he had time off, he would bring his two friends, A Hui and A Yi, who were also in training, to visit Xiao Jian's home. It was there that he met his cousin, Chen Huijia, who was three years younger than Xiao Jian. At that time, she had just transferred from Yilan to Hualien to study in her third year of high school and was temporarily staying at Xiao Jian's home to make it easier to attend school nearby. When the three soldiers first saw Chen Huijia, who had a delicate appearance, a sweet smile, and a slightly classical temperament, they were all amazed by her beauty!






Zhang Zhengyu sensed that both Hui and Yi were interested in her, so he decided to seize the opportunity to win Chen Huijia's heart. Therefore, on his last day off before completing his training, he visited Xiao Jian's house alone. Under the guise of taking photos, he asked Chen Huijia to take pictures for him, and of course, he also took the opportunity to invite her to be in the photos. After the photos were developed, he sent a copy to Chen Huijia, and the two naturally began corresponding, dating, and going on dates, immersing himself in the joy of love every day during the latter half of his military service!






However, after finding out, Xiao Jian warned him, "You'd better think it over again; she has a lot of men pursuing her."






However, he was so engrossed in the sweetness of love that he couldn't listen to such unpleasant but truthful advice. Moreover, he was very confident in himself. After all, back in his student days, he was a handsome guy who was often pursued by female students who took the initiative to ask him out. However, he was arrogant and didn't care about these ordinary girls who offered themselves to him. He only wanted to find his true love, so he always kept his arms open and waited for his ideal woman to appear. Now he believed that Chen Huijia was the one he had been looking for. With his height of 180 centimeters, weight of 65 kilograms, the strong physique he had developed through rigorous military training, and his handsome appearance like an idol star, he and she were a match made in heaven. He was not afraid to compete with others.






So he confidently replied to Xiao Jian, "It's okay, we'll compete fairly!"






Xiao Jian wanted to say more, but seeing his persistence and confidence, she couldn't bring herself to speak. In the end, she just patted him on the shoulder and said, "Okay, but don't get too deeply involved too quickly, lest you hurt yourself!"






At the time, Zhang Zhengyu did not take Xiao Jian's words seriously, but he soon discovered that the meaning behind his words was far greater than he had imagined!






After being stationed in various locations with his unit, Zhang Zhengyu finally received his discharge order, ending his military career. He returned to Taipei excitedly. Because Chen Huijia failed her university entrance exam, she decided to come to Taipei to retake it. Zhang Zhengyu, who had just graduated from a five-year vocational college, also decided to temporarily stop working and focus on studying for a year to prepare for the two-year technical college entrance exam. He originally thought that since he and Chen Huijia were both preparing to go to university, they could encourage each other and work together to achieve their goals like the Condor Heroes. However, he never expected that after coming to Taipei from Yilan, Chen Huijia would quickly lose herself in the dazzling world.






At first, Chen Huijia only complained that he didn't know how to dress and that she felt embarrassed when she went out with him. Then she complained that he didn't have a job, a car, or even a motorcycle, and that he had to take the bus or a taxi to go out, which made her feel insecure. Later, she even bluntly criticized him for his narrow social circle, lack of knowledge, and dull speech, making him seem worthless. This almost caused him to break up with her several times. However, whenever he talked to his military friend Ah Hui about his various unpleasant experiences with Chen Huijia, Ah Hui always advised him to be more tolerant of Chen Huijia because she was still young and he had a very strong personality. Only with gentleness and patience could their relationship last.






So Zhang Zhengyu endured her unreasonable behavior every time, tolerating her arrogance time and time again, believing that one day her would understand his good intentions. To please her, Zhang Zhengyu even took a job at a factory in a nearby industrial area, walking to work every morning, working on the production line all day, and then rushing to his tutoring class. He wouldn't return home until after 10 p.m., exhausted, after taking a shower, he would immediately pick up his books and study until midnight before going to bed. Under such a busy schedule, he lost weight in less than a month, and naturally had even less time and energy to date Chen Huijia.






However, all his efforts seemed to have failed to move Chen Huijia. Although he was able to take her to some upscale restaurants after he started working and earning an income, which improved Chen Huijia's mood a lot, her domineering attitude towards Zhang Zhengyu not only did not change at all, but became more and more excessive. She often yelled at him in front of her friends, completely disregarding his self-esteem. He could no longer bear it, and left with a livid face, angrily thinking that he might as well just break up with her.






After a week of cold war, although he was still angry, his friend A-Hui kept advising him to be more tolerant of Chen Hui-Chia's youthful immaturity and to use patience and love to influence her. He also felt that since Chen Hui-Chia had come to Taipei alone to study for university entrance exams, he had an obligation to protect her, his classmate's cousin. After all, Xiao-Chia's family had taken good care of him both during his school years and when he was in the military, and he had to repay their kindness!






Since he didn't have tutoring on Saturday night, he went to a temple outside Chen Huijia's rented apartment to call her. To his surprise, Chen Huijia didn't answer his call with the same impatience as before; instead, she jokingly asked, "It's almost Chinese New Year, are you calling to wish me a happy new year?"






Zhang Zhengyu was in a terrible mood and couldn't laugh at her frivolous joke. He simply said, "I'm outside your apartment right now. Could you come out for a moment? I have something I want to talk to you about."






Chen Huijia, however, remained unperturbed and said with a smile, "You're outside? Come on in."






Zhang Zhengyu coldly replied, "No, come out here. I'll wait for you here on the temple stage."






Chen Huijia sensed that Zhang Zhengyu, who used to always obey her, was acting differently. After a few seconds of hesitation, she said, "Okay, wait for me," and then hung up the phone.






張正宇靠在宮廟戲台的牆壁上點了根菸吸了一口,寒風迎面吹來讓他不由得打了個寒噤,趕緊拉了拉衣領並用力的吸了一口菸取暖。原本他是不抽菸的,但是在退伍後,被陳慧嘉將他嫌棄的一無是處,讓他這半年來心情幾乎沒有一天好過,因此一開始是別人請他抽菸時他不再拒絕被動接受,後來則是他主動去買菸抽。






就在他胡思亂想之際,耳邊忽然傳來一個輕柔的聲音說:「你什麼時候也跟別人一樣開始抽菸啦?」






張正宇抬頭一望,只見陳慧嘉不知道何時已經來到他面前,手上還提了一個紙提袋,平常大多穿著襯衫與牛仔褲的她,今天卻是盛裝打扮穿了一套深紅色的高級連身長裙裝,臉上還化了妝像是戴了面具一般,讓他差點認不出來,內心不禁暗自感嘆:「之前那一個樸素清純的小女孩究竟到哪裡去了?」






陳慧嘉見他沒答腔,便在她身旁坐了下來望著遠方喃喃說:「我不想見到你抽菸,不想看到你變成這個模樣,如果你沒抽菸的話,我在大街上遇到你或許還會跟你打招呼,現在你這個樣子,即使我遇到你也不會跟你打招呼…」






原本張正宇在見到她時心裡面是非常難過的,但在聽她講了這一番話,心理面不由得一把無名火起暗罵道:「我變成這個樣子還不是妳造成的?怎麼了,妳向我打招呼是很給我面子嗎?」






但是接下來更讓他火大的是,陳慧嘉竟然將她手中所提的那個紙提袋遞到他面前說:「這些都是你的東西,你寫給我的信、送給我的書、禮物…現在全都還給你,我不需要了。」






張正宇叼著菸從她的手中接下紙提袋翻了一下,果然如她所說的,張正宇寫給他的信、送給他的書以及一些小禮物全都在裡面,唯獨不見在去年為她舉辦十八歲生日慶生會時張正宇送給她的那一條價值不斐的紅寶石金項鍊,以及她在前陣子以繳交房租為由向他借的現金。






張正宇淡淡地說:「我送給別人的東西,一向是不會要回來的,但只有一樣東西除外!」






陳慧嘉愣了半晌後才開口回答說:「嗯…我知道,那條金項鍊以及你借我的錢,我都會還給你…我前幾天其實已經用限時掛號寄給你了,你沒收到嗎?」






張正宇這下子真的徹底失望了,因為他的意思其實是指除了他對陳慧嘉所付出的感情之外,他送給他的東西都不會要回來,但沒想到陳慧嘉滿腦子想的就只有錢,看來這個小女孩還真的很有心機,話說得那麼漂亮,但對於錢與有經濟價值的東西卻一點都不會放過,不過張正宇也不期待她真的會把金項鍊與現金還給他,所以面無表情冷冷回答說:「我沒收到!」






陳慧嘉心虛的望了他一眼,像是在自言自語的說:「那可能被別人拿走了…你真的沒收到嗎?會不會是你家人收了…」



張正宇已經受夠了她這拙劣的演技了,伸出阻止她繼續說下去的手勢說:「我沒收到,我家人也沒收到,別再講了!」






如此冷峻決絕的態度,讓習慣那總是笑臉迎人逆來順受的他軟土深掘的陳慧嘉不禁一呆,過了半晌後忽然幽幽的說:「你如果早點這樣就好了…」






對於她這突如其來的一句話,張正宇覺得莫名其妙,但依舊默不作聲的等地看她究竟要玩什麼把戲,而陳慧嘉則是望著遠方繼續說:「女孩子有些事情是要男生來做決定的,但是你給我的感覺卻是畏首畏尾的,像是跟在我身後的一隻…」






說到這裡她就不敢再說下去,張正宇強行按捺住滿腔的怒火問道:「像什麼?一隻狗嗎?」






陳慧嘉這才有些膽怯的說:「像是跟在我身後的一隻哈巴狗!」,雖然她輕聲細語,但這一句話卻是讓張正宇既憤怒又悲傷,畢竟,他之所以對她加諸於身上的種種羞辱逆來順受,全都是因為她曾在寄給他的生日卡片中寫道:「謝謝你再三的包涵我的壞脾氣,如果我要交男朋友,第一個人選一定是你!」,讓他深受感動,因此即是被她恣意踐踏男人的自尊,張正宇還是咬牙和血吞。






而今,她不但把他所有的一切善意與包容都視為理所當然,甚至於還把他當成一隻只會向他搖尾乞憐的哈巴狗,這已經不只是「我本將心托明月,奈何明月照溝渠」,而是得了便宜又賣乖,欺人太甚了!






然而,陳慧嘉接下來的話卻更是將他的憤怒與悲傷進一步推升!她望著遠方喃喃自白:「我認識了一個男孩子,大我八歲,有車子有房子,是那種讓女孩子一見到就會喜歡的類型…,我這幾個月一直都是被他養,原本我以為自己是他的唯一,但後來我才發現自己只是他眾多女孩子當中的一個,於是我就把他送給我的禮物、衣服以及錢全都送還給他…」






雖然她所說的這些張正宇之前早就已經隱隱約約感受到,因此有幾次他忍不住逼問她是不是有別的男人?但她卻都只是沉默了一會兒後說:「你如果要這麼想的話我也沒辦法!」,於是他就一再的說服自己太過多心了,強迫自己繼續信任她。現在陳慧嘉自己親口坦承她早已出軌,而之前她所說的種種,只不過是害怕承擔對愛情不忠實責任的藉口,自然是讓他備感痛心與憤怒!






然而陳慧嘉卻顯然完全沒有察覺到他的情緒已經瀕臨爆發邊緣,仍望著遠處繼續說:「有時候我覺得我自己好像一個妓女,總是有一群男人像公狗一般在我身旁打轉,只不過我沒有用自己的身體去跟他們換我想要的東西,現在我已經跟他們全都一刀兩斷了,切乾淨了…」






張正宇沒有答腔,只是用力的吸了一口菸然後緩緩地吐出煙來,想讓自己狂怒的心冷靜下來,但他心裡面的怒火卻反而越燒越旺,雖然他失戀過幾次,但女人在他的心目中始終維持著美好的形象,而今陳慧嘉卻將他對女人的所有美好想像徹底粉碎,這樣的滋味真的是比失戀還難受!






陳慧嘉瞟了他一眼後又繼續說:「你心裡面難過,我心裡面又何嘗不難過?但看到你變成這個樣子又抽菸,讓我實在不想再見到你了,如果你繼續再這樣自甘墮落,就算改天在街上遇到你我也不會跟你打招呼,以後你過你的日子,我過我的生活…。」






雖然張正宇現在心裡面亂成一團,但頭腦卻非常清楚,他聽得出來陳慧嘉向他坦承自己出軌並說自己是妓女,然後又說她已經跟其他的男人們都斷絕了往來,還說她並沒有用身體去交換自己想要的東西,說了這麼多目的無非是想要與他復合,而這一句話很明顯的是在對他下最後通牒!






但張正宇卻還是默不作聲,只是再次吸了一口菸,盡力的壓制住內心澎拜的激昂情緒,雖然在情感上他願意再次展開雙臂接納陳慧嘉,只要她誠心誠意的認錯,一切都可既往不咎,畢竟就如他的好友阿義一再提醒他,陳慧嘉年紀還小,難免一時糊塗犯了錯,但偏偏她卻拉不下臉來誠心道歉,依然要用以往的高姿態嫌棄他像條哈巴狗,要他像過去那樣不計前嫌的把所有的委屈都吞下去,反過頭來求她,好讓她順著台階走下來「原諒」他,因此在理智上他絕對無法接受如此是非不明黑白顛倒的和稀泥繼續當個爛好人,否則同樣的事將來必然還會再度發生!









在情感與理智的激烈交戰下,張正宇只能默不作聲的繼續一口又一口的抽著菸,讓入夜後這一座原本就人跡罕至的僻靜宮廟戲台氣氛變得更為寂靜,氣氛更是詭異。陳慧嘉見他一直悶不吭聲,大概認為再這樣下去也不會有任何結果,於是就站了起來拎著她所帶來的那一個紙提袋要離去,而這就像點燃了引信一般,將張正宇一直被壓抑悶燒已久的情緒瞬間引爆,在還沒來得及思考之際,他的手已經伸了出去將從身旁走過的陳慧嘉一把抱住緊緊擁在懷中,並一口吻了上去。






陳慧嘉萬萬沒有料想到一向看起來溫吞懦弱的他竟然會這麼大膽的對她發動突襲,以至於整個人完全嚇傻了,濃烈的煙味混合著男性氣息從嘴巴直衝鼻腔,讓她感到有些暈眩,而張正宇強而有力的雙臂將她的嬌軀緊緊地擁住,更是讓她差一點無法呼吸,因此她奮力的掙扎想要吸一口氣。






But this caused her curvaceous, soft, and fragrant body to rub against Zhang Zhengyu's chest, arousing him. His penis, which had initially been devoid of any impure thoughts but simply wanted to hold and kiss her, instantly became engorged and hard, pressing tightly against the inverted triangle of her lower abdomen through his pants. The pungent scent of her luxurious perfume emanating from her hair further fueled Zhang Zhengyu's desire. God descended into utter madness, pinning her to the ground and roughly tearing open her clothes. He lifted the black lace bra that tightly covered her large breasts, grabbing one of her breasts with each hand and kneading it vigorously. Finally, he began to lick her nipples wildly. Chen Huijia hurriedly begged for mercy, "No..." and instinctively covered her breasts with her hands.






But Zhang Zhengyu, who had lost his mind and transformed into a vicious wolf, completely ignored her pleas. He roughly grabbed her hands, which were covering her chest, and forced them apart and restrained her. He continued to frantically lick her nipples. Under the combined effect of fear and the cold air, the hair on her exposed skin stood on end, and her nipples also stood up. Seeing this, Zhang Zhengyu immediately took her nipple into his mouth and gently bit and pulled it with his teeth, causing her to moan in pain. However, this also gave her a strange pleasure from being abused, and she made whimpering sounds.






Although Zhang Zhengyu was young and impetuous, he was not a sadist. In the few months that he had been officially dating Chen Huijia, he had always treated her with great respect. The most intimate thing he did for her was hold her hand or put his arm around her waist when taking pictures. He never even kissed her. Once, he touched Chen Huijia's face half-jokingly, and she immediately changed her expression and said sternly, "Don't touch my face!" He quickly apologized to Chen Huijia. This was not because he lacked courage, but because he genuinely cared about her, which is why he tried so hard to restrain himself.






However, his sincere feelings were discarded by Chen Huijia, who even went so far as to be kept by another man. How could he not be furious? Although Chen Huijia said that she did not exchange her body for money, Zhang Zhengyu's trust in her had been completely shattered. He no longer believed a word she said. Driven by his anger at having his sincere feelings wasted and his desire to confirm his suspicions, he ripped Chen Huijia's already soaked black lace panties and black stockings from under her long skirt with a "ripping" sound and threw them aside.






It was too late to stop her. Chen Huijia could only cry out in terror and despair, "No..." But her mouth was immediately sealed by Zhang Zhengyu's kiss. Her already aroused vulva felt Zhang Zhengyu's hot and hard glans about to break in. She frantically twisted her body and tried to dodge, but was still struck by a "whoosh" sound. Desperate, she gave up her futile struggle, her brows furrowed and her eyes closed as she let Zhang Zhengyu's penis run rampant inside her vagina.






As Zhang Zhengyu raped her, he sneered, "You still say you didn't use your body to get a sugar daddy? You bastard pretending to be a virgin, you slut pretending to be an apple, you're just a hypocrite!"






Chen Huijia, who usually acts arrogant and unapproachable in front of Zhang Zhengyu, was truly humiliated by his insults, which were mixed with Mandarin and Taiwanese. She could only close her eyes tightly and turn her head to the side, not daring to face him.






But Zhang Zhengyu continued to rape and verbally abuse her: "Your father sincerely loves you as his wife, but you, you slut, take your father for a fool and think he's easy to bully. I can't even touch your face, but you went and got yourself kept by someone and even had your vagina inflamed. When I accompanied you to the doctor and asked you what was wrong, you still tried to take advantage of me, you little brat! You opportunistic slut, you're so horny, I'm going all out today, even if I get pregnant, I'll fuck you to death... I'll fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! I'll fuck your stinking cunt until it's ripped apart!"






He indeed thrust and pounded fiercely, each insertion hitting Chen Huijia's cervix squarely, causing her to cry out in pain and beg for mercy: "Ouch...it hurts...don't be so rough...it hurts..."






But the more she wailed and begged for mercy, the harder Zhang Zhengyu thrust into her, hurling insults and swearing: "You won't listen to reason, so you'll be forced to drink! You motherfucker, you stinking cunt that begs to be fucked! I'll fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!"






Zhang Zhengyu's father and grandfather were both from Yilan, so he spoke Yilan-accented Taiwanese from a young age. Although he rarely spoke his mother tongue after he grew up and went to school because of the government's "Mandarin policy," he still felt very close to people from Yilan or heard someone speaking Yilan-accented Taiwanese. This is why he had such a good relationship with Xiao Jian's family, who were also from Yilan, and why he was so tolerant of Chen Huijia's spoiled and willful nature.






But to his utter surprise, Chen Huijia ruthlessly trampled on his efforts, shifting all the blame for her misfortunes and infidelity onto him. She constantly used excuses to publicly humiliate him. He endured it all, but received no kindness in return. Finally, his pent-up resentment exploded, transforming the usually gentle and refined man into a ferocious beast. He unleashed his pent-up anger in his beloved Yilan-accented Taiwanese, hurling insults at Chen Huijia for all the past transgressions she had inflicted upon him. He retaliated with double the humiliation, showing no mercy as he relentlessly ravaged Chen Huijia with his engorged, furious penis, as menacing and terrifying as his current expression. She was pounded until her juices mingled with blood, staining the ground. Her consciousness faded like she was on the verge of death, and she lay sprawled on the ground like a corpse, her legs weakly spread, allowing Zhang Zhengyu's penis to thrust in and out rapidly. The slapping sounds of their bodies colliding were like the cracking of whips on Chen Huijia's body, particularly chilling in the darkness!






After raping Chen Huijia for nearly half an hour, Zhang Zhengyu, filled with rage, finally reached his limit. His seminal vesicles, which had been storing semen for months, contracted violently within his testicles, and a thick, hot semen, like volcanic lava, erupted instantly. This released all the pent-up anger and resentment he had been suppressing for so long, causing him to raise his head like a wolf and let out a terrifying, low, and wild howl: "Roar~~~~~~"






Time seemed to freeze at that moment. Zhang Zhengyu and Chen Huijia were like fossils, motionless in the man-on-top position of sexual intercourse. After a few minutes, Zhang Zhengyu, panting, pulled his penis, covered in their bodily fluids, out of Chen Huijia's vagina. The whitish semen mixed with vaginal fluid and red blood immediately flowed out slowly. Only then did Zhang Zhengyu realize that his penis had been torn and bleeding, and was throbbing with pain. This was clearly the result of his reckless and forceful thrusting!






Seeing this tragic scene, he was filled with mixed emotions: the relationship between a man and a woman should naturally involve mutual affection and the union of body and soul in a loving environment. However, he never expected that his first sexual encounter with Chen Huijia would turn into intense hatred after his sincere love was repeatedly hurt. This caused the loveless sexual act to become an aggressive and violent one, ultimately resulting in a lose-lose situation.





Since he was bleeding, Chen Huijia, who had been assaulted, must have suffered even more, which is why she covered her face and sobbed softly after slowly regaining consciousness. In the past, Zhang Zhengyu would have softened and embraced her, sincerely apologizing for the violence he had inflicted on her. But now he was completely unmoved, his face as cold and ruthless as the gusts of cold wind blowing from afar. He simply stood up woodenly, dressed, and tidied his appearance before coldly turning away and disappearing into the night without looking back. He left her, disheveled, on the cold stage littered with love letters filled with tender affection written by Zhang Zhengyu, alone in the cold night, savoring the bitter wine she had brewed with her own foolishness and arrogance.


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