Roujia's Diary

Author : 　　Roujia Word Count :
4816

********** ... This feels like a past lover confessing their love to me, saying, "Baby, darling, call me husband." But this time, the confession is completely different; it's "You slut, you little bitch, call me master." Just like in the article, I first acted as master in chat. I didn't call him that, because once I did, it would be hard to turn back. Wasn't that how it was done in the article? First, call him master online, then meet in person. At first, I didn't accept it, but I gradually got used to it. He got me in just a few days of chatting. I'm so pathetic. If I keep going with this guy, I 'll gradually accept it psychologically. It's only been a few days. For convenience, I'll call the online friend I chat with "Heartbroken Person," and I'll call that mysterious person "master" in quotes because I haven't called him master yet. When I do call him master, I 'll remove the quotes. The day I call him master will be the day my heart is conquered by him. "The Heartbroken Man" asked me to be his "master," and I told him I "didn't intend to call him master." I'm such submissive; we're such good friends and I wouldn't call him that, but after knowing him for only a few days, I want to call him master. What do I like about "master"? I can't explain it, it's like the kind of relationship between a submissive and a dominant. People who aren't into this kind of relationship can't understand. This is dangerous, isn't it? It's only been a few days, and I already have the urge to call him master. I don't want to play the master with the heartbroken man , but I'd willingly call this mysterious man master. He said he dared to say that I would definitely let the "master" fuck me, let him be my master and play with me. That's how I am; I can't force myself to do things I don't like, but I'll do what I like seriously. Soon, very soon, with another tease, the word "master" will just slip out of my mouth. The heartbroken man and I are so close, and he's even online, yet I'm unwilling to be his master. But I'm willing to be his "master," which shows I'm a genuine submissive. I wrote that I refuse multiple masters and only recognize one master. I'll become his bitch, serving him wholeheartedly. The feeling of being his lover with the heartbroken man will be gone. The heartbroken man is a failure. He liked me so much, he accepted everything I liked. I like BDSM, he wanted to be my master, even a net slave, but I felt nothing. I liked him the moment I met this mysterious man. No one can force someone to do what they don't want . I do what I like seriously. In reality, even if someone likes me and puts in so much effort and money, I still don't care. This heartbroken man has been devoted to me for so long, and I've never sent him a single photo of myself , never even seen my breasts. All I've seen are photos from years ago. This mysterious man is so lucky. I accepted him emotionally, and soon I called him master. He ravaged my full breasts and licked my cunt. He was sexually powerful , his big cock fucking my cunt until I squirted. I knelt obediently like a bitch, my master fucking me from behind. He ejaculated in my mouth and made me swallow it, ejaculated in my vagina and made me lick the semen, urinated , and slapped my round ass. I felt an indescribable pleasure, beyond emotion and sexual stimulation. The heartbroken man wanted to play the master, calling me a slut, a bitch, but I felt nothing. He started teasing me, calling me a slut, and my pussy got wet. Soon he would tease me again, calling me a slut and making me call him master. Later, I shyly called him , just like in the stories. He had successfully trained me. Next was meeting, just like in the stories, arranging a place for him to train me. At first, I was reserved, but it was very exciting. Later, he started anal sex, playing with me to a degree that I could accept. If it really happened, he would definitely tell my mother. I can't trust him too much. Does he mean he won't tell? My mother might tell your husband. Even if she doesn't, I will listen to the master's agreement with my husband and sister. I feel like 's much easier for him to fuck me than for others because I am a masochist. I have a strong sex drive, but I have a clean lifestyle. If I become his bitch, I won't be seen as who I used to be in everyone's eyes. I need to think this through carefully. No secrets stay hidden forever. My husband and father-in-law thought no one knew about , but I found out anyway. If it were just with someone online, it wouldn't be so bad—he's a real person to me, and he knows my mother. But if it's with me, the secrecy is even lower. At the very least, he has my life in his hands, and I'm under his control. If nothing's wrong, it's fine, but if I don't do what he wants, it'll be a trigger. He says he's been observing and investigating me for a long time. He's been watching me since he met my mother. No wonder he knows me so well just from my appearance; he's been watching me for years, finding out everything from my mother and husband . It's terrifying. For the past few years, I've been living under someone else's watchful eye and surveillance. What he said makes sense. I am a submissive, just undeveloped. Once developed, I'll be like my mother. He's a professional BDSM practitioner; the psychology of BDSM is different from that of ordinary people. I'm probably mildly masochistic, not intensely fascinated. I like freedom and don't like being restrained by anyone. I can accept submissives, but only if I have feelings for someone I like . BDSM is secondary. Besides BDSM, there's probably nothing about him that I like. I don't know, but I vaguely feel he's my type. He wants to use BDSM to get me to accept it psychologically, only sexually. It doesn't have the passion of my previous relationship with my boyfriend. I'm not that easy to accept emotionally. Right now, it's not about whether I accept it or not ; it's about not knowing what will happen in the future, not knowing if I'll accept it. Seeing that I wasn't averse to his teasing, he knew the time was right and said he wanted to see me. He wants to see me so soon? He thinks he's sure he's won me over before meeting me. He's so confident. It's too fast! It's only been a few days . I'm not even mentally prepared for the meeting. I didn't agree. Wanting to see me so soon only shows how confident he is, thinking he's got me figured out. I was incredibly curious about who he was and what he looked like. What was there to be afraid of in meeting him? He wasn't going to eat me. Seeing that I didn't agree, he assumed I was shy and didn't know how to play the submissive role, so he said, "Little bitch, don't worry. You won't have to do anything right away, and you won't have to kneel or crawl to obey my commands. We'll start as equals. Do you like that?"

"I'll do whatever you want."

I didn't expect him to want to have sex with me as soon as we met. I said I wouldn't see
him, and we could talk about it later. If I hadn't been reserved and agreed to meet him, what would he have done to me? Thinking of this, my body trembled slightly. I pulled my nightgown up
to my chest, revealing a pair of trembling, white, tender breasts. Soft breasts, pale areolas, and tiny,
delicate .

I gently grasped my white, tender breasts and slowly rubbed them. I asked him to send me a photo. He said in a few days. He said okay,
in a few days. Now I want his photo. Besides seeing who this mysterious person is, I have another expectation.
I really want to see what my "master" looks like. Is he handsome? Is he as I imagine him? If the photo has an
indescribable air of masterly authority, and I fall in love with him, what should I do? Even if he's just average-looking, I think I'll still like him.
It's not his appearance that I like, but the inexplicable feeling he has for me. Thinking of my "master's" appearance,
my sensitive clitoris swelled, and I shyly twisted my body slightly. It's ridiculous. I
don't what he looks like. This bizarre way he pursued me—calling me a slut, making me give in to my lust,
calling me a little bitch, making me feel subservient. He seemed to know I wanted to see his photos, deliberately making me anxious
for days.

He said to me, "Little bitch, I'll send you a picture of your mother, this bitch. Want to see it?"

I shyly said yes. He sent a picture of my mother, kneeling, her face only
half visible. It was indeed my mother, dressed scantily, looking very submissive, like a tamed bitch. But it looked
like it was from several years ago, probably before I got married.

Seeing the photo, I believed him even more. It seemed my mother really had become his bitch. I
told him about my husband, father-in-law, and my mother having sex. He deleted it again. I said I'd send it again, but he said he couldn't
, that he had to protect her privacy. I'm her daughter; what is there for her not to trust? Honestly, isn't SM supposed to be about
mutual trust and sincerity? He doesn't trust me at all.

Seeing photos of my mother like this disgusts me. I already had a bad impression of her, and our relationship was distant. Now,
seeing her looking like a subservient bitch only makes me feel worse. If I really accepted it, I think he would make me and my mother do
this together. I don't want him to play with me and my mother together. He would have a different mindset. Just thinking about
my mother becoming his bitches would be incredibly arousing for him. Even if I were a masochist, I couldn't accept
kneeling like this with my mother for him to play with.

As I ran my fingers along the entrance of my wet vagina, I imagined him doing this to me in the future. I was dressed
scantily, exposing my big butt and breasts, kneeling and calling him "master," and he called me a bitch, and I looked completely submissive. I felt
a little aroused, and as I touched my vagina, my soft breathing became heavy.

I asked him to send me a picture of his penis. Would he? I really want to see what his big penis looks like, but I wouldn't ask him to send it
willingly . It's too embarrassing to say it out loud. He might send it in the future, and he definitely has
the urge to show me his penis, the urge to tease me.

He dared to call me, dared to talk to me about this, so he knew I wouldn't tell my husband, and he knew I was a suitable
submissive. The submissive in the article started out like me, even disliking, hating, and unable to accept it, but
willingly obeying her master. That's the magic of submissives; he's very accurate. I'm sure I'm a submissive, though my feelings aren't as intense as in
the article . But if I accept training, I can become a submissive. My mother didn't understand this at first either
. I don't know if I'm willing; it's completely different from all my previous experiences. I have
something I haven't fully released.

I probably won't become his bitch. If I become his submissive, everything will change. I'll lose my dignity.
The dominant will be the master, and I must absolutely obey. My body, soul, and humanity will all be trampled on by him.
I can't accept eating urine and bread together in the article. Heartbroken netizens kept advising me, saying that if I were a submissive, I could definitely accept it,
and if I didn't, I would be punished. I even defended the "master," saying that not all submissives are like that.

The article says that an "S" advised her not to quit so easily, promising her more exciting projects and more thrilling
experiences , but she refused. The "M" in the article also eventually quit, quitting after just one time. I think if I accepted it
, it wouldn't be easy to quit; my mother let him play with her for years.

The article says that the "M" always thought she would receive some comfort or affirmation from her master—even just
a single word—which would make all her pain feel worthwhile, meaningful, and even an honor. Don't expect
gentleness or negotiation from the master; it's impossible. A master is a master. If he listens to you, is he still a master? I
don't know how my "master" will treat me; he hasn't shown his true nature yet. The "master"
is happy when he sees me humiliated and in pain. I feel humiliated, and in pain, I feel pleasure. I completely lose
my autonomy in my sexuality. A qualified sex slave should clearly understand that I am the master's sexual prisoner,
a tool for sexual release. My main job is to satisfy all of the master's sexual needs in order to obtain
my own sexual pleasure. I feel I'll accept him and become a non-slave, because I'm the kind of person
who can't be forced to do things I don't like. If this person's only purpose is sex, I wouldn't agree either. But he's a sadist, and he's discovered
my submissive psychology, so he can have my body and mind. Now the effect is there. I don't dislike him; after just
a few days of chatting, I accepted his infiltration methods, learned the materials he sent, and accepted his phone calls. I
've been chatting with heartbroken online friends for years, and I never call him, let alone speak to him.

After chatting with my "master," my heart couldn't calm down for a long time. He called me a slut, a little bitch, and
I almost called him master. Unconsciously, he's conquered my heart. I took off my pajamas and underwear
, looking at my snow-white body, long legs, slender waist, and firm, round breasts trembling
. The cleft under my pubic hair was tightly closed. From now on, my body no longer belongs solely to my husband; it belongs to my
master. Although I haven't given him a clear answer yet, I already have this thought in my heart.

I got into bed, knelt on it, then lay face down, my buttocks raised high. I reached behind me,
parting my already wet vulva. I'd masturbated like this before, but then I'd thought of past lovers or
other men. Now I thought of my master. "Come on, master, put it in, fuck me." I parted my vaginal opening,
widening the rosy orifice with my fingers. Although my master's tone wasn't forceful, his
quiet authority, his gentle yet firm strength, his calm composure, and the air of complete control he exuded...
The power was so overwhelming that I was willing to grovel at his feet, to be his slave, his dog. Thinking this, I
inserted my fingers into my vagina. Ah, it felt so good, like my master's huge cock was fucking me.

Since my hands were behind me, I reached forward, parted my thighs, and inserted my fingers into my vagina. My
breathing quickened. One hand slapped my buttocks from behind, while the other hand moved my fingers in and out of my vagina, occasionally
rubbing my clitoris. My juices flowed with the thrusting of my fingers. I lifted my round buttocks and swayed them, the words in my mind
blurting out, "My esteemed master, fuck my cunt! This bitch is cooperating with the thrusting of your big cock… ahhh!" My
body grew increasingly hot, my cunt continuously leaking juices. The tingling sensation inside my vagina made me scream, frantically
thrusting my sexy buttocks. I was about to cum, my juices gushing out. My white, round buttocks trembled rapidly, and I
collapsed onto the bed.

I have a strong sex drive, but I'm chaste and have never cheated. I've never undressed in video chat groups, nor have I ever
shown my nude body to anyone. I only showed it to people who were heartbroken by my husband's infidelity, because I discovered it then, and I
had a desire to get revenge on him. I liked him, and we had online text sex. My body wasn't cheated, but my mind
was. This time, I've cheated both physically and mentally. Although I haven't actually had sex with my
master yet, he's stolen my heart. Because this time it's a real person, and I'm even his bitch, after my orgasm, I lay limp on the bed
, feeling a sense of guilt towards my husband. It's as if I really let my master fuck my cunt.

August 13, 2016

- August 6, 2016: Day 1, he said he wanted to subdue me; Day 8, he sent me articles on female submissive development,
taught me SM knowledge, and made me write female submissive evaluation reports. He called me a slut, a little bitch, and I almost called him master. I fantasized for the first
time about my master masturbating on my stomach.

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