"Light and thin" my mom

I'm an only child, but I'm not close to my mother. She's a bit neurotic and unpredictable. When she gets angry, she curses indiscriminately without any reason, and her insults are particularly harsh and hurtful. When she's in a good mood, she's like a completely different person. But even when she's in a good mood, we don't have the closeness typical of mothers and sons; we rarely have physical contact, let alone hugs. Having a mother like that, I've always been obedient and cautious, afraid to provoke her. She's not particularly beautiful, and not very tall, but at work she's outgoing and outspoken, and seems quite likable. My father is weak and a pushover, always getting scolded by my mother, lacking any masculinity.
My father often travels for work, and my mother and I both seem to dislike sleeping alone, easily frightened. I remember sleeping with my mother in the summer when I was in second or third grade. She only wore a bra and underwear to bed, revealing her ample body. I was young then, and being closer to her, I would mischievously step on her shoulder when she sat on the edge of the bed taking off her clothes, and she wouldn't say a word. In my memory, she was quite sexy, even wearing only a bra.
Men often experience a stirring of desire and curiosity about sex during puberty, and for me, an only child, the only mature woman I could have close contact with was my mother. I fantasized about her body back then. I fantasized about being caressed by my mother. Kids that age probably don't fantasize that much; their minds are just filled with intimate gestures. I also fantasized about my parents divorcing and my mother living with me (this wasn't unrealistic, considering how much she seemed to be cursing my father every day).
One day, when my father wasn't home, I somehow became bold and went to "make a move" on my mother. She was preparing vegetables for cooking, and I went up to her, hugged her, and talked to her (I hadn't done this since I was about five). She seemed to be in a good mood, laughing and saying I was being affectionate. Later, she even told my father with a smile. For some reason, my father was very sensitive about this and became unhappy. Later, he said some very hurtful things to me, probably related to this incident. Once, my mother jokingly said she wouldn't talk to him anymore and would live with me, which made him very angry. Now that I'm middle-aged, looking back, I think my dad was too petty. Many things are better left unsaid, especially the bond between mother and son. Maybe it's because he lacks masculinity, is insecure about his own charm, and fears losing love that he's so concerned. Isn't that a vicious cycle?
That time I hugged my mom, I didn't dare touch her inappropriately, just held her shoulder. I also remember another time I eavesdropped and spied. One noon, I felt they were about to make love, so I went to their bedroom door to eavesdrop. I heard my mom laugh out loud, then start whining and acting coquettishly, but there were no other sounds. They seemed to be quite careful during their lovemaking so I couldn't hear. Or maybe they always did it when I was at school and not around at noon? Another time, I was showering in the bathroom, which faced their bedroom door. The curtain wasn't completely transparent, and to save electricity, they didn't allow me to turn on the light while showering. So I was in the dark, and my mom seemed quite happy that day, changing her underwear one piece after another in front of my dad (my dad was sitting next to her, and she was standing). Through the curtain, I could only vaguely see a glimpse of my mother's bare back, her bra off, her rounded shoulders. It was incredibly arousing; my heart was pounding in my chest.
My mother wouldn't deliberately go to other rooms to change clothes, but she would always turn her back to me. We didn't share a room to change often, so I did have opportunities to see her bare back, but I never stared, afraid of getting scolded.
Speaking of which, there was a moment in high school that left a deep impression on me. As I mentioned earlier, our bathroom faced their bedroom, and their bedroom had a television on the furniture near the entrance. Back then, they didn't let me watch TV much, afraid it would affect my studies. To avoid bothering me, they would only occasionally turn it on and watch it standing up for a while. I was pitiful then; if the TV was on when I passed their bedroom, I would also peek at the program. It was the height of summer. My mom was wearing a long loungewear dress, no bra on top, and briefs on the bottom (of course, those long dresses were thick enough that you couldn't see any "nipples"). I, on the other hand, was just shirtless in my underwear. I went to the bathroom, and she was standing there seemingly engrossed in watching TV, so I stood there watching too, as usual. Then, my mom did something completely unexpected: she actually lifted her long dress up with one hand, completely exposing her right breast! (I was standing to her right.) I should mention that my mom's breasts are at least a C cup, and very firm, which is why she can always wear revealing clothes in the summer without a bra, and whether she wears one or not is completely invisible from the outside—that shows how firm they are. Round, big, and firm. I also noticed that her nipples were rather dark. Even now, after seeing so many women and so many nude photos, I still think she was on the darker side. Even
as she lifted her dress, she still seemed "obsessed" with watching TV. But I'm certain of one thing: she lifted her clothes when she saw me out of the corner of her eye. That action, if I hadn't been there, wouldn't have looked lewd; it was like someone lifting their clothes to cool off on a hot day, casually scratching themselves. It was like she ignored my presence and showed me her body, only wearing her underwear. You might ask if she really didn't see me, or if she was just too engrossed in watching TV. Impossible. Of course I know her; she's not stupid, she's very clever, and I was standing so close (only a meter away).
My immediate reaction was to walk away. It was a conditioned reflex, a reflection of my childhood upbringing. I didn't dare to "act like a hooligan."
Even in my twenties, I would occasionally sleep in the same bed with my mother when my father was away on business. For example, when it was raining and thundering, my mother would be scared. She had switched to wearing crop tops that showed her midriff. And we wouldn't do anything intimate while sleeping together; I didn't even pay attention to her. As I said before, my mother and I weren't close.
I now believe that incest between mothers and sons is quite common. Just think about it this way: even if I'm not close to my mother and don't come from a single-parent family, similar scenarios still occur. What if I were an only child in a single-parent family? What if the mother-son relationship was close? What if I were even bolder? Remember, Liu Bei said, "The bond between mother and son is innate." Whether intimate actions stem from affection or sexual motives is unclear from appearance alone; sometimes it's a combination of both. In a close single-parent family, if a high school son were to encounter his mother undressing, he might very well pounce on her and hug her half-naked body—and that still probably "doesn't prove anything." Between such physical contact, things can naturally happen… I've seen some men say they've mischievously grabbed their mothers' breasts since childhood, which is perfectly normal for mothers and sons with a normal relationship. I've heard many stories like this. (Indeed, most of these situations are just playful teasing and pranks). Humans are born with breast milk. I once had a lover who said her husband was very close to his mother, and he would lie in his mother's arms and touch her breasts in front of his wife. If it's private, when his wife isn't around, he probably does it. It's really hard to tell the difference. At this level of intimacy, showering together should be natural. So, if he cuddles with his mother, I think at least she'll think masturbating is no big deal...
[The End]

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"Light and thin" my mom

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