【Cold River Snow】(Part Two)

Part Two: One day in 1976, I remember it was summer. I was in elementary school then, almost graduating
. One day after school, my classmates and I were playing jump rope under the big locust tree at the old temple entrance. A worm fell onto my arm, and
I endured the pain to go home and apply medicine. The courtyard gate was locked, and assuming my mother hadn't come home from work yet, I opened the gate myself and went into the courtyard.
As I entered the main room, I heard heavy, panting sounds coming from the east room. I remembered those sounds vividly
because they were the sounds my father and mother used to make when they fought in bed many nights. Although I was young then, I vaguely
understood some things about men and women. Adults often joked, asking if I had seen my parents fighting in bed,
and I would usually blush and walk away, avoiding answering. So, those familiar, rough panting sounds immediately
made me blush again. I was annoyed that my parents were so indecent, fighting in bed in broad daylight, but at the same time
, I couldn't suppress my curiosity and wanted to find out what exactly happened when men and women fought.
So I secretly crept to the window of the east room in the courtyard. The curtains were drawn, blocking most of the light and shadow,
but a sliver of light remained in the left corner, just enough to peek through. I pressed my face close, held my breath, lowered my voice, and
focused my gaze. I saw two pale, fleshy creatures writhing on the bed. Because of the heat,
beads of sweat slid down their fair skin onto the bed, soaking the once-cool straw mat in large patches
. My mother's voice was a suppressed growl, which then turned into a long moan. The intermittent
panting mixed with the woman's uncontrollable cries made my face instantly turn bright red! I was about to turn away
, but just as I was about to turn my head, I saw the face of the man on top of my mother—it wasn't my father
, but Director Li from the commune. I was stunned into silence. Suppressing my anger, I covered my mouth with my hand,
turned, and ran away, trying to stifle my humiliation and shock!
That day, with tears streaming down my face, I ran alone to Xiafang Village to find Yanqiu. I didn't go home; I
slept directly in Yanqiu's thatched house.
I didn't understand the relationship between Yanqiu and my family until I was in high school. Yanqiu's ancestors and my mother's
family had a past connection. When my father-in-law participated in the revolution, during the Crossing the Yangtze River Campaign, my maternal grandfather was his contact.
After Yanqiu's family settled in Shanghai, although they were too busy with work to visit their hometown, my maternal grandfather
had taken my mother to Shanghai a few times when she was young, visiting Yanqiu's family and bringing them some local produce.
People in that era were both simple and complex. Yanqiu's father got into trouble during the Great Turmoil, which implicated my maternal grandfather
. Unexpectedly, my mother, with a sense of justice, reported my maternal grandfather's alleged crimes to the Revolutionary Committee, resulting in my maternal grandfather
drowning himself in a lake. My mother, however, rose rapidly through the ranks under the patronage of Director Li of the Revolutionary Committee, eventually becoming a member of the commune's Party Committee and then
the Women's Director. How ridiculous!
To this day, I still don't understand how my mother had the nerve to accept Yanqiu, nor do I know why Yanqiu chose to return to Fangwan Town when he was sent down to the countryside . Anyway, in that chaotic yet simple era, my childhood 　　passed quietly
under Yanqiu's companionship and guidance. 　　The time I secretly witnessed my mother having an affair, it was the first time I didn't go home; Yanqiu took me back the next day. Later, 　　I got used to going to his place alone, listening to his stories, listening to him talk about the outside world, listening to him tell many, many 　　things I had never heard before. At that time, he was so different from others in my eyes, so unique 　　. I am so fortunate that in my childhood, I had such a kind older brother to accompany me through my ignorant years! 　　I know that the ignorant years will always pass, but I didn't know that it would end so hastily, and 　　the changes that followed were so rushed and chaotic. 　　In 1978, the Great Turmoil ended. I also began to develop and grow up. And so, the girl's various 　　emotions quietly entered my heart, and an indelible figure unexpectedly 　　occupied my heart. But, he was a city person, a Shanghainese! The educated youth had begun to return to their hometowns, and 　　Yanqiu's father, according to my mother, was also beginning the investigation to exonerate him. He was going back! 　　I was happy for him, yet anxiously worried about when he would leave and never return. In this 　　state of anxiety and turmoil, I couldn't help but think of him, so after school I took an oxcart to Xiafang. 　　When I saw him, Chen Daya was talking to him in his yard. I didn't listen, just nodded to him and 　　went into his house. I saw bundles of books tied with straw rope piled in a corner, and clothes 　　scattered messily on the straw bed waiting to be packed. Was he leaving? My heart clenched, and then a sharp pain struck me 　　. I hugged my schoolbag and sat down on the ground, overwhelmed with loneliness. 　　After he finished talking to Chen Daya, he went into the house and saw me sitting on the floor. His glasses darted around, and he seemed to understand what I was 　　thinking. Without a word, he reached out to help me up, but when his hand touched my bottom, he pulled away as if he'd been electrocuted. 　　"Runyun, you…" 　　My face flushed instantly. I could feel my bottom was wet; it wasn't from wetting my pants, so I knew my 　　first period had started. I quickly straightened up and went to the inner room, lowered the curtain, and said to him, "Brother, get 　　me a pair of underwear." 　　He didn't answer for a while. Curious about what he was doing, I lifted a corner of the curtain and peeked through the crack. He was taking 　　a pair of scissors and cutting a cotton towel he'd brought from Shanghai that he'd always been reluctant to use. He cut the towel into 　　strips about half a palm's width, casually gesturing until he felt they were about right, before taking out a pair of similar cotton underwear from the laundry basket 　　. 　　My face was red as I took his underwear and the tampons. He was really willing to spend money. Cotton clothing wasn't cheap back then 　　; even with cloth ration coupons, it was hard to buy, let alone such well-made clothing. 　　After we left, he told me his plans. He was planning to leave Xiafang. Shanghai had a return quota 　　, and he had inquired with relatives and friends; he met the requirements. So, he would be leaving soon. 　　I don't remember how I felt when I heard his words. We talked by the haystack in the yard 　　until the stars appeared. I don't know where the courage came from, but suddenly, as if possessed, I turned my head and kissed him. 　　I was only 13 years old that year. The magic of love clouded my judgment. I followed 　　the instructions in the book "The Heart of a Young Girl" that I had secretly read by my mother's bedside, squeezing my tongue into his mouth, greedily sucking on his lips, his teeth, his tongue...

The faint smell of smoke in his mouth momentarily intoxicated me.
After a long while, while he was still stunned and nearly in shock, before he could recover, I forcefully
shoved him away and ran back to Fangwan alone…

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【Cold River Snow】(Part Two)

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