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The Fool's Happiness 

"Sweet mustard, eat cabbage. Touch that and come back..."
"Mom..."
I opened my eyes, waking from the dream. The dormitory was still dark, and no one was there. Suddenly, I remembered that today
was already the second day of school holiday. Lately, I don't know why, I keep having dreams from my childhood. I picked up my phone
and checked the time; it was almost afternoon.
There were two missed calls on my phone, both from my mom. It seems like it's been almost a year since I went home.
Should I go back this holiday? It's so annoying... I drew back the curtains. The sky outside was very gloomy. Looking at
the missed calls on my phone, I fell into a confused daze...
I took out my key, opened the iron gate, and returned home. To my surprise, I saw my dad sitting on the sofa. My somewhat balding dad
was slightly taken aback to see me come home so early.
"Dad, you're not at work today?"
"I'm off today. I'm going on a business trip out of town for a few days of training tomorrow. You guys got a break so early. Come on,
have you had lunch? There's still some food on the table, it's still warm."
"Yes, yes, I've eaten. Is your department always going out for training? By the way, where are Mom and my brother?"
"Your mom took my brother to the hospital for a check-up, they'll be back soon." Dad put down the party magazine he was holding .
"By the way, Xiao An's illness has improved recently, you need to take good care of your brother..."
"Okay, I know."
"How's your studies lately? Has the teacher...?"
"Okay, okay, just so-so." To avoid Dad nagging me, I gave a few perfunctory replies and quickly
moved my luggage to my bedroom.
I closed the bedroom door, turned on the computer, and for some reason, I felt inexplicably irritable as soon as I got home.
My brother's illness has been treated for over ten years without any improvement. All you do is worry about him, everything revolves around
him. You might as well take care of him for the rest of your lives.
While I was engrossed in my computer game, Mom and my younger brother had returned
without me even noticing the bedroom door being pushed open.
"Xiao Qi, when did you get back? Come help Mom with the bathroom."
"Oh, I'm busy right now, I'll do it later."
Just as I was playing, a hand suddenly reached out and placed a strange drawing on my keyboard,
causing my game character to be killed by a monster. I slapped his hand, and my brother, still holding the strange drawing,
kept calling "Mom" and ran to the living room, looking a little scared.
Seriously, this brain-dead brother of mine is so annoying!
Today, Mom was wearing a black and white striped, slightly sheer, fitted sweater
, a black skirt, black stockings, and trendy black short leather shoes. She looked elegant yet sexy, radiating mature feminine charm. Although
Mom is almost thirty-eight, she looks like a young woman, full of womanly allure. Having such a beautiful mother is
something I'm very proud of. Honestly, Mom is good to me, if it weren't for…
"Xiao Qi, Xiao Qi?" Mom scratched her permed, long hair behind her ear and turned to see me.
"What did you call me for?" I snapped out of my reverie, a little impatient.
"Come help Mom take that basket down from there, be careful."
"Okay." I tiptoed slightly and easily took it down. Before I knew it, at seventeen
, I was already 1.75 meters tall, almost half a head taller than Mom.
"What's in the basket? Is there anything else?"
"It's the Chinese medicine for your brother's bath. You should rest now. Mom bought you a lot of your favorite dishes today
, and here's something else for you..."
"Okay." I was about to leave when I suddenly saw a note on the ground. I picked it up and saw that
it had the names of some Chinese medicines like "exposed waist" and "ginkgo" scrawled on it. At the bottom, it said something about "continuous," "sensory," and "stimulation
." This kind of note was the same as the folk remedies that Mom used to bring back. I wondered where Mom had found this
folk remedy. I saw that Mom was busy organizing the medicines, so I put the folk remedy note back on top.
Dad went to rest in the bedroom sometime ago. Only my mentally challenged brother and I were in the living room. He seemed
oblivious to his surroundings, squatting on the low table in the living room, scribbling on paper with a pen. I heard that his
birth was very difficult; he was born with cerebral palsy, a condition that's incurable. Over the years, Dad has spent
countless amounts of money without any improvement. Mom quit her job early to care for him, trying various folk remedies
, but nothing has worked. Now fourteen, my brother has the mental capacity of a child under a few years old.
Mom has to help him bathe and use the toilet, and sometimes he even sleeps with adults.
People have always laughed at me for having a mentally challenged brother. I used to always side with him.
When he was bullied while playing downstairs, I was always the one who stood up for him, even fighting for him quite a few times. One day, I came home from school and saw
Mom tightly hugging my brother in the bedroom, crying and saying something like, "It's all Mom's fault, Mom is sorry
... Xiao An... Mom is here..." I couldn't understand what she meant at the time, assuming my brother had been bullied again and had come to Mom to complain
.
As I grew older, I noticed that my parents were incredibly kind to my mentally challenged younger brother, sometimes to the point of forgetting about me
, his older brother. They bought him countless toys designed for his intellectual disability but rarely bought me anything. Even my computer was something I had
to save up from years of New Year's money to buy myself, while a single treatment for him could cost as much as several computers I owned.
Although my father often tried to reason with me, I still felt a bit... something, especially with my mother.
She doted on my brother to the core. When he was sick, she would stay up all night with him, but if I was sick
, well, a little medicine would do. I always gave in when my brother took my things,
and she often took him to amusement parks, while I was stuck at home studying. I didn't want that! Perhaps out of jealousy, one
time I bullied my brother at home, stepping on him. My mother came home and saw me, immediately slapping
me across the face. I started crying and screaming uncontrollably, not hearing a word she said, only noticing her
red eyes.
Now that I'm older, I still feel a bit...repulsed by my mentally challenged younger brother. Maybe it's rebelliousness, but I still sometimes
argue with adults. Last time, I argued with my mother and didn't come home for a year. My brother, on the other hand, never argues with the family. He
listens to my mother very much. Apart from sometimes doing some inexplicable and mentally challenged things, he spends most of his time watching educational videos.
An animated film.
My mentally challenged younger brother, who had been standing next to me with a grin, tilted his head and tossed a piece of white paper onto
the table in front of me, muttering something like "name...name...name," I couldn't understand what he was doing at all.
"Don't block my view of the TV," I frowned.
"Look...ge...ge...brother," my brother mumbled, barely able to finish his sentence. I chuckled.
"Your brother wants you, his older brother, to see how he wrote his name. Xiao An can write on paper now!"
Mom came out of the kitchen wearing an apron, looking at my brother with loving eyes, one hand stroking his
cheek.
"Kiss...Mom, Mom," my brother said, leaning his face towards Mom.
"Xiao An, Xiao Qi, you're both Mom's good sons," Mom said, kissing my brother on the cheek
. When she kissed me, I dodged, and Mom gently pinched my cheek.
"Mom, I...I want to feel good," my brother suddenly blurted out. Mom pretended to be angry and looked at him, and my brother
pouted and ran away.
This mentally challenged boy can write now? I glanced at the table; a
faint, crooked character for "peace" was written on a pure white piece of paper.
The atmosphere was heavy after dinner. Dad, a rigid and taciturn man, even while eating, kept reading the Party
newspaper. Mom, on the other hand, was taking care of my mentally challenged brother, who was watching cartoons while sipping his
medicine-laced soup. I ate by myself, then went back to my bedroom to play on the computer.
"Xiao Qi," Mom called, pushing open the bedroom door and entering, carrying some kind of garment.
"Hmm," I replied, engrossed in my computer game.
"Come try on the clothes I picked out for you today."
"Oh, just leave them there."
"Be good, come try them on. Mom specially chose these for you."
I stood in front of the mirror, and Mom adjusted my collar and other things. Every now and then, I could feel her
breath on my face. Mom's scent was still very pleasant. Looking at her delicate and beautiful face, the familiar fragrance
, and her familiar tone, my face inexplicably turned slightly red, as if reminding me of when Mom sang
nursery rhymes to me when I was little…
===================================================================================
The next day, I woke up very early, hungry. I put on my clothes and went to the kitchen to find something to eat. My parents' bedroom door was open, but
no one was inside. It seemed Dad had gone on a business trip a long time ago. The bathroom next to the kitchen constantly smelled of Chinese medicine
, and I could hear my silly little brother giggling. Mom was probably giving him another herbal bath. But—
I glanced at the clock on the wall; it was only 10 a.m. A bath so early? I wondered what kind of
folk remedy Mom was using.
"Don't move," came a faint sound from the closed bathroom door.
"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy…" Just as I finished eating and was about to go back to my bedroom to sleep
, something strange happened in the bathroom. My little brother kept calling for Mommy.
"Mommy is so pretty, Mommy is so…comfortable…I need to pee." What a strange little brother. Sleepiness washed over me, and
I went back to my bedroom to continue sleeping.
In the afternoon, Mom took my little brother to visit her sister, Aunt Zhou. I stayed home alone, playing on the computer all day
. Mom didn't bring my little brother back until 6 or 7 p.m. As soon as he got home, he complained of being sleepy and wanted to go to bed. But I
always felt something was… off about my little brother. He spoke much more fluently after each bath, and his cerebral palsy seemed to be improving
a little. Mom seemed especially happy, smiling for several days.
That night, I was sleeping soundly in bed when suddenly I heard someone calling "Mom" from my younger brother's room.
My silly brother had woken up. I heard the door to my parents' bedroom open. My mother went to my brother's room first, and after
saying something, he stopped crying. It seemed like my mother took him to my parents' bedroom to sleep, because I heard their
footsteps. That silly brother, all he does all day is call for Mom! Mom, he's such a useless thing! I could hear
some of my brother's voice coming from my parents' bedroom. I tossed and turned in bed, unable to fall back asleep, so I secretly got up
to go online. Soon I felt the urge to pee, so I quietly went to the bathroom. As I passed my parents' bedroom, I thought I heard…
"Are you happy now, An'an?" "Go to sleep."
"Mom…it's so…smooth."
"Be good, go to sleep early, don't disturb your brother's rest, and don't say anything, okay? Otherwise, Mom will be very angry
."
"Mom, no…no…Xiao An is the best, Xiao An likes Mom…it's so soft…so…silk…stockings."
Stockings? I wondered if I'd misheard; there was no sound coming from my parents' bedroom. Back in my room, I
didn't even feel like going online; something felt off.
Early the next morning, my mom dragged me out of my warm bed to go shopping. Although I was still half asleep and
a little reluctant, I decided to go with her and my
mentally challenged brother, considering the generous allowance she'd promised. Suddenly, I noticed a pair of black stockings in the trash bag in the living room. I instantly
snapped awake. I glanced at my mom; she was tidying her bag, while my brother seemed
oblivious, watching TV and giggling. I had an urge to pick up the stockings and examine them, but
thinking about yesterday's events, my feelings were complicated.
Because of my mentally challenged brother, Mom didn't take us to the crowded pedestrian shopping mall. Instead, she took us to
an old street near our neighborhood with many vendors. My brother drooled over the food and
reached for anything interesting. I didn't want to walk with him, and occasionally old women would point and whisper behind our backs.
Mom was wearing a leather dress today. Her curvaceous figure and full breasts were particularly eye-catching. Her full
breasts stood erect under the thin fabric, trembling slightly with her breath, vaguely revealing the shape of her bra. Her round
buttocks arched gracefully, tightly protruding from her underwear. Her plump hips exuded a
fiery allure. Her fair face was flushed, full of the charm unique to young women. Her eyes seemed to hold
pools of autumn water, and a faint smile always played on her lips. She looked much younger than her actual age. Standing at over 1.6
meters tall, with shoulder-length, neatly permed hair, her tight-fitting leggings accentuated her full, curvaceous figure.
She looked both voluptuous and fair-skinned, yet also shapely and sexy. The long, rounded white stockings exuded a thrilling
allure. "Xiao Qi, what do you think of this one? This one's fine too," Mom said, holding   my younger brother's hand as she helped me choose pants
at a stall .   "Okay, let me look around some more," I replied absentmindedly.   "Should we try this one on…?" The pants vendor gave my mother a few lecherous glances.   "Mom… I need to feel better down there… I need to pee," my brother, who had just been playing with a pinwheel, looked like he was about to pee.   "Mom told you this wasn't the time… sigh, you… Xiao Qi, take this, Mom's taking my brother to the toilet," Mom's   expression was slightly unnatural. I took the bag and realized that my brother's talk of peeing might not be so simple.   We arrived at one of those public restrooms with individual stalls. Before my brother and mother went in, I had a sudden idea.   "Mom, I need to use the restroom too, why don't I go first?" I said, and went into the stall. I looked around,   took out my phone, turned on camera mode, then wrapped the phone in a tissue until only the camera lens remained. I placed it near the ventilation   window, where my mother, being short, definitely couldn't see it.   Sure enough, after I came out, my mother and brother went in and didn't come out for a while. My brother looked very happy, while   my mother was expressionless, seemingly a little angry, but didn't say anything. As for me, after I took my phone back from the stall when they weren't looking   , I had a strange feeling in my heart…

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