The husband of the transgender girl Mei'er

Tian Nanqi, who had been paying close attention to her husband's behavior since he transitioned into a woman

, was truly shocked.

Her husband, with heartfelt sincerity, revealed his true feelings.

This was before the Spring Festival of 2000. After several days of careful investigation, Tian Nanqi finally discovered her husband

's secret. Every time her husband showered in the bathroom, he would lock the door from the inside. Earlier that year, her school organized

a trip . She returned two days earlier than scheduled. When she got home, she found her underwear washed and hung on a clothes rack by her husband.

Her husband often locked the bathroom door to change his underwear, instead of in bed… What was going on? The more she

thought about it, the felt. She decided to take action.

One night, her husband went into the bathroom to shower. Tian Nanqi suddenly pulled out a key and unlocked the door from the outside. Her husband was

wearing her bra, underwear, and pants, admiring himself in the mirror! Her blood rushed to her head. She rushed forward and slapped

her husband several times: "You're shameless! You're despicable! You're immoral!"

Lin Shuping squatted on the ground, helpless, his head buried in his chest. No matter how much Tian Nanqi berated him, he remained silent.

Tian Nanqi felt utterly humiliated. She locked the bedroom door and lay on the bed, weeping bitterly.

She couldn't believe her husband had a fetish for

women! At that moment, she truly wanted to commit suicide. A woman married to a husband who secretly wore women's underwear—she felt utterly ashamed. As she picked up scissors to cut her wrists, she suddenly heard her daughter

crying. She stopped: "If I die, what will happen to Xiao Lan? She'll only have a father who's like a woman.

What will she do in the future?"

Tian Nanqi didn't die. She couldn't abandon her daughter. She spent a sleepless night, her mind blank. I felt like I'd lost even the ability

to think .

Dawn broke. My husband came in. Lin Shuping knelt before Tian Nanqi, and after a thousand minutes of agonizing recounting:

"I've ruined you. But... I really didn't mean to. I was just helpless. Ever since elementary school, I've

liked being with girls. I liked girls' clothes. I liked everything girls liked. I especially liked girls

' mannerisms. As I got older, my upbringing didn't allow me to interact with girls much. I felt incredibly miserable.

In college , I often couldn't help but secretly look at female students on campus. In the dorm, the boys would make sexually

suggestive jokes. I got angry with them several times, feeling they were being too much. They all said

they had a physical reaction to seeing pretty female classmates. But I never had that kind of impulse. I just like looking at girls." Looking at their

clothes, the way they walked, their hair, the way they swayed and laughed.

Back then, I thought, "How wonderful it would be if I could be a girl!" ║

║At that time, I often went shopping alone, wanting to look at those beautiful women's clothes. Of course, I

didn't dare to openly look at or try them on like a girl. I could only watch from afar as beautiful women tried on the

clothes I longed for. Don't get angry saying this. I had no choice! ║Lin

Shuping looked up: ║I know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten married. I shouldn't have hurt you. I've researched

and read books. I know I have a fetish for women. My biggest wish is to become a woman someday.

But I don't dare tell my parents. They are both intellectuals who do scientific research. If I told them the truth,

they would commit suicide. They would never allow their son to have such behavior. Later, many people

introduced potential partners. I didn't even look at them. Later, Mom got angry. That's when I had to start looking for a partner.

I'm her only son, so of course she wants me to get married and have children. When I met you, I really liked you.

But it wasn't the kind of liking a man has for a woman. It was a liking without gender distinction. More precisely, it was my

womanly mindset liking you. I liked your quietness, your purity, your smile. At that time,

I was also having a fierce internal struggle. Was dating you hurting you? Later, I thought, maybe

being with , because I like you, I would revert to a manly mindset. At that time, I was certain of one thing: I

would definitely treat you well. And my parents would never allow me to remain unmarried for life. If I had to get married,

marrying you would be the happiest thing for me. And so, we got married.

║ ║ On our wedding night, I was in extreme pain. I understood that couples should make love. But... I

trembled all over just thinking about it. I was terrified. For those three nights, I pretended to be asleep. I was in so much pain.

Later, my mother found out about the problem. She thought I was just shy and didn't know I had a fetish for women. I promised

my mother.

You know, the first time I made love with you was almost like experiencing death. But, I love you after all.

I couldn't let you suffer. Under the control of this thought, I was able to successfully make love with you.

║ ║After we got married, I always secretly wore your underwear. When you weren't home, I would

walk around the room wearing your underwear. I felt extremely happy. I was happiest when I went shopping with you. I was happiest when I washed your

underwear. I was happiest when I was busy in the kitchen like a woman. Those were my happiest moments.

║ ║Later, after we had our daughter, Xiaolan, I suddenly found what it felt like to be a mother. A woman's clothes have to be

worn secretly. A woman can only think about them in her heart. Being a mother can be done openly and honestly. I've seen too many mothers taking care of

their children . Because I've always longed to be a mother. Then I finally had the opportunity. So I took on

all the responsibilities and obligations of a mother. You know, you taking care of our daughter makes me very unhappy. Because you've taken away

a part of my happiness as a mother. Now, you know everything. If you want a divorce, I'll agree. But you can't

tell my parents or relatives my secrets. And, I have one condition: give me Xiao Lan! Her

husband's words left Tian Nanqi without even the capacity for pain. She lay pale on the bed, gesturing for

her husband to leave. She wanted to lie alone for a while.

Choosing not to divorce, she understood this man

. She took three days off. Tian Nanqi lay in bed for three days, and of course, thought for three days. She was engaged in a fierce

internal struggle: She should divorce him. But what about Xiao Lan? She didn't dare tell her parents the truth. Her parents would be heartbroken.

They think Lin Shuping is a good man. My in-laws are so good to me. They'll be even more heartbroken. If we really divorce, Xiaolan

can't be with Lin Shuping. But... he hasn't done anything wrong. The book says that heterosexuality is a special kind of illness. Patients

suffer greatly. If I don't give him my daughter, he'll go crazy. If we divorce, I'll take my daughter. Remarrying doesn't guarantee Xiaolan won't be

hurt. If I don't remarry, what's the point of divorce?! Besides, will I ever have the interest and ability to fall in love with another man again in this lifetime

?

After thinking for several days, Tian Nanqi finally made a very painful decision: "I will give up love for the rest of my life. I

will live with this 'woman,' Lin Shuping! That way, my daughter will be happy, my parents will be happy,

and my in-laws will be happy. I will suffer alone, while my family will be happy."

Tian Nanqi sat down with Lin Shuping to discuss this matter. Lin Shuping was extremely grateful for her idea. He didn't want

to leave his daughter, nor did he want to cause his parents pain. This was the best outcome.

Three days before the Spring Festival in 2000, Tian Nanqi and Lin Shuping officially began living together. Of course, it was a shared living arrangement

within . They each had their own room in a two-bedroom apartment. Their daughter would take turns staying in their room. Of course, they would still eat together.

They couldn't let their parents and relatives know they were living together.

Three months later, Tian Nanqi sensed... Having achieved "liberation," Lin Shuping truly liberated himself. Whenever he wasn't

out caring for the children, he would hide in his room wearing women's clothes. These clothes no longer belonged to

Tian Nanqi ; they belonged to him. This made Tian Nanqi feel extremely awkward.

People often say, "Even a day as husband and wife brings a hundred days of kindness." After six months of adjustment, Tian Nanqi's aversion to Lin Shuping's behavior

lessened, replaced by more sympathy. He had to switch roles multiple times a day. Besides

stepping down as husband, he still had to play the roles of father, son, son-in-law, and man.

And the role he truly wanted to be was that of a woman. What to do? She couldn't bear to see her former (and now

nominally) husband suffer so much. She was trying to help him find relief.

Tian Nanqi consulted a lot of materials and learned that there were only two solutions for heterosexuality: one was psychological

therapy . If her psychological role could be reversed... He could either become a man again, or he could undergo sex reassignment surgery

to become a real woman. Tian Nanqi naturally chose the former.

Under Tian Nanqi's repeated persuasion and threats, Lin Shuping agreed to treatment, but it had to be kept secret. From

the autumn of 2000, Tian Nanqi accompanied Lin Shuping to mental hospitals and psychiatric hospitals frequently. A year and a half later,

to Tian Nanqi's surprise, these renowned doctors' psychological treatment plans not only failed to make Lin Shuping psychologically

a man, but instead gave him an even stronger desire to be a woman. He began to display feminine traits in public,

something he would never have dared to do before.

She truly sympathized with him, understanding his misfortune, his pain, and his desire. She

realized that Lin Shuping's problems could no longer be solved by psychological treatment. He needed sex reassignment surgery; otherwise, he would

suffer for the rest of his life. She thought: "I should help him. Help him completely escape his suffering. Help him find his true

happiness.

Sacrifice everything. Help my husband become a woman

." In the summer of 2002, Tian Nanqi told Lin Shuping her thoughts. Lin Shuping turned pale

: "No. My parents will find out. They won't be able to handle it."

Tian Nanqi was in great pain. She had persuaded her husband to undergo gender reassignment surgery. The pain was unbearable. However,

she thought it was worthwhile: "Shuping, I'll take care of Dad's job. Think about it. You've always wanted to be

a woman . How painful it would be if you couldn't! Besides, you can't hide it like before. Sooner or later, your parents will

find out the truth. It's better to have the surgery, leave this city, and everything will be fine."

Lin Shuping agreed to Tian Nanqi's suggestion. At this moment, the people Tian Nanqi least wanted to see were her parents-in-law.

But now, she had to see them and persuade them.

This day was one Tian Nanqi would never forget. It was the evening of August 23, 2002. She and

Lin Shuping arrived at her in-laws' house. She explained their purpose directly. Her mother-in-law immediately fainted on the sofa. Her father-in-law was also

panting heavily.

After her parents-in-law calmed down, Tian Nanqi spoke with tears in her eyes: "Mom and Dad, Shuping is my husband. After

this happened, the one who should be suffering the most is me. But I knew the truth years ago. I

almost died then. In these past few years, I've witnessed Shuping's pain and misfortune. I can't let him

suffer for my own sake. The same goes for you two. He's your son. You love him the most." " Can we bear to see him suffer for your sake

?"

The mother-in-law, holding Tian Nanqi, wept bitterly: "Why is our life so miserable? Now we have no choice but to accept our fate."

Tian Nanqi endured the pain and told her in-laws: "After the surgery, let Shuping go far south!

Tell him he went abroad. Tell Xiaolan he's dead. That's the only way. That way, everyone can accept it."

From then on, Tian Nanqi accompanied Lin Shuping to many hospitals that performed sex reassignment surgery.

At the end of 2002, Lin Shuping underwent sex reassignment surgery at a hospital in Beijing. The surgery was very successful. After

the surgery Lin Shuping dared not return home. He couldn't let Xiaolan know the truth.

Mid-June 2003... Tian Nanqi and Lin Shuping went to process their divorce. This was the most painful

moment for her. Seeing her husband transformed into a woman—how could she not be in pain? She had originally thought that with her husband transformed into a woman, the marriage

would automatically dissolve. Now she understood. They had to go through the divorce proceedings. In front of everyone, the two women went through

the divorce proceedings. She was extremely upset.

Three days after Lin Shuping fled after the divorce, Tian Nanqi received a letter from him: "

...I owe you a debt that can never be repaid. The harm I caused you can never be compensated for.

I know I am a sinner. A sinner to you, a sinner to our daughter, a sinner to our parents. You can tell

Xiaolan that her father is dead. However, I beg you for one thing: from now on, let me visit her as her aunt. Is that

alright?

Even once a year is fine. Please." I love Xiaolan very much…

Tian Nanqi is preparing to take her daughter to work in Shanghai. She wrote back to Lin Shuping, telling her: Your daughter is yours

too . You have the right to visit her. However, to avoid hurting her, you cannot let her know the truth. Of course,

when she becomes an adult, you should still tell her the truth.

--The End--

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The husband of the transgender girl Mei'er

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