The Carnal Prayer Mat (Ancient Forbidden Book)

The story takes place during the Zhihe era of the Yuan Dynasty. There was a mountain called Kuocang Mountain, and a monk named Zhengyi, whose Dharma name was Gufeng, lived there. He was a student at the Chuzhou Prefectural School (a student admitted to schools at the prefectural, state, and county levels during the Ming and Qing Dynasties through examinations).
When he was born, while other babies cried, he immediately began reciting texts.
His parents, seeing this, exclaimed, "Ah, we must have accumulated good karma in our past lives! This son is destined for greatness!" They quickly found a teacher, saying, "Teacher, please listen to what the Four Books and Five Classics my son is reciting!"
The teacher listened for a long time, then blushed, unable to understand.
Just then, a beggar monk came to their house. He listened intently and exclaimed, "Good heavens!" The little fellow was reciting the *Surangama Sutra*. He told Zhengyi's parents, "This child is the reincarnation of a high monk; please allow me to take him as my disciple."
His parents, upon hearing this, thought, "Good heavens! We just have a son, and you want him to become a monk? You're making our family line die out!" They kicked the monk out.
Later, when the child grew up, he was incredibly intelligent! He could
read anything—from *Jin Ping Mei* and *The Story of the Foolish Woman* to *Ghost Blows Out the Light*—with photographic memory! He could read ten lines at a glance.
Imagine how happy his father must have been! Overjoyed? That's an understatement.
His father was so happy he wanted to bang his head against the wall!
This unfortunate child didn't bother with the imperial examinations; all he wanted
was to become a monk… Within a few years, he had his parents overjoyed.
Finally, peace and quiet!
The spendthrift had given away all the family's money—time to go! He was going to become a monk!
Because he always carried a cloth bag he made himself, everyone called him the Cloth Bag Monk.
One day, the Cloth Bag Monk was meditating in the temple when a young man entered with two pageboys.
The Cloth Bag Monk immediately recognized him. This guy was no ordinary person. He was handsome and dignified;
in the original text, his appearance was described as having the serene beauty of autumn water and the graceful grace of spring clouds.
How handsome is that? If he were alive today, he'd be at least as good as Edison Chen, if not Nicholas Tse!
This young man's eyes were...blazing with fire!
What kind of eyes are those? They're eyes specifically designed to seduce women. Commonly known as: electric eyes!
The monk rose and bowed,
and the two sat down to chat.
"I am Wei Yangsheng, and I have come to meet you, Master, having heard you are a highly respected monk."
The two chatted about Buddhism for a while.
This Wei Yangsheng was quite clever; he knew all sorts of things—Jin Ping Mei, Aoi Sora, Maria Ozawa, threesomes, ejaculation, squirting, 1000-person kills, 28 consecutive online posts...
The monk saw that this young man was comparable to himself. If he didn't take him as a disciple, he didn't know how many innocent girls he would harm. No way!
So he had Wei Yangsheng stay for lunch.
The monk said to Wei Yangsheng,
"I see you are so clever, brother. Listen to my advice: what is the point of this life? Eating, drinking, and defecating. Why not come here with me, let's cultivate together, and become immortals sooner, going to the Pure Land together!"
Wei Yangsheng said: It's not that I don't want to cultivate with you, Master, I've actually wanted to become a monk for a long time! "Being an immortal is wonderful! Isn't it? "
Wei Yangsheng said. "But I'm still too young. I have two wishes to fulfill. Once I do, I'll definitely come to you, Master, to cultivate." The monk asked, "What wishes?"
Wei Yangsheng replied, "I'm not ugly, and to be honest, I'm quite intelligent. I have a small ambition: to become a great scholar. My second wish is to be the only son in my family. I'm still a virgin. Once I marry the most beautiful woman in the world and have a son, I'll become a monk."
The monk thought to himself, "Damn it! The most beautiful woman in the world doesn't have her name written on her face! What if she doesn't acknowledge it later? Then it'll all be for nothing!"
The monk was furious. "
Do you want to go to heaven or hell?" "If you want to go to hell, go find your most beautiful woman. If you want to go to heaven, then become
a monk with me!" Upon hearing this, Wei Yangsheng was speechless.
He got angry and said to the monk, "Well then, when I've had my fun, I'll come to you, Master, to cultivate. I have other things to do, you go ahead..."
With that, he turned and left.
The monk said from behind, "Go, Wukong. One day, you will understand your master's good intentions and naturally come back to sing this song with me..."
Wei Yangsheng descended the mountain, thinking, "This monk! I'm only in my early twenties, a virgin, and he wants me to be a monk? Pah!
He even dares to curse my wife to cheat on me! What era do you think we live in?! There's no QQ, no cell phone...
I'll be stricter with my wife and see how she gets cheated on!
Besides, I'm so handsome, I look like Nicholas Tse! Does my wife like ugly guys?!"
Back home, he immediately took action, hiring several matchmakers to find him a wife.
Wei Yangsheng came from a moderately wealthy family, and being handsome and well-versed in *Jin Ping Mei*, he attracted many young ladies willing to marry him.
These past few days, he'd been going on so many blind dates... he'd gotten tired of them all... and none of them were to his liking.
The original poster said, "What you see is not what you imagine." I agree! Matchmaker Li from Li Family Village understood.
One day, Matchmaker Li came to Wei Yangsheng's door and said, "
The daughter of the Iron-Door Taoist from Twenty Mile Village, oh my, she's so beautiful… Have you seen Barbie Hsu? Have you seen Lin Chih-ling? They're all nothing compared to her! There's just one thing: they don't allow their daughter to go on blind dates. It's either a marriage that works out or not."
Wei Yangsheng asked, "Why is her father called the Iron-Door Taoist? Is her house gate made of iron?
Her father… has no descendants! He only has this one daughter. He's so old-fashioned. Other people's daughters are allowed to meet, but his daughter, at sixteen, hasn't even been to the market or burned incense. He's very strict. People come to visit him, knocking until the door is broken, but he won't open it. So they gave him that nickname, the Iron-Door Taoist…"
Wei Yangsheng thought, "Well, that's fine. With a wife like that, plus such a strict father-in-law, surely there won't be any trouble in the harem."
But Wei Yangsheng still wasn't sure. Why? Since ancient times, there have been two kinds of people who are the matchmakers!
The matchmaker tells you today that this girl is Diao Chan's sister, but if you marry her tomorrow, you're in trouble... she's Sister Pomegranate! Isn't that tragic?
True to his reputation as a lecherous man, Wei Yangsheng has a more scientific method: summoning the immortals!
The next day, he summoned his immortal cousin—the charlatan Wei
Yangsheng: "Isn't Yu Xiang, the daughter of the Iron Door Taoist, beautiful?
" Immortal: *Auto-reply* Wei
Yangsheng: "Is the Iron Door Taoist strict with his daughter?
" Immortal: *Auto-reply* Wei
Yangsheng: "Do we have a destiny?
" Immortal: *Auto-reply* Wei
Yangsheng: "Will my wife cheat on me in the future?"
Immortal: *Auto-reply* Wei
Yangsheng thought, "No problem, with such a handsome husband and such a strict father-in-law, nothing will go wrong." Immortals... sometimes they get distracted too.
...
Wei Yangsheng thought, "Alright!"
He immediately summoned the matchmaker and told her to go to the Iron Door Taoist's house to propose marriage. When the matchmaker arrived at the home of the Taoist priest Tiefei, the priest observed that Wei Yangsheng's family was fairly well-off, and the man himself was handsome and well-educated. He agreed to the marriage.
Without further ado, people in ancient times were decisive! Not long after, the bride was brought into the family.
Although Wei Yangsheng consulted deities and listened to matchmakers, he still hadn't seen what his wife looked like and was completely uncertain... like buying a cat through a sack...
But on their wedding night, when the veil was lifted, Wei Yangsheng was utterly captivated!
He wouldn't dare say she was the most beautiful woman in the world, but she was certainly second to none.
Her face was top-notch! Her skin was snow-white, and her figure was stunning—full breasts, no doubt about it! A pert bottom, no doubt about it! What's a slender waist? This is a slender waist!
Although Yu Xiang was a great beauty, there was one thing that didn't suit Wei Yangsheng's taste.
What was it? Their sex life!
You can imagine, given her father's upbringing, she wasn't taught filial piety or how to be a virtuous woman. She hadn't read any erotic literature and viewed marital relations as a taboo subject. She was incredibly shy.
Wei Yangsheng gave her a nickname: "Female Taoist Priest.
" If you said "little penis" in front of her, you'd blush crimson.
"Ugh!" she ran away...
Wei Yangsheng had a peculiar habit: he preferred to have sex during the day, getting excited by seeing women's naked bodies. But Yu Xiang was different. If you forced her, she would scream the moment you touched her, and it was the same if you forced her...
Wei Yangsheng was so frustrated
. Fine, I won't force her during the day, but can't you let me have my way at night? We weren't even allowed to have sex in the dark, with candles.
And the positions? Forget about it, it was the standard missionary position. If you asked her to do the "Lohan pushing the cart," she said it was disrespectful to her husband. If you asked her to do the "Guanyin sitting on a lotus," she said it was oppressing her husband.
During sex, she was like a dead fish... One minute, no scream; an hour; still no scream.
Completely indifferent!
Wei Yangsheng thought, this can't go on .
There was no way around it; in ancient times, there were no computers or DVDs. The ancients were incredibly clever; they had something we don't—erotic pictures
. Ancient erotic pictures were usually in color.
The one Wei Yangsheng bought was a high-end one, a series, 36 pictures.
He took it back to his wife, Yuxiang, to see. Yuxiang didn't know what it was. When she opened it, she saw a naked man embracing a girl on a rockery, having sex. Yuxiang had never seen anything like it before.
"I thought it was some kind of classic text! What are you doing with this obscene stuff? Take it out and burn it!"
Wei Yangsheng grabbed her.
"No, no, no. My friend bought it with money, over 100 taels of silver! If you're willing to pay for it, then burn it."
He then began to give Yuxiang a sex education lesson, from the importance of marital relations to the ten cardinal virtues and eight principles of procreation.
"If the ancients considered these matters between men and women to be obscene and filthy, why would they paint them and have people buy them? Right!"
Yu Xiang said
. "According to you, it's all perfectly legitimate. Then why don't men and women do it in broad daylight in front of others, instead of doing it like thieves at night, keeping it a secret? Clearly, it's not a respectable thing."
Wei Yangsheng laughed, "You can't blame my wife for that. It's all my father-in-law's fault! He keeps you locked up at home all day. If no one did this during the day, how would the painter know? And he painted it so vividly, it makes my heart itch just looking at it."
Yu Xiang said, "Since people do this during the day, I've been in my family for sixteen years, how come I've never seen my parents having sex in broad daylight?"
Wei Yangsheng laughed, "Hahaha... Wife, if you saw your parents doing this, wouldn't it a huge loss if it aroused your desire and made you lovesick? That's why we kept it from you." "
Aren't the two of them ashamed to do this during the day? They're so shy."
Wei Yangsheng saw an opportunity! He said to Yu Xiang,
"During the day, my wife is so beautiful, with such fair skin. Seeing how attractive I am, we'll enjoy ourselves more. It's ten times happier than doing it at night!"
Yu Xiang wasn't a blockhead; though she said she was unwilling, she secretly agreed.
She turned to look at the erotic book, the illustrations quite lifelike.
Wei Yangsheng saw it and knew he was getting into it, ready to make his move, but then thought, "I can't satisfy you completely; I'll take it slow."
With that, he pulled over a high-backed chair, sat down, and pulled Yu Xiang into his arms. Looking at the erotic book together—
the ancients were truly clever; they even included explanations with the illustrations, one above the other.
Yu Xiang was incredibly aroused.
"I'm not looking anymore! What obscene stuff! Let's sleep!"
A woman's "sleep" is definitely a verb!
Wei Yangsheng pulled her close and kissed her first.
Poor Wei Yangsheng, they'd been married for over a month and hadn't even had a proper French kiss yet.
"Baby, let's not go to bed today. Let's use this armchair as a makeshift rockery."
Yu Xiang said reluctantly, but in her heart she had already agreed.
Wei Yangsheng carried her to the armchair, reached under her skirt and touched her; it was completely wet.
It seems the erotic book
has quite a powerful effect. Yu Xiang let Wei Yangsheng strip her naked, put her legs on either side of the armchair, and raised the jade whisk (original text: don't grab me, grab Li Yu, the author of this!) to grope her genitals.
Yu Xiang couldn't take it anymore, spread her legs with her hands, and went to meet him. She immediately felt a soreness and numbness. She moaned softly.
Wei Yangsheng knew she was about to lose control and said to Yu Xiang, "Let's go to bed, it's not comfortable here."
Yu Xiang was in the throes of passion, afraid that if she went to bed Wei Yangsheng's manhood would come out. Besides, it was the first time her husband had been so good, her whole body felt so good, her hands and feet were sore and weak that she couldn't move. She
closed her eyes and shook her head at Wei Yangsheng.
Wei Yangsheng said, "Sweetheart, are you feeling weak? Let me carry you to bed."
With that, he carried Yuxiang to the bed, killing two birds with one stone, allowing them to continue their lovemaking while still kissing.
Once on the bed, Wei Yangsheng laid Yuxiang down, placing her legs on his shoulders. Let's start again! His wife had finally opened up to him; how could he not put in some effort!
After a while, Yuxiang suddenly cried out, "I can't take it anymore, I'm going to die..." Her moans sounded like someone on the verge of death.
After holding her for a while, Yuxiang woke up and asked Wei Yangsheng, "
Did I just die?
" "Hahaha..." Wei Yangsheng laughed, "That's not death, that's called an orgasm. Both men and women have orgasms. When a woman orgasms, her bones feel numb, and she feels dazed—that's an orgasm."
Yuxiang, who had never experienced an orgasm before, said to Wei Yangsheng,
"It feels so good! I want an orgasm every day...every single day!" "
Oh my god," Wei Yangsheng thought, "I'm doomed...the tiger has been released!"
From then on, the couple sought pleasure by referring to erotic picture books. Wei Yangsheng also bought "Jin Ping Mei" and "African Man vs. Maria," and the couple became increasingly enthusiastic.
After half a year, Wei Yangsheng became unhappy. Why? Because he had an annoying father-in-law...
Wei Yangsheng's parents were deceased, and he had married into the Tie Fei Dao family.
Tie Fei Dao had a problem: he loved to nag, yes, like an old woman.
He complained that Wei Yangsheng was useless, thinking that this boy, fair-skinned and handsome, so smart, was always cooped up in his wife's room. He cursed himself for being blind.
He didn't treat Wei Yangsheng like a son-in-law at all, but like his own son.
The key is that while you think this way, he doesn't think that way. He's just a father-in-law, what's with all the arrogance!
Every time he saw her, he would nag her, so eventually Wei Yangsheng stopped coming out altogether, out of sight, out of mind.
But this couldn't go on forever. The father and son were always holding back, and Wei Yangsheng, young and impetuous, thought he might as well go on a trip for a few months, and maybe even steal some women. He could play with all the women in the world… Hehe… Good! That's what he'd do!
But what about his wife, this tiger unleashed
from its cage? She still needed her father-in-law to keep an eye on her. One day, Wei Yangsheng went to the front hall to get some tea, and his father-in-law happened to be there.
"Hey, hey, you there… Wei Yangsheng, come here!"
Wei Yangsheng obediently came to Tie Fei Daoren and stood respectfully.
"What are your orders, father-in-law?"
"My dear son-in-law, you're such a grown man now. Look at Yao Jiaxin from the Yao family at the east end of the village, he's already been admitted to the music academy. Look at you, you're only twenty…"
"Damn you, father-in-law! (I added the first two words for him) Thanks to your guidance, I've finally realized my mistake! I've decided to go out and find a renowned teacher. I want to serve the court and pass the imperial examinations! I'll leave tomorrow and return by next spring. I'm just worried that Yuxiang, being newly married, might be reluctant to leave. Please tell her it's your idea and tell her."
The Taoist priest, relieved that his nagging hadn't been in vain, immediately advised Yuxiang that a true man should prioritize the nation and its people.
Yuxiang had just tasted the sweetness of success and had no choice. So be it!
The next day, Weiyang Sheng bid farewell to his father-in-law and wife. His extraordinary journey began...
Wei Yangsheng claimed he was going on a study tour to find a teacher. What a joke! Finding women was the real goal.
So he'd spend a couple of days in each place, looking for pretty young girls and young women.
Money wasn't a concern; his family was well-off, and his father-in-law, upon hearing it was for studies, immediately gave him one hundred taels of silver. Go on...
One day, while traveling, two of his attendants fell ill.
In ancient times, without luxury cars, status was generally measured by the number of attendants. Just like driving a luxury car today.
Wei Yangsheng had no choice but to rest at an inn. That day, while daydreaming at the door, a fellow guest came out of the next room.
"Young master, you seem quite bored? Let's go have a drink, brother."
Just then, Wei Yangsheng, feeling rather idle, decided to go downstairs for a drink with him.
After exchanging names, the man said, "I'm afraid you'll laugh at me, but I'm a master thief, nicknamed 'Sai Kunlun.'"
Wei Yangsheng's interest was piqued. He thought, "If he's with me, I'll know which young ladies are pretty! Which pretty lady is foolishly waiting to be seduced on the street?" He
then said to Sai Kunlun, "From the moment I was born, I wanted to be a thief—no, a chivalrous knight. Let's become sworn brothers!"
Wei Yangsheng then called the waiter to prepare a table of wine and food. The two knelt and swore an oath of brotherhood.
Sai Kunlun, being older, was called "elder brother," and Wei Yangsheng, younger, was called "younger brother."
They drank until midnight and then went to bed.
Wei Yangsheng said to Sai Kunlun, "Since we've become sworn brothers, elder brother, let's not be so formal. Let's sleep together tonight." "Let's chat,"
Sai Kunlun agreed.
Once in bed, Wei Yangsheng's true colors were revealed
. "Brother, to tell you the truth, I claimed to be away studying, but in reality, I'm here to seek out beautiful women. Although I'm married, my lifelong wish is to have my way with all the beauties in the world, so my life's pleasures won't be in vain. But I've traveled to so many places, and I haven't met a single top-tier girl!"
Sai Kunlun laughed, "Brother, naturally, most beauties come from wealthy families, and fewer from poor ones. And what wealthy person spends all day wandering the streets chasing men? I often visit people's homes at night. I've seen women like Lin Chih-ling. I've even seen Xiao Yueyue. Even more outrageous, last time I actually went to Sister Feng's house. The thing is, I didn't know! I was hiding under the bed, and I was spied on while Sister Feng was bathing. It almost blinded me!"
Wei Yangsheng said, "Brother, you're often spied on while bathing at night, and you can tolerate that?"
"Hey, I used to be so inexperienced, I couldn't handle it, so I'd masturbate. But after seeing so many, it's nothing special anymore. Now I just masturbate to things like the White Tiger and the Azure Dragon."
Wei Yangsheng listened with great interest.
"Then tell me about it, brother!"
"Okay, I'll tell you two stories. These old women, nine and a half out of ten like doing this, but there are two types: the pretentious type and the non-pretentious type. The non-pretentious type is easy; they'll do it and then sleep soundly until dawn. The most annoying are the pretentious type. They want to do it, but they say they won't. Last time I sneaked into one, and the old man was holding her, wanting to do it, but this woman absolutely refused. Okay, fine, if she won't do it, she'll sleep. The old man fell asleep, but what she really wanted to do, she'd do it all at night..." "Ugh, not sleeping. She secretly stripped the old man naked, then stripped herself completely naked too. She sat on top of him, rubbing her genitals against his crotch until he woke up, then started doing it. But one time wasn't enough; she wouldn't let him sleep. She kept going! What a rip-off! I spent the whole night crawling on and off the bed, and got nothing. Hey, bro, what are you doing? Holy crap, I'm masturbating against the wall!" Wei Yangsheng and Sai Kunlun had been researching all night, making Wei Yangsheng incredibly itchy, in a deserted village inn. There weren't any young ladies around. Helpless, Wei Yangsheng secretly masturbated several times.
A few days later, his two attendants recovered, and Wei Yangsheng insisted on traveling with Sai Kunlun, but Sai Kunlun, used to traveling alone, refused.
However, he promised Wei Yangsheng to immediately inform him if he saw any beautiful young women.
Wei Yangsheng bid farewell to Sai Kunlun and continued his journey. One day, he passed a temple dedicated to the Goddess of Fertility, where incense was burning brightly, and locals said it was extremely efficacious. Wei Yangsheng suddenly realized, "I've been so busy walking around the streets that I forgot about this." Other... The temple was filled with all sorts of people burning incense: old women, young wives, and old men. This temple dedicated to the Goddess of Fertility was mostly frequented by young women, including many wives from wealthy families; men rarely came.
Having made up his mind, he went into the temple to see the abbot and said he wanted to rent a room there to perform a ritual for his deceased parents.
The abbot thought to himself, "Perform a ritual for my parents? Who comes to the Temple of the Goddess of Fertility to perform rituals for their parents? Do you think they'll be reborn as someone else's son calling you 'uncle'?" Upon reflection, he knew this young man had no good intentions.
"Five taels (around 5000 yuan) a room."
If I don't rip you off, I'm not a monk. A house in the city only costs one tael a month.
Wei Yangsheng thought, "You're really ruthless!"
He steeled himself, "Five taels it is. Worth it for a woman." "
This guy really goes all out!" the abbot thought. "I'll make some extra money from prostitution this time!
You go after your girls, I'll go to my prostitutes! I can't be bothered with you."
Wei Yangsheng settled down at the Temple of the Goddess of Fertility and even made a small diary.
Whenever a young woman came to the temple to pray for a child, Wei Yangsheng would secretly hide behind the door to watch. If he saw a handsome one, he would quickly peek out. The young woman would look and exclaim
, "Ah… Nicholas Tse! Handsome!"
Wei Yangsheng would then... As the young woman prayed for a child before the Bodhisattva, he eavesdropped nearby.
The monk, when praying for a child for the woman, would ask her name, age, place of origin, and whose wife she was.
Why ask? To see if she was rich or poor, easy to fleece.
If she was rich, she was easy to fleece. "Next year, the Purple Star will descend to earth and be reborn into your family. Isn't Tang Bohu handsome? Next year, he'll be reborn into your family! As your son, that's settled!
" If she was poor, he wouldn't pluck her hair. He would then chant sutras for her: "Sister Furong, Little Yueyue, Sister Feng… all of them will be reborn into your family…"
Wei Yangsheng listened from afar and then wrote it all down. He wrote it down in his little notebook, ranking them from most beautiful to ugliest as 3 stars, 2 stars, and 1 star.
Half a month had passed, and while there were plenty of two-star and one-star women, not a single three-star one.
Wei Yangsheng thought to himself, "Nothing is difficult in this world unless one has lustful desires. I'll wait!"
That morning—no, it was almost noon—Wei Yangsheng was still sleeping. "Husband, get
up quickly!" a pageboy shouted, running into the room.
Wei Yangsheng usually had his two pages keep watch while he slept in.
"Look at the beauties! Beauties, beauties!" the pageboy cried
. Wei Yangsheng quickly got up and dressed. He spent some time getting ready, which delayed him a bit. When he went outside, the women had already finished burning incense and were about to leave.
Wei Yangsheng hurriedly ran out, and as he passed the three women, he glanced at them—good heavens! They were truly celestial beings, beautiful as immortals. They were definitely not on the same level as any of the women he had seen before.
What to do? What to do? He was at a loss. He decided to take the plunge!
He ran to the temple gate, knelt down, and began to kowtow.
The two pageboys and the abbot were terrified; this guy had gone mad with womanizing!
The three young women were also confused and only left after he finished kowtowing.
The two younger ones didn't pay much attention, but the middle-aged woman, upon seeing him, thought, "This young man is quite something!" She gave him a flirtatious look, covered her mouth, and walked away laughing.
This completely captivated Wei Yangsheng—three women! After waiting for so long, three suddenly appeared. Was heaven taking pity on me and preparing to send me a 4P package? He
hurriedly asked the abbot whose wives these were. The abbot, seeing that he would be ruined by this guy sooner or later—a womanizing madman!—refused to tell him anything and told him to get lost, refusing to let him stay in the temple.
Wei Yangsheng moved out and into the marketplace. He wrote down all three women in his little notebook, three three-star entries, but unfortunately, he didn't know their names or addresses.
Since he had nothing to do, he wandered the streets all day, hoping to bump into them someday.
One day, while wandering the streets, he saw... haha, big brother, Sai Kunlun! He hurriedly called out to him, "Brother, you promised to find me a beautiful woman, have you forgotten?"
Sai Kunlun thought to himself, "Kid, you're in such a hurry. We just met and you're already so impatient."
"Don't worry, sworn brothers, would I forget about this? I've already found some for you. I was just about to tell you. Let's go find a hotel, we can drink and chat.
Want to know who's had the worst luck in eight lifetimes? Stay tuned for the next installment.
" Sai Kunlun sat down and said to Wei Yangsheng, "I've found three for you, but you can only choose one. I've never tried a foursome before, you can't be the first to try it."
Wei Yangsheng hurriedly said, "One is enough, why do I need so many... Brother, tell me."
"So, do you like wild women or not?"
"Of course I like wild women, like a dead fish pretending to be innocent."
"Oh, then you might be disappointed. All three women are already married, I guess you won't like them, forget it."
Wei Yangsheng hurriedly said, "Brother, no! Your sister-in-law was a chaste and virtuous woman back then, married for half a year, and now I've trained her to be as fierce as a wolf." Sai
Kunlun said, "Brother, do you prefer to be slowly boiled like a frog, or do you prefer dry wood and a raging fire?"
"My dear brother, my lust is raging! If I don't sleep with a woman for three days, I have to masturbate, otherwise it'll just flow down my pants, the faster the better!"
Sai Kunlun laughed. "Alright, the young woman I introduced to you today is the wife of Quan Laoshi from the back street. I passed by there a couple of days ago, and I saw this young woman through the door—she was incredibly beautiful, her skin as smooth as pearls. Just then, a dark-skinned, burly man came out. I looked at him, and damn! I thought it was Wu Dalang's father! He was carrying a bundle of silk to sell on the front street." "I thought it was too far to see clearly, so I pretended to be a silk buyer and went into her house. I asked her to bring out a few bundles of silk to look at. Her small hands were like newly sprouted lotus roots. I noticed the young woman was wearing a thin gauze shirt, so I deliberately knocked a bundle of silk to the ground and made her pick it up. As she bent over, oh my, her breasts were half-exposed! My soul was almost stolen away. These past two days, you and I will pretend to be silk buyers, and when her husband goes out to sell silk, we'll definitely be able to seduce him using my method!"
After saying this, Wei Yangsheng scratched his head anxiously and asked:
"Brother, tell me about the other two top-tier beauties too, I want to see which one is easier to approach."
"Those two, one is in her twenties, the other is sixteen or seventeen, they're sisters-in-law. Both women rarely go out, their husbands' families have been officials for generations, their family education is extremely strict, it would take months to make a move. Unlike this honest wife of Quan, whose husband is rarely home, she's easier to approach."
Having made up his mind, Sai Kunlun said to Wei Yangsheng, "When it comes to picking up girls, the most important thing is your capital, brother, how was the performance in bed?"
Wei Yangsheng thought this was perfect timing, it was a good opportunity to talk about his strengths.
"Brother, so-so, I lasted an hour without ejaculating!"
Wei Yangsheng's longest was only half an hour, but now he had to show off, so he said it lasted longer, since you wouldn't be watching a live broadcast anyway.
"Besides, I had someone buy me a few bottles of Indian God Oil a few days ago. One application and I'll probably last two hours!"
Sai Kunlun laughed. "Aphrodisiacs are just an aid. The real strength comes from your manhood. If your manhood is small, even if you soak in Indian God Oil all day, it's useless. Come on, let your brother see if your manhood is up to par."
Wei Yangsheng saw that he was serious and took off his pants for Sai Kunlun to see.
"Where? Brother, I can't see it?"
Wei Yangsheng quickly pulled it out and shook it a couple of times.
"Here, brother."
"Damn! Slow down! You almost peed in my face!"
Sai Kunlun couldn't help but exclaim,
"If you were to compare hair length with someone else, I believe you could hold your own, haha. But as for this penis, let me tell you, it's like a scallion growing in a field of leeks."
Wei Yangsheng was immediately hit with an unprecedented blow.
"This is only soft. If it were hard, brother, I'd see. My wife always praises my penis for being big and thick! This is too hurtful, you can't play like this!"
"I'm not trying to discourage you, brother, but your penis isn't even a third the size of Quan Laoshi's. How are you going to seduce someone's wife? I heard from his neighbors that in the summer, Quan Laoshi wears baggy pants on the street, and his penis is dangling in his crotch. People call him 'Three Legs'! One day, he was competing in push-ups with someone, and when he got really into it, his penis was still there, with both feet not even touching the ground. Tell me, brother, how are you going to seduce someone's wife?"
Wei Yangsheng's burning passion was instantly extinguished. His self-esteem was shattered like never before. Sai Kunlun offered a few words of comfort,
then said to Wei Yangsheng, "Brother, don't worry, I'll find you a woman with a tight penis." With that, he took his leave.
After Sai Kunlun left, Wei Yangsheng grew angrier and angrier. "
He said mine was small, so why did he make his wife so comfortable? And when he went to a prostitute, he made her moan and groan? Could Sai Kunlun have lied to me?" From then on
, Wei Yangsheng would frequently visit the men's restroom, watching others urinate. And so, another perverted figure was born. After long-term observation, Wei Yangsheng realized Sai Kunlun hadn't lied; his penis really was like a scallion growing in a leek patch. Others' were like a tree growing in a leek patch. It was too humiliating! Wei Yangsheng would often examine the scallion, thinking, "Heavens, this is so unfair! I was given such a handsome appearance, but such a pathetic penis!" They almost wished they could just cut it all off and rush off to become immortals like the Cloth Bag Monk.

One day, Wei Yangsheng went out for a stroll and wandered to a back street. He saw a young woman emerge from a doorway. The woman was stunningly beautiful, with skin like pearls and her breasts partially exposed. There was a hint of flirtatiousness in her eyes .
Wei Yangsheng thought this must be the wife of Quan Laoshi that Sai Kunlun had mentioned.
However, he felt ashamed of his own small size and turned away.
As he walked, he saw a poster on the roadside.
Wei Yangsheng went closer and read two lines of large characters: "
Studied in America, just returned.
Specializing in treating micropenis, the latest American patented technology—human transplantation!
Act fast, American expert on duty, leaving in the next couple of days!
Address: Room 1D78, Chaoda Jiba Temple."
Wei Yangsheng was overjoyed! "Thank God! Thank the Party! Has heaven come to save me?"
He hurriedly followed the address and went straight to Chaoda Jiba Temple
. Upon entering the room, he saw an old man with white hair and a youthful face.
Seeing him enter, the old man gestured for him to sit down and asked,
"Brother, have you come seeking medical help?"
"Gods, save me!" Wei Yangsheng knelt down with a thud.
"To tell you the truth, although I am handsome, I have a useless manhood. Please
, Gods, save me!" He then kowtowed.
The old man helped him up.
"You've come to the right person. Even if you don't have a penis, I can make it bigger and thicker! No medicine, no injections! Get up, let me see your assets."
Wei Yangsheng stood up and took off his pants. The old man burst into laughter upon seeing them.
"You're still laughing! I've been beating it every day for the past few days, it's been swollen for days!"
the old man said to Wei Yangsheng.
"If it were just a normal increase in size and girth, I'd give you two doses of medicine, you can go back and wash it, it'll increase in girth by a third, but your foundation is too thin, only my specialty—human transplantation!"
Wei Yangsheng asked,
"How does it work?"
"You find two horses, one male and one female, let them mate, and while they're mating, cut off the male horse's penis, then kill the female horse, pull out the male horse's penis, then cut off your penis, and attach the male horse's."
After saying that, he turned his head and said,
"Hey, brother, why are you lying down naked?"
"God, hurry up and cut it off!" Wei Yangsheng said, swinging his penis.
"Hey, brother, don't rush. Let me tell you first. There are three major side effects to human transplantation. First, you can't have sex for three months after the surgery. Second, only married women over twenty can have sex with you after the surgery. Virgins under twenty will die if you have sex with them! Third, you won't have a penis after the surgery, so you won't be able to have children. Even if you do, they will die young. You need to be mentally prepared, brother."
Wei Yangsheng said,
"It's okay! I'm away from home right now, my wife isn't here, so I can go three months without sex. Secondly, I've already been married, so even if I take a concubine, a young woman, or remarry, I won't care. Thirdly, life is short, enjoy it while you can. For the sake of sexual happiness, not having a son is fine. Enough talk, let's begin!"
the old man laughed,
"Brother, don't rush. Even if you're willing to have it done now, you don't have a horse, do you? Bring your horse over in three days, and I'll do it all for you!"
"Alright, then my happiness for the rest of my life depends entirely on the gods' help!" Wei
Yangsheng returned home, thinking to himself, "I'll be changing my 'horse-riding' in three days, so I'll enjoy my penis for the last few days." That night, he called his pageboy, Shujian, to play in his rear.
Wei Yangsheng brought two pageboys, one named Shujian, and the other named Jianqiao.
Wei Yangsheng liked Shujian; when they did rear-entry, Shujian could even imitate a young woman's moans.
After they finished, Shujian asked Wei Yangsheng,
"It's been a long time since you've done that in your rear, young master. Why are you in such high spirits today?"
Wei Yangsheng then told Shujian about changing his 'horse-riding'.
Shujian said,
"Then when your penis is as thick as a horse's, you won't come looking for me anymore. I only ask that when you find beautiful women, you can't finish playing with them all, so I can have a sip."
"No problem, what's mine is yours!" Wei Yangsheng agreed to Shujian's request.
The next day, Wei Yangsheng took out silver to go to the horse market to buy a horse.
Look at this one, look at that one. Finally, they found a fine horse. Its penis was as long and thick as an arm.
"Hey brother, are you buying the horse, or the horse's penis? Can you please stop touching this horse's little pecker?" the horse seller said.
"I'll buy both!"
They led the two horses back to their lodgings, taking good care of them, adding Indian herbal oil to their feed whenever possible. They hoped the stallion's penis would grow even thicker and bigger.
Three days later, Wei Yangsheng had Shujian lead the two horses they had bought—one male and one female—to the old man's residence.
Upon their arrival, the old man made Wei Yangsheng strip naked, shaving off all his clothes, including his prized mane.
After shaving, he made Wei Yangsheng lie on the bed, binding him tightly, and then applied anesthetic to his genitals.
Wei Yangsheng immediately felt a cool, numb sensation, and his penis went numb.
The old man sent Shujian out to buy fine wine and meat, and they sat there drinking and waiting for the two horses to mate.
They waited from morning until noon, but the two horses showed no interest.
Wei Yangsheng grew impatient and said to the old man,
"Immortal, I have some Indian herbal oil here. We don't need it anymore, so take some and feed it to the horses; it might have some effect."
The old man took the herbal oil and poured it into the horse feed. Immediately, the two horses began to mate passionately!
"Quickly, come with me!" The old man rushed forward with a large knife, and Shujian quickly followed with a basin.
"Thud!" With one stroke, the stallion's penis was severed and left inside the mare's vulva. Then, with another stroke, the mare was brought down.
Poor thing, killed in the middle of mating—how painful!
The old man pulled the whip from the mare's vulva and ran to Wei Yangsheng's bedside
. "Immortal, wait...
" Wei Yangsheng hadn't finished speaking when, "Ah..." he cried out and fainted.
What he really wanted to say was, "Fuck your mother, the anesthesia has worn off, give me some more."
When Wei Yangsheng woke up, his lower body was already tightly wrapped up.
For the past three months, he had been well-behaved, not only not wanting to have sex, but also reluctant to touch himself.
Until three months passed, when the old man untied his towel and washed himself clean, Wei Yangsheng took a closer look and couldn't help but beam with joy.
"Big, thick! With this treasure, I can conquer the world!"
A few days later, he ran into Sai Kunlun on the street, and Wei Yangsheng wanted to show off.
He quickly grabbed him and called him to a hotel, where the two drank together.
"Seeing how happy you are, my good brother, is there some good news?"
Wei Yangsheng was delighted when he heard him ask. He turned around, secretly took off his pants, held his penis in both hands, and turned back to see Sai Kunlun's reaction.
"Brother, we've had enough food, why are you taking a donkey penis?"
"Haha, to be honest, brother, let me see what this is."
Sai Kunlun then leaned forward to examine it closely. Seeing the scar, he believed it was real.
Wei Yangsheng then told Sai Kunlun about the penis transplant, and Sai Kunlun exclaimed,
"American human transplants, truly living up to their reputation. It's a pity the immortal has already left; otherwise, I would have one transplanted too, and we brothers would be unparalleled!"
This filled Sai Kunlun with envy, jealousy, and hatred! Emptiness, loneliness, and coldness!
"Since you're going to such lengths, brother, I'll take care of Quan Laoshi's wife for you!"
Wei Yangsheng had endured so much suffering for this day, and the two immediately agreed to take advantage of Quan Laoshi's trip to sell silk, which would take more than ten days to complete. It would be the perfect opportunity to strike.
The two agreed to go to Quan Laoshi's house early the next morning to seduce his wife. Wei Yangsheng dressed up early and, after Sai Kunlun arrived, the two went to Quan Laoshi's house together.
"Is Quan Laoshi home?" Sai Kunlun asked as they entered. Turning around, he saw Wei Yangsheng, already with his pants down, swaying his penis as he entered. Just as he was about to curse him, Quan Laoshi's wife came out from the inner room. Sai Kunlun thought, "My reputation is going to be ruined by this kid!" He knew that
if the woman saw Wei Yangsheng acting like a scoundrel, she might at least give him a good scolding, disturbing the neighbors. Or worse, she might report them to the authorities, accusing them of trying to rape a woman in broad daylight.
But surprisingly, the woman wasn't angry at all. She said to them,
"It's so early in the morning, I'm not buying sausages. You two go look around somewhere else."
It turned out that Quan Laoshi's wife was nearsighted, if not 800 degrees, then at least 1000 degrees. She assumed Wei Yangsheng and his wife were there to sell sausages early in the morning. =
Wei Yangsheng originally intended to show off his manhood after entering the room, hoping to startle her, but the young woman didn't react at all, so he had to put it away. Fine! I'll use my looks!
"Sister-in-law, you're mistaken. We came to buy silk. I bought a few bundles of silk from you a few months ago, have you forgotten?"
Sai Kunlun said.
The woman leaned forward.
"Oh, I remember now, it was you! Not only did you peek at my breasts, but you also stole two pairs of my underwear before you left!"
Sai Kunlun hurriedly said
, "It wasn't me, it wasn't me!"
Wei Yangsheng had already figured out that the woman was nearsighted, no wonder he hadn't been fooled by his penis or his looks. He quickly chimed in,
"Sister-in-law, don't misunderstand. We heard from afar that your silk was good, so we came to buy it. Please bring out a few bundles of the best silk for us to see."
The woman didn't want to argue and brought out a few bundles of silk from the inner room.
Wei Yangsheng took the silk and looked at it. He said to the woman,
"I thought this silk looked ordinary when I held it, but now that I have it, it's so white! It must be because you have good skin. It doesn't look good on my face."
He then placed the silk next to his face, deliberately drawing the woman's attention to his face. He wanted to use his beauty to captivate her and make his move.
The woman leaned forward, looked closely, and saw that he was indeed handsome. She was somewhat willing.
She said to Wei Yangsheng and his companion, "I have a few more bundles of good silk. Let me show them to you.
" She then brought out several more bundles of silk from inside the house.
As she handed them to Wei Yangsheng, he deliberately touched her hand twice. The woman, somewhat flirting, also touched his hand.
Wei Yangsheng knew he had a chance and paid the money.
The woman said,
"I just wonder what the silver looks like on the outside, but what about inside?"
Wei Yangsheng knew the woman was testing his abilities, so he said to her,
"It's genuine gold and silver, no deception, young or old. How about I come back tonight to buy a few more bundles of silk, and we can have the silver authenticated together?"
The woman didn't answer, but her face flushed, and she smiled.
Wei Yangsheng knew this was tacit agreement, and he pulled Sai Kunlun away.
On the way, he said to Sai Kunlun,
"It's all settled now. I'll need you and me to protect me tonight, brother. I just got a new set of equipment, and if the first test fails and the woman screams, you'd better grab me and run."
Sai Kunlun said
, "No problem, brother, but you have to perform well. If you perform well, you'll become famous after this one shot; if you don't, your reputation will be ruined."
The two agreed and just hoped the sun would set quickly.
Now, let's talk about Quan Laoshi's wife, Meimei. She was originally the illegitimate daughter of the village secretary of Guojia Village in the west
. Her father dared not acknowledge her, so he adopted her as his goddaughter. She had originally married a scholar, but he loved to flaunt his wealth, and within a few years, he had caused her godfather's death through his extravagance. He was also promiscuous, wanting sex constantly, even a year into their marriage. The scholar died from exhaustion within a year.
Later, in the summer, she saw Quan Laoshi and was attracted by his three legs, so she married him and helped him open his silk shop, making a living by selling silk.
Across from Meimei's house lived a woman with a beautiful name, Yueyue. While her name was lovely, she was far from attractive—extremely ugly.
Her husband often did business with Quan Laoshi, so the two families were quite close.
One day, she saw Wei Yangsheng and Sai Kunlun come to Meimei's house to buy silk. Seeing Wei Yangsheng's handsome appearance, she was instantly captivated. It's as if half her soul was taken away.
After Wei Yangsheng and Sai Kunlun left, she went to Meimei's house to inquire about her.
"Did you see those two people buying silk just now? That young scholar, he's incredibly handsome!"
Meimei knew that her sister-in-law Yueyue was also extremely lewd, and it was fortunate that her husband was known as the "5-minute man," meaning he could only last five minutes in bed. Because Yueyue was ugly, no one would try to seduce her.
Meimei thought to herself, since she likes Weiyang Sheng and is so lewd, why not let her take the fall for me first and see how good he is? If he's not good, I'll ignore him and protect my reputation. If he is good, then when my husband Quan Laoshi isn't home, I'll have a replacement. Having made up
her mind, Yueyue said to the nanny,
"If you feel good about it, I really can act as a go-between and fulfill your wish. Don't let his handsome appearance fool you; he's a bad person. He just bought some silk and said he'd buy some more tonight. I'm a woman alone, and there are two grown men like them. I was scared, so I pretended to agree. He's coming over tonight, so you can pretend to be me. Blow out the candles, and he won't recognize you. Just go ahead and do it with him, and see what he's capable of."
"Is it really that good? Okay! Then I'll risk my life to accompany you. But let's make it clear first! If it goes well, you can't take it from me. At least don't make me get up halfway through and give it to you!"
"Don't worry, it's settled!" That
evening, Yueyue quickly finished her dinner, making sure to bring several towels, afraid that she would wet Meimei's bed because she was too wet and Meimei would get annoyed and not call her next time. She then locked the door and went to Meimei's house.
Meimei teased her deliberately
, "Hey, he just sent a letter tonight saying someone invited him to dinner, so he won't be coming over.
"
Upon hearing this, Yueyue's eyes blazed with anger, and she practically fumed.
Meimei quickly said,
"Haha, I was just kidding. You'll stay in my bed tonight, I'll go next door. Don't light any candles. Open the door quickly when you hear a knock, but don't make it too loud, or the neighbors will hear."
After saying that, the two of them washed themselves together, and Meimei went to sleep next door.
It was past ten o'clock at night, and no one had come. They thought Meimei was deliberately teasing them.
Yueyue grew anxious and opened the door to go to Meimei's room next door to ask.
As soon as she opened the door, she was embraced and kissed. Yueyue was overjoyed, knowing it was Weiyangsheng. She
quickly said to Weiyangsheng,
"Baby, it's getting late, let's go to bed!"
The two went to bed, and before Weiyangsheng had finished undressing, Yueyue was already completely naked.
Weiyangsheng thought, "Damn! She's even more eager than me!"
After undressing, Weiyangsheng went to the bed, wanting to lift her legs to his neck, but couldn't find them. They were already halfway up, their buttocks sticking out, waiting.
Weiyangsheng thought, "It seems this woman is also extremely lustful by nature; I have to perform well!"
Since that's the case, I won't be gentle anymore.
After thinking it over, he bent over, spread the woman's legs, and forcefully shoved his penis inside. Yueyue let out a bloodcurdling scream,
"Ouch, my God! Slow down, honey! It hurts so much!"
Wei Yangsheng could only slowly grind it in from the outside, and after a long time, only a tiny bit of his glans went in, the rest remaining outside. Just as he was about to go in again, Yueyue screamed again,
"Honey, please, it's too big! Spit some saliva to lubricate it!"
"I won't spit. Who uses saliva for sex?"
Seeing that he wouldn't spit, Yueyue had no choice but to spit some herself, smearing half on her genitals and half on Wei Yangsheng's penis.
Seeing that she had finished, Wei Yangsheng had her hold her buttocks with both hands and forcefully shoved it in. Yueyue screamed in pain. Wei Yangsheng didn't dare to use too much force, slowly thrusting in and out. After more than ten minutes, Yueyue got into the swing of things and no longer felt the pain, only a tingling, blissful sensation throughout her body.
Wei Yangsheng, in his first experiment, put in a lot of effort, and the two didn't finish until midnight.
Yueyue, who had never experienced such a man before, exclaimed, "So satisfying!" She felt her life had been worthwhile. Exhausted, they fell asleep in each other's arms.
Meanwhile, Meimei, who had been eavesdropping next door, first heard Yueyue screaming like a pig being slaughtered, then moaning and groaning, clearly enjoying herself. Knowing that Wei Yangsheng was well-endowed, and seeing that they were going at it until midnight, she realized Wei Yangsheng was quite skilled in bed.
Just listening from next door made her drool, and she couldn't resist any longer, thinking that such a wonderful time shouldn't just be wasted on Yueyue.
After thinking it over, he got up, lit a candle, went into the room, pulled back the covers, and shouted,
"You audacious thief! Breaking into someone's house in the middle of the night and raping their wife! Get up and explain yourself!" Wei
Yangsheng had just finished and was exhausted, sleeping soundly.
Hearing someone shout, he was startled, thinking it was Quan Laoshi and Meimei setting a trap, a charade to swindle him out of his money. He got
up and saw it was Meimei. Could they be twins?
Wei Yangsheng turned to look at the one sleeping on the bed. Damn it! What a rip-off! His ancestors for eighteen generations!
The one on the bed had a face full of youthful pimples and yellowish-brown hair. She was practically Yasha's older sister!
"Ugh..." Wei Yangsheng almost vomited.
Poor virginity, lost to such an ugly woman! How tragic! How truly tragic!
Wei Yangsheng quickly asked, "Auntie! Who are you?" Yueyue
got up contentedly.
"Don't be afraid, honey! I'm here to be Meimei's proctor. Tonight, I'll test you out for Meimei and see how you are. Okay, looks 100 points, skills 100 points. I won't disturb your beautiful time anymore. I'm full, you two have fun."
After saying that, she put on her clothes, whispered a few words in Meimei's ear, and the two of them giggled. Yueyue turned to Weiyangsheng and said,
"When do you miss me, honey? I'm right across the street. Remember to come back, honey!"
Weiyangsheng then understood. After Meimei saw Yueyue off, she said to Weiyangsheng,
"Don't be angry. I was just afraid you were all looks and no substance, so I had her test you out first."
Under the lamplight, Weiyangsheng saw how beautiful Meimei was, so he was no longer angry. He said to Meimei,
"I don't mind. Consider it practice. Hurry up, darling, time is short, and the task is important!"
After saying that, he was about to carry Meimei to bed.
Meimei pushed him away.
"I just finished with Yueyue. You don't mind her looks, but I think she's dirty. Go wash up."
Wei Yangsheng gave her a thumbs up. "Good taste!"
After washing up, the two couldn't wait to strip naked
and get into bed. Wei Yangsheng grabbed her, kissing her while groping her.
Her large breasts were so big that it took two large hands to fill one, delicate and tender. Her skin was as smooth as pearls.
Wei Yangsheng reached down and touched her. Haha, he hit the jackpot! A white tiger? Could this be the legendary white tiger?
Wei Yangsheng couldn't wait any longer. He turned around and climbed on top of her, putting her legs up over his neck, ready to give her a hard time and see if she dared to lie to him again.
But then, with a "slip," he went straight in and finished. Meimei didn't even show any pain, just let out two soft moans.
Wei Yangsheng thought, "It seems this honest guy Quan is really something else! I'll have to spar with him another day."
After thinking this, he mustered all his energy and prepared for a good fight!
This Meimei is really something else. Wei Yangsheng's lower body was like a horsewhip, as thick and long as an arm, and even after inserting it, it still didn't reach the bottom. How deep do you think Meimei's lower body is?
At least a foot, right? A foot? I reckon her stomach is all her lower body.
Seeing this, Wei Yangsheng put a pillow under Meimei's waist and said nothing, just treating her like a pump.
"Pumping machine, pumping machine, I'm a happy pumping machine!"
Wei Yangsheng silently chanted in his heart.
Meimei was initially unmoved, but after a while, she gradually came to feel it, moaning and groaning, "Baby, darling, son."
Wei Yangsheng knew she was about to come, it seemed he was about to unleash his ultimate move!
"Lotus Gathering at the Top! I'm thrusting, thrusting, thrusting, thrusting..."
"Ah!" Meimei screamed, disregarding everything, and began to squirt unrestrainedly. (Squirting—female ejaculation, commonly known as vaginal ejaculation or squirting )
The lower body gushed out like a spring, no, like a tap.
Wei Yangsheng was about to grab a towel to stop it when Meimei said,
"No."
She then lifted the mattress, revealing a hole in the middle of the bed with a basin underneath. Meimei and Quan Laoshi didn't need to wipe when they did it; the fluid just flowed into the basin. Wei Yangsheng
thought, "Oh my god! This is going to fill a basin today! I'd better hurry!
" He then put in all his strength. He thrust, he pulled, he turned! He used every trick in the book.
The two of them continued until dawn, when the roosters crowed, before finally stopping. Tragically, Wei Yangsheng was completely drained, and the basin wasn't even full.
From then on, Wei Yangsheng stayed at Meimei's house every day, since there was no one else around. The two of them even stopped wearing clothes, sleeping naked, running around naked, and eating naked. It's convenient, fast, and stylish.
Ten days later, Quan Laoshi returned from his business trip, and the two could no longer maintain their intimacy.
Sai Kunlun, fearing Wei Yangsheng's youthful impatience, often pretended to be a customer to tip them off.
Meanwhile, Meimei was also suffering from insomnia and loss of appetite. Looking at Quan Laoshi's frail, rotting body, Wei Yangsheng seemed even more handsome.
Meimei thought to herself, "Many men are handsome but lack 'tools,' while others are well-endowed but look like withered tree bark. I've finally found one who's both handsome and capable; I must hold onto him. If all else fails, I'll elope with Wei Yangsheng! Life is short; I can't waste it."
Having made up her mind, she secretly wrote a letter, intending to have Sai Kunlun deliver it to Wei Yangsheng the next time he visited.
Meimei, being the village secretary's goddaughter, was quite literate. The letter flowed smoothly: "
My dearest Wei Yangsheng:
Since you left, I haven't been able to swallow my food. I can barely manage
a third of what I eat. I've now made up my mind to follow you for life." You may quickly make arrangements, or you may trouble
Sai Kunlun to come and steal from me, or I
may become Hong Fu and come to you. Just set a date and agree on a place to meet me, so that we don't miss each other. This is my earnest advice.
If you fear disaster and hesitate to do this risky thing, then you are a heartless and unfaithful person. You may write to
me and sever all ties from this day forward. Never see me again. If you do see me again, I will bite your flesh and eat it like pork or dog meat.
I have more to say, so I send this to you.
Your future wife: Meimei.
This is Meimei's original letter; I've only changed the title and ending. Everything else is the original.
But Meimei thought, what if Quan Laoshi doesn't give up? Yes, I'll make a scene with him first, and it would be best if we got a divorce. Even if we don't get a divorce, I'll annoy him first. If I elope with someone else, he'll have to go to great lengths to find me.
Having decided, I'll do nothing all day, just eat and sleep, and when I have nothing to do, I'll find fault with Quan Laoshi. If I'm in a good mood, I'll curse him a couple of times. When she's in a bad mood, she'll grab him and beat him!
At night, if Quan Laoshi serves her well, all is well; if not, he'll kick her a few times as soon as he pulls up her pants.
The most poisonous heart is a woman's; this woman will never give up until she gets what she wants .
Why is Quan Laoshi called Quan Laoshi? Because he's honest, never talking back when scolded, never fighting back when hit. Even the neighbors can't stand it anymore. Quan
Laoshi thinks, "My wife used to be so beautiful, gentle, and virtuous. How come she's become like a shrew?" He's sure there's a reason. So he goes to the neighbors to ask around.
"When I went out on business last time, did anyone come to my house?"
No secrets stay hidden forever. Besides, when Quan Laoshi isn't home, Wei Yangsheng and Meimei are always running around naked and having sex naked; who wouldn't know?
But Wei Yangsheng always goes at night when everyone's asleep; it's Sai Kunlun who tipes them off at the silk shop during the day. So the neighbors all think Meimei and Sai Kunlun are having an affair.
The neighbor knew Quan Laoshi was an honest and kind man, and that being cuckolded was a terrible loss. So he explained the situation to him.
"Sai Kunlun is not someone to be trifled with. That guy comes and goes without a trace. He might just kick the bucket while you're sound asleep one night. Besides, even if you catch him in the act, what about your wife? She might just run off with someone else anyway."
Quan Laoshi said, "Maybe I should move away. Leave this place of trouble and live a good life with my wife."
"But Sai Kunlun is a wanderer. Where can you run to? He'll find out eventually, and you'll never have a peaceful life again."
This really worried Quan Laoshi. What kind of bastard is this, messing with my wife? He can't afford to offend him, and he can't escape him. What should he do?
Someone else said
, "That slut has already cheated on you with someone else, what do you need her for? That Sai Kunlun is a thief, he's rich, why not just sell your wife to him? You'll get a hundred or two taels of silver, and with that money, you can marry another one, right?"
Quan Laoshi cursed inwardly, but he had no choice; it seemed to be the best solution.
"Then let's do it this way. Please ask the neighbors to find two witnesses to speak to Sai Kunlun." Some of
the neighbors, being nosy, agreed. They would go talk to Sai Kunlun tomorrow.
Meanwhile, Wei Yangsheng noticed that Quan Laoshi had noticed something amiss and was keeping a closer eye on Meimei. Wei Yangsheng
was at a loss, unable to eat or sleep properly. His poor manhood, which had just tasted the sweetness of love, was constantly erect. He couldn't even turn over in bed at night.
Just then, Sai Kunlun brought back Meimei's letter. Wei Yangsheng was overjoyed and immediately told Sai Kunlun to help him steal Meimei away.
Sai Kunlun said,
"Stealing her out is easy, but Quan Laoshi is poor and lacks ambition. He finally managed to marry a wife. If you steal her, won't he fight you to the death? He's got nothing to lose, why would he be afraid of someone wearing shoes? When you steal her, you should leave him one or two hundred taels of silver. He can marry another one when he has the money."
Wei Yangsheng said, "That's possible, but I only brought two hundred taels of silver with me when I left. I've been chasing girls and doing human transplants, so I don't have much money left. What should I do?"
"Don't worry, brother, I have plenty of silver. Take it and use it first. You should write back to Meimei and arrange a date to elope."
Wei Yangsheng quickly wrote a reply and arranged for Sai Kunlun to steal her out at night three days later.
The next day, Sai Kunlun was cooking at home when several of his neighbors came over and said to him,
"That Quan Laoshi fellow has been having a run of bad luck lately. His business failed, and his family is so poor they can't even afford to eat. He's thinking of selling his wife, or they'll both starve to death. I think you're a chivalrous and righteous man, so we neighbors are acting as matchmakers. You'll save their lives, and Quan Laoshi will have some money to start a business and survive. His wife won't have to starve to death."
Sai Kunlun thought, "Perfect, saves me from stealing."
He asked the neighbors,
"How much does he want?"
"It's a second marriage for a young woman, so he shouldn't ask for too much. Let's say two hundred taels (two hundred thousand yuan) for good luck."
Sai Kunlun thought to himself, "Holy crap, these days you can marry a sixteen or seventeen-year-old girl for less than twenty taels of silver. That's outrageous!" He looked at them without saying anything.
The neighbor, seeing this, knew it was too expensive and quickly said,
"It's just a life-saving fee, if you think it's too expensive, sir, we can lower the price. Let's make it a lucky number, one hundred and twenty taels."
Sai Kunlun thought to himself, even if I steal it, I'll still keep one hundred taels. Fine, I'll just buy it openly, it'll be 20 taels more expensive. So he agreed.
Seeing that he agreed, the neighbor quickly called out to the door,
"Quan Laoshi, come quickly, they've agreed!"
Quan Laoshi entered to make the transaction, and Sai Kunlun took out the silver and handed it to him. The next day, Quan Laoshi hired a sedan chair to bring Meimei over . That very night,
Wei Yangsheng and Meimei were considered husband and wife. After becoming husband and wife, Wei Yangsheng and Meimei moved to a quieter place, and the two indulged in passionate lovemaking, day and night. Sleeping naked, running naked, and even eating naked were commonplace.
But just over a month later, after Meimei's first period, she became pregnant. This delighted Wei Yangsheng and Meimei immensely. It seems that being an American exchange student isn't necessarily an expert after all.
When Meimei was four or five months pregnant, her belly grew bigger. Wei Yangsheng dared not have sex with her anymore, and to allow her to rest properly, he moved to the study to sleep.
She could manage for a day or two, but a woman's pregnancy lasts ten months, and she can't have sex for a long time after giving birth. How could Wei Yangsheng possibly endure that? So she took out the little notebook she used to keep when
she lived in the temple. There were three three-star entries, but no information. She then looked at the two-star entries one by one. She saw the first two-star entry, a woman named Xiangyun. She vaguely remembered her; a woman in her twenties,
with a seductive expression. When she walked past, a fragrance wafted over her, unlike perfume, probably her natural scent. She seemed interested in her when she left, leaving behind a scented fan with a poem on it. She had planned to visit her in a few days, but then she got distracted by Meimei's situation.
She quickly checked the address below, and lo and behold, it was right on her street! She checked the house number... Haha, she was overjoyed! It was right next door! And then she looked closer... Oh my god! Her bedroom was right next to her study, separated only by a wall.
After several days of inquiries, Wei Yangsheng learned about Xiangyu's family situation. It turned out that Xiangyun's husband was called "Xuan Ganzi," a man of high aspirations but low abilities. He was somewhat talented, but unfortunately, his ancestors hadn't accumulated any virtue; at over fifty years old, he was still only a scholar (a low-ranking official). He taught for the children of wealthy families, only returning home for two or three days a month.
This...this was practically a cooked duck!
This...this was practically a cooked duck!
That very day, Wei Yangsheng bought a ladder. That night, seeing the light on in the room, he took the fan Xiangyun had lost and secretly climbed to the second-floor window to peek.
Opening the window, unfortunately, it faced directly towards
the toilet. Facing the toilet was bad enough, but it was also directly facing the toilet bowl.
Facing the toilet was bad enough, but the toilet bowl was full.
And to make matters worse, someone was defecating on it.
"Go ahead and poop, but why is it so hard... You're so
irritating..."
A pair of snow-white buttocks were right in front of her face. Wei Yangsheng was secretly pleased when, "Splat!" A piece of poop fell into the toilet, spraying her face with excrement and urine.
"Fragrant, no wonder she's called Xiangyun, even her poop smells good."
Wei Yangsheng waited for her to finish and wipe her bottom. She whispered,
"Beautiful lady..." Her voice wasn't too loud.
Xiangyun was startled! When did poop become sentient?! It can talk!
"It's me."
Xiangyun turned her head and saw a devilish figure! A Nicholas Tse emerged from the toilet.
Looking closer, wasn't this the handsome man she'd met at the temple of the Goddess of Fertility? A surge of joy welled up inside her.
It turned out that Xiangyun's husband was always away, and she wasn't exactly a chaste woman. That day, I met Wei Yangsheng at the temple of the Goddess of Fertility. Feeling a bit interested, I deliberately tossed him a fan. Who knew that half a year would pass without a word?
"Where have you been all this time? Where are you living now?"
Wei Yangsheng dared not mention Meimei, so he said he had been studying hard to pass the imperial examination.
"I live next door to you. I have a concubine at home, a gift from a friend. She's four or five months pregnant and resting."
Xiangyun asked, "I deliberately tossed you a fan that day, do you still have it?"
Upon hearing this, Wei Yangsheng quickly pulled the fan from his robes. Hurry, it was time to make a move!
But Wei Yangsheng was standing on a ladder. Losing his balance while handing over the fan, he hurriedly used his hand to steady it, and the fan "thud..." fell into the toilet!
Xiangyun, seeing the fan in the toilet, angrily turned and went to bed.
Wei Yangsheng was about to climb in through the window to apologize when he heard rustling footsteps outside. He quickly slid down and into the study. The next day, Wei Yangsheng arranged for Meimei to sleep early. Late at night, he went to his study and found the ladder from the previous night still there, but the light in Xiangyun's room was off.
Wei Yangsheng climbed up the ladder. The window was ajar; Xiangyun had deliberately left it open for him.
Wei Yangsheng slipped into the room in the dark and slowly made his way to Xiangyun's bed. He found her fast asleep and quickly undressed and got into bed. He touched her and found her completely naked. He tried to pry her legs open, but the tighter they were pressed together, the more Wei Yangsheng realized she was feigning sleep.
"Where did this lecherous thief come from, entering a woman's house in the middle of the night
to force himself on her?" It turned out that Xiangyun, anticipating Wei Yangsheng's visit, had bathed early and deliberately left the window ajar. Hearing him enter, she turned away, pretending to be asleep.
Seeing him in bed, she feigned a fright.
Wei Yangsheng whispered,
"Sweetheart, it's me. Don't shout, or the neighbors will hear."
He then pried open Xiangyun's legs.
Xiangyun said,
"Don't rush me. Let me ask you first, why did you kowtow to those three beautiful women at the Temple of the Goddess of Fertility that day? Did you like them? Did you play around with them for half a year, and then they ignored you before you came to me?"
Upon hearing this, Wei Yangsheng quickly swore,
"My wife misunderstands me. To tell you the truth, I haven't seen them once since that day. If I'm lying, may I be cursed to take the high-speed train tomorrow!"
Seeing his vehement oath, Xiangyun guessed it was true. However, she was still furious and wouldn't let him in.
Wei Yangsheng said
, "Is my wife angry that I kowtowed to those three? That's easy. Come, come, I'll make it up to you double."
With that, he got off the bed, knelt on the ground, and kowtowed to Xiangyun.
By the moonlight, Xiangyun said to Weiyangsheng,
"Others kowtow with their heads bowed, but you just nod? No sincerity! Go masturbate!"
Weiyangsheng quickly replied,
"My wife misunderstands. It's just that my manhood is too thick and long, I can't bend over."
Xiangyun looked closely and realized Weiyangsheng was telling the truth. Seeing his handsome appearance and large size, she was overjoyed. She said to Weiyangsheng, "Come on, I forgive you."
Weiyangsheng eagerly jumped onto the bed, parted Xiangyun's legs, and a strange fragrance wafted over, instantly making her feel refreshed. He said to Xiangyun,
"I've smelled many women's genitals, but this is the first time I've smelled such a unique fragrance in yours. Other women's genitals either have no smell at all, or, even worse, there was this woman named Yueyue last time, when she took off her underwear, there was a strong smell of urea, it almost blinded me!"
After saying that, he lowered his head and stuck out his tongue to kiss her. Firstly, Xiangyun's genitals were indeed a rare find; secondly, kissing her would allow him to get some saliva, making it easier to penetrate later; and thirdly, he was trying his best to please Xiangyun, hoping to get information about the other three exquisite young women, so he worked even harder.
Xiangyun, after being kissed like this by Weiyang Sheng, also produced quite a bit of vaginal fluid.
Xiangyun was "Xuan Ganzi's" second wife; his original wife had died.
In his youth, "Xuan Ganzi" was also a womanizer, and he liked to seduce other people's wives. Now that he was older, he had overdrawn his resources and become more honest. He said he was going out to teach, but in reality, he was avoiding doing his homework.
So Xiangyun had never been truly satisfied, and today, having just encountered Weiyangsheng, her pent-up lust, which had been building up for a month, could no longer be contained.
Seeing that she had almost finished, Weiyangsheng mounted her, carefully inching in and out, cautiously rubbing against her with his penis, not daring to enter rashly.
Xiangyun said,
"My darling, come in quickly, I can't take it anymore."
Seeing that Xiangyun was almost there, Wei Yangsheng thrust his hips forward, penetrating only halfway. Xiangyun let out a soft moan, immediately feeling her lower body filled, a little painful, but very fulfilling. Afraid that Wei Yangsheng wasn't giving it his all, she stuck her buttocks out and swayed from side to side.
Wei Yangsheng thrust a few dozen times, immediately feeling a warm current flowing down below, knowing that Xiangyun was wet. He quickly bent down, catching it with his mouth and then licking it clean with his tongue.
Xiangyun had never felt so satisfied before. Having just wet herself, she was also aroused, eagerly awaiting Wei Yangsheng's penetration. She took his penis in her hand and tried to insert it, but halfway in, Wei Yangsheng stopped moving.
Xiangyun asked him,
"Why did you only go in halfway? What are you doing leaving the other half outside?"
Wei Yangsheng replied,
"I was afraid that if I went in all the way, I would give you too many orgasms, and your body wouldn't be able to handle it."
Xiangyun's lower body had already been stretched open by Wei Yangsheng, and she felt empty inside. She said to Wei Yangsheng,
"Do your best. If you make me feel good, I'll tell you about those three women."
Just as she was waiting for this, Wei Yangsheng immediately asked,
"You're not lying to me
, are you? Aren't you jealous?" "Sexual entertainment is better with more people, especially since we both have families. We have to be responsible for each other. If you're going to cheat, then cheat to your heart's content. You're holding me while thinking about other people. It's better for everyone to enjoy it together."
Upon hearing this, Wei Yangsheng immediately became excited! Group sex! He had been searching high and low, and now he found it on Baidu!
He immediately put all his effort into satisfying Xiangyun...
until dawn, when the two of them finally finished.
Xiangyun then said to Weiyangsheng,
"Those three women are related by marriage. They are my husband's second aunt's cousins, the granddaughter of the second uncle of the second uncle's second great-uncle. I call the younger one 'sister,' and the older one 'aunt.' The two 'sisters' are very close because they are about the same age.
That day, I was at home, and she came to play with me. She told me that she and her aunt went to the temple of the Goddess of Fertility to burn incense, and a handsome scholar kowtowed to the three of them and described his appearance. That's how I knew it was you, which is why I asked about you.
We are good sisters who share both good times and bad. I'll introduce you to them another day. You're so handsome, and you have such a treasure. I guarantee things will work out!"
Upon hearing this, Weiyangsheng immediately danced with joy, crawled on the ground, and nodded more than a dozen times to Xiangyun. Turning back to that unfortunate boy—Quan Laoshi.
After selling his wife to Sai Kunlun, Quan Laoshi knew he had lost face big time, being cuckolded. He stopped doing business and stayed home all day, brooding.
Later, he heard that Meimei hadn't married Sai Kunlun, but a handsome scholar named Wei Yangsheng.
Upon further inquiry, he learned that it wasn't Sai Kunlun who had cuckolded him, but Wei Yangsheng, which infuriated him even more. "
Damn it, Sai Kunlun! I can't beat you, so you, a mere scholar, bully me too! Don't you even know how honest I, Quan Laoshi, am!"
He was determined to sue, but then he thought again. Since Sai Kunlun was willing to stand up for Wei Yangsheng, their relationship must be extraordinary. Sai Kunlun had money, and the presiding judge had just been transferred from the Yunnan court; he had no chance of winning.
Quan Laoshi then inquired about Wei Yangsheng's background and learned that he was from out of town and had a wife.
Quan Laoshi thought, "Since you can seduce my wife, then I'll seduce yours and make you wish you were dead."
Having made up his mind, he sold everything in the house. He was determined to seduce Wei Yangsheng's wife; he wouldn't give up until he did!
After traveling for several days, they arrived at Wei Yangsheng's house. Upon inquiring, they learned that things weren't going well; for days, Wei Yangsheng's house remained tightly shut, with no one seen coming or going. Further inquiries revealed that Wei Yangsheng's father-in-law was a typical first-generation Chinese recluse!
Quan Laoshi found a place to stay near his house and waited for an opportunity.
God says that opportunity is equal, given to both good and bad people.
A few days later, Quan Laoshi went to the Tiefei Daoist's house again and saw a sign hanging at the gate:
"Wasteland for Rent, First Planting Rent-Free."
Quan Laoshi hurriedly asked the Tiefei Daoist's neighbor,
"The Tiefei Daoist's wasteland is for rent. I want to apply. What are the conditions?"
The neighbor said,
"The Tiefei Daoist's wasteland? You want to rent it? That guy picks his asshole and licks his fingers. He'll even pick up a bean curd in his poop and eat it. He's incredibly stingy. Other people's wasteland is rent-free for three years, but his is only rent-free for one year. You also have to work for him all the time, doing this and that, without getting paid a penny. You'll be working for him, and he won't even give you a place to live. Would you still want to work for him?"
Quan Laoshi thought to himself, as long as I can get in touch with him, I'll have a 30% chance. If I can work for him often, the chances will be even greater. Others are afraid of physical labor, but I'd love for him to use me often. After thinking it over, Quan Laoshi said to his neighbor,
"I've lost money in business. All I need is a place to stay; what more could I ask for? I just need something to eat. Could you please let them know?"
"His door is always closed. We neighbors knock, but he won't open it. We can't tell them for you,"
the neighbor replied. Just then, the neighbor pointed behind him and said,
"Hey! You're lucky! Look, the rat's come out of its hole; it's buying tofu over there."
Quan Laoshi turned around and saw a dignified-looking old man buying tofu at the door. He quickly went over.
"Are you Tiefei Daoist, sir? Do you have some wasteland to rent out? My business has failed, and I have plenty of strength. I'd like to rent some land to cultivate and support my family,"
Quan Laoshi said to Tiefei Daoist.
Seeing that Quan Laoshi was strong and capable, the Iron-Door Taoist asked him,
"Do you know the terms of my rental agreement?"
"Yes, I do," Quan replied. "My business has failed, and all I have left is my strength. It's already a great kindness that you've taken me in. I'm all alone now, without family, so I can just build a house on this wasteland to make a living."
Seeing that Quan Laoshi was strong, honest, and reliable, the Iron-Door Taoist agreed to rent to him, and the two signed a lease.
Quan Laoshi rented the wasteland from the Iron-Door Taoist, bought timber, built a small house, and purchased farming tools. Every morning at four o'clock, he would get up and go to the land to cultivate the wasteland.
The Iron-Door Taoist's house had a small attic facing his wasteland. Every morning, the Iron-Door Taoist would go to the attic. He was pleased to see Quan Laoshi already working in the fields. Whenever there was heavy or tiring work to be done at home… Quan Laoshi was always at people's beck and call, not only refusing wages but also only eating half-full when offered food,
which made Tie Fei Daoren even more fond of
him. Quan Laoshi's true intentions weren't what they seemed; he diligently performed his duties every day to lower Tie Fei Daoren's guard. Later, he worried that Wei Yangsheng's wife might be ugly, but after frequently working at Tie Fei's house and seeing an extremely beautiful woman whom the maids called "Miss," he realized that Wei Yangsheng's wife wasn't ugly at all, and thus worked even harder.

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