【The Confession of Married Woman Ruoning】(01) Author: panda86

Author: panda86
Word Count: 8311

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"I said I want to eat green kumquats, not these yellow ones, I want to eat sour ones! I don't care, I just want
to eat them , go buy them for me!"

Watching my husband's dejected figure walk out of the house again to satisfy my whims, I felt no joy
at all .

This is already the umpteenth time my husband and I have argued this week. The reasons for our arguments are always
very simple, from trivial matters like groceries to major
issues like caring for our daughter and even our sex life.

This year marks our tenth wedding anniversary. We've long since gone from blushing and shyly holding hands to a
point where we wouldn't even glance at each other while wearing underwear at home.

My husband has a respectable job as a lawyer, but his appearance is inversely proportional to his abilities. He's an unremarkable
1.7 meters tall, but weighs over 160 pounds, and just watching him walk makes me feel tired.

When I was young, I was the brightest star in my class. Many boys fawned over me,
and I could boss them around like a princess without complaint; they would even greet me with
smiles .

"You should find a boyfriend and settle down soon, or all the good ones will be taken. Settle down with someone decent;
life doesn't have to be so perfect."

This was my mother's advice when I was twenty-seven. I had just broken up with my American boyfriend. My
classmates and friends my age were probably already mothers, while I was still aimlessly wandering the marathon of
love .

Because of my own superior qualities, I never worried about becoming
one of those so-called "leftover women." Unless I found "the one"—my ideal man—I wouldn't obediently settle down and become a
docile deer.

Whether my luck was truly terrible or my mother's prediction came true, I continued my
carefree life, indulging in my prince and princess dreams that seemed to have no future. Until my thirtieth
birthday, I was still single.

I started reducing my social interactions, trying to avoid gatherings with friends as much as possible. Every time we got together, I could
feel their ambiguous smiles mocking my status as an old maid.

Even those boys who used to chase after me in school, whose faces I could barely remember,
would just give me a simple greeting, the elation gone. When they got together, it was all
about work wives, and children.

I felt society's malice towards me even among the girls. Their conversations no longer revolved
around Hermes bags or Chanel perfumes; the topics always returned to husbands and families
.

After that class reunion, I vowed never to attend such gatherings again. A
man who had pursued me in college, somehow got hold of my private information and messaged me
. It seems he's still keeping tabs on me all these years later.

My vanity was satisfied again: 'Look, no matter what, I'm still the most charming and vibrant
rose.'

In every respect, this man's conditions were only average compared to my standards for a partner, but I
enjoyed being admired and didn't reject his advances, starting to date him.

Our relationship progressed rapidly. At his age, he wasn't a young man anymore; men like him fully
understood what women wanted and what they could offer.

In just three months, my relationship with this classmate named Lei developed quickly. What he didn't know was that while
dating him, I was also maintaining ambiguous relationships with other men who were interested in me,
hoping to gain more security.

As we got older and met more often, sleeping together was only a matter of time. In the fourth month,
Lei and I finally slept together.

"Ruoning, you're so beautiful. I liked you back in school, but I never dared to say it,"

he later told me about his crush on me in school. I smiled faintly; this was something I had already
expected .

"When are you planning to take me home to meet your parents?"

Lei started to get nervous; his evasive words made me uneasy.

After some time, when I brought up the necessity of both of us going home to meet his parents to confirm our relationship again, he simply flew into
a rage and refused to take me home to meet his parents.

We started a period of cold war, and for the first time, I panicked. Usually, I was the one ignoring others,
while other men would chase after me like lapdogs. This time, Lei didn't send me a single text message or make a single
phone call.

"Him? I think I heard from others that he recently got a new girlfriend, but I don't know much else."

When I couldn't wait any longer and subtly inquired about Lei's recent activities with other classmates, I received a
bolt from the blue . I never thought that I, Su Yuanyuan, would be dumped one day, and I was so slow to realize it.

"Listen to me, have your Aunt Zhao help you find a suitable partner."

My mother was probably even more anxious than me and started asking people to arrange blind dates for me.

"This one is good; he says he has a respectable job as a lawyer and a very good temper. You should meet him."

After countless blind dates, I met my husband, Han, who was a distant relative
of .

Obese, short, bespectacled, and not funny at all, he didn't meet any of my initial
criteria for a partner, except for his good temper, which could be considered a minor advantage.

And so we got married. Just two months after we met, we went to the civil affairs bureau and got our marriage certificate. I
could n't wait any longer; I was afraid I'd go crazy.

Several times after the wedding, my husband thoughtfully drove to pick me up from work. Looking at his overweight
figure really didn't know how to explain to my colleagues that he was my husband.

My husband probably sensed my discomfort, because from then on, he definitely wouldn't
come to pick me up unless I asked him to.

In the second year of our marriage, my daughter, the fruit of my love with Han, was born. I felt no
joy as a mother, because it was the beginning of my nightmare.

Shortly after giving birth, due to the company's exploitative practices, I had to return to work early, leaving my daughter's care to
my mother and husband.

Every time I returned home exhausted after a long day, hearing that annoying baby's cries would
inexplicably I wouldn't give my mother or husband a kind look, and they tolerated it without saying much
.

The final straw was the company's massive layoffs due to poor performance, and I was
among those laid off.

An imperfect marriage, never having been prepared to be a mother, a daughter who looked like her father—small-nosed and
unattractive—and then being laid off—it felt like all the misfortunes had been transferred to me.

I dared not confide my bitterness to anyone; that beautiful, strong-willed princess couldn't bear
even the slightest bit of cold talk or ridicule.

Every extra moment I spent idly at home fueled my anger, which eventually boiled over and
was unleashed on my husband. But he was such a nice guy, or to
put it bluntly, a pushover. No matter how much I yelled at him, he seemed unfazed, always smiling at me.

His smile felt like a mockery: "See, no matter how beautiful you are or how many people like you, you still have to
marry me in the end."

As the arguments increased, the conflict escalated until my husband remained silent while
I continued to yell and curse at him, severely disrupting my mother's and daughter's rest.

"Shouldn't you see a doctor?"

My mother, with her experience, suggested I might have postpartum depression and urged me to see a doctor.

Unfortunately, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression.

My life has never been darker than that period; it was like climbing two hundred flights of stairs,
slipping, and falling to the ground, shattering into pieces.

"Your condition isn't too serious yet. Try to relax and don't overthink things. Postpartum
depression is quite common, so there's nothing to worry about."

The doctor who examined me, a man in his thirties, spoke softly and comfortably. My husband
had pulled several strings to find him; he was an expert, named Liu Tao.

"Is your husband home most of the time?"

he asked, looking down at his report as if speaking to an old friend.

"He's a lawyer, and he's mostly at his firm. He's quite busy."

Liu Tao looked up in surprise, exclaiming in an exaggerated tone, "That's really impressive! I
didn't ask my friend much before. He's not simple."

Then he sighed regretfully, "But that makes sense. Most cases of depression like yours stem from
your own psychological pressure, coupled with your husband's limited time with you. Over time, this can easily lead to a buildup of emotions."

At that moment, I truly felt that he was the only person in the world who understood me.
It was as if .

Since becoming depressed, I've rarely spoken, even to my own mother. That day, in his office,
it felt like I poured out everything I'd held back for months.

"You're overthinking it. How could your husband, who married such a beautiful and gentle wife like you, possibly
have other women outside?"

This had been a major factor in my arguments with my husband lately. I started to suspect he was secretly seeing
other women, even though I had no evidence, and his appearance didn't seem to fit the bill. But once
the thought took hold, it was hard to shake off.

"No, he used to talk to me a lot when he came home, but now he doesn't
talk to me at all, and he just goes to bed at night. He must be seeing other women."

Liu Tao ignored my suspicions and instead asked, "Is your sex life with your husband still
harmonious ?"

His question stunned me. It wasn't that I was angry at his unreasonable behavior, but his question made me realize that
we hadn't had sex since I gave birth.

Actually, my husband has a physical defect; his penis is smaller than average, and his excess fat
makes it appear even smaller.

I married him at thirty-one, a time
when , but I still tried my best to act like I
enjoyed it, out of consideration for his feelings.

After giving birth to our daughter, he tried to be intimate with me several times, but whenever his fat hands touched my body
, I felt nauseous and extremely uncomfortable, so I refused.

When he repeatedly begged for intimacy, I bluntly told him
I wasn't interested and was sexually frigid, so he shouldn't bother me anymore.

My husband seemed to be sulking and hasn't touched me since. I
've told Liu Tao everything; we only met once, but I feel a strange trust in him.

In the evenings, my husband is still busy working in his study. Through Dr. Liu's therapy, my
emotions have stabilized a lot, and I can sometimes joke with him. But when he tries anything further, my
body still reacts negatively. Seeing his disappointed expression, I feel a strange sense of satisfaction.

"Knock, knock, knock."

I knocked on the door and went in without waiting for my husband's answer.

"This is ginseng soup Mom made for you."

Before I could finish speaking, I saw my husband staring at me with wide, shocked eyes
, looking like he'd done something wrong. My eyes glanced down and I noticed his pants were still hanging on the floor.

My face flushed, and I realized what he'd been doing in the room. I put the soup down and
walked out without saying a word.

"Wife, could you..."

my husband called after me. I knew what he wanted to say, but I still told him coldly and resolutely,
"Don't work too late. Take care of yourself. I'm going to sleep."

My husband didn't say another word and let me leave the room.

Yes, our sex life had reached the point of nearing its end, and divorce seemed
inevitable . Neither of us dared to say it first.

"Do you have time tonight? Let's go see a movie,"

Liu Tao suddenly invited me after a routine consultation.

"Go to the movies? Just the two of us?"

He nodded firmly.

"Okay, see you tonight."

I hesitated for a moment, but finally agreed. During the time I spent with him and he treated me, we
had become close friends who could talk about anything. I knew he was married, but I still
inexplicably . That evening, I dressed up carefully at home and told my husband I had a friend's party. I could see the suspicion

in his eyes , but he didn't ask any further questions. "Wow! Your dress is so beautiful, it looks great on you." "Thank you." Liu Tao and I walked into the cinema side by side. The movie was so-so, nothing special. After leaving the theater and walking out the door, he offered to take me home. Seeing that it was still early, I suggested we take a walk. He accompanied me as we wandered aimlessly along the bustling street. I noticed that he tried to take my hand several times, but hesitated and pulled back. But just as we were crossing the street, a bicycle sped past us. He nimbly pulled me back to prevent me from getting hurt. This grab naturally landed on my arm, and he didn't let go, our hands clasped together so naturally. "I'm almost home, I'll stop here, I'm afraid..." "I understand." He gazed at me tenderly, his eyes filled with reluctance. "Next time, can we go to the movies together again?" I looked at him, and he anxiously awaited my answer. I pulled my hand away, leaving only a goodbye, and ran home. I was afraid that if I lingered for even a second longer, if I hesitated even a second longer, I would completely succumb to his charms that night. I didn't go to the subsequent follow-up appointments. Liu Tao kept leaving me messages on his phone, apologizing for his impulsiveness that night. He didn't know that it wasn't necessary; it was exactly what I liked about him doing. About two weeks later, I reappeared at his clinic. When he saw me, he stood there blankly, as if he had forgotten how to speak. That noon, we ate together, went shopping in the afternoon, spent the evening at the movies, and naturally ended up in the same bed, entwined together. "Do you love me?" I knew perfectly well that I had a husband, a family, and most importantly, a daughter; a relationship with him was impossible. But deep down, I still hoped to hear his answer. "I love you, I love you so much." Simple, straightforward words seemed to evoke stronger emotions. His penis was happily roaming my whole body felt weak. This feeling was something I had never experienced with my husband. I was willingly conquered and dominated, my body swaying according to his will. I realized that sex was such a wonderful thing. How many years had it been since I had experienced this with a man? Afterwards, a cigarette was like heaven. I forgot which boyfriend I had slept with told me this . Liu Tao was also leaning against the wall, a cigarette dangling from his mouth, while I nestled in his arms like a docile little woman. "Was it good?" The outwardly refined Liu Tao was just like most men in bed—violent, vulgar, and wanting to possess everything about a woman . I had seen too many men like this in my life; I knew exactly what they wanted . "Was it more enjoyable than when your husband fucked you?" Liu Tao, pushing his luck, wanted to satisfy his male vanity by talking to me. Having slept with a married man , it's natural to compare his sexual performance to her husband's. Without a second thought, I gave him the answer, even revealing my husband's secret about his small penis . He laughed heartily, looking quite smug. Listening to a married woman crying in his arms about her husband's lack of sexual prowess was incredibly amusing and exciting. "Why did you forget to turn off the computer?" That day, my husband had something urgent and rushed back to the office at noon. When I went into his study to clean, I discovered his office computer was still on. I had previously told Liu Tao that my husband hadn't touched me for almost half a year, and he didn't hesitate to mock him, suggesting he might be secretly taking care of himself every night, and that there might be a lot of adult videos on the computer. So when I saw the computer still on, I suddenly remembered his words. I wanted to see if my husband really did what he thought, having downloaded many obscene videos for future use. Sure enough, I found it. My husband studied law and knew nothing about or was interested in electronics, so I easily located the location of his videos on the computer. However, like many lawyers, he had marked each video with numbers and letters, making it look like a work file. Out of curiosity, I clicked on the videos to see what my husband's sexual preferences were. The first few videos were filled with scenes of whips and dripping wax, which made me feel nauseous. Closing one and opening another revealed countless male porn stars surrounding delicate female porn stars, emitting lewd and ambiguous laughter. The videos I opened afterward were all the same two types, making me even more disgusted with my husband. I never imagined his taste in pornography would be so repulsive. Later, I told Liu Tao about this, and he told me that my husband might have unusual tastes, perhaps enjoying SM or group sex. If that were the case, my affair might be a happy thing for him. I couldn't believe there were men in the world who enjoyed seeing their wives cheat, but after Liu Tao's professional analysis as a psychologist , and considering my husband's pathetic state and his small penis, it wasn't impossible that he might be psychologically twisted because of it. "You can test him when you get home," she said. I seemed to have discovered something particularly amusing. For those few nights, I dressed extra sexy, feeling both annoyed and secretly pleased by my husband's lecherous gaze, and occasionally teasing his penis. But when he was about to undress and get down to business, I would feign anger and find various excuses to refuse him. My husband would instantly deflate like a punctured balloon, sitting there dejectedly. Seeing him like that, I felt a secret satisfaction; this revenge seemed to release all the resentment I had accumulated over the years.

For a long time afterward, I teased my husband like this, constantly pushing him to the brink of explosion, only to
push him off a cliff at the last moment. Nothing pleased me more than seeing his dejected face.

During this period, my husband also underwent a huge change. He often sat alone silently, and
more importantly, he began to openly vent his pent-up desires and energy at home.

Before, he might have just hidden in his study watching porn to relieve his physical needs, but
now he would take out his penis anytime, anywhere—sometimes in our bedroom
, sometimes in the bathroom with my dirty underwear. Once, even my mother saw him.

My mother even had a talk with me about it, which I made up by saying I wasn't feeling well.
These changes were completely unexpected.

"Could he be becoming a pervert? He seems like he is,"

I asked Liu Tao for help. He told me not to worry, and even suggested that I intentionally or
unintentionally reveal our relationship to my husband. I began to realize that Liu Tao was brewing some kind of plan.

A pang of reluctance flashed through my mind, but in the end, I followed Liu Tao's advice and began to do
some to attract my husband's attention.

For example, I would chat with people late at night, and when I received a phone call, I would deliberately avoid my husband and go to another room to answer it
. I always carried my phone with me. I thought that even if my husband was stupid, he would notice these unusual behaviors.

"Have you been having some trouble lately? You've been talking on the phone with people all the time."

See, this is my useless husband. He's already prepared for his wife to cheat on him, but
he just doesn't dare to confront me directly. I must have been blind to marry such a useless man.

I told him in a very calm tone that nothing special had happened, that I was still the same as usual.
Judging from his expression, I knew he didn't believe me, but he still didn't dare to press me further.

I told Liu Tao about this, and we both laughed so hard we were doubled over. Should I add some
excitement for him? I've gone from passively to actively enjoying this game of tormenting my husband.

I started staying out all night. When my husband called, I hung up immediately. The next day when I got home, he asked about my
whereabouts . I gave him a flimsy excuse, and he was surprisingly patient, holding back his anger.

"Let's add some excitement for him," I thought. "I want to see how long he can endure this."

From then on, I no longer hid my flirting with Liu Tao from my husband. I could even find newly bought
condoms in my bag, which I had deliberately placed there. My husband's appearance had changed so much during that time that I hardly recognized him.

"I'm having an affair. You actually knew a long time ago, and you still have to ask me."

When my husband asked me for confirmation again, I nonchalantly told him the whole story. He buried his head in his hands and squatted on the floor,
not getting up for a long time.

"When did this happen? Why... why did you do this to me?"

He didn't scream hysterically as I had expected; he was only slightly agitated. I told him
everything about Liu Tao and me. He was silent. I gave him a disdainful look and went out to keep my appointment for that evening.

"Perhaps your husband will thank us in the end."

Candlelight dinner, champagne and roses—I took pictures of all of this and sent them to my husband, thus beginning his
complete transformation.

That night, when I got home, he was already in bed. After I got into bed, he stirred slightly, and I
realized he had been awake the whole time. In that instant, I was certain he wouldn't divorce me. All his reactions were exactly as
Liu Tao had predicted; in the end, he would fall in love with it all.

From then on, my relationship with Liu Tao was completely open to my husband. There was no longer any need to hide it.
Dating , flirting on the phone—he knew everything. His eyes changed from initial anger to increasing
calmness, until later, every time I called or dressed up to go out, he watched with the same eager anticipation as a viewer waiting for
the lottery .

"Honey, I think I don't have enough condoms in my bag. Could you go out and buy me a few?"

The unreasonable, excessive, even incomprehensible request of buying condoms for his wife's date with her mistress—which he used to make
—was now something I could openly ask my husband. After a moment's hesitation, he silently went out and bought me
condoms, stuffing them into my bag.

"This is the final stage."

Following Liu Tao's instructions, after our passionate encounter, I returned home around one or two in the morning. Entering
the room woke my husband; he seemed preoccupied and unable to sleep.

"Wash my underwear and stockings; I need them for tomorrow."

I took out the underwear and stockings, stained with the remnants of our passion, and
handed them to my husband. His hands were trembling; it wasn't anger, I could tell he was excited.

My husband didn't say a word, silently got up, put on his coat, and went to the bathroom to wash my underwear
and stockings—no, I should say, wash my underwear and stockings for Liu Tao and me that very night.

"Didn't you go to the bathroom to check? Maybe he wasn't just washing his underwear."

After listening to my account, Liu Tao asked a very intriguing question, which also
provided a solution for a deeper level of our game.

I can still remember the indescribable expression on my husband's face when he saw that condom. It
was the condom he had used right after Liu Tao and I had sex; it still contained the pungent smell of semen, and I don't know if it was
just my imagination, but it still felt a little warm to the touch.

My husband stared at the condom that I had used with someone else, his Adam's apple bobbing a few times, and then he almost
stumbled . As for what he did with the condom in the end, I had no interest in finding out;
judging from his current state, I knew I had achieved my goal.

What surprised me was how quickly he progressed. When he opened the package in front of me, took out the chastity
belt, and put it on in front of me, he had locked his little bird in a cage.

I smiled and asked, "Do you like wearing it?"

My husband couldn't have been more relaxed and happy at that moment: "Wife, you are my master. Please, please
give me even greater pleasure."

From that night on, the chastity belt was inseparable from my husband. He even wore it to bed, and he didn't take it off when he went to work or
out . Actually, I didn't instruct him to do any of this; it was entirely his own choice.

As a reward, I would occasionally bring back some souvenirs from my sexual encounters with Liu Tao for him to enjoy.
He examined our clothes, sex toys, and even the short videos we'd filmed, as if they were priceless treasures, looking at them over
and over again. Several times, he couldn't resist the urge to masturbate, but I glared at him and he stopped.

I don't know how addicted my husband was to this game, but I'd fallen in love with it.
Marrying him wasn't such a bad thing after all; it was the first time I'd felt this way.

"Squeak~"

At one in the morning, I returned home from the hotel. As soon as I opened
the door , kneeling before me as if he'd been waiting for a long time. He was completely naked, with a cold chastity belt around his genitals.
He bowed his head respectfully, holding a neat, white towel in both hands, and said, "Master, welcome back."

I knew we could never go back to a normal life, because we were about to begin a completely new experience.

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