【Yueyue】（03）Author: Demon(w1985jc)

Author: demon (w1985jc)
Word Count: 3613

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Chapter 3

As time went by and my longing accumulated, Yueyue became the person I missed most. I told my friend that
it's the kind of affection that's interactive, communicative, and where the other person has feelings of attachment that's hard to let go of. My friend
agreed . On some early summer evenings, when I got off the bus and walked home after work, thinking of
her living in the south of the city, I felt both sweet and sad. After disappearing for a while, she reappeared frequently, and we started chatting
often . I changed my online name to "Persistent for Yueyue," and she asked, "Does your online name refer to me?" I said, "Of course it's you.
" She said happily, like a little girl, "I'm so happy." I said, "What's there to be happy about? I can't give you
happiness." She said she was very content, and then asked me with genuine concern, "When you have a girlfriend, will I still
be able to see you whenever I want?" I promised, "Yes, I will." Actually, I had never even thought about having a girlfriend,
and the truth is, I never did.

July 17th, Beijing, overcast and rainy. Before the rain started at noon, I stood in the stairwell outside my company building. Across from
this Ziguang Building was the University of International Business and Economics, my dream school—so close, yet so far. I thought of
Weng Xiaomeng from CCTV; what was she doing in this city? Before leaving work, the rain
poured down. I went to SOGO Department Store in Xuanwumen, but Yueyue was off work. I forgot which day
we arranged to meet—was it after the 17th? Was it the 18th? I clearly remember that on the 17th, I was in the stairwell
thinking about the school across the street, thinking about Weng Xiaomeng at No. 11 Fuxing Road. Even more clearly, I remember July 19th,
my second meeting with Yueyue. Her workplace had moved from Parkson in Fuxingmen to SOGO in Xuanwumen.
Coincidentally , a girl I had liked during the summer after graduating from junior high and the month before my first year of high school also arrived in
Beijing that day. She asked me to pick her up, and I told her that Yueyue and I had also arranged to meet that day—what a coincidence! She asked, "What if we clash
if I invite you to dinner tonight?" I said I'd definitely go along with her. She sent a string of dots to express
her speechlessness. I thought, "Right now, you're just a friend, but she's the woman in my heart. Isn't it obvious who comes first and
who's more important? Why are you speechless?

" Saturday, July 19th, Beijing Railway Station. I picked up Zhou, who's 1.7 meters tall.
Her beautiful legs in her hot pants were dazzling in the summer sun. Although I don't like her anymore, I did like her once, and some
subtle feelings are still strange. I picked her up? She's a grown woman, she's been to
Beijing , she has relatives, why would I pick her up? The fact is, she asked me to pick her up, and I did.
Then I "handed" her over to her third uncle. Her uncle, like an idiot, took the suitcase I was pulling for her and
rudely asked, "Young man, where are you going?" I thought, "Are you fucking stupid?" Your niece asked me to pick her up
, and I kindly helped her pull her suitcase to your beat-up car. Instead of thanking me, you asked where I was going?
Like I was some nobody coming to your house for dinner. What a piece of trash. Later, Zhou explained to me that her uncle
mistook me for her ex-boyfriend, which is why he was so rude. I thought, forget it, what a ridiculous excuse. Whoever he mistook me for,
he shouldn't have treated me like that. Bad manners are bad manners, nothing more to say. What I was thinking was, even if you
didn't ask me to stay or drag me to your house for dinner, I wouldn't go. The person I like is waiting for me;
we already made plans to have dinner together tonight.

I cautiously arrived at Sogo Department Store, rolled up the Youth Digest, and held it tightly in my hand.
I looked towards the cosmetics counter and saw her earnestly introducing products to a customer. Her short, neat hair, focused eyes, and
slightly upturned upper lip were striking. We hadn't seen each other for three months, and her beauty was even more captivating than before, making my heart flutter.
I carefully walked past her, heading north, through the mall, and out the north gate to wait for her to finish work.

At 5:30, we exchanged messages on QQ: "I'm off work; I'll
be waiting for you at KFC near Xuanwumen subway station." Then, I gazed south, and a beautiful and capable woman in a dark yellow-green work uniform, black trousers, black
high , and short, glossy black hair that reached past her ears walked towards me…

After three months, we were finally face to face again. "Shall we go eat?" I forget who asked whom,
but the person asked agreed, and Yueyue and I went to her usual dinner restaurant. It was still light when we went in
. It was July, not even six o'clock in the evening, not even dusk. We entered the restaurant. I felt she
was as beautiful as when we first met in April, but different. Later, I realized what the difference was. We sat down, and she laughed, "Still
eating braised pork intestines?" From that teasing remark, I could tell how much she cared about me. She was so open and natural, while
I was the shy one, smiling awkwardly and saying, "No." What exactly did we order? I vaguely remember she ordered spicy blood curd, and as for
what I ordered, besides two bottles of beer, I really can't remember…

We chatted happily while eating dinner. Because she had to work that evening, we left the restaurant before
seven o'clock, before the sun had even set. She pretended, "Let's not see each other again, okay?" She crossed her arms
, emphasizing her ample breasts. I knew she was pretending; perhaps there was some reluctance to see each other again, but
more than that, it was a reluctance to part ways. I said, "We like each other and care about each other, why shouldn't we see each other again?" She
laughed and said, "I'm an impulsive person. What if we have a fight one day and I come looking for you?" Her smile
was particularly charming and alluring, making my heart itch, but I spread my hands and pretended to be calm, saying, "I can resist!"
She laughed, "But I can't resist. There's a Home Inn right across the street." At that moment, I wished I could grab her hand and go to
a Home Inn to book a room and have sex. Jokingly, we went back to the mall together. The counter was on the first floor, and the restroom
was level. She wanted me to go with her. When we went up the escalator, I tried to hold her hand, but she refused, saying, "I'm
wearing a uniform. People can tell at a glance that I'm a staff member here." I had no choice but to let go and stand next to her as
we went down to the restroom door to wait for her. After we left, we went back to the cosmetics counter. She asked me to sit
opposite her, in the usual customer seating area. She went behind the counter, picked up a bottle of hand cream,
and gently spread it evenly on the back of my hand with a brush. Then she held my right hand in both of hers, gently stroking and kneading it. She smiled the whole time, acting
so naturally. I was "worried" for her—how would she explain our relationship to her colleagues? A female
colleague asked her in a teasing tone, "Who's this?" She laughed and replied, "My little lover. Do you believe me?"
I didn't look up at them; at that moment, they really did look more like "female hooligans," while my obedient demeanor made me look like a "
victim ."

I spread hand cream evenly on the backs and palms of my hands, sensing that this brief reunion was coming to an end. A little reluctantly, I
whispered to her, "Do I have to leave?" Her voice was long and melancholic: "Yes."
Just as reluctant as our first parting at the bus stop, I walked out of the mall. It was already dark.
When would we meet again?

The boring work continued. One day, I was chatting with Yueyue on QQ on the 419 bus. I remembered a
photo of Weng Xiaomeng where a hint of lace was visible, and I asked, "What did your wedding photos look like?" She said with rare confidence, "
Very beautiful." I remembered when we first met in March, she sent me two
photos of herself in her early twenties in a military dormitory. One was a green military uniform with a military green skirt; the other, she wore a bright red shirt, like a
beautiful bride. Later, every time I thought of those two photos, I regretted not saving them.

One evening, around the time she left her job, we chatted. She told me the origin of her online name, Yueyue.
When she was 20, she got pregnant while with her first love. Afraid to tell her family, she went to the hospital for an abortion and
gave herself the pseudonym Li Yue. She said no one knew about this, and no one knew the name Yueyue.
One night, probably after I quit that boring job, I called her in my neighborhood. She calmly
and coldly said she would leave one day. She said she was my emotional support now, and once I was independent and
no longer needed her, she would disappear. Hearing her voice, I thought of Weng Xiaomeng's face, not because Xiaomeng
was prettier, but because, as Zhao Chen said, in my heart, Weng Xiaomeng and Yueyue were probably the same person. I
couldn't help but cry, pouring out my feelings and venting into the phone, letting her know how much I cared for her, telling
her I couldn't live without her. She remained unmoved, even though her heart wasn't calm. That was the first time I
cried because of a woman, in the summer of 2009, my 24th year of the Chinese zodiac. What started as a casual hookup blossomed into love.

On July 30th, without telling her beforehand, I went straight to the KFC near Xuanwumen subway station. I
told her on QQ that I was at KFC. Actually, I just missed her, so I wanted to be closer to her, just like when I went to
Dalian at the end of last year, I just wanted to be closer to the person I liked last winter. I had a basketball newspaper in hand and ordered a box of egg tarts and
a chestnut chicken burger, which was popular back then. After finishing the burger and a few egg tarts, I looked down at the newspaper when
the chair was quickly pulled away. I was stunned. Who was so rude and
barbaric? There was someone sitting across from me, and they came to sit down without saying anything, why were they so aggressive? I looked up and saw Yueyue. She smiled and sat down, picking up an egg tart and eating it. My heart
blossomed. "Aren't you at work?" I asked her. "A colleague will get one for me," she said. I said, "
Then I'll go buy you a burger." She nodded, and I got up to go to the counter, passing by her. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of her fair, tender
cleavage at the neckline of her dark yellow-green work uniform. Suddenly, I felt jealous and couldn't understand her husband. "You have
such a voluptuous and beautiful body every day, why aren't you satisfied? Why don't you cherish it?" I thought. "You don't love her, but Lao Wang loves her for you."
I bought my hamburger and sat back down opposite her, quietly watching her eat. Since it was during work hours, she didn't stay long. After
finishing her meal, we chatted briefly. A waiter passed by and told her to clear her things, even taking it upon himself to have the staff clear away the newspapers
on the table . I thought, "How did you know those were things I didn't want?"

As we walked out the west gate, we said goodbye. I wanted to hug her, and she gently leaned against my chest. I
reached out embraced her, and in my flustered state, I vaguely felt a light kiss on the nape of my neck, but it was gone before I could even fully feel it.
My embrace didn't loosen, but she broke free, turned, and walked south with a confident stride, swinging her arms. Her
black high heels and her beautiful silhouette slowly disappeared into the lonely night.

I got home before 8:30, and she wouldn't get off work until 10. We continued chatting online, and she said, "I haven't been pampered like this
in a long time ." Around that time, I happened to hear Jacky Cheung's "All the Way With You," and I felt it
was perfect for us. When she got off work, she told me, "I really want something to happen between us." I was
happy , but I didn't know how to respond. After she got into a taxi and told me, I felt a sense of peace. I said goodnight,
and she went home to her man.

Our relationship reached an unprecedented level of intimacy at the end of July, but then she started avoiding me again,
rarely and refusing to see me anymore. After losing my job, I didn't look for another one. My reason at the time was to focus on preparing for
the exam in October. Looking back now, I realize that I wasted too much time on that boring self-study exam.

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