The bitter consequences of casual sex

Having lived for over thirty years, I often lament to friends that I've never successfully hooked up with a woman. It's true; I'm naturally quiet and not very sociable. I often feel inferior in front of women I like, too ashamed to say a word to them. Fortunately, God blessed me with a beautiful and charming wife and a smart and handsome son. I should be quite content with this life, but my heart has always been restless. I feel I haven't experienced enough women, and I always have inappropriate thoughts about the beautiful women I see. Unfortunately, I lack the talent for flirting and haven't received any attention from any women, even though I've downloaded various dating apps.
Life often takes unexpected turns. I'm an engineer with a design background. Around May 10th, I went on a business trip to inspect construction sites in another city, and afterwards, I took the high-speed train back to Chengdu. At the station, I naturally couldn't resist stealing glances at the beautiful women around me. Suddenly, my eyes lit up; I saw a beautiful woman with a great figure and气质 (qi zhi - a combination of temperament, bearing, and presence). Although I couldn't see her face under a mask, her eyes were large and bright. The seat opposite the beautiful woman was empty, so I sat down there, pretending to look at my phone while stealing glances every now and then. She seemed to sense my presence, looking up and meeting my gaze a few times, which made me flustered. Soon it was time to board, and I didn't dare ask for her contact information or say a word. I shook my head and had my ticket checked.
Life is so dramatic. I was in seat F, and after sitting down, I wondered if another beautiful woman would sit next to me. While I was pondering this, I saw a familiar figure in front of me, looking for a seat. I thought to myself, "I hope she sits next to me." Slowly, the beautiful woman walked over and stopped beside me. She clearly recognized me, but didn't say anything. She was carrying a small, seemingly heavy suitcase, and out of politeness, I helped her put it on the luggage rack. She whispered a thank you and sat down to play on her phone. I sat down too, but I still couldn't help glancing at her every now and then. She was wearing a knee-length black skirt, and the faint scent of perfume wafted over me. My mind was wandering. "Didn't you get enough of looking at me while waiting for the train?" her voice came, but there was no anger or annoyance. My thoughts had been exposed, and my face flushed slightly. But at least it broke the ice. I tried to be humorous and told her that guys like us are all like this when we see a pretty girl. But she didn't laugh… We ended up saying some pointless things, and the conversation was about to die. When we talked about our professions, I discovered she was a designer! What a stroke of luck! I, Xiao Lang, started as a designer and then went into engineering. We started chatting about interesting things in the industry, my feelings after switching to engineering, and we immediately started talking. We even added each other on WeChat. During our chat, I learned that we were in the same industry, both in Chengdu on business trips, she was 28, divorced, no children, and had a rich dating history (I said my dating history was blank, and she laughed at me), etc. It was the first time I'd talked so much with a complete stranger.
A few hours passed quickly, and we became friends. It was already past 8 pm when we got off the train, so we went out for hot pot. We each had a couple of bowls of spicy hot pot, and since neither of us can hold our liquor very well, we were both a little tipsy by dinner. She said she was going to stay at a hotel for the night, and I blurted out, "My wife and son are staying at her friend's place because I'm away on a business trip. You can stay at my place for the night; I have a few vacant rooms." She neither agreed nor disagreed, so I took her suitcase and we walked together, with her following behind. When we got home, I got her some pajamas, settled her into the room, and then went to take a shower. I had a feeling something might happen, but I didn't dare act on it. I masturbated while showering, thinking that releasing my pent-up desire would make me think less, and even if we did have sex, it would last longer than usual. After showering, she was still awake. I got her some ice cream and one for her too. I turned to close the door and leave the room, but she grabbed my hand. Suddenly, my desire was reignited, and I didn't hold back anymore. We kissed, caressed, did 69, woman on top, doggy style… It turns out that masturbation definitely makes it last longer. What usually lasts seven or eight minutes, this time it went almost half an hour. We were sweating, and we didn't say a word afterward. The ice cream melted all over the floor. Then I put on my pajamas and prepared to go to sleep. Suddenly, a loud "Wow!" startled us. Our four-year-old son jumped out of the door. "Were you scared, Dad? Mom said we'd sneak back for a surprise! Who's this auntie...?" I couldn't answer. I turned and saw my wife's surprised, bewildered, angry, and complicated gaze. Tears streamed down her face. "Son, come with Mom," she said, without looking back, carrying our son out the door. My wife and I were still stunned. Countless consequences flashed through my mind. Deep down, I love and fear my wife, but I didn't have the face to chase after her... My
wife still hasn't come home. She's blocked my phone and WeChat. Relatives, parents, and friends all blame me. I finally understand what it feels like to be abandoned by everyone. I don't know what the outcome will be. Knowing my wife as I do, divorce might be the final result. I can't bear to part with my wife and son. Recalling the beautiful times we've shared makes my heart ache. I can't let go, I don't want to let go. If we divorce, the house, car, and stocks will all go to them. I'll leave with nothing. Perhaps this is the last thing I can say to my conscience.

[The End]

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