Wife in the diary

January 3rd

. Today is sunny. The sun hangs bright and dazzling in the sky. The breeze that brushes my face is no longer icy; the warm spring has arrived. Small white flowers are blooming on the branches of the pomegranate tree in the yard.

Although the season is getting warmer day by day, I feel my body aging rapidly. I'm only in my early fifties, yet I often feel exhausted. This is because of my years of working day and night. Now, although I have money, I've lost my health, and I only realized my regret after losing it. Even when I'm not doing anything, I tire easily, and I feel drowsy sitting down. Sometimes I unconsciously doze off, drooling.

I went to see Dr. Liao at the hospital. He asked about my condition and gave me a comprehensive examination. As expected, I have several chronic illnesses. He advised me to pay attention to rest and take good care of my health. Dr. Liao and I have been friends for many years, and before we parted, he specifically advised me to minimize sexual activity, the less the better.

I said, "What, is it that serious?"

Dr. Liao said, "You're getting old, and your blood pressure is high. Don't do strenuous exercise." I felt he had something he was hesitant to say. He knew my wife was young, in the prime of her sexual life, with a strong libido.

I also knew my physical functions were declining significantly, but I didn't feel it was that serious.

Besides, I had plenty of time to want it. Rather than live a sexless and unsatisfying life, I'd rather die a stimulating death. My only pain was that I wasn't a normal man anymore.

Since last year, I'd started to lose my strength. Facing my wife's vibrant body lying on the bed, I was willing but unable to get an erection. This was undoubtedly a huge blow to someone as strong-willed as me. In the battle with my wife's heightened sexual desire, my body gave in first. I had to face the cruel reality. This caused me great pain.

In desperation, I began to hint to her that I could tolerate her having other men. But she couldn't go behind my back; this man should be someone I approved of. I didn't want any trouble or accidents. Once this thought appeared, it grew wildly like a seed sprouting.

In reality, the relationship between men and women is unequal. Women are like containers. In sexual relations, men give more, women less. On the surface, it seems men possess and use women's bodies, while women use their bodies to satisfy men. However, in actual sexual intercourse, women often experience more pleasure. It's like using a stick to clean your ear—is the stick more comfortable, or the ear?

I started imagining what other men and their wives would be like, how my wife would feel, what her expression would be. When I said this to her, most of the time she pretended not to hear. Sometimes she would criticize me. I would try to convince her how much I love her, and that because I love her, I want her to enjoy the love of more men.

My attempts were completely ineffective; she remained silent and refused to agree. So I accepted the fact that I might have a loyal wife in this life, and she might not have other men. Shouldn't this be the happiest thing for a man? But I feel no joy at all.

I've always had the habit of writing a diary, filling over a dozen notebooks in the past decade. The content is quite bland, mostly just reading notes, anecdotes, and other trivial things. Starting today, I will record my life and my uncontrollable sexual desire for my wife in my diary.

On January 5th,

after my husband went to the hospital for a checkup, he locked himself in his study on the second floor. When I came in, I asked him what the doctor said, and he just said there was nothing seriously wrong. I hope so, but why is he in such a bad mood?

At noon, I made some of his favorite dishes: braised pork and steamed sea bass. He ate it all up. In the afternoon, the nanny said the kitchen drain was clogged, so I called someone to unclog it. Also, the pet store called to say the dog needed its vaccination. I plan to go tomorrow. Nothing urgent.

Oh, and there's one more thing I think I should write down. Today, I accidentally saw my husband's diary. This makes me very embarrassed; I absolutely did not mean to. I have never liked other people's privacy; it's immoral.

Especially for my husband, who is a very important person and respected by many people, including myself.

I will clean my husband's study every day. I know he writes in his diary every day because sometimes he takes it out and writes about what he did that day. So a diary is still quite useful; as time passes, many things are forgotten. From that day on, I also started writing a diary.

Of course, I would hide it very carefully, not letting anyone find it, especially my husband. Because I would write things about my dissatisfaction with him. Especially in terms of sex, he was becoming increasingly impotent, which made me feel terrible. Maybe my parents were right; marrying him was a huge mistake. After all, he was old while I was still young. He was also helpless, saying that I could find another man outside to satisfy myself, and he said this more than once. I didn't believe a word he said. Men always indulge in debauchery themselves, yet expect their wives to remain chaste. No man wants his wife to have an affair. He knew I was dissatisfied, so he deliberately tested me. He was insidiously trying to set a trap for me, but I wouldn't fall for it.

I didn't speak ill of him because I hated him, but because I believed that if I wrote my dissatisfaction in my diary, I wouldn't hold a grudge against him anymore. My upbringing made me unable to accept vicious and crude words. Because I still loved him in my heart, even though he was no longer a complete man. He was still maintaining the family's livelihood.

What's strange today is that while wiping the table, I noticed one of my diaries was missing from the bookcase. I remember there were twelve, but now there are only eleven. The most recently written one is gone. My husband has never suspected me of reading his diaries because he doesn't lock the bookcase. The only thing he locks is his desk drawer, where his documents are kept. He knows I'm a very observant person and might notice the missing diary. Was he doing it on purpose? Why did he hide it? Where did he hide it? What did he write in it? I can't help but be curious. On

January 14th

, I took my medication, but I didn't feel well.

That evening, my wife came out of the bathroom wearing only a bathrobe, revealing her full, soft breasts underneath. It's February now, and it's still a bit chilly outside, but the house is pleasantly warm because of the heating. My wife

sat next to me on the sofa, and I sensed she was restless; she was probably aroused, and it was clear she needed a man's comfort at that moment.

When my wife took off her bathrobe and lay between my legs, her full, snow-white breasts exposed, I felt she was already soaking wet. But I was too weak to penetrate her. She moaned softly, trying to caress me, but no matter what she did, I couldn't get in. Until she rolled off me. I said apologetically, "Liping...no, you should go find someone outside..." She remained silent, turned, and lay down on her own bed.

I genuinely wanted her to accept love. She probably couldn't believe it. My condition was getting worse and worse; I couldn't satisfy her anymore. And she desperately needed sexual satisfaction. She needed release, she needed a normal man.

Ideally, a man she liked, but such men were hard to find. Perhaps marrying an old man like me was a mistake. She must regret it now. It's not my fault.

I have a wild past; I spent a long time indulging in debauchery, frequenting nightclubs and entertainment venues.

January 16th

, this afternoon I drank a lot. I haven't drunk like this in a long time. I expected A-Jian to be a good drinker, but what was surprising was that Li-Ping also tried red wine for the first time.

A-Jian is a teacher at the school, and his mentor is a friend of mine. He's in his early twenties, in the prime of his life.

His handsome face is very masculine, and his eyes are bright. I think he has a lot of charisma. I've met him more than once.

Last year, he came to see me, hoping I could help him secure a collaborative research project. I readily agreed. After it was done, A-Jian came to my door to give me a calligraphy piece. It was by a famous calligrapher from our province, one of my favorites. This left a deep impression on me; he was not only handsome but also very intelligent.

Since then, I've had the idea that he and Yu-Zhen could become a couple.

Today, I specially invited A-Jian to my home. I sensed an unusual enthusiasm from my wife for A-Jian, though my feeling might be wrong, just my foolish jealousy at play. She usually doesn't like to entertain guests, but today was an exception. She proactively toasted A-Jian, displaying the typical hospitality of a hostess.

I felt a rare pang of jealousy, or even envy. But isn't this what I've always dreamed of?

Yuzhen leaned close to my ear and whispered, "Dad, don't you think Mom's especially excited today?" I replied, "Wouldn't Mom be neglecting her guests if she wasn't enthusiastic?" Yuzhen said, "Dad, you're so generous."

I felt Yuzhen was jealous; it was probably because Ajian was more enthusiastic towards his wife than towards her. This wasn't surprising; a wealthy older man remarrying would often choose a younger, more beautiful woman. But I preferred women with fair skin, a full figure, and large, round breasts. Such women could arouse my sexual desire. And Liping was such a woman—full-figured and well-endowed.

I observed carefully, but I couldn't tell whether Ajian liked his wife or Yuzhen. He toasted his wife, perhaps trying to get closer to Yuzhen through her. And his wife's enthusiasm towards him might be for Yuzhen's sake. Only they could know what they were really thinking, and ironically, even if you asked them now, how could you believe their answers? However, from my perspective, I would choose my wife, even though she was older, because she was more mature.

My wife got drunk. That night, she lay with her back to me, sleeping soundly. Thinking of A-Jian filled me with jealousy. And jealousy fueled my lust, making me incredibly aroused. Tonight, I became the powerful man capable of conquering her.

I caressed my wife's smooth back, sliding down to her waist and hips, where her full, rounded buttocks quickly expanded. My hands slipped between her legs, roaming freely. My wife's breathing softened, becoming more viscous, and her nightgown fell completely to the floor, her snow-white body naked. As my hands rubbed her, I found myself hard. I felt her struggling. In her arousal, I vaguely heard her whisper a name, "A-Jian!" Li-Ping then collapsed and fell asleep, seemingly still dreaming.

She uttered "A-Jian" in her sleep at that moment. Although it was only once, and very, very softly, I heard it exceptionally clearly. Was it real sleep talking? Or was she pretending, deliberately letting me hear? I didn't understand. Was she dreaming of being with A-Jian? Or was she just pretending to have this dream to convey her inner thoughts of "how wonderful it would be to be like this with A-Jian"? Was she trying to say, "Since you told me to find a man, then find A-Jian?"

I understand now; A-Jian's existence is very useful. He successfully restored my function today.

And I hope my wife understands that jealousy can successfully excite me. I'm not too worried that my wife and A-Jian will cross the line. That would require a lot of courage. I don't think my wife would dare to cross that boundary. As long as my wife doesn't cross the line, then this game has a reason to continue. And I can get more pleasure from this game.

On January 17th

, I lay in bed, my head aching. In my dream, I vaguely felt my body reach the peak of extreme pain and pleasure. I felt that it wasn't my husband pressing down on me, but A-Jian… Now that I think about it, my husband and I weren't real before; now we are real. It was A-Jian who made me feel this… This feeling is completely different from my husband's. I reached out and tightly grabbed A-Jian's young arm; I was pressed under his chest. I think A-Jian's muscles are very elastic, and... writing these words is really embarrassing... Anyway, my husband will never see this diary, so I'll just write it down truthfully.

Actually, it was my husband on top of me, and I mistook him for A-Jian. If that's the case, the fullness of the whole process... the completely different strength compared to my husband, still amazes me... Was the A-Jian I saw in my dream the real A-Jian? From A-Jian's usual clothes, I can roughly tell his physique, but I've never seen him before. Is the A-Jian in my dream the same as the A-Jian in reality? I want to see the real A-Jian, not just in my dream... On January 20th,

I found a key in the pot of an orchid next to his desk. I've never seen such a short key before. The key was placed in the water tray, clearly intentionally placed there. Why did he put a key there? He knows I'll water the plant, and I'll always find this key. Did he want me to see it? My intuition tells me this key is related to the diary.

I couldn't help but use the key to open his desk drawer, and the diary was placed in the most conspicuous position in the drawer.

Black leather, the cover has a picture of a ship. I suppressed my curiosity and didn't open it.

I wanted to know why he had given me the key. If he wanted me to see the diary, what was written there—his own thoughts, or what he wanted me to see? If he wanted me to see it, could it be a trap? Rather than wondering what he was thinking, it was best not to look. A few days before

January 22nd , I looked at her photos while my wife was asleep. She was beautiful, very voluptuous. Her fair skin glowed alluringly under the flash. I casually manipulated her body, posing her in various positions. This excited me immensely. I looked through the photos on my laptop; her body was full of… to be precise. Although it wasn't very respectful to her, it was the truth. Her body was unique; even after ten years of marriage, her vagina was still very tight, truly exquisite. It could give a man a strong sense of being enveloped, like being tightly held in a woman's mouth—this wasn't an exaggeration, but a fact. When a man entered, while feeling the tight embrace, the full flesh inside would constantly rub against him. This gave the man intense pleasure. The only drawback was that men had difficulty lasting longer. She herself was completely unaware of these physical wonders, because they were something only men could discover. Fortunately, she didn't know she possessed such qualities; otherwise, she would easily seduce men, and her promiscuity would be unimaginable. She was incredibly alluring in the photos, her large breasts standing erect like mountain peaks, her full buttocks bulging, and a deep, hidden opening in her valley. I admired these obscene photos alone in my study. I suddenly wondered what would happen if Ah Jian saw them… During lunch break, Ah Jian came to ask Yu Zhen to go to the movies. I called Ah Jian into the study. I said, "I took some artistic photos, I'll send them to your email later. Could you please print them for me?" Ah Jian readily agreed, saying, "No problem. When do you need them, and what size?" I said, "Seven inches or five inches are fine, you can bring them over this weekend. Come over for dinner while you're at it." Ah Jian said, "Okay, no problem." As he got up to leave, I said, "It's best if no one else sees them, just you, understand?" Ah Jian was surprised and said, "Didn't you say they were artistic photos?" I said, "Oh, they are artistic... but... they're Li Ping's..." Ah Jian said, "I understand, I'll print them myself, don't worry." When Ah Jian and Yu Zhen got up to leave to go see a movie, my wife said she wanted to go with them too. At first, I felt it was inappropriate and said, "Do you really have to go?" My wife said, "I'd rather go with them, after all, they're young, I'm a little worried about them." I understood from my wife's expression. I said, "As long as A-Jian doesn't object." A-Jian seemed very happy and said, "Of course it's good for Sister Li-Ping to go." After he finished speaking, he looked at Li-Ping, and when Li-Ping met his gaze, I felt an ambiguous atmosphere in the air.

I wondered why A-Jian would object. Judging from his expression, he was eager for his wife to go to the movies too. Perhaps she had already hinted at it when I wasn't looking. If so, I couldn't object even more. I've been taking the medicine Dr. Liao prescribed

since February 1st

, and I feel much better lately, my mind is gradually clearing. I've been reading in my study since breakfast. Although the book is open and placed in the middle of my desk, I can't concentrate on a single word. I opened my laptop and browsed the news, just looking at the headlines, not really caring about the content. I guess I'm a bit detached from worldly affairs now. I was thinking about my wife.

Around ten o'clock, my wife came back from outside, saying she had gone to the movies with A-Jian and Yu-Zhen. She seemed very excited, in a good mood. She was wearing a black wool coat and a skirt with flesh-colored leggings. I asked, "Aren't your legs cold?" She laughed and said, "This is thick."

What interested me wasn't what she was wearing, but why she suddenly liked wearing such clothes. This was so different from her usual conservative self. Was it because of A-Jian? If it's because of him, of course I'd be happy to see it happen. My husband went out in the morning on

February 3rd , saying he was going to see an old friend. He wouldn't be back by noon. I felt he was just making an excuse, because he hasn't liked going out lately. He's made excuses to avoid friends inviting him out several times. Now I'm home alone. I finally opened my husband's desk. I took the diary out of the drawer and placed it on the table. The handwriting was very small; I didn't read a single word. Just as I closed the diary, a photograph slipped to the floor. I picked it up and was immediately shocked. It was an obscene photograph of a woman. A woman lying on her back, asleep, arms outstretched, right leg straight, left leg bent. This woman was me. Why did he take such a photograph? What was he trying to do? I couldn't imagine what he was thinking. I didn't understand why my husband took such a photograph. But I must admit, it was very alluring. That's the only part I can accept. At four o'clock in the afternoon on February 5th , A-Jian came. I've taken more photos these past two days. I haven't decided whether to give them to Wang Yong to develop. He's already seen my wife's body; he couldn't possibly have taken it from anyone else. He'd only seen parts of his wife's body, and even then, not clearly, let alone examined the provocative poses from various angles. So, would giving him the photos to develop be too stimulating for him? If I gave him my wife's nude photos, would he think I was implying he could seduce her? If he only developed the photos, that would be fine, but what if he crossed that line? In that case, I would be the one causing my wife's infidelity, not him. Besides, what would my wife think if she saw these photos? She would definitely be angry that her husband had taken the photos without her knowledge and given them to someone else to develop—perhaps she'd pretend to be angry. Then, she might think that since Ah Jian had seen her nude photos—and that her husband had deliberately shown them to him—it meant he had tacitly approved of her physical infidelity. I would also be consumed by jealousy. For that thrill of jealousy, I should take the risk. After making the decision, I quietly told A-Jian, "I sent some new photos of your sister Li-Ping to your email. Develop them, but don't let anyone know. Do it alone. Pick out some interesting ones and enlarge them for me." A-Jian was excited, but tried his best to appear calm, saying "Okay," and then took his leave. At 5 PM on February 6th , A-Jian arrived. My wife was already up and in the living room. A-Jian said, "I'll leave in a little while." I tried to persuade him to stay, saying, "Don't leave today, drink with me." My wife, listening nearby, smiled naturally. A-Jian only said this verbally, without any intention of leaving. A-Jian wouldn't know what happened in our bedroom after he left that night. Of course, he couldn't know that he himself appeared in Li-Ping's dream and made her intoxicated. But why did he show an expression on his face that seemed to want to get Li-Ping drunk? The three of us started drinking. Yu-Zhen seemed annoyed, quickly finished her meal, and left the table. Tonight, my wife got drunk. Yuzhen didn't want to get involved, and Ajian helped for a while before going home. That night, my actions were exactly the same as before. Strangely, my wife's sleep-talking was the same… she called out "Ajian" again tonight. Could it be that she had the same dream tonight? …Was all of this something she deliberately planned? …Was she trying to experience pleasure again in this way? On the afternoon of February 10th , Yuzhen came home. She found me with a serious expression. She said, "I need to tell you something." I said, "What is it?" Yuzhen said, "I saw some photos." I said, "What photos? I don't understand." "I didn't go to Dad, I came to you." She said she saw a book in Ajian's room with photos tucked inside. "Who took these photos? Was it Ajian? Why did you let him take these photos?" Yuzhen was almost in tears. I already understood. But how could I explain it to her? I thought and thought, and said to her, "You might not believe it, but these photos were taken by Dad. He asked A-Jian to develop them. Why did he do this? I think he just thought they were artistic photos." Yu-Zhen said, "So you're saying Dad did it, and Mom has nothing to do with it? But why did Dad do this?" I said, "You'll have to ask him. But you know he's not in good health. He didn't expect you to find out, he didn't expect A-Jian to keep the photos." Yu-Zhen said, "But why did Dad do this? It puts A-Jian in a difficult position." I said, "Maybe Dad thinks Mom's body is very beautiful, and he wants other men to see it too. That's a bit much. But you have to believe me, A-Jian and I are innocent." Yu-Zhen said, "I don't understand what Dad is trying to do. Doesn't he see how A-Jian looks at Mom? Doesn't he know what he's thinking?" Yu-Zhen said a lot more. For example, why did A-Jian put the photos in the book? Why did he let her see them? Was he implying that she was playing matchmaker? She had a lot of complaints about A-Jian. February 12th. I've been feeling great these past few days. Yu-Zhen came home to see me. She's been renting a place outside for a week now. I'm curious about how she's doing living alone. I tentatively asked her what she eats every day. She seemed puzzled and said, "Dad, is that all you care about?" I said, "Actually, I don't know either, I don't want to ask you. How are things between you and Wang Jian?" That was what I really wanted to ask. Yuzhen looked strange and said, "We're already together. Dad, are you curious?" Then Yuzhen, in a fit of pique, told me about what happened between Wang Jian and her, how strong he was in that area, and so on. I could only remain silent. I don't know if what she said was true; maybe she was just saying it on purpose. But I guess she's fallen in love with Wang Jian. March 9th. Something happened today. My husband found my diary. I hid it under a pile of old magazines, but he still found it. I'll have to be more careful from now on. What if my husband finds my diary? I'll have to find a new hiding place. It's such a small place; it's hard to hide it anywhere without it being discovered. The only way is to try not to go out when my husband is home.

A few days ago, A-Jian asked me if I wanted to go to the movies. I really wanted to, but I needed to come up with a plan… How could I hide my diary properly? I racked my brains. At least I needed to find out if my husband had secretly read my diary while I wasn't home. I decided to make a mark in the diary, a mark that only I would understand, and that he wouldn't notice. Last night,

March 12th

, I heard my wife call out "A-Jian's" name in her sleep. She did it on purpose for me to hear.

So, what was her purpose in doing this? Was it to deliberately provoke my jealousy?

Yu-Zhen told me again today that she disliked A-Jian and didn't want to see him. But I don't believe her. Maybe she's just pretending to dislike him, and that's the opposite in her heart? When A-Jian came to my house

on March 12th,

he also called Yu-Zhen, so a little while later, Yu-Zhen also came to call me to go together. Her expression seemed to say, "I didn't want to go with you, but it's inconvenient for just the two of you. I'm going reluctantly." A-Jian said, "If we don't go early on Sunday, we won't be able to get tickets."

My husband persuaded me, "I'll stay home today, you go. Haven't you always said you wanted to see a movie?" I knew why my husband was doing this. So the three of us went out together. The movie started at 10:30 and ended a little after 1:00 PM. I invited them to my house for lunch, but they both went back to their own places.

After I got home, he went for a walk and didn't return until evening.

As soon as my husband left, I immediately took out my diary. Even with a magnifying glass, I could see tiny tear marks. I could confirm that my husband had been secretly reading my diary. So, should I continue writing in this diary? Or should I stop?

I started writing in this diary precisely because I didn't want others to understand my inner thoughts; I only wanted to write for myself. Now that I know someone else has read it, I shouldn't continue. However, the person reading my diary is, after all, my husband. At least outwardly, we absolutely don't read each other's diaries, so I should probably continue writing. In other words, I can use this method to indirectly communicate with my husband from now on. Things I can't say face-to-face, I can say through my diary. I just hope my husband will just read it and not admit it.

Also, I don't care what my husband does, I want him to believe that I would never secretly read his diary. I'm a proper woman. I know where my husband's diary is, and I've even picked it up and flipped through it occasionally, but I haven't read a single word… March 19th.

I guessed right, my wife is writing in her diary. I deliberately didn't mention it in the diary; actually, I noticed it a few days ago. A couple of days ago, when I went downstairs to use the bathroom, I saw my wife writing something at the dining table as I passed through the living room. Today, while she was out watching a movie, I looked around the living room and found it easily.

March 25th.

For a long time, I've been exhausted from dealing with my wife's strong desires, and my energy is depleted. Now I always feel lacking in that area. Since the beginning of this year, I've learned to use Ah Jian as a stimulus; what allows me to maintain my high energy is the accelerated sexual impulse fueled by jealousy towards Ah Jian.

On April 2nd

, without my husband's presence, Ah Jian and I had already met three times.

Last time, Yuzhen left while we were drinking. But no matter how drunk I got, I held firm to my last line of defense. I still don't have the courage to cross it, and I believe Ajian feels the same way.

I've talked to Ajian about everything that happened, including why I asked him to develop the photos. Ajian said he felt that the teacher made him develop Liping's photos to stimulate me, to excite me, to torment me, and to give him pleasure from it. Not only that, he also knew that Liping had noticed my feelings, that she was in the same pain as me, and that he was also enjoying it.

I told Ajian that Yuzhen found my photos in the book she borrowed from him. She said they weren't just randomly placed there, that there was probably another purpose, is that right?

Ajian said he specifically wanted the prostitutes to see them so that they would do something for us.

I said this is the first time I've talked to you alone like this. My husband and I have never talked like this. My husband has never questioned our relationship, and I think he still believes in my chastity. I also want to believe in my chastity, and my chastity can still be believed, right? Only you—Ajian—can answer this question.

Ah Jian said, "Please believe me. Although I've touched every part of Sister Liping's body, I haven't penetrated her yet. I understand what you mean, teacher. You want me to get close to Sister Liping, but not to cross that final line. Of course, I will keep that promise." He continued, "I said, 'If you say that, then I'm relieved. It's so kind of you to help me maintain my chastity. In such an intimate situation, it's truly remarkable that you've kept my chastity.' Ah Jian said I hate my husband, but actually, I feel both hatred and love for him; the more I hate him, the more I love him. He can't ignite his passion unless he puts you in the middle and causes you so much pain. If all of this is for my pleasure, then I can't betray him even more." On the evening

of April 2nd

, she returned home. She was indescribably beautiful. Initially, I allowed Ah Jian to have contact with my wife only at intervals, but as he gradually became accustomed to the stimulation, I felt unsatisfied, so I gradually shortened the intervals between their contact.

The shorter the intervals, the stronger the jealousy; the stronger the jealousy, the greater the pleasure I derived, leading me to my ultimate goal. This was my wife's wish, and also my wish, so it continued unrestrainedly.

What to do next? How can I further ignite their passion? Continuing like this will no longer be exciting enough.

I have already put them both in a situation akin to adultery. But I still firmly believe in my wife. Is there any other way that won't damage my wife's chastity, yet will allow them to... What's a good way to get closer? Although I'm thinking about it, they might come up with a better plan before I do, including Yuzhen… As I said, my wife is a cunning woman, and I'm an even more treacherous man. It's no surprise that Yuzhen, born of a treacherous man and woman, is a treacherous daughter. However, even more treacherous than the three of us is Ajian. It's easy to imagine what will happen when these four treacherous people get together. And the rarest thing is that these four treacherous people are deceiving each other while working together towards a common goal.

That is to say, although each of them harbors their own ulterior motives, they all share the same goal: to corrupt my wife as much as possible and to strive desperately in that direction. On the afternoon

of April 3rd

, Yuzhen came to find me to go out. We met up with Ajian at the park bus stop, and the three of us went to visit Xishan. This was Yuzhen's suggestion; it was rare for her to think of such a thing. School was on holiday, so Ajian had some free time. We strolled along the riverbank, then rented a small boat and headed towards Xishan. After resting near the bridge, we explored Xishan. It had been a long time since I'd breathed in the fresh mountain air; I should come more often. My husband has only ever focused on studying since he was young and rarely takes me to places like this. We headed back in the evening, and after getting off the bus, the three of us went our separate ways. We had a great time today… April 4th. Last night, we… The couple went to sleep without drinking. In the middle of the night, I deliberately stuck my left leg out of the covers. My husband immediately noticed and crawled into my bed. Although we weren't drunk, we successfully had sex under the bright light – a first for him. This miracle excited him immensely… My landlady and my husband are both on vacation now, staying home all day. My husband goes out for an hour or two each day for walks in the neighborhood. While he says he's going for a walk, another purpose is to give me a chance to peek at his diary. When my husband says, "I'm going out for a walk," it means to me, "Take this opportunity to read my diary." The more he says this, the less I want to read it. However, I should create opportunities for my husband to peek at my diary… April 6th: My wife gave me a surprise last night. She didn't drink, didn't ask me to turn off the lights, and actively teased and encouraged me in various ways. I never expected her to suddenly learn so many techniques… April 8th: Went out in the afternoon, returned home in the evening.

April 9th: Went out at 10 am, returned home in the evening.

April 10th: Went out in the afternoon, returned home in the evening.

April 11th. Went out in the afternoon, returned home in the evening.

April 11th… My wife has changed a lot lately. Almost every afternoon (sometimes in the morning), she goes out alone, returns four or five hours later, and eats dinner with me. She doesn't want brandy, just a little beer. Kimura is on vacation now, so maybe she's with him. I wonder where they go to kill time.

This afternoon around 2 pm, Minko suddenly came and asked me, "Where's Mom?" I said, "She's usually not home at this time. Didn't she go to your place?" She was also puzzled and said, "I haven't seen Kimura and Mom for several days. Where did they go?" Actually, I know she's in cahoots with them.

April 12th.

Went out in the afternoon, returned home in the evening… I've been going out every day lately. When I go out, my husband is usually home, locked in his study reading something—books are spread out on the table, and he pretends to be reading—but he probably doesn't actually read a single word. I guess his mind is full of curiosity about what I've been doing while I'm out, and he has no interest in reading at all. During this time, he would definitely come downstairs to peek at my diary. Unfortunately, there was no record of my whereabouts during these days. I deliberately wrote about these days in an ambiguous way, only noting "went out in the afternoon, returned home in the evening."

Before leaving, I would always go upstairs, open the study partition door a crack, tell him "I'm going out for a while," and then quietly escape down the stairs. Or, I would just stand on the stairs, say hello, and then leave.

My husband never looked back at me, only nodded slightly, and even if he said something, I couldn't hear him.

Of course, I didn't go out to give my husband time to peek at my diary; I went somewhere to meet Ah Jian. As for why I wanted to meet him alone, it was so that I could touch Ah Jian under the healthy sunlight of the day, without the interference of the smell of brandy.

At Yu Zhen's place, although I had the opportunity to be alone with Ah Jian, I always got drunk at the crucial moment—when we hugged.

Ah Jian was thin, but his chest was quite full, and he was full of healthy vitality. My husband, however, looked frail, pale, and his skin lacked elasticity. If only Ah Jian were my husband, I could only sigh… Even so, I didn't cross the final line. I don't know if my husband believes it. But it's the truth.

Subconsciously, I believed that no matter the mental state, as long as I didn't physically engage in the traditional practices my husband constantly talked about, it wouldn't be considered a breach of chastity. Therefore, I only needed to maintain the formal aspect of chastity and use other methods to do what I wanted. On the afternoon

of April 13th

, I went for a walk, heading south along the riverside road. I saw my wife in the distance. She came out of a shop and walked west. I checked my watch; it was 4:30. She noticed me first and changed direction to avoid me.

The shop she was shopping at was a women's jewelry store, filled with a dazzling array of mesh gloves, earrings, necklaces, and other accessories. I saw Yuzhen arrive. It seemed they had planned this beforehand; my wife immediately stood up and began changing clothes—I guessed it.

My wife came upstairs and stood outside the study, saying, "I'm going out for a bit, I'll be right back." As usual, I just grunted in response.

She went down a few steps, then stopped and added, "Yuzhen's here. You can have dinner with her." "Where are you eating?" I asked deliberately.

"I'll eat when I get back, or you can wait for me and eat together." "I'll eat first. You can eat out and come back later. It's okay if you come back a little later," I replied.

Suddenly, I wanted to see what my wife was wearing today, so I abruptly left the study and looked up the stairs. She had already come down the stairs, and she had been wearing those pearl earrings at home yesterday. She was wearing a white mesh glove on her left hand and was putting on a glove on her right. I guessed that the gloves she bought a few days ago might be those.

Around 6:30, I went downstairs to the living room, where Yuzhen was waiting for me.

"Dad, do you know where Mom went?" Yuzhen asked as soon as we started eating.

"How would I know?"

"They went to a hotel," she said bluntly.

I simply said, "Oh, really?"

"Do you want me to tell you the address?" Yuzhen asked me.

I said, "What's the use of knowing the address? How do you know it?" "I recommended this hotel to Mom. Ajian said it's too conspicuous here, we should stay away." "Dad, what do you think about this?" Yuzhen pressed.

"What do you mean?"

"I heard from Ajian. He said he's still chaste with Mom. I don't believe his nonsense." Dad believes it. Even if Ajian said he had a relationship with your mom, I wouldn't believe it. Liping wouldn't lie to me, she's not that kind of woman."

I suspected Liping had made her say that. The most crucial and worrying thing is that Liping has probably already given everything to Ajian, so she's using Yuzhen to seek my forgiveness.

...One of the reasons I've always believed in my wife's chastity is that she has never refused me. Even on nights after going out on dates with him, she has never been afraid of her husband's advances, and has even been quite proactive. I took this as evidence that she hadn't been with him.

On April 19th

, two days after my husband died suddenly from a cerebral hemorrhage, I opened his desk and took out all his diaries.

Actually, I only looked at his diaries from this year. There were three diaries in front of me. By combining the three diaries, I could understand what had happened over the past few months.

The black diary was his. And I had two. One pink diary was for him to see. Although he said he had never read it, I knew he had been secretly reading it. Just like me, I always said in my diary that I wouldn't read my husband's diary, but I still did. He just never expected that I also had a white diary.

He started writing in the diary from January. When he talked about his wife, I think that's what he was thinking. He said he didn't have any serious illness, but I doubted it. As he thought, Yuzhen renting a place outside was A-Jian's idea. Why rent a place? Of course, it would be for convenience.

Yuzhen told him that A-Jian and I were dating in the rented place, which might have been A-Jian's idea. I didn't know, but I guessed. Why? Because A-Jian wanted to see what her husband really thought. Another reason was to guess how serious his illness was. Yuzhen only felt resentment towards her husband, not love. So I wasn't worried about her.

I had relations with Ajian on April 2nd. I have a detailed record of it in my white diary. That day he took my body.

The entries I made in my pink diary about April 2nd were all lies. I just wanted to mislead my husband. I deliberately said that Ajian and I hadn't had relations. I wanted to make my husband think that he was still in control, to satisfy his vanity.

April 2nd was a turning point. From that day on, my body and mind were completely occupied by Ajian, leaving no room for my husband. I discovered that men are completely different. I originally thought that Ajian and my husband were just different in age. After that day, I understood that they had many other differences, and these differences brought women a world of difference in experience.

Ajian was thin but muscular, and his skin felt soft and elastic to the touch. My husband, on

the other hand, was loose. His penis was thick and long, curving upwards. It seemed to be proudly raising its head towards a woman's private parts. It

was completely different from my husband's straight penis.

But Ah Jian's method gave me an extremely pleasurable experience. I started to obey him completely.

His diary entry for April 1st recorded that Yuzhen warned him that I had a physical relationship with Ajian. This was unexpected, and Ajian probably didn't know either. I glanced at the white diary. I think she was probably jealous. On the afternoon of the 30th, when I went to the rented room, she wasn't there. And when Ajian and I were having sex, when he made me kneel on the bed and did it to me from behind, I vaguely saw a shadowy figure through the curtains. After seeing his diary, I quickly told Ajian. Ajian must have gone to comfort Yuzhen quickly, because Yuzhen didn't appear in his diary after that.

As for the diary entry saying that her husband didn't believe I had a relationship with Ajian, Yuzhen said that even if it wasn't a physical relationship, it would be something worse than a physical relationship. I think what she didn't say was the fact that I gave it to Ajian.

She probably saw me give it to him, but didn't see the process. Yes, rather than saying I initiated it, it was more like he forced it into my mouth. Based on my upbringing, I am extremely resistant to doing such disgusting things; it violates my morals. In the throes of physical arousal that day, I succumbed to A-Jian's will in a daze.

(Excerpt from the White Diary)

April 1st,

A-Jian and I were in the rented room. He wanted to take off my clothes, and I initially refused… Of course, I was just pretending to be reserved. My tricks were no problem for A-Jian. In the end, I was quickly taken by him… He manipulated my body… and despite my protests, he stuck his tongue inside me. He made me spasm in extreme pleasure… But in the end, he didn't penetrate me. I still managed to retain my last bit of fidelity to my husband. But I knew in my heart that this boundary could be breached at any moment. The flood will break the dam. It doesn't depend on me, but on A-Jian.

If you ask me whether my chastity can be preserved, don't ask me, ask him—A-Jian.

April 1st, I went to the rented room. He manipulated me casually on the bed, and I obediently posed in various positions for him to penetrate me. I could see that he was trying his best to satisfy me. And I was listening to the call of my body and heart.

He gave me two ejaculations.

From April 2nd to 7th, I went to the rented apartment every afternoon to meet A-Jian. I kept detailed records in my white diary.

On the 2nd, the three of us went to the park in the morning and stayed at the rented apartment at noon. Although I was shy, A-Jian had sex with both me and Yu-Zhen separately for the first time.

This is where he was stronger than my husband; he ejaculated three times. He ejaculated twice inside me. His performance was very convincing because he proposed a plan: to marry Yu-Zhen and then the three of us would live together. Of course, this required Yu-Zhen to make sacrifices.

On April 2nd,

when I realized he had entered me, it was too late. I said no, but I actively spread my legs to allow him to penetrate me more deeply. He straddled me and brought me to the peak of ecstasy, letting me experience the humiliation and pleasure of being completely conquered. I didn't know he would do this. At least yesterday, he was still hesitant. Although he was infatuated with my body, he told me he didn't want to do anything to betray my husband.

My limp body felt like it was floating in the air, my mind went blank, and shame made me desperately try to stop myself from making any strange noises. Waves of pleasure surged through my body. I convulsed, I gasped… In extreme pain and pleasure, I held his body tightly… On the 3rd, I stayed home and didn't go out. A-Jian said he wanted to observe her husband's reaction. On the

4th, I went to the rented room in the afternoon. I was addicted. To be precise, I was addicted to A-Jian. He had awakened my wanton nature. A-Jian had installed a hanging basket in the room. He had me sit inside, spread my legs wide, and he stood in front of me. When I swung over to lean against him, he would penetrate me, sometimes deeply, sometimes shallowly. We indulged in pleasure all afternoon.

On the 5th, when I arrived at the rented room in the afternoon, the door was closed. I went up to the second floor, opened the door, and heard a man and a woman talking inside. I knew what A-Jian and Yu-Zhen were doing. I didn't want to disturb them. But I couldn't suppress my curiosity. I got up and pushed open the door to the inner room.

Yuzhen was straddling him, writhing back and forth, making strange noises. Ajian held her swaying waist with both hands, thrusting upwards repeatedly.

When I saw Ajian working so hard for Yuzhen, I began to suspect that he had fallen in love with her.

I thought I needed to ask him directly.

These past few days, after I got home, I would actively seduce my husband, which was Ajian's idea. He knew my husband's condition had worsened. He wanted to speed things up naturally. My husband took the bait. Although he tried hard, he couldn't give me any pleasure. When his obese body pressed against me, I felt only disgust. I pretended to be excited just to provoke him to work harder. I hoped he would no longer have the chance to use my body; that would be a relief.

He was like a fool, completely oblivious to my true feelings. Only when he ejaculated and got off me

did I disgustedly turn my back to him and go to sleep.

His illness wasn't caused by me, but by the consequences of his past debauchery. I have always loved him from the bottom of my heart, even now. I also despise him because he is stingy and lustful. He used to have a penchant for other men's wives and daughters when he was young, and now his own wife and daughters are in someone else's hands—isn't this retribution? Today,

December 20th

, Yuzhen and Ajian held their wedding. It was a very low-key ceremony. I attended as the bride's parent. When Yuzhen and Ajian bowed to me and called me "Mom," I smiled and nodded in acknowledgment.

The house had been renovated. Yuzhen and Ajian lived on the second floor, and I lived on the third.

On their wedding night, everyone said goodbye. I saw the guests off and returned to the living room. Ajian was holding Yuzhen, who was wearing a wedding dress, and the two were passionately kissing. When Yuzhen saw me, she shyly pushed Ajian away. I said, "Why are you still embarrassed?" Yuzhen said, "Mom, you've worked so hard these past few days." I understood the hidden meaning in her words; she had actually been worried that I would ask to marry Ajian. Actually, I had thought about it, but it was Ajian's decision, not mine.

Late at night, Yuzhen and Ajian went to their room to rest. I lay in bed, unable to sleep, thinking about how they were making love.

The next day, I didn't get up until noon.

Pushing open the door, I saw A-Jian and Yu-Zhen standing in the doorway. A-Jian knelt on one knee and said, "Mom, will you marry me?" Yu-Zhen held a white wedding dress in her hands. I was completely bewildered by their interaction and didn't know what to do. Yu-Zhen said, "Mom, A-Jian is proposing to you

. If you say yes, today will be your wedding day." The living room became a wedding hall. A-Jian held my hand, Yu-Zhen played music, and we danced in the living room. A-Jian said, "Mom, may I kiss you?" I said yes. He hugged me and kissed me deeply.

After a simple ceremony, Yu-Zhen said, "The bride and groom, go to the bridal chamber." A-Jian took my hand and carried me up to the third floor.

A-Jian laid me down on the bed, his hand on my chest. He didn't take off the wedding dress, but simply unbuttoned it, exposing my breasts. His hand went down again, and he said, "Mom, may I take it off?" I nodded shyly.

A-Jian took off my clothes. Now I was only wearing the wedding dress, and underneath, I was completely naked.

A-Jian got up and masturbated. I looked at his already erect penis. I knew he was about to enter, and this was what I wanted most; my lower body was thirstily flowing with fluid.

A-Jian adjusted my wedding dress, exposing my breasts and bare skin. He spread my legs, revealing my nakedness. A-Jian brought his penis close, rubbing it against my vulva. I occasionally raised it to meet his thrusts. He said, "Mom, can I come in now?" I trembled and said yes, Mom was willing.

That night, driven by revenge, I repeatedly demanded it, and each time I finished, I would try to tease his penis, making it hard again. A-Jian ejaculated five times, exhausted.

The next day, A-Jian woke up very late, looking completely weary.

Yu-Zhen saw him and teased him, saying, "The groom is exhausted, Mom, please forgive him." A-Jian looked embarrassed.

I laughed and said, "If he's not good enough, I can marry again." Then I burst out laughing at my own words.

[The End]

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