[Yi Ning's Memories (Self-Recollection Version)...First Boyfriend] [Author: sam309]

Author: sam309
Words: 11234

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Yi Ning's Memories (Self-Recollection Version)...First Boyfriend

I can only secretly type this article when my girlfriend comes home, so the progress won't be too fast. Please forgive me. Why
...can I only secretly type this article?

I'm not very good at writing novels. All of this...is too close to reality...

my girlfriend will probably break up with me if she sees this.

1-1 Yi Ning's Inner Thoughts

I don't understand why men always have to ask these things. Haven't you been with other women before
?

Being with me isn't your first love.
Although after hearing about my past relationships, you become more and more beastly. The harder you fuck, the more perverted you are?
You only feel good when your woman is fucked by other men.

That year, I was 16, just graduated from junior high. During summer vacation, although I had nothing to do at home and my parents were both
working, for some reason, my family was extremely controlling. If I wanted to go out with friends to see
a movie or go shopping, they wouldn't allow it. If I sneaked out, I'd get
a good beating from my mother when I got home. Those few years were really tough.

I have two older brothers, each two years younger than me. They usually have their own lives and rarely
interfere in my affairs. Frankly, they didn't want to bring a burden when they went out with friends. Well, since my parents were both busy with work,
it was almost always just the three of us at home. Sometimes, they would bring friends over, and I'd get bored
and chat with them. That's how I met my first boyfriend.

The house was an old one, and strangely enough, old houses in Taiwan often only have one bathroom, which was a
big problem. That bathroom was right in the middle of the house, with a large window, though it was
1.8 meters high, so you couldn't usually see inside. I always kept the window open when I showered because it
would be very stuffy inside.

At first, I wasn't quite sure, but around the second year of junior high, there were a few... Every time I took a shower, I felt there were some
strange noises outside the window.

I was a little curious. Besides my two older brothers, there was no one else at home, and we didn't have any pets. Why
was the TV still playing outside? And why were there always noises outside the window? The window faced the kitchen, and every night
when I took a shower, someone would go and turn off the kitchen light, and occasionally there would be some noise. I initially
thought it was just someone getting a drink of water and didn't think much of it. But the noise kept going. I wondered, "
The light's off, why would they take so long to get a drink of water?" So I tiptoed and looked out the window, but I didn't see
anything. Maybe I was just being paranoid, so I just let it go. I continued showering, nothing happened.

Not long after, one day, neither of my brothers were home. I couldn't find a craft knife, so I
went into their room to look for it. In my eldest brother's desk drawer, I found something strange:
a small mirror… with a chopstick stuck to the back.

Okay, I roughly guessed what was going on. I took the extended mirror, went to the bathroom
window , and held it up. Sure enough, I could see the bathroom clearly. So they were spying
on me while I showered.

But then again, the last time I stood on tiptoe to look out the window, I didn't see anyone. So,
I changed my viewing angle a few times… From this angle, there was one spot where I could only see a tiny bit, specifically
the vanity mirror,
which reflected directly onto my showering position. Because I like to look in the mirror while showering, I always keep the vanity mirror's defroster on. I never imagined my brother would use this to watch me
shower !

Surprisingly, I wasn't angry. Actually, knowing he was watching was
a little exciting. I didn't plan to tell anyone.

I secretly put the mirror back where it was on my desk, but from that day on, whenever I showered
, I would deliberately position myself towards the bathroom vanity mirror. The mirror reflects light, so I spend more time washing my breasts
. I want to wash them carefully and gently. I also spend more time washing my genitals, my hands constantly sliding
over them .

Occasionally, I'll go all out, deliberately making stimulating masturbation motions while washing, like an adult film
actress masturbating. Especially when I see through the mirror that there are actually two people peeking outside with small mirrors…
(because both my brothers wear glasses, and the reflection in the small mirror shows more than
two lenses). I know the more people watching, the more energetic I get, wanting them to see my
beautiful body a little longer.

I like it this way, I know… The more I could provoke them, the more I wanted to provoke them. I was young then, and even though I was
a girl, I had some unspeakable desires that I couldn't talk about with anyone. They were just peeping, and since
they were family, I figured it shouldn't be a problem. This went on for a few days until that incident happened, and things
escalated.

I usually take a shower at a fixed time, about an hour before bed. After showering,
I don't like to run around, so I usually just put on a nightgown without underwear and go to my room to
sleep.

That day, I hadn't been showering long when I was about to start washing myself when there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Sis, hurry up, I need to pee!" my second brother shouted from outside the bathroom.

That's how it is in our old house with only one bathroom; the family often has to fight over the toilet, and this
wasn't the first time.

But that day, only my second brother and I were home, and a thought suddenly popped into my head:

"Anyway, you guys always watch me shower. What haven't you seen? We're family,
what's the big deal?"

So, I just opened the bathroom door and said to my second brother, "Hey, I'm going to shower for a long time."
"Hey, you pee first?"

I remember his expression was... weird, but he still came in anyway. Since he was wearing sweatpants
, he pulled them down and actually started peeing. I continued showering next to him. Actually,
we were both stealing glances at each other. He was probably a little hard, because when he peed, he couldn't control the flow, and
he peed all over the toilet seat.

"Can I borrow the showerhead?"

Hearing my second brother say that, I didn't hesitate and gave it to him. He rinsed the spot where he had peed for
a while, then gave the showerhead back to me and turned to leave.

From that day on, every time I showered, my two brothers would take turns coming in to use the toilet. Eventually, I
simply , and everyone came and went freely. Occasionally, when it was their turn to shower, I would just go in
to use the toilet or get something, so the problem of fighting over the toilet became less frequent.

As these things became more and more common, sometimes when I went to shower... Sometimes, I'd just come out without any clothes on
. There were so many people in the family, the bathroom storage area was always overflowing with everyone's dirty laundry.
There was nowhere to put my clothes if I wanted to change, so I just grabbed a towel to dry myself off – that was the most convenient thing to do. My two older brothers had seen it before,
so I became more and more casual.

One day, I heard voices in the living room. It was my eldest brother, I don't know what he was saying.
After showering, I came out without clothes on as usual. Oh no! Two of his
classmates were in the living room. I knew they'd seen me, but... I was too embarrassed to greet
them , so I just pretended no one was there and walked into my room at my usual pace. That night, I
masturbated for the first time in my life.

It's not that I wasn't ashamed of doing it; a 15 or 16-year-old girl, still inexperienced,
being seen naked like that by others—oh my god, it was incredibly embarrassing! My brother,
knowing my habit, it's one thing for them to see me normally, but when friends come over, he doesn't even ask first, leaving his sister
completely unguarded and exposed. This... What would they say about me?

But... but

how could that feeling of shyness turn into such intense pleasure?

I honestly didn't know what words to use to describe my feelings. Even though I was walking naked in
front of , it felt like the first time I discovered someone was peeping at me while I was showering, like the first time I opened the bathroom door and let
someone in, like the first time a doctor touched my breasts and looked them over during a school health check.
It was a feeling I knew was bad, but it was incredibly stimulating.

Was it my uterus? Was it controlling my vagina and clitoris from that position? My vulva sent a hot
, tingling sensation through me.

I lay on the bed, closed my eyes, and reached for my breast with my left hand, gently and softly cupping its
rounded shape. My fingertips occasionally brushed against the nipple, and the tingling sensation spread from near my heart.
The rhythm of my grasping, sometimes firm, sometimes gentle, alternated as I fantasized that handsome senior was using his basketball-playing hand to caress my
chest.

My right hand was always the focus; the secretions from my genitals seemed to be flowing out involuntarily. Would I get the bed dirty
and someone notice?

Never mind, that's not important. My right index finger pointed towards the opening... With a little of my own secretions on it, my labia
were already slippery. What followed was a very small, subtle movement: the fingertip flicking left and right, causing my clitoris to press completely
against a part of the finger. Because of the slipperiness, the gentle movement made my stomach ache from the stimulation; my abdominal muscles
twitched incessantly, and my legs lifted slightly with the movement. Oh… is this
the bad thing the school says we can't do? Why can't I stop my desire?

The urge to continue consumed my thoughts. Is it shameful? Is it disgusting? But I just love it!

The movement of the index finger is irresistible. This caused my desire to surge, I wanted...
I wanted something to fill my womb...

I quickened the movements of my right hand, and the feeling of longing became even stronger. I longed to be embraced by a broad chest,
to be kissed passionately, to have my breasts held tightly and never let go, to have my lower body satisfied and filled...
My mind and body experienced a sense of emptiness and fullness. The pleasure from my clitoris made it impossible to think, yet it felt like it was being stuffed full
. My whole body was a mixture of heat and excitement, and I couldn't stop myself from contorting my body. Naked, I could only continue
to pursue my naked desires. I could even smell the faint scent of a woman's vaginal secretions
, but I felt no shame. Instead, it only fueled my desire, and my index finger moved
more and more vigorously on my clitoris.

My entire body had turned red without me even realizing it. My left hand touched a hard nipple, and
oh… it felt so good. The pleasure spreading from my clitoris was irresistible.

I could feel the muscles around my pelvis contracting and relaxing repeatedly, waves of desire for intercourse
washing over me. But then, suddenly, I had an overwhelming urge to urinate.

"Oh no, what if I pee? What about the sheets?? This thought immediately jolted me awake. I quickly pulled
my right index and middle fingers away from my clitoris. This is terrifying! I'm in middle school and I still wet the bed. My
mom will be furious. How am I supposed to face everyone after this? This thought woke me up completely.

My heart was pounding before my movements slowed down. In this society, sex is considered taboo. I don't
know, but I just keep thinking about it. It feels so good, so light, the hunger and craving it brings.
I love it, I just love it."

In the days that followed, my brother didn't mention the time his friend saw me naked.
Instead his friend... My classmates often come to my house for gatherings. Of course, if there are people at home and they
arrive before I've showered, I'll bring clothes in and put them on before leaving. If they come in the middle of my shower, I still
walk out of the bathroom completely naked, though not quite naked enough to greet them completely naked. The
boys are quite tactful; if they're dressed, they'll greet me, but if they're not, they'll silently pretend no one's there
.

He's one of my older brother's classmates who often comes over.

After showering, I often go out to my room in my pajamas to chat with my brother's classmates.

Actually, I'm ostracized at school, and my family doesn't allow me to go out unless my brother takes me with him.
Opportunities like that are rare.

Sometimes classmates would ask me to go shopping or something. A small group of girls in my class
would initially ask me, but I could only tell them I couldn't go out because my family was very strict. However, a
couple of times my brother took me (actually, I insisted on going) to Ximending, and my classmates saw us. When we got back, they
said I was a liar, refusing to go out even though I could. Over time, people in my class stopped
talking to me.

When people came over, these older boys seemed to enjoy chatting with me. I knew it because I always
wore only a one-piece pajama. Although the fabric wasn't very sheer, my movements weren't exactly
graceful often sat cross-legged on the sofa, shifting my legs, bending over to get a cup from the coffee table to
drink tea…

or eat. Since I wasn't wearing underwear, my pajama only covered half of my thighs when I stood up.
When I sat cross-legged, everyone's eyes were fixed on my pubic hair, the mysterious garden at the base of my thighs often
flashing before their eyes… In front of those energetic young boys, when I bent over, I didn't deliberately cover my chest. This
old nightgown had long been washed until the neckline was loose. I didn't mind them looking at me; in fact, I liked teasing them like this , using my breasts, nipples, and genitals to seduce them among a pack of thirsty wolves. This made me quite popular
among them. No one ignored me, and they loved chatting with me. The feeling of being ostracized at school vanished. I enjoyed the joy of being a little princess among a group of older brothers. I enjoyed... the desire of men who wanted me but couldn't have me. 　　I liked him. Among my brother's classmates, he was someone I got along with particularly well. 　　In junior high, I don't know why, but I really liked Babyg and Swatch watches. I don't know where he got his hands on Japanese magazines, but he would buy me many new watches that were hard to find anywhere in Taiwan. We often discussed these cute new products. He knew so much. In that era before the internet was developed, he was really amazing at finding so many of these things. 　　That day, my brother came alone, without any of his other classmates. It was strange; he often brought people over and then went straight to his room, leaving me to entertain them. But I still managed to chat happily . 　　Suddenly, my brother told me he hadn't eaten dinner and was going to buy his favorite fried chicken from the shop next door— the one with lines. He grabbed his keys and left, leaving me at home with him talking about watches. 　　He told me he really liked me and wanted me to be his girlfriend. I agreed because I liked him too. 　　I gave him my virginity, and although we didn't end up together, I don't regret it. 　　Not long after we started dating, he joined the army. He came from a wealthy family and was an only child. Although he was promoted from private to corporal in less than six months, his monthly government salary was only 6,142 yuan. In addition , his father insisted that joining the army meant becoming a man, and his family couldn't give him pocket money. Although his mother would occasionally slip him money, he couldn't spend it as freely as before. His time in the army didn't seem to be going smoothly . I often heard that he was denied leave or was physically punished. His temper became terrible; he would throw things and yell at the drop of a hat. He would do this whenever things didn't go his way. I think he was really unhappy in the army. 　　My brother went to serve in the army, so his friends rarely came to our house anymore. Occasionally, when we all had leave together, they would still come over for a gathering. I would still do the same thing, coming out in my pajamas without underwear to chat with everyone. He never asked me to do that. But I myself have changed a bit. From a girl, I 've become a woman. When I chat with people, I keep my legs open longer. Even if my clothes aren't properly pulled up when I'm sitting in a chair, I'm too lazy to pull them up. But this only applies to my brother's old classmates. As for other people... I don't want to come out and chat with them. 　　After dating for more than a year, he was about to be discharged from the army. Actually, my boyfriend and I were arguing more and more, but we were still boyfriend and girlfriend. We did a lot of lovemaking, but his tendency to throw things and get angry went from once every two or three times he came home to two or three times every time he came home. Almost everything in his house was smashed and damaged . His family couldn't control him either. 　　One day, he told me he was going on leave. I was so happy; I hadn't seen him for over a week and had been eagerly waiting for his day off. I rode my motorcycle to the train station to pick him up. He said he had performed well in the army, and his superiors had given him half a day's leave early. When I went to pick him up that evening, I found he wasn't alone. He introduced me to his company's sergeant major, who wanted to take us to karaoke. 　　I was thrilled; it had been so long since we'd gone karaoke together. I left my motorcycle at the station and took a taxi with them to KTV. 　　His sergeant major didn't look very old, about 1.8 meters tall, very tall and strong— the typical physique of a soldier. He had dark skin and was very talkative. I had a good impression of him from the start. 　　"Zhiwei, your girlfriend is so pretty, how come I've never seen her visit the military base?" 　　My boyfriend was chatting with the sergeant about military matters, but when he saw me singing alone, he probably thought I was bored and changed the subject to get me to join in. 　　"She's not very good at getting around, is she? If she goes to such a remote place like our camp, by the time she finds her way, the visit be over." 　　"Yeah, I'm really bad at finding my way around." 　　"How old are you, little sister? You look so young." 　　"I'm 17, I'll probably be 18 by the time Zhiwei gets discharged." 　　"Oh, so you were riding without a license just now?" He said with a slightly playful tone, the sergeant 's teeth were quite white. 　　"Shh?? Don't tell the police, okay?" 　　　　　　　　　　　　　Zhiwei chimed in, 　　"Come on, I haven't properly introduced you to the sergeant. Her name is Yining, just call her Ningning. Come have a drink with the sergeant." 　　Maybe it's because I'm young, but I rarely drink. That day, however, I picked up the glass on the table without hesitation and downed the remaining half in one gulp. It was so spicy and hot! I thought I had taken Zhiwei's glass; he always adds a lot of water to his whiskey. But it turned out I had taken the sergeant's glass; he drinks straight whiskey.

I managed to suppress the rising alcohol urge, afraid of embarrassing Zhiwei in front of the sergeant.

"Wow, little sister, you can really drink! You downed half a glass of straight whiskey in one gulp. Come on, let me have half a glass with you."
The sergeant picked up my empty glass, poured more than half a glass of straight whiskey, and downed it in one gulp as well
.

For the rest of the time, the three of us happily sang and chatted, listening to many
funny . It had been a long time since I'd felt so close to Zhiwei. After joining the army, he
was always quiet at home, easily getting angry over the slightest thing. I was afraid to talk to him about anything, so
I tried to stay silent. It was such a rare opportunity for us to chat and laugh together. Plus, the sergeant
was quite good at joking, so I remember the atmosphere in the room was very pleasant until I started to feel the effects of the alcohol and
went from sitting on the sofa to half-lying down and falling asleep.

I started to remember things when I was lying down . On the hotel bed, I was still very drunk and couldn't wake up.

A familiar feeling washed over me; Zhiwei was licking me all over. How come I wasn't wearing any clothes? Never mind, I
was too drunk to open my eyes.

Of course, things didn't end that easily, but my memories were fragmented.

I lay there, my breasts being sucked. This pleasure wasn't as intense as before. Maybe it was the alcohol
, or maybe I was just too used to this man's style of sex. Zhiwei rarely changed his techniques,
and even his positions weren't often different. Even so, I felt that sex wasn't really that important in life, or in a relationship.
That's what I truly thought when I was younger.

Although the feeling wasn't as intense, my genitals were still wet from the stimulation
. The feeling wasn't as strong, but I still felt something. He was lying on top of me, his glans constantly moving at the entrance of my vagina
, as if... He was deliberately teasing me, occasionally applying pressure to his penis. In that semi-erect state,
his penis would move up and down, teasing my vaginal opening and constantly touching my clitoris.
I couldn't help but want to twist my body, but after drinking, I really didn't have the strength to move.
The sound I wanted to make from the pleasure in my throat turned into slow, hissing breaths.

Seeing that I was starting to react, he suddenly got up. I knew he was going to put on a condom again.
Although it was a bit of a downer to have to stop just as the engine was getting warm to put on a condom, I didn't dare
to protest. He was so insistent on protecting me, so I couldn't say anything.

After a while, when the soft, tingling sounds stopped, he didn't wait at all and inserted his entire penis
inside me.

Oh… how come the condoms at this hotel are so bad? It's just a piece of plastic. The friction against my vagina felt
so uncomfortable, but I didn't have the strength to resist. My breathing was slow and silent;
my body was so tired. Although sex was pleasurable, my body couldn't respond to the pleasure.

His habit was to thrust continuously once he penetrated until he ejaculated. This had been going on for over
a year without exception. But perhaps because we were both young, the duration was... alright, at least
ten minutes. However, even when he ejaculated, he wouldn't tell me. Through the condom, I didn't know what
was wrong . Later, I learned that when his penis started to get harder and then he accelerated his thrusting,
it meant "it was almost over." I often wanted to continue, but how could a girl say such a thing?
People would misunderstand and think I was lewd, especially a young girl. I didn't dare to say it.

Damn, that condom was really bad quality. With his penis going in and out, my vagina was constantly being rubbed and
hurt. Anyway, I just had to endure it a little longer until it was over.

Suddenly, he stopped moving and pulled out of my body. "Oh, so we're switching to doggy style now
? How annoying! I'm already drunk and about to throw up, and you're still tossing and turning. What, are
you going to make me throw up all over the bed before you're satisfied? This guy is so inconsiderate!"

After finally managing to turn me over, I lay face down on the bed, and he actually got off! What's going on?
Can't you hurry up and finish so I can get some sleep?

I heard a sound from the head of the bed, like someone unpacking a plastic bag. After a while, someone put an eye mask on me
— the kind provided by hotels.

Then there was almost a minute of silence. I was really tired, and in that short quiet, I almost
fell asleep. Just then, he climbed back onto the bed, behind me, supporting my waist with both hands,
lifting my buttocks, and assuming a riding position.

No, something's not right. The hands that lifted my hips were much bigger, and their palms were very warm. His hands and feet are always ice-cold, all
year round . I often joked that he had a zombie body, but those big, warm hands weren't his.

I was so drunk that I didn't have the strength to stop it all. I opened my blindfold to see what was going on. It felt very strange,
but I wasn't sure what was happening.

The hands that were holding my lower back hadn't let go, gripping me tightly. I could feel their thumbs pressing against
the two slightly indented holes in my lower back. And then, next, an unprotected penis was inserted into my body.

Everything was wrong. This incredibly hard, thick thing was inside me. It was definitely
not Zhiwei; the size difference was too great. But, without a condom,
the feeling of skin-to-skin contact, the pleasure—just like so many things before—the stimulation from my uterus once again overwhelmed
my reason and morality. I knew, I understood, that the thing inside me wasn't my
boyfriend , but I didn't want to interrupt it all. I just wanted the tide of lust to carry me to the unknown.

This was a completely different experience. He first inserted it shallowly. The sensation inside my vagina hadn't yet
dissipated , and the fact that it wasn't as thick as before made the discomfort and shame even more intensely
sensitive.

Unlike the tearing sensation of the first time we made love, I could bear it now. It felt like something was being inserted into my lower body,
but the sheer size still caused a faint pain in my perineum. I turned my head slightly, put my mouth on
the pillow, let my nose protrude, bit the pillow, and couldn't help but moan in sync with his thrusts. This time,
the moans came from inside my body... from my uterus, not from my throat.

He slowed the pace, replacing it with slow, deep movements. Was it because the riding position
allowed him to penetrate deeper? When he slowly inserted his penis, then all the way in, he
stopped. I felt myself being pushed so deep, all the way to my cervix, a
place . I could feel it; I was being pushed so deep, an impact I'd never experienced before. It was so uncomfortable, my lower abdomen
tightened, yet my vagina involuntarily secreted fluid.

At that moment, I didn't care if I was truly drunk or pretending. With my remaining strength, I unconsciously began to twist my waist.
Usually, I wouldn't cooperate with Zhiwei, letting him do as he pleased. But now, I wanted it, I
wanted the feeling of that thick, long thing churning in my abdomen, I wanted him to enter and exit my vagina, forcefully thrusting into my
cervix.

He must have sensed my need too; he began to thrust forcefully, each time, all the way in.
I felt so happy, so thirsty, so satisfied—this was happening to me.

The dizziness, whether from the alcohol or the stimulation of the impact, I felt
my vagina in my pelvic cavity contracting violently and rhythmically, the surrounding muscles clenching.
The sensation continued. I couldn't remember, couldn't think; I could only let the other person relentlessly ride me.

It seemed like there was no stopping. This position made me weak, this stimulation made me
weak , the alcohol made me weak. The only thing was that my vagina continued to uncontrollably tighten and
relax, repeating the cycle endlessly. I

felt like I was ascending to heaven! The feeling of floating on clouds wasn't as fleeting as the last time I masturbated. After soaring to the sky, I climbed even
higher. It was so uncomfortable! After such intense stimulation, even greater stimulation swept over me,
an overwhelming endless roar and moaning that couldn't relieve the pressure imposed on me by the intense sensations.

"No...no...I can't...I can't take it anymore...?"

These words involuntarily escaped my lips for the first time during sex. I was unconscious, but I
couldn't help crying out. However, after hearing my desperate pleas, the thrusting became
even more violent than the previous storm. No one intended to let me, this poor girl who had overdone her orgasm, go; they only wanted to
completely break me down. After I collapsed, they continued to beat me mercilessly.

I couldn't breathe properly anymore; no amount of oxygen could replenish my wildly beating heart. I
remember howling for a long time, but no matter how much I pleaded, it didn't get me any response, only more and more violent penetration
.

That completely limp state was truly mind-numbing. The lustful fluid flowing from my lower body was so wet that
I could feel it even on my knees. I originally thought sex was just a comfortable thing, but I never expected it to be so... It's amazing that this expert has
shown how wild and exhilarating this can be.

The sprint is finally nearing its end; the fullness in my vagina is intensifying. I
know that's the prelude to the man ejaculating. In my current state, I don't want to stop, yet I also want to stop and
catch my breath. God, is this heaven or hell? This

is the first time I've experienced unprotected ejaculation. A warm, hot current is being sprayed
onto my cervix—it feels amazing, especially the slow, continuous thrusting after the ejaculation. My mind, which was previously
unable think clearly, suddenly feels his penis slowly moving in and out of my vagina. Every inch of the vaginal wall
retains that feeling of entry and exit. The prolonged contractions of my vaginal muscles cause my entire body to
contract . What kind of feeling is this?

He gently straightened my legs, making me lie face down again. This time, he really pulled out. That thick ,
breathless thing was truly gone from my body, along with the hot, mixed semen that had just been ejaculated
inside me . Someone brought toilet paper and gently wiped away the fluid. It felt so uncomfortable
; the sheets were completely wet, and lying on them felt damp. I was exhausted. Whether it was from the alcohol or the intense sex, I simply didn't have the strength to react. I could only lie there
limply, unable to move. 　　Not long after, I heard the sound of someone lighting a cigarette. Zhiwei doesn't smoke! The room was so quiet… I could even hear the slightest sound of someone exhaling a cigarette and smell the smoke. 　　Then, I heard someone getting dressed, followed by the door opening. He left, and someone else in the room helped hang up the curtains. I locked the iron chain on the door from the inside, and then… I fell asleep and had no memory of it. 　　I woke up around 10 a.m. to the sound of Zhiwei showering. Turning my head, I saw the cigarette butts in the ashtray on the table. I didn't want to believe last night was real. I pulled back the sheets and looked around my genitals. Everything from last night had been wiped clean, but there was a faint smell of semen in the air . I preferred to believe it was a dream, just a dream. 　　We took the bus to the station to retrieve my brother's motorcycle. It was a day ; no one was home, and no one had contacted me last night. My pager hadn't rung all night; my parents had probably gone sightseeing and went straight to work at dawn. On the way back, I was filled with questions, but I couldn't utter a word until he dropped me off at my house. 　　"Well... I'm going home now. My parents are waiting for me." He walked me inside, not even taking off his shoes, gave me a few words, and turned to leave. 　　"I have a question for you." 　　"Last night...? 　　" "Did we have sex?" 　　At first, I didn't know how to ask. It was my first time being so drunk, and it felt like something unbelievable had happened while I was drunk. I was just a 17-year-old girl, what could I do? 　　"Yes, you know, I held back for so many days in the army, of course I couldn't wait to think about it when I got back. But you were drunk, and I couldn't help myself." He said it so casually, without even a hint of apology , as if I should let him vent his feelings. 　　"Was there anyone else? 　　" "What do you mean by that?" 　　As soon as I asked if there was anyone else, his panicked expression immediately turned into anger, making my heart sink. 　　"I mean, this morning when I woke up, I saw cigarette butts in the ashtray. You don't smoke, so I..."

"Did anyone else go in?"

"Oh... that was the sergeant major! You were drunk yesterday, and I had a few drinks too. He helped me get you to
the hotel bed, and we chatted for about three minutes before he left.

" "Really?

" "What else could I do? I couldn't have carried you alone."

He stood by the door, looking flustered and wanting to leave. I'm young, but not stupid.
I knew something was up, so I went to the door and closed it. I was afraid
the neighbors would hear what I was about to ask.

After closing both the inner and outer doors, I couldn't resist the urge to get to the bottom of things, but tears
kept down my face. With a choked voice, I said the words I didn't want to say.

"I'm asking you, last night, did you let the sergeant major sleep with me...?

" "What did you say?"

"Min Zhiwei, I'm asking you one more time, last night, did you let the sergeant major sleep with me?"

Sudden outbursts were his trademark; he'd explode at the slightest provocation.

"Damn it! What are you talking about, you bitch? What do you mean I should let the sergeant major fuck you?
Who do you take me for? Fuck you, you slut, are you crazy for him to fuck you...?"

I didn't want to hear what he was saying next because he started hitting my electric fan hard, knocking it over.
The mesh on top came apart, and the fan blades broke. I was stunned.

He didn't stop, cursing me as a bitch and a slut. Then, he forcefully
flipped my 34-inch Sony CRT TV off the TV stand. The screen shattered
with an explosion, and a piece of broken plastic hit my calf, leaving a deep scar. He
was still rambling and trying to find something to destroy. My heart broke. It was all real. I became furious
, grabbed his collar with my right hand, pushed him against the door, opened the door, shoved him out,
and slammed the iron door shut.

"Min Zhiwei, get out of here! I never want to see you again in my life!" I choked out, yelling at
the man who was being pushed out.

A barrage of curses continued from behind the door, "You damn bitch, you're so desperate to be fucked that you're going
crazy, and you're spouting nonsense about me playing pranks. Are you fucking sick?"

I ignored him, rushed into my room, slammed the door shut, and started sobbing uncontrollably.

When my parents came home and saw the scene, they almost called the police. I only told them that
Zhiwei had smashed the things during an argument, without explaining why we were arguing, I just kept crying and crying.

My dad still loves me the most. He sighed, took me to the hospital where I got four stitches, and didn't ask any more questions. After cleaning the house
, he bought a new TV.

Although he never said anything afterward, he would always sigh slightly whenever he saw me. I felt like a lost soul,
taking several days off and staying home.

Then one day, after waking up, I suddenly felt full of energy. After washing up,
I rode my family's scooter to the tattoo street in Ximending, chose a fairly cute design, and asked the tattoo artist to get it tattooed on my
calf scar. From then on, I told myself that my first love had happened, but that night,
it really was just Zhiwei and me having sex. The rest was just a feeling from a wet dream; it wasn't
real , and it was all in the past.

Like the tattooed scar, I covered it up in my heart; it was fake,
it never happened.

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[Yi Ning's Memories (Self-Recollection Version)...First Boyfriend] [Author: sam309]

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