What kind of woman am I?

What kind of woman am I?

I've been reading articles on this private forum for a while, but I've never commented. However, I always feel the urge to vent. What follows

are my personal experiences, things I've witnessed, or things I've heard. I believe many people won't believe it,

and it doesn't matter if you don't; just treat it like reading a novel and have some fun. If you believe it's true, listen to it as a story and

don't take it too seriously. But I believe that what I'm about to say has happened to you or you've heard of similar things.

Let me introduce myself first. I'm from a small county in Sichuan. I'll be 31 after the New Year. I've been married for

about 166cm tall and weigh 108kg, which is on the fuller side. I have a college diploma and

work in administration at a private company in a city in Guangdong.

When I was 18, I went to a medium-sized city in Sichuan to study at a college. I met him when I registered; let's call him A. A

was a teacher at the school, around 35 years old at the time. He was picking up new students at the station, and he brought me to the school.

That's how we met. He was very warm and caring towards me. Perhaps it was because I was inexperienced at the time and

had never traveled far from home, but having such a mature man care for me in a foreign place made me feel inexplicably

close to him. He was already married, but he would often ask me out for meals or to hang out at school.

During the National Day holiday in my first year, he and a friend from outside the school took me and another girl from school on

a trip . I had never seen that girl before; she was a year older than me and quite pretty.

After arriving at the tourist destination, he and his friend booked one room, and he booked another room for me and the other girl. The next evening, after dinner,

his friend took the other girl out, and he took me for a walk.

The weather at the scenic spot was great, and the climate was nice, but the place wasn't very famous.

Although was beautiful, not many people went there, so there weren't many people outside at night. We walked and

chatted, enjoying the night view. Before I knew it, he had taken my hand and occasionally put his arm around my shoulder and waist. He

frequently complimented me on my looks and figure, and asked if I had a boyfriend. As a naive

young girl, I was sometimes misled by his praise.

When we reached a grove of trees, he suddenly hugged me, kissed me, and his hands roamed passionately over my body.

Never having been so close to a man before, I was terrified by his actions. I'm sure my heart

was beating . I wanted to refuse him, to push him away, but I was powerless; my mind went blank. His

kisses were passionate, and I involuntarily responded. His hands slipped from outside my clothes inside and touched

my breasts. He was the first man to touch my breasts. When his hands grasped and kneaded them, I

felt an unprecedented stimulation. Although I was embarrassed and wanted to push his hands away, I felt my body

going weak and my whole body burning.

He kissed and caressed me, whispering sweet nothings about how voluptuous and sexy I was, making me

lose myself…

Before I knew it, his hand slipped under my skirt and inside, touching my genitals through my underwear.

I grabbed his hand tightly, trying to pull it away, but my resistance was futile. When he whispered in my

ear that my underwear was soaked, my face flushed, but a strange, stimulating desire surged within me.

Soon , he reached inside my underwear, rubbing my genitals with his fingers. I involuntarily moaned,

releasing his caresses and clinging tightly to him. Before I knew it, he had pulled my underwear down to my

knees, and unzipped his pants, revealing his genitals. He suddenly turned

me over, so my back was to him, and lifted my skirt. Having never experienced intimacy before,

I had no idea what he was going to do. By the time I realized it, he was already inside me from behind. Many people say a woman

's first time is very painful, but for me, the tension outweighed the pain. I held onto a small tree in front of me as he moved

wildly . I wanted to refuse, but I was powerless, and at the same time, I felt a hidden desire. That's how I lost

my virginity.

He was very excited, and soon I could feel his penis throbbing inside me, waves of heat

surging me, and he let out a soft growl. At that time, I didn't know what an orgasm was. He ended

my virginity just like that.

He took out some tissues from his pocket and handed me a few. I took them shyly and cleaned myself

. He cleaned himself too, and then asked me when I was going to get my period. I didn't know what he meant at the time,

and I was too embarrassed to answer him. He asked me several times before I finally answered. Later, I realized that he was trying to determine if I was

in my safe period. On the way back to the hotel, he kept holding me and occasionally slipped his hand inside my collar to touch

my breasts, and occasionally kissed me. I didn't know what to say, my face was flushed, and I couldn't hear or remember

what he said in my ear. I was a little confused...

On the way back to the hotel, he received a call from his friend. I don't know what they talked about. After hanging up

, he hugged me with an incredulous smile on his face. I asked him what was going on, but he didn't say anything, just hugged and

kissed me.

Back at the hotel, our rooms were next to each other. I wanted to go back to my room, and he wanted to come in with me. I wouldn't let him,

saying that the girl was in the room. But he hugged me and smiled mischievously, whispering in my ear that she and his friend were in

their room. I asked him how he knew, and he said his friend had just called him. That's when I realized what that

incomprehensible smile he had given me on the way back was all about.

I could only say, "You men are so bad," and had no choice but to let him into our room. As soon as we were in the room, his

masculine nature kicked in again. He pinned me to the bed and started groping me.

When he took off my underwear and lifted my skirt, I saw bloodstains on my underwear and skirt under the light. He saw them too, and while

touching me, he asked if that was my first time. I nodded shyly.

In a moment of excitement, he pulled down his pants, his erect penis exposed

before . Embarrassed, I closed my eyes. He grabbed my hand and made me touch his genitals, nervously instructing me

to use my hand to caress them.

I was terrified the girl would return and told him to quickly put his pants back on, but he said she wouldn't be back that night.

As he spoke, he spread my legs again and penetrated me. In his frenzy, my clothes...

He stripped me completely naked. It was the first time I'd ever exposed myself to a man, the first time I'd ever seen

a man naked before me, and so passionately on top of me. Gradually, my body pounded like a tidal wave,

growing more and more intense. Finally, with his thrusts, I reached my climax. I didn't dare scream, but he encouraged me, and with

his encouragement, I couldn't help but cry out. Later, I learned that was an orgasm. He ejaculated inside me again

, touching me as he asked how I felt. I was too embarrassed to answer, but he said that very few women

orgasm on their second time. I didn't understand what an orgasm was; I just felt an unprecedented stimulation and

pleasure .

That night, we showered together and slept together. That night was the first time a man had held me as I

slept. I couldn't sleep, but he started snoring. The soundproofing in that small hotel was poor. In the quiet of the night, I could

vaguely hear sounds coming from next door that aroused me again. I secretly touched my genitals,

and they became wet again. I glanced at him sleeping soundly beside me. I wanted to touch his genitals but didn't dare...

I forced myself to...

When I woke up the next morning, he was stroking me, kissing my breasts, and his hand was exploring my genitals.

He saw I was awake, grabbed my hand, and made me touch his genitals. His penis was very hard and large. He wanted me to

masturbate him with my hand. After a while, he wanted me to give him oral sex. I felt nauseous and refused immediately.

He didn't force me. When I was soaking wet, he entered me again. This time, I didn't suppress my moans, and

he encouraged me to scream loudly. I remembered hearing the same sounds from next door in the middle of the night, and the thought of

them doing the same thing aroused me even more. I quickly reached the orgasm he described… He

also ejaculated while I screamed. This time, he didn't ejaculate inside me, but on my breasts…

We slept until almost noon that day. The phone rang in the room; his friend called to invite us to

lunch. When I met another girl at the restaurant, we both blushed with embarrassment.

For the next few days, we lived separately as two couples until I returned to school. During this time, he was wild with me

every night, making me orgasm. I came to love sex during orgasms, enjoying

moaning loudly during his thrusts and screaming during my own orgasms. He also taught me how to enjoy sex during those few days. He's a very experienced

man and knows how to make me enjoy it. He said sweet nothings, and I believed him; since high school,

my breasts have always been relatively large compared to my peers, and I've even been embarrassed about it. We never

talked about what our future relationship would be like. I knew he had a family and a lovely son,

but I was lost in his passion. The night before I went back to school, after we were intimate, he told me

not to ask him out after I returned, not to contact him at certain times, and that he should contact me first.

I was speechless because I knew he had a family! I couldn't affect his family. For

the next three months after returning to school, we were together at least once every two weeks. He would usually

book a room by the hour, arrange a time, and I would go there. After our intimate encounter, we would separate outside the school and go back inside.

One evening, a classmate and I were shopping when I witnessed something unexpected in front of a hotel.

He was walking out of the hotel with the girl he'd traveled with during the National Day holiday, occasionally kissing her cheek and

stroking her buttocks. They didn't see me, but my classmate did. She

knew him too. To avoid embarrassment for us, my classmate pulled me into a nearby shop to hide

from them . After they left, my classmate whispered in my ear that he often booked hotel rooms with female students.

Suddenly, my mind went blank. I wondered if anyone, whether he or I, had seen me in those rooms.

A chill ran down my spine, and I shivered. It turned out I was just one of his many female students.

From then on, whenever he asked me to come over, I never went, and I never contacted him again.

But A sparked my sexuality. Some classmates pursued me during school, but I

never dated any other boys because of A's influence. I always took care of myself when I needed to, until the second

semester . During this time, a classmate took me to a dance hall to learn to dance, and I fell in love with dancing. I often went to the school

dance hall or other dance halls outside the school on weekends. Once, I went to a dance hall outside the school with a female classmate.

A man around 30 years old (I'll call him B) frequently asked me to dance. My classmate was sensible and

avoided us, trying to keep us alone. She also met a good dance partner, and they often danced together

. B would ask me to dance with him, one song after another, chatting with me as we danced. He was very witty, and from our conversation,

I learned that he was the head of a branch office of a large company from another city, stationed in my city.

He often came to dance halls in the evenings when he had nothing else to do. From then on, I don't know why, but I always looked forward to going to that dance hall on weekends

. Every time I went to that dance hall on weekends, I would run into him, and he would always ask me to dance all night, not giving other

men a chance to ask me out. I was also waiting for him, intentionally or unintentionally. Every time I went, it was that female classmate who came with me,

and that female classmate was always dancing with the same dance partner. One night, my female classmate told me she had to

leave early. I saw her and that guy leave the dance hall one after the other. That night, she didn't go back to her dorm,

and she didn't go to class the next morning. I didn't see her until noon. I didn't ask her what she was doing,

but I knew she was with that guy the night before. Later, I saw her with that guy many

times . For several weekends in a row, she didn't go dancing with me, and I didn't see that guy when I went to the dance hall.

I knew she was with that guy. Later, one time she got drunk and told me about that man. She

said he had a good family, his wife had gone abroad, and she had spent those nights at his house.

He took advantage of her passionately at his house, making her infatuated. But his wife went back to her country, and he stopped seeing her.

That time she got drunk and cried a lot.

Let me get back to my story with B. On those weekends when my female classmate didn't go to the dance hall with me, I went

alone When I danced with B, B also asked me why I hadn't seen my classmate. I joked that she had

a boyfriend. B asked me if I had a boyfriend, and I said I was so ugly, how could any man be interested in me? B

whispered in my ear that I was actually very voluptuous, very sexy, and very alluring to men. When he said that, I clearly felt...

I felt his hand stroking my back; his penis was already hard, pressing against me intermittently during the dance. I

started to feel dazed again; the frenzied sensation of him on my body was faintly emerging, and I felt a reaction in my genitals. When

he said provocative things to me, my face flushed, and my body heated up. His touch felt like electric shocks

, numbing me. That time, he asked me to go out for late-night snacks after dancing, but I refused, not knowing

why .

The second time I went to that dance hall alone, as the music was about to end, he asked me to go out for late-night snacks again.

This time, I don't know why, but he had a certain allure to me. After snacks, he asked me to go see a midnight movie,

and I didn't refuse. It was more like a video recording than a movie; the recording was played continuously throughout the night, and not many

people watched it. During the movie, he grabbed my hand and stroked it. My heart was racing, and I couldn't concentrate on

what was happening on the screen. I didn't know whether to refuse him or not. Slowly, he put one arm around my shoulder and the other

on my thigh. I was wearing a dress, and his hand on my thigh felt

like I grabbed his hand that was stroking my thigh. Suddenly, his hand, which was on my shoulder

, slipped inside my neckline and touched my breast. I let out a soft moan and leaned my head weakly against his shoulder. He started kissing

my lips. I cooperated with him, and with my silent encouragement, his hand that was stroking my thigh suddenly slipped

under my skirt and expertly reached into my underwear. I was already soaking wet. I squeezed his

hand between my legs, trying to stop him. He was very experienced, employing a feint attack strategy. When I focused on his attacks below,

he switched to attacking above; when I defended against his attacks above, he switched to attacking below. Soon, my

defenses crumbled. One hand slipped inside my collar, caressing my breasts, while the other hand's fingers were already

inside me from below, his lips being kissed. He whispered sweet nothings in my ear, and

I lost myself. He somehow managed to unleash his penis, pulling my hand to touch it.

I felt a surge of desire and actively let him masturbate me. My underwear was soaked through; if

it were under the lights, my skirt would surely be wet too.

His fingers explored my genitals, and soon, under his touch, I reached orgasm. I wanted

to scream, but I didn't dare—we were in a movie theater. During my orgasm, my hand gripped his penis tightly; he later said

I hurt him. Even after I climaxed, I was still stroking him with my hand. He said it wasn't comfortable to use his hand, so

he pressed my head down and rubbed his penis against my face and lips. He brushed my lips with his hand, and I knew he wanted

me to use my mouth. This time, I didn't feel the disgust I had when A wanted me to use my mouth. When B wanted me to use my mouth, I also

refused, keeping my lips tightly closed. But when he pinched my genitals with his fingers, I opened my mouth in pain,

and shoved his penis into my mouth. I heard him groan softly. His hands held my

head and moved it up and down. When my teeth touched his penis, he even taught me to use my lips and tongue, not my teeth.

I followed his guidance, and soon he ejaculated into my mouth. When he ejaculated, I struggled to spit his semen

out, not wanting him to ejaculate in my mouth, but his hands held my head down, preventing me from moving. Just like that, his thick semen

shot into my mouth, and I felt like vomiting. He let go of me, and I spat out his semen. He comfortably stretched out his legs and

half-reclined on the chair, his hands occasionally touching my face, my back, and my thighs. We straightened our clothes, and he

held me close, speaking softly and occasionally touching my sensitive areas. He asked if I had ever masturbated before, and that's when I

realized what masturbation was called. I was 19 that year.

We stayed in the movie theater for less than an hour. He said let's go back; it was already past 1 a.m.

, and the dorms were long closed. I couldn't go back, so he took me to his dorm. He rented a

two-bedroom apartment, nicely furnished, and for the next six months, I came to that room almost every week.

As soon as I entered his dorm, he hugged me from behind, groping me all over. Soon, he pulled down my underwear.

He didn't take off all his clothes; he lifted my skirt, and I held onto the bed while he thrust into me hard from behind

. I started screaming loudly, releasing the pent-up desire of the past year. My screams aroused him, and he became even more

frenzied . He ejaculated quickly, and when he pulled out, I saw he was wearing a condom. I didn't know when he

had put one on.

Later, we showered together. It wasn't really a shower; it was more like mutual caressing. During the shower, I initiated oral sex

on him again. I don't know why, but I found oral sex quite enjoyable. Hehe. That night, we did it

several more times, I don't remember exactly how many, but I clearly remember that I started initiating it. The next day was Sunday, and

we didn't get out of bed. We stayed in bed cuddling, and I don't know how many times we did it, only that he

ran out of , so he went out and bought two boxes. He also brought some food up to make a simple lunch. I felt

very excited and tireless. We didn't get up until seven or eight o'clock in the evening, ate a simple dinner, and he drove me back to school.

As I got out of the taxi and slowly walked into the school gate, I felt like my legs couldn't close, and I started to feel a

slight pain down there.

After that, I rarely went dancing anymore. Instead, I would arrange to meet him at his dorm at a set time. I stopped going out

only on weekends and started staying overnight at his place during the week. Sometimes we would make love all night. In his

dorm, I started watching pornographic videos with him, and he would make love to me while we watched. I completely

let loose with him. His desires were very strong, and his energy was abundant. I often needed to rest for several days after we made love

before I felt my genitals return to normal.

During our relationship, I learned that he was also a married man, but for some reason, I never

thought about marrying him. He was also a man of good taste. During our relationship, he said that my temperament

was more suitable for a career woman. He taught me how to dress and bought me dresses, stockings, and

high heels that suited my style. Of course, he also bought me sexy lingerie. At that time, this kind of lingerie was not available in our

city ; he brought it all from the south. He wanted me to wear sexy lingerie when we made love, and he was always very

excited.

During our relationship, he frequently treated me and that female classmate to meals, so she knew about

our relationship. Later, he even introduced her to a boyfriend. After one of our passionate encounters, he finally

told me he was being transferred to another city for work and would be leaving soon. I burst into tears; I already knew all along.

The result was finally approaching. After crying, we made love wildly again. Later, I was almost always the one initiating. I guess he was scared, because he

couldn't get an erection anymore. A few days after that, he left my city. Before leaving, he

called me, saying he would miss me, that he was happy with me, and wishing me a good life. I cursed at him:

"Go to !" and hung up.

By then, I was in the first semester of my third year. During this time, I consistently rejected men. Although I sometimes had

strong physical needs, I relieved them with my hand. During this period, I

went , and sometimes I went alone. Some men showed interest in me, but I only allowed them

to touch my back. When they tried to go deeper, I avoided them.

In the second semester of my third year, near graduation, the school organized us to do internships in other cities. We were divided into groups, and our

group of two girls and three boys went to a company in another city in the province for a three-month internship.

The company rented dormitories for us. I shared a room with the girl, and the three boys shared another room. The company was

a medium-sized state-owned enterprise undergoing restructuring, gradually becoming a shareholding company and eventually privatized. Therefore, its management style was

essentially that of a private company, and the main management personnel had been replaced by people sent by the private owner.

We were assigned to different departments for our internships, and I was assigned to the same department as a guy (let's call him C). He

had a girlfriend, who was also our classmate, but she wasn't interning in our group; she

was interning in another city. During our internship together, we gradually developed feelings

for each other enjoyed spending time together, hanging out, watching movies, going to bars, and dancing. Finally, one time

after going to a bar, on our way back to the dorm, he hugged me and kissed me, and I reciprocated. That night, in a

dark park, we had our first time. After the first time, there was a second, a third…

A week before our internship ended, after we had sex in a small hotel, I asked him what he and his girlfriend were going to do.

He said they had a great relationship, had even met each other's parents, and both sets of parents were very satisfied. I knew that things

were impossible between us. I slapped him, cried, put on my clothes, and left.

I didn't want to go back to the dorm, so I wandered aimlessly through the

streets ,

tears streaming down my face. Then someone called my name. I turned around and saw it was the company's vice president (D), who was casually strolling around. He saw me walking there crying and called out to me. This vice president was sent by a private boss. He usually seemed

quite concerned about our studies as interns, and I could clearly sense that he liked me. He had asked me out

to dinner , but because of the trauma from A and B, I kept finding excuses to refuse him. That night, I ran into

him. He saw I was heartbroken and asked what was wrong. I told him I'd broken up with my boyfriend and started crying, crying my

heart out. He kept comforting me and offered to take me back to my dorm. I said I didn't want to go back and wanted to drink. So he

took me to a bar, where I drank a lot. I don't know what happened afterward, but when I

woke up the next day, I found myself naked, and so was he. He was awake too, his hands stroking my body. I asked him

where I was, and he said he was in his dorm, and he lewdly said I'd been very wild the night before. I had no idea

what had happened; I only knew that his hands were stroking my breasts and genitals. When I tried to struggle, he

wouldn't let me, forcibly spreading my legs and inserting his hard, thick penis into my body, moving wildly. I

wanted to refuse, but the weakness from being drunk prevented me from doing so, and I could only let him rape me. At first, I didn't feel anything, but

as he thrust wildly, I slowly began to feel something, and finally, I even reached orgasm, screaming loudly.

He ejaculated inside me as I screamed. He slumped onto me, muttering vulgarities,

like how I was voluptuous, sexy, and that it felt good to be fucked. By then, I had calmed down and asked him how I

ended up there. He said I was drunk the night before and he brought me here. He continued

touching me as he spoke, recounting how many times we'd done it the night before and how cooperative I was. I didn't know what to say. As I got

dressed to leave, he pulled out a pill from somewhere and gave it to me, saying it would prevent pregnancy. I glared at

him but took it and put it in my mouth.

In the following days, D repeatedly asked me out, but I refused each time. I also ignored C during those days.

We finished our internships and returned to school. When I entered the school gate and saw C's girlfriend running over and hugging him,

I felt a pang of sadness.

Soon I graduated. The government no longer cared about our employment; we had to find jobs ourselves. I

was born into a family with no money, no power, and no connections, and my education wasn't high. Many of my classmates went south to find

work, but due to family reasons, I returned to my small county and found an ordinary office job in a state-owned enterprise.

The company wasn't doing well, and my salary was inconsistent. Life was uneventful, but my appearance and temperament attracted

men. Many men pursued me, but they were all playboys, which I didn't like. Instead, I chose him,

who later became my husband. My husband was a low-level civil servant. In inland areas, the salary for a low-level civil servant isn't high or low,

but it's relatively stable. He was honest and not the kind of man who would scheme or plot. At the time, I just wanted to find an honest

man. After experiencing several relationships, I felt somewhat disillusioned with love. So,

two years after graduation, when I was 22, I got married. Although I wasn't very satisfied with my husband, I still got married.

I don't know if my choice was right. Before my marriage, I was laid off and lost my job. I was very frustrated, and my husband and I often argued during this

time . Finally, three months after our wedding, we had a big fight over some trivial matters.

Perhaps we were both too young and impatient. After the argument, I called my classmates who worked in the south. They

knew I was unemployed and suggested I come and visit. After much consideration, I discussed it with my husband. He was just a

low-level civil servant; his job was stable, but the salary was low, not enough to support both of us, and we also had to consider our future

children . Reluctantly, he had no choice but to agree to let me come to the south to work. Finally

, three months after my wedding, I left that small county town and came to Guangdong.

Upon arriving in Guangdong, I was first received by a female classmate I used to dance with in school (let's

call her M1). However, her accommodation was inadequate, so she arranged for me to stay with C's girlfriend. (For context

, C had already broken up with that girlfriend; I'll explain the reason later. C went to Chengdu, while his girlfriend...)

(My friends all came to Guangdong) They all came to the south after graduation. The female classmate I often danced with

worked as a clerk in a factory, while C's girlfriend (let's call her M2 for convenience)

worked as a clerk in a company. At the time, M2 shared a two-bedroom apartment with a man. When she picked me

up and I saw her sharing an apartment with a man, I felt uncomfortable. She said that it's common for men and women to share apartments now because

the security in the south is not good, and it's not safe for girls to live alone. Having a male roommate means that if there's something heavy to

move or if there are plumbing or electrical repairs that require a man's help, there will be someone to help. I thought it made sense, but I still

felt it was inconvenient.

M2's roommate was a boy from Jiangxi. Later, I chatted with him and learned that he was 27 years old at the time. He and M2 had

arranged to share an apartment online. M2 told me about the situation in the southern city, how to find a job,

what to pay attention to when looking for a job, etc. M2 is a pretty girl. We didn't interact much in school, and because of my relationship with C, I always felt a little sad when I was around M2, but she didn't know about my relationship

with C.

I also asked her why she broke up with C. She told me that after graduation, she wanted C to come to Guangdong with her,

but C refused. C said life in Chengdu was too comfortable. C spent some time in Chengdu but couldn't find a suitable

job . M2 wasn't willing to stay in Chengdu any longer, and the two had conflicts and often argued. Finally, one day

they decided to break up, and M2 came to the south. During my conversations with M2, I learned that her salary wasn't very high

(compared to the city in the south), but during the few days we spent together, I felt she was quite generous

. I didn't dare ask her where her money came from.

On my second day in the south, I started submitting resumes at the job market and online,

guided Having just arrived in the south, I wasn't very familiar with the situation and had no job-hunting experience. For almost

half a month, I didn't hear any news and was quite bored. M2 often came home very late at night. When I asked her,

she said she was doing part-time work. I asked her what kind of part-time work, but she wouldn't say. I often chatted with the boy M2 lived with

, and from him, I vaguely learned that M2 was working part-time at a nightclub. One night, M2

came home drunk and vomited a lot. She woke up around 4 AM, and we finally had a deeper

conversation. She told me she worked part-time at a nightclub, but only as a hostess, not for escorts. At the time, I didn't know what

escorting meant. She earned about 200 yuan a day on average. Knowing I hadn't found a job, she asked if I wanted to

work with her. I hesitated and didn't agree. However, I still hadn't found work in the following week

, and I was broke. Finally, one night during my third week in this southern city,

after much deliberation, I waited for M2 to return and told her I wanted to go to the nightclub with her to work as a hostess. M2 explained

some of the unwritten rules of hostessing. The next day, she even paid for a sexy

dress, stockings, and high heels to show off my figure, and she also did my hair. That night, after we finished

dinner together, she took me to a large nightclub. After we went upstairs from the back building, she led

me to a woman in her thirties wearing a business suit. This woman was the supervisor of M2's group. The supervisor

looked me up and down, quite satisfied, saying I was very pretty and had a great figure, and that

many customers would definitely want me. Then she told me a few things to be aware of, and then led me to the room where the hostesses were seated. M2

had a professional uniform, but I didn't. After M2 changed into her uniform, she told me that the nightclub

required uniforms before 11 pm, and after 11 pm, I could change into my own clothes if the customers agreed. A deposit was required for the uniform, and M2 said

she had already paid it for me. She took my measurements, and I could pick it up in a couple of days.

Seeing M2's uniform, I felt quite embarrassed. The nightclub uniform was a semi-transparent halter-neck

short dress, very sexy, with a very low neckline, exposing M2's ample breasts. I asked her if the

men would touch me inappropriately. M2 said sometimes they would. I needed to learn to protect myself, neither letting the guests go too far

nor making them angry. I was a little nervous.

A little while later, the supervisor led our group of hostesses to a private room. The girls around me were all wearing uniforms, but I

was wearing my own clothes, making me stand out. M2 and I were among the first to be assigned to the private room for the guests to choose from. We

stood in a row, and the supervisor was recommending us to the guests. She recommended me first, saying I was new that day

, pretty, and had a good figure, and even asked me to turn around to show them. There were several adult men in the room, all around thirty

or forty years old. A man in his thirties called me to his side and said to the oldest man among them, a middle-aged man

who looked like a client, "Mr. X, this one is not bad, what do you think?" The middle-aged man nodded,

and the man in his thirties told me to sit next to him. That's how I first started working as a hostess. Afterwards,

they made several more rounds of selections and finally chose other girls to accompany them. M2 didn't stay in this private room.

I was very nervous; my heart was pounding. I was a little flustered, and the middle-aged man noticed. He started

chatting with me, asking my name. I gave him the name M2 had given me, but not my real name, just a random one.

Later, he asked my age, where I was from, and so on. When he asked if I had a boyfriend, and I told him I had just

gotten married, he was surprised. He learned through our conversation that it was truly my first time working as a hostess that day, and he didn't make things too

difficult for me. He even taught me how to do it, but occasionally he would hug me, kiss my face, and touch

my full breasts and thighs outside my clothes. He even asked if I had given birth, commenting on how full my breasts were. I was

very nervous, and when he touched me, I didn't know how to refuse. Luckily, his hand didn't go inside my clothes.

I saw the other hostesses in the same room having their male companions put their hands inside their collars and touch them; they all seemed quite comfortable

with it . Perhaps their uniforms made it easy for men to put their hands inside their collars.

Nothing much happened that night. As they were about to leave, the middle-aged man hugged me and whispered in my ear, "Want

to get some late-night snacks with me?" I refused, saying I wasn't familiar with Shenzhen. He didn't say anything, just

wrote down a phone number for me, then handed me 200 yuan and left with his companions.

That's how I completed my first experience as a hostess. Luckily, I met a kind person.

After leaving the private room, I waited for M2 in the room. Their private room hadn't finished yet. I waited for almost an

hour they finally finished. She had drunk a lot of alcohol, but thankfully she was still relatively sober. After changing her clothes, she gave the money to the manager.

We paid her and went back to her dorm. The first day at work went smoothly, nothing too serious.

M2 didn't go every day; she didn't go the second day, and I didn't dare go either. On the third day, she took me again.

My uniform was ready, and it was a little small, emphasizing my figure. Again, I

was the first in the first group recommended to a private room. It was a group of people from Northeast China. A tall, burly Northeasterner chose

me, and M2 stayed in the same room. This time, we weren't so lucky. This customer was a heavy drinker and

liked to make the girls drink. When he was drunk,

he started touching me inappropriately. That night, this Northeasterner made me drink a lot of alcohol, and his hand slipped inside my collar to touch my breasts. I was very embarrassed. While he was touching me, I secretly looked at M2

and saw that she was being held by a man. She was sitting on his lap, hugging his neck,

and the man was touching her breasts with one hand and his other hand was under her skirt touching her thigh.

She was occasionally whispering and laughing with the man. Seeing her like that, I felt a little more relaxed, and my resolve to refuse

the man lessened somewhat. The man did touch my thigh, but

when he tried to reach under my skirt to touch my genitals, I firmly refused. Thankfully, he didn't force me; perhaps it's just the rule here not to touch there

.

The next few times were about the same. During this time, I went for job interviews at two companies during the day, but

without any results.

Finally, one day, after about a week of working as a hostess, I was sexually assaulted by a man,

but I couldn't express my grievances. That time, M2 wasn't in the same private room as me; I was chosen by a man from Northwest China. While

drinking with him, he initially only touched my breasts and thighs, just like the previous times. Later, he

drank a lot, felt nauseous, and asked me to help him to the restroom in the private room. I was inexperienced and unsuspecting.

I helped him to the bathroom, and only after closing the door did I realize he wasn't going to vomit at all.

Instead . I didn't dare scream and tried to push him away, but he was too strong to resist. Eventually, his hand

slipped under my skirt and touched me there, his fingers moving inside. I went

limp and was terrified. For the first few minutes, I didn't

know clung tightly to his neck. He was excited and kissed me on the lips. At first, I actually

cooperated a little, but then I broke free from his kiss. My legs were tightly pressed together, and I was already soaking wet. When he saw that

my legs were pressed together and he couldn't pull his fingers out, he took them out and started kneading my plump buttocks. Then he grabbed my

hand and made me touch his genitals. He had already taken his penis out, hard, and wanted me to masturbate him. I refused, and he

whispered in my ear, "Get him out of there, or you won't let me go tonight." I knew he meant what he said.

I had no choice but to use my gloves to caress his genitals. He rubbed my breasts with one hand and touched my buttocks with the other, all the while saying

I was voluptuous, very sexy, and very wet. His words aroused me, and I was indeed

very wet; my underwear was soaked. If he had continued to force himself on me, I might have been raped. Thankfully, he didn't

. After a short while, he let out a low growl and ejaculated a thick stream of semen, which covered my

hand. Seeing his semen come out, I actually felt a strange mix of pleasure and regret. This was the first time since my marriage that I had touched

another man's genitals and brought him to orgasm, but I didn't feel any guilt towards my husband. While I was washing my hands,

the man was still behind me, lifting my skirt and touching my buttocks. I lightly slapped his hand and told him he

was bad. He smiled, took out 100 yuan from his pocket, and stuffed it into my hand, saying he had a great time and this

was extra for me. After I tidied myself up, he put his arm around me and we left the bathroom. When we came out, his friends were still laughing at him, asking if he

had enjoyed himself. My face turned bright red... I was so embarrassed, like everyone had

seen what we were doing earlier.

That night, I didn't tell M2 about it; I was too embarrassed to say it, and I didn't know how.

But when I got back and was showering, I touched myself, still thinking about

what happened in the bathroom, and I quickly reached orgasm. This was the first time I'd masturbated since coming to the South; I had

n't done it in a while.

About two weeks after I started working at the nightclub, I met him (let's call him E). He brought

some of his friends to the nightclub, and he chose me. He was in his forties, the owner of a trading company,

and a tall, imposing man from Northeast China. After I sat down next to him, he asked me a lot of questions, which I answered truthfully or falsely.

He knew I was new to the South and hadn't been working at the nightclub long. He said I had a good presence, and his

friends were also saying I was nice, and that E should take me in. I didn't know what taking me in meant. That evening,

like everyone else, he touched my breasts and thighs. Near the end, he put his arm around me and asked if I wanted to

work at his company. I told him the truth: I'd been there for a while but hadn't found a suitable job, and if

I found one, I'd leave. He wanted me to work as a clerk at his company, saying he was looking for a suitable one

. I was happy to hear that and agreed. Before leaving, he gave me his phone number and told me to call him the next day

.

When I went back to the dorm with M2, I didn't tell her about it. The next morning, after M2 went to work, I

called him from a public phone. He recognized my voice and told me to come to his company. I didn't have any

suitable clothes, so I wore the dress, stockings, and high heels M2 had bought me. It was almost noon when I finally found his

company . It wasn't big, only about a dozen people. A woman at the entrance led me to

his office and closed the door. When he saw me, his eyes lit up, and I believed

it was because of my clothes. Sure enough, the first thing he said was that my clothes flattered my figure. He took my hand

and sat me on the sofa, asked me some questions, and then said, "Not bad, you can come work here. The salary is this much,

and there will be some bonuses at the end of the month and year depending on the situation." I thought it sounded good, so I agreed. He hugged me, kissed me on

the cheek , and said, "Then let's get the paperwork done." He called in a lady to take me to complete the paperwork, and that's how

I started working at his company that afternoon, doing office administration work.

At noon, he asked me to have lunch with him, saying that my temperament was more suitable for a professional woman, and told me to buy a few

business suits. He even gave me 2,000 yuan to buy clothes. I never expected him to give me money

to buy clothes. In the afternoon, he asked another female employee to accompany me to buy clothes. Later, I found out why he...

I asked this female employee to go shopping with me. She knew he liked women wearing business suits, stockings, and

high heels .

His company was mostly female, and it was a trading company. The business was mainly done through connections with his friends.

The employees didn't have much to do; most were just handling orders. I worked in administration and also did his secretary work.

That night, after returning to my dorm, I told M2 that I had found a job and wouldn't be working at the nightclub anymore. That's

how I ended my nearly twenty days of working as a hostess at the nightclub. I also paid back the money M2 had given me.

At this point, I started looking for a place to live outside, since living with her wasn't convenient. M2 told me

where I could find roommates online, so I started looking for an apartment.

The next day, I officially went to work wearing my newly bought business suit. He didn't arrive at the company until noon, clearly having

been out socializing late the night before. He called me into his office and closed the door. He saw my attire, nodded

, and said it looked good, like a professional woman. He explained my work situation to me and asked me

to pay attention to my image, saying that a good image was required for his secretary. He also gave me some money to buy a cell phone and then told me

to leave. Later, I noticed that the other female employees in his company were all wearing business suits, stockings, and high heels,

almost like uniforms.

In the following days, he almost always arrived at the company close to noon, and I later learned that this was his usual practice. On

the afternoon of my third day at his company, near the end of the workday, he told me to accompany him to a business dinner that evening. I didn't know how to conduct business

dinners and was a bit clueless. After work, he drove me to a very high-end hotel for dinner. There were also

several of his friends and their female companions. When his friends saw him bring me in, they joked with him, saying that his

secretary was very beautiful. He also said that their secretaries were quite good, etc. I didn't know what to say, and then I realized that

those women were his friends' secretaries. To be honest, those women were indeed very beautiful and had great figures. At the dinner

table , we women didn't say much; it was mostly the men talking. They didn't discuss business, just

rambling on about random things. After dinner, they took us to a nightclub to sing. There, they showed their true colors as men.

They didn't hire girls to drink with them; each of them had a secretary. I thought they

wouldn't touch their secretaries like they would with the prostitutes, but that wasn't the case at all. During the drinking and singing,

they casually groped their secretaries, even more so than with the prostitutes. Their secretaries didn't seem to care that

their bosses were touching them in front of other men, even cooperating with them.

My face turned red because my boss, E, was also holding me and touching me. I didn't dare refuse.

Fortunately, E didn't do anything to me that day; he just touched me. He touched me until I was wet down there.

Partly because of his touch, and partly because seeing those beautiful women being casually

touched by their bosses in that atmosphere was stimulating.

After leaving the nightclub, E drove me back to my dorm. On the way, I wondered, is this what business

entertainment is like? What's the difference between this and working as a hostess?

While driving, he stroked my thigh, all the way to my groin. I grabbed his hand.

Suddenly, he pulled the car over to the side of the road in the dark, hugged me, and kissed me, his hands roaming over my body. I panicked a little, and

he pressed me against the passenger seat, kissing me. One of his hands had already forced its way into my underwear, and my

skirt was almost up to my waist. While kissing me, he used his fingers to thrust in and out of my genitals, and I started moaning.

My body was hot and weak, and I couldn't resist him anymore. He exposed his genitals and asked me to give him oral sex. I didn't

refuse. While I gave him oral sex, he sometimes rubbed my breasts, sometimes touched my buttocks and genitals.

I was soaking wet.

He lifted my head, got out of the car, walked to my side of the car door, pulled me out, and made me turn around. I held

onto the car window, and he lifted my short skirt from behind. I bent over, and he thrust his thick, hard penis into me from

behind. When he entered me, I moaned with stimulation. He swore as he thrust, trying to arouse me.

I didn't dare to scream loudly, but I wanted to, so I suppressed my cries. He became even more frenzied from behind, thrusting and rubbing my

breasts. Under his intense stimulation, I quickly orgasmed. Not long after my orgasm, he also ejaculated

inside me. I felt his penis convulsing inside me, and I actively tightened my grip on him. After he ejaculated and

pulled out , I tried to straighten my clothes, but he wouldn't let me. Instead, he made me kneel on the roadside grass to give him oral sex.

I didn't know what that would be like. I was almost naked, my short skirt was still up to my waist, I wasn't wearing underwear, and I was kneeling on the grass

in high heels, giving him oral sex. As he enjoyed my blowjob, he muttered to himself that it was really

exciting. We did this for about ten minutes before he let me stand up, straighten my clothes, and get into the car. I was almost

limp in the front seat. He continued to drive while stroking my thighs and unbuttoning my shirt, exposing my

breasts. I was too weak to refuse him, so I did as he pleased. He drove very slowly, and when he stopped,

I realized we weren't at my dorm. He said it was another apartment of his. I straightened my clothes a little and followed him

upstairs. On the way up, I could barely walk; he practically had to carry me. Once inside, he didn't

turn on the lights. Using the streetlights outside, he stripped me naked, threw me onto the bed, and then stripped naked himself.

That night, he was wild, and so was I. Perhaps

because , my reaction was quite strong. He was already over forty, but his energy was still boundless. I don't know

how many times we did it, until we were both exhausted on the bed, drifting off to sleep. When I woke up, it was already

noon the next day.

When we had lunch together, he noticed that my business suit, which he'd gotten very dirty the night before, had been ruined.

He personally took me to buy a new outfit, a very sexy business suit (he said it looked

sexy ). He told me I could rest in the afternoon and didn't need to go to work, then drove me back to my dorm. M2 had gone to work

, leaving me alone in the dorm. I looked for roommates online and found one quickly. After calling, we arranged

to see the room that afternoon, which happened to be convenient for me. I met the young man I was sharing the apartment with. He was from Hubei, 28 years old, and had

been here for three or four years. He worked in sales at a small company, with relatively flexible working hours. He rented a two-bedroom,

two-living-room apartment. His previous roommate had moved out after getting a boyfriend, so he needed to find someone else to

share the rent. I looked at the room and the neighborhood; it seemed pretty good. I also specifically asked him about the young man; he didn't seem like a bad person.

He got to know me, and we were both quite satisfied, so he agreed. I could move in that day; the bed and

everything , I just needed to bring my own luggage. I called M2, explained the situation

, and moved my things over that same day. Strangely, when I called M2, she didn't ask why I hadn't gone back to my dorm

the , and I didn't explain it to her either. This is probably just

the unspoken rule in this southern city—don't meddle in other people's business.

That night, M2 and I had dinner together. During dinner, I asked her if she wanted to work at a nightclub that night.

If she wasn't working, I wanted to treat her to dancing or going to a bar as a way of thanking her for taking care of me. M2 was

going to go, but then she called the manager to ask for leave. She took me to a

bar , a place where you could also go clubbing. We drank a lot there, danced wildly, and got quite drunk. Under the influence

of the alcohol, we talked a lot. She told me that this bar mainly catered to one-night stands, and many white-collar workers who came to the city

would come here looking for casual encounters when they were bored. She said she liked coming here too, unlike at nightclubs

where she was constantly being chosen by men. Here, she could make her own choices. I jokingly asked

if she'd ever looked for someone here, and she frankly told me she'd done it several times, making

me blush a little. But she didn't seem to care. I asked her why she didn't find a boyfriend, and she laughed, saying that life here was very

materialistic and cold. When she first arrived in the city, she also wanted to find a boyfriend to live with, so that living

expenses would be relatively lower. Not long after, she started dating a guy from her company, and they lived

together . She gave him everything, but she found that he was very secretive about her. They were only

naked and completely open in bed; she knew nothing about him, and he never told her anything else.

She asked him many times, but he was impatient. Finally, after a few months, they broke up, and

it was a . The guy moved out that very day. M2 was heartbroken. That same day, she came to this bar

and met a man for the first time—her first one-night stand. After her boyfriend moved out, M2's salary alone

couldn't cover the rent, so she found this young man to share the apartment with. I asked her when she started working part-time at the nightclub

, and M2 said she started shortly after breaking up with her boyfriend. I asked if she wasn't afraid of running into acquaintances. She said she was

worried , and had actually run into one once. She laughed and said that everyone here was an outsider, unlike in the mainland

where you know people everywhere. Here, so-called acquaintances are only contacted through a phone number, and if the phone number changes,

they might not be able to find you. I was curious when she mentioned running into an acquaintance, so I pressed her to tell me

who what happened.

She suddenly cursed, saying that she ran into her boss who happened to be out with a group of friends. I

was surprised and said, "What a coincidence!" She said yes, she saw the boss as soon as she entered the private room, and she turned around and

left , her heart pounding, wondering if the boss had seen her. After she came out, she told the manager that she wasn't feeling well and had to

leave, and although the manager was unhappy, she had no choice but to let her go. After she went into the room to change her clothes,

she ran into her boss as she was walking out. Luckily, she had already changed out of her uniform. Her boss asked her what she was doing there, and she hurriedly

said that her friends were having a party and had invited her over. She didn't dare to look her boss in the eye and ran away in a hurry. I

asked her if her boss said anything after that. She sighed and said she didn't dare to work at that company anymore; she felt too much

pressure. A few days later, she resigned. I asked her what she would do next, and how

long she would continue working part-time at the nightclub. She said helplessly that she would work there for a while longer.

She asked how her current job was going and whether she really didn't want to work part-time anymore. I gave a vague answer and said it was

okay, but I didn't want to work part-time for the time being because I was afraid of running into acquaintances.

That night, I didn't go to my own rented dormitory but stayed at M2. The two of us

chatted in bed for almost the entire night. When we talked about my current job, and she heard that my boss bought me nice

clothes and a cell phone, she joked that he might have a crush on me. I hit her and told

her she was talking nonsense, then asked her, "You're so pretty, have any rich bosses liked you?" She was silent for a long time before

finally saying yes. I quickly asked what happened afterward. She said they met at a nightclub; he was her

customer , and she felt good about him, as did he. At the time, she hadn't worked at the nightclub for long and didn't

have much experience. She never worked as a prostitute, but that night she went with him. He took her to a high-end hotel and booked a room.

Afterward, he told her to quit working at the nightclub, and he would support her. For the next two months, she didn't go

to work at the nightclub. Almost every two or three days, he would ask her to go to a hotel. He gave her some money, but she found that the first month was fine;

they were often together. Later, he contacted her less and less. When she called him, he always said he was busy. Later,

she found out they had broken up. After stopping for two months, she went back to work at the nightclub. After hearing

what she said, I was speechless for a long time. I thought of E. Would I end up like that too?

The next day was the weekend, and M2 took me to my new dormitory to introduce me to the door. After M2 left,

I tidied up my room by myself.

I don't know if writing like this counts as a description of the process, but if I don't, I feel I can't express

my feelings at the time, nor can I clearly explain my psychological changes. I'm worried about the post being locked.

Also, many things happened a long time ago, and my memories are unclear. What I write may differ

somewhat , but for readability, I will try my best to restore the facts. In addition, I have become more mature over the years,

and my understanding of the psychological changes at that time has become deeper, so many descriptions of my feelings at that time have been combined with my current

experiences and understanding. Because of the long time that has passed, my memory is inevitably sometimes confused, and there may be some unclear or unreasonable points

in the timeline and logic. Please bear with it. Don't think about whether it's true or not, just treat it as reading a story. I'm just venting, I always feel like I have to get it off my chest. 　　The more I write, the more it evokes my memories, the past feels vivid, like watching a movie. Now I mainly write in Word and then post it here, rather than writing it on the forum. Because of limited time and the need to recall events, it might be a bit slow. I'll post it gradually, and you can read it at your own pace. After reading it, please don't ask me if it's true or not; there's no point in answering those kinds of questions. However, you can comment on what I've written. I also enjoy reading everyone's comments, as they are a form of encouragement for my recollection.

On Monday, E still arrived at the company around noon. When he arrived, all the other employees had gone to lunch,

and I was the only one in the office eating my boxed lunch. He glanced at me and went into his office. A little while later, he called me to his

office and told me to close the door. He sat in his executive chair and told me to come to his side. I was a little embarrassed,

my face flushed. I walked over to him, and he pulled me to sit on his lap. I was wearing a business suit skirt, a short skirt that,

when I sat down, was almost up to my thighs. I subconsciously pulled the skirt down a bit. He didn't say anything.

He put one arm around my waist and touched my breasts with the other. I grabbed his hand and said, "This isn't good. We're in the office

. What if someone comes in?" He said, "What are you afraid of? If I don't let them in, they won't dare to come in." As he spoke

, he increased the pressure of his touch, saying, "Your breasts are really big." After a while, he shifted his attention to my thighs and

continued touching them. He then reached under my skirt and touched my genitals. I was already wet. He also kissed my lips,

and I reciprocated.

He touched me for a while, then asked me to come in. He exposed his penis, which was already very thick and hard. He wanted me

to kneel in front of him and give him oral sex. I pinched his penis, knelt in front of him, and gave him oral sex. He held my

head and thrust in and out, messing up my hair. This went on for about ten minutes before he ejaculated. This time, he didn't ejaculate

in my mouth; instead, he pulled out and ejaculated on my face. My face and hair were covered in his semen.

After he ejaculated, he rubbed his genitals against my face. I felt a strange sensation; although I didn't reach orgasm,

it was still very stimulating.

I cleaned the semen off my face and hair with a tissue, tidied my hair, and then he hugged and touched me for a while. He

took a paper bag from his bag and gave it to me. I asked him what it was, and he said it was

lingerie he had specially bought for me from Hong Kong yesterday. When I opened it, my face flushed. He had given me very sexy lingerie; the panties were so small they only had one

strap—I later learned they were called thongs. There was also a pair of stockings, black fishnet stockings. He said, "Take them home and wear them."

My face flushed, and I quickly straightened my clothes before leaving. When I did, all the company employees had already returned. I

hid the paper bag behind my back, too embarrassed to let them see it. After putting my things down, I went to the restroom to wash my face and touch up my makeup.

The company's business mainly involved importing electromechanical products needed in China from overseas. E had

excellent connections in both mainland China and Hong Kong, so the company's business wasn't particularly demanding. I later learned why the company's dozen or so employees were mostly women;

apparently, the company didn't need anyone to go out and solicit business. Once the boss secured an order, he

would simply assign it to an employee to follow up. The employees weren't overworked; they mostly did the socializing, just like me. Besides the order follower

, there were two accountants, someone in charge of customs import/export, a receptionist, and a driver. The company's business was quite good,

so the benefits were relatively good. I was essentially E's secretary, sitting outside his office. Everyone entering or leaving his office

had to pass in front of me. According to his instructions, if anyone came into his office, he wouldn't call out to them, and neither I

nor the other employees were allowed to disturb him.

Gradually, I learned that E's wife and children had immigrated to Canada, while he managed the business in China. E

had had affairs with almost all the female employees in the company, though everyone tacitly agreed. I often

saw female employees entering his office perfectly fine, but leaving blushing, their clothes disheveled

, and their makeup ruined. It was common for female employees to be late for work, sometimes even

missing the entire day, and no one would question them; they would simply call me to say they had a late social engagement the previous night.

The colleagues in the company generally got along well; they could talk about anything, except two things that were tacitly agreed

not to be discussed: their relationship with E and their respective business responsibilities. Everyone focused on their own tasks and didn't pry into

each other . Ironically, I had more information because I was E's secretary; many things were compiled

and then I would report to E at a later time.

I would spend every two or three days, or even every one or two weeks, going on a wild night with E in his office, hotel, or his room. Occasionally,

I would accompany him to business dinners. He didn't always require my company; these were usually business-related engagements. He would typically

bring along the female employee involved in the business, and occasionally I would join them.

The first time I accompanied him to a business dinner was when he took me and another female colleague who was tracking the deal

to meet the CEO of a state-owned enterprise in mainland China. The CEO was nearly fifty, and the colleague involved in the deal, let's call her

Ms. Liu , was 26 years old, from Northeast China, very tall, almost 170 cm, and beautiful (

all the female employees in the company were quite pretty; they were all personally selected by E). She had been with the company for over a year. The four of us

first went to a unique restaurant and ate until almost nine o'clock. While eating, E asked me to book a private room at a nightclub.

Since I started working as his secretary not long ago, I've been handling almost all these reservations. After dinner

, we went to a nightclub together. Ms. Liu and I were both dressed very sexily. E had requirements for his employees; female employees were required to

dress sexily when socializing, saying it was to arouse men's emotions. I had just joined the company and didn't have much money, so he paid for all my

clothes . He also required that not only my outerwear but also my lingerie be sexy. He gave

me several sets of very sexy lingerie, saying that a woman's taste wasn't in her outerwear but in her lingerie. So, my lingerie

gradually became very sexy. He also forbade female employees from wearing trousers to work; they had to wear skirts, and

the hem had to be above the knee. Luckily, the climate in this southern city is very good, so we could wear skirts all year round. This time, I

wore a black spaghetti strap mini-dress, a pair of thongs he gave me, black fishnet stockings, and high-heeled sandals. Ms. Liu

wore a denim outfit: a low-cut tank top under her denim jacket, and a very short denim mini-skirt—so

short I could see her underwear when she sat down. She wasn't wearing stockings and high-heeled sandals. E wanted to book

the nightclub where I used to work as a hostess. I'm generally reluctant to book that place, probably because I used to work there and I'm afraid of running into

acquaintances . I called M2 directly and asked her to book a small private room for me.

During dinner, I sensed that Ms. Liu and the client were quite familiar with each other and seemed very friendly. This client

was also familiar with E, so we weren't reserved during dinner or at the nightclub. After we arrived at the nightclub,

I was led to a private room by M2. E noticed that M2 and I were quite familiar and specifically asked about our relationship.

I introduced M2 to E. This was my first time back at this nightclub since leaving, but

this time I was there to spend money. Since we were a couple, we didn't call any hostesses. I accompanied E, and Ms. Liu accompanied the other hostess.

There was one client. We only stayed at the nightclub for two or three hours. E and the client spent just

a few minutes to reach an agreement on a few key points of the project. Ms. Liu and I were just drinking and singing with them.

Ms. Liu actively accompanied the client. During the party, E didn't hold back and touched me. Under

his influence, the client gradually loosened up and started touching Ms. Liu. Ms. Liu actively

cooperated with him.

That time in the private room, E not only touched my breasts, but also put his hand inside my skirt and touched my genitals. I was wearing

thongs, and his hand touched my genitals as soon as it was inside my skirt. When he touched me, I secretly glanced at

Ms. Liu and the client. I saw Ms. Liu sitting in the client's lap, her arms around his neck. The client had one hand

inside her collar touching her breasts, and the other hand was stroking her thigh. They were kissing and being intimate, and they

didn't have time to look at us. E pulled me into the restroom of the private room. There, he demanded

oral sex, lifted my skirt, and pushed my thong aside. I held onto the toilet seat while he fucked

me from behind. During this time, I remembered the last time I masturbated a client in the same private room's restroom.

I quickly climaxed, and he ejaculated inside me during my orgasm. When we came out, we saw

Ms. Liu straddling the client, the two of them tightly embracing, the client's hands

roaming . Shortly after we left, they also went into the restroom. Back in the private room, E and I were singing together, embracing. Then M2

came in; she was there to toast E. E, without any hesitation, acted like an old friend, pulling her into

his arms caressing her ample buttocks. M2 didn't resist, responding

to him, only jokingly calling out to me, "Look how naughty your husband is!" I glared at her, while

E laughed heartily. Then the manager came in to offer a toast. She recognized me and was also familiar with E; E was a regular there

. I was recommended to E by the manager. When the manager toasted, she asked E if my recommendation was good. E, with one arm

around M2 and the other around me, said, "Not bad, not bad, both of them are good." The manager, M2, and E

then left after a playful, affectionate exchange. E, still holding me, said, "Your classmate is quite something." I asked her, "Why didn't you book

her table before?" E said he hadn't noticed before.

Ms. Liu and the client came out of the restroom hand-in-hand; her face was flushed. I knew

what they had done in the restroom.

After leaving the nightclub, E drove the client to the hotel. After parking, E took a leather bag from the car and

gave it to Ms. Liu, telling her to take it and escort the client back to his room. Then we drove away. I stupidly

asked E, "Aren't we waiting for Ms. Liu?"

E didn't take me back to my dorm; instead, he took me to his apartment. Once inside, he immediately lay down on

the bed and told me to take a shower first. While I was showering, he entered completely naked. I helped him bathe,

while his hands groped my body. He carried me to the bed, spread my legs, and kissed my genitals.

The intense stimulation made me wet and moan loudly. He turned me over and made me kneel on the bed. I thought he

was going to do it from behind, but to my surprise, he wet his penis with my fluids and inserted it into my anus. I

cried out, You've got it wrong, not there!" But he said, "I'm going to fuck you here today." He forcefully thrust into my

anus and started pumping. I felt a swelling, a urge to defecate, and it was the first time

a man had done it there. I cried out, not from excitement, but from pain. He was excited, saying how tight

it was He ejaculated shortly after, inside my anus. When he pulled out, my anus felt burning. I

lay limp on the bed, too weak to clean myself down there. He lay beside me, touching me, and asked if I'd

ever , and how it felt. I said it was my first time, and it hurt and felt uncomfortable. He said it was called "

gj," and that I'd like it in the future. I told him not to do it again, that it was uncomfortable.

We lay there talking, and he continued to caress me. I asked him why he was touching me like that in the private room, and how embarrassing it would be if the

client saw. He said that as long as men can have fun together, anything is possible. I realized that he

was touching me in front of the client to show them, to get them to do the same to their female companions—what he

called colluding with the corrupt." I asked him why he didn't hire prostitutes to accompany the client, but instead had company employees. He told me

that some clients didn't like prostitutes, and that it wasn't good to have outsiders present when discussing business. I asked him if he'd been with Ms. Liu

, and he laughed and said, "Of course I have," adding that she was very seductive and would make the client ecstatic tonight.

When I heard him say that, I felt myself getting wet again, and I could feel his erection.

He felt my reaction as he touched my genitals, and whispered in my ear, "You're more seductive than her, I like it."

He then kissed me hard on the lips, his fingers moving inside me. I started moaning again. He continued

to swear as his fingers moved, demanding answers from me. For example, he asked who had slept with me the first time, how old I was,

how many with, etc. He also insulted me, calling me a slut, a whore, suitable to be fucked by men, suitable to sell myself, etc.

Amidst his insults and the swaying of his fingers, I orgasmed. During my orgasm, I shouted that I was a slut,

a whore…

The next day before noon, he did it to me again, ejaculating on my face and genitals. He said he liked seeing

his semen on my elegant face, it gave him a thrill. When we arrived at the company together at noon,

Ms. Liu hadn't arrived yet.

His desire was very strong; sometimes when I delivered documents to his office, he would touch me when he felt like it,

sometimes making me wet down there. Because my desk is right outside his office door, everyone entering or leaving his

office has to pass by me. Many times I've seen other female employees go into his office for a long time,

often coming out blushing. Since I've had experience with him in the office, I obviously know

what they did with him there. I don't know why, but I feel a thrill. Sometimes I secretly touch myself and

find myself very wet.

Sometimes I hesitate, wondering if I should continue writing. I believe many are upright people who disdain my

actions and thoughts. But I also believe there are many

people who share the same, or more or less, thoughts and behaviors as me. It's just that, as a friend said, I dare to write it down. Maybe in

some people's eyes I'm a bad woman; let others say what they will. Sometimes I just want to vent, but I hesitate...

It's time to vent here...

I'm conflicted...

Many friends have left messages wanting to get to know me or have further conversations. To be honest, I won't get to know anyone who

knows so much about my past. After all, some of my thoughts and actions can't be completely laid

bare. People still need to protect themselves. So, I apologize to those friends.

Finally, about four or five months after I joined his company, something happened. I'll explain what happened later.

During this time, I found out that E and M2 had slept together. He told me this during one of his encounters with me. He

said that once when he went to a nightclub with friends, he ordered M2 to accompany him. Later that night, he brought her to

this , and they spent the whole night together on the same bed. As he spoke, his hand was still touching me, while I

was imagining what it was like with M2. My already dry genitals became wet again. He sensed

my physical change and asked if I found it exciting when he and M2 did it. I was too embarrassed to answer, but

I became even wetter. He spread my legs and entered me again, talking about

what he and M2 did to arouse me. For some reason, I suddenly asked him who was better, me or M2. He said, "You two are both

beautiful and sexy." As he spoke, he ejaculated hard inside me.

During this time, I also slept with my roommate, F. Sometimes when I returned to the dorm late, I would

often find women's shoes outside F's room. Sometimes I would fall asleep first and hear him bringing women back. The room

wasn't soundproof, and I could clearly hear the passionate sounds coming from his room. I had never seen what the woman he brought

home looked like, and I was always curious to see what she was like. Finally, one weekend

morning, while I was washing up, I saw a very attractive woman come out of his room. She looked to be around 30 years old, with

a round face, fashionable curly hair, and a pretty short dress. As she changed into her high heels at the door, F was

beside his hand on her waist, and he even touched her full buttocks. She grabbed his hand. I was too embarrassed

to peek anymore and hid my head back in the bathroom. That day, I went to see M1. She lived in the factory's dormitory,

eight people to a room, very crowded. She introduced me to her boyfriend, a man in his thirties, her department

manager, from Hunan, not very tall. She told me that she was planning to rent an apartment with her boyfriend.

In the afternoon, I felt very tired when I returned to the dormitory and slept until almost dark. When I got up, I saw that F had almost finished cooking, and

I jokingly asked him, "Why isn't your girlfriend with you?" He smiled sheepishly and invited me

to dinner. I didn't want to cook or go downstairs to eat, so I agreed. We'd often

eaten dinner together before. During dinner, I jokingly mentioned that his girlfriend was very pretty and asked what she did. He then

sheepishly admitted he didn't have a girlfriend; the woman was someone he'd just met at a bar, a primary school teacher, and her husband

lived in mainland China. I didn't dare ask any further, only to find out that the women he brought home weren't the same ones each time.

That night, after dinner, he invited me to go to a bar by the sea. I joked that my presence wouldn't

prevent him from having romantic encounters. He said, "What are you talking about? We're just going to relax." I didn't refuse and went

with to a lively bar by the sea. At the bar, we jokingly talked about how he

met other women at bars, and he didn't hide anything from me. During our walks at the bar and together,

our bodies occasionally touched, sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally. When we walked through crowded areas, he even took my hand.

After returning to my dorm that night and washing up, I lay in bed unable to fall asleep. It might be due to the alcohol, or perhaps from

sleeping too much in the afternoon. I got up, still in my nightgown, and sat on the sofa in the living room to watch TV. During this time, F,

wearing only his underwear and shirtless, went to the bathroom. As he passed the living room, he asked if I couldn't sleep either. Seeing he wasn't dressed,

I didn't dare look him in the eye. After a while, he came out wearing a tank top and sat on the sofa with me to watch TV.

I secretly noticed his underwear was bulging, and my heart raced. I thought about going back to my room but didn't move. We chatted intermittently

while watching TV. The living room lights were off, only the TV light casting

intermittent shadows, creating an atmosphere of lust. I mustered my courage and stood up, intending to break the silence and return to my

room. Just as I stood up, he suddenly reached under my nightgown from behind, grabbed my stomach, and

pulled me towards him. I lost my balance and ended up sitting on his bare thighs. His hands were already gripping and roughly

kneading my full breasts. I couldn't help but moan.

Once the paper was torn, there were no more inhibitions between us. At first, I resisted a little, but when he kissed

my lips, I started to take the initiative. Soon he undressed me, and I collapsed on the sofa watching him strip

naked . When he revealed his erect penis, I felt a gush of fluid. I gave him oral sex, and he

excitedly thrust in and out of my mouth. We kissed, and he carried me to his room. He threw me onto his

bed, and I lay there helplessly with my eyes closed. I didn't see him get on his bed for a long time. I opened my eyes and saw him

standing by the bed looking at me. I was too embarrassed to ask him what he was looking at. He touched me and said, "You're really full-figured, and your skin

is so white." For some reason, I suddenly asked him, "How do I compare to the women you've been with?" He spread my

legs and thrust into me forcefully, saying, "Fuck you is even better." I was stimulated by him and cooperated with him. Soon, we both

reached orgasm. After the climax, I sobered up a bit and felt a little embarrassed. His hand was still touching me, so I

pushed him away and said I was going back to my room. He tried to stop me, but I insisted on going back to my own room.

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