The Tragedy of Indulgence: The Story of My First Girlfriend

Every time I watch those romantic dramas, I'm sometimes moved

to tears . I know I cry because I've gained many women, but lost something beautiful in my heart—

that pure, innocent feeling. Although I now casually tell my friends, "Women are

just like !" deep down I know that some things, once lost, can never be regained.
First love, first affection—these initial things are feelings born without any material factors.

These feelings, accompanied by a wildness, propel a man's maturity. A man changing women is like being trapped in a walled city; a man

clinging to one woman hopes to have more, while a man tired of changing women envies those

men who may be forced into monogamous relationships. It's a cycle, an endless loop.
Speaking of changing girlfriends, I always think of Xiao Yang, because she was my first girlfriend,

the woman I was with for three years. Xiao Yang was a virgin; she thought she could keep me with her sincere love, but she didn't know that when

a man's wildness is unleashed, that madness can erase all memories and conscience.
Every time I lie alone in bed, I always think of Xiao Yang. The main reason I replaced her was

because I was too rough with my second girlfriend. Although I eventually used the excuse of "my family doesn't approve" to replace

her, I knew very well in my heart that I was young and lustful, and I was forced

to make the choice to replace her because I knew that if I didn't replace her, she would have

replaced me after she found out the truth, and the ending would have been the same.
Xiao Yang and I were classmates in college. At the beginning of college, I didn't think about finding

a girlfriend because my family was poor, and dating required money. I didn't have money and was a little inferior, so I didn't think about

dating. I didn't expect that Xiao Yang would take the initiative to express her love, and I couldn't refuse. I tasted

the tenderness of a woman in college.
I'm 181cm tall and love playing basketball, so I often appear at school basketball games.

Because of my decent jumping ability—I can easily jump over the rim with one wrist—I often

block shots when opponents go for layups. Back then, I was insecure and enjoyed the applause from the sidelines.
I'm kind of handsome, and in a sports uniform, I look very sunny and popular with girls. However,

while these girls in college liked me, they also knew my family wasn't well-off, so they only admired and

cheered; no one ever approached me. I was too lazy to bother, so I remained single.
I remember one noon during my sophomore year, I was going to the cafeteria with my lunchbox when suddenly the school's loudspeaker

announced a sweet voice: "Yang** from **Department**, Class **, is dedicating a song—Waiting for You—to Zhang** from *Department**, Class **,

and wishing him a happy birthday."
As the song started playing, my roommates all said to me, "You're lucky, this girl has

a crush on you..." Listening to the song, I remembered that Xiao Yang was a cheerleader for our opponents—the Business Administration department—during the inter-departmental basketball game.

That time, I scored 31 points, helping our department defeat them. After

the game, a girl from the Business Administration cheerleading team came up to me and said, "You're amazing! My

name is Xiao Yang, from Business Administration, and I really admire you." Because I didn't want to date in college, I only said,

"Thanks, your department played well today too," and turned away, leaving her standing

there disappointed. I never contacted her again.
Hearing the song Xiao Yang requested for me touched me deeply. Although I don't celebrate my birthday (partly because my family is struggling

financially and I can't afford a birthday party), having a beautiful girl wish me a happy birthday still satisfied

my vanity. I thought, since she wished me a happy birthday, I couldn't just not thank her, could I?

What should I give this girl in return? I was also troubled because I was short of money.
While I was hesitating about what gift to give this girl in return, my phone suddenly received a text

message : "I'm waiting for you downstairs at your dorm, Xiao Yang." Worried that Xiao Yang

would be waiting in the boys' dorm and I'd become the subject of gossip, I quickly ran downstairs after receiving the message.
When I met Xiao Yang, I felt

a little I said, "Thank you for requesting a song for me today. I really didn't expect you to do that, I'm so touched."
Xiao Yang smiled and said, "Don't be so polite. I just knew it was your birthday today, so I quickly requested

a song for you. Also, based on your height, I bought you a suit. I'm going back to get it now, come

with me to try it on, and if it doesn't fit, you can exchange it."
I was very touched, but since we were strangers, I always felt embarrassed to accept gifts from a girl. I said, "This

isn't very nice... You shouldn't spend so much. I have the clothes, I appreciate your kindness."
Xiao Yang said, "It's all..." "I've already bought it, there's no point in refusing now, come with me!"
I realized I'd already bought the clothes, and refusing now would be too hurtful. So I

said, "I don't know what to say now that you're doing this."
Xiao Yang smiled slightly and said, "Then don't say anything, just come with me!"
So Xiao Yang generously led me to her dormitory building. As I was about to enter the girls' dormitory,

the gatekeeper saw it was a boy and immediately said, "Who are you looking for? Male students aren't allowed in the girls' dormitory!"

Xiao Yang then smiled and said to the gatekeeper, "Aunt Li, this is my cousin. Come upstairs with me to move some things, he'll be

down in a bit!" Aunt Li, seeing it was Xiao Yang, waved me in.
There was no one else in Xiao Yang's dormitory. I asked Xiao Yang, "Where are the others in the dormitory?"
Xiao Yang said, "They went to see a movie, it's just me now."
Hearing this, my heart pounded. A girl saying to a man, "It's just me today

," contains so much meaning. No matter when, any man who hears this will think of

one thing—sex!
"Here, try this on and see if it fits." Xiao Yang took out the suit she bought for me and had me try it on. The suit fit quite well

overall , showing that Xiao Yang had put a lot of effort into it. She said, "Button it up so I can take another look." So she

started buttoning my suit jacket. As she buttoned it for me, scenes from many

TV dramas wives would straighten their husbands' clothes and help them tie their ties before they went to work, especially her subtle feminine charm.

The fragrance of her body made me instinctively reach out and hug Xiao Yang.
After I hugged her, she trembled slightly in my arms, as if hesitant, yet

determined . She also reached out and hugged me back. Seeing this, I lowered my head and kissed her. Her small mouth was so pure,

accompanied by the faint fragrance of her face and her soft tongue. I couldn't control my arousal.
Xiao Yang was wearing a black dress. While I was hugging her, I had already touched her soft

buttocks , which filled me with endless anticipation for touching her. So

I reached my hand inside her dress, wanting to touch her private parts. When I entered her panties, Xiao Yang involuntarily crossed her legs

, blocking my hand. Feeling that my hand was blocked by her crossed legs, she

slowly her legs slightly to cooperate. I finally touched her vulva and pubic hair.
Wearing sportswear, I easily pulled out my penis. I lifted her skirt and

put it directly into her panties. She trembled slightly but didn't make a sound. I was incredibly daring at that moment, so I put Xiao Yang on

the bed, took off her panties, and, breathing heavily, wanted to have sex with her. Because Xiao Yang's vagina was too tight,

and I had no experience, I rubbed against the vaginal opening for a long time without being able to penetrate. Finally, I felt a small opening,

and with a forceful thrust, Xiao Yang let out a soft moan, and I entered her body.
Because it was my first time entering a woman's body, I felt extremely excited. I had only thrust less than 10

times when I felt like I was about to ejaculate. Because I was afraid of the girl getting pregnant, I suddenly pulled

my penis , shooting it directly onto the floor of their dormitory. At the same time, I saw

a little bit of blood on my penis; Xiao Yang had lost her virginity.
After I finished, Xiao Yang quickly put on her underwear, nestled her head against my chest, and said with a smile, "I'm yours

now!" I hugged Xiao Yang tightly, feeling grateful to God for being so good to me, giving me such a wonderful

girl.
Later, after graduating from university, I naturally stayed in S city with Xiao Yang. Life was tough for recent graduates

, with low salaries, but with Xiao Yang by my side every night and making love with her every day, I still felt

that life was fun and happy, until Xiao Zhao appeared and disrupted my life...
Xiao Zhao was my colleague. At that time, I had just been promoted to a junior manager, and Xiao Zhao was also a manager. We were at the same

level. Because our responsibilities were different, we sometimes had to cooperate on tasks. Since I always wanted to maintain good

interpersonal relationships , I always put my heart into helping Xiao Zhao's department and did

a good job. Once, Xiao Zhao smiled and said to me, "You're so thoughtful. Any woman who gets you is really

lucky ." When she said this, her eyes were a little misty. My wolfish nature told me that this girl

had fallen for me.
When a man admires a woman, he will use his imagination based on how much she likes him. For example, if

a woman is cold to you, it is difficult for you to fully imagine what it would feel like to have sex with her in bed. At most, you can look at the

woman and imagine what her vagina might look like. That's about it. A man's imagination is

based on the woman and his own potential. So, when Xiao Zhao had feelings for me, I naturally

thought of one thing every time I saw her: "Wouldn't it be great if I were on top of her?"
Later, when I saw Xiao Zhao, I imagined the scene of fucking her. Although I kept my mouth shut, this

thought made me unconsciously more attentive to helping her at work. Finally, one day, Xiao Zhao was working overtime, and her girlfriend

Xiao Yang happened to be away on a business trip. I was emboldened and said to Xiao Zhao, "It's so late, let's have dinner together, and then we

can go back to work together." Xiao Zhao agreed. During dinner, Xiao Zhao asked me, "Your girlfriend Xiao Yang is

so good to you. I see that your clothes are always very neat."
I pretended to be sad and said, "Others think we're good, but actually we're incompatible and it's almost

over ..." Men, pay attention: if a man wants to sleep with a woman, and you still have a girlfriend, you must

tell this woman that you and your girlfriend are about to give up. Otherwise, don't expect to sleep with this girl. You

need to give her hope so that you can succeed.
Sure enough, Xiao Zhao was surprised that I would say such a thing. She said, "You two seem quite well-matched."
I said, "What you see is all an illusion. We've been sleeping in separate beds for a long time now, almost half a year." (

This mainly to tell her that I was clean and hadn't slept with any other women recently, otherwise girls would think I was dirty because

I'd been sleeping with other women.)
Xiao Zhao laughed and said, "Then you must be having a hard time!"
I said, "It's nothing, I don't feel anything anymore. Even if we were lying next to each other, I wouldn't think about that kind of thing."
After hearing this, Xiao Zhao didn't say anything, but looked at me and smiled obediently. I could read longing in her smile.
Back at the company, since she was the only one in her department working overtime, I felt that her eyes told me she hoped we

would have a story. On the way back to the company, I deliberately walked behind her, looking at Xiao Zhao's pert buttocks, and couldn't help but

think about the scene of Xiao Zhao being penetrated from behind. So I took her to the office and lingered there.
Seeing that I didn't want to leave, Xiao Zhao smiled and said, "Aren't you going back to work overtime too?"
I said, "Being with you makes me feel very peaceful, so I don't want to leave. I want to stay a little longer."
Upon hearing this, Xiao Zhao blushed slightly, and her eyes softened. I thought she would agree then,

but instead, she said, "You have a girlfriend. It's not good for others to see you here. You should

go back quickly."
At that moment, I was controlled by lust and had completely forgotten about my girlfriend, Xiao Yang. I said, "I just don't want to leave."
Seeing my reaction, Xiao Zhao could only laugh and say, "Then you stay here. I'll go find another office. You

can stay here and relax, haha."
Xiao Zhao stood up, picked up her laptop, and prepared to leave her department's office.

How could ? So I just hugged her. She put her laptop back on the table and said, "Don't

do this , you have a girlfriend..." I said, "For you, I can find someone else, really."
Hearing this, Xiao Zhao's resistance softened. I turned around and looked at their office.

The curtains were drawn. Besides, Xiao Zhao and I were the only two working overtime on this floor. So I let go of her, went to turn off

the lights , and came back to hug her again. She symbolically refused one more time, but then stopped resisting.
So I took off her skirt, touched her pussy with my hand, it was very wet, then took out my penis, put her

on the desk, pulled Xiao Zhao's panties down to her knees, lifted her legs, and inserted

it . Xiao Zhao sat on the desk, moaning softly as I fucked her, and I felt very excited too. When I felt I

was about to ejaculate, I pulled out my penis and ejaculated directly on the ground.
Xiao Zhao is a bit of a slut, because when I ejaculated outside, when I held my penis,

I felt that my penis and pubic hair were covered in sticky, wet fluid.
Seeing that I had pulled out my penis, Xiao Zhao quickly pulled up her underwear. She chuckled and said, "You're so naughty!"
Seeing that she didn't blame me, I felt relieved and smiled back, "I couldn't help it, you're just too attractive to me,

I couldn't resist."
Xiao Zhao wasn't a virgin, but because she was very wet, it was the first time I had experienced the beauty of a woman other than Xiao Yang.

That night, lying in bed, looking at Xiao Yang's familiar furry toy beside me, my mind was filled with

guilt towards Xiao Yang. I wished I could turn back time so I wouldn't have touched Xiao Zhao.
Two weeks later, with the Spring Festival approaching, the company was about to close for the holidays. My girlfriend, Xiao Yang, was still away on a business trip. Xiao Zhao

said to me, "Brother Zhang, I'm going back to my hometown. Could you help me pack my things tonight?" I understood immediately. That

night , after work, I went straight to Xiao Zhao's dorm room. She lived alone.

That night, we made love like crazy. I fucked her a total of eight times, no exaggeration, a total of eight times. Because Xiao Zhao's body

was so fair, seeing such a fair body being pressed down by me and moaning made me want her even more. And every time she

finished, I would get hard again soon after. She would have to take off her underwear and thermal underwear again. That night,

I repeatedly tormented her, but she cooperated the whole time without uttering a single word of protest. As long as I wanted it, she would completely

cooperate .
When Xiao Zhao got up in the morning, she picked up her things and prepared to go to the station to take the bus home. Suddenly, she hugged me and cried,

"Actually, I don't want to leave. I want to stay with you, but you have a girlfriend here. For your sake, I can only

go back alone, sob sob sob..."
I hugged Xiao Zhao, feeling conflicted. I could only comfort her, saying, "This takes time.

Don't rush. I'll call you later." Xiao Zhao could only agree and obediently went home.
After seeing Xiao Zhao off, I rushed back to the apartment Xiao Yang and I rented. I knew my penis

was covered the fluid Xiao Zhao had released during our encounter last night, so I went to the bathroom to wash it. The cold water stung

, and when I looked closely, I was shocked to find my penis was injured. The foreskin

around was swollen, and there were some tears inside the foreskin with faint traces of blood. I quickly

washed it with water. Just then, my phone rang. It was my girlfriend, Xiao Yang. She happily said on the phone, "

Honey , I'm back from my business trip today! You've suffered so much lately!" "I'll treat you well tonight..."
I was completely stunned when I received Xiao Yang's call. My penis was injured, and

Xiao Yang liked to suck on my penis for a while before sex, which made it impossible for me to avoid

the injury. My penis was also very painful to the touch, so I dared not have sex anymore, otherwise my penis might be ruined.

The panic and regret I felt at that moment were indescribable. I thought to myself, if I hadn't

had sex with Xiao Zhao a few less times last night, I might be fine today. I really hated myself for indulging in Xiao Zhao's body last night,

which led to my current predicament.
Xiao Yang returned from his business trip that afternoon. I quickly went to work, making an excuse that I was busy, and then called Xiao Yang from the office landline at 10

pm to prove that I was indeed at the company. Xiao Yang said with concern:

"Honey, you've worked hard. You go ahead with your work, I'm going to sleep."
I quickly agreed, and didn't dare go back until 1 a.m. that night. When I got back, Xiao Yang was already fast asleep

. I avoided the ordeal of trying to lull her to sleep through sex that night. The next morning, I got up at 6 a.m.

Xiao Yang hugged me and said, "Honey, I want it."
I said, "I was too tired last night, we'll do it later. The company is pressuring me, I have to go..."
So, I endured it day by day, hoping my penis would heal quickly, but the injury was too severe. Although

my penis had recovered somewhat, it still hurt at the slightest touch. Finally, on the fourth day, Xiao Yang sensed something was wrong. She

finally got angry. She was furious. She said to me, "I sense something's wrong with you. Have you fallen for someone else?"
I quickly replied, "No, don't overthink it."
Xiao Yang stared at me and said, "Then why haven't you touched me for four days?"
I said, "I'm just too tired!"
She cried and said, "I don't think so. You used to want me every day, but now you're acting very strange, you know?

Don't lie to me anymore. If you've got the guts, then take me now..."
I was helpless because my penis couldn't have sex, and if Xiao Yang knew I had betrayed her, she would be

heartbroken . I was terrified, and at the same time, I thought of Xiao Zhao's white body and her tears. It was

a very contradictory dilemma.
I had no choice but to steel myself and tell Xiao Yang, "My family doesn't approve of our relationship, so

let's break up!" Xiao Yang cried even harder, for half an hour. She wiped away her tears and told me

she agreed to break up. I could only remain silent because I really couldn't say anything.
Because Xiao Yang and I both wanted to leave our former love nest, Xiao Yang moved out first and left.

Two months later, she married someone else. When Xiao Yang moved out, I moved out too. When

Xiao Zhao found out, she rushed over from her hometown that very night and insisted on living with me. And that's how

my second relationship began.
Every time I'd had sex with a woman a few times and felt my penis was about to hurt, I would think of my first

girlfriend Xiao Yang. While enjoying new women, I lost

the opportunity I could have had to stay with my one and only woman in the city. The scenery outside the city walls was beautiful, but the chance to go inside was gone forever. It was a gain, and also

a loss.
[The End
]

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