【My Story with Shadows】

I first met Ying in February 2008. At that time, I was on a business trip in Ying's city for

about two months. In the evenings, when I was bored, I would browse QQ and chat rooms to kill time, wasting

my time. That day, I was in a bad mood and drank some alcohol alone in the hotel before going back to my room to sleep. I don't know if it was

the alcohol or my physical needs, but I kept tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep. After showering, I turned on my computer and logged into QQ.

Seeing that there were few people online, I was about to close my laptop when I heard a notification sound. Someone had added

me.

Opening the message, I saw a 36-year-old woman whose profile said her name was "Ying," a university

professor, a graduate of an American university, and that she wanted to chat with a man from Beijing. Looking at Ying's profile, she seemed very

genuine, so I clicked the "accept" button. A while later, Ying sent a message, the first thing being: "Are you

from Beijing?"

I answered affirmatively. In our conversation, I learned that Ying was a music professor at a university in this city,

with a relatively outgoing personality, but I sensed a lot of inner pressure. Two hours passed in the blink of 　　an eye. I was

captivated by Ying's wit and erudition, while Ying was impressed by my humor and maturity. It felt like we had known each other for ages. Because I had a meeting the next morning, I said goodbye to Ying and went offline to sleep. 　　The next day, after the meeting, it was already noon. Hungry, I found a small restaurant outside the hotel to eat, then returned to the hotel to go online. When I logged into QQ, Ying's avatar kept flashing. Opening it, I saw her messages, each one expressing deep affection. Seeing that it was a message from the morning, I replied, left my phone number, and then closed the computer to sleep. 　　I was awakened by the phone ringing. It was Ying calling, inviting me to chat online. For the next two days, we poured our hearts out online, and I gained Ying's approval through my great care and encouragement. I learned that Ying was raising her child alone; her son was in middle school and boarded at school, not coming home often. 　　That afternoon, I called Ying and said I wanted to visit her, but she said it wasn't convenient at the moment, as she had guests at home—her niece and her boyfriend. I told her I didn't have any friends in the city besides her, and after a few more words, I hung up. Half an hour later, Ying called me and invited me to her house for dinner that evening. 　　At 7:30 pm, I arrived at the address Ying had given me. After getting downstairs, I called her and, following her directions, knocked on the door of apartment 301 on the third floor. Ying, who opened the door, seemed even younger than in the video. 　　Without any pleasantries, she let me in. I felt a little awkward (it was my first time entering someone else 's home). After exchanging some questions that I still don't understand, we finally bridged the gap through our shared experiences. 　　She said her computer seemed to have some problems these past few days, booting up very slowly. She took me to her bedroom to take a look at the computer. After I turned it on, it was indeed quite slow. After it booted up, I noticed that many of the icons in the lower right corner were set to start randomly, which was consuming memory. So, I helped her adjust the settings she could, and optimized the ones she couldn't. After a while, I restarted the computer, and it was much faster. 　　Ying sat beside me the whole time, watching. After I finished setting it up, Ying praised me and asked me to teach her. I carefully explained some basic computer knowledge to her and even wrote down some steps on paper. Ying said that no one would be willing to teach someone who knows nothing so seriously. 　　After saying that, she told me to play while she went to take a shower. I played on the computer out of boredom, feeling uncomfortable . 　　Ten minutes later, I heard the water stop, and I quickly opened a webpage to read the news. Ying came over wearing a nightgown and stood behind me, gently hugging me. Ying's hair was a little wet after showering, and I could feel her breasts pressed tightly against my back. My heart was beating fast, but I didn't do anything because I didn't know what to do. Ying hugged me and kissed my face; I could feel her need. I said I was going to take a shower and that I should sit here for a while. I think I hid in the shower room; my feelings at that moment were very complicated. 　　In the shower, I heard Ying's voice telling me to use that towel and that something was there. After an internal struggle and the shower, my mind gradually cleared. I washed myself, dried off the water, and got dressed. Ying had prepared pajamas, but I didn't wear them, saying I was already dressed and didn't want to change. Ying came up and hugged me, and we fell onto the bed in each other's arms. 　　After a long kiss, Ying helped me take off my clothes, and I helped her take off her pajamas. Ying's underwear wasn't flashy or sexy; it showed that she was frugal in her life, just like her simple and clean bed. Gently removing Ying's underwear, I felt a mature woman's aura about her, mature without being pretentious, everything about her felt natural. Ying's skin was very white, not very tight but also without any excess fat. 　　Although she had breastfed, her breasts hadn't sagged; her nipples were like grapes, relatively large, and a darker color. Gently stroking Ying's breasts, Ying closed her eyes slightly. When my palm covered Ying's mons pubis from her lower abdomen, I felt her tremble slightly. Ying's pubic hair wasn't sparse, but it was evenly distributed. 　　At this moment, Ying's labia were slightly swollen, and some fluid flowed from her vagina. I started kissing , and after a while, Ying began guiding my penis into her body. Just as we reached the entrance, we both stopped, looked at each other, and smiled. Ying said she would get a condom later, and I nodded. Ying took one from the cabinet and put it on me, and I began to ride her. 　　Ying's moans were very loud; thankfully, the computer music was on, otherwise the neighbors would definitely have heard. After a while, Ying asked if I was tired, and I said I was fine. Seeing that I was covered in sweat, Ying told me to lie down. She sat on top of me and moved up and down. Watching Ying's breasts bounce in front of me, my heart became even more uncontrollable, and Ying's moans grew louder and louder. 　　I rolled over and pinned Ying beneath me, thrusting in and out shallowly and deeply, whispering sweet nothings to her. Seeing that Ying's vaginal fluid had flowed out and soaked a large area of the sheets, I felt it was about time and began to thrust vigorously. Ying's face became much rosier, and her moans rose and fell, but her hips responded to my movements in perfect harmony. Just as I was about to stop, Ying gasped and said, "Don't stop." 　　Encouraged by this, I thrust even harder. As the speed of my thrusts increased, Ying's moans grew louder and louder. When I suddenly penetrated deep inside her and stopped, Ying's voice abruptly stopped. We clung to each other on the bed for a long time, not wanting to separate. After washing up a bit, I leaned against the bed, and Ying buried her head in my chest.

Our conversations have become completely natural, ranging from sex to life, from life to work,

and back to sex again. I also learned about Ying's pressures. It turns out that after getting married, Ying went to study in the US, and after

returning to China she taught at a university in this city. Her married life was alright.

However, with her husband's passing, she was burdened with over 100,000 yuan

in debt after spending all her savings on his medical treatment (her husband had uremia). She raised her son alone, and now the debt is mostly gone.

I was moved by Ying's story, and I couldn't sleep while holding her, talking for a long time. When Ying realized I was aroused again

, she laughed happily, and we started having fun again. This time, Ying was even more unrestrained and joyful, as if

releasing all the pressure and loneliness she had accumulated over the years.

Because I had already ejaculated once, I lasted even longer. When Ying reached her climax, she used various

words, sometimes even I couldn't understand what she was saying. After our climax, we fell asleep in each other's arms.

The early autumn weather was no longer as sweltering as in the height of summer. When I woke up,

Ying was no longer beside me. I glanced at my watch on the bedside table; it was almost noon. Since I had no meetings that day, and it was

raining , I didn't rush to get up. Leaning against the headboard, I looked around Ying's room. The furnishings were simple

but clean: a desk, a piano, and a computer—that was all.

Seeing this reminded me of Ying's life, and I felt a pang of regret and sorrow. Just as I was lost in thought, a

fragrant aroma wafted in, and I took a couple of deep breaths. Ying drifted in with the scent. "Lazybones, the sun's already

high , aren't you up yet?"

Ying's words interrupted my thoughts. Hearing her voice felt so warm and familiar, like an older sister calling

her younger brother for dinner—so natural and gentle. I smiled. "I'll get up soon," I said, stretching

, putting on my shorts, and getting out of bed. A cool breeze made me shiver.

I became much more alert, realizing it was autumn after all.

Holding a freshly lit cigarette between my fingers, I stood by the window, gazing out at the raindrops falling from the sky, lost in thought as I watched

the hurried pedestrians and the occasional honking of buses. "Dinner's ready, little brother," Ying's voice was truly

pleasant, perhaps from frequent vocal practice. I responded softly and went to the bathroom.

When I came out after getting dressed, the table was already laden with all sorts of dishes—this

was the source of the aroma. Exhausted from last night's intense activity, I didn't hold back seeing so much delicious food

and wolfed it down. Ying kept smiling as I watched, praising her cooking.

She said I was sweet-talking, but I knew that Ying's heart was even sweeter than my words. What could I do besides sweet talk and

passionate sex? Sigh!

After clearing the table with Ying, I returned to the living room, leaned back on the sofa, lit a cigarette, and realized I had a particular craving

for cigarettes . Ying came over and sat beside me, saying, "Smoking is bad for your health. You should smoke less." Hearing Ying mention health

, I realized the fear she harbored about her illness. It had shattered a happy family,

taken a young woman's husband, left a toddler without a father, burdened a wealthy

family with heavy debt, and forced a physically healthy woman to endure the pain of sexual deprivation.

Perhaps some women would say, "I don't have sex, I don't have a problem!" But those are just lies to deceive children.

What woman doesn't yearn for sex? Not only do I not believe it, but I believe no one would. I stubbed out my cigarette and gently

pulled Ying into my arms. I wanted to offer her a strong shoulder, a warm chest, at least for now, I

could give her safety, joy, and happiness. I don't know if I'm being despicable.

Chatting with Ying felt much better than chatting online; this feeling was much more comfortable. Ying told me

her story, and I silently looked into her eyes, constantly responding (please remember to learn

to listen).

Ying asked me if I liked music. I said yes. I told her I loved musical instruments and singing since I was little, but

I still haven't learned any instruments, though I still love singing. Ying excitedly said, "Let's go to

karaoke the other day!" I said, "Okay!" She said I could bring my friends. I lowered my head and said I didn't have any friends in this

city. She said, "It's okay, just the two of us. If you're bored, you can invite my students, they're beautiful!" Haha!

How could I not be tempted by a beautiful girl who studies music? But I still said no. Ying said, "

Then the two of us. Do

n't look down on this old woman!" I gave her a deep kiss, silencing her. After catching her breath, Ying said, "I'll play a piece on the piano for you, do you want to hear it?"

I agreed without hesitation. I slowly picked Ying up and carried her to the bedroom, gently placing her

on the chair next to the piano.

I stood by, watching Ying open the lid and set up the piano. She said to me, "Honey, why don't you get a chair

and sit down ?" I went to get a chair, and the beautiful piano music filled the room.

I thought to myself, Ying is truly a talented woman; she must have had many suitors when she was young. Now, although she's

a bit older, she possesses a refined and otherworldly air; she looks beautiful and mature. Having lived in this

city for so long, I've rarely seen a woman like her.

I moved a stool inside and sat beside Ying, watching her lose herself in her music. As we talked, Ying mentioned the piece

was called "Autumn Whispers." She said she loves autumn, and whenever she's happy, she plays this piece,

able to hear the sounds of autumn—the chirping of insects, the flowing of rivers, the drifting of leaves.

But I couldn't hear any of that; all I heard was that the music was very light and beautiful. Watching Ying play, my

heart stirred again, and I slowly moved closer. I sat behind her and gently embraced her. She continued

playing, ignoring my actions, but I knew she needed me too. I felt her soft, cotton-like body

pressed my chest. My fingers, through her undershirt, slowly teased her nipples, sometimes

circling around her breasts, kneading and pressing, sometimes lightly, sometimes heavily.

The music was still playing, but I could feel Ying's nipples hardening. I released my grip, and Ying

let out a soft sigh. I unhooked Ying's bra through her thermal underwear, then reached forward

to caress her breasts. Although they had been filled, they were still so firm and elastic, too big to hold in one hand. My hand began

to slide down her lower abdomen to her private area; because she was wearing elastic thermal underwear, it was easy to slip my hand

inside .

One hand played with her nipples, while the other touched Ying's private parts through her thin panties. Ying began to pant.

I leaned over her shoulder and whispered in her ear: "Imagine we're

making love , with some yellowing leaves rustling, but that doesn't hinder our progress.

" My lips brushed against her ear, my fingers constantly caressing Ying's nipples and private parts. I could

feel the changes in her lower body; her labia were thickening,

and her panties were damp. Although she was still playing the piano, the pitch was no longer accurate. Although beautiful, it lacked rhythm. We reveled

in the pleasure of caressing, satisfying my perverse desires.

So this is how love can be, how beautiful it can be.

Then there was silence. Ying tilted her head and turned her body. We embraced, and

I felt her body burning hot. Ying offered a sweet kiss, her lips soft and tender, making me not want to leave.

I slid my hand down to her waist and lifted her thermal underwear, slowly pulling it down to her neck. Ying let go, letting the underwear go over her head

. I saw her two full breasts swaying back and forth, and I quickly grabbed them. Ying smiled and said,

"You're so naughty!" I said, "Don't you like it?" "I like it, I like it," Ying quickly said, her smile

captivating me.

We hugged and kissed, and I started to pull Ying's body up, making her stand. Ying knew it was time to take off her thermal underwear, and she

cooperated by standing up, letting me slowly pull it down. Ying was wearing rather sexy lingerie today,

pink with lace trim, semi-transparent, with her sparse black pubic hair faintly visible, making my eyes burn.

I kissed Ying while stroking her labia through her lingerie, occasionally touching her clitoris, causing Ying to tremble

involuntarily . One of Ying's hands began to stroke my already swollen penis through my pants,

laughing as she did so. I asked her why, and she said, "Nothing, I just like it so much."

When I was down to only my underwear, Ying was standing naked in front of me. Ying

slipped my underwear and stroked my penis, saying it was so big (actually, mine isn't that big, only 15 centimeters). I knew this was

the charm of a mature woman, knowing what men like and what they need. I gestured for Ying to come with me to

the piano. I carried Ying to the stool by the piano, sat down first, and let Ying sit on my lap.

Although I didn't penetrate her, we had already made intimate contact. My penis rubbed against Ying's labia and vaginal

opening without going in. One hand circled around her clitoris, while the other squeezed Ying's breasts. I let Ying

continue playing the piano. The music once again echoed in this bedroom of less than 25 square meters, but this time

, although it was still crisp, it was absolutely lewd.

After caressing her for a while, I felt more and more vaginal fluid flowing out of Ying's vagina. I gently lifted Ying's buttocks and let her

sit down. Ying trembled all over, and my penis went in all the way. With Ying's body rising and falling, the music

had long since lost its style.

I thrust hard, penetrating deeply into Ying's body. The piano slammed shut as Ying's hands slammed

onto the keys. I made Ying stand up, her hands resting on the piano's rear end, which I admired from behind. I inserted my penis into Ying's

vagina . Although Ying had given birth, it wasn't very spacious, perhaps due to

a long period without sex. Watching my penis slide in and out, listening to the out-of-tune piano sounds,

I felt immense psychological satisfaction (I'm a pervert). The more I thought about it, the happier I became, thrusting deeper and

harder stroke.

Ying's eyes were tightly closed, and she was humming incessantly in words I couldn't understand—perhaps English, perhaps

her native dialect, or a combination of both. I was incredibly excited by Ying's pleasure. I deliberately teased

her, making her say things she wouldn't normally say, and occasionally stopping my thrusting. Whenever I stopped

, Ying would beg me to hurry up, saying she needed it, saying she was almost there, and begging me not to stop. I knew

I was almost there too. Sometimes stopping is to give yourself a chance to catch your breath.

At Ying's urging, I fucked her hard. The room was filled with the smell of sex and

the sounds . I don't know why there was so much of Ying's vaginal fluid, it covered my legs. The fluid

rubbed and collided between our flesh, making faint sounds that anyone who heard it could imagine.

At the crucial moment, I felt that Ying's lower body seemed to change, it was tighter than before, and Ying

's legs began to tremble. I didn't know if it was because she had reached orgasm or because she had been standing for too long. Ying said passionately,

"Good husband, you're really going to fuck me to death, my dear husband, my good husband... Stop, stop... I'm going to

be...

fucked to death... I'm really... going to lose... lose..."

Every word Ying said hit my already taut nerves, making me lose control. "Slut

, squeeze me tighter, I'm coming too, squeeze tighter..." I swore, not knowing

why I was in that state, perhaps it was just a manifestation of my filthy nature.

As we exchanged lewd words, I tightly embraced Ying's waist and

thrust deeply into her body, powerful spurts of my semen shooting into her uterus. I felt Ying squeezing my penis tightly,

as if she wanted to break it off.

I made Ying sit on my lap again, my penis remaining inside her vagina, unwilling to pull out. I held Ying,

kissing her tongue, my hands caressing her breasts. After a long while, we slowly separated. Ying brought

wet wipes cleaned us both thoroughly. I picked Ying up and gently placed her on the bed. I placed my hand on her vulva,

gently stroking her pubic hair. I said, "Your hair is so nice, and your sex drive is strong too." We

embraced in bed, chatting endlessly. We never stopped caressing each other's

bodies . It felt like we'd never see each other again, and we cherished every second. For the next three days, I

checked out of the hotel and moved into Ying's house. Although we were busy with our own things during the day, every night was

filled with passion.

We went grocery shopping together, cooked together, shopped together, and made love together, spending my

last . Neither of us mentioned when I left.

The day I left, it started to drizzle again. Standing on Ying's balcony, watching the raindrops fall from the sky, I stared blankly

at the hurried pedestrians and the buses that occasionally honked. In a daze, I didn't realize that it was the beginning of...

Whether it was the beginning or the end of the day, Ying was packing my luggage on the bed, like a housewife

packing for her husband who was about to travel far away, so earnest, but silent. I went over and hugged her from behind, turning her over and

giving me a deep kiss. I could no longer control my emotions, nor did I want to control my desires.

I took off Ying's clothes and put her on the bed. After a passionate encounter, Ying hugged me and shed tears.

Seeing Ying's sad face, my heart felt like a jumbled mess of emotions. I stroked Ying's hair, and

for a long time, there was no sound in the room. The silence was as if time and space had stopped. Finally, Ying

broke the silence, "We're going to miss the train." I said, "Then I'll go." "Okay," she said, "Take care of

yourself . I won't see you downstairs." "Okay." I got up, put on my clothes, and hugged the naked Ying without

saying a word.

I didn't know what to say at that moment. I knew that saying anything would be useless. I turned around, took my luggage, and went downstairs. Walking

on the street, watching the people in the rain, I felt like a passerby in Ying's life, but

was a passerby in mine? I know I still have a long way to go, and I know I have to brave the wind and rain.

"Bye-bye Ying, bye-bye." Thinking of this, I gathered my thoughts and took a taxi to the airport.

At the airport, I called Ying. She was still lying in bed, and I knew she should get some rest too!

Later, we kept in touch occasionally. Although we never mentioned sex during our calls,

I knew that whenever I went to that city, I would find a warm and loving place to stay.

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【My Story with Shadows】

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